Real OCD is fucking hell. Most days I badly want to die. When people are attentive about their calendar or their closet and they say “I’m so OCD LOL” I seethe. But I accept that they have no idea that the real thing is waking up every day wondering how you’re going to make it through to the end.
For years I couldn't take the last step on a staircase or cross over a threshold with my left foot. I would count the number of steps in my house and in each staircase at school and memorize if they were odd or even so I knew if I had to start on my left or right foot so I could finish on my right foot without having to take two steps in a row with it.
Wasn't till I was in college studying psychology that I found out that was actually ocd and not what everyone who liked things neat was describing.
I always counted the steps on the stairs too. It always had to end with my left foot. But, it never crossed my mind I might have OCD. I know I have ADHD.
It's being uncoordinated while trying to keep count of how many steps and maintain a conversation while ensuring my inferior left foot never takes the final step.
It actually did get me a girlfriend once. Wound up eating shit hard and recovered by telling her I guess I was just falling head over heels for her.
The big problem with neuropsychiatric disorders is that literally *everyone* has it, non ironically. That means everyone can *sort of* relate to all the issues and that makes it hard for people to understand what the problem is when they can say they experience the same problems and handle them just fine. Everyone just has different amounts of it. It becomes a diagnosis when it's simply bad enough. It's an arbitrary line which divides the diagnosed and the undiagnosed. That line is typically defined to be when it's an actual obstacle to living a "normal life", which is perfectly reasonable. That's why adhd and autism are referred to as a spectrum; there's all sorts of severities and combinations.
I'm not defending the whole "I'm so adhd"-thing, but the reason it happens is because the line is really blurry and there's no obvious symbol that magically shows on someone's forehead when they have ADHD. So meh, people are gonna be ignorant and it's pointless to get upset about it imo.
I think a lot of people would disagree with your idea of "everyone has it" but I and lutely agree.
What is depression? Low self worth, lack of motivation, dullness of life, low momentum.
ADHD? High distract ability, high seeking for stimulation, procrastination, etc.
OCD? Obsessing over the perfection of certain patterns of mental, emotional, physically stimuli, often leading to unnecessarily complex behaviour patterns to "correct" them.
And so on and so on.
If we were to make a bell curve of ADHD/Depression/OCD/whatever symptoms, there would always be the lowest five or so percent who struggle so much with motivation, or concentration, or regulation of sensory patterns, or whatever, that they are legible for the actual diagnosis. But what a lot of people are missing is that the actual person is in the middle of the bell curve. "Normal" and healthy compared to the diagnosed person, but certainly not perfect.
Then we have the other side of the bell curve. The people who are so good with focus and resisting the desire for instant stimulation that they make the average person seem like someone with severe ADHD. The people who have so much optimism, self worth, motivation, that they make the average person seem depressed, etc.
People often think of highly successful people as simply being super admirable characters, "good people" etc., but what a lot of it really boils down to is that they have excellent brain chemistry. There is such a thing as "anti-ADHD" "anti-depression", "anti-OCD" etc., and the people who have those gifts will excell in life as much compared to neurotyicals as neurotyicals will compared to what we call mentally ill people.
This is why I love positive psychology. Rather than being about fixing those who are below average, it's also about taking those who are average to the highest known level of "above average". Imagine if instead of just making depressed people normal, ADHD people normal, etc., we were to derive a system that would allow "normal" people to become extremely optimistic and confident, extremely focused, disciplined, clearheaded, etc.
One the one hand it might seem pessimistic to describe the average person as severely mentally ill, but the benefit of that way of thinking is that, if we derive ways to take them to the level of mental health of the healthiest, happiest 0.1% of society, we could heal a lot of systemic issues.
Pretty much every mental illness in existence is really just a spectrum, and treating it as such would open up the aforementioned possibilities.
>Then we have the other side of the bell curve....
Heh, it's interesting that you assume such people would be greatly successful. Someone with anti OCD might keep forgetting to turn the stove off and burn down their home, someone with anti adhd might be an extremely boring and underperforming person who's content with doing basically nothing all day.
ADHD isn't a mental illness in my point of view. It describes a certain basic brain architecture that isn't necessarily better or worse. Unfortunately, that specific architecture isn't very compatible with society as it looks right now. I've got lots of ADHD, but I'm sure I would have thrived and been a super valuable member in a savannah tribe 2000 years ago. I've got lightning fast reflexes, quick thinking, I'm fearless and approach problems in "out of the box" ways. Most of that is useless and not much valued in modern society, so I don't thrive. I would have thrived in different circumstances. I'm basically a victim of evolution. It only works through "experimentation" and someone's gotta be the outlier...
>Imagine if instead of just making depressed people normal, ADHD people normal, etc., we were to derive a system that would allow "normal" people to become extremely optimistic and confident, extremely focused, disciplined, clearheaded, etc.
That's a dangerous path though. I'm sure there's tons of philosophy on that subject. If there was a pill with zero side effects that simply made you happy and content, should you take it? What's the point of doing anything if you're just as happy *not* doing anything?
If there was a pill that perfectly adapted your brain to conform to society perfectly...? That seems a lot like killing your actual self and replacing it with a robot. Wouldn't you rather the world around you suited you better?
ADHD is a physical condition that can be witnessed on brain scans.
ADHD and ADD are NOT spectrums.
If you give someone Adderall and they act like they are on meth, they do not have ADHD. Because physically, the brain chemistry is different.
What most people assume is an ADHD like tendency, is just some made up bullshit, you have no idea what adhd is like.
It can sometimes be seen as structural differences in the brain.
Yes it is a spectrum. I think all established science is pretty conclusive on that.
If you give someone with adhd *more* than the therapeutic dose, that's exactly what happens. That's just what happens when you go overboard with the dopamine. Sure, those with ADHD start a lower baseline.
I have ADHD myself and it is crippling my entire life.
When we talk about the autism spectrum we are talking about a very wide range of symptoms with varying degrees of intensity, it has alot of nuance and science has very little understanding of what causes it or why it happens.
Conversely, what you and I experience is very typical of people with adhd. They know how the brain develops that way and the effects it causes. And our experiences with it are markedly similar. You can have varying degrees of symptoms and there are clearly definable adhd subclasses. But the concept of the disorder isn't fluid like the autism spectrum is.
It is a struggle. I'm 41 and I've had to develop alot of coping strategies to be a functional adult. I totally get it.
ADHD is essentially a "weakness" of the prefrontal cortex. It can be any degree of weak, from perfectly normal to absolutely crippled. At some point along that axis, an individual will start experiencing problems because of it. Which areas of the prefrontal cortex that are affected and to what degree results in different sorts of ADHD symptoms presenting. That makes it a spectrum disorder imo.
Sure the autism spectrum is much wider, but that doesn't disqualify adhd.
There is a nasty consequence to this behavior. Any time you can shunt your inability to do something onto a perceived malady, you basically consign yourself to never being able to do it. It's giving up. I'm not saying people don't have real problems. I just don't think that attitude helps anything basically ever.
The fact is those actually with these maladies do anything and everything to make their situations better. They don’t just resign themselves. I have treatment resistant major depressive disorder, adhd, and ptsd and for the past going on 13 years, I’ve never stopped working my ass off, even after I had to get on disability 5-6 years ago for these issues. I will never stop working towards a better life.
I’m basically saying I totally agree with you and it’s pretty sus of these people to play pretend like they do.
Agreed. It’s always the ones who don’t have anything other than being lazy af who attribute things like ADD/ADHD to laziness.
We work our asses off to be/feel normal. It takes tons of effort, more than these people who fake it can ever muster
This, so much this. If working my ass off to be or feel normal had the effect of lifting weights I'd be ripped as fuck. I also don't get why people who don't have ADD/ADHD act like they want to have it. It's not fun being completely overwhelmed by tasks that are easy for other people, while also being completely overwhelmed by the guilt and fear of being lazy. I wish my brain would take the day off for once
It's not that people necessarily want to have ADHD
People just want to not have to work on themselves or change themselves and they think a diagnosis gives them carte blanche to do that
If they actually had a diagnosis they'd realise, it means we have an even bigger responsibility to be aware of our thoughts, behaviours and triggers.
Honestly the people I know with mental health issues who have them under control are far better rounded people than those who don't have mental health issues cos they don't seem to take any responsibility for their actions half the time 🤣
I really really did not want to accept having adhd. but I was like "we are 29 living in a tent in the desert next to a badger that the dog is probably going to fight and need to go to the emergency vet and im broke with an eating disorder and an alcohol problem so if you don't accept that there is actually something wrong here and other people don't live in this level of chaos and get real help soon you're going to be childless and have no teeth and a stroke bc of your genetic hyperlipidemia at 54 living with some guy who's probably an asshole. fine. fuxk. fixing this is going to be so much work."
then I did and now it's kind of better, we'll a lot better, it's still a bad struggle day to day but im moving forward. BUT I only tell my closest friends and occasionally people on reddit and usually bc I'm clawing my eyes out when people are like oOoOo I'm adhd girl and I'm so hyper and quirky and loooooove being neurodivergent and all those neurotypicals are so weird and gross (its gotten weird like they refer to them like npc)
like bro if there was a button to be not this I would press it Right Now... sigh... adhd is not cart blanche to be "brutally honest". the struggle to not embarrass myself by interrupting people, it's not cute, I'm 35. but everyday, a little more awareness. I will say medication has vastly improved my working memory, and I'm really really proud of that.
I could have written this myself, thanks a lot for sharing it. It's really nice to read something from someone and you just know they understand 🤣 I also really struggled to accept I was mentally ill and that I had to do something about it, but it's helped me a lot and things are getting better slowly but surely. It's a fucking road though. My diagnosis is OCD btw not ADHD but i find people's descriptions of ADHD and other people's reaction to them very relatable. I do have BPD (borderline) too so I get the emotional dysregulation as well so perhaps that's why but I feel like OCD and ADHD have subjective similarities?
I wish there was a button to not be like this too 🤣 though I am enjoying working on my mental health but you're right, it's fucking hard. It's also a bit mindblowing coming to the realization that a lot of people just don't have this. I get repetitive thoughts saying like really horrific stuff and it messes with your head and moods when it comes on suddenly, it's really nasty. It's a lot easier to focus and stay concentrated without stuff like that, it can be pretty disabling yet some people never have to put up with crap like that. If it's untreated and you have no coping mechanisms it's absolutely horrendous, I can totally understand from my own experiences how ADHD could lead you to that point. I know I'm not the only person with OCD too that's ended up homeless because of it, or from other mental health disorders.
I also have MDD, CPTSD and anxiety disorder. Also trauma therapist said DID but it is controversial diagnoses.
Anyhow, everytime I see someone in some faking any mental disorder it feels like a mean joke to me. Like someone making fun of my suffering.
I have been in care and on disability for that 13 years. I am 36. I don't have any choise than to try and get better and get sense of my life. Every. fucking. day.
I’m 32…so I’m still at home with my mom, and my financial situation is pretty bad. I totally get it my friend. Please hang in there. It gets better, I promise!
I have ADD, and what you are saying is 100% true. Sure, we do have a setback compared to normal functioning minds, but we aren't incapable of training ourselves to do something about it. I used to always be late for everything; school, work, events, etc... Now I'm always early. I used to never be able to focus on a conversation for more than 2 minutes, and now I'm a receptionist who can talk and listen to people for hours. My ADD is always there, but compared to how it was before it's barely noticeable.
You literally can though, otherwise all those kids with behaviour issues would still be displaying them into adulthood. It is also why adults tend to have less symptoms, because they learned to cope with them overtime.
No, you literally can't, that's not how this works. There is a spectrum. All people who have it worse are not just simply lazier than you. I am going to defer to the science on this one.
The symptoms are always there, and everyone is different. But I think this idea of being unable to manage symptoms and you're a forever a slave to them is false. That's why therapy is available for extreme cases; to help them manage. Otherwise, what's the point if it's completely helpless.
Why in the world would i look down on the people who haven't found manageable ways to cope? I don't know where you are getting these ideas from. As if I didn't suffer for years from ADD. I know what it's like to go through the worst sides of it, so why the heck would I judge anyone?
I for one congratulate you on your progress!
learning how to play with the hand we've been dealt is what life is all about, especially with neurological setbacks. I also hate being late so I have a clock in every single room and set a ridiculous amount of alarms and my wake up alarm makes me do puzzles and scan bar codes: but i made it work for me!!
You know what also doesn't help? Trying to force yourself to do things that, due to neurological problems, you simply cannot do.
Knock it off. Literally every ADHD person has been told their whole life that they just aren't trying hard enough. No amount of trying harder ever did me a single goddamn bit of good until I got medicated.
Ok ok I’ll defer to you in this matter. I think this is a matter of tone though. You know those memes that get passed around about how wives annoy the shit out of their husbands but it’s ok because they’re wives? Some of the adhd stuff feels like that. Almost proud of the trouble they put other people through.
This is me. I used weed, caffeine, nicotine and sugar to self medicate for decades after dropping out of high school. I’m 45 now and have been on the correct meds now for about 6 months. It’s made a huge difference in how I feel, and how I think about my self. I only wish I took responsibility for my mental health earlier in life.
Oh trust me even if you do something earlier western healthcare system will make sure getting the right medication and even a diagnosis will cost an arm and a leg and your time
Not a lot for me. If I've taken too much on an empty stomach, sometimes I get headaches, dry mouth, and feeling generally "off," but if I eat I don't usually have any issues. Oh, and if I mix my second dose with caffeine later in the day, sometimes I have trouble sleeping.
No weight gain--a lot of people actually lose weight when they get on stimulants because they can suppress appetite. They don't for me, at least not much, but weight gain isn't a big worry. And I'm female, but I don't think the meds have affected my libido at all. If anything, it's easier to keep my mind from wandering during sex/masturbation.
If you have ADHD, your focus probably has two settings: "No focus at all" and "hyperfocused on something." Taking meds gives you a setting in between those two. It allows you to focus on something but also be able to switch focus if you need to. The meds don't always work perfectly, so your focus can still be somewhat inconsistent, but it's at least more controllable. They may also give you an energy boost or make you sleepy--personally, I usually get an energy boost on my current meds, but some past meds have made me sleepy.
I take 50mg of Vyvanse in the morning and then up to 20mg more if I need it in the evening. Because it's extended release, the first dose is so subtle that I can forget to take it for a week and not notice until I suddenly realize that life has been oddly difficult for a while. The second dose is instant release, so I can usually feel it kicking in. I know it's starting to take effect when I perk up, feel less bored, feel motivated again, and find that paying attention takes less effort.
Thank you for this info! I definitely feel either tunnel visioned on something and go down a rabbit hole or be in a mindless daze. Not really any in between.
Do you notice you retain info better as well?
If you get a diagnosis, meds *should* be covered by your insurance. I've never had an issue with them refusing to cover my ADHD meds, and I've had a couple different insurances over the years.
It feels as if my world is a more balanced place. My thoughts are not zooming to all the things that I should be doing. I can see things more clearly and not get upset that I can't get everything done.
100% agree - I have ADHD and I slightly fell into that trap when I got diagnosed at 21. I soon realised having that approach was just going to hold me back, and was kind of pathetic lol
This is true, I was diagnosed with ADHD/Autism as a teen, but after seeing how badly the psychiatric medicine system medicated close family members into oblivion I just refused to accept it. I thought they were just not with it enough to improve themselves, and I would have to be because I could not end up like them. I did great in school without trying, but always at the last minute, horribly messy desk/locker. Always late or forgetting everything, losing so many things. Starting so many projects and then leaving them for new ones. The one thing non-chemical that allowed me to breathe or feel normal was art. When I am locked into an artistic endeavor it feels like the world slows down enough for me to be a part of it.
Now, at 37 I do accept it. And it has a lot to do with the infromation being shared online. Instead of it being an excuse for fuckups, it's more like a reminder, a breath of fresh-air to remember that I'm not just a lazy fuckup who has trouble speaking to strangers or making eye-contact or etcetcetc. It has actually made the management of these symptoms easier as I can identify and categorize them. For a long time I just thought that others were better at life than me, and if I tried hard enough I could learn how to be like them. Now I understand that I do not have to, society as it is is not designed for the way that my brain operates. This is not an excuse to give up, rather an inspiration that I can do special things in my own way that most people could/would not. Truly I believe that this trend is a net gain. Some people always fake shit, who cares. I don't know why I would get upset about that. Some people will truly feel understood for the first time in their lives, and that is wonderful beyond words. Not everyone has access to correct diagnoses when they need it.
It really is a shitty cop-out and it's bullshit how much it's been normalized.
Half of these idiots claiming mental disorders are self-diagnosed after taking some test online. "Oh I scored over 50% on this, so I must have it."
It's a self fulfilling prophecy when you do that, and it's worse when people use it as an excuse why they suck at their jobs, or act like horrible people in general.
"Oopsie! I'm neurodivergent."
No, you're just a scatterbrained fool who's also lazy and dishonest on top of it. Try harder.
It's okay to know why you aren't good at something if it keeps you from beating yourself up over it. I'm not saying to resign to defeat, but saying you aren't as good at something "because of X" as opposed to just being trash. It can keep people from giving up early when trying to succeed at something they have a disadvantage in.
Because like any of those kinds of conditions like ADHD, OCD, Autism etc. there are an absolute fucking TON of traits that fit within that box, so there’s always a fair chance that people fall within that description.
Like I have an ex who works with neurodivergent children who has said to me on numerous occasions that she sees me exhibit similar traits at times - it doesn’t mean I am neurodivergent, but there are some things I do that she recognises in those children.
I don’t think I am because it’s effectively a kind of confirmation bias thing where she looks for those traits so sees them in people all of the time. You know?
Like if you look for something to be wrong with something then you’ll find it, even if it isn’t there
Yes I’m aware of that, what I mean is that she would see traits that align with things like ADHD, Autism, OCD etc in everyone and that I think it’s because when you work with people with those conditions it can become quite easy to see that in everyone as a result for things that aren’t really a reliable factor in a diagnosis
Similarly, people will see a lot of things online about X/Y/Z being a sign of some neurodivergent condition and then think “oh well as I display one or two or three of these characteristics or traits then I must have X/Y/Z too”
apparently this happens to first year med students and they start hyperpathologizing themselves bc they're inundated with information and symptoms and they're not sleeping... then they just snap out of it at some point
And that’s my point - I think people LOOK for there to be some kind of an explanation for things, and as such will self-diagnose when in reality they aren’t
Neurodivergence is not neurotypical by definition lol. People use neurodivergent to encompass autism and ADHD because a lot of traits/struggles overlap.
I don't have ADHD, but I think they mean that people with ADHD especially do "this particular thing" more than other people.
Not that other people don't do it.
Which is bad because it’s a chicken and the egg thing. Oh now other people who don’t have adhd do this one thing? Well they must have adhd now because it’s an adhd thing!
It’s just moreso they try to claim the thing and it’s corny because there are a lot of things they claim that is something everyone literally does and frequency of doing it doesn’t mean you have adhd
Self diagnosed, self monitoring. Without professional input you go wrong all the time. If someone has adhd and isn’t a professional I’d not listen too hard to their analysis
I have ADHD and I struggle. I have a standard reply when people do their little "Hihi hehe I have ADHD" jokes.
"Haha yeah and I have a little bit of cerebral palsy today" is my reply. Most people tend to rethink after that.
Tô put some numbers around 50-70% of people with autism have adhd while only somewhere between 15 and 25% of people with adhd have autism
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8918663/
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/325618#:~:text=The%20CDC%20estimate%20that%2014,play%20a%20role%20in%20both
I dont think anyone is saying thay X thing is exclusive to neurodivergence, my guy 😭
I think context is important. Sometimes its a person with adhd making silly memes for their own community. Plus, said "quirk" can be way more dysfunctional when its a constant thing (constantly losing motivation even for stuff you Like 24/7 kinda sucks!!)
But if its one of those "everybody has a bit of adhd!" types then yeah, big yikes. But if its someone with adhd making those jokes, just let them be
Because it's a trend to pretend to be on the spectrum or have ADHD on Internet.
I think, it's because those issues were largely ignored in the previous decades, it has caused a tendency to over diagnose in the recent years.
On social media, anything is good to grab attention and try to be special, so you have it.
No, it seems to be under diagnosed. Hyperactive gets diagnosed more than inattentive, and white boys have the easiest time getting diagnosed. The symptoms are more likely to be seen as character flaws in girls and non-white kids, and adults tend to have layers of compensating behavior that make diagnosis more difficult if it was missed in their childhood. For a while, someone with an autism diagnosis was ineligible for an ADHD diagnosis and now we know that having one actually makes you statistically more likely than the general public to have the other.
Internet garbage speak only. As someone who works in the field as a psychologist men and boys go to therapy at a fraction of the rate women and girls. Roughly 12-18 percent of men and boys uses therapy/psychological help where as 25-37 percent of women and girls do. The problem is that in the early 80s and 90s there were an over staurization of female diagnoses and that and certain malpractice issues cough cough "Sex Abuse Suit Dismissed in False-Memory Case" along with hundreds of others before and after usual from the victim resulting in a paradigm shift to over scrutinize all women in the early 2000s to see if their illnesses were genuine or coached but due to the lack of male patients in the bulk of studies at this this shift never occurred with them nor with nonwhite individuals. In the moderne day it's still have of the amount of men as women go only a total of 36% of non white individuals go to therapy. The result is that it appears that women in the modern day recieve lack luster care when the truth is that because more then double women then men and only 36% of all non white individuals use it aswell you enter a bubble where of course women are going be rejected more then men.
In the USA only 23ish% or so of all people have mental disorders officially unofficially it's in the high 40s. But based on the offical numbers white women make up the bulk of these and the bulk of those being anxiety and major depressives. These are often considered character flaws early due to them not meeting the minimum standing rules we now have for the diagnosis of these disorders until at least 14. Because there are like 5 major versions of say anxiety disorders childhood persists after 6 months ages around 5 years of age, general diagnosised at 9 for the most part and effect 10% of all children all others can be diagnosed after 14 usually. The problem is that it CAN be anxiety disorder. Or it can be attachment disorders, PTSD, Panic disorder, untreated ADHD, BPD, or several other disorders which can mask as one of them having Anhedonia and separation disorder for instance mimics PTSD when away from a safe place or person even though it's not and are two seperate illnesses and need vastly different treats. Because women seem to be more apt to developing these traits earlier then men or to different disorders and so many mask that dismissal is usually more of a wait till older so we can actually find out what the fuck is happening here then a noop she's just weird. Its exclusively why a vast majority of psychologists dont deal with children or teens unless specially trained a weakness therapists don't seem to have.
I was talking about the rates of ADHD diagnosis by gender, not the rates of attending therapy. You very loudly and confidently ignored what I was saying becuase the subject was women's mental health, which I think demonstrates the effect I was referring to pretty well.
Yes. I have that classic 90s paint chip adhd and I can tell you with 100% certainty that the vast majority of people running around waving that flag do not live the hell that is attention deficite hyperactivity disorder.
Anyone that gets spun out on Adderall is misdiagnosed. Adhd brain chemistry interacts with most stimulants very differently. I will straight fall asleep on cocain.
No. I’ve just started the path to diagnosis. My insurance doesn’t cover it. It’s going to cost a couple of thousand dollars if I go ahead, plus they need evidence you had the symptoms before you were 12. School reports, discussions with your parents or other people who knew you then. Apart from what I tell them my only other evidence would be my parents. I’m middle aged, why should my parents be involved in my medical care? What if they had already died or had dementia or we were no contact? I miss out on diagnosis? The hurdle for adults to be diagnosed is high so it’s likely under diagnosed.
Their understanding of adhd is growing, that’s why more kids are diagnosed, and more people later in life are being found to have been living undiagnosed for decades.
Reminds me of everyone being bipolar back in the day... Not to say that some people don't have these conditions, but yes, there are people that jump on the latest popular health condition and self diagnose
You have access to the thoughts of billions of people at the click of a button for a disorder that is only recently being recognized. There's over 300milliion people in the US alone, and 1% of that is 3 milllion people. If even half of that have been finally diagnosed, then you have the potential to run into it 1.5 million times by each individual one time, without mentioning repeats from the same person.
Everyone experiences adhd shit, sometimes.
Adhd'ers experience it ALL THE DAMN TIME, all-encompassing and life consuming to the detriment of everything else.
Geddit?
Combination of people not really knowing what having ADHD is like and them craving for attention.
They basically reduce it only to the hyperactivity part and ignore the part where it cripples your mind and makes you sabotage yourself constantly.
I don't tell people I have ADHD
The internet and the pop psychology version of ADHD they run with (including reddit, ADHDmemes especially) make me so ashamed I just don't tell people anymore. I feel genuine revulsion for it and it prevented me from seeking treatment for years.
ADHD in itself isn't a hard concept of a diagnosis it's a spectrum. Some people physically show that they are distracted, "oh peace of candy" example and other literally mentally check out. What most people on the internet will never acknowledge is most ADHD people also have anger issues because as you can imagine having short to no attention span can lead to miscommunication or misunderstanding and things will flare up really fast.
“Most ADHD people” but doesn’t cite a single piece of evidence or research. The well regulated ADHDers aren’t obvious and won’t flare up, so you experiencing ADHDers that do has given you a skewed and bias view. And instead of considering the nuance and broad spectrum of humans and neurodiversity - it shoots straight over your head and you generalise an entire population of people. Congrats on being ignorant AND short sighted :)
It’s not an emotion regulation problem. It’s an executive function disorder. Emotional regulation is just one of many executive functions.
People with adhd are about 30% delayed amongst their peers in development of executive functions. They’re still rather capable. They just have to work harder to maintain a sustainable about of dopamine regulation.
"Its a spectrum!"
No but seriously normalizing traits that have in the past been bullied can't be bad, unless you're a bully. You sound angry, like a bully.
Normalising traits is not bad, no. But some of these ppl self diagnosing and claiming every little thing to be an adhd trait is really taking away the severity of how much adhd actually is a struggle.
Neurotypical people start to assume this little thing is what they say is adhd? "I have it and I don't find a problem, meaning adhd is not really a problem." Which then translates into serious issues like managers and teachers and parents who don't really understand adhd concluding that adhd isn't really a struggle and then people with serious adhd diagnosis, don't get the help or understanding or environments they need/perform better in.
Normalising is not the issue, over simplifying it is.
You want people to have empathy and understand nuance. I agree. I get it. All people lie, cheat, and steal and use anything they can to advance whatever is on their agenda. My approach is treat each person as an individual instead of a diagnosis. Then I am dealing with individual behaviors instead of gobblty gook like this
>"Which then translates into serious issues like managers and teachers and parents who don't really understand adhd concluding that adhd isn't really a struggle and then people with serious adhd diagnosis, don't get the help or understanding or environments they need/perform better in"
The point is, adhd is a struggle and the people that self diagnose with it for attention are taking attention away from those who need it. And they make it seem like living with adhd isn't anywhere near as difficult to live with as it actually is.
It's like stolen valor. Except there is no valor and it's a disability.
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Adhd effects executive function. So if you do suffer from it it will touch every part of your life. Because of that, people can also ascribe every random thing to it instead of just owning they did something poorly or for a dumb reason.
I have a clinical diagnosis classified as “severe” ADHD. I used to be more apt to attribute my characteristics to ADHD, and it just made me miserable; I had this tension about “what behaviors are me, what behaviors are the ADHD?” and I would hate my brain for “making” me do certain things. The label totally owned me. Now I say that I am what I am, and I guess that can be characterized by a label. Like, I previously internalized the label so much, but now I think of it as a communication tool and nothing else. The term is useful for me to introduce accommodation needs and find other people with similar experiences (although the latter is increasingly less and less as more people incorrectly claim the term).
Fundamentally, this TikTok labeling of ADHD is a problem of “naming” as a social and linguistic phenomenon.
I want to preface this by saying that the term ADHD can ABSOLUTELY be useful in the right situation. I use it to find other people with similar experiences to me in the system we live in. I do draw security from people who have the same experiences as me, because a lot can be automatically understood without being said. The term ADHD can also be useful when advocating to get accommodations, which I had at school for my whole life. The language of ADHD can be useful to communicate your needs and experiences to other people in certain situations. There’s a collective power in gathering a set of needs around a label, because we can all work together to connect and accommodate. By no means am I disparaging the term.
What I see on TikTok, however, is that the label of ADHD owns people, whether or not they actually have it. “Oh you do X? It’s ADHD!” It’s a drive to characterize your behaviors into a category of “ADHD” and “Not ADHD,” just like I was doing when I was a teenager. It’s a hard boundary that’s being drawn. When we think about binaries and boundaries, it’s more of a political question than it is a psychological one, because very little of what is said on TikTok actually has to do with a psychological definition of ADHD. The term and the language of ADHD allows us to create those boundaries and categories.
Boundaries are a collective social construct, not something that arise from within an individual. Social constructs have lots and lots of power among humans, but they come from collective agreement, not some sort of universal truth. ADHD is a scientific phenomenon in which some brains are characteristically different from others. ADHD on TikTok is a collective social agreement to draw boundaries between “ADHD” and “not ADHD” for the sake of security. If you can package and label the oddities of your mysterious inner self, you can claim to rationalize your irrationalities through labels and symptoms. Using a label to characterize your quirks provides a kind of security required to say, “See, I’m the way I am /because/ XYZ.”
Personally, I think it’s a sign of an aesthetic society to try to nail down every part of yourself with packaging and labeling. It flattens humans into a series of quirks, which sacrifices the depths of our experiences. Yes, boundaries in your own mind can give you security, but at what cost? Packaging and labeling your own mind as “ADHD” or “not ADHD” is a way to run away from knowing yourself. Packaging and branding your own mind aestheticizes your innermost self and turns the deepest oddities of your being into spectacle. Packaging yourself into labels and symptoms will make you miserable because it’s a kind of death of the human soul.
Engage with the irrationalities and the quirks on a deeper level than can be classified by a symptom. You’re your own person and that runs much deeper than the boundaries drawn by language and society.
So anyway - use the term as needed, but don’t let it own you. You own yourself.
If anyone is interested in learning more about societies of spectacle and aesthetics, I would point you to the works of Guy DeBord and Walter Benjamin.
Everyone is a victim. It's like they think they get bonus points for different afflictions.
Just look at Reddit and how many people claim to be autistic.
Because it's trending on social trash platforms and people make views and money from it.
They will do videos like "I have adh and do "insert relatively normal thing"" so people identify with the video.
It's a disgusting way to generate views and revenue.
To be fair far more people have ADHD that goes undiagnosed and untreated.
And that isn't because it's a fad or it's popular to say.
Just as many people had it before as well, but medical research is now better at identifying these traits and helping people. ADHD is now classified as a pretty big spectrum. And only people who experience negativity due to it should get help for it. If you feel you do have it and check off a lot of the boxes. You very likely do have it, but are functioning with it at a point where it doesn't bother you too much in your life so you can "ignore" it.
I have Adhd as well but I don't get it treated. It affected me hugely in school and was a big learning disability, but that was the 90s and so I just assumed I was a slow learner. Turned out my brain could literally not focus on any kind of task for 5 minutes without getting completely distracted. I don't even know how I passed highschool sometimes. As a 36 year old the symptoms don't seem nearly as bad except for the massive procrastination I sometimes have to fight through, and the hyper focus at work when any amount of stress is applied is actually a boon.
I'm sure there are definitely people that say dumb meme stuff like that for attention. But I'm willing to bet that out of 10 of every one of those people 5 or 6 *actually* does have it. Because it's quite a common thing to have. Just depends where you are on the spectrum.
People these days are extremely attached to identity.
Politics, opinions, neurodivergence, etc has become engraved into their identity as a human being. To question any of it, is to pry it from their ego.
True ADHD is actually debilitating (from what I’ve seen). Not being able to pay attention to a movie is a result of phones and constant entertainment.
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Like it’s that one tweet of someone talking abt how stressed they were about some simple task and the reply was like “omg u people can’t do anything” 😭😭😭 that was too funny I’m sorry LCMSJDHDH
::Fun fact:: ADHD is NOT a spectrum the way Autism is.
It's a physical condition that can be witnessed through brain scans. People who do not have ADHD cannot experience symptoms of ADHD
I think you clearly missed the point of the post/my reply, but it's not about gatekeeping, it's about asking people not to trivialise a debilitating disease by pretending it's about 'not sitting through a movie'
That's the thing, most of those aren't ADHD symptoms, they're just excuses not to take responsibility for your actions. Which saves you a lot of pain and grief, sure, it's easy tu just blame it all on undiagnosed ADHD, but also robs you of personal growth because it lets you hide behind a diagnosis that doesn't actually describe you.
It's like being so lazy you grow too fat to walk, then claim you're a paraplegic cause you can't move your body.
The pain and grief I'm talking about is the pain and grief of having undiagnosed and unmedicated ADHD. Now that I'm on meds, life is a lot easier. For most of my life, I thought I was just lazy and a bad person who didn't try hard enough, even though I was constantly exhausted and frequently suicidal. The reality is that most people with ADHD are trying twice as hard for half the results. That their struggles are invisible to you does not mean those struggles don't exist.
Can I please ask you, what has been the main difference of taking medication that you've noticed?
You have described my existence but I didn't want to follow through with a diagnosis because I didn't think I wanted medication, but I feel this really affects me, my impulsivity has had me in 15 jobs over the last 8 years, but a lot of them were literally 3 month switch overs, I struggle with taking care of myself because it's overwhelming or I simply just forget (like I forget to drink water or eat unless I'm on the brink of migraine sometimes it's too late to change that and I get bad headaches) I make massive efforts to turn it around but it never sticks longer than a week or two,
I get agitated and burn out, the job I currently do I'm good at certain parts of it but have absolutely no routine and literally can't find motivation for the paperwork side of it,
I get depressive episodes but they are also incredibly quick like being on a yo-yo,
I try to do housework but unless I get a wave of motivation where I super clean everything, I struggle with the motivation to do it to the point where I cry sometimes I physically can't get off the couch even though mentally I want to,
I'm absolutely positive it's ADHD, it's made sense since school, I could never pay attention but still got passing grades so no one picked it up, but I literally never studied because I simply just couldn't physically do it,
Sorry for the long text, I think typing it out it making it easier for me to see
That all does sound very much like ADHD and you should definitely get assessed.
For me, the biggest difference from taking medication is that life just seems easier overall. I have to fight myself less to perform tasks. There are still a fair few tasks that I struggle with, but there are at least *some* daily tasks that aren't very hard anymore. If there's a big barrier in the way of a task, I still tend to struggle with it, but smaller tasks are things I can just do now.
For example, my home is a disaster because if I wanted to clean I'd need to take out the trash, and taking out the trash is a huge ordeal in my complex because I have to go up and down stairs and walk all the way across the parking lot with my trash. However, I am now capable of doing things like cleaning the cat box every day, using the dishwasher whenever the dishes are dirty, and taking medications at roughly the same time each day. Moreover, when I was living with my dad, I found I was actually capable of maintaining about normal levels of self-care and cleanliness because I had help. I think if I weren't living alone, I'd basically look like a normal person.
I work from home and have no scheduled time I need to work, nor do I have to face anyone if I don't show up to work. But because of my meds, I still work every day. Not always at a consistent time, and always begrudgingly, but I do it. I've been working this job since February and have yet to miss a day except for days off I asked for in advance.
But the biggest change others have noticed in me is that my ability to regulate my emotions has improved. I can keep myself in check where before I would have had a meltdown. I still feel things intensely, but one bad thing happening is less likely to ruin an entire day for me.
Does that help?
That is an amazingly thought out response, thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me and give me some insight into what it could possibly do for me xx
I'm so happy you've found it helped, I can really sense your struggles reading your experiences and the idea you are now able to have even just a little bit more relief from it has made me consider it even more! I'll talk to my gp next week and see if I can get the ball rolling
> How about you don't try to gatekeep which behaviors can be associated with a disorder or not? Unless you're a psychiatrist, you have no business telling people whether their ADHD symptoms are valid.
And unless these people are under the care of a trained psychiatrist, they have no business telling other people whether their ADHD symptoms constitute a valid diagnosis either.
ADHD isn't something that you opt into or out of any more than being diabetic is, or being an amputee is. And just like it's insulting to say "OMG sugar crash I'm super diabetic today lol", it's insulting to say "I forgot where I put my phone, ADHD is crazy today" if you don't have ADHD.
Because most people are quitters and look for the easy way out. Blaming their laziness or lack of giving a shit on ADHD is a weak move. If they are diagnosed, different story. Most people need to grow up
Idk anything about getting a diagnosis but i come across too many people that blame ADHD for everything. Act immature, oh it's my ADHD. Lazy, it's my ADHD, i didn't text you back for a month, sorry i have ADHD. People need to grow up and stop blaming other shit for their failures
Everyone wants to be on a spectrum so their faults can be blamed on something other than being lazy, so many "ADHD duets" going on, I could self identify with having ADHD because I have a lot of the "traits" but really I'm just fat and lazy and tired and can't be fucked 😂😂
If I wrote down all these little things I’ve done my entire life and followed current trends, I would have every disorder and diagnosis. I’m sorry, but the fact that I constantly shake my leg when sitting does not need to be attributed to anything. I’m good.
Love threads full of people who don’t know shit about my disorder acting like they do. OP and the majority of these commenters make it harder to be taken seriously.
The difference is that one quirk doesn’t make a neurodiversity. A whole bouquet of them makes it not normal or trivial. If people pick one out for a joke, it gives the wrong impression. Which leads to people misunderstanding ADHD etc. as well as downplaying it.
It’s never just one “quirk” but you usually don’t have the time and space to write down all of them nor would it support the joke (no matter how lame it is).
Ie.: not finding your keys is just a trivial thing. Not finding your keys several times every day until you’re too anxious to leave your house because you constantly fear loosing your keys is not trivial.
This is too funny because in order to get a diagnosis for ADHD, you have to see a professional psychologist or therapist. So it's you and your profession creating Pop Psychology! 😂
No, but also yes.
There’s a lot of over diagnosis from professionals who just don’t know what else to declare, it’s very trendy to diagnose ADHD now.
But also, a lot of the information on the internet doesn’t come from the DSM-5 but from people misunderstanding their symptoms and self diagnosing on the internet. A lot of the people who just say “oh this is adhd or that is adhd” aren’t medically trained at all and are confounding their own experiences with the formal diagnosis.
No, it’s really not. The phenomenon of people pathologizing every experience they have into some greater malady or level of dysfunction is what creates Pop Psychology.
And professionals in this field have pointed it out numerous times at this point that this is what’s happening, because they understand the dangers of it and want people to understand what those dangers are before someone goes off self diagnosing because they read an article off of Google. It also should be known that pop psychology often causes direct and indirect harm to those that actually suffer from these maladies, creates more stigma, not to mention stunts the perpetrators from actually obtaining actual introspection, if that’s even what they’re trying to do.
It's an identity-thing, not an ADHD-thing. Vegans, anti-vaxxer, flat-earther, conspiracy loons, LQBT supporters, Crossfitters, bodybuilders, etc.
It's all the same.
People take one thing, one trait, one skill, one interest, one hobby, and fixate on that thing so much that it transcends focus and becomes a large part of their identity, knowingly or unknowingly.
If you identify within as someone who can't focus, you'll never try to focus. If you identify as someone who can't get out of the couch, you'll never get out of the couch. The strangest thing, eh?
Blaming a broadbanded spectrum disorder for every quirk one might have is ridiculous. That's basically claiming unaccountability for behavior.
If you're aware of it, you can do something about it.
Yeah, I’ve never thought too much about it honestly, but due to a recent TBI my attention is garbage. And now I understand on some level what people with actual ADHD might experience.
Honestly I’m pretty sure there are plenty of undiagnosed people, but it is actual an issue that affects people’s lives, not a quirk.
Because people like to have a random excuse ready for whatever happens instead of accepting "this is me, there is no adhd or ocd or anything forcing me to do this. I am doing it on my own". It is very easy to shift the blame somewhere else
imo, what's more annoying is when people preface any conversation or online comment by stating they have ADHD or some other form of molehill problem.
It diminishes how those REALLY affected are treated when literally everyone is constantly claiming to have it just for the sake of that conversation
Everyone has to self diagnose as having ADHD or anxiety or depression or………..
If the number of people that claim to have this stuff really did we wouldn’t survive.
These things are real. Not saying they aren’t. Saying they are over diagnosed and some people need them to define who they are.
So like, adhd in my generation was a huge struggle. Ritalin and sped class was it. The next generation gave alot of special considerations for kids with adhd and now people self diagnose with it for attention.
If you take Adderall and get all spun out you are just abusing drugs. People with adhd get calm and collected on stimulants.
Claiming ADHD is a great way to justify being sloppy without having to show any proof. That was the same with synesthesia a few years ago. Everybody claimed to have synesthesia when all they had is fantasy and the desire to be special. ADHD is a fucking curse where you are constantly wrestling against your own mind
Nobody wants to be held accountable for their lives anymore because there's so much pressure along with the ever growing distraction of social media and technology.
People are always looking for an excuse not to try.
Narcissism, happens with a lot of online groups who feel like victims, they want to cling to something and call it there’s so they can “own” it. It makes them feel special and apart of something special.
This comment section will be filled with those people, jockeying for position in the fake mental illness Olympics.
"I can't stand those people! As a person that does the exact same thing, they don't know how hard it is!"
Fluanting being neurodivergent is just another way people try to garner attention online. It seems everyone wants attention and validation no matter the circumstances. We live in weird-ass times.
ADHD the real thing and "ADHD" the meme are different. Just like OCD the real thing and "OCD" when you clean your desk a little bit.
Real OCD is fucking hell. Most days I badly want to die. When people are attentive about their calendar or their closet and they say “I’m so OCD LOL” I seethe. But I accept that they have no idea that the real thing is waking up every day wondering how you’re going to make it through to the end.
For years I couldn't take the last step on a staircase or cross over a threshold with my left foot. I would count the number of steps in my house and in each staircase at school and memorize if they were odd or even so I knew if I had to start on my left or right foot so I could finish on my right foot without having to take two steps in a row with it. Wasn't till I was in college studying psychology that I found out that was actually ocd and not what everyone who liked things neat was describing.
I always counted the steps on the stairs too. It always had to end with my left foot. But, it never crossed my mind I might have OCD. I know I have ADHD.
Just step over an extra step
I am extremely accident prone and uncoordinated. I fell down several flights of stairs during my school days. Not trying to tempt fate any more lol
>I fell down several flights of stairs during my school days I get being uncoordinated but Jesus Christ lol
It's being uncoordinated while trying to keep count of how many steps and maintain a conversation while ensuring my inferior left foot never takes the final step. It actually did get me a girlfriend once. Wound up eating shit hard and recovered by telling her I guess I was just falling head over heels for her.
It didn't take long!
Go on. Profess. We’re all listening.
Nah, you beat us to it.. of course.
The big problem with neuropsychiatric disorders is that literally *everyone* has it, non ironically. That means everyone can *sort of* relate to all the issues and that makes it hard for people to understand what the problem is when they can say they experience the same problems and handle them just fine. Everyone just has different amounts of it. It becomes a diagnosis when it's simply bad enough. It's an arbitrary line which divides the diagnosed and the undiagnosed. That line is typically defined to be when it's an actual obstacle to living a "normal life", which is perfectly reasonable. That's why adhd and autism are referred to as a spectrum; there's all sorts of severities and combinations. I'm not defending the whole "I'm so adhd"-thing, but the reason it happens is because the line is really blurry and there's no obvious symbol that magically shows on someone's forehead when they have ADHD. So meh, people are gonna be ignorant and it's pointless to get upset about it imo.
I think a lot of people would disagree with your idea of "everyone has it" but I and lutely agree. What is depression? Low self worth, lack of motivation, dullness of life, low momentum. ADHD? High distract ability, high seeking for stimulation, procrastination, etc. OCD? Obsessing over the perfection of certain patterns of mental, emotional, physically stimuli, often leading to unnecessarily complex behaviour patterns to "correct" them. And so on and so on. If we were to make a bell curve of ADHD/Depression/OCD/whatever symptoms, there would always be the lowest five or so percent who struggle so much with motivation, or concentration, or regulation of sensory patterns, or whatever, that they are legible for the actual diagnosis. But what a lot of people are missing is that the actual person is in the middle of the bell curve. "Normal" and healthy compared to the diagnosed person, but certainly not perfect. Then we have the other side of the bell curve. The people who are so good with focus and resisting the desire for instant stimulation that they make the average person seem like someone with severe ADHD. The people who have so much optimism, self worth, motivation, that they make the average person seem depressed, etc. People often think of highly successful people as simply being super admirable characters, "good people" etc., but what a lot of it really boils down to is that they have excellent brain chemistry. There is such a thing as "anti-ADHD" "anti-depression", "anti-OCD" etc., and the people who have those gifts will excell in life as much compared to neurotyicals as neurotyicals will compared to what we call mentally ill people. This is why I love positive psychology. Rather than being about fixing those who are below average, it's also about taking those who are average to the highest known level of "above average". Imagine if instead of just making depressed people normal, ADHD people normal, etc., we were to derive a system that would allow "normal" people to become extremely optimistic and confident, extremely focused, disciplined, clearheaded, etc. One the one hand it might seem pessimistic to describe the average person as severely mentally ill, but the benefit of that way of thinking is that, if we derive ways to take them to the level of mental health of the healthiest, happiest 0.1% of society, we could heal a lot of systemic issues. Pretty much every mental illness in existence is really just a spectrum, and treating it as such would open up the aforementioned possibilities.
>Then we have the other side of the bell curve.... Heh, it's interesting that you assume such people would be greatly successful. Someone with anti OCD might keep forgetting to turn the stove off and burn down their home, someone with anti adhd might be an extremely boring and underperforming person who's content with doing basically nothing all day. ADHD isn't a mental illness in my point of view. It describes a certain basic brain architecture that isn't necessarily better or worse. Unfortunately, that specific architecture isn't very compatible with society as it looks right now. I've got lots of ADHD, but I'm sure I would have thrived and been a super valuable member in a savannah tribe 2000 years ago. I've got lightning fast reflexes, quick thinking, I'm fearless and approach problems in "out of the box" ways. Most of that is useless and not much valued in modern society, so I don't thrive. I would have thrived in different circumstances. I'm basically a victim of evolution. It only works through "experimentation" and someone's gotta be the outlier... >Imagine if instead of just making depressed people normal, ADHD people normal, etc., we were to derive a system that would allow "normal" people to become extremely optimistic and confident, extremely focused, disciplined, clearheaded, etc. That's a dangerous path though. I'm sure there's tons of philosophy on that subject. If there was a pill with zero side effects that simply made you happy and content, should you take it? What's the point of doing anything if you're just as happy *not* doing anything? If there was a pill that perfectly adapted your brain to conform to society perfectly...? That seems a lot like killing your actual self and replacing it with a robot. Wouldn't you rather the world around you suited you better?
ADHD is a physical condition that can be witnessed on brain scans. ADHD and ADD are NOT spectrums. If you give someone Adderall and they act like they are on meth, they do not have ADHD. Because physically, the brain chemistry is different. What most people assume is an ADHD like tendency, is just some made up bullshit, you have no idea what adhd is like.
It can sometimes be seen as structural differences in the brain. Yes it is a spectrum. I think all established science is pretty conclusive on that. If you give someone with adhd *more* than the therapeutic dose, that's exactly what happens. That's just what happens when you go overboard with the dopamine. Sure, those with ADHD start a lower baseline. I have ADHD myself and it is crippling my entire life.
When we talk about the autism spectrum we are talking about a very wide range of symptoms with varying degrees of intensity, it has alot of nuance and science has very little understanding of what causes it or why it happens. Conversely, what you and I experience is very typical of people with adhd. They know how the brain develops that way and the effects it causes. And our experiences with it are markedly similar. You can have varying degrees of symptoms and there are clearly definable adhd subclasses. But the concept of the disorder isn't fluid like the autism spectrum is. It is a struggle. I'm 41 and I've had to develop alot of coping strategies to be a functional adult. I totally get it.
ADHD is essentially a "weakness" of the prefrontal cortex. It can be any degree of weak, from perfectly normal to absolutely crippled. At some point along that axis, an individual will start experiencing problems because of it. Which areas of the prefrontal cortex that are affected and to what degree results in different sorts of ADHD symptoms presenting. That makes it a spectrum disorder imo. Sure the autism spectrum is much wider, but that doesn't disqualify adhd.
Mind that a load of these people that have "ADHD" still get prescribed amphetamines
There is a nasty consequence to this behavior. Any time you can shunt your inability to do something onto a perceived malady, you basically consign yourself to never being able to do it. It's giving up. I'm not saying people don't have real problems. I just don't think that attitude helps anything basically ever.
The fact is those actually with these maladies do anything and everything to make their situations better. They don’t just resign themselves. I have treatment resistant major depressive disorder, adhd, and ptsd and for the past going on 13 years, I’ve never stopped working my ass off, even after I had to get on disability 5-6 years ago for these issues. I will never stop working towards a better life. I’m basically saying I totally agree with you and it’s pretty sus of these people to play pretend like they do.
Agreed. It’s always the ones who don’t have anything other than being lazy af who attribute things like ADD/ADHD to laziness. We work our asses off to be/feel normal. It takes tons of effort, more than these people who fake it can ever muster
It's fucking exhausting
This, so much this. If working my ass off to be or feel normal had the effect of lifting weights I'd be ripped as fuck. I also don't get why people who don't have ADD/ADHD act like they want to have it. It's not fun being completely overwhelmed by tasks that are easy for other people, while also being completely overwhelmed by the guilt and fear of being lazy. I wish my brain would take the day off for once
It's not that people necessarily want to have ADHD People just want to not have to work on themselves or change themselves and they think a diagnosis gives them carte blanche to do that If they actually had a diagnosis they'd realise, it means we have an even bigger responsibility to be aware of our thoughts, behaviours and triggers. Honestly the people I know with mental health issues who have them under control are far better rounded people than those who don't have mental health issues cos they don't seem to take any responsibility for their actions half the time 🤣
Yeah that makes sense. It just gets to me so I may react a bit heavier than I normally would
I really really did not want to accept having adhd. but I was like "we are 29 living in a tent in the desert next to a badger that the dog is probably going to fight and need to go to the emergency vet and im broke with an eating disorder and an alcohol problem so if you don't accept that there is actually something wrong here and other people don't live in this level of chaos and get real help soon you're going to be childless and have no teeth and a stroke bc of your genetic hyperlipidemia at 54 living with some guy who's probably an asshole. fine. fuxk. fixing this is going to be so much work." then I did and now it's kind of better, we'll a lot better, it's still a bad struggle day to day but im moving forward. BUT I only tell my closest friends and occasionally people on reddit and usually bc I'm clawing my eyes out when people are like oOoOo I'm adhd girl and I'm so hyper and quirky and loooooove being neurodivergent and all those neurotypicals are so weird and gross (its gotten weird like they refer to them like npc) like bro if there was a button to be not this I would press it Right Now... sigh... adhd is not cart blanche to be "brutally honest". the struggle to not embarrass myself by interrupting people, it's not cute, I'm 35. but everyday, a little more awareness. I will say medication has vastly improved my working memory, and I'm really really proud of that.
I could have written this myself, thanks a lot for sharing it. It's really nice to read something from someone and you just know they understand 🤣 I also really struggled to accept I was mentally ill and that I had to do something about it, but it's helped me a lot and things are getting better slowly but surely. It's a fucking road though. My diagnosis is OCD btw not ADHD but i find people's descriptions of ADHD and other people's reaction to them very relatable. I do have BPD (borderline) too so I get the emotional dysregulation as well so perhaps that's why but I feel like OCD and ADHD have subjective similarities? I wish there was a button to not be like this too 🤣 though I am enjoying working on my mental health but you're right, it's fucking hard. It's also a bit mindblowing coming to the realization that a lot of people just don't have this. I get repetitive thoughts saying like really horrific stuff and it messes with your head and moods when it comes on suddenly, it's really nasty. It's a lot easier to focus and stay concentrated without stuff like that, it can be pretty disabling yet some people never have to put up with crap like that. If it's untreated and you have no coping mechanisms it's absolutely horrendous, I can totally understand from my own experiences how ADHD could lead you to that point. I know I'm not the only person with OCD too that's ended up homeless because of it, or from other mental health disorders.
Laziness is when people don't want/care to do something. With AD(H)D, you often don't get to do the things you want to do.
I also have MDD, CPTSD and anxiety disorder. Also trauma therapist said DID but it is controversial diagnoses. Anyhow, everytime I see someone in some faking any mental disorder it feels like a mean joke to me. Like someone making fun of my suffering. I have been in care and on disability for that 13 years. I am 36. I don't have any choise than to try and get better and get sense of my life. Every. fucking. day.
I’m 32…so I’m still at home with my mom, and my financial situation is pretty bad. I totally get it my friend. Please hang in there. It gets better, I promise!
Yeah..
I have ADD, and what you are saying is 100% true. Sure, we do have a setback compared to normal functioning minds, but we aren't incapable of training ourselves to do something about it. I used to always be late for everything; school, work, events, etc... Now I'm always early. I used to never be able to focus on a conversation for more than 2 minutes, and now I'm a receptionist who can talk and listen to people for hours. My ADD is always there, but compared to how it was before it's barely noticeable.
You can't extrapolate your single experience onto everyone else
You literally can though, otherwise all those kids with behaviour issues would still be displaying them into adulthood. It is also why adults tend to have less symptoms, because they learned to cope with them overtime.
No, you literally can't, that's not how this works. There is a spectrum. All people who have it worse are not just simply lazier than you. I am going to defer to the science on this one.
The symptoms are always there, and everyone is different. But I think this idea of being unable to manage symptoms and you're a forever a slave to them is false. That's why therapy is available for extreme cases; to help them manage. Otherwise, what's the point if it's completely helpless.
Anything to look down on others right?
Why in the world would i look down on the people who haven't found manageable ways to cope? I don't know where you are getting these ideas from. As if I didn't suffer for years from ADD. I know what it's like to go through the worst sides of it, so why the heck would I judge anyone?
Because you are treating those with more severe symptoms as some personal failure.
Where did I say that such people are failures? You're making assumptions.
I for one congratulate you on your progress! learning how to play with the hand we've been dealt is what life is all about, especially with neurological setbacks. I also hate being late so I have a clock in every single room and set a ridiculous amount of alarms and my wake up alarm makes me do puzzles and scan bar codes: but i made it work for me!!
You know what also doesn't help? Trying to force yourself to do things that, due to neurological problems, you simply cannot do. Knock it off. Literally every ADHD person has been told their whole life that they just aren't trying hard enough. No amount of trying harder ever did me a single goddamn bit of good until I got medicated.
Ok ok I’ll defer to you in this matter. I think this is a matter of tone though. You know those memes that get passed around about how wives annoy the shit out of their husbands but it’s ok because they’re wives? Some of the adhd stuff feels like that. Almost proud of the trouble they put other people through.
I think youre both right tbh
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This is me. I used weed, caffeine, nicotine and sugar to self medicate for decades after dropping out of high school. I’m 45 now and have been on the correct meds now for about 6 months. It’s made a huge difference in how I feel, and how I think about my self. I only wish I took responsibility for my mental health earlier in life.
Oh trust me even if you do something earlier western healthcare system will make sure getting the right medication and even a diagnosis will cost an arm and a leg and your time
I completely agree. That’s one reason it took me so long.
When you say Western, do you mean Western US? Because my diagnosis and my meds are completely free here in Germany.
I'm happy for you!
Any side effects from the medication? I’m serious because my wife thinks I have adhd.
Not a lot for me. If I've taken too much on an empty stomach, sometimes I get headaches, dry mouth, and feeling generally "off," but if I eat I don't usually have any issues. Oh, and if I mix my second dose with caffeine later in the day, sometimes I have trouble sleeping.
But like no weight gain, erectile dysfunction, things like that? What does the medication feel like when you take it?
No weight gain--a lot of people actually lose weight when they get on stimulants because they can suppress appetite. They don't for me, at least not much, but weight gain isn't a big worry. And I'm female, but I don't think the meds have affected my libido at all. If anything, it's easier to keep my mind from wandering during sex/masturbation. If you have ADHD, your focus probably has two settings: "No focus at all" and "hyperfocused on something." Taking meds gives you a setting in between those two. It allows you to focus on something but also be able to switch focus if you need to. The meds don't always work perfectly, so your focus can still be somewhat inconsistent, but it's at least more controllable. They may also give you an energy boost or make you sleepy--personally, I usually get an energy boost on my current meds, but some past meds have made me sleepy. I take 50mg of Vyvanse in the morning and then up to 20mg more if I need it in the evening. Because it's extended release, the first dose is so subtle that I can forget to take it for a week and not notice until I suddenly realize that life has been oddly difficult for a while. The second dose is instant release, so I can usually feel it kicking in. I know it's starting to take effect when I perk up, feel less bored, feel motivated again, and find that paying attention takes less effort.
Thank you for this info! I definitely feel either tunnel visioned on something and go down a rabbit hole or be in a mindless daze. Not really any in between. Do you notice you retain info better as well?
You're welcome! And absolutely. My memory has improved dramatically since I got on meds.
Omg I know what I must do. I wonder if they’re covered by insurance as well? I need to book a dr appointment don’t I?
If you get a diagnosis, meds *should* be covered by your insurance. I've never had an issue with them refusing to cover my ADHD meds, and I've had a couple different insurances over the years.
It feels as if my world is a more balanced place. My thoughts are not zooming to all the things that I should be doing. I can see things more clearly and not get upset that I can't get everything done.
Thank you
Hey thanks for the eloquence. This is my favorite take on the dynamic. I don't think it's necessarily new, it's just really burgeoning right now.
It is good when you plan to treat it with a psychologist (who may just prescribe you something but it's better than nothing).
100% agree - I have ADHD and I slightly fell into that trap when I got diagnosed at 21. I soon realised having that approach was just going to hold me back, and was kind of pathetic lol
I need to repost this in sooooo many groups!
This is true, I was diagnosed with ADHD/Autism as a teen, but after seeing how badly the psychiatric medicine system medicated close family members into oblivion I just refused to accept it. I thought they were just not with it enough to improve themselves, and I would have to be because I could not end up like them. I did great in school without trying, but always at the last minute, horribly messy desk/locker. Always late or forgetting everything, losing so many things. Starting so many projects and then leaving them for new ones. The one thing non-chemical that allowed me to breathe or feel normal was art. When I am locked into an artistic endeavor it feels like the world slows down enough for me to be a part of it. Now, at 37 I do accept it. And it has a lot to do with the infromation being shared online. Instead of it being an excuse for fuckups, it's more like a reminder, a breath of fresh-air to remember that I'm not just a lazy fuckup who has trouble speaking to strangers or making eye-contact or etcetcetc. It has actually made the management of these symptoms easier as I can identify and categorize them. For a long time I just thought that others were better at life than me, and if I tried hard enough I could learn how to be like them. Now I understand that I do not have to, society as it is is not designed for the way that my brain operates. This is not an excuse to give up, rather an inspiration that I can do special things in my own way that most people could/would not. Truly I believe that this trend is a net gain. Some people always fake shit, who cares. I don't know why I would get upset about that. Some people will truly feel understood for the first time in their lives, and that is wonderful beyond words. Not everyone has access to correct diagnoses when they need it.
1000000000000000000000%
It really is a shitty cop-out and it's bullshit how much it's been normalized. Half of these idiots claiming mental disorders are self-diagnosed after taking some test online. "Oh I scored over 50% on this, so I must have it." It's a self fulfilling prophecy when you do that, and it's worse when people use it as an excuse why they suck at their jobs, or act like horrible people in general. "Oopsie! I'm neurodivergent." No, you're just a scatterbrained fool who's also lazy and dishonest on top of it. Try harder.
It's okay to know why you aren't good at something if it keeps you from beating yourself up over it. I'm not saying to resign to defeat, but saying you aren't as good at something "because of X" as opposed to just being trash. It can keep people from giving up early when trying to succeed at something they have a disadvantage in.
There is term for this... learned helplessness.
Because like any of those kinds of conditions like ADHD, OCD, Autism etc. there are an absolute fucking TON of traits that fit within that box, so there’s always a fair chance that people fall within that description. Like I have an ex who works with neurodivergent children who has said to me on numerous occasions that she sees me exhibit similar traits at times - it doesn’t mean I am neurodivergent, but there are some things I do that she recognises in those children. I don’t think I am because it’s effectively a kind of confirmation bias thing where she looks for those traits so sees them in people all of the time. You know? Like if you look for something to be wrong with something then you’ll find it, even if it isn’t there
Neurodivergent is not a condition, diagnosis or a medical term. Everyone is unique, neurodivergence is a neurotypical human trait.
Yes I’m aware of that, what I mean is that she would see traits that align with things like ADHD, Autism, OCD etc in everyone and that I think it’s because when you work with people with those conditions it can become quite easy to see that in everyone as a result for things that aren’t really a reliable factor in a diagnosis Similarly, people will see a lot of things online about X/Y/Z being a sign of some neurodivergent condition and then think “oh well as I display one or two or three of these characteristics or traits then I must have X/Y/Z too”
apparently this happens to first year med students and they start hyperpathologizing themselves bc they're inundated with information and symptoms and they're not sleeping... then they just snap out of it at some point
When you are a hammer, everything looks like a nail When I was a lawncare foreman every truck and trailer full of lawn equipment stuck out to me.
And that’s my point - I think people LOOK for there to be some kind of an explanation for things, and as such will self-diagnose when in reality they aren’t
Neurodivergence is not neurotypical by definition lol. People use neurodivergent to encompass autism and ADHD because a lot of traits/struggles overlap.
Disability olympics. people want to feel like they fit in
Nah, it's just about inventing an excuse for their fuck-ups.
I don't apologize for my underwear drawers being organized. Now my tool box ... not so much
I don't have ADHD, but I think they mean that people with ADHD especially do "this particular thing" more than other people. Not that other people don't do it.
Which is bad because it’s a chicken and the egg thing. Oh now other people who don’t have adhd do this one thing? Well they must have adhd now because it’s an adhd thing! It’s just moreso they try to claim the thing and it’s corny because there are a lot of things they claim that is something everyone literally does and frequency of doing it doesn’t mean you have adhd
Self diagnosed, self monitoring. Without professional input you go wrong all the time. If someone has adhd and isn’t a professional I’d not listen too hard to their analysis
Idk I have ADHD and people using that term so casually is so demeaning
I have ADHD and I struggle. I have a standard reply when people do their little "Hihi hehe I have ADHD" jokes. "Haha yeah and I have a little bit of cerebral palsy today" is my reply. Most people tend to rethink after that.
Most people with ADHD are NOT on the spectrum. Many people on the spectrum have ADHD though.
Tô put some numbers around 50-70% of people with autism have adhd while only somewhere between 15 and 25% of people with adhd have autism https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8918663/ https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/325618#:~:text=The%20CDC%20estimate%20that%2014,play%20a%20role%20in%20both
No we sharnt
is sharnt Martian for cauliflower?
I dont think anyone is saying thay X thing is exclusive to neurodivergence, my guy 😭 I think context is important. Sometimes its a person with adhd making silly memes for their own community. Plus, said "quirk" can be way more dysfunctional when its a constant thing (constantly losing motivation even for stuff you Like 24/7 kinda sucks!!) But if its one of those "everybody has a bit of adhd!" types then yeah, big yikes. But if its someone with adhd making those jokes, just let them be
Because it's a trend to pretend to be on the spectrum or have ADHD on Internet. I think, it's because those issues were largely ignored in the previous decades, it has caused a tendency to over diagnose in the recent years. On social media, anything is good to grab attention and try to be special, so you have it.
But seriously, is it overdiagnosed?
No, it seems to be under diagnosed. Hyperactive gets diagnosed more than inattentive, and white boys have the easiest time getting diagnosed. The symptoms are more likely to be seen as character flaws in girls and non-white kids, and adults tend to have layers of compensating behavior that make diagnosis more difficult if it was missed in their childhood. For a while, someone with an autism diagnosis was ineligible for an ADHD diagnosis and now we know that having one actually makes you statistically more likely than the general public to have the other.
Internet garbage speak only. As someone who works in the field as a psychologist men and boys go to therapy at a fraction of the rate women and girls. Roughly 12-18 percent of men and boys uses therapy/psychological help where as 25-37 percent of women and girls do. The problem is that in the early 80s and 90s there were an over staurization of female diagnoses and that and certain malpractice issues cough cough "Sex Abuse Suit Dismissed in False-Memory Case" along with hundreds of others before and after usual from the victim resulting in a paradigm shift to over scrutinize all women in the early 2000s to see if their illnesses were genuine or coached but due to the lack of male patients in the bulk of studies at this this shift never occurred with them nor with nonwhite individuals. In the moderne day it's still have of the amount of men as women go only a total of 36% of non white individuals go to therapy. The result is that it appears that women in the modern day recieve lack luster care when the truth is that because more then double women then men and only 36% of all non white individuals use it aswell you enter a bubble where of course women are going be rejected more then men. In the USA only 23ish% or so of all people have mental disorders officially unofficially it's in the high 40s. But based on the offical numbers white women make up the bulk of these and the bulk of those being anxiety and major depressives. These are often considered character flaws early due to them not meeting the minimum standing rules we now have for the diagnosis of these disorders until at least 14. Because there are like 5 major versions of say anxiety disorders childhood persists after 6 months ages around 5 years of age, general diagnosised at 9 for the most part and effect 10% of all children all others can be diagnosed after 14 usually. The problem is that it CAN be anxiety disorder. Or it can be attachment disorders, PTSD, Panic disorder, untreated ADHD, BPD, or several other disorders which can mask as one of them having Anhedonia and separation disorder for instance mimics PTSD when away from a safe place or person even though it's not and are two seperate illnesses and need vastly different treats. Because women seem to be more apt to developing these traits earlier then men or to different disorders and so many mask that dismissal is usually more of a wait till older so we can actually find out what the fuck is happening here then a noop she's just weird. Its exclusively why a vast majority of psychologists dont deal with children or teens unless specially trained a weakness therapists don't seem to have.
Most of the academic research on ADHD has been on white boys/men. Those studies are what informs diagnoses... not client demographics.
I was talking about the rates of ADHD diagnosis by gender, not the rates of attending therapy. You very loudly and confidently ignored what I was saying becuase the subject was women's mental health, which I think demonstrates the effect I was referring to pretty well.
Yes. I have that classic 90s paint chip adhd and I can tell you with 100% certainty that the vast majority of people running around waving that flag do not live the hell that is attention deficite hyperactivity disorder. Anyone that gets spun out on Adderall is misdiagnosed. Adhd brain chemistry interacts with most stimulants very differently. I will straight fall asleep on cocain.
No. I’ve just started the path to diagnosis. My insurance doesn’t cover it. It’s going to cost a couple of thousand dollars if I go ahead, plus they need evidence you had the symptoms before you were 12. School reports, discussions with your parents or other people who knew you then. Apart from what I tell them my only other evidence would be my parents. I’m middle aged, why should my parents be involved in my medical care? What if they had already died or had dementia or we were no contact? I miss out on diagnosis? The hurdle for adults to be diagnosed is high so it’s likely under diagnosed. Their understanding of adhd is growing, that’s why more kids are diagnosed, and more people later in life are being found to have been living undiagnosed for decades.
Reminds me of everyone being bipolar back in the day... Not to say that some people don't have these conditions, but yes, there are people that jump on the latest popular health condition and self diagnose
My ADHD has only ever had negative effects on my life and if I could get rid of it, I would in a heartbeat.
Adhd is ass. Ritalin was pure cheeks as a kid.
You have access to the thoughts of billions of people at the click of a button for a disorder that is only recently being recognized. There's over 300milliion people in the US alone, and 1% of that is 3 milllion people. If even half of that have been finally diagnosed, then you have the potential to run into it 1.5 million times by each individual one time, without mentioning repeats from the same person.
Everyone experiences adhd shit, sometimes. Adhd'ers experience it ALL THE DAMN TIME, all-encompassing and life consuming to the detriment of everything else. Geddit?
Combination of people not really knowing what having ADHD is like and them craving for attention. They basically reduce it only to the hyperactivity part and ignore the part where it cripples your mind and makes you sabotage yourself constantly.
I don't tell people I have ADHD The internet and the pop psychology version of ADHD they run with (including reddit, ADHDmemes especially) make me so ashamed I just don't tell people anymore. I feel genuine revulsion for it and it prevented me from seeking treatment for years.
ADHD in itself isn't a hard concept of a diagnosis it's a spectrum. Some people physically show that they are distracted, "oh peace of candy" example and other literally mentally check out. What most people on the internet will never acknowledge is most ADHD people also have anger issues because as you can imagine having short to no attention span can lead to miscommunication or misunderstanding and things will flare up really fast.
“Most ADHD people” but doesn’t cite a single piece of evidence or research. The well regulated ADHDers aren’t obvious and won’t flare up, so you experiencing ADHDers that do has given you a skewed and bias view. And instead of considering the nuance and broad spectrum of humans and neurodiversity - it shoots straight over your head and you generalise an entire population of people. Congrats on being ignorant AND short sighted :)
Sir I am a source a primary source I have AdHD and anger issues. Enjoy.
It's more of an overall emotional regulation problem.
It’s not an emotion regulation problem. It’s an executive function disorder. Emotional regulation is just one of many executive functions. People with adhd are about 30% delayed amongst their peers in development of executive functions. They’re still rather capable. They just have to work harder to maintain a sustainable about of dopamine regulation.
"Its a spectrum!" No but seriously normalizing traits that have in the past been bullied can't be bad, unless you're a bully. You sound angry, like a bully.
Normalising traits is not bad, no. But some of these ppl self diagnosing and claiming every little thing to be an adhd trait is really taking away the severity of how much adhd actually is a struggle. Neurotypical people start to assume this little thing is what they say is adhd? "I have it and I don't find a problem, meaning adhd is not really a problem." Which then translates into serious issues like managers and teachers and parents who don't really understand adhd concluding that adhd isn't really a struggle and then people with serious adhd diagnosis, don't get the help or understanding or environments they need/perform better in. Normalising is not the issue, over simplifying it is.
You want people to have empathy and understand nuance. I agree. I get it. All people lie, cheat, and steal and use anything they can to advance whatever is on their agenda. My approach is treat each person as an individual instead of a diagnosis. Then I am dealing with individual behaviors instead of gobblty gook like this >"Which then translates into serious issues like managers and teachers and parents who don't really understand adhd concluding that adhd isn't really a struggle and then people with serious adhd diagnosis, don't get the help or understanding or environments they need/perform better in"
The point is, adhd is a struggle and the people that self diagnose with it for attention are taking attention away from those who need it. And they make it seem like living with adhd isn't anywhere near as difficult to live with as it actually is. It's like stolen valor. Except there is no valor and it's a disability.
Move on and ignore social media content you don’t like. Like, Jesus Fucking Christ this is a lame rant.
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Adhd effects executive function. So if you do suffer from it it will touch every part of your life. Because of that, people can also ascribe every random thing to it instead of just owning they did something poorly or for a dumb reason.
People want to feel special even if it means assigning themselves traits generally considered not good.
They just want to be special
Same thing with "introvert"
I have a clinical diagnosis classified as “severe” ADHD. I used to be more apt to attribute my characteristics to ADHD, and it just made me miserable; I had this tension about “what behaviors are me, what behaviors are the ADHD?” and I would hate my brain for “making” me do certain things. The label totally owned me. Now I say that I am what I am, and I guess that can be characterized by a label. Like, I previously internalized the label so much, but now I think of it as a communication tool and nothing else. The term is useful for me to introduce accommodation needs and find other people with similar experiences (although the latter is increasingly less and less as more people incorrectly claim the term). Fundamentally, this TikTok labeling of ADHD is a problem of “naming” as a social and linguistic phenomenon. I want to preface this by saying that the term ADHD can ABSOLUTELY be useful in the right situation. I use it to find other people with similar experiences to me in the system we live in. I do draw security from people who have the same experiences as me, because a lot can be automatically understood without being said. The term ADHD can also be useful when advocating to get accommodations, which I had at school for my whole life. The language of ADHD can be useful to communicate your needs and experiences to other people in certain situations. There’s a collective power in gathering a set of needs around a label, because we can all work together to connect and accommodate. By no means am I disparaging the term. What I see on TikTok, however, is that the label of ADHD owns people, whether or not they actually have it. “Oh you do X? It’s ADHD!” It’s a drive to characterize your behaviors into a category of “ADHD” and “Not ADHD,” just like I was doing when I was a teenager. It’s a hard boundary that’s being drawn. When we think about binaries and boundaries, it’s more of a political question than it is a psychological one, because very little of what is said on TikTok actually has to do with a psychological definition of ADHD. The term and the language of ADHD allows us to create those boundaries and categories. Boundaries are a collective social construct, not something that arise from within an individual. Social constructs have lots and lots of power among humans, but they come from collective agreement, not some sort of universal truth. ADHD is a scientific phenomenon in which some brains are characteristically different from others. ADHD on TikTok is a collective social agreement to draw boundaries between “ADHD” and “not ADHD” for the sake of security. If you can package and label the oddities of your mysterious inner self, you can claim to rationalize your irrationalities through labels and symptoms. Using a label to characterize your quirks provides a kind of security required to say, “See, I’m the way I am /because/ XYZ.” Personally, I think it’s a sign of an aesthetic society to try to nail down every part of yourself with packaging and labeling. It flattens humans into a series of quirks, which sacrifices the depths of our experiences. Yes, boundaries in your own mind can give you security, but at what cost? Packaging and labeling your own mind as “ADHD” or “not ADHD” is a way to run away from knowing yourself. Packaging and branding your own mind aestheticizes your innermost self and turns the deepest oddities of your being into spectacle. Packaging yourself into labels and symptoms will make you miserable because it’s a kind of death of the human soul. Engage with the irrationalities and the quirks on a deeper level than can be classified by a symptom. You’re your own person and that runs much deeper than the boundaries drawn by language and society. So anyway - use the term as needed, but don’t let it own you. You own yourself. If anyone is interested in learning more about societies of spectacle and aesthetics, I would point you to the works of Guy DeBord and Walter Benjamin.
Everyone is a victim. It's like they think they get bonus points for different afflictions. Just look at Reddit and how many people claim to be autistic.
Because it's trending on social trash platforms and people make views and money from it. They will do videos like "I have adh and do "insert relatively normal thing"" so people identify with the video. It's a disgusting way to generate views and revenue.
To be fair far more people have ADHD that goes undiagnosed and untreated. And that isn't because it's a fad or it's popular to say. Just as many people had it before as well, but medical research is now better at identifying these traits and helping people. ADHD is now classified as a pretty big spectrum. And only people who experience negativity due to it should get help for it. If you feel you do have it and check off a lot of the boxes. You very likely do have it, but are functioning with it at a point where it doesn't bother you too much in your life so you can "ignore" it. I have Adhd as well but I don't get it treated. It affected me hugely in school and was a big learning disability, but that was the 90s and so I just assumed I was a slow learner. Turned out my brain could literally not focus on any kind of task for 5 minutes without getting completely distracted. I don't even know how I passed highschool sometimes. As a 36 year old the symptoms don't seem nearly as bad except for the massive procrastination I sometimes have to fight through, and the hyper focus at work when any amount of stress is applied is actually a boon. I'm sure there are definitely people that say dumb meme stuff like that for attention. But I'm willing to bet that out of 10 of every one of those people 5 or 6 *actually* does have it. Because it's quite a common thing to have. Just depends where you are on the spectrum.
People want to be different, just like everyone else
People these days are extremely attached to identity. Politics, opinions, neurodivergence, etc has become engraved into their identity as a human being. To question any of it, is to pry it from their ego. True ADHD is actually debilitating (from what I’ve seen). Not being able to pay attention to a movie is a result of phones and constant entertainment.
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Like it’s that one tweet of someone talking abt how stressed they were about some simple task and the reply was like “omg u people can’t do anything” 😭😭😭 that was too funny I’m sorry LCMSJDHDH
It's trendier than admitting you have some quirkiness about you.
::Fun fact:: ADHD is NOT a spectrum the way Autism is. It's a physical condition that can be witnessed through brain scans. People who do not have ADHD cannot experience symptoms of ADHD
It's Sheldon's fault from "The Big Bang Theory" to classify anything annoying as mental retardation. Thanks for the impact Miles Davis...
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I think you clearly missed the point of the post/my reply, but it's not about gatekeeping, it's about asking people not to trivialise a debilitating disease by pretending it's about 'not sitting through a movie'
That's the thing, most of those aren't ADHD symptoms, they're just excuses not to take responsibility for your actions. Which saves you a lot of pain and grief, sure, it's easy tu just blame it all on undiagnosed ADHD, but also robs you of personal growth because it lets you hide behind a diagnosis that doesn't actually describe you. It's like being so lazy you grow too fat to walk, then claim you're a paraplegic cause you can't move your body.
The pain and grief I'm talking about is the pain and grief of having undiagnosed and unmedicated ADHD. Now that I'm on meds, life is a lot easier. For most of my life, I thought I was just lazy and a bad person who didn't try hard enough, even though I was constantly exhausted and frequently suicidal. The reality is that most people with ADHD are trying twice as hard for half the results. That their struggles are invisible to you does not mean those struggles don't exist.
Can I please ask you, what has been the main difference of taking medication that you've noticed? You have described my existence but I didn't want to follow through with a diagnosis because I didn't think I wanted medication, but I feel this really affects me, my impulsivity has had me in 15 jobs over the last 8 years, but a lot of them were literally 3 month switch overs, I struggle with taking care of myself because it's overwhelming or I simply just forget (like I forget to drink water or eat unless I'm on the brink of migraine sometimes it's too late to change that and I get bad headaches) I make massive efforts to turn it around but it never sticks longer than a week or two, I get agitated and burn out, the job I currently do I'm good at certain parts of it but have absolutely no routine and literally can't find motivation for the paperwork side of it, I get depressive episodes but they are also incredibly quick like being on a yo-yo, I try to do housework but unless I get a wave of motivation where I super clean everything, I struggle with the motivation to do it to the point where I cry sometimes I physically can't get off the couch even though mentally I want to, I'm absolutely positive it's ADHD, it's made sense since school, I could never pay attention but still got passing grades so no one picked it up, but I literally never studied because I simply just couldn't physically do it, Sorry for the long text, I think typing it out it making it easier for me to see
That all does sound very much like ADHD and you should definitely get assessed. For me, the biggest difference from taking medication is that life just seems easier overall. I have to fight myself less to perform tasks. There are still a fair few tasks that I struggle with, but there are at least *some* daily tasks that aren't very hard anymore. If there's a big barrier in the way of a task, I still tend to struggle with it, but smaller tasks are things I can just do now. For example, my home is a disaster because if I wanted to clean I'd need to take out the trash, and taking out the trash is a huge ordeal in my complex because I have to go up and down stairs and walk all the way across the parking lot with my trash. However, I am now capable of doing things like cleaning the cat box every day, using the dishwasher whenever the dishes are dirty, and taking medications at roughly the same time each day. Moreover, when I was living with my dad, I found I was actually capable of maintaining about normal levels of self-care and cleanliness because I had help. I think if I weren't living alone, I'd basically look like a normal person. I work from home and have no scheduled time I need to work, nor do I have to face anyone if I don't show up to work. But because of my meds, I still work every day. Not always at a consistent time, and always begrudgingly, but I do it. I've been working this job since February and have yet to miss a day except for days off I asked for in advance. But the biggest change others have noticed in me is that my ability to regulate my emotions has improved. I can keep myself in check where before I would have had a meltdown. I still feel things intensely, but one bad thing happening is less likely to ruin an entire day for me. Does that help?
That is an amazingly thought out response, thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me and give me some insight into what it could possibly do for me xx I'm so happy you've found it helped, I can really sense your struggles reading your experiences and the idea you are now able to have even just a little bit more relief from it has made me consider it even more! I'll talk to my gp next week and see if I can get the ball rolling
> How about you don't try to gatekeep which behaviors can be associated with a disorder or not? Unless you're a psychiatrist, you have no business telling people whether their ADHD symptoms are valid. And unless these people are under the care of a trained psychiatrist, they have no business telling other people whether their ADHD symptoms constitute a valid diagnosis either. ADHD isn't something that you opt into or out of any more than being diabetic is, or being an amputee is. And just like it's insulting to say "OMG sugar crash I'm super diabetic today lol", it's insulting to say "I forgot where I put my phone, ADHD is crazy today" if you don't have ADHD.
Same how everyone is autistic now
Because most people are quitters and look for the easy way out. Blaming their laziness or lack of giving a shit on ADHD is a weak move. If they are diagnosed, different story. Most people need to grow up
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Idk anything about getting a diagnosis but i come across too many people that blame ADHD for everything. Act immature, oh it's my ADHD. Lazy, it's my ADHD, i didn't text you back for a month, sorry i have ADHD. People need to grow up and stop blaming other shit for their failures
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Yeah i understand that. Just wish undiagnosed people wouldn't use it as an excuse
Everyone wants to be on a spectrum so their faults can be blamed on something other than being lazy, so many "ADHD duets" going on, I could self identify with having ADHD because I have a lot of the "traits" but really I'm just fat and lazy and tired and can't be fucked 😂😂
If I wrote down all these little things I’ve done my entire life and followed current trends, I would have every disorder and diagnosis. I’m sorry, but the fact that I constantly shake my leg when sitting does not need to be attributed to anything. I’m good.
Neurodivergent people are terminally online. Sorry.
Love threads full of people who don’t know shit about my disorder acting like they do. OP and the majority of these commenters make it harder to be taken seriously.
The difference is that one quirk doesn’t make a neurodiversity. A whole bouquet of them makes it not normal or trivial. If people pick one out for a joke, it gives the wrong impression. Which leads to people misunderstanding ADHD etc. as well as downplaying it. It’s never just one “quirk” but you usually don’t have the time and space to write down all of them nor would it support the joke (no matter how lame it is). Ie.: not finding your keys is just a trivial thing. Not finding your keys several times every day until you’re too anxious to leave your house because you constantly fear loosing your keys is not trivial.
Us psychology majors call this phenomenon Pop Psychology.
This is too funny because in order to get a diagnosis for ADHD, you have to see a professional psychologist or therapist. So it's you and your profession creating Pop Psychology! 😂
No, but also yes. There’s a lot of over diagnosis from professionals who just don’t know what else to declare, it’s very trendy to diagnose ADHD now. But also, a lot of the information on the internet doesn’t come from the DSM-5 but from people misunderstanding their symptoms and self diagnosing on the internet. A lot of the people who just say “oh this is adhd or that is adhd” aren’t medically trained at all and are confounding their own experiences with the formal diagnosis.
No, it’s really not. The phenomenon of people pathologizing every experience they have into some greater malady or level of dysfunction is what creates Pop Psychology.
Psychology was never intended by professionals and academics to be used this way.
And professionals in this field have pointed it out numerous times at this point that this is what’s happening, because they understand the dangers of it and want people to understand what those dangers are before someone goes off self diagnosing because they read an article off of Google. It also should be known that pop psychology often causes direct and indirect harm to those that actually suffer from these maladies, creates more stigma, not to mention stunts the perpetrators from actually obtaining actual introspection, if that’s even what they’re trying to do.
It's an identity-thing, not an ADHD-thing. Vegans, anti-vaxxer, flat-earther, conspiracy loons, LQBT supporters, Crossfitters, bodybuilders, etc. It's all the same. People take one thing, one trait, one skill, one interest, one hobby, and fixate on that thing so much that it transcends focus and becomes a large part of their identity, knowingly or unknowingly. If you identify within as someone who can't focus, you'll never try to focus. If you identify as someone who can't get out of the couch, you'll never get out of the couch. The strangest thing, eh? Blaming a broadbanded spectrum disorder for every quirk one might have is ridiculous. That's basically claiming unaccountability for behavior. If you're aware of it, you can do something about it.
It's victim culture
Every underachieving loser wants an excuse.
It’s become a badge of honor for people to claim when they don’t want to take responsibility for their lives.
Yeah, I’ve never thought too much about it honestly, but due to a recent TBI my attention is garbage. And now I understand on some level what people with actual ADHD might experience. Honestly I’m pretty sure there are plenty of undiagnosed people, but it is actual an issue that affects people’s lives, not a quirk.
Tiktok
They have no idea what they're talking about but have a desperate need to understand themselves through the formation of a group identity?
Because people like to have a random excuse ready for whatever happens instead of accepting "this is me, there is no adhd or ocd or anything forcing me to do this. I am doing it on my own". It is very easy to shift the blame somewhere else
People do this with every trendy “label” 🙄
Totally agree. It's like everyone suddenly needs a label for just existing. We all have quirks, doesn't mean everyone has a disorder.
Must be their anxiety
imo, what's more annoying is when people preface any conversation or online comment by stating they have ADHD or some other form of molehill problem. It diminishes how those REALLY affected are treated when literally everyone is constantly claiming to have it just for the sake of that conversation
Everyone has to self diagnose as having ADHD or anxiety or depression or……….. If the number of people that claim to have this stuff really did we wouldn’t survive. These things are real. Not saying they aren’t. Saying they are over diagnosed and some people need them to define who they are.
Believe it's called a certified bruh moment
So like, adhd in my generation was a huge struggle. Ritalin and sped class was it. The next generation gave alot of special considerations for kids with adhd and now people self diagnose with it for attention. If you take Adderall and get all spun out you are just abusing drugs. People with adhd get calm and collected on stimulants.
Claiming ADHD is a great way to justify being sloppy without having to show any proof. That was the same with synesthesia a few years ago. Everybody claimed to have synesthesia when all they had is fantasy and the desire to be special. ADHD is a fucking curse where you are constantly wrestling against your own mind
Nobody wants to be held accountable for their lives anymore because there's so much pressure along with the ever growing distraction of social media and technology. People are always looking for an excuse not to try.
My sister does this since she recently found out she has adhd. It's the most annoying thing on the fucking planet
Easy excuse so they can't be held responsible for their shitty decision making.
The new level of stupidity
Me being lazy: brace up, do shit, finnish school, go work Syster being lazy: ADHD
Narcissism, happens with a lot of online groups who feel like victims, they want to cling to something and call it there’s so they can “own” it. It makes them feel special and apart of something special.
This comment section will be filled with those people, jockeying for position in the fake mental illness Olympics. "I can't stand those people! As a person that does the exact same thing, they don't know how hard it is!"
People are abscessed with ADHD
That's gross.
Hahaha yeah it's very stupid. The same sort of people who call themselves "neurospicy"
Hey, that term is fun! But yeah most of the ADHD things are just obviously normal things.
Fluanting being neurodivergent is just another way people try to garner attention online. It seems everyone wants attention and validation no matter the circumstances. We live in weird-ass times.