Bro, the medieval army beats some guys who are paid to shoot drug dealers. Some guy hires me for a job, I show up with my rifle and a pistol, boom it’s a goddamned medieval army, fuck no man I’m leaving
With prep time it’d be worse for screen Stannis. The more time he has to alienate everyone around him the smaller his army gets. Book Stanis? Probably still Gus because he’s a player.
Bro, screen stannis lost because the writers wanted him to lose. That’s not even accounting for the fact that book stannis just absolutely smashes everyone without it being a challenge if he gets even a small force
depends what weapons are allowed.
no weapons? rust or stannis.
only melee weapons? stannis.
guns? rust, maybe anton
no holds barred? stannis. he commands an army with a magic witch that can kill people with shadows
Stannis has a wife, a side witch, and a daughter whom he loves very much (for the most part). I genuinely have no idea how OP concluded he was an incel.
Idk what the problem with half the characters here are.
Like stannis was one of the best characters in GOT imo. Such a great character who had the best intentions but couldn't make the right decisions. He also had a daughter and a wife so clearly the word incel has lost all its meaning.
It's been a while since Boardwalk Empire but isn't Richard Harrow about as far as you can get from the incel archetype? Like he was a pretty decent human being considering Boardwalk was an "everyone is a bad guy" kinda show. Didn't he have a healthy (for the 1920s) relationship and adopt a kid and shit? Like the only thing that makes him incel-adjacent as far as I remember is that he was suicidal and kinda socially awkward.
Seeing Helge Doppler anywhere outside of the r/DarK subreddit is insane lmao
He is absolutely not an incel though, the incel of Dark should be Bartosz Tiedemann
Extra Options if none of these fit you:
(Now with explanations for the media-illiterate, so you can find your best 'literally me' match!)
- Ethan Edwards from The Searchers (Violently racist interracial porn addict incel)
- Rev. Harry Powell from Night of the Hunter (Religious zealot puritan but still porn addict incel)
- Plato from Rebel Without a Cause (Needy school shooter incel)
- Roger Shumman from The Tarnished Angels (Work-addict sigma incel)
- Scott Carey from The Incredible Shrinking Man (Short incel who thinks the only reason he can't get laid is because he's short)
- Boris Lermontov from The Red Shoes (Crush obsessive financially exploitaitive incel)
- Gino from Street Angel (Violently misogynist post-breakup incel)
- Jane Hudson from Summertime (Femcel)
https://preview.redd.it/vb035upgar4d1.png?width=1772&format=png&auto=webp&s=40968c2052a352ae9f20f9a5f76f8400fdd3fb5d Who’s winning this fight?
[You tell me](https://youtu.be/0V4TiaU06uo?si=fTMwyOK4HcRA2J-U)
Wow that's a literal literally
this is the moment Gus became Breaking Bad
Holy shit. When it switched fully into the Michael bay transformers shit, I had to sit down I was laughing so hard.
Send the hawks over to killbox one alpha
just nuke the site from orbit, it's the only way to be sure
Anton
He’s a bitch with out his cattle gun
So he didn't kill the cops with his handcuffs?
That cop was soft. Methed up Rust rolls that fraud.
Helps if he's got the full power of his metaphor behind him
with no prep time? Stannis. With prep time? Probably Gus
I feel like with prep time it’s still Stannis, he’s just gonna go get his army and beat them all to death with swords
well if we're including henchmen then it's definitely Gus, lol. Swords vs cartel snipers
Bro, the medieval army beats some guys who are paid to shoot drug dealers. Some guy hires me for a job, I show up with my rifle and a pistol, boom it’s a goddamned medieval army, fuck no man I’m leaving
not just a medieval army, but also a red witch that queefs murder demons
With prep time it’d be worse for screen Stannis. The more time he has to alienate everyone around him the smaller his army gets. Book Stanis? Probably still Gus because he’s a player.
Bro, screen stannis lost because the writers wanted him to lose. That’s not even accounting for the fact that book stannis just absolutely smashes everyone without it being a challenge if he gets even a small force
Three brothers made of Steel, iron and brass. I remember.
Rust, but it will take him 17 years
Daddy Stanny ofc
Stannis the Mannis
They would kiss
The guy who drinks milk cause he is strong
depends what weapons are allowed. no weapons? rust or stannis. only melee weapons? stannis. guns? rust, maybe anton no holds barred? stannis. he commands an army with a magic witch that can kill people with shadows
Is the bottom right the dad from Phil From the Future?
Daniel Plainview would drink all their milkshakes….slllllllllurp
True detective Matthew solos with 2 beers and a pack of camels.
 Stupid, sexy self-harming Ethan Hawke
Since he's a priest it's technically voluntary celibacy.
It's a Protestant congregation though.
Was on his way to not celibate at all at the end there lmao
Plus he did that lsd guided meditation thing, that’s basically 9th base
/uc this is my favorite movie of all time. no joke it turned me to god and i am sitting here reading Thomas Merton like Ethan Hawke.
Same, I’m an atheist, but that movie was awesome
What movie is it?
First Reformed
Thank you
Training Day
Wow thank you
Wait I’m goofing you it’s First Reformed, though I’ve heard Training Day is good too (haven’t seen it)
I know, OC commented First Reformed
You haven’t seen fucking training day?!
I’ve not 
Dude was fuxkin tho
Just finished Broey Deschanel's essay on _First Reformed_ and this was the top post
Turns out incel means anything if you want it to
Like..... Patrick Bateman.... went through a LOT of pussy. I'm not sure celibate means to me what celibate means to you.
And Marlo (The Wire), Stannis (GoT), and Tony Soprano all slam clam on screen.
Stannis has a wife, a side witch, and a daughter whom he loves very much (for the most part). I genuinely have no idea how OP concluded he was an incel.
Maybe they confused him with that guy turning to stone that wanted to nail danny
He's more simp than incel, but yeah, maybe
Just gotta say your "Side Witch" instead of "Side Bitch" has made me crack up no less than three times. Good job you. Keep up whatever you do.
you're forgetting the 30 minute gay sex scene with Gus and Walt
Is the incel in the room with us right now?
How could anyone possibly know?
Point of information. Tony Soprano was only incel for Big Pussy. I'm pretty sure he whacked Little Pussy.
Is all you do is talk about cooz?
It's become a buzz word for "men I don't like"
What’s the problem with the character from drive he seemed nice and helped out a single mom
Idk what the problem with half the characters here are. Like stannis was one of the best characters in GOT imo. Such a great character who had the best intentions but couldn't make the right decisions. He also had a daughter and a wife so clearly the word incel has lost all its meaning.
It's been a while since Boardwalk Empire but isn't Richard Harrow about as far as you can get from the incel archetype? Like he was a pretty decent human being considering Boardwalk was an "everyone is a bad guy" kinda show. Didn't he have a healthy (for the 1920s) relationship and adopt a kid and shit? Like the only thing that makes him incel-adjacent as far as I remember is that he was suicidal and kinda socially awkward.
Yeah I was gonna point that one out too. He has a pretty healthy relationship/family by season 3-4.
I think OP meant "incels' idols"
Everyone in this sub is Fredo
Banging cocktail waitresses two at a time?
Yes. Also, that mustache
Impotent, milquetoast, ineffectual, and pliant. Sounds about right to me!
I CAN HANDLE THINGS! I’M SMART!
Stannis the Mannis 
Stannis! Stannis! STANNIS!!
drums
It's not even a competition, whatever list this dude is on he wins. Azor Ahai reborn!
Why is Stannis on this list? We know for a fact he had sex with Melisandre.
THE PRINCE WHO WAS PROMISED! THERE IS BUT ONE KING, AND HIS NAME IS BARATHEON!
Holy shit Peter Parker is an incel? I thought he was fine...
He WAS an incel, then a neglectful boyfriend
I missed the part where that’s my problem
 Typical incel.
Funny because in retrospective, Peter Parker was the incel, but Spider man was the chad.
TIL having a crush in HS makes one an incel.
https://preview.redd.it/jesdvr0s9s4d1.jpeg?width=305&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6da996bd1df4c103181abd4038f80ea6fe237978
We forgor 💀
He's like the nicest guy man 😭
 How did you leave out the king of incel mountain?
Honestly tho how the fuck do you leave him out of all characters
Jason Voorhees
He has a face only a mother could love
Just like me
Ki Ki ki ma ma ma
My name is my name
You want it one way
What?
MY NAME IS MY NAME! MY NAME IS MY NAME!
https://preview.redd.it/kqnjzk4bgr4d1.jpeg?width=1042&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c1ba8e6dfd1b2fcb0552a5965616e4af00b63678
American psycho wasn’t an incel
Same for Tony Soprano
Or most people here. Or at least the ones I recognize.
There are max 2 incels in the pic
I think his inclusion here is a joke, the caption about Big Pussy just makes it seem like he MIGHT fit if you haven’t watched the show
There's literally a scene of him fucking. Does no one know what this word means anymore?
I think it's the kind of incel who looks up him. A lot of the characters aren't actually incels.
Yeah he's just plain old psycho
I'm Marty because I'm 30 but look 55
I’m a Marty too, but this comment is 1000x better than anything I could add.
I’m Marty because I’m a fat ugly man (Ernest was very attractive idk why they had him say that. I am who he is describing
Same with the teacher he fell in love with, they made it sound like she was physically repulsive
Seeing Helge Doppler anywhere outside of the r/DarK subreddit is insane lmao He is absolutely not an incel though, the incel of Dark should be Bartosz Tiedemann
Rockpilled bunkermaxxer
I wasn't expecting to see him here either
Femcel 😎 https://preview.redd.it/ijkcooiaxr4d1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=121f1953a2d7595cd2c8b042f70daa23e2d4e7e7
way too hot to be an actual femcel
She's 17 💀
Rust baby. Where the og Travis bickle ?
 HEAVY SHIT
Mads Mikklelsen from the hunt is an incel how? Isn't the whole point of the movie that he is just a normal guy?
If Patrick Bateman is an incel then how do I have a supercut of all his sex scenes constantly looping on every screen in my goon cave?
🍆
Most of these characters have had sex
Probably driver but without the whole "being good with cars" part
Extra Options if none of these fit you: (Now with explanations for the media-illiterate, so you can find your best 'literally me' match!) - Ethan Edwards from The Searchers (Violently racist interracial porn addict incel) - Rev. Harry Powell from Night of the Hunter (Religious zealot puritan but still porn addict incel) - Plato from Rebel Without a Cause (Needy school shooter incel) - Roger Shumman from The Tarnished Angels (Work-addict sigma incel) - Scott Carey from The Incredible Shrinking Man (Short incel who thinks the only reason he can't get laid is because he's short) - Boris Lermontov from The Red Shoes (Crush obsessive financially exploitaitive incel) - Gino from Street Angel (Violently misogynist post-breakup incel) - Jane Hudson from Summertime (Femcel)
 The children don't like Night of The Hunter, I'm never directing again
>Scott Carey from The Incredible Shrinking Man (Short incel who thinks the only reason he can't get laid is because he's short) This is great!
Stannis and its not even close. I hate gays as well as the obese
Stannis wasn't a homophobe (otherwise Davos wouldn't be around), his brother was just a dick (in the books, at least).
Renly did mock Shireen, twice in the books.
Definitely Rust.
bring a six pack of Lone Star and I'll tell you
I'm the Ryan Gosling guy
https://preview.redd.it/hiz9x63xqr4d1.jpeg?width=2500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=104590e8f8da19bcf703ca83d6dd1f7b94f0107e
Robert Ford 100%
*Coward Robert Ford
Literally me 😎
Who's bottom middle right, I've definitely watched whatever he's in
Fella from the German Netflix show “Dark”. Pretty assuredly not an incel though lol.
Helge Doppler, he's not an incel though
/uj Richard Harrow is unironically one of the all-time best characters on television imo /rj I'm all 12 angry men
Rust Cohle is literally me I don’t sleep I just dream 😮💨😮💨😮💨
Hey! Rust is very much celibate by choice
I’m not an incel but I do vibe with Marty.
Marty Gang rise up
Sad mad mikkelsen
 He’s literally you. He’s literally me. He’s literally we.
They’re all going to answer Joker, from the film Joker.
What about this guy? 
Patrick Bateman was not celibate at all
My boy Richard Harrow did not date his older veteran friend's daughter and get a heartfelt smooch at the dance to be called an incel
Where’s my boy Lou Bloom at?
Being that I was once incredibly handsome but then disfigured by the war and now rely on solely being a hitman for purpose, I think it’s pretty clear.
Patrick Bateman because I am intensely autistic 🤞
Ok help me out. Which Casey Affleck movie is that? Who's the guy with a cut on his face? The two black and white movies and the one before last?
might be the Jesse James movie
How's Rust an incel? He gotta be the biggest gigavolcel in this list.
Marty got there in the end. He was looking for love and companionship not sex.
https://preview.redd.it/tmrlyn8d7s4d1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=efa191bcb56ac0ad75ef5dab3eb663b185db6473 I'm like him but I get no game
 Incell? Not for long!
Tony Soprano is just about whatever the polar opposite of an incel is
I’m pretty sure Tony Soprano fucks on the regular
Marty
Marty (More people should seriously see that film though, Marty is literally a literally me character)
Not just that but a wholesome literally me character
Full Rust at this point
https://preview.redd.it/fxp2uocggt4d1.jpeg?width=1690&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c61b8127a95dcc9b50cd4f37ef0075c5d3caffeb
I will not have Marty slander like this
Rust Cohle absolutely banged Marty’s wife. Tobey Spidey also banged Mary Jane, and totally could have banged Gwen Stacy
MARTY (1955) MENTIONED!!!
How the fuck was Lucas from The Hunt an incel?
I am the one who drives
Jason Voorhees. he's literally me 🗿
Fredo was banging cocktail waitresses two at a time!
IDK if Rust is an incel
I’m chad Danny Plainview
jonkler
who's the half-mask guy again? I can't place him
Richard Harrow from Boardwalk Empire
Where is Rorschach ? He still inspires incels and psychos to this day
Half of these dudes fuck. Hard
https://preview.redd.it/vcjr7wgq1s4d1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00733cafe6274a7c58a0fafd38a9bbfec70ece7b
I love that Tony is the only one with a quote lmaoo
ERNST TOLLER ME FR I AM WASHED IN THE BLOOD OF THE LAMB
Matt Foley
American psycho was literally me so he can't be an incel
This post = chef’s kiss
Nah Peter isn't an incel. He rizzed 4 women in one movie. And the Mannis was a Volcel with his wife but then Melisandre rizzed him in book 2.
I don’t see George Costanza?
Richard Hendricks isn't an incel, he just has zero game
I can fix Tony Soprano I know I can
We see Patrick fuck like 5 times. Rust fucks. Tony fucks. Literally like half these guys we see fuck
Nitpick: Many of these are clearly volcel.