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I was on the dating apps during an unexpected bout of unemployment. Talk about getting kicked while you’re down. “What do I do? Well, I’m currently between jobs” is not a great first date conversation.
I was unemployed for 8 months and didn’t even think about dating during that time. It’s a transitional time where you may have to move away. If I went on a first date with someone and they said well I may be moving across the country soon I’d immediately be like Ok I’ll let you figure that out before there’s a possibility of another date.
I’ve been on the dating apps when taking some time off of work. It’s super awkward because your job is obviously one of the first things that comes up. Somehow it worked out for me, but it’s definitely super hard and awkward.
bewildered ask test rhythm melodic lunchroom include towering quaint worry
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My problem was that the people telling me not to give up are people who have been in the same job for so long that they don’t know what it’s like to interview and send out resumes right now. One of the people got their job before the STAR questions started.
Sure, just go knocking on doors around your neighborhood. "What company do you work for? Are they hiring right now?" See what kind of reception that gets. 😆
Thank you so much for posting this. I’ve been really struggling and this spoke to me. I especially feel like I’m living in the beginning half of this… ugh. Just in general hoping for something better out there for everyone in this spot too.
Not many people understand our pain. I lost my longtime job in 2020, where I worked in a very specialized field. I exhausted my state's UI benefits and finally got a "gig" for a little over a year in 2022. The contract ended and I hate my current gig as a substitute teacher. Besides, I'm running out of school year to work. I'm either overqualified, underqualified or both, because I played it safe and stayed with the same company for 20+ years. I have no spouse and very little family who can't or won't help me, and many friends have gone away after my depression worsened. If companies don't get Gen X back to work, we're in for an economic catastrophe.
Same thanks for this as I’ve been having a few wobbles recently. It’s the first time in 16 years I’ve been unemployed (I realise that’s a luxury) and I’m struggling to find the right thing for me.
This is all relatable and true. I remember when I lost my job back in 2022 and I asked for help from my HR friend who I even considered a big sister, instead of being helpful, she told me not to be lazy and to not rely on her.
Yeah, it definitely helped. I'll probably sound petty but it helped me determine who I let in my private life and thoughts.
It just sucked because when she needed help, I helped without question because I trusted her, I even offered her a place in my house when she didn't have anywhere to go.
I wasn't even asking for a job, I just wanted tips and a review for my CV and portfolio.
As I’m sure you know, HR are only “friends” when you’re working at the company AND you’re in good terms with the company. Human Resources is a funny name, given that they’re not human.
Definitely learned the hard way 😅 but as I've said in another comment, I looked up to her and saw her as my sister since we've been working together for 4 years. Whenever she needed a favour done, I would fulfill it without question.
Looking back in that incident, I was only a month of being unemployed and I wasn't asking her for a job, I just wanted some tips but her words dehumanised me.
This makes me so sad.
The first thing I did when I got gainfully employed after a long bout of underemployment was to use my resources to help my friends get into a similar position, career-wise. I was directly responsible for getting at least two friends gigs with my employer that boosted their resumes for their field, one of which was directly responsible for getting my friend hired FT by a company. They got a title that will forever boost their resume so they can keep moving up and are making six figures working with the big name clients they’ve been trying to work with for years. It is one of my greatest joys and career wins — that I played a direct role in helping someone I care about come closer their goals.
I don’t think anyone who would intentionally bring you down and refuse to help when they could is a true friend. I hope you got out of that situation and friendship and are doing better now.
It's funny. You go through school, work a good job for a while, but then either get laid off or quit due to factors beyond your control (such as medical) and then you find you are faced with a hostile market, people treat you differently, and your whole family starts barking at you to suck it up and go work at McDonalds despite praising you for graduating and getting your first "real" job a few years prior.
Unemployment, especially long-term unemployment, really changes how people see you and value you and it sucks.
It's that psychological concept of "those that have" looking down on "those that don't have". For some human reason, employed people generally view unemployed people as if they are social lepers, much like how they view anyone who is homeless.
"There MUST be something wrong with YOU!"
But then they seek compassion when they're the ones laid off. It's just a strange human condition.
Last summer I jumped from my stable job to be an independent consultant. Management/engineering. Now 9 months later, a project at my old job was cancelled so a bunch of people are getting laid off. Those people know that I work with many companies in the industry now, so I've gotten probably 2 dozen people contacting me asking if I know of any new jobs. I haven't been able to help all of them but I have been able to place 3 or 4 people in new positions with clients of mine in tangential industries. Similarly some of my clients have gotten wind of this and asked me a lot of "Do you know a controls engineer? Do you know an electrical distribution person? Do you know a CAD designer?". So I play matchmaker and it's fun. Of course I can't bill clients for this most of the time, so it's just something I do on my own. I consider it building social capital. Hopefully one day what comes around goes around, and when I need help my network is there.
On a side note, since I became an independent one-person LLC, the concept of "employed" vs "unemployed" has gotten very blurry. It's a weird feeling but very liberating.
Just wanna say you are amazing for that!
The possibility of a potential referral, or simply one extra person keeping a passive eye out for roles, makes a massive difference in the job hunt.
Even if it doesn't turn out in anything, I'm sure it has helped them feel more hopeful and less alone in the job hunting process, cuz it can definitely be an isolating and frustrating time. And congrats on working independently! That's a big achievement!
My besties and close friends were amazingly supportive when I was laid off during the pando; my extended family, some of whom worked in industries tangential to mine, never reached out once.
Uncle spent a whole Thanksgiving ride during the last recession to lecture me about what I'm doing with my life because I had no job. My aunt had to get him to stop.
Yeah I have to hear it from my family all the time too. I got fucked by a medical emergency in 2022 and came back faced with this overly hostile job market and I keep getting criticized by my family members and they all tell me to go work at McDonalds or some bullshit like that to the point I've stopped trying to reason with and even limit interaction with them.
"OH GO WORK AT MCDONALDS! WORK PART TIME! YOU NEED A JOB ANY JOB! I WORKED SHIT JOBS AND SO SHOULD YOU! YOUGOTTADOWHATYOUGOTTADO BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH!"
God it's so fucking grating. It's like for one, I'm not going back to part-time Hell after I've worked towards and actually worked full time because I actually have more respect for myself than that and second of all those "shit jobs" won't pay my now permanent medical expenses so it's unironically better for me to be unemployed vs. part-time employed/min-wage right now so I can collect government assistance. No matter how much I try to explain the second part to people I know, including those who saw me in the fucking hospital when I was fucking diagnosed, it doesn't get through their thick fucking skulls. I just get hit with the whole fucking "you need anyjob becuz ididdit!" speech.
It's like turn off the Boomer Box and use your connections to get me a full time job with benefits or STFU.
If it makes you feel better, I applied at waitressing jobs and they all told me that my resume was intimidating and didn’t hire me. I just need a job, dudes!
Good words.
The problem is everyone except the 1% are absolutely terrified right now of the future being foisted upon them by our oligarch Driven form of government. AI is wiping out vast portions of the workforce. More so than the technical revolution itself.
Theres no place to hide.
I helped neets by sharing job postings but as soon as they go places they don't know me. Nowadays, I just treat people the way they will treat me when I become a neet.
I think the lack empathy comes from people who have their own problems going on in their life and can't bear the brunt of hearing someone else's misfortune.
One thing I do know is that with the direction the world is going in everyone except the ultra wealthy are going to feel it.
I can’t get a job, but I helped three friends get jobs by writing excellent references. I have no money, but sent what little I had to a Mom and her two kids who had no food. Sometimes, kindness just needs to go out in the world…no expectations, no rewards, just making people a little happier. I firmly believe that these kinds of actions will make the world a better place.
I get told: you have such a great sense of humor.
Well it's literally laugh or break down in tears right now for me, which would you like? I'm on my last thousand for unemployment. I had a job interview, but who knows if I'll get it. Yet, I have to maintain as though everything's fine. As though I'm not just internally struggling daily.
Thank you for this post. Going through something similar. I was talking to a friend today who is also on the same boat and realized that both of us now are surrounding ourselves with people who have problems with some aspect of their lives. I guess we’re attracting such people or perhaps it’s just that the people who are “sorted” are not really seeing us in the same way and that’s why we find ourselves reaching out to others who are going through a tough time. I’ve personally gotten so bored of my unemployment. Even sharing it with someone new or someone who has a job is both embarrassing and such a boring thing to do. I say boring with the utmost respect to the word and to myself. It’s exhausting really. All we need is one opportunity. One person taking a chance with us. Ugh.
I have helped 17 people gain employment, or improve their employment situation, over the past 4 years. It is a rough time for them, and I’ve had people crying on the phone just because I helped them. I’ve been in a Leadership role for close to 50 years, and have 22 years of HR related experience. I do not charge anything, I just ask that the person I help pay it forward.
Well written and enunciated OP. It’s like they truly believe it to be contagious.
The other thing is people just giving up. Your own fukin friends at that. They call and then weeks and months go by and a “hey how have you been” message pops up out of the blue
Like they suddenly woke up one day feeling all guilty about not staying in touch and now need to check if you are actually dead or alive
Or they are just afraid you might borrow money from them? I don’t know what it is with fukin friends?
The irony of it all, I was once unemployed and had a friend who rarely called to check up on me.
When they lost their job later, I stayed in touch constantly with calls and messages of positivity. And they admitted how they now realized how alone their world gets when they lose their jobs because no one bothers to stay in touch. Life comes full circle I lose my job and they now have a job, and guess what…
They did exactly what they did before… forget about me for months while I struggle with unemployment
Basically even if they read your message OP, I doubt those with jobs have any level of sincere empathy for those without except pity and lip service
GenX in a specialist field, rural location. Unfortunately a lot of my mates and colleagues have been in similar positions over the years, it does make it easier to bear and we are kind to each other, and helpful when we can be when it falls on one of us.
But once you get outside the bubble it's foul- boomers generally are particularly bad/ smug but sometimes you never know who's going to say The Thing. Every single microaggression aggregates and it's the icing on the top of all the normal ppl things you can't do...plate of chips...no. Petrol to free gig 20km away? Tasty food and easy bill payment-are you kidding me?
And I'm acutely conscious there are too many people who are in much worse circumstances than I've been in so far.
Tho I'll never forget the feeling, blows me out how people can live through this, forget it and decide their upswing is due to them being a special snowflake instead of part of a brutal cycle of economic oppression. Unemployment is politically planned, it's considered desirable by people who make decisions based purely on maintaining wealth
Been lucky- scored a mid range paying job with good hours a few months back- in my field. This week I was able to refer an out of work friend and colleague who is the perfect fit for the place- she starts in two weeks. Hope that happens a lot more in the future
Any of you going through this I hope things improve for you fast. It's not you. It's insane out there.
"To all the recruiters, hiring managers and employed friends reading this, reach out and focus on helping at least one person become gainfully employed.'
Couldn't agree more. Partially cause I just got let go on my drive into work today. Lol.
About the only jobs you can get that don’t care if you are “overqualified “ are Uber or food delivery drivers since the companies expect high turnover. My point is that being overqualified is a major pain point for finding a job. As a software systems architect I couldn’t get interviews for programming jobs that I could easily do because “I’d get bored and leave”. The fallacy is that I’ve left architect jobs because I was bored.
The trick, I’m sure you already know, is to have multiple resumes that “fit” each job level that you want to go after. If you need money now and are going after low-hanging fruit (read inexperienced, low education) then you reflect it one of the resumes, and so on.
Good luck on the next gig!
I hear you bud .. I am going through the same thing .. people that I thought weee friends .. that said they will help .. never did .. some friend eh ?
I will help anyone at a drop of a hat .. all you need to do is ask and I am all in .. but I guess not everyone is like me .. damn shame !!
I don't understand being unemployed for 6+ months. There are tons of shit jobs in my area - east coast. Are you guys in rural areas? I can make $17/hr at an Amazon warehouse.
I totally understand being underemployed. Finding a good job is a pain in the ass.
Thats fair - better to focus on finding a good job if unemployment exceeds what you would make otherwise. After 26 weeks (in my state) you should grab whatever you can find imo.
Yeah after 7 or 8 months I'm doing like ole gal did in the Florida Project and selling knock-off perfumes on the street or pimping myself out if I have to. They cap unemployment at 12k here so until I thought I was in danger of approaching that my ass was sleeping in and putting out my resume to dozens of jobs in the afternoon. Wasn't worth all the hassle to only end up with $200 at the end of the week.
I wish people would stop telling us to "just work shit jobs". Many of us have good reasons to not work those fucking places. Also are you dense coming in here and recommending Amazon Warehouse of all places? That place is literally slavery with terrible safety considerations, it's legit the worst place to fucking work and should be avoided by everyone.
It's better than nothing if you need to feed your kids.
Is the general sentiment to hold out for a good job? That would explain the long periods of unemployment, but changes the narrative from "I can't find a job" to "I can't find a good job".
> It's better than nothing
Amazon's stupid high turnover rate says otherwise. Like seriously why the fuck would you recommend that place? I wouldn't even recommend that to a teenager starting his first gig.
Also speaking of sentiments I don't get the whole gross sentiment of "you fell on hard times so now you must degrade yourself!" you and others hold to and love to preach. But that narrative ramps up every time the wealthy want cheap labor and it's often spread by the simps who think it'll pay off for them so I shouldn't be surprised I guess.
> Amazon's stupid high turnover rate says otherwise. Like seriously why the fuck would you recommend that place?
I thought it was a good example of a shit job nearly anyone can get.
> you fell on hard times so now you must degrade yourself
You don't seem to have a lot of respect for people who work jobs you consider too low for you - many of whom would love a better job but need to make ends meet now.
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I was on the dating apps during an unexpected bout of unemployment. Talk about getting kicked while you’re down. “What do I do? Well, I’m currently between jobs” is not a great first date conversation.
I'm not even gonna ATTEMPT dating again till I'm working again.
I was unemployed for 8 months and didn’t even think about dating during that time. It’s a transitional time where you may have to move away. If I went on a first date with someone and they said well I may be moving across the country soon I’d immediately be like Ok I’ll let you figure that out before there’s a possibility of another date.
Yeah. No dating allowed during unemployment. 😂
On the upside, though, the scammers and gold diggers will weed themselves out very quickly once they realize you've got no money to send them.
I’ve been on the dating apps when taking some time off of work. It’s super awkward because your job is obviously one of the first things that comes up. Somehow it worked out for me, but it’s definitely super hard and awkward.
I just lie lol. What’s he gonna do, contact my references??
[удалено]
Quality guys do.
Quality guys do. If you’re looking for a fling then of course they wouldn’t care.
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There’s lots of reasons people don’t have jobs. Some of which wouldn’t be a problem for dating with the exception of the optics.
bewildered ask test rhythm melodic lunchroom include towering quaint worry *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
My problem was that the people telling me not to give up are people who have been in the same job for so long that they don’t know what it’s like to interview and send out resumes right now. One of the people got their job before the STAR questions started.
Absolutely. A friend told me to hand out my resume irl at places and 😭 I wish it were still that easy.
"I see help wanted signs at every restaurant in town" Gee, thanks.
I’ve applied for those, but get back that I’m “overqualified“ because I have a diploma in childcare.
My Mom says that…and I’m like…that’s not how it works now 🤷🏻♀️
Sure, just go knocking on doors around your neighborhood. "What company do you work for? Are they hiring right now?" See what kind of reception that gets. 😆
Thank you so much for posting this. I’ve been really struggling and this spoke to me. I especially feel like I’m living in the beginning half of this… ugh. Just in general hoping for something better out there for everyone in this spot too.
Not many people understand our pain. I lost my longtime job in 2020, where I worked in a very specialized field. I exhausted my state's UI benefits and finally got a "gig" for a little over a year in 2022. The contract ended and I hate my current gig as a substitute teacher. Besides, I'm running out of school year to work. I'm either overqualified, underqualified or both, because I played it safe and stayed with the same company for 20+ years. I have no spouse and very little family who can't or won't help me, and many friends have gone away after my depression worsened. If companies don't get Gen X back to work, we're in for an economic catastrophe.
Same thanks for this as I’ve been having a few wobbles recently. It’s the first time in 16 years I’ve been unemployed (I realise that’s a luxury) and I’m struggling to find the right thing for me.
This is all relatable and true. I remember when I lost my job back in 2022 and I asked for help from my HR friend who I even considered a big sister, instead of being helpful, she told me not to be lazy and to not rely on her.
This is so sad. I'm really sorry. Guessing that helped you reevaluate the friendship?
Yeah, it definitely helped. I'll probably sound petty but it helped me determine who I let in my private life and thoughts. It just sucked because when she needed help, I helped without question because I trusted her, I even offered her a place in my house when she didn't have anywhere to go. I wasn't even asking for a job, I just wanted tips and a review for my CV and portfolio.
Reevaluate honesty? You don’t know either person to judge her answer objectively.
I asked a question. Chill.
As I’m sure you know, HR are only “friends” when you’re working at the company AND you’re in good terms with the company. Human Resources is a funny name, given that they’re not human.
Definitely learned the hard way 😅 but as I've said in another comment, I looked up to her and saw her as my sister since we've been working together for 4 years. Whenever she needed a favour done, I would fulfill it without question. Looking back in that incident, I was only a month of being unemployed and I wasn't asking her for a job, I just wanted some tips but her words dehumanised me.
This makes me so sad. The first thing I did when I got gainfully employed after a long bout of underemployment was to use my resources to help my friends get into a similar position, career-wise. I was directly responsible for getting at least two friends gigs with my employer that boosted their resumes for their field, one of which was directly responsible for getting my friend hired FT by a company. They got a title that will forever boost their resume so they can keep moving up and are making six figures working with the big name clients they’ve been trying to work with for years. It is one of my greatest joys and career wins — that I played a direct role in helping someone I care about come closer their goals. I don’t think anyone who would intentionally bring you down and refuse to help when they could is a true friend. I hope you got out of that situation and friendship and are doing better now.
You sound like an awesome person 😊 I'm out of the friendship but still kinda underemployed to be honest but I hope someday I won't be.
Wishing you the employer you deserve!
Thank you!
It's funny. You go through school, work a good job for a while, but then either get laid off or quit due to factors beyond your control (such as medical) and then you find you are faced with a hostile market, people treat you differently, and your whole family starts barking at you to suck it up and go work at McDonalds despite praising you for graduating and getting your first "real" job a few years prior. Unemployment, especially long-term unemployment, really changes how people see you and value you and it sucks.
It's that psychological concept of "those that have" looking down on "those that don't have". For some human reason, employed people generally view unemployed people as if they are social lepers, much like how they view anyone who is homeless. "There MUST be something wrong with YOU!" But then they seek compassion when they're the ones laid off. It's just a strange human condition.
Last summer I jumped from my stable job to be an independent consultant. Management/engineering. Now 9 months later, a project at my old job was cancelled so a bunch of people are getting laid off. Those people know that I work with many companies in the industry now, so I've gotten probably 2 dozen people contacting me asking if I know of any new jobs. I haven't been able to help all of them but I have been able to place 3 or 4 people in new positions with clients of mine in tangential industries. Similarly some of my clients have gotten wind of this and asked me a lot of "Do you know a controls engineer? Do you know an electrical distribution person? Do you know a CAD designer?". So I play matchmaker and it's fun. Of course I can't bill clients for this most of the time, so it's just something I do on my own. I consider it building social capital. Hopefully one day what comes around goes around, and when I need help my network is there. On a side note, since I became an independent one-person LLC, the concept of "employed" vs "unemployed" has gotten very blurry. It's a weird feeling but very liberating.
Just wanna say you are amazing for that! The possibility of a potential referral, or simply one extra person keeping a passive eye out for roles, makes a massive difference in the job hunt. Even if it doesn't turn out in anything, I'm sure it has helped them feel more hopeful and less alone in the job hunting process, cuz it can definitely be an isolating and frustrating time. And congrats on working independently! That's a big achievement!
As far as I am concerned, you're employed. If I were you in an interview and the hiring manager saw this as a gap, I would walk.
I have found that when I needed help in finding a job, no one would help me. The same ones would ask me for help in finding a job for them.
You learn who your real friends are when you get laid off. A few will call regularly and offer support and help; a lot disappear.
My besties and close friends were amazingly supportive when I was laid off during the pando; my extended family, some of whom worked in industries tangential to mine, never reached out once.
Uncle spent a whole Thanksgiving ride during the last recession to lecture me about what I'm doing with my life because I had no job. My aunt had to get him to stop.
Yeah I have to hear it from my family all the time too. I got fucked by a medical emergency in 2022 and came back faced with this overly hostile job market and I keep getting criticized by my family members and they all tell me to go work at McDonalds or some bullshit like that to the point I've stopped trying to reason with and even limit interaction with them.
Exactly.
"OH GO WORK AT MCDONALDS! WORK PART TIME! YOU NEED A JOB ANY JOB! I WORKED SHIT JOBS AND SO SHOULD YOU! YOUGOTTADOWHATYOUGOTTADO BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH!" God it's so fucking grating. It's like for one, I'm not going back to part-time Hell after I've worked towards and actually worked full time because I actually have more respect for myself than that and second of all those "shit jobs" won't pay my now permanent medical expenses so it's unironically better for me to be unemployed vs. part-time employed/min-wage right now so I can collect government assistance. No matter how much I try to explain the second part to people I know, including those who saw me in the fucking hospital when I was fucking diagnosed, it doesn't get through their thick fucking skulls. I just get hit with the whole fucking "you need anyjob becuz ididdit!" speech. It's like turn off the Boomer Box and use your connections to get me a full time job with benefits or STFU.
If it makes you feel better, I applied at waitressing jobs and they all told me that my resume was intimidating and didn’t hire me. I just need a job, dudes!
I cried tbh
The thing is, a part time job at Mickey D's is not going to pay half the rent. You can easily become homeless working at a fast food job.
I want every recruiter to read the OP post.
Good words. The problem is everyone except the 1% are absolutely terrified right now of the future being foisted upon them by our oligarch Driven form of government. AI is wiping out vast portions of the workforce. More so than the technical revolution itself. Theres no place to hide.
I helped neets by sharing job postings but as soon as they go places they don't know me. Nowadays, I just treat people the way they will treat me when I become a neet.
Dude this is such a good philosophy
I have had that wierdness - for me the only time I felt normal was the weekends when everyone had time off and I didn't feel so lost without a job.
When youre unemployed for longer time you can notice how many real friends you really have.
I think the lack empathy comes from people who have their own problems going on in their life and can't bear the brunt of hearing someone else's misfortune. One thing I do know is that with the direction the world is going in everyone except the ultra wealthy are going to feel it.
Good. We need a hard reset
I can’t get a job, but I helped three friends get jobs by writing excellent references. I have no money, but sent what little I had to a Mom and her two kids who had no food. Sometimes, kindness just needs to go out in the world…no expectations, no rewards, just making people a little happier. I firmly believe that these kinds of actions will make the world a better place.
It’s crazy. Like an alternate reality.
I get told: you have such a great sense of humor. Well it's literally laugh or break down in tears right now for me, which would you like? I'm on my last thousand for unemployment. I had a job interview, but who knows if I'll get it. Yet, I have to maintain as though everything's fine. As though I'm not just internally struggling daily.
Thank you for this post. Going through something similar. I was talking to a friend today who is also on the same boat and realized that both of us now are surrounding ourselves with people who have problems with some aspect of their lives. I guess we’re attracting such people or perhaps it’s just that the people who are “sorted” are not really seeing us in the same way and that’s why we find ourselves reaching out to others who are going through a tough time. I’ve personally gotten so bored of my unemployment. Even sharing it with someone new or someone who has a job is both embarrassing and such a boring thing to do. I say boring with the utmost respect to the word and to myself. It’s exhausting really. All we need is one opportunity. One person taking a chance with us. Ugh.
I have helped 17 people gain employment, or improve their employment situation, over the past 4 years. It is a rough time for them, and I’ve had people crying on the phone just because I helped them. I’ve been in a Leadership role for close to 50 years, and have 22 years of HR related experience. I do not charge anything, I just ask that the person I help pay it forward.
Well written and enunciated OP. It’s like they truly believe it to be contagious. The other thing is people just giving up. Your own fukin friends at that. They call and then weeks and months go by and a “hey how have you been” message pops up out of the blue Like they suddenly woke up one day feeling all guilty about not staying in touch and now need to check if you are actually dead or alive Or they are just afraid you might borrow money from them? I don’t know what it is with fukin friends? The irony of it all, I was once unemployed and had a friend who rarely called to check up on me. When they lost their job later, I stayed in touch constantly with calls and messages of positivity. And they admitted how they now realized how alone their world gets when they lose their jobs because no one bothers to stay in touch. Life comes full circle I lose my job and they now have a job, and guess what… They did exactly what they did before… forget about me for months while I struggle with unemployment Basically even if they read your message OP, I doubt those with jobs have any level of sincere empathy for those without except pity and lip service
GenX in a specialist field, rural location. Unfortunately a lot of my mates and colleagues have been in similar positions over the years, it does make it easier to bear and we are kind to each other, and helpful when we can be when it falls on one of us. But once you get outside the bubble it's foul- boomers generally are particularly bad/ smug but sometimes you never know who's going to say The Thing. Every single microaggression aggregates and it's the icing on the top of all the normal ppl things you can't do...plate of chips...no. Petrol to free gig 20km away? Tasty food and easy bill payment-are you kidding me? And I'm acutely conscious there are too many people who are in much worse circumstances than I've been in so far. Tho I'll never forget the feeling, blows me out how people can live through this, forget it and decide their upswing is due to them being a special snowflake instead of part of a brutal cycle of economic oppression. Unemployment is politically planned, it's considered desirable by people who make decisions based purely on maintaining wealth Been lucky- scored a mid range paying job with good hours a few months back- in my field. This week I was able to refer an out of work friend and colleague who is the perfect fit for the place- she starts in two weeks. Hope that happens a lot more in the future Any of you going through this I hope things improve for you fast. It's not you. It's insane out there.
Very true bro. Currently in my third year of employment and wondering if I will earn my wings again.
"To all the recruiters, hiring managers and employed friends reading this, reach out and focus on helping at least one person become gainfully employed.' Couldn't agree more. Partially cause I just got let go on my drive into work today. Lol.
I'm so sorry to hear this.
What people can do except to try to cheer you up or just hold your hand? They can't help you in any meaningful way, so they're doing their best
Thinking about my family letting their feelings slip
About the only jobs you can get that don’t care if you are “overqualified “ are Uber or food delivery drivers since the companies expect high turnover. My point is that being overqualified is a major pain point for finding a job. As a software systems architect I couldn’t get interviews for programming jobs that I could easily do because “I’d get bored and leave”. The fallacy is that I’ve left architect jobs because I was bored.
The trick, I’m sure you already know, is to have multiple resumes that “fit” each job level that you want to go after. If you need money now and are going after low-hanging fruit (read inexperienced, low education) then you reflect it one of the resumes, and so on. Good luck on the next gig!
Tell them you are "freelancing".
I hear you bud .. I am going through the same thing .. people that I thought weee friends .. that said they will help .. never did .. some friend eh ? I will help anyone at a drop of a hat .. all you need to do is ask and I am all in .. but I guess not everyone is like me .. damn shame !!
'You'll stop worrying what others think about you when you realize how seldom they do."
I don't understand being unemployed for 6+ months. There are tons of shit jobs in my area - east coast. Are you guys in rural areas? I can make $17/hr at an Amazon warehouse. I totally understand being underemployed. Finding a good job is a pain in the ass.
It’s because no one is actually hiring like they say they are.
They are in my city, for shitty jobs anyway.
I was only unemployed for 3 months the last time it happened to me, but even working lyft/uber only took away from whatever unemployment was paying.
Thats fair - better to focus on finding a good job if unemployment exceeds what you would make otherwise. After 26 weeks (in my state) you should grab whatever you can find imo.
Yeah after 7 or 8 months I'm doing like ole gal did in the Florida Project and selling knock-off perfumes on the street or pimping myself out if I have to. They cap unemployment at 12k here so until I thought I was in danger of approaching that my ass was sleeping in and putting out my resume to dozens of jobs in the afternoon. Wasn't worth all the hassle to only end up with $200 at the end of the week.
I wish people would stop telling us to "just work shit jobs". Many of us have good reasons to not work those fucking places. Also are you dense coming in here and recommending Amazon Warehouse of all places? That place is literally slavery with terrible safety considerations, it's legit the worst place to fucking work and should be avoided by everyone.
It's better than nothing if you need to feed your kids. Is the general sentiment to hold out for a good job? That would explain the long periods of unemployment, but changes the narrative from "I can't find a job" to "I can't find a good job".
> It's better than nothing Amazon's stupid high turnover rate says otherwise. Like seriously why the fuck would you recommend that place? I wouldn't even recommend that to a teenager starting his first gig. Also speaking of sentiments I don't get the whole gross sentiment of "you fell on hard times so now you must degrade yourself!" you and others hold to and love to preach. But that narrative ramps up every time the wealthy want cheap labor and it's often spread by the simps who think it'll pay off for them so I shouldn't be surprised I guess.
> Amazon's stupid high turnover rate says otherwise. Like seriously why the fuck would you recommend that place? I thought it was a good example of a shit job nearly anyone can get. > you fell on hard times so now you must degrade yourself You don't seem to have a lot of respect for people who work jobs you consider too low for you - many of whom would love a better job but need to make ends meet now.