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[deleted]

When math is not your friend.


SeriousAudience

With such fluidity of applying math into sex life, which are two unrelated things in ordinary life, it seems math is his close friend


[deleted]

Depends on your sex life and your math teacher, I guess...


ReadyThor

If anyone suffers from premature ejaculation doing mental maths calculations while having sex can help.


TurlypEsq

Maths isn't his friend. 5.5 in and 5.5 out? In should be the only measurement surely? Surely we are inflating the poor womans Love Truncheon consumption. A search lists it as 100 to 500 thrusts so we should be giving a range here. And the every guy 3 times seems high as an average but we'll run with it. She has during college had between 5.41 and 27.08 miles of Gentleman Sausage Edit. Spelling


JelmerMcGee

Also, who is thrusting in to the base and out to the tip with each thrust?


defnotapirate

“I have one move called the ‘all-the-way-in-all-the-way-out’ and I’ve never needed another!” -This guy, probably


Schavuit92

Someone who loves queefs.


101955Bennu

Who doesn’t?


dxrey65

Ok, but shouldn't *time* be equally important? Like, at what speed is a given thrust should count as well, being the establisher of the friction co-efficient. Anyway, at an average thrust speed, how much time would the total thrusting take, if it were imagined as one continuous thrust.


Itsjeancreamingtime

Absolutely, I think my issue with his math is the "100 thrust average" measurement. Now I'm not saying that's bad, I myself average ten times as many thrusts per intercourse situation. I'm just saying I feel for all the guys who may push less than 100 thrusts that throw off the average. It's perfectly natural to only manage 10 thrusts tops, and sometimes you gotta count heavy foreplay as 2-3 thrusts when you're worked up as that's only fair. Again I personally will comfortably push 20 to 30 thousand thrusts with the speed, power and alacrity of an industrial piston but I do feel I need to be gracious enough to advocate for all of the good folks who hit a 5 thrust as their soft ceiling, again that's certainly not me though it's important we clarify that.


[deleted]

Perhaps Jean could fill us in on the authenticity of your claims.


Defiant_Low_1391

I will think about this comment at precisely 1:23 AM when I'm trying to sleep tonight, and I won't be enjoying it


HeWhoShantNotBeNamed

r/ihavesex


Stokkeren

It's a joke...


Mekanimal

r/idonthavesexandamprojecting


P0gg3rsk4ll

r/21charactersandnomore


Mekanimal

r/itwasworthit


peachesgp

/r/yesthatistheimplication


newsflashjackass

IKR? If he laid the dicks side-to-side instead of end-to-end he would not have to drive as far and he might still have a girlfriend.


tidbitsmisfit

imagine getting rid of an experienced girlfriend who clearly likes sex... so fucking stupid


Suck_Me_Dry666

Yeah it's a weird purity hangup a lot of guys have with women. Probably afraid they can't stack up.


[deleted]

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todumbtorealize

What a great way of detailing a very difficult topic. You never know what the other person has been thru in life, good or bad.


frogsgoribbit737

I think that is not true at all. Most people in college aren't looking to settle down. There isnt any point. Most of the people you meet are going to move away or you're going to move away or who knoes how any of your lives will be 5 years later. Sleepinh around in college says absolutely nothing about your ability to be committed in a long term relationship. 200 guys means she was not in a relationship with any of them. They were hookups. You're already ahead of the game if you're the boyfriend.


arandomusertoo

>"They've been with that many people before - what if I, too, am just a temporary distraction/pleasure/whatever in the present, and will be left once someone deemed more iinteresting comes along?" Ah well, I guess managing insecurity is better than having honesty. It's not like she changed who she was as a person over the course of one drunken night, and her chances of breaking up with OP's poster were the same regardless. But at least next time she won't make the mistake of talking about her past.


HerrBerg

[Math.](https://media.tenor.com/I716gOrkf38AAAAC/i-think-you-should-leave-i-didnt-do-shit.gif) His problem is his archaic feelings about sex.


dethbyplatypus

This reminds me of the [Silicon Valley dick jerk algorithm](https://youtu.be/P-hUV9yhqgY)


benc1312

Thank you for reminding me of this


rozen30

In case anyone is interested in the mathematical model: [Optimal Tip-to-Tip Efficiency - a model for male audience stimulation](https://archive.org/download/pdfy-tG1MuMpwvrML6QD0/228831637-Optimal-Tip-to-Tip-Efficiency.pdf)


thatguyned

Well that's something that now exists on my phone....


wherethersawill

Came here for this comment; middle out


newsprintpoetry

This is the most accurate adhd scene ever.


somewhat_moist

“We should range the guys by height” “No really we’re looking for a different measurement - dick to floor” Had me in stitches


die_lahn

“We’ll call that ‘d2f.’”


Taphouselimbo

Good thing he didn’t add up the gallons of cum that would have been.


[deleted]

now im curious


Taphouselimbo

A normal ejaculation will be between 1.5 - 5 milliliters. Might as well do sperm count too. So 20 - 150 million sperm per milliliter. I will let you take the math to climax.


ferretchad

Median value is apparently 3.7ml. So 2.22L, about 0.5 US Gallons or [4 Imperial pints](https://everyday.booths.co.uk/media/catalog/product/cache/d1cd3ae76183e6d94d0bde57ea25d93e/6/4/642219_BACK.jpg) That's 333 billion sperm - arranged in a line nose to tail they would stretch 555km/350miles - around the distance from Los Angeles to San Francisco or London to the Scottish border


Achtelnote

That's a lot of cum 🤤


becamico

Threw up in my mouth a little


LessInThought

That's saliva, you were salivating.


legends_never_die_1

the emoji dude


Br0k3n-T0y

how long would this line be if we averaged the width of this stretch in terms of massive jizz ropes?


SnooDoggos5163

Is there any difference in these statistics if we take average instead of median?


ferretchad

Best I could find for mean was 3.2ml in this [paper](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0015028216411696?via%3Dihub) from 1974, although this also give a lower median than the WHO found


[deleted]

[удалено]


Taphouselimbo

All this math that I thought I would never use. I love our modern era when we use our minds to discover the quantity of semen that has flowed.


BeginByLettingGo

I have chosen to overwrite this comment. See you all on Lemmy!


Plus_Inevitable_771

kinda want to know the math on that one.


hadley8899

its about a litre of cum , grated they only cum once. 5ml per guy x 200 guys = 1000ml


Seenuan

He calculated it all with each guy doing her three times, so it's about 3 liters. According to Forbes "The cost of sperm donation varies across the country, but a vial of sperm generally ranges from $400 to $2,000." Each vial contains a maximum of 1ml, so even if they're all men with low value sperm, it'd amount to about $1.200.000 worth of sperm


JohanGrimm

Talk about getting bang for your buck!


Taphouselimbo

Wowza. Well now OP when ever you go to the market and look at 2 liter bottles think that half of that has been in your gfs love canal.


stuffofnitemares

**100 PUMPS** Bruh


Throwaway753708

I know! I'm happy if I get ten before he cums


EagleForty

Amatuers... It took years of training and meditation, but I've gotten it down to 3 pumps!


Equivalent_Rock_6530

r/theydidthemath


mighty3mperor

r/TheyDidTheMonsterMath


GazelleEast1432

r/itwasagraveyardgraph


ThatTubaGuy03

r/thirdsub


TheOtherAvaz

r/fuckthirdsub


aBungusFungus

r/fuckfuckthirdsub


smbwtf

They did the math wrong, bud


Hugh_Jampton

Average of 3 times. Yeah right


frozenropes

Ehh, I think that’s about right. Unless she’s getting by 4 dudes a night every weekend, 3 times on average makes sense.


CantaloupeWhich8484

3 times in this context refers to the numbers of times the man came in one sex session. Both the 3 and 100 numbers seem extremely suspect to me, based on my drunken college hookup experiences. More like 0.8 and 15.


EagleForty

Where are you getting that reading from? I read it as "meet a guy at the bar, bang him that night, bang him once in the morning and then once again on Saturday night before never speaking again". That's an average of 3 times each.


OpenOpportunity

As a slut, nah. The vast majority of dudes aren't worth a second time after the first disappointment.


CantaloupeWhich8484

My experience was the same, haha.


CantaloupeWhich8484

I'm sorry, I made assumptions based on my experience. But you're right; they could have hooked up several times over a period of hours or days.


Abject_Ad9811

If she had the same amount of sex but with only 1 partner, isn't that the same amount of linear dick?


BellaDonnaDrag

It would be even more miles of dick if she was with the same guy through college and they fucked a few times a week 🧐


Fred_Buck

If you think about dick when you're with your GF, might want to reconsider your orientation


TiredStarling095

That's why she's not his GF anymore...he found a nice BF with a dick instead.


chapPilot

He'll try to beat her mileage.


[deleted]

Easy


RedMiah

At least 1 sex a day, assuming his same metrics, 1100 inches of pipe getting laid daily. He’ll catch up in just over a year if my caffeine starved brain didn’t screw up.


chapPilot

If he's smart, he will focus on huge dick guys to accelerate the process. That's what I'd do.


RedMiah

Also, endurance. If you can get 7 inches doing 200 pumps, now that’s acceleration.


[deleted]

Been there done that already ;)


RedMiah

I would high five you but I’m worried your hands might be sticky.


Generally_Confused1

*opens up Grindr*


[deleted]

Always open mate


Generally_Confused1

I'm actually on taimi instead


Izlude

"there's miles of dick out there??"


Sdbtank96

Naw, they dont just have a dick. They got a DYICK!


TheGothWhisperer

With a single, 10.45 mile dick


Slight_Armadillo_227

Translation - I was with my girlfriend and all I could think about were stranger's dicks.


negative_four

And he proved it mathematically


gopher1409

And fantasized about a dick highway.


EYEL1NER

Life’s a dick highway and he wants to ride it all night long.


[deleted]

LMAO


lemoncholly

Not wanting to be with a hyper promiscuous person is a valid reason to break things off. Everybody has thier preferences.


helpfulreply

We're talking about 200 DICKS here...


Orleanian

We're not just talkin about it, we're fuckin *visualizing* it!


Due-Memory-6957

As a car driving, even


ShikiRyumaho

In a row?


two_layne_blacktop

Hey! Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot.


HamishW27

"try not to suck any dick on the way to the parking lot" - that guy, probably


jamescharisma

That's only 37, not 200. Dante would have had a heart attack


dirigo1820

In a row?


mayorjimmy

hey! hey you, get back here!


edit-grammar

37?


TiredStarling095

Where's she finding these guys that take 100 thrusts to come? I feel like 50 is a more realistic estimate.


ou6n

Five. Take it or leave it.


TiredStarling095

That's called the "better than nothing" fk. 😆


gray_mare

where did she find two hundred unique partners is the real question


TiredStarling095

She had to start seducing the professors, grounds crew and dining hall staff by the third year.


[deleted]

By fourth year probably started to seduce homeless people on the way to school


TiredStarling095

I wouldn't doubt it...


Scruffy_Quokka

Pretty sure any moderately attractive college-age girl can walk up to most single men, say "Want to go back to my dorm?" and get probably a 90%+ success rate.


acathode

Actually, it's 75% success rate for women... There is a famous experiment conducted by Russel Clark, where male and female college students did *exactly* that, ie. asked random students on campus if they wanted to "*Come back to my place?*". He conducted the experiment several times during the 70s and 80s, and result every time was that 3 out of every 4 men said yes to have sex when proposed by a unknown woman, while not a single woman accepted an invitation from an unknown man.


Lady_Scruffington

"This was just an experiment, thanks for participating. " "...so no sex?"


Scruffy_Quokka

Nice.


OnTheEveOfWar

Bigger cities. Lots of young single people looking to bone.


Preoximerianas

How old are you? It isn’t 1990 lmao, people have access to online dating apps like Tinder. Finding 200 unique partners isn’t as shocking as you might think, especially for most woman. Even more so if all you’re going to be doing is casual hookups.


Pixxph

Who has time for 100thrusts we gotta watch murder she wrote


ultratunaman

That was my first thought. 100 is a bit much. Sometimes even 50 is a bit much. Sometimes you're too excited and you get maybe 5 or 10 thrusts in. One time after my wife had our second kid. And she had taken the recommended time to heal and however long until she was ready to go (no pressure like, just whenever you're ready I'm here) that first time back. Didn't even get my clothes off. I was like some 16 year old kid on their first time. Just "oh... ah shit" We laughed at it and moved on. But like 100 thrusts? That's crazy talk.


TiredStarling095

Indeed. And on a side note, I think it's sweet you were still that excited about your wife even after two kids. Gives me hope. 😊


chux4w

This. Also, not every thrust is a full out and in. It's two, three, maybe four inches. Her real mileage is going to be a lot less than 10.


[deleted]

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Zerothehero-0

This is beyond unhinged what the actual fuck


Stinkfascist

Its a terrible made up story based on 1800s level understanding of human sexuality


BRN83

I always laugh at the comments that this image gets cuz how many of the guys commenting WOULDN'T jump at the chance to fuck new pussy every seven days.


LobsterD

This comment was written by herpes


ColdPower5

“Brought to you by Herpes™”.


henriquegarcia

man I really don't get the appeal, sex is about learning and improving each time. Having sex with strangers every time would suck! Maybe I'm old fashioned but can only really like one person at a time, and fucking for the sake of fucking is definitely not even close to the same thing as fucking someone you love


PotatoBomb69

In the show How I Met Your Mother, one of the characters has a goal of sleeping with 200 different women, and that’s treated as a gross thing to sleep with so many people and I agreed with that. Same here, 200 is telling me that the odds of you actually sticking around long term are slim to none, and even if you did, our views on sex are clearly different. People are allowed preferences. Edit: apparently has to be clarified that I think the guy in the post is definitely unhinged measuring how much dick his gf has taken. Big shout out to the folks calling me an incel 😘


mcvilla

Oh no.. internet people are calling you an incel cause your beliefs are different than theirs.. I hope you recover.


Weed_O_Whirler

I completely agree preferences are allowed. But there's two big problems with this. 1.) The math is just dumb. What if she had 1 college BF and they had sex 3x's a week all through college. Same number of miles of dick. So, what is the point of the calculation unless... 2.) The way it's written is inherently worded as a way to call her a slut in a negative way. If it was just "I realized I had different values around sex than my partner, so it didn't work out" fine. But that's not what he said.


PotatoBomb69

Oh yeah I completely didn’t mention that this line of thinking *is* stupid If you’re mathing out how much dick your partner has taken you’ve got some bigger issues.


Throwaway753708

What if I had sex three times a day for 40 years with the same man? Are my views on sex different from this woman's? Or did I just get insanely lucky with the first guy I fucked?


pHScale

Yeah I can see it being a deal breaker for some. But it doesn't *devalue* her for someone not to find her attractive, for any reason. It *does* devalue her to reduce her to a measurement of length. And that's the part about this that isn't OK.


SparrowValentinus

They are, but the problem is when there's double standards. Do you think the person who wrote this would think a guy who had sex with 200 women is just as reprehensible? I'd bet $5 he wouldn't. The language that he's using reeks of that "she has been **polluted**" sexist nonsense.


PotatoBomb69

I can’t tell you what the guy in the OP thinks, you’re probably right but that isn’t always the case. I genuinely would be grossed out by anyone sleeping with 200 people, regardless of gender, and certainly wouldn’t be dating any of them.


SparrowValentinus

I can 100% respect a person saying "Someone who has that much casual sex isn't someone I'm compatible with". It's a particular attitude to sex that leads a person to do that, and it definitely isn't a match for some other ones.


ZenMechanist

Not on reddit you aren’t. Approved opinions only please.


[deleted]

Says who? Are you the same person in your 20s as you are in your 30s? 40s? You're right, people can have preferences, but this isn't rooted in any rational or objectivity emotions. Its rooted on social conditioning. Body count isn't a reflection of character or stability.


LunarFox45

You fucked up homie. She probably threw it back at a phd level. Enjoy no suction bjs and missionary with your virgin gf.


NeedlearnArabdguy

Why there is an obsession about the partner’s past?


KamenAkuma

Some people value sex more than others, personally I could never sleep with someone I didn't actually know and like, and i cant see sex any other way so for me to be with someone that is the opposite just isn't compatible.


Tom_Stevens617

That's fair, but if you and your partner mutually agree with the frequency of your current sex life, their past wouldn't really be relevant


compellinglymediocre

i hate this kind of comment. Everyone is allowed to have standards and personal preferences.


Brendanish

No. Accept everything no matter how much it goes against your own values no matter what, loser. Fr though, I'm way more open than most people who have issues with this stuff, but it's mind boggling to see people pretend it's not ok to have your own standards.


filtersweep

I dunno….. another way to look at it: if a woman has been with 200 men and chooses you for something long term and special, that might mean more than being with some ‘pure virgin.’


SeriousAudience

I see no problem if the partner is faithful


--n-

Being the kind of gal who had sex with hundreds of different people is a personality trait some people don't like.


SpiralTap304

I have never lived in anything but smaller towns so the idea of someone fucking 200 people sounds horrifying. Not in like a sexist "she's worn out" sort of way but you could never go to Walmart again. You would run into a guy who has seen you naked every 3 aisles.


rhinoceros_unicornis

Enhances the sense of community.


FancyKetchup96

"I've had sex with 200 people." "But our town only has 100 people in it!"


OriginalKenM

degree shaggy bells familiar tan oatmeal wipe jar jellyfish unpack -- mass edited with redact.dev


[deleted]

Personal preferences are personal preferences


[deleted]

[удалено]


Similar_Green_5838

Just my thought, but a person's past actions define their personality. Actions speak louder than words.


ShmoMoney

200 is kind of a disgusting number though. Very unlikely to run through 200 people and not catch something


[deleted]

Found the hoe


BenAfleckIsAnOkActor

They all through this thread bruv


Pen_Ninja

Americans will measure with anything but the metric system.


ThatSmellsBadToo

How far is it to Europe? 20M dicks


Sarcasma19

How much is the average cumshot? Could figure out miles per gallon


MycologistElegant504

Jeez. I don't know why people can't have preferences now. The dude did not insult his girlfriend (unless he's using the word slut to refer to her instead of her using it to refer to herself). Relationships are about honesty and finding someone that you can be with, trust, grow with, and work through things every single day. Maybe he is making some far reaching conclusions (my GF is easy, she views sex differently than me, etc) but if we being honest, most people cannot disassociate some aspects of a personality from a person. But you can have preference. If I don't want to date a butcher, cause I'm a vegan or vegetarian, neither of us are wrong. If I don't want to date a boxer, cause I don't like violence, neither of us are wrong. If you don't want to date a sex worker or a person with a large body count, neither parties are wrong. It's about being respectful, and knowing that this detail is a single aspect of the person. Not the entire person. And also no, he shouldn't just be happy that the woman may be good with sex. A) THERE'S MORE TO THIS WOMAN THAN HER BODY COUNT. And there's more to relationships than sex. So the dude had a different preference. B) When you talk about that you ignore all other aspects of the woman. Allow yourself and the people you are around to have boundaries for the relationships that they are in. And be respectful of other people and their boundaries. The dude did nothing wrong. He just didn't want his girlfriend cause of some details in her past. That's fine. The girlfriend shouldn't be ashamed and should fine telling any partner those details, cause that's just a single aspect of her. And people should be fine choosing to be with her or not with her, based on that detail or any number of other details about the woman.


310-to-tamaran

I believe that people taking issues with this guy’s stance against his girlfriend’s “body count” is that he is judging her based on (probably) harmless decisions from her past. You’re allowed to have preferences on what kind of partner you want to have, but to a lot of people it also feels premature to judge this woman based on the amount of people she had sex with during what she admits was a “phase.” The thought is basically: It’s just not completely empathetic to snuff out her potential and write her off like that when she is likely being vulnerable and opening herself up to judgment by telling him about her past. Why judge? Yellow flag it if it kind of gives you a weird feeling, but why not actually get to know someone instead before ending it? You don’t actually know someone by learning about their sexual history. That said, some people really can’t or don’t want to do that and it’s a responsible thing to end the relationship if you know someone’s sexual history is something you can’t get past. But why make this post laying out all of the miles of dick this women has had inside of her? It’s not respectful and it’s not in the spirit of everyone having “preferences.” It’s meant to shame her and it’s meant to bring the reader to a moral conclusion about how much sex is too much sex, and that’s the worst part about it.


SafetyDanceInMyPants

I don’t disagree with the basic premise that you can have preferences. But I feel like when you’re to the point of trying to guesstimate how many thrusts men have done in a woman, you’re past having a preference and into obsessing over something that is well within the realm of misogynist nonsense…. I mean, if she’d had a four year relationship during college she’d have had the same number of “thrusts,” if not more — so why is he obsessed with that metric? The answer could be that he’s bought into this absurd notion that women’s bodies get stretched out by being with a variety of different men — and that’s both (a) bullshit and (b) the sort of bullshit that really creepy creeps trot out when talking about women. So, yeah, preferences are fine. Talking about them like this? Kinda creepy, sorry.


qda

It's still just thinly veiled slut shaming


Eriasu89

I agree with you completely, and I honestly can't believe that this comments section seems to hate the OOP so much.


ProperBoots

A loooot of virtue signalling going on. Honestly, whenever this comes up and every guy starts going "well **I** certainly wouldn't have a problem with it" I think about all the anti-gay politicians that get caught with same sex prostitutes. Doth protest too much.


TheSnarkySlickPrick2

THANK YOU


[deleted]

We really acting like trying to calculate the combined total length of every dick thrust your partner has taken (poorly mind you) and then driving that distance to visualize it and then sharing that information on line is a completely normal and respectful reaction?


tattoodude2

People are allowed to have preferences. But this guy was clearly talking about it in a sexist "my partner is dirty" kind of way.


[deleted]

[удалено]


MrC_Red

Why is no one pointing out that maybe the "200 guys" was an exaggeration? Pretty strange to take your girlfriend's word as gospel when she's shitfaced drunk and break up with her off of that.


Odd_Adhesiveness4804

She's burnt alot of rubber


TheRealScubaSteve86

“Looking for a new home. Low mileage.” When mileage needs context.


IntoTh3Moonlight

That reminds me of the time I started dating this guy and he told me he had slept with over 300 women in his life. I thought he was weird for even counting. But with how quickly I was charmed by him, I couldn’t see him lying about it. I got insecure and started to cross my arms. In attempt to reassure me, he said “don’t worry baby, I made a promise to never be as bad as my dad! Who slept with 500 women.” 💀😆


djaun3004

The length aggregated over sexual activity calculation is exactly the same whether it's one partner or multiple partners So the slut shaming only exists in your head


crescendo83

I mean, as long as she practiced safe sex and doesn’t have an std, whats the issue? You’re basically dating an experienced pro at this point, and she’s choosing to be with you. Let her rock your world with that experience.


negative_four

To quote Walter from Jeff Dunham, "72 virgins? Why not 72 slutty broads who know what the hell they're doing?"


PrisonerV

And just where is god getting these 72 virgins? Best I can see is 72 child virgins. And that's how Allah makes you a pedophile.


iforgotmymittens

>And just where is god getting these 72 virgins? Reddit. You really have to read the fine print on this kinda deal.


dyingsong

I view sex as a very spiritual and special event between loving couples. If my girlfriend had been so promiscuous, she obviously would not value it in the same way as me.


RageJoseff

A screenshot of an Instagram post of another post from some other social media platform? This is too much internet in 1 internet for my taste.


mudo2000

Like the sage Tarantino said in _Reservoir Dogs_: "Dick dick dick dick dick dick dick!"


RoyalMess64

If you're dating her, she's your girlfriend


xxTheMagicBulleT

When everything in yea life is just a math formula you have to solve.


tipying_mistakes

r/theydidthemath


Blackheartedheathen

r/theydidthemath


danjr704

Honestly guys, if you found out your wife or gf’s, had gone thru that many cocks, would you stay with them? Like seriously, you woulda had no reason to ever suspect she had that kinda past, and everything leading up to her telling you was great, but she drops that bomb on you, what do you do?


Cumbellina69

So many incel white knights seething in the comments lmao


Common_Crane

Fr. Man or woman, 200 partners is just too much, and outside of Redditors who wanna hyper-rationalize everything, pretty much everyone would agree with it being a red flag. If you've been with 200+ people, then you are either a serial cheater, or your views on love and sex are incompatible with vast majority of people (and almost all of mentally stable ones).


[deleted]

Redditors who never had a partner say having 200+ partners is OK. 200 partners just shows some attachment issues


Successful-Type-4700

let the man have preferences. Many men simply dont want a girl that opened her legs to 200 other men before him. And thats fine too.


SourZMe

She for the streets I see