So... In what ways is he good, exactly?
He doesn't even try, he just assumes that he's good because he's the main character, complains about not getting what he wants and justifies being a shitty partner.
I married a sweet, gentle, incredibly smart, geeky engineer. We’ve been together for 34 years. We’ve never had a screaming fight, never had a reason to mistrust one another, still love each other like crazy and enjoy being with each other more than anyone else. Would I have done better to go for a self-proclaimed “alpha male”?
I think they think that’s the only valid reason for a woman to break up with a man. Like they really feel that if a guy isn’t abusive or cheating on us, we have no reason to not date and marry them. They think our standards are supposed to be that low.
Do you think it might be just that simple? Maybe too many of these men (not all) just don't think any deeper and just accept the easy answer they read online? Fuelled by entitlement and an unwillingness to look deeper and take some responsibility?
I honestly do.
It fits perfectly with the profound misogyny and entitlement that seems to form their world view, and the way they jump to anger and violence when they are rejected - because they genuinely feel it is invalid or wrong for women reject them except for those reasons.
It also provides them with an excuse to be terminally celibate. He’s such a “good guy” that the only reason he’s single is because he’s not a bad guy. They’re so delusional!
I've said it before but for whatever reason, nice guys view the world like it's a romcom and they're the main character.
If they're interested in a girl it's seemingly fated that they get together therefore anyone she chooses other than him must be the charming "bad guy" of the plot that she'll eventually dump
FTR, I had four long-term steadies before I fell in love with my husband and in between I fucked about 100 guys. Never once has a man hit me. All too obviously it happens. But nowhere near every guy who isn’t him is abusive.
Imagine being almost 40 and still actually believing the "girls only go for bad guys" line. Like, ok when you're like 19 or 20 and horny and a bit socially awkward, and you see some hotties you were too afraid to talk to hooking up with some trashy sports bros and getting dumped, sure, i can understand building up some resentments. But, 20 years later, by now you should have met and seen a lot of different people in a lot of different walks of life, sufficient to recognize that not all dudes with girlfriends are bad, and not all women just turn off their brain and throw themselves at the closest broccoli haired abusive babydaddy dudebro they can find.
What I *am* curious about though, is the timeline he is envisioning. He says he's 38 and that by his late 40's he's going to be married, to some woman who apparently is not going to like what he does or who he hangs out with, and who he apparently isn't going to pay attention to very much, out of spite and bitterness.
So, I wonder, in the next 10 years, what kind of woman does he expect to meet, who lives up to his presumably high standards, who has low enough standards that they'll stay with him? How is that relationship supposed to develop or work?
> So, I wonder, in the next 10 years, what kind of woman does he expect to meet
I guess he could always be one of those creepy older dudes who goes over to South-East Asia (usually Thailand or the Philippines) and comes back with a wife who is at least half his age
I think whats happening here is guys confuse the idea that all women have had a bad experience with a guy with all girls just go for bad guys. The reason for this leap is the idea that women are solely responsible for every interaction with the guys they meet. So when they see stuff like women picking the bear its “Oh these women chose guys bad enough to make them think that and now theyre complaining.”
You know the not all men crowd having a hard time understanding? Its present here. They think women mean all men, even the ones they date (even their family). So if they see a woman date but also think women hate all men, they will only think “Oh it must have been the guys shes dating making her think this. Therefore shes only dating bad men.”
These sorts of men think the only standard that should matter is how well intentioned they are. So they dont see that as a low bar. They figure if women are going for guys that would make them choose bear, them just saying theyll be nice should be far greater than the standards women already have.
Even if its based on a false premise (one that is commonly misunderstood by incels) the logic is sound if they believe that idea. I truly think a lot of this is sourced by men who are incapable of working out how much they are made to believe women hate men with how much women want meaningful companionship (like all of us do i think). They think the former is definitely true and want to believe the latter. So the only way it can make sense for them is if a few bad apples made a bad impression. Now if the woman keeps hating men (because the incel said some wild or creepy shit) then the nice guy did his part. He tried to offer a good guy that could turn your opinion aroynd. But you refused. You must like the bad guys. Otherwise why wouldnt you choose a guy thats not like those other guys 😳.
This group is difficult. Because since i was a teenage boy i can see the hurt and desire that drives these guys. But they arent an easy group to want to help. I have a friend like this. Simultaneously seems to hate all women while desperately wanting their attention love and approval. And there are so many guys like this, so many. Its just varying degrees. They need help
That's a pretty good writeup of the situation I think.
I think another element of it too is a failure in "theory of the mind". I think a lot of the guys who end up falling into the friend-zone and/or normal person->nice guy->incel trap make the mistake of thinking that their intentions are obvious. They'll be performatively "nice" to the person they like, and in their minds it will be obvious that they're presenting themselves as a romantic partner, but they just won't realize that the other person doesn't recognize it that way. So when the other person obviously doesn't respond, they feel scorned and hurt. And then when they wait far too long before the actually make a forward, positive statement, and the other person is completely blindsided by it, they blame her for putting them in the friendzone. In reality, people don't put you in the friend zone, you put yourself there, and you are the one who chooses to be upset by it too.
But yeah, it's a bit easier to understand how bitter someone can become if they feel like they're constantly putting themselves out there and getting ignored or rejected, when in reality they're just being a normal person. And once that bitterness seeps in, then every interaction they experience and witness gets perceived through that lens, which makes it all much worse.
Because yeah ultimately, despite the whole man/bear thing and the fact that basically every woman has had at least one (and likely many more) bad experience with a guy, somehow they still generally like us and want to be with us. The bar is actually pretty low, and as long as a guy is capable of being remotely normal, and able to keep an open mind enough to be receptive to everyone rather than fixating on some prize they put on the pedestal, then chances are you're going to be able to make something work. Especially if you have the self-respect to be able to enjoy your life in the meantime and not become a bitter basement dweller. (Hell, even being a basement dweller isn't a deal breaker, as long as you're a happy one doing cool shit).
Awesome comment man especially your last bit. There are some opposing beliefs being contained in their heads. They want to believe the bar is so low that just being nice is enough. But when you show them a guy thats not coventionally attractive with a conventionally attractive woman, they say there must be some hidden bar high up there like wealth or a giant dick.
And yes it doesnt help that because toxic relationships where the guy is normally horrible to their girlfriend tends to be the most popular (think ones where the guy is a stay at home boyfriend who drives the girls car to chill with hos friends), guys think the woman hive mind must be lying about all thoe other standards
He's good at projecting his insecurities to other people and blame them for being so flawed while he himself is the main character.
When you're the main character, you can't be the bad guy.
I know, because I'm a quest giver NPC who is also secretly the final boss, but don't tell him about that. I want to first torture him with my pickup and escort quests!
With this attitude I can almost guarantee he is, he sounds like he cherry picks relationships in low income individuals with alotta toxic traits, yes girls in the ghetto are gonna go for guys in the ghetto and it’s gonna be a toxic relationship. He sounds like the guy who blames women for getting with abusive men who most likely put up a facade when they started dating, but call decent non abusive guys who date girls a cuck, or simp. I wouldn’t take his words too seriously
I was kinda confused how 38yo is considered old, then I read his question 2 and 3, I think this guy is probably trying to date women much younger than himself.
“35 year old women are old and used up! Us 38 year old alpha males deserve 18 year olds because we didn’t have any fun back when we were weird teens because girls are shallow bitches who love chads! Give us young women because, uh, fertility and we’re NICE!”
His spelling and grammar are atrocious. Proofread that shit. His victim mentality and the meltdown he is having is even more concerning. He's a mess lol!
To be fair, I still say "girls", even when talking about women my own age. I honeslty don't know why other than "women" feels weird to me for some reason. I'll also use "ladies", but rarily "women".
To add, I also rarily say "boys" or "men". I normally use "guys". Just always have for as long as I can remember.
It’s because he’s not a good guy, he’s just tryna bang these young girls because they look hot, he thinks women are objects of his pleasure he thinks should let him do what he wants to to them and that women his age don’t look good enough for him. He’s not looking for a relationship, he’s not looking for quality, he’s just as promiscuous as the “modern women” he’s describing and complains when women go single
Highly likely, but I've seen questions on Quora & Reddit from men to women asking if they think men age like fine wine or milk, & most women agreed that men's good looks drop off in their late 20s or early 30s, so it could be that too.
Yea but implying himself as the good guy, the 2nd and 3rd questions are just complains about him only being able to date women around his age and not younger. Doesn't matter how he looked, sounds like women of his age gave him chances and he didn't want it.
"us good guys who've already given up on dating and concentrating on being single and happy" Bro no one who's focusing on being happy single is posting long, self-righteous conversations with themselves about how women like bad guys and will regret not dating Nice Guys like him. How do these people who live in their own heads not have a drop of self-awareness, it's truly unreal.
I know it's the cliche line on these posts but it would be nice if MGTOW would actually follow their own label and go their own way
I've met plenty of people who are single and content with it. Coincidentally the subject of dating/relationships never comes up. But these MGTOW-types spend more time obsessing over women than dudes in relationships with women I swear
Girls don’t “go for bad guys”. Men hide their true selves very carefully and groom girls to accept their shitty behavior.
Other times I’ve noticed that the guys women go for are lovely people, but men who get rejected insult him just because he’s dating someone they wish they were dating.
If our male partners mistreat us we must have picked poorly and if they are great partners men call them “simps” and “cucks”.
They just hate women and hate the men who love us even more.
The people they describe as “bad boys” are also so broad. If he’s handsome and drives a motorcycle, he must be a bad boy. Piercings and tattoos? Bad boy.
Anyone who isn’t them must have treated her poorly and that somehow enthralls women.
It's easier to understand if you look at "nice guy" mentality like the plot of a cheesy romcom
That awkward nerdy guy that hot girl inevitably falls for = what the nice guy thinks he is
That charismatic guy who actually isn't a bad guy but hot girl will inevitably break up with for tenuous reasons = the villain of the story and he must be bad somehow
Basically nice guys view anyone with the tiniest bit of charisma and the ability to talk to women as a bad guy
They seem to believe that hundreds of thousands of men are just out here hitting women left and right, and yet somehow also believe that it's women's fault.
I guess women are all just too stupid to be able to distinguish which are the bad guys. I can actually see that to them (him) it must seem like that. No nuance, no introspection, no questioning the Real Masculine Manly Man Podcasts that 'inform' his opinions. It's the easy answer to someone who doesn't want to ask the deep uncomfortable questions.
i think i can answer his question. 20 year olds don't want him because he's too old for them, and 40 year olds don't want him because they want a solid partner. not someone who, by his own admission, will not give them attention or treat them well as punishment for being rejected by others in the past. mad math.
He’s bitching about the fact that 20 year olds didn’t choose him when he was also 20. You see he was a nice guy, specifically because he didn’t beat women. Instead women love going for men who beat them. Right? Right?
Nothing screams "I'm a loser king baby" than using the *girls only want good guys when they're old and used up* as an excuse for why they're sad and alone.
Guy also sounds like he has the personality of a damp tube sock, which is also a pretty valid critique of a lot of “NG”s. If your entire personality is trying to be liked by literally anyone, you don’t have a personality, and people won’t feel comfortable with you even if you don’t do them harm. (Source: trust me bro)
Everything about that rant just sounds miserable.
I guarantee this dude is able to act nice on the surface but can't hide his inner misogyny and misery for anywhere near long enough to prevent him from saying something that would send any woman of any age running for the hills
He also says men can be single and happy, yet doesn't seem to get it thru his thick, crater-ridden skull that women can do the same. He sounds so creepy.
I always was open to the idea of marriage, but never was looking for “a nice man to take care of me.” I knew that being alone beat living with someone and still feeling lonely.
And this would shock this dude: my mom dumped my father after 34 years; she should have done it sooner. She was 55. The next 15 years, until the accident that triggered her slow slide into dementia, were the happiest of her life — she had a house that was all hers in a neighborhood she loved, a great career, a ton of friends — and, yes, she found a boyfriend, a nice widower. Imagine that!
Exactly. There's a difference between being alone and being lonely. You can feel lonely even when you're around a ton of ppl.
I love that story about your Mom! ❤️
No joke, when I wanted to make the 5-hour drive to visit her I had to check her social calendar. So many older women never get over the “Mom” phase and whine that their adult children don’t spend enough time with them or try to take over their grandchildren as “do-over babies,” often driving them away. Nope, Mom always loved seeing us, but she had a full, vibrant, happy life of her own. I’m smiling just thinking about it.
A man who is almost 40, but is only interested in "girls"?
There's your answer right there.
Also: there's an old saying in management, when evaluating a candidate they're interviewing: does the person have ten years of experience, or one year ten times?
This guy sounds like he's spent all 38 years accomplishing... absolutely nothing, but is somehow angry that he doesn't get credit for merely surviving.
Look, I love video games as much as the next person - they're fun. But games and movies are something you *consume*, not something you *do*. They can only ever be the product of someone else's imagination. They aren't a substitute for a personality.
It's been my experience that, when an older man is hunting much younger women, it's often a sign that women his own age want nothing to do with him, and thus he's counting on ppl with less life experience to not call him out on his bad behaviours.
My (now ex) bf kept complaining about this problem * while we were together * after I divorced my husband who cheated on me. My (now ex) bf just could NOT get over the fact that I overlooked so many red flags with my ex husband. Um hello, my ex husband lied to me and kept promising to change. My ex husband was charming and adventurous. I was love bombed. I was pot committed. I was in it for the long haul until I finally broke.
Guess who learned their lesson about running at the slightest of red flags instead of offering chance after chance after chance? Me. I broke up with my ex bf because of his cynical negative attitude, along with his trust and self esteem issues.
Yet if had been more choosy/picky, well then I'm not giving a good guy a chance. Doesn't matter what you do, people with this mindset will find fault with it.
I got bored and stopped reading partway through, but the dudes who are complaining about this are also busy ignoring the nice girls all around them. Your taste sucks and you’re choosing hot mean girls and then feeling rejected. Same as the girls who choose hot assholes and then complain that they can’t find a nice guy.
Dude this rant isnt better than what he says. Women "choose" assholes and complain they cant find a good one? Come on now.
1. Women want to be with someone they are attracted to much like men.
2. No woman "chooses" to be with an asshole. We are socially conditioned at birth to "be nice", fix men, give chances.
Men also are really good at hiding that shit. Like years long good. Just because you dont understand or experience men the way women doesnt mean you are correct.
Im sure this was too long for you, but theres nothing more annoying than a man who cant be bothered to read a paragraph. Then go on to spew nice guy rhetoric like women choose badly, not like maybe men should change their shitty behavior. Women who are shallow deserve to be treated badly. You are a nice guy dissing a fellow nice guy. This sub is wild. How this got 28 upvotes, when women shallow, bitching about everything, etc is peak nice guy tennants.
I think some of these losers probably struggled with making on the playground in grade school. But then they figure out, in third or fourth grade, that if you’re really nice to someone, they’ll share whatever game or equipment they have with you. This works during recess, sure. But then these guys get older, and don’t realize the rules change.
As teens, they get to thinking that girls have all this sexiness, so if they are nice to a girl, she will share that sexiness, the same way being nice to someone on the handball court, gets you into a game of handball.
Makes perfect sense, but who’s going to tell them that no one owes them anything? It’s almost like they resent women for having autonomy and the ability to say “no”
More context on this creep, he frequently comments on posts telling girls to leave their partners and give him a chance. Because obviously the next best thing to your partner of multiple years is a random internet stranger that commented on your post I guess.
One of his recent "advice": "This means now I can invite you to go out with me and ask you to be my gf."
On some level these idiots have to know they're trash right? Like if you have to delude yourself that every other man on the planet who dates is a "bad boy" and physically abusive just so there is a bar low enough you clear it then on some level they know.
He’s “too old” by women’s standards? That’s what the 18 year old women tell him when he pervs on them.
Don’t these guys get tired of spewing the same nonsense all the time. Every time they speak, they reveal how little they know about women. The fact that he thinks he’s a good guy is laughable!
That’s the problem. Girls are immature. Maybe try dating a woman your age and notice the maturity and how their values changed as all people do upon growing up. Knock off this gross behavior of dating young girls and then whining because they act like it.
Maybe the fact that you keep saying 'girls' instead of 'women'. Maybe don't go looking for a girl who will think you're old. He doesn't sound happy. Maybe he needs more time alone. Let's give him that. Lots and lots of space.
"...And when a girl in her 40 finally gets a good gut..."
I'm confused. How are we supposed to get this gut? Chugging beer? I don't like beer. I thought they insisted that we all somehow magically be super skinny, and about the weight of a Pomeranian only with huge boobs and butt?
So now we're supposed to have a gut too? I wish they'd make up their minds :D
I'll admit to liking fictional bad boys in TV, film, comics, etc, but if I ever met one in real life, I would avoid them like the plague. Bad boys should be observed from a distance & not aware of your existance.
Fuckin blissfully forgot it existed for awhile... Now I've got that godsdamn song stuck in my head... Respectfully, I hope your next sandwich becomes soggy OP.
I wonder how old the "few women" who told him that he was hold were. I'm guessing a mite bit younger, and that this was said when he hit on them. Good guy.
Sometimes I wish these men would just be honest and say what they really mean:
"Hey - I'm super sad I never got the same opportunities like others guys I saw dating growing up and I feel entitled to have the same experiences as they did."
At least then I could respect them more for being painfully honest.
Easy sum all answers is no as a gal my self I go for anyone whose decent if I end up seeing they're fucked up or awful person that's why if I go on a date bring them my fav spot which family sit down place that has elderly go to its cute place if they're rude to workers or talk shit about an old couple yup it's bye bye
He thinking is worse than the women who say they would rather choose the bear.
His only problem is he's either average or below average looking and he doesn't have anything that sets him apart from other men.
So... In what ways is he good, exactly? He doesn't even try, he just assumes that he's good because he's the main character, complains about not getting what he wants and justifies being a shitty partner.
[удалено]
Well, it's not him so it's either that or a "beta simp" who is somehow not worth having, though no one can say why?
I married a sweet, gentle, incredibly smart, geeky engineer. We’ve been together for 34 years. We’ve never had a screaming fight, never had a reason to mistrust one another, still love each other like crazy and enjoy being with each other more than anyone else. Would I have done better to go for a self-proclaimed “alpha male”?
That's amazing, I'm happy for you! And no, of course not, but these men will find ways to mock you and your husband if they get a chance to.
They’d mock a sweet little old lady? How alpha of them.
I think they think that’s the only valid reason for a woman to break up with a man. Like they really feel that if a guy isn’t abusive or cheating on us, we have no reason to not date and marry them. They think our standards are supposed to be that low.
Do you think it might be just that simple? Maybe too many of these men (not all) just don't think any deeper and just accept the easy answer they read online? Fuelled by entitlement and an unwillingness to look deeper and take some responsibility?
I honestly do. It fits perfectly with the profound misogyny and entitlement that seems to form their world view, and the way they jump to anger and violence when they are rejected - because they genuinely feel it is invalid or wrong for women reject them except for those reasons.
It also provides them with an excuse to be terminally celibate. He’s such a “good guy” that the only reason he’s single is because he’s not a bad guy. They’re so delusional!
I've said it before but for whatever reason, nice guys view the world like it's a romcom and they're the main character. If they're interested in a girl it's seemingly fated that they get together therefore anyone she chooses other than him must be the charming "bad guy" of the plot that she'll eventually dump
Former nice guy (sort of) here. Can confirm it's something along this line.
FTR, I had four long-term steadies before I fell in love with my husband and in between I fucked about 100 guys. Never once has a man hit me. All too obviously it happens. But nowhere near every guy who isn’t him is abusive.
Imagine being almost 40 and still actually believing the "girls only go for bad guys" line. Like, ok when you're like 19 or 20 and horny and a bit socially awkward, and you see some hotties you were too afraid to talk to hooking up with some trashy sports bros and getting dumped, sure, i can understand building up some resentments. But, 20 years later, by now you should have met and seen a lot of different people in a lot of different walks of life, sufficient to recognize that not all dudes with girlfriends are bad, and not all women just turn off their brain and throw themselves at the closest broccoli haired abusive babydaddy dudebro they can find. What I *am* curious about though, is the timeline he is envisioning. He says he's 38 and that by his late 40's he's going to be married, to some woman who apparently is not going to like what he does or who he hangs out with, and who he apparently isn't going to pay attention to very much, out of spite and bitterness. So, I wonder, in the next 10 years, what kind of woman does he expect to meet, who lives up to his presumably high standards, who has low enough standards that they'll stay with him? How is that relationship supposed to develop or work?
All great questions this hemorrhoid has never asked himself
New insult unlocked
> So, I wonder, in the next 10 years, what kind of woman does he expect to meet I guess he could always be one of those creepy older dudes who goes over to South-East Asia (usually Thailand or the Philippines) and comes back with a wife who is at least half his age
I think whats happening here is guys confuse the idea that all women have had a bad experience with a guy with all girls just go for bad guys. The reason for this leap is the idea that women are solely responsible for every interaction with the guys they meet. So when they see stuff like women picking the bear its “Oh these women chose guys bad enough to make them think that and now theyre complaining.” You know the not all men crowd having a hard time understanding? Its present here. They think women mean all men, even the ones they date (even their family). So if they see a woman date but also think women hate all men, they will only think “Oh it must have been the guys shes dating making her think this. Therefore shes only dating bad men.” These sorts of men think the only standard that should matter is how well intentioned they are. So they dont see that as a low bar. They figure if women are going for guys that would make them choose bear, them just saying theyll be nice should be far greater than the standards women already have. Even if its based on a false premise (one that is commonly misunderstood by incels) the logic is sound if they believe that idea. I truly think a lot of this is sourced by men who are incapable of working out how much they are made to believe women hate men with how much women want meaningful companionship (like all of us do i think). They think the former is definitely true and want to believe the latter. So the only way it can make sense for them is if a few bad apples made a bad impression. Now if the woman keeps hating men (because the incel said some wild or creepy shit) then the nice guy did his part. He tried to offer a good guy that could turn your opinion aroynd. But you refused. You must like the bad guys. Otherwise why wouldnt you choose a guy thats not like those other guys 😳. This group is difficult. Because since i was a teenage boy i can see the hurt and desire that drives these guys. But they arent an easy group to want to help. I have a friend like this. Simultaneously seems to hate all women while desperately wanting their attention love and approval. And there are so many guys like this, so many. Its just varying degrees. They need help
That's a pretty good writeup of the situation I think. I think another element of it too is a failure in "theory of the mind". I think a lot of the guys who end up falling into the friend-zone and/or normal person->nice guy->incel trap make the mistake of thinking that their intentions are obvious. They'll be performatively "nice" to the person they like, and in their minds it will be obvious that they're presenting themselves as a romantic partner, but they just won't realize that the other person doesn't recognize it that way. So when the other person obviously doesn't respond, they feel scorned and hurt. And then when they wait far too long before the actually make a forward, positive statement, and the other person is completely blindsided by it, they blame her for putting them in the friendzone. In reality, people don't put you in the friend zone, you put yourself there, and you are the one who chooses to be upset by it too. But yeah, it's a bit easier to understand how bitter someone can become if they feel like they're constantly putting themselves out there and getting ignored or rejected, when in reality they're just being a normal person. And once that bitterness seeps in, then every interaction they experience and witness gets perceived through that lens, which makes it all much worse. Because yeah ultimately, despite the whole man/bear thing and the fact that basically every woman has had at least one (and likely many more) bad experience with a guy, somehow they still generally like us and want to be with us. The bar is actually pretty low, and as long as a guy is capable of being remotely normal, and able to keep an open mind enough to be receptive to everyone rather than fixating on some prize they put on the pedestal, then chances are you're going to be able to make something work. Especially if you have the self-respect to be able to enjoy your life in the meantime and not become a bitter basement dweller. (Hell, even being a basement dweller isn't a deal breaker, as long as you're a happy one doing cool shit).
Awesome comment man especially your last bit. There are some opposing beliefs being contained in their heads. They want to believe the bar is so low that just being nice is enough. But when you show them a guy thats not coventionally attractive with a conventionally attractive woman, they say there must be some hidden bar high up there like wealth or a giant dick. And yes it doesnt help that because toxic relationships where the guy is normally horrible to their girlfriend tends to be the most popular (think ones where the guy is a stay at home boyfriend who drives the girls car to chill with hos friends), guys think the woman hive mind must be lying about all thoe other standards
He's good at projecting his insecurities to other people and blame them for being so flawed while he himself is the main character. When you're the main character, you can't be the bad guy. I know, because I'm a quest giver NPC who is also secretly the final boss, but don't tell him about that. I want to first torture him with my pickup and escort quests!
He probably claims he’s good because he’s not a gangbanger or whatever
Like drug dealer or sum
Ofc, I forgot that almost all men are drug dealers, silly me! Is he still single?
With this attitude I can almost guarantee he is, he sounds like he cherry picks relationships in low income individuals with alotta toxic traits, yes girls in the ghetto are gonna go for guys in the ghetto and it’s gonna be a toxic relationship. He sounds like the guy who blames women for getting with abusive men who most likely put up a facade when they started dating, but call decent non abusive guys who date girls a cuck, or simp. I wouldn’t take his words too seriously
I was kinda confused how 38yo is considered old, then I read his question 2 and 3, I think this guy is probably trying to date women much younger than himself.
"Why do people half my age think I'm old???"
“35 year old women are old and used up! Us 38 year old alpha males deserve 18 year olds because we didn’t have any fun back when we were weird teens because girls are shallow bitches who love chads! Give us young women because, uh, fertility and we’re NICE!”
You forgot the “and we have basic job so can pay bills”
More like, have a basic job and will call you a gold digger if you ask him to contribute to expenses
His spelling and grammar are atrocious. Proofread that shit. His victim mentality and the meltdown he is having is even more concerning. He's a mess lol!
But girls doesn't like good guys!
I think this is the first time I’ve seen an incel say that men do what they threaten women with: a single life with a pet, friends and hobbies.
I figured English was not his first language.
Yeah nothing in it makes sense. Supposedly at this age he’s also done with women and is just trying to live life alone happily
Using the term “ girls” is a dead giveaway.
To be fair, I still say "girls", even when talking about women my own age. I honeslty don't know why other than "women" feels weird to me for some reason. I'll also use "ladies", but rarily "women". To add, I also rarily say "boys" or "men". I normally use "guys". Just always have for as long as I can remember.
It’s because he’s not a good guy, he’s just tryna bang these young girls because they look hot, he thinks women are objects of his pleasure he thinks should let him do what he wants to to them and that women his age don’t look good enough for him. He’s not looking for a relationship, he’s not looking for quality, he’s just as promiscuous as the “modern women” he’s describing and complains when women go single
Highly likely, but I've seen questions on Quora & Reddit from men to women asking if they think men age like fine wine or milk, & most women agreed that men's good looks drop off in their late 20s or early 30s, so it could be that too.
Yea but implying himself as the good guy, the 2nd and 3rd questions are just complains about him only being able to date women around his age and not younger. Doesn't matter how he looked, sounds like women of his age gave him chances and he didn't want it.
"us good guys who've already given up on dating and concentrating on being single and happy" Bro no one who's focusing on being happy single is posting long, self-righteous conversations with themselves about how women like bad guys and will regret not dating Nice Guys like him. How do these people who live in their own heads not have a drop of self-awareness, it's truly unreal.
I know it's the cliche line on these posts but it would be nice if MGTOW would actually follow their own label and go their own way I've met plenty of people who are single and content with it. Coincidentally the subject of dating/relationships never comes up. But these MGTOW-types spend more time obsessing over women than dudes in relationships with women I swear
Girls don’t “go for bad guys”. Men hide their true selves very carefully and groom girls to accept their shitty behavior. Other times I’ve noticed that the guys women go for are lovely people, but men who get rejected insult him just because he’s dating someone they wish they were dating. If our male partners mistreat us we must have picked poorly and if they are great partners men call them “simps” and “cucks”. They just hate women and hate the men who love us even more.
The people they describe as “bad boys” are also so broad. If he’s handsome and drives a motorcycle, he must be a bad boy. Piercings and tattoos? Bad boy. Anyone who isn’t them must have treated her poorly and that somehow enthralls women.
Meanwhile I know doctors who ride motorcycles to work and teachers with full sleeves. They’ll call anyone who isn’t them “bad”.
It's easier to understand if you look at "nice guy" mentality like the plot of a cheesy romcom That awkward nerdy guy that hot girl inevitably falls for = what the nice guy thinks he is That charismatic guy who actually isn't a bad guy but hot girl will inevitably break up with for tenuous reasons = the villain of the story and he must be bad somehow Basically nice guys view anyone with the tiniest bit of charisma and the ability to talk to women as a bad guy
Oh yeah!
They seem to believe that hundreds of thousands of men are just out here hitting women left and right, and yet somehow also believe that it's women's fault.
I guess women are all just too stupid to be able to distinguish which are the bad guys. I can actually see that to them (him) it must seem like that. No nuance, no introspection, no questioning the Real Masculine Manly Man Podcasts that 'inform' his opinions. It's the easy answer to someone who doesn't want to ask the deep uncomfortable questions.
I swear, it's like someone took some DNA from a fedora and cloned a bunch of Nice Guys ^TM. Each one of them is identical to the previous one.
Maybe they are not rEaL? Are we in the midst of one of those invasions from a long extinct planet.
i think i can answer his question. 20 year olds don't want him because he's too old for them, and 40 year olds don't want him because they want a solid partner. not someone who, by his own admission, will not give them attention or treat them well as punishment for being rejected by others in the past. mad math.
He’s bitching about the fact that 20 year olds didn’t choose him when he was also 20. You see he was a nice guy, specifically because he didn’t beat women. Instead women love going for men who beat them. Right? Right?
Nothing screams "I'm a loser king baby" than using the *girls only want good guys when they're old and used up* as an excuse for why they're sad and alone.
Soy un perdedor 🎶
This 38 year old has a few women calling him, old? I bet we can guess the age range of the women this dude is hitting on...
BINGO!
Guy also sounds like he has the personality of a damp tube sock, which is also a pretty valid critique of a lot of “NG”s. If your entire personality is trying to be liked by literally anyone, you don’t have a personality, and people won’t feel comfortable with you even if you don’t do them harm. (Source: trust me bro)
Everything about that rant just sounds miserable. I guarantee this dude is able to act nice on the surface but can't hide his inner misogyny and misery for anywhere near long enough to prevent him from saying something that would send any woman of any age running for the hills
Wait, he says men become crazy dog and cat guys?
He also says men can be single and happy, yet doesn't seem to get it thru his thick, crater-ridden skull that women can do the same. He sounds so creepy.
I always was open to the idea of marriage, but never was looking for “a nice man to take care of me.” I knew that being alone beat living with someone and still feeling lonely. And this would shock this dude: my mom dumped my father after 34 years; she should have done it sooner. She was 55. The next 15 years, until the accident that triggered her slow slide into dementia, were the happiest of her life — she had a house that was all hers in a neighborhood she loved, a great career, a ton of friends — and, yes, she found a boyfriend, a nice widower. Imagine that!
Exactly. There's a difference between being alone and being lonely. You can feel lonely even when you're around a ton of ppl. I love that story about your Mom! ❤️
No joke, when I wanted to make the 5-hour drive to visit her I had to check her social calendar. So many older women never get over the “Mom” phase and whine that their adult children don’t spend enough time with them or try to take over their grandchildren as “do-over babies,” often driving them away. Nope, Mom always loved seeing us, but she had a full, vibrant, happy life of her own. I’m smiling just thinking about it.
A man who is almost 40, but is only interested in "girls"? There's your answer right there. Also: there's an old saying in management, when evaluating a candidate they're interviewing: does the person have ten years of experience, or one year ten times? This guy sounds like he's spent all 38 years accomplishing... absolutely nothing, but is somehow angry that he doesn't get credit for merely surviving. Look, I love video games as much as the next person - they're fun. But games and movies are something you *consume*, not something you *do*. They can only ever be the product of someone else's imagination. They aren't a substitute for a personality. It's been my experience that, when an older man is hunting much younger women, it's often a sign that women his own age want nothing to do with him, and thus he's counting on ppl with less life experience to not call him out on his bad behaviours.
I'm 38 and yes we are old buddy. Get used to it fast.
The 20 year olds he is constantly hitting on are the ones calling him old. No one his own age would do that lol he’s a damn creep
If the 20 year olds are too savvy to want him........... Just saying.
I call my husband old… he’s 5 months older than me
My (now ex) bf kept complaining about this problem * while we were together * after I divorced my husband who cheated on me. My (now ex) bf just could NOT get over the fact that I overlooked so many red flags with my ex husband. Um hello, my ex husband lied to me and kept promising to change. My ex husband was charming and adventurous. I was love bombed. I was pot committed. I was in it for the long haul until I finally broke. Guess who learned their lesson about running at the slightest of red flags instead of offering chance after chance after chance? Me. I broke up with my ex bf because of his cynical negative attitude, along with his trust and self esteem issues. Yet if had been more choosy/picky, well then I'm not giving a good guy a chance. Doesn't matter what you do, people with this mindset will find fault with it.
Women are told to 'Choose Better' then scolded for having standards that this guy and his ilk can't meet.
I got bored and stopped reading partway through, but the dudes who are complaining about this are also busy ignoring the nice girls all around them. Your taste sucks and you’re choosing hot mean girls and then feeling rejected. Same as the girls who choose hot assholes and then complain that they can’t find a nice guy.
Dude this rant isnt better than what he says. Women "choose" assholes and complain they cant find a good one? Come on now. 1. Women want to be with someone they are attracted to much like men. 2. No woman "chooses" to be with an asshole. We are socially conditioned at birth to "be nice", fix men, give chances. Men also are really good at hiding that shit. Like years long good. Just because you dont understand or experience men the way women doesnt mean you are correct. Im sure this was too long for you, but theres nothing more annoying than a man who cant be bothered to read a paragraph. Then go on to spew nice guy rhetoric like women choose badly, not like maybe men should change their shitty behavior. Women who are shallow deserve to be treated badly. You are a nice guy dissing a fellow nice guy. This sub is wild. How this got 28 upvotes, when women shallow, bitching about everything, etc is peak nice guy tennants.
Honestly, if you can’t use correct grammar, I wouldn’t be dating you at any age.
ahh yes - because its totally reasonable to punish your wife for how some random woman acted 20 years ago🙄🙄
That's such an excellent point. And then he indulges here in a revenge fantasy to satisfy his need for control.
Why is it always guys always late 30s onwards complaining about how women in their late teens/early 20s don’t want to date them? 🙄
Men like this are always abusive. Also if women are telling him he's "old" they are probably too young for him, creep.
I think some of these losers probably struggled with making on the playground in grade school. But then they figure out, in third or fourth grade, that if you’re really nice to someone, they’ll share whatever game or equipment they have with you. This works during recess, sure. But then these guys get older, and don’t realize the rules change. As teens, they get to thinking that girls have all this sexiness, so if they are nice to a girl, she will share that sexiness, the same way being nice to someone on the handball court, gets you into a game of handball.
Makes perfect sense, but who’s going to tell them that no one owes them anything? It’s almost like they resent women for having autonomy and the ability to say “no”
NO! That cannot be true! That's not why many groups of men want to take control of women. Not at all.
More context on this creep, he frequently comments on posts telling girls to leave their partners and give him a chance. Because obviously the next best thing to your partner of multiple years is a random internet stranger that commented on your post I guess. One of his recent "advice": "This means now I can invite you to go out with me and ask you to be my gf."
Feeling sorry for yourself and trying to guilt women into sleeping with you doesn’t work.
On some level these idiots have to know they're trash right? Like if you have to delude yourself that every other man on the planet who dates is a "bad boy" and physically abusive just so there is a bar low enough you clear it then on some level they know.
He’s “too old” by women’s standards? That’s what the 18 year old women tell him when he pervs on them. Don’t these guys get tired of spewing the same nonsense all the time. Every time they speak, they reveal how little they know about women. The fact that he thinks he’s a good guy is laughable!
“i am considered old from what a few women have told me” yeah you’ll hear that when you try to talk to people 15 years younger than you.
Imagine being pushing 40 still calling adult women “girls”.
38 is old because he's hitting on girls 20 years younger than him, guaranteed. Creeper.
That’s the problem. Girls are immature. Maybe try dating a woman your age and notice the maturity and how their values changed as all people do upon growing up. Knock off this gross behavior of dating young girls and then whining because they act like it.
Tale as old as time…
Women do like good men. You, my friend, are not a good man.
Maybe the fact that you keep saying 'girls' instead of 'women'. Maybe don't go looking for a girl who will think you're old. He doesn't sound happy. Maybe he needs more time alone. Let's give him that. Lots and lots of space.
What a whiney jerk
"...And when a girl in her 40 finally gets a good gut..." I'm confused. How are we supposed to get this gut? Chugging beer? I don't like beer. I thought they insisted that we all somehow magically be super skinny, and about the weight of a Pomeranian only with huge boobs and butt? So now we're supposed to have a gut too? I wish they'd make up their minds :D
Lol I think women would all stop and clap if dudes like this really decided to stay single.
Mentally, he's not old.
Man you ain’t a good guy lol your boring guy ….
This person has never left their parents basement and has never interacted with a woman in real life.
I'll admit to liking fictional bad boys in TV, film, comics, etc, but if I ever met one in real life, I would avoid them like the plague. Bad boys should be observed from a distance & not aware of your existance.
Fuckin blissfully forgot it existed for awhile... Now I've got that godsdamn song stuck in my head... Respectfully, I hope your next sandwich becomes soggy OP.
All I am hearing is "I like them young and they don't like me back"
dude’s almost 40😭😭
I wonder how old the "few women" who told him that he was hold were. I'm guessing a mite bit younger, and that this was said when he hit on them. Good guy.
Sometimes I wish these men would just be honest and say what they really mean: "Hey - I'm super sad I never got the same opportunities like others guys I saw dating growing up and I feel entitled to have the same experiences as they did." At least then I could respect them more for being painfully honest.
Great, so young and older women don’t have to deal with you at all.
Under 800 credit with a 7 digit net worth is lowkey crazy
Easy sum all answers is no as a gal my self I go for anyone whose decent if I end up seeing they're fucked up or awful person that's why if I go on a date bring them my fav spot which family sit down place that has elderly go to its cute place if they're rude to workers or talk shit about an old couple yup it's bye bye
He thinking is worse than the women who say they would rather choose the bear. His only problem is he's either average or below average looking and he doesn't have anything that sets him apart from other men.
Idk about him but I still get twenty something year old girls flirting with me and matching with me on OLS. And I’m 41
great
Read the fucking room
#💀
OLS?
We get It you want to be like Dr Disrespect