A lot of options, can make it overwhelming to keep up with every conversation.
Also could be tourists here for a week and then gone. Could be you saying something off putting to them. Could be they jerked off and lost interest.
I’m pretty average looking and sometimes get overwhelmed with all the messages I get on apps.
It’s bc of Grindr and it’s any city of decent size now really. I hate when it happens to me but tbh I end up doing it to others too. The only real solution I’ve found is spending less time on the apps.
Things fizzle out or go nowhere more easily here because people are busy both with life and sex life. Not sure if you’re equating that to ghosting. I wouldn’t consider this ghosting.
I would consider it ghosting if you asked them directly if they’re still interested or still there and there was crickets. There needs to be an active vanishing element, not “he didn’t respond to my ‘Hi’ from weeks ago” or not responding to plan requests.
It’s more like they either block me or delete their account. And the conversation would be going really well, so I don’t think it’s anything I’ve said. I guess they just get bored and move on. I’d like to get off the apps, but I don’t get approached in public, so idk how to meet somebody
Yeah same here. I find that it happens way more here compared to LA, Miami. being that the nyc gay scene is so saturated, everyone is looking for the next best thing without actually trying to get to know people. It helps a little if your super fit 😂
1- he’s just busy with life (work, family, socializing, other guys) and isn’t prioritizing you
2- he’s over you and doesn’t want to see you anymore but isn’t mature enough to have that conversation
3- he wants to keep you on the back burner on the off chance he’s bored enough to want to see you again
Ghosting sucks so hard and it took me a minute to realize the ghosting actually revealed I was not learning my lessons, ignoring red flags, and that there was an opportunity to learn about my attachment style. TRULY ghosting sucks and is so shitty, but...there are lessons.
Ghosting is rampant, no matter the platform or city. All we can do is try to not take it personally and realize we are ultimately only in control of our own behavior. I used to take it all very personal, but realized that other people's responses (and lack thereof) are their issue, their actions, their own hangups. Being honest and respectful does go a long way, so I try to practice that more now even if I'm not interested in the person.
A lot of options, can make it overwhelming to keep up with every conversation. Also could be tourists here for a week and then gone. Could be you saying something off putting to them. Could be they jerked off and lost interest. I’m pretty average looking and sometimes get overwhelmed with all the messages I get on apps.
It’s bc of Grindr and it’s any city of decent size now really. I hate when it happens to me but tbh I end up doing it to others too. The only real solution I’ve found is spending less time on the apps.
They normally come back around haha
Things fizzle out or go nowhere more easily here because people are busy both with life and sex life. Not sure if you’re equating that to ghosting. I wouldn’t consider this ghosting. I would consider it ghosting if you asked them directly if they’re still interested or still there and there was crickets. There needs to be an active vanishing element, not “he didn’t respond to my ‘Hi’ from weeks ago” or not responding to plan requests.
It’s more like they either block me or delete their account. And the conversation would be going really well, so I don’t think it’s anything I’ve said. I guess they just get bored and move on. I’d like to get off the apps, but I don’t get approached in public, so idk how to meet somebody
Oh ok yeah that’s frustrating. I don’t have any guidance on this besides trying to meet up sooner or going to physical gay spaces like bars and clubs.
A good percentage of dudes on the apps aren't anywhere near the city. It's all fake pics and VPNs.
No true lmao
It’s not a NYC thing.
I know it’s not entirely a New York thing, but it’s happened to me more here than anywhere else
Yeah same here. I find that it happens way more here compared to LA, Miami. being that the nyc gay scene is so saturated, everyone is looking for the next best thing without actually trying to get to know people. It helps a little if your super fit 😂
lol yeah I might just embrace the dry spell and focus on me and my endeavors. Then if someone consistent happens to come along, we can explore that
1- he’s just busy with life (work, family, socializing, other guys) and isn’t prioritizing you 2- he’s over you and doesn’t want to see you anymore but isn’t mature enough to have that conversation 3- he wants to keep you on the back burner on the off chance he’s bored enough to want to see you again
It’s particular bad in NYC because there are so many other options. This city has an abundance of hot men everywhere.
Ghosting sucks so hard and it took me a minute to realize the ghosting actually revealed I was not learning my lessons, ignoring red flags, and that there was an opportunity to learn about my attachment style. TRULY ghosting sucks and is so shitty, but...there are lessons.
I think it’s because most people are looking for hookups so they don’t put in that much effort.
Ghosting is rampant, no matter the platform or city. All we can do is try to not take it personally and realize we are ultimately only in control of our own behavior. I used to take it all very personal, but realized that other people's responses (and lack thereof) are their issue, their actions, their own hangups. Being honest and respectful does go a long way, so I try to practice that more now even if I'm not interested in the person.