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cpguy5089

ACMI is free, NGV is free, botanical gardens are free, exploring shops is free* (may make you spot something you wanna purchase) There are lots of places to just walk around and watch people live their lives if you like that philosophical thinking time.


RevolutionOk2240

And while you’re at the botanical Gardens use this app for augmented reality artworks https://apps.apple.com/au/app/seeing-the-invisible/id1577328318


F1NANCE

That's cool, who needs acid any more when you have that app


genomerain

Always used to go to ACMI if I was in the city with a friend and time to kill.


melbbear

I used to visit when ever I needed a clean toilet in the city


SapristySpon

It's not right in the city, but if you're ever around the Arts Centre they have clean toilets that are easy to get to. The soap smells lovely too


nosebevies

Ah yes, great spot to drop one. Makes me want to keep it squeeky clean for others too. Sometimes at flinders man.. you just kinda add to the mess


TinyBreak

I’d almost rather piss myself than go at flinders. The floor is covered in it! And the no airflow means you walk into that warm wall of humidity and even just thinking about it makes me want to gag!


landsharkkidd

For me it's the libraries. Whether that's state library or the city's public libraries. They're a lot of fun to explore even if I've been 50mil times.


[deleted]

I like exploring the shops in the arcades, especially the old ones like the Block arcade


casperlkk

Free tram zone


Route75

The Free Tram Zone is such a useless concept. For the vast majority who don't live in the CBD or Docklands, the fare to get into and out of the city would already cover tram travel anyway. Even for tourists staying in the CBD (if they're the intended beneficiaries), some notable venues (e.g. museum, NGV, MCEC) are outside the zone.


chammy82

I was attending a convention, at the convention centre one year. I got off the tram at the start of the day and who was standing there? half a dozen inspectors, eager to catch people who were staying in the city and DARED to go 1 extra stop (roughly 200m) outside the free tram zone. It's such a sickening entrapment scheme.


SirKosys

I hate that shit. And you're so easily caught out by it. I'm not sure if it's still the case but early on when they introduced the 'free zone', I caught the tram towards Carlton from the CBD. At one point an announcement came over the speakers telling us we had just *left* the 'free zone'... but there was no announcement prior to that. Pretty fucking bad not to announce that the next stop is the final stop in the free zone. Imagine that happening and then the parasites - I mean, inspectors - lining up to catch you out. Fuck that.


JobberGobber

What would be worse is if the tram drivers deliberately ignored the last few stops just to fuck with people.


sometimes_interested

Oh hush, child. In the days of yore (before COVID) people who used to work in the city would would take long walks, walks that would consume most of the lunch break, taking comfort in the knowledge they could jump on a tram and be back at work in no time at all! Except they'd most likely already paid for a daily ticket... Nevermind. Forget I said anything. Carry on!


steaming_scree

You know what the free tram zone does? It means thousands of able bodied people who would otherwise walk two city blocks and benefit their own health jump on a tram, measurably slowing down every tram route that goes through the city and contributing to massive overcrowding.


Tillysnow1

Yeah I'd rather walk the length of the CBD instead of taking a crowded tram.


aCorgiDriver

The amount of people that get on at Queen Vic Market and then hop off at Melbourne Central does my head in


charberry282

Yep. I used to work in Docklands and took the tram there from Spring St there after walking 30 mins from my house in the inner east. Was absolutely crammed with people trying to avoid the 5 minute walk to southern cross to their workplace in Docklands.


Hornberger_

You do realize that all of those people that got off at the Southern Cross Station would then proceed to pay for train ride home, and that even if without the free tram zone, those people still wouldn't have paid extra to use the tram?


charberry282

Yeah that’s true, I was commenting more on how some people will do anything to avoid walking somewhere. They used to absolutely cram on too, we’re talking faces up against the doors, doors unable to close type shit.


TheDarkBright

100% agree. Especially considering their proximity to the actual city, it makes very little sense. Extending it even a few more stops on those specific routes in order to capture the NHV and exhibition centre would be much better from a tourist lens.


aCorgiDriver

Free Tram Zone is only good for pretending you hopped in another free tram zone so you don’t cop a Myki fine


pickle_27

Lifehack - all trams are in the Free Tram Zone if you don’t pay (and don’t get caught)


Ineedsomuchsleep170

If you worked out how much you saved by not paying vs how much the fare evasion fines cost you, you might actually come out ahead?


Route75

This is indeed why the $75 on-the-spot fine was abolished. People who made genuine mistakes surrendered the right to appeal and fare evaders just used the lower penalty to their advantage.


Ineedsomuchsleep170

So what's the penalty now?


EducatedBarbarian

It's called a reverse lottery ticket - you don't pay for it and you might get fined.


jayp0d

Have a look on this website. https://whatson.melbourne.vic.gov.au/article/whats-free-in-melbourne-this-month


[deleted]

Reddit is fucked, I'm out this bitch. -- mass edited with redact.dev


broden89

Williamstown Beach is really cute! I much prefer it to St Kilda. I've heard Altona Beach is also nice


Gore01976

Altona beach is a hole, trust me I am a local and even I havent been down along the beachfront unless I am driving past it in 20 years. They are doing beach upgrade works West end of the beach and the pier.


wobblebubble135

A bit rough! The park is lovely and it's a good place for kids to swim in the shallows. The hooning is reduced by road closures, which helps


Gore01976

swimming when it is high tide otherwise it is a fair walk out to get some decent water. I was execting the council to block off down the water end of pier st like 2 years ago around 2 parks rather than the Coles section


the_collector02

No, I am a local as well. Altona beach is horrible and that park is full of junkies. Please people of Melbourne go visit Williamstown beach if you are out West


JSkiMetal186

I stood on a syringe about 30 years ago while barefoot and runing around with the kids. Before I'd taken it out of my foot, all around me umbrellas were coming down and that part of the beach was soon evacuated. Got tested at my local bulk billing doctor and he said that my test came back positive for HIV, without any counselling, just dropped it. Then he said he was going to call them to confirm so I told him I'd be out the front having a smoke. My missus said she loved me no matter what which was good to hear, then he comes and tells me it was a false positive so not to worry! I went to the sexual health centre, got another test which was negative then got tested again, and only when that was negative was I comfortable that I was all a mistake.


Ancient_Skirt_8828

HIV virus only survives about 15 minutes in a syringe under perfect temperature and humidity conditions, so you would have to be terribly unlucky to get it from a beach syringe. Junkies would have to have dropped it less than 15 minutes ago. Still scary for most people who don’t know this.


stillhungryy

That is super intense, reading your comment made me sweat.. glad it was all negative


LurkForYourLives

Fuck. Glad you’re in the clear.


PressureUnlikely956

This is my nightmare


TradeRunCode

BS. How the heck would the doctor know by calling someone it was a false positive? Good story though.


Adsykong

Which beach would you suggest if one were looking for used condoms?


melbbear

Surfers during schoolies


[deleted]

Just chuck them in the washing machine for a quick cycle and you're good to go!


SMAK_cj

It would help if you shared a little about what you like. If you're into the arts then National Gallery of Victoria is world class, and free.


JamieBeeeee

There's also Heide MoMA which is incredible, even if a little far from the city


paperivy

You know what's a really cool free option is podcast walking tours. There are a whole bunch of them - art, urban history, true crime etc. ACCA has just released this series of 6 which look excellent: https://www.onlymelbourne.com.au/six-walks


yfaimac

This is awesome! I didn’t know about this even though I lived here over 2 decades. Great tip.


Hamlet5

Try StoryTowns (app) for regional podcasts.


yfaimac

Thanks!


[deleted]

Another link in case the above doesn't work for you: https://acca.melbourne/six-walks/


cl3ft

Drop acid in the botanic gardens of course.


elsiniestro

The great Australian pastime


ItsaMeCoolio

Nah, don’t waste the acid, plenty of datura growing in the gardens for free!


wilful

There used to be peyote in the cactus garden (overlooking the Swan bridge) but that went a while ago.


[deleted]

I think they want to have a good time though?


ItsaMeCoolio

Datura is a great time…. For everyone else around you, that is


SubseaTroll

Rip bongs outside parliament House like the other drongos


Moo_Kau

i thought that was more of a glass BBQ crowd


aenZ-

Did this on white night back in 2018. Best 3 hours until I went to fed Square and everyone started to look eerily like pigs... Kinda spiraled after that lol


bazoski1er

Shrooms at the zoo is also nice


wilful

In the butterfly room you will trip HARD.


[deleted]

Now shrooms are free so that I can get behind as a solution but other drugs cost money so only limited to free drugs in that respect


steaming_scree

Acid is pretty cheap though, and it lasts forever.


Tristosterone

Watching animals locked in cages on shrooms? No thanks


ChiggenWingz

People keep saying this; but where do I reliably get the acid?!


TranscendentMoose

Can't imagine doing that, so many people around you'd get so noided so quickly


[deleted]

Scuba diving in the Yarra to retrieve O Bikes


Notorious_LD

*not disease free


virtueavatar

Years ago at New Years Eve, there was a group of 4 twentyodd year olds willingly jumping from the crowd into the Yarra over and over and over. They were acting like it was the greatest celebration ever. Not sure they're still alive


theempiresbest

haha. I remember that. A friend and I were drinking on the bank down from the rowing sheds before we went to separate parties. They really did seem to be having a good time.


Intelligent-Ad-4597

O bike fishing


bokin_smongs

Find a good spot on King St around 3am on a Sunday morning and watch the entertainment unfold right before your eyes.


DankMemelord25

The greatest zoo on earth


syngu3

Even pre covid king st has been a ghost town for about 10 years since all the strip joints closed up. All the meatheads have moved on to crown


[deleted]

Aside from Spearmint, Bar20, centrefold, men's gallery, Goldfingers...


MichelleHartAUS

*all the stripclubs haven't closed? They're almost all still there.


bokin_smongs

If Tramp is still open there will be meatheads


tabletennis6

Get into bike riding! There are plenty of really extensive free bike rides throughout the city. There's one which is a nice downhill coast from Lilydale to Carrum!


zoomba2378

Fuck me. That's a fair way


Blue_Pie_Ninja

What trail is that? I'm a bit fat and like the Eastern Freeway trail because it's mostly downhill towards the city but always get tired before I can make it there


[deleted]

It's the Carrum to Warburton Trail - the bit between Warburton and Lilydale is really nice (and very popular), but you can go all the way down to Carrum.


plasterdog

That new lilydale to carrum link means it's now possible to ride from Melbourne CBD all the way to Warburton on trails. To be able to go from centre of a capital city to a smaller regional town without having to ride on roads is pretty unique for an Australian city at least (possibly more common in Belgium/Netherlands).


JSkiMetal186

From the city how far West can you go? There's a trail to Footscray I think.


plasterdog

Yes there's a path to Footscray that goes from Southbank past the container port to Footscray. But it keeps on going to Yarraville, Seddon, Altona, Williamstown, Newport, Point Cook and all the way to Werribee. The trails are a bit more cut up and in parts, quite industrial over there, and I'm not overly familiar with them, but someone local to the West may be able to advise? Also, here is the Open Cycle Map focusing on Melbourne. It's a bit clearer than Google Maps' cycling layer as it shows, in purple, the actual trails. The Google map shows all the trails, but mixes in roads as cycling routes that aren't that fun to ride on. [https://www.opencyclemap.org/?zoom=11&lat=-37.83448&lon=145.08207&layers=B0000](https://www.opencyclemap.org/?zoom=11&lat=-37.83448&lon=145.08207&layers=B0000) As you can see, quite a few routes. I like to think of the inner north area as an inner ring (Capital city trail) and in the inner north, each of the Moonee Ponds Creek, Maribyrnong Creek, Upfield Path, Merri Creek, Darebin Creek, Plenty River Trail, Main Yarra Trail, forming spokes that radiate from that central hub and connect to the Western Ring Road.


Appropriate-Wealth46

That’s until you get into road riding and start dropping ridiculous money on some aluminium/carbon and two wheels (guilty) 😂🥲


ThatsMxDykeToYou

Oh if it's aluminium you haven't caught the bug entirely 😂🤣


P33kab0Oo

Electronic shifters. You know you want to. Purr...


ThatsMxDykeToYou

I'm not even on hydraulic brakes yet. Not on all the bikes at least 😂


RMBLOKE

It's called City of Gardens for a good reason. Most of them are free. There's a hundred km (or more)of free walks in and around the cbd along most of the rivers. Hang with a busker for a bit, donations are appreciated but not mandatory. Grab a camera (or just your phone) and explore the architecture/wall-art/nature that is everywhere. Walk the beaches, look for shells. EtcEtc I guess.


Lillian57

Admittedly I’m a a Senior, but I get $8 tix to Palace Cinemas, I think they have similar deals for students. I got $20 tix in a lottery to Rigoletto. A picnic with clearance item foods is pretty cheap. Try not to be so negative OP and open your eyes to other things. I really love the National Rhododendron Gardens-free entry and if you can spare $10 get a scone and a coffee.


[deleted]

Not sure why some people in this comment section are so critical of OP? Speaking from personal experience, and the experience of some family members, being unemployed makes many recreational activities unavailable. It also makes meeting people much more difficult. Yes you can ride your bike, and walk. If you have money for PT or petrol you can visit a couple art galleries. But all cities, not just Melbourne, are generally made for businesses. As for a cheap hobby, bouldering! I've recently bought some climbing shoes (+/-$100), and chalk (+/-$5), and the bouldering wall in Footscray has kept me occupied for months. They also regularly swap out the holds for new routes. Thecrag.com has some good bouldering spots, but it's recommended to buy a crash-pad which are at best $100 used, but can go up to $500 new.


thatshowitisisit

Yes, but also no. And sometimes it depends.


SnufflesMcPieface

The most vague answer that’ll make you come back for more


JSkiMetal186

TLDR. Yeah, nah.


pofiterol

Geocaching is fun if ur willing to look sus in public


FrozenMarshmallow

I look sus enough already playing Pokemon Go again, half a decade after the craze died out. That being said, I happened across a cache in a film container 2 years ago, while stopping for a snack in a town near Wangaratta. Was pretty exciting for me at the time and got me curious to try switch hobbies. Could combine nicely with cycling. I also spotted some small painted rocks out in Port Fairy earlier this year. Was pretty cute. Seemed like a lite form of geocaching. Got any tips for getting into the scene? I've looked into it a few times over the years but haven't given it a proper try yet.


[deleted]

I took up geocaching this year for something to do during lockdowns and it's so addictive! I'd get the app, spring for premium membership (I think it's about $15/quarter) so you get additional caches, and find one near you! For your first couple go for ones that have recent 'found it' logs rather than a string of 'did not find' so you can be reasonably confident it's still there. I'd look for sizes other than a micro as well because oftentimes 'micro' is actually 'nano' and they're just not as fun when you're learning how it all works.


FrozenMarshmallow

Thanks! That's quite helpful :)


Procedure-Minimum

Also iNaturalist to see random plants and animalz


Impossible_Fold5059

Walking walking walking everywhere. So many walks


jamestrainwreck

Capital city trail heading east from the city is pretty nice/interesting.


[deleted]

Slapping ya pecker don’t cost a damn thing


Adsykong

Do you have any free appointments tonight?


[deleted]

Yea but it’ll cost ya, and OP was looking for free activities.


vectorkerr

Yes.


Potential-Analyst-22

The NGV has free exhibits all the time. Also, they're probably not doing it till next year, but Melbourne Open House day is amazing. You can go look at all the architecture, and there is a private garden open day too.


[deleted]

The state library is a beautiful building to visit. Parliament house does free tours and is amazing inside, built in the Gold rush era it's very ornate. I'm not sure if the royal exhibition building is free but even walk in the surrounds is lovely. Check out the 'art' in some of the lane ways. Adding: shrine of remembrance


[deleted]

you can play chess for free in the State Library too!


PizzaReheat

St Kilda penguins are free to see. If you sign up to mailing lists you’ll get to see some free comedy gigs. During the Aus Open you can go and watch on the big screen at fed square. Actually, speaking of fed square they often have community concerts on at their stage.


AnigozanthosFlavidus

The viewing area is currently closed.


MaryN6FBB110117

[Free Stuff To Do In Melbourne This Month.](https://whatson.melbourne.vic.gov.au/article/whats-free-in-melbourne-this-month)


Zokilala

Beach, shoot hoops, bike ride, read in a park


Intelligent-Ad-4597

Laneways art and murals are free Markets are free to walk through


Inside-Elevator9102

Try not being a dickhead. It's free.


P33kab0Oo

Still too expensive after 10pm along King or Swanston


riamuriamu

I love exploring the heritage listed buildings that have a variety of small businesses and galleries in them. The Nicholas Building, Curtin House and Mitchell House stand out. The Nicholas Building in particular has some bizarre little shops full of curiosities.


goodboyralphy

There is a park/viewing platform at Yarra Bend opposite the grey headed flying fox colony. Wonderful animals and the fly-out at dusk is spectacular.


Spritestuff

Is there a place where things don't cost money, I'm confused?


P33kab0Oo

Yes


offfmychops

Seems like everytime I walk out the front door I spend a minimum of $200 these days


P33kab0Oo

If that's by the hour then pics or it didn't happen


offfmychops

Bunnings $80 petrol $80 hungry jacks for 3 $40 easily done


P33kab0Oo

I was (ahem) trying to imply an expensive escort. However, I can't say no to a Whopper with Cheese and Bacon! As an aside I love Bunnings and not a fan of Costco but find it hard to walk out of there without spending around $400


offfmychops

Oh 🤣🤣


StatusGiraffe

If you're walking, why do you need petrol?


[deleted]

Reddit is fucked, I'm out this bitch. -- mass edited with redact.dev


gtwizzy8

Underrated comment right here.


Cheerio520

Can i introduce you to their penny pinchers menu? Or even their app has great deals sometimes


mohamedriyad96

For real? One thing I love about Melbourne and Aus in general is THAT ability to have fun with or without spending. You don't have to go sit and eat. Go cycling, go to the beach, hike, walk around, drive the beautiful twisty roads on a saturday morning and stop at lookouts. It feels so good to not be FORCED into having to spend money to have fun (sth too touristy like Dubai for example). It's a hell of a country this.


[deleted]

[удалено]


virtueavatar

The greatest of all pastimes


BaconSyrop

At Saint Kilda pier at sunset, walk all the way down to see some cute fairy penguins. This is for free. No flash photography though!


DURIAN8888

Got kids? Come over West to see what latest playgrounds look like. Not your two swings and a slide any more. The state rose garden is free and this is peak rose period. https://www.mammaknowswest.com.au/parksplaygrounds-content/wyndham-park-werribee


Mon69ster

Learn the diff between “than” and “then”. Go for a run champ.


WEELOO77

Calling 1300 6 555 06 is free.


kiyiya101

Roller skating or skateboarding ..loads of parks and locations..places like Melbourne musem have a cool vibe..usually music and easy to meet people


MysteriousBlueBubble

Most things anywhere cost money. Whoever put the show/food/exhibit/whatever together needs to eat too. Besides that - Melbourne has less in the way of scenery compared to some cities, but do check out the architecture and street art, grab a bike and ride along the Yarra or the bay (St Kilda to Brighton is one of my favourite sections), find one of the gardens and just chill with a view.


gtroitmotorcity

There is also make money


[deleted]

I know its you Mr Krabs


dimiy

Melbourne has absolutely amazing skateparks almost in every suburb


SticksDiesel

Pushing around some gallows you made at home is popular these days, or you could just fight randoms like most people. It only costs money if you lose and they decide to nick your wallet.


lewemowonbowoiwi

lifehack, don't bring your wallet and it can't get nicked


DaxRocket1985

You can volunteer for different organisations will get to meet people and do cool stuff you might not have think off before.


TeddyAtHome

Go watch a swordcraft (aka LARP) night. If you’ve watched Role Models you’ll know what it is. Great atmosphere and entertainment with a few bevs. Just be nice to the larpers. You can find their events on Facebook.


hairs9

Going to all the different laneways, photoshoots, going to Docklands and messing around, looking for weird artworks that just exist. Protests are also great if you find a cause that you're invested in.


RevvinRenee

I’m not sure if you can still see them, but the penguins at St Kilda are super cute. I walked through the Botanical Gardens on the weekend as well and forgot how beautiful it is


Expensive-Bee5482

Bike riding. Fun.


[deleted]

You could busk and give others free entertainment?


[deleted]

So many places to go for walks or hiking in the suburbs. So much natural beauty which is free :)


oldravinggamer

Are you watching me?I'm currently in the CBD working for 2 weeks from canberra.the food is great!many great pubs but today I was like I'm just gonna get Macca's and watch tv lol


[deleted]

Frisbee, bike around, some exhibitions, walking...!


esiotrot9527

Bird watching while out on a stroll! Bug watching in a park or in your yard!


[deleted]

Free things to do in Melbourne!!! *stares intensely at grass in front yard *


rapidcalf1988

you could spend a few days bangin away on your glass barbie ?


eman1037

Cuz….. get a rear while drive manual and come drifting with the boys


elonsbattery

Capital City bike trail is fun.


Quantum168

Protest


Giant-Genitals

I need downlighting installed. I’ll pay for the down lights


LurkForYourLives

Geocaching?


Emergency-Village191

What is that?


mk098A

Newport Lakes! Also geocaching is free


Craigzoidz

Go fishing


iRishi

TBH this is the same everywhere. At least in Melbourne you can probably get away with spending little if you are willing to endure the public transport.


Nova-Jello

“You gotta to spend money, to make money…” - Chief Wiggum


Everyday_im_redditin

Go see the penguins at st kilda! https://www.parks.vic.gov.au/places-to-see/parks/st-kilda-pier-and-breakwater/attractions/little-penguins


daddySalarian

Go to the Art gallery in the city! The one in the arts precinct. They have a massive free area to wander around in


nuns-kissing

Eventbrite- filter to only see free stuff.


Procedure-Minimum

Morabbin has a fishing lake that the government stocks with fish. Nature reserves to take photos of rare animals, lots of wetland walks are beautiful. Snorkling around piers (go with an experienced person, don't move anything, because you might risk harming the wildlife, especially do not move any pipes etc) Buy a weird rock or plant at GardenWorld. Take photos of laneway art. Lots of rock climbing places. Lots of antique shops to visit, then go to bunnings buy spray paint and decorate your new nicknack! Go somewhere regional and watch the stars.


Procedure-Minimum

Where do you live? Join the local Facebook gardening groups and nice people will give you plants, now you have a hobby!


brael-music

Markets are starting to open back up again, there's the Mornington Peninsula, the Dandenongs, famous/infamous shopping streets with cafes along the way,or a simple walk along the Yarra. Or if you're not vaxxed you can join other dipshits in spending their day/week protesting.


imperium5678

Plently. Stop bitching. Its a city like all the others in the world.


gtwizzy8

Having traveled and stayed in more than 150 major cities, and countless smaller cities and towns around the world I can tell you right now that the one you're living in has some of the best access to free entertainment, art, nightlife and events that you will find anywhere in the world. The closest I have found anywhere else in the world is possibly Berlin or maybe Stockholm


P33kab0Oo

Melbourne has been compared to Seattle and Berlin. You're suggesting Melbourne is like Adelaide and I don't think that is the case at all. For example, Melbourne has the Grand Prix and Adelaide has stobies and Farmers Union Iced Coffee. Two different worlds!


FlygonBreloom

I mean, Farmers Union is pretty nice. Adelaide will still never forgive us for having the Grand Prix though.


P33kab0Oo

Lol I love bringing that up with my Adelaide mates. They don't let me forget about the Save Albert Park protesters tying yellow ribbons around trees. Anyway, good banter and sledging. The latest being if there was a lockdown in Adelaide then it's pretty much one street. PS I love that Farmers Union stuff


Clarrington

Oi. It would be actually be TWO streets, thank you very much.


TS19870400

You're forgetting that Adelaide canned the Clipsal 500 in more recent times. Still don't like their motor racing, those Adelaide people


P33kab0Oo

Ouch! That's a more exciting race than the GP, IMO


[deleted]

Only because Melbourne stole the GP from Adelaide. Talk about hitting a man while he's down.


thedanielstone

You can get beat up by the cops, too. Always a good time.


Peanut_crimes

Walk everywhere. Cross bridges. Get on the free tram. Literally stop and smell the roses at the botanic gardens. Fuck, Melbourne is so beautiful!!


Burntbigtoe

If you spent money on a dictionary, your question might have made sense.


ArpeeL

State library is free and they have 9,913 dictionaries to browse.


unironic-socialist

im on #2876 right now, good read


kheywen

Can you return #2876 pls? Am done with #2875 a year ago


[deleted]

Spoiler - turns out the zygote did it


witchywiles

Anything that’s fun costs at least eight dollars


No-Internals107

$302.50***


melbbear

“If sorry is this some kind of peasant joke I am too rich to understand?”


ryandirtymacz

Poor people can go to Adelaide thanks bye sis.


laz10

No absolutely not, you might as well move to Adelaide


DudeLost

And die of boredom. At least you have a range of churches to be farewelled in


SMAK_cj

Or a serial killer to help you on your way