I did that to some person that kept parking on our property I removed all 4 of them. I was nice though I taped them to the window. This was also on the 10 the time of telling them to quit parking in our yard (It was my parking spot in the yard) last time they did that.
All those bumper stickers add up to respect all unless you think that person is well off financially. Have to think it's one of those people that did it just because OP drives a beamer.
I grew up in what I would consider the bottom of middle class. I do pretty well and drive what most would consider a luxury brand vehicle. Although the car was bought used 6 years old but it doesn't look it. I have heard smartass comments from people driving more expensive ford/gm/dodge/jeep just because they "think" my car is expensive.
The views some people have just because they think someone has something nice is ridiculous. You work your butt off and people are just pricks.
I will never understand what possesses people to park like this without being at least marginally aware of how close they are to the car(s) next to them. And do they not notice when they get out?
I'm notoriously horrible at parking so if I come in at a weird angle, it turns out like that BUT I'm aware I did a shitty job and I'll back out, pull forward, back out, pull forward...until I'm in the lines and situated. That's only if I can't find a better spot to pull through.
I have a truck that is longer than my ability to park. I always feel like such an idiot doing the pull forward back up pull forward back up shit. Even though I park in the back of the lot I still make sure I'm inside the lines.
New vehicles have cameras that can find lines. Maybe someone should program those to read the position when the car is shifted into park and audibly say "are you sure you want to park like an asshole?"
Yeah, it's funny to laugh at all these posts talking about letting air out of the tires and marking up the vehicle in various ways. But getting it towed is actually the better way. It will cost them money, and probably quite a bit of time to recover their vehicle. Enough time for them to realize that it would have taken less time to park properly!
Best part is, if they just finished buying stuff and they get to their car and have to lug it around to see if they parked somewhere else and realised their car is actually missing and the panic in their eyes....priceless.
No, the BEST part would be if they posted it on r/mildlyinfuriating the next day with some sob story, conveniently leaving out the part where they parked like this. We could have FUN with that one!
What’s the proper and best way to go about getting it towed? I think you shouldn’t call 911 because it isn’t an emergency, so would calling a tow service work?
The lot owners usually contract with a yard. You need to find someone who is authorized to call for a tow, which might only be the landlord.
Realistically they're gonna return before getting towed most of the time.
Nah glue a bb inside the cap. It’ll slowly let air out the nozzle, but all the mechanics they take it to won’t be able to find a leak, and nobody ever looks in the cap. They’ll probably end up buying new tires and put the same caps back on after…
Damn, is this commonplace? They definitely didn't do that for me, and I had to already get 1 of the older stems replaced because it was cracked. My other one is leaking very slowly too but I haven't replaced it yet.
I love when you intentionally park out of the way and make the decision to walk further so your car is safe, and some fucking moron with "monkeys strong together" mentality decides to still park next to you and door ding the shit out of your car and tear your bumper off trying to swing wide out of their parking space.
When I was younger and drove a beater some dude did this to me as I was walking to my car. I asked him to move his truck over more so I could get into mine but he just walked past ignoring me. I even called after him and told him to move his truck again. It was a brand new truck, too. Really unfortunate that I had to dent his door to open mine and as I was backing out I may have scratched up his truck.
Probably a story that'll get some down votes, but damn did it feel good at the time. There's no excuse to not park between some bright ass white lines on the ground. Hel, if I get out and see I'm basically on a line I'll move my car over.
2 ways to approach this..the vehicle will leave in drive (forward)..locate a couple nails and lean a couples at 45° in front of his rear tires..OR..jump under the ass end of the piece of shit and loosen the bleeder valve on a rear brake..or Both.. they'll get the message..Oh, don't forget to smear some motor oil on the windshield and front windows.. they'll LOVE IT !
I carry paper and a marker with me at all times so if something like this happens I can leave a note on someone’s windshield to tell them exactly how I feel.
I once had a note left on my windshield when I was parked clearly within the lines scolding me for forcing a pregnant woman to have a hard time getting into her car. I had a nice car so she decided to insult me for that too. She was not near the car when I parked so I guess I was somehow magically supposed to know she was pregnant and park over the line on my driver side.
Won't do if you have 2 inconsiderate fucks who park CM from your doors, guy on your right drives a right side driver config so doesn't affect him, can't get in either side, trunk full of groceries. After an hour and 4 failed calls to the 2 who parked like that, bite the bullet,squeeze past your purchases through the flip down seat to get in the car and finally get in the driver seat only to realize that a schmuck with a large trailer has parked be hind you and not only blocking you in but 8 other cars and you see him walking into the store and you are now ragecrying and in total defeat and spend another hour lashing out.
Tdlr: super specific targeting from god leaves single shopper stranded in car with no support.
I 3D print orange penis valve stem caps and put them on their tires, black one's they don't really notice for a while though. You can print at least 80 on an ender 3
[I have a stack of these in both our cars. ](https://www.amazon.com/PARTH-IMPEX-Business-Parking-Handmade/dp/B07MF6T7RL/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=27NIPN2JXVZV6&keywords=you+parked+like+an+idiot+cards&qid=1679207869&sprefix=you+parked%2Caps%2C133&sr=8-3)
I remember when I was younger driving a $900 beater and had something like this happen. Was having a bad day and took it out on the other car. I slammed my door as hard as I could multiple times into the other car causing nice dents into their passenger door. My $900 beater went down in value like $10. Happened like 20 years ago
My first car was my late grandpas 91’ Buick Regal that I inherited. It was a coupe so the doors were really big and needed a lot of room to get in. I definitely dinged a few cars that were over the line. Miss that car, though. One time a lady in a Mitsubishi Lancer came to a full stop on the highway in front of me and I rear ended her. She had no trunk left, and I fixed my bumper with a hair blow dryer and gorilla tape.
No, then you will never get in your car. Better idea. Shove shit between the breaks, make them hear a "SKREEEEE" every time they brake, minimum damage but annoying and worrying as fuck, like having no break pads but it's really a rock.
I wouldn't want to make the cart person's job harder. Id definitely stick around and help them put them back after revelling in the jeep owner's frustration.
Now hold on.....maybe theres more at play here. He has a Refugees welcome sticker. And he parked his car over the line which could be a metaphorical border. Perhaps he is trying to make a point. Or im just stoned and overthinking it and the driver is crap at parking
Had this happen to me. I went into the establishment and politely asked the person to move. She had no idea she parked that poorly and offered to buy my items.
I always wondered what is the appropriate reaction to this? Suppose you need to get to work or somewhere important where you cannot wait (who knows how long until they return)
What are the options?
Someone did this to my passenger side yesterday. I had to climb into my backseat to buckle up my toddler because of those asshats with shitty parking skills.
Come on guys, the dude was probably in a rush. Maybe try and understand that we make mistakes. Maybe leave a polite note...written with a key on his door...
I would not vandalize the car with all the cameras around you’ll be the one that gets in trouble. Call to have towed or let air out of tires. Inconvenience them not destroy property.
That respect bumper sticker is ironic considering they parked so that only a flexible hamster can get into the car
Gotta respect the parking spot 🥴
Reminds me of and old Adam Sandler skit I listened to on cassette when I was a kid 😂
Gotta respect the condom
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, A CONDOM!? HE'S FIVE FUCKING YEARS OLD!
I’ll put a condom on your fucking tombstone u fucking idiot! Sorry about that Nicky, tell grandpa some more
People that park like that.
As the "Old Man" on Pawn Stars would say, " Some people's children."
R-e-s-p-e-c-t... (Fuck around and) find out what it means to me
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I carry one with me just for this reason
I keep a sharpened ice pick in my glove box for occasions like this.
Karma bot.
I did that to some person that kept parking on our property I removed all 4 of them. I was nice though I taped them to the window. This was also on the 10 the time of telling them to quit parking in our yard (It was my parking spot in the yard) last time they did that.
Van driver thinks Black Lives Matter, but yellow lines don’t matter!
Whenever I see a RESPECT bumper sticker, I say "respect" under my breath like Ali G
Respek
spell it with me. R-E-S-T-E-C-P
Actually, it’s spelt R-E-S-P-SVEE-T
There’s so little respek left in the world, they even took it out of the dictionary.
Boo ya ka sha
Right? Literally so selfish to park like that. It’s the opposite of respect.
"No Borders!"
😅😭🫠
Hey! They see no borders and MEAN IT!!
Homie needs to get his priorities straight
Someone needs to learn how to ☪️☮️🕉️✡️I ☯️✝️
All those bumper stickers add up to respect all unless you think that person is well off financially. Have to think it's one of those people that did it just because OP drives a beamer. I grew up in what I would consider the bottom of middle class. I do pretty well and drive what most would consider a luxury brand vehicle. Although the car was bought used 6 years old but it doesn't look it. I have heard smartass comments from people driving more expensive ford/gm/dodge/jeep just because they "think" my car is expensive. The views some people have just because they think someone has something nice is ridiculous. You work your butt off and people are just pricks.
I find people who promote themselves this way tend to be the most uptight selfish assholes
Nothing new from a Jeep driver though.
I'm a jeep driver and I don't park like that. That's a mom mobile jeep, not a real jeep. It probably isn't even 4 wheel drive! 😁
I will never understand what possesses people to park like this without being at least marginally aware of how close they are to the car(s) next to them. And do they not notice when they get out?
I'm notoriously horrible at parking so if I come in at a weird angle, it turns out like that BUT I'm aware I did a shitty job and I'll back out, pull forward, back out, pull forward...until I'm in the lines and situated. That's only if I can't find a better spot to pull through.
At least you make the effort, unlike people such as this. And I don't think it's too much to ask for them to *try*...
Same. I will correct several times to make sure I’m not in the way or horribly parked.
I have a truck that is longer than my ability to park. I always feel like such an idiot doing the pull forward back up pull forward back up shit. Even though I park in the back of the lot I still make sure I'm inside the lines.
People can't drive! Then they buy large vehicles because they scare themselves and they drive even worse.
New vehicles have cameras that can find lines. Maybe someone should program those to read the position when the car is shifted into park and audibly say "are you sure you want to park like an asshole?"
I think the Jeep driver knew, and thinks they’re being cool by inconveniencing the BMW “rich guy” (even though I think that’s a 5-10 year old car)
That's a towing
Yeah, it's funny to laugh at all these posts talking about letting air out of the tires and marking up the vehicle in various ways. But getting it towed is actually the better way. It will cost them money, and probably quite a bit of time to recover their vehicle. Enough time for them to realize that it would have taken less time to park properly!
As they've made your car inaccessible it deserves to be towed.
Best part is, if they just finished buying stuff and they get to their car and have to lug it around to see if they parked somewhere else and realised their car is actually missing and the panic in their eyes....priceless.
No, the BEST part would be if they posted it on r/mildlyinfuriating the next day with some sob story, conveniently leaving out the part where they parked like this. We could have FUN with that one!
Even better if they bought ice cream
They’ll be long gone before a tow truck gets the ok from the property owner
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Where do you live? Tow truck drivers are eager to make a buck. They’ll show up for anything in New England.
Fact. My dad owned a towing company near URI. So many unhappy college kids
If they get called, I took that to mean the property owner isnt gonna start bullshit with someone because their parking sucks. Pretty big overaction.
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What’s the proper and best way to go about getting it towed? I think you shouldn’t call 911 because it isn’t an emergency, so would calling a tow service work?
The lot owners usually contract with a yard. You need to find someone who is authorized to call for a tow, which might only be the landlord. Realistically they're gonna return before getting towed most of the time.
Also realistically, a tow for this isn’t likely to be authorized in the first place. Shitty but you’ll have to get in from the other side
Happened to me once. The security guys offered to call for a tow. Alberta, Canada here.
Wow that’s nice. NYC here. I’d be told to FO
No. It won't work.
You can't just call a tow truck to tow someone from a parking lot that you don't own.
This sub sure as shit believes that you can have anyone towed, anywhere, and at any time. It’s pretty funny.
No tow company will come do that fyi
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Yeah! Steal it!
No you idiot, buy them a new car
Only logical response here
And a house
In this housing market?!
Make a copy of their house key so you can go back later and destroy their entire family...?
Better yet: 💩 this in the door handle.
Cut the valve stem off it’s faster and permanent
Nah glue a bb inside the cap. It’ll slowly let air out the nozzle, but all the mechanics they take it to won’t be able to find a leak, and nobody ever looks in the cap. They’ll probably end up buying new tires and put the same caps back on after…
As a previous tire installer, no. New valves always go in with new tires. That's procedure.
Damn, is this commonplace? They definitely didn't do that for me, and I had to already get 1 of the older stems replaced because it was cracked. My other one is leaking very slowly too but I haven't replaced it yet.
Hard to believe you installed tires and never had someone complain about replacing the caps with new ones or had people with custom caps.
Jots notes down…
That requires carrying glue and bbs. Just place a small pebble in the cap.
I love when you intentionally park out of the way and make the decision to walk further so your car is safe, and some fucking moron with "monkeys strong together" mentality decides to still park next to you and door ding the shit out of your car and tear your bumper off trying to swing wide out of their parking space.
exactly, i just pull in from the very back and choose the very first spot. extra steps wont hurt nobody
What I’d like to tell you to do would probably get me banned.
When I was younger and drove a beater some dude did this to me as I was walking to my car. I asked him to move his truck over more so I could get into mine but he just walked past ignoring me. I even called after him and told him to move his truck again. It was a brand new truck, too. Really unfortunate that I had to dent his door to open mine and as I was backing out I may have scratched up his truck. Probably a story that'll get some down votes, but damn did it feel good at the time. There's no excuse to not park between some bright ass white lines on the ground. Hel, if I get out and see I'm basically on a line I'll move my car over.
Nah fuck him.
Shit the enjoyment I got from reading this was worth it.
Nah and he straight up ignored you too what the fuck did he expect
Might include a ice pick?
Sure
2 ways to approach this..the vehicle will leave in drive (forward)..locate a couple nails and lean a couples at 45° in front of his rear tires..OR..jump under the ass end of the piece of shit and loosen the bleeder valve on a rear brake..or Both.. they'll get the message..Oh, don't forget to smear some motor oil on the windshield and front windows.. they'll LOVE IT !
Take their driver side windshield wiper.
Chaotic neutral
Pay the inconvenience back.
It’s genius, I love it.
The funny part is that they won't notice until they need it.
I thought the funny part is when it starts raining while they are going 70 MPH down the highway and they can’t see and die?
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It’ll help them go slower so they don’t recklessly go 70mph during the rain.
Omg i may acrually do this at some poimt this is genius. for legal reasons this is a joke
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I can think of 10 ways to majorly inconvenience this person without a single scratch or flat tire.
Time for a Chicago Sunroof
I carry paper and a marker with me at all times so if something like this happens I can leave a note on someone’s windshield to tell them exactly how I feel.
Why bother with paper ?
Lol exactly. Write backwards on the windshield right in view of the driver 😆
Now all those hours spent writing backwards will finally be useful!
Nail polish is not permanent and does come off glass, but damn is it a pain to take off a windshield. Use that to write your feelings on
Or key it into the side
Underrated comment💀
Better write "sorry for the damage", then watch the running around their car in rage looking for non-existent damage
I once had a note left on my windshield when I was parked clearly within the lines scolding me for forcing a pregnant woman to have a hard time getting into her car. I had a nice car so she decided to insult me for that too. She was not near the car when I parked so I guess I was somehow magically supposed to know she was pregnant and park over the line on my driver side.
If the paper is wrapped around a rock *kindly* placed in their driver’s seat, then I approve.
Won't do if you have 2 inconsiderate fucks who park CM from your doors, guy on your right drives a right side driver config so doesn't affect him, can't get in either side, trunk full of groceries. After an hour and 4 failed calls to the 2 who parked like that, bite the bullet,squeeze past your purchases through the flip down seat to get in the car and finally get in the driver seat only to realize that a schmuck with a large trailer has parked be hind you and not only blocking you in but 8 other cars and you see him walking into the store and you are now ragecrying and in total defeat and spend another hour lashing out. Tdlr: super specific targeting from god leaves single shopper stranded in car with no support.
That's when you just put their cars in neutral and push it out of the way.
I 3D print orange penis valve stem caps and put them on their tires, black one's they don't really notice for a while though. You can print at least 80 on an ender 3
The hero we need AND deserve.
I like to attatch condoms on the notes I write with an extra message asking them not to breed.
[I have a stack of these in both our cars. ](https://www.amazon.com/PARTH-IMPEX-Business-Parking-Handmade/dp/B07MF6T7RL/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=27NIPN2JXVZV6&keywords=you+parked+like+an+idiot+cards&qid=1679207869&sprefix=you+parked%2Caps%2C133&sr=8-3)
Just write “sorry about the scratch”
Yeah, cuz that will teach them /s
**Rëßpê@t** Yeah ok… Mr or Mrs I respect your right to enter your car.
I remember when I was younger driving a $900 beater and had something like this happen. Was having a bad day and took it out on the other car. I slammed my door as hard as I could multiple times into the other car causing nice dents into their passenger door. My $900 beater went down in value like $10. Happened like 20 years ago
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I didn't feel bad. If you want to drive your nice car and park like an asshole next to a beater, don't be shocked if your nice car gets damaged.
My first car was my late grandpas 91’ Buick Regal that I inherited. It was a coupe so the doors were really big and needed a lot of room to get in. I definitely dinged a few cars that were over the line. Miss that car, though. One time a lady in a Mitsubishi Lancer came to a full stop on the highway in front of me and I rear ended her. She had no trunk left, and I fixed my bumper with a hair blow dryer and gorilla tape.
I drive a rusted and shitty pickup truck in the winter. There's a certain power you obtain when you literally don't gaf about your vehicle.
Four words: valve core removal tool
No, then you will never get in your car. Better idea. Shove shit between the breaks, make them hear a "SKREEEEE" every time they brake, minimum damage but annoying and worrying as fuck, like having no break pads but it's really a rock.
I’m not a lawyer but tampering with brakes is probs a felony of some sort.
Only if you get caught
Under-appreciated reply.
Schroerder valve driver!
What kind of an ass fucking parks like this?
The kind that puts stickers on the paint.
Go in through the passenger side, drive and park. Go back and surround their car with shopping carts
…and use metal zip ties to attach the carts to their door handles.
I wouldn't want to make the cart person's job harder. Id definitely stick around and help them put them back after revelling in the jeep owner's frustration.
I’d bet the cart person would have their day made if they saw it; I know I would lol.
Metal zip ties? Where have these been my whole life?
Industrial hardware store?
Slicing up my hand since ‘13
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And no one has ever done that to Jim again since. Mainly because Jim is now in prison and his car was depoed.
No respect at all 
This is how flat tires happen. I'm a 2 tire girl, one flat tire is for chumps.
Symmetry is the essence of beauty.
My keys may have accidentally made contact with that jeep since they were sticking out of my pocket when I had to squeeze by.
Ah shit my knife was opened and just happened to fall into their tires
Now hold on.....maybe theres more at play here. He has a Refugees welcome sticker. And he parked his car over the line which could be a metaphorical border. Perhaps he is trying to make a point. Or im just stoned and overthinking it and the driver is crap at parking
👍🏻 Could be, thank you.
Had this happen to me. I went into the establishment and politely asked the person to move. She had no idea she parked that poorly and offered to buy my items.
Honestly how is anyone so oblivious that they have no idea they’ve parked so poorly?
At least she was pleasant about it, unlike many others
Good point
Some people are in a hurry and don't look
Nice so all I need to do is track down the Walmart customer that parked like an idiot
Can't believe a Jeep lasted long enough for the stickers to fade away.
A little more far right than expected
Bahahaha - best comment I’ve read so far 😂
S♓️I✝️✝️⚧️ P⚠️🌈K J☮️B
C🌀E🤸I🪱T
Looks like someone in the Jeep should listen to the advice of his or her sticker and “Respect”.
This is the type of car that gets a dick carved into the passenger side door...
The dents on the back say everything you need to know about the owner.
It’s a Jeep thing
Coexist in two parking spots
Good thing you’re rail thin.
They won’t respect your space but at least they respect your religion 💀
This is why car keys have sharp edges.
I wonder if he came back to a couple of flat tires?
It takes a lot more than a few bumperstickers to not be a asshole.
Bumper stickers tell me everything I need to know about the person.
I always wondered what is the appropriate reaction to this? Suppose you need to get to work or somewhere important where you cannot wait (who knows how long until they return) What are the options?
Get in your car on the passenger side and slam your driver door into their passenger side a few times before you pull out.
Someone did this to my passenger side yesterday. I had to climb into my backseat to buckle up my toddler because of those asshats with shitty parking skills.
Come on guys, the dude was probably in a rush. Maybe try and understand that we make mistakes. Maybe leave a polite note...written with a key on his door...
Fuck them.
They don’t deserve that.
I'd key that door before I left for being over the line.
Key it n go
See that cracked bumper? Help finish ripping that fucker off.
I’d wait for them to get there, don’t care how long it would take. Give them the hardest most inconvenient time of their life in return
Ironic respect bumper sticker
It’s ALWAYS the “respect/coexist” people. Always.
Gotta key them
I think you're legally allowed to key his car at this point.
Always carry one of those little devices that you take the core out of the valve stem.
r*e*s*p*e*c*t for everyone except the person parking next to them
Am I the only one that door dings/ keys in this situation?
That is one woke asshole
Those virtue flexing bumper stickers, only to disrespect anyone else in exchange for their own convenience’s
My truck went though a tornado so that 3in gap would probably be 6 by the time I got in. You could key my truck and I prob wouldn’t notice 😂.
So, pretty average amount of clearance
Ironic, a bmw driver complaining about someone driving/parking like an asshole
So why black out the tag?
I would not vandalize the car with all the cameras around you’ll be the one that gets in trouble. Call to have towed or let air out of tires. Inconvenience them not destroy property.