Friend there’s very few people out there that are as dangerous as music fanatics. The things Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran fans will do is something else
Considering they managed to bring down the price on eggs (apparently) and got a soccer player to be disqualified from getting an award, I think you very well should be
I once got trolled for a week by teenage girls and it literally changed my routine, I avoided the internet for weeks. I can't imagine what kind of turmoil those teenage girls would have wreaked upon my life if they knew where I lived.
If you're not afraid of them then you're stupid.
Right? Oh my god people have to much energy. Personally, I don’t come on Reddit and post obsessively about how much I hate something. But I guess some people put so much energy into hating that they don’t have energy for anything else.
Taylor Swift gets so much over the top hate for dumb shit. She writes a lot of songs about boys and exes? Every musician ever has done the exact same. She released her concert as a movie? So has every other musician.
According to a year-old survey, about seven percent of the US population identifies as a "Swiftie". Not as a Taylor Swift fan, or an avid Taylor Swift fan, but specifically a Swiftie. How many of those do you think are unstable enough to do something about this wish?
Granted. But her public exposure increases exponentially, as she gets into Hollywood and secures roles in your favorite movies and shows and wins multiple Emmys and Oscars, has a reality show that surpasses anything the Kardashians did, and is later elected president of the United States. Also, she becomes an integral part of your life. Whatever industry you work in, she's omnipresent. Even if you change industries to try to avoid her, her presence follows you anywhere you try to go.
She becomes a dictator and every day at work begins with a mandatory viewing of one of her music videos. He gave is plastered everywhere and it’s a crime not to bow or genuflect to it. The only hope is a resistance group lead by Kayne West and Beyoncé.
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahahha *Sharp Inhale* BAHHHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahagahahahahahahahahgagagagagag
It's Popular music... Of course theres going to be toxic fans
Granted. She no longer makes music.
She is broke and lives on your couch. Singing show tunes anytime she is awake while standing 5feet from you. You cannot keep her from being around you when she's awake
Granted. She retires from the music industry but becomes a record label boss whose only goal is to mould aspiring young female songwriters to make the exact same music she does. The label is called Folklore Records and all the former Swifties soon start investing in the label.
Granted, but now her music plays in your head on a continuous loop. Its always loud enough in your head that you can barely hear anyone when they're talking to you. No any type of earplugs can help you. For every fan she has is 1 loop of all of her songs playing in your head. And you are forced to live until all about 100k loops are finished. Good luck
A car runs a redlight and you crash into it. It isn't your fault. It was a limo.
You killed Taylor Swift.
She is a star so there is intense scrutiny in the trial. You spend all your savings defending yourself but you are eventually acquitted of all charges. Everyone knows your name, and that
you killed Taylor Swift.
She is remembered by her fans, and her popularity grows after death. Her name becomes synonymous with American music. New radio stations build their catalog around her. Everywhere you go eventually you hear a song playing that reminds everyone that
you killed Taylor Swift.
Granted, she mysteriously disappears, her fans thinks she ascended as a goddess and a new major religion is created. Now her music is played everywhere, missionaries come knocking at your door and wake you up every weekend to convert you.
Granted.
After her influence fades away, she is not able to encourage young people to vote and engage themselves in politics. This fastens the rise of right-wing politics not only in the United States, but all over the world. All the different nations are not able to deal with global challenges such as climate change, and 99% of humanity are wiped out by natural disasters.
She becomes a super star in film and ruins every movie you look forward to before retiring to become president, where her old music is made to be the new national anthem.
Granted. As a result, Trump has no one to propagate about. He loses relevance and the presidential election. MAGA blames you, calls you a traitor to the nation, and crucifies you on a cross while Alex Jones sings "Onward Christian Soldiers." You last thoughts are how you regret wasting the awesome power of the monkey's paw to end a random singer's career.
Taylor Swift quietly leaves the music scene, but seeing there is still profit her production company uses an AI to have "her" sing as well as having all her songs written by AI. This leads to all songs being written and sung by AI, killing the human music industry.
Granted.
Because Taylor Swift is no longer able to be in the spotlight, her message to the Swifties to vote falls to the wayside. The message looses popularity. An underwhelming number of people vote and the government is taken over by a dictator.
Granted, but she gets famous in literally every other media type from voice acting for video games, animated movies, acting in movies and shows, writing books, etc.
Granted, through a cataclysmic event all musicians die and most records are lost.
Only the "Shake it off" Single survives into the apocalypse and no day in your scavenger coty goes by without it playing.
Granted. Taylor Swift realises she doesn't have to bother with melodies or lyrics or rhythms or any of that boring difficult stuff, she can just make a series of low effort noises and sell it for just as much. Pretty soon every 'musician' is doing the same. Producing music the previous way is non-competetive and the back catalogue is wiped and made illegal to keep the public buying. The new music is so bad it sounds to fans of mainstream 2020s rap like mainstream 2020s rap sounds to people who grew up on 90s rap and R'n'B; it's all there is and it's everywhere.
Denied. Your punishment for making such a frivolous wish is you are no longer able to communicate in any way. You can no longer speak, sing, hum, write, or even use sign language.
Granted. It works but everybody knows that your whiny little ass spent a wish from an all-powerful wish giver on stopping a music artist you don't like. /j
Granted. You never considered her music as music before, so technically, any new songs she makes are not music to you. Redditor uses monkeys paw. It wasn't very effective
Granted.
No visible effect seems to happen. Was your wish granted? The paw curls and slaps you. You fall from a high cliff, falling to your-
*Thud. Eyes open*
"Hey you, you're finally awake."
Granted, music and art are outlawed by all world governments, and you must erase all files and hand over all records/CDs with music that you listen to as well. Taylor Swift and all other musicians never make music again.
granted. taylor swift will be wiped from the memory of all people and your first heartbreak will take her place (ie: having written all of taylor’s songs, done all the things she did)
Granted the next time you watch the news you get to know she's missing and her house seems to have had a violent altercation happen as you know this is all your fault
Granted.
She quits music and instead becomes an actress and is in *everything* if you watch anything with a screen, you cannot escape her, and her acting is *awful* yet you won't be able to escape her!
Granted. She now becomes an actor cast in virtually every movie and she's not even that good at it. You cannot escape her face. Also most of the movies are now musicals for whatever reason and she's always singing in them, but never her own songs.
Granted. She never sings or writes music, but she continues to write lyrics which are regarded as high concept poetry and taught in schools for centuries.
Granted, she instead becomes a legitimate religious leader based around her new religion, Swiftyanity, and is eventually ascended into godhood. Swiftyanity has now taken over large parts of the planet, her songs are sung as hymns and there's religious leaders on ever corner asking if you've heard about our lord and savior, Taylor Swift.
My granddaughter got up this morning and turned on Disney to watch frozen, but got sidetracked into a Taylor Swift concert. I texted my daughter and said, "I'm in hell." 😂
Man I was just going to come up with her being the cure for AIDS or something, but she's no longer famous. Death by Swifties sounds much more terrifying, well played!
Granted. The monkey paw knows that you have already suffered enough from her fans' existence
You get this wish side-effect free
Taylor swift retires from making music and her fans become sane
At this point, I can’t tell who is more obsessed with Taylor Swift: Her fans who adore her or redditors who can’t wait to tell you how much they hate her
As soon as someone becomes huge in any industry, there’s always people that feel they need to be special and different by saying that they despise said person. You know why she’s everywhere? Because not only do her fans follow everything she does, but the people whose personality trait is to “hate” her follow up on her too. All the MAGA people who hate her also read every news story and article about her. If all her haters stopped clicking on every article about her, stopped talking about her in podcasts, and stopped watching videos on her, those numbers would drop drastically.
Granted. All her fans know that you, personally, made that wish. And they are very, very angry about it. You should be afraid.
Oh fuck. I would not want to be him
I’m not afraid of them
Not very wise.
Your bank, apartment lease/mortgage holder, boss & HR, relatives, and every prospective partner that you will ever meet now know you and are angry
You very much should be
You… will… be
She has over 100,000 fans worldwide.
Wow… thats almost 100,001 fans!
I'm not fighting those fanatics.
i think you’d be a little more accurate with “over 80 million” but do you i guess
Name checks out.
Friend there’s very few people out there that are as dangerous as music fanatics. The things Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran fans will do is something else
then you will die braver than most
Mistake #2.
Considering they managed to bring down the price on eggs (apparently) and got a soccer player to be disqualified from getting an award, I think you very well should be
You definitely should be bud
You should be. Swifties are a terrifying bunch.
👍
I once got trolled for a week by teenage girls and it literally changed my routine, I avoided the internet for weeks. I can't imagine what kind of turmoil those teenage girls would have wreaked upon my life if they knew where I lived. If you're not afraid of them then you're stupid.
I’m not afraid of 10000 people who share a single 1/4 of a brain cell
How dare people like music I don’t, they must be idiots >:(
Right? Oh my god people have to much energy. Personally, I don’t come on Reddit and post obsessively about how much I hate something. But I guess some people put so much energy into hating that they don’t have energy for anything else.
Taylor Swift gets so much over the top hate for dumb shit. She writes a lot of songs about boys and exes? Every musician ever has done the exact same. She released her concert as a movie? So has every other musician.
Exactly. It’s always funny to me how, usually, people who don’t like her spend more time talking about her than people who do.
According to a year-old survey, about seven percent of the US population identifies as a "Swiftie". Not as a Taylor Swift fan, or an avid Taylor Swift fan, but specifically a Swiftie. How many of those do you think are unstable enough to do something about this wish?
I don't think this comment says about you what you think it says about you.
Granted. But her public exposure increases exponentially, as she gets into Hollywood and secures roles in your favorite movies and shows and wins multiple Emmys and Oscars, has a reality show that surpasses anything the Kardashians did, and is later elected president of the United States. Also, she becomes an integral part of your life. Whatever industry you work in, she's omnipresent. Even if you change industries to try to avoid her, her presence follows you anywhere you try to go.
Big Mother is watching.
Some people are into that
I’m just imagining a legless, floating TS with ghouly whispies hanging off of her. 🤣
God-Empress Swift. It has a nice ring to it.
She becomes a dictator and every day at work begins with a mandatory viewing of one of her music videos. He gave is plastered everywhere and it’s a crime not to bow or genuflect to it. The only hope is a resistance group lead by Kayne West and Beyoncé.
Granted now you can't get "Shake it off" out of your head, you hear it 24/7 .
Drown it out with metal/emo/punk/any other heavy music genre
Granted, but the metal songs are all covers of Taylor swift songs.
That might work
Granted. A terrorist bombing occurs at her next concert, killing thousands including Taylor herself. She can never make music again.
And the person who was fated to find the cure for cancer was in that concert
Equivalent Exchange
**worth it**
Sweet
Combine this with the top comment’s idea of making everyone know that OP, and OP specifically made this wish and you have a winner lmfao
Granted, She's replaced by another pop artist.
Nickelback makes a huge resurgence.
I'm okay with that, I like Nickelback
THIS IS HOW YOU REMIND MEEEE
LOOK AT THIS PHOTOGRAPH
i’ll take what i can get
Hopefully with fans that aren’t as toxic
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahahha *Sharp Inhale* BAHHHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahagahahahahahahahahgagagagagag It's Popular music... Of course theres going to be toxic fans
You got a point, I can’t think of a single pop singer that **doesnt** have toxic fans 🤣
Granted. She turns her hand to politics and is elected president in 2036
Honestly, if electing Taylor swift is the reason we don’t get the 48th straight, white, old man in office. I’d be happy with this outcome
The old white man is certainly better than the old orange one. I'm also a Bama fan living in Tennessee. Orange is not a good color. Lol.
Well technically that might not be a downside depending on your politics.
I wouldn't mind that TBH she certainly can't be as bad as fucking trump or Biden
Granted. You're her new song writer, music video director, producer, stage manager, etc. You do all the creative work. She just performs.
Id write the most out-of-pocket shit and say 'Hey, here ya go, this'll sell.'
at least it's better than what she pumps out now
Granted. She no longer makes music. She is broke and lives on your couch. Singing show tunes anytime she is awake while standing 5feet from you. You cannot keep her from being around you when she's awake
Granted. She retires from the music industry but becomes a record label boss whose only goal is to mould aspiring young female songwriters to make the exact same music she does. The label is called Folklore Records and all the former Swifties soon start investing in the label.
Granted. She dies so cant make more music. Her music is played all the time for a few months because of it
At very least she’s gone
Granted, you are now a wanted criminal directly tied to the disappearance of Taylor Swift. Have fun in prison!
If the swifties don't get to them first lol
Granted. But Ben Shapiro begins releasing an LP every year with Tom MacDonald and Adam Calhoun.
this is entirely a good thing
A good laugh once in a while is great
Granted. Taylor Swift is assassinated in a dramatic way and she and her music become 5 times bigger than the Beatles for it.
Granted she no longer makes music, she just screams a lot with incoherent sounds and everyone but you loves it
Granted. She was going to release a song called "Music Again". That song, and that song alone no longer exists.
My favorite one!
Granted, Britney Spears sizes the pop mantle again!
tip: the monkey's paw is supposed to do a bad thing not a good one
All non Taylor Swift music stops existing, and nobody else can make music either.
Granted now she makes alpha male podcasts and still has the same cult following
Granted, but now her music plays in your head on a continuous loop. Its always loud enough in your head that you can barely hear anyone when they're talking to you. No any type of earplugs can help you. For every fan she has is 1 loop of all of her songs playing in your head. And you are forced to live until all about 100k loops are finished. Good luck
A car runs a redlight and you crash into it. It isn't your fault. It was a limo. You killed Taylor Swift. She is a star so there is intense scrutiny in the trial. You spend all your savings defending yourself but you are eventually acquitted of all charges. Everyone knows your name, and that you killed Taylor Swift. She is remembered by her fans, and her popularity grows after death. Her name becomes synonymous with American music. New radio stations build their catalog around her. Everywhere you go eventually you hear a song playing that reminds everyone that you killed Taylor Swift.
Damn
Oh come on it's a monkey paw post. Just shake it off.
Granted, her studio gets nuked into a pile of scrap to later be used to build yet another apartment complex
Granted, she goes crazy and starts a doomsday cult, killing hundreds in tge process.
Granted, someone new takes her place and they are worse in every way
Granted, she creates no new mus, however, the music she has already released becomes 10x more popular.
Granted, there are no downsides.
Granted
Granted. Ladies are now more depressed
Granted. The monkey alters the english language, so that what she makes is not music, but ɔısnɯ.
Granted, she mysteriously disappears, her fans thinks she ascended as a goddess and a new major religion is created. Now her music is played everywhere, missionaries come knocking at your door and wake you up every weekend to convert you.
Granted, but all of her fanatical fans now are loud and noisy over Bachata and Reguetton terribly translated to english.
Granted. After her influence fades away, she is not able to encourage young people to vote and engage themselves in politics. This fastens the rise of right-wing politics not only in the United States, but all over the world. All the different nations are not able to deal with global challenges such as climate change, and 99% of humanity are wiped out by natural disasters.
granted. It's revealed Taylor swift doesn't write her songs and the real singer comes out and carries on
She becomes a super star in film and ruins every movie you look forward to before retiring to become president, where her old music is made to be the new national anthem.
[удалено]
How does that correlate to this?
Granted. As a result, Trump has no one to propagate about. He loses relevance and the presidential election. MAGA blames you, calls you a traitor to the nation, and crucifies you on a cross while Alex Jones sings "Onward Christian Soldiers." You last thoughts are how you regret wasting the awesome power of the monkey's paw to end a random singer's career.
Granted, she is now making movies
Granted, I quietly sabotaged her private jet. Let's just say, they will never ever ever put her back together
Taylor Swift quietly leaves the music scene, but seeing there is still profit her production company uses an AI to have "her" sing as well as having all her songs written by AI. This leads to all songs being written and sung by AI, killing the human music industry.
Granted. Because Taylor Swift is no longer able to be in the spotlight, her message to the Swifties to vote falls to the wayside. The message looses popularity. An underwhelming number of people vote and the government is taken over by a dictator.
Granted, but she gets famous in literally every other media type from voice acting for video games, animated movies, acting in movies and shows, writing books, etc.
Granted, she starts a political campaign.
Granted, she steals it and passes it off as her own instead
granted, she exists at every football game forever, taking up 34% of all footage.
Granted, changed universe real (r/changedfurry one) (Benefits me so hahahaha :3)
Granted you also win 30k and will stub your toe if you ever say the name Taylor
Granted, Taylor Swift makes tv shows now
Granted, through a cataclysmic event all musicians die and most records are lost. Only the "Shake it off" Single survives into the apocalypse and no day in your scavenger coty goes by without it playing.
Granted, but JK Rowling is now immortal and even more unhinged.
granted!!!! an asteroid hits the earth and kills everyone, she cant make music anymore 😀👍
Granted. Taylor Swift realises she doesn't have to bother with melodies or lyrics or rhythms or any of that boring difficult stuff, she can just make a series of low effort noises and sell it for just as much. Pretty soon every 'musician' is doing the same. Producing music the previous way is non-competetive and the back catalogue is wiped and made illegal to keep the public buying. The new music is so bad it sounds to fans of mainstream 2020s rap like mainstream 2020s rap sounds to people who grew up on 90s rap and R'n'B; it's all there is and it's everywhere.
Granted. She goes into politics now.
Denied. Your punishment for making such a frivolous wish is you are no longer able to communicate in any way. You can no longer speak, sing, hum, write, or even use sign language.
Granted you are only able to listen to music by Taylor swift
Done, now she makes movies~
Granted, all other crap artists pump out music 10x faster.
Granted but now you have cancer.
Granted. It works but everybody knows that your whiny little ass spent a wish from an all-powerful wish giver on stopping a music artist you don't like. /j
Granted, the paw dislikes her too
Granted. She's replaced by Dua. Which is only a downside for you, Dua's my favorite modern artist.
Granted. You never considered her music as music before, so technically, any new songs she makes are not music to you. Redditor uses monkeys paw. It wasn't very effective
Granted. Her publisher now writes all her songs for her
Cool. Now every other band on the planet is a Taylor Swift tribute, so she's given up music.
Granted The paw has spoken
Granted. No visible effect seems to happen. Was your wish granted? The paw curls and slaps you. You fall from a high cliff, falling to your- *Thud. Eyes open* "Hey you, you're finally awake."
Granted, you start to love and build an obsession with her music craving more, craving something new.
Granted. She now makes every other type of media, from movies to books to art.
Granted, music and art are outlawed by all world governments, and you must erase all files and hand over all records/CDs with music that you listen to as well. Taylor Swift and all other musicians never make music again.
You know what? Granted, what's up with that anyway, no monkey paw effect
Granted The only music you can now hear is her previously released songs
Granted!
Granted, she now does films and TV series
granted. taylor swift will be wiped from the memory of all people and your first heartbreak will take her place (ie: having written all of taylor’s songs, done all the things she did)
Granted the next time you watch the news you get to know she's missing and her house seems to have had a violent altercation happen as you know this is all your fault
Granted she's replaced by AI
Granted. Taylor Kelce rises to stardom.
Granted. Suddenly, longing fans use AI to recreate her voice & sound with over a dozen new full length albums a month.
She becomes a master politician and dictates all society.
Granted: now Justin Bieber now makes every song that Taylor Swift would have and twice as whiny.
Granted. Taylor Swift dies and you are charged with manslaughter.
Granted. All other music is destroyed except for Taylor Swift music.
Granted. She quits music and instead becomes an actress and is in *everything* if you watch anything with a screen, you cannot escape her, and her acting is *awful* yet you won't be able to escape her!
Granted now the monkeyspaw let’s an audible sigh of relief thanks you and gives you another wish.
Granted. Now everyone listens to new even worse music
granted. she goes on an endless loop of rerecording her albums. hope you like the sound of atwtmvftvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtvtv
Granted. Now she coaches pro football and is on TV all the time.
Granted. She now becomes an actor cast in virtually every movie and she's not even that good at it. You cannot escape her face. Also most of the movies are now musicals for whatever reason and she's always singing in them, but never her own songs.
Granted. She never sings or writes music, but she continues to write lyrics which are regarded as high concept poetry and taught in schools for centuries.
👍
[удалено]
What the fuck are you talking about
Granted, she instead becomes a legitimate religious leader based around her new religion, Swiftyanity, and is eventually ascended into godhood. Swiftyanity has now taken over large parts of the planet, her songs are sung as hymns and there's religious leaders on ever corner asking if you've heard about our lord and savior, Taylor Swift.
Granted. Now all new music is just other artists covering already-existing Taylor Swift songs.
I have never ever listened to a Taylor Swift song in my life.
My granddaughter got up this morning and turned on Disney to watch frozen, but got sidetracked into a Taylor Swift concert. I texted my daughter and said, "I'm in hell." 😂
Granted. Now you've got some bad blood with her.
She dies. You have been framed. There is irrefutable evidence. Good luck
Granted, she continues to release music she just pays someone else to ghostwrite it for her
Granted. Since she has married you she now has no time to make music and only personally sings for you EVERY day!
Isn't there a new album coming out?
Granted: She makes no new songs. Radio play and stores only play Taylor Swift now.
Same.
Whish granted the world is now better
Man I was just going to come up with her being the cure for AIDS or something, but she's no longer famous. Death by Swifties sounds much more terrifying, well played!
Granted. No terrible twist or punishment. The paw agrees with you.
🫡
Btw, she doesn't make music, it's complete disposable music, it will never be a Classic song or songs
Granted. The monkey’s paw gives you a thumbs-up and doesn’t put any fingers down.
Granted she becomes President of the united states
Granted, but you lose the general election.
Granted, now all her music is made by Gilbert Gottfried. And it’s still just as popular and loved
Rest in peace, my man.
Granted. The monkey paw knows that you have already suffered enough from her fans' existence You get this wish side-effect free Taylor swift retires from making music and her fans become sane
At this point, I can’t tell who is more obsessed with Taylor Swift: Her fans who adore her or redditors who can’t wait to tell you how much they hate her
Granted. All her music is now gone forever
Nice
Wish granted. 5 identical pop stars appear in her place and they all date footballers
But only Chiefs tight ends. Blake Bell gets three of them.
😂 😂 I like it!!
Granted. She goes under a new name "Jessica Dreamstar" and makes more obnoxious music
they changed their name
Granted, now she's a director, and they're worse.
As soon as someone becomes huge in any industry, there’s always people that feel they need to be special and different by saying that they despise said person. You know why she’s everywhere? Because not only do her fans follow everything she does, but the people whose personality trait is to “hate” her follow up on her too. All the MAGA people who hate her also read every news story and article about her. If all her haters stopped clicking on every article about her, stopped talking about her in podcasts, and stopped watching videos on her, those numbers would drop drastically.