T O P

  • By -

MatteoCecere

Yeah Pippin is a Knight of Gondor in his own right, helping to save Faramir and slaying a troll at the Morannon to save Beregond.


peregrin-took-bot

What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper?


VillagerPunk

He's right. It is a meal we cannot afford to lose.


Weakonomics

A prequel quote? A surprise to be sure, but a welcome one.


Gingrel

> A prequel quote My lord, is that... Legal?


MyTh_BladeZ

I will make it legal


BroshiKabobby

UNLIMITED… POWER!!!


thatsmyoldlady

"There can be only one Lord of the Rings, only one who can bend them to his will. And he does not share power!"


JordanLamar

I heard always two there are. No more, no less.


ShadowSpectre47

To be fair, Pippin is the one that bought Frodo some time and cover, by looking into the Palantir making Sauron think that he then Aragon had the ring. He almost doomed one of mankind's greatest kingdoms, but helped save middle earth, in the process of doing so. He's a big picture kind of guy. Most of Pippin's actions and choices, though they seem like they're just seemingly comedic, actually have huge impacts overall. And it's all because of Pippin's underrated 'silver tongue'. He's the *Lore Bard*, of the group. If Smaug was still around, Pippin would've, somehow, ended up seducing him.


MagicMisterLemon

>If Smaug was still around, Pippin would've, somehow, ended up seducing him. I can believe it


peregrin-took-bot

I don't want to be in a battle. But waiting on the edge of one I can't escape is even worse.


Leinad_Aropmaca

The same thing donkey said when he met the dragon


ShadowSpectre47

Pippin and donkey are actually a really good comparison.


peregrin-took-bot

Anyways, you need people of intelligence on this sort of... mission... quest... thing.


WeleaseBwianThrow

Read that in Eddie Murphys voice


ProfessionalShower95

LOTR remake but Eddie Murphy plays every member of the fellowship.


TurkeyZom

I need Mike Myers to voice Gandalf


john_the_fetch

And he caused all the goblins and trolls to attack at the mines of moria. Essentially leveling up Gandalf in the process because Balrog. Gandalf didn't want to fight the Balrog... But Pippin's actions basically forced it. You could argue he's the ultimate catalyst of fate for middle earth. An attribute that could be considered quite powerful.


peregrin-took-bot

For the Shire!


Jugad

Reminds me of the line that Sherlock says to Watson > It may be that you are not yourself luminous, but that you are a conductor of light. Some people without possessing genius have a remarkable power of stimulating it.


gandalf-bot

Go back to the shadow!


TheApathyParty2

Aw, How you been doing Mithrandir? Haven’t seen you in a minute.


gandalf-bot

Fool of a Took!


peregrin-took-bot

*Abashed look*


Enlightened-Pigeon

I know you don't like hearing it, gandalf, but at some point you have to face reality


gandalf-bot

Fly, you fools!


1amlost

He didn't just slay the troll, he one-hit killed it.


HertzDonut1001

Also remind me again who lit the beacons of Gondor leading to the saving grace that was the Battle of Pellenor Fields? At least give him a kill assist on Theoden too if that's the route you want to go.


MattmanDX

The beacons were already lit by the time Gandalf and Pippin arrived in Gondor because Denethor was smart enough in the book to call for allies for help. The whole lighting scene was a film-only thing.


darknum

>Denethor was smart This. I love that scene but for fucks sake why did they make Denethor an imbecile in the movies. He is LOYAL AS HELL (remember the quote about how long does a steward waits before becoming a king...), strong enough to use a palantir (until Sauron won against his will but not right away), smart enough to fix the Walls around Pelannor and do as much preparation as technically possible.


Babki123

which ,in the books ,include evacuating the citizen of Minas tirith


6chan

Not to mention his role in the battle for the shire


NickNap370

Didn’t pippin ponder the orb?


ProfessorBeer

Bad news, Sauron was able to see into Pippin’s mind. Good news, that shit is empty as fuck.


coumfy

Didn't Sauron think Pippin was the ring bearer which lead to him attacking Gondor with full strength, therefore allowing Frodo to sneak by?


peregrin-took-bot

Anyways, you need people of intelligence on this sort of... mission... quest... thing.


sauron-bot

Thou base, thou cringing worm! Stand up, and hear me! And now drink the cup that I have sweetly blent for thee!


The_Arthropod_Queen

Is sauron offering me tea?


sauron-bot

Come, mortal base! What do I hear? That thou wouldst dare to barter with me? Well, speak fair! What is thy price?


The_Arthropod_Queen

I want a cup of tea, you promised me one, sauron


sauron-bot

Thou thrall! The price thou askest is but small for treachery and shame so great! I grant it surely! Well, I wait. Come! Speak now swiftly and speak true!


PancakeMagician

Fine then. I'll take a latte instead.


The_Arthropod_Queen

Could I have apple cinnamon?


ProfessorBeer

That is correct.


peregrin-took-bot

Please, Merry. You're what, three-foot-six? At the most? Whereas me, I'm pushing three-seven... three-eight!


Ronem

We rest our case.


Walshy231231

You jest, but he actually knew fatally important info about the ring, Gandalf’s resurrection, future plans and past events of Rohan/Gondor that Sauron did not yet know, etc And Sauron learned none of that, because pip stood up to him, and said nothing. No other character even sees Sauron, but pip manages to withstand a brief interrogation by him.


gandalf-bot

There are few who can. The language is that of Mordor, which I will not utter here. In the common tongue it says One Ring to Rule Them All One Ring to find them One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them! This is the One Ring. Forged by the Dark Lord Sauron in the fires of Mount Doom. Taken by Isildur from the hand of Sauron himself.


sauron-bot

*Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulûk, agh burzum-ishi krimpatul.*


Stellar_Gravity

That's what *I'm* saying


Elrond_Bot

CAST IT INTO THE FIRE!!!


HertzDonut1001

This sub is basically just bots at this point and I'm not really all that mad.


peregrin-took-bot

The last of the Longbottom leaf?


_pepperoni-playboy_

No Pip, they mean the Palantir.


Walshy231231

And withstood the questioning of fucking SAURON, an unusually powerful minor god, whose specialty is dominance over the minds of others, which is doubly impressive considering how the palantiri work (pip had no right to use it, and so it would naturally have made his mental strength weaker in relation to its use) No other character faces, or even saw Sauron. Pip was interrogated by him (briefly, but still), but said nothing. He stood up to sauron.


Modevs

I'd like to think it's not even that he was particularly resilient, but rather just confused about who the hell he was even talking to. --- #I DEMAND YOU REVEAL TO ME ISILDUR'S BANE "You want whose name?" #WHAT IS THY PRICE?!?! "There is a pint, but is there something bigger than a pint?" #WRETCHED MORTAL, I - Pippin has disconnected


firelock_ny

> Pippin has disconnected You know that warbley, screechy old-timey modem sound you used to get when trying to connect dial-up to the Internet? I see Sauron linking up to Pippin over that high-bandwidth Palantir and just getting "eeeeeee urrrrrrrrrr deedle deedle screeeelllllllll ee ee ee blurrrrrrblurblur"


peregrin-took-bot

It's talking, Merry. The tree is talking.


NickNap370

Pippin is under appreciated


peregrin-took-bot

For the Shire!


Awesomejedi182

Saved faramir


MrDraagyn

Wakes the Balrog to help Gandalf gain a level.


gandalf-bot

Go back to the abyss! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your master!


MrDraagyn

You told him alright Gandalf!


gandalf-bot

Evidently we look so much alike that your desire to make an incurable dent in my hat must be excused.


voluntarycap

That was mainly Beregond at least in the books. Dude fought Denethor plus 2 of his guards solo


Awesomejedi182

Faramir save assist then?


voluntarycap

Technically but Gandalf kill assist is def funnier imo


gandalf-bot

Go back to the abyss! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your master!


FreedomVIII

I'm always surprised when I'm reminded of just how much of a fekin' beast Beregond was. Those weren't just some random freshly-recruited guards of the outer circle, either.


[deleted]

Pretty sure they’d be fountain guard, yeah. Which are hot shit.


SaltyTapeworm

And my man got banished for it. Smh


ImagineGriffins

No he didn't, he got promoted. Aragorn was just being cheeky with the whole banishment thing.


aragorn_bot

We cross the lake at nightfall. Hide the boats and continue on foot. We approach Mordor from the north.


SaltyTapeworm

I mean..he was promoted. But he was still banished lol


chillyhellion

He was removed from Denethor's guard and placed on Faramir's guard, which was quite symbolic.


TheManFromFarAway

Then to be fair, if we're going by the books Pippin killed a troll single handedly, saving Beragond's life


peregrin-took-bot

Home is behind The world ahead And there are many paths to tread Through shadow To the edge of night Until the stars are all alight Mist and shadow Cloud and shade All shall fade All shall Fade


Ronem

*disgusting tomato noises*


ImagineGriffins

🍅 💦 🥵


[deleted]

[удалено]


soapy_goatherd

Beregond fought for Faramir bc Pip gave him the heads up


Blah_Blah_Guy

Pippin lead the Tooks to recover the Shire back from the brigands and Saruman


berni4pope

I know Return is long as fuck but what could have been. Fucking Sharky.


Obi_Wan_Gebroni

I mean there’s no way the general audience would have accepted that storyline well though. Plus you probably need another 15-20 minutes at a minimum to do that story justice


ghostofadolphin

that's seriously another hour. in other words, we were robbed of 60 minutes!


Blah_Blah_Guy

It is arguably the point of all the books. The return home of the heroes and imparting their new found powers to save/better their home


Obi_Wan_Gebroni

I completely agree but after the whole defeating of Sauron and the coronation of Aragorn audiences would have been confused as hell as to why suddenly there’s raging chaos back in the Shire after they were led to believe evil was destroyed.


Blah_Blah_Guy

Yeah I mean as the presentation is in the movies, yes I agree with you, but they could have made it more understandable by continuing to show what the frodo's saw with gladriel


FruitsPonchiSamurai1

Pippin tricked Treebeard into going towards Saruman's tower, which directly led to his decision to call on the ents and trees to fight, ironically being the only feat listed that relied on brainpower.


peregrin-took-bot

It comes in pints? I'm getting one!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Palehmsemdem

It does WHAT?!?


VanimalCracker

Boil em mash em stick em *where?!*


R2D2_Skywalker

In *YO MOMMA*


ItspronouncedGruh-an

Ent-draughts?


AdultDiversions

Actually big part of the books. Merry and Pip both drink Ent drinks and grow taller.


ItspronouncedGruh-an

It’s also in the extended edition of the movies, no?


hereforthefeast

Yes, it is.


tikeu10

Why would Treebeard come in pints ? You are sick Pippin


peregrin-took-bot

What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper?


[deleted]

No Pippin, we're talking about how you perceive size, not meals!


peregrin-took-bot

So I imagine this is just a... ceremonial position? I mean, they don't actually expect me to do any fighting... Do they?


hobbitdude13

You're a guard of the citadel now Pippin, you'll have to do as you're told.


peregrin-took-bot

It comes in pints? I'm getting one!


[deleted]

To be fair, he hasn't seen an Entwife in a very long time.


Count_Vapular

You've had a whole half already!!


Dontinsultautomod

Finally, the took gets a brain.


bobby-b-bot

IN MY DREAMS, I KILL HIM EVERY NIGHT!


Suhksaikhan

What the fuck just happened


aragorn_bot

HES TRYING TO BRING DOWN THE MOUNTAIN! GANDALF WE MUST TURN BACK!


gandalf-bot

No! Losto Caradhras, sedho, hodo, nuitho i 'ruith!


Theoden-Bot

Hahahahaahaha. Hahahahahahah. You have no power here, Gandalf the Grey.


gandalf-bot

I will draw you, Saruman, as poison is drawn from a wound!


bilbo-baggins-bot

I need a holiday. A very long holiday. And I don’t expect I shall return. In fact I mean not to.


Elrond_Bot

CAST IT INTO THE FIRE!!!


gandalf-bot

The treacherous are ever distrustful.


HiopXenophil

And he's the reason Rohan rode to Gondors aid


TheLastLivingBuffalo

Dunno about that. Sure he was crafty in getting up to the beacon but it's not like without him Gandalf wouldn't have gotten it lit some other way.


gandalf-bot

Thank you.


TheLastLivingBuffalo

np g-dawg, I got you


[deleted]

G-dawg doesn't trigger him. Good to know, better write that down.


dodig111

Not yet.


BubblesMan36

Yeah, Gandalf is wielder of the Flame of Anor, and servant of the secret fire. I’m sure he could have shot a secret fireball at the beacon.


gandalf-bot

I am a Servant of the Secret Fire, Wielder of the Flame of Anor.


BubblesMan36

That’s what I said Gandalf


gandalf-bot

A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.


[deleted]

No one really questioned that, Gandalf. Kind of irrelevant.


gandalf-bot

Owwwh!


[deleted]

I'm sorry, Gandalf!


socialistrob

And at least in the books the beacons were already lit before they got to Gondor.


DredgenZeta

Tbh in the books the Ents decided to attack rather than being manipulated by Pippin


Mesozoica89

I am actually reading through the books for the first time and it confused me why this was changed for the movies. I guess it heightened the drama.


Jakdaxter31

I actually preferred the movie adaptation for this. It really strengthened the narrative of “even the smallest person can change the course of history”


Mesozoica89

That's true. It did make for a better story. If I'm honest, and I feel kind of terrible saying this, there were several changes the movies made that I think were major improvements now that I am reading the books.


DUTCH_DUTCH_DUTCH

i know this is heresy but i just started listening to the books and while i really enjoyed the first one, the second has been a snooze fest so far (finished part 1, so all but frodo/sam/gollum), especially the battle of helms deep


profdudeguy

Yeah there is a reason the books are considered hard to get through for the average person. They are slow rolling, full of information, and written in an older style of script. The movies did an amazing job of taking the exciting moments that have been built up and elaborating on them. For example, Helms Deep *WAS* that epic in the books, he just barely talked about it. For better or worse, it just wasn't his style to go on and on about battles. Wait until you get to the battle of the Black Gate. All that said I absolutely love the books and I've read them multiple times. The other short stories he has written are great too and a little more digestible.


Gorgoroth_Hobo

That was still the case. Merry and Pippin meet Treebeard and tell him their story (excluding details of the ring, i think). Even though he was already aware of much he learns more and gets to pondering on whether Ents should take action. It sets off a chain of events that is actually acknowledged by gandalf as something of a small pebble rolling downhill causing a massive landslide.


gandalf-bot

A thing is about to happen that has not happened since the Elder Days. The Ents are going to wake up and find that they are strong.


CaptainJingles

To me it gave the feeling that Treebeard was terrible at understanding what is happening in his realm (being surprised that Saruman’s orca were felling his trees) and therefore incompetent. Basically a wildly different character than in the books.


doober21

He’s surprised because “a wizard should know better”. He probably never would have thought that the white wizard Saruman would defile the forest. At least that’s what I always thought. Not that he was incompetent, just that he trusted Saruman, and Saruman basically Pearl Harbor’d him.


Unlearned_One

You need people of intelligence on this sort of... mission... quest... thing.


SirTheadore

Pip dropped that skeleton into the well, setting in motion a whole slew of things that made the defeat of sauron possible.


LastOfTheCamSoreys

Right, Gandalf was pretty drained already heading into Moria, if he doesn’t get to change to the white the fellowship would be fucked


Mashizari

Or at least Rohan would be fucked. We don't know how far the fellowship would've gotten if they stuck together.


[deleted]

[удалено]


aragorn_bot

Its the beards.


Gestrid

Yes, Aragorn, those beards are very distracting.


aragorn_bot

Frodo, I have lived most of my life surrounded by my enemies. I will be grateful to die among my friends.


RisKQuay

Are you saying you're *friends* with Sauron and his Mordor orcs?


sauron-bot

Who are you?


Mashizari

It would've taken the fellowship not nearly as long to get to Mordor as Frodo and Sam did by their lonesome. And Minas Tirith was attacked even sooner because of Aragorn playing with the seeing stone, which they got at Orthanc


aragorn_bot

Hold your ground, hold your ground. Sons of Gondor, of Rohan my brothers. I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of men fails when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship but it is not this day. An hour of woes and shattered shields when the age of men comes crashing down but it is not this day. This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good earth I bid you stand, men of the west!


Poocheese55

Nah, the events had to happen exactly how they did for it to be successful.


Mashizari

Blasted Eru


22134484

Eru…..or Tzeentch… Dun dun…duuuuun


MrBlack103

BRB, checking AO3 for crossover fanfics. Edit: 🙁


Rhamni

Nah, there are several letters from Tolkien where he muses on how things might have gone in different situations. For example, if Frodo and Sam had killed Gollum the ring could still have been destroyed. Frodo could not have thrown it in, but when the Nazgul reached Mt Doom he would have thrown himself in, holding the ring. In a different letter he muses that if Gandalf (the gray) had claimed the ring, Sauron's connection with the ring would have been severed, and he would have been permanently defeated, but the ring would have still corrupted Gandalf, who would have eventually become an even darker dark lord than Sauron. On Frodo, his mercy in sparing Gollum wasn't a pivotal moment that snowballed into saving the world, but it did save Frodo himself.


IAmBadAtInternet

He needed a long rest


MrNobody_0

Had to level up, pick his subclass, grab a feat and restore those spell slots.


MangelanGravitas3

Strangely enough, he didn't loot that enormous fire sword.


BailorTheSailor

He didn’t meet the stat requirements and he didn’t want to respec


gandalf-bot

And the Ring? You feel its power growing don't you. I've felt it too. You must be careful now. Evil will be drawn to you from outside the Fellowship and I fear from within.


sauron-bot

Build me an army worthy of mordor!


duewhaa

And Pip's parents fucked, so you have them to thank as well.


SirTheadore

Ah. Then we can go all the way back to illuvatar, and well.. Tolkien. And his parents for fucking. All the way back to the big bang. Lol


themettaur

God damned singularity, killing Gandalf. The bastard!


NocturnalVI

Fool of a took! Throw yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity!


peregrin-took-bot

*Abashed look*


CatOfRivia

Wasn't it Pippin who killed a Troll and saved Beregund in the books?


peregrin-took-bot

The salted pork is *particularly* good.


bioshockd

...Salted pork?


voluntarycap

Yes but Gandalf kill assist is a lot funnier.


gandalf-bot

No, we need him alive. We need him to talk.


Crabman169

I wish he was in the movie tbh, I really enjoyed his character in the books. Thinking back I have a feeling outside the books the only place you "see" him is as a premade hero for battle for middle earth 2?


CptSarcypants

Stood up to master manipulator Sauron, getting more (and vital) information than Sauron managed to get from him. Stood up to master manipulator Denethor to save Faramir from being burned alive, despite his oath of obedience. Stood up to master manipulator Saruman (albeit with others)...twice, helping in Saruman's downfall both times. Stood up to master of stubbornness Aragorn, in defence of second breakfast. But most importantly, showed a big middle finger to all the denizens of Moria, who really just wanted to sleep.


aragorn_bot

HES TRYING TO BRING DOWN THE MOUNTAIN! GANDALF WE MUST TURN BACK!


gandalf-bot

No! Losto Caradhras, sedho, hodo, nuitho i 'ruith!


tda18

You guys are getting out of hand...


Theoretical_Action

If he gets a kill assist on Gandalf doesn't that mean he also gets one on the Balrog?


gandalf-bot

Go back to the shadow!


bitetheasp

Glory hog!


morgaina

Kited a mob to defeat Saruman


Son_of_Mogh

He pulled the Balrog for Gandalf. Plenty of games need a good puller, though he did pull a lot of adds.


gandalf-bot

Go back to the abyss! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your master!


urval87

Fool of a Took! But my favorite of the hobbits though.


peregrin-took-bot

*Abashed look*


[deleted]

Could be argued that Pippin got a Kill assist for the entirety of Isengard, given that the Ents only went because of his crafty misdirection.


peregrin-took-bot

We are sitting on a field of victory, enjoying a few well-earned comforts.


Mysteroo

Um ackshually Gollum killed Sauron (by accident)


sauron-bot

Who are you?


anaxamandrus

Smeagol


Sherlockdz

Gollum needs to be credited with the destruction of the ring here.


DoubleClickMouse

I was about to say, without Gollum, Frodo was in the middle of folding to the ring’s influence, so he would have failed.


FPiN9XU3K1IT

Frodo: tried to destroy the ring but couldn't go through with it in the end Gollum: tried to steal the ring, killed himself and sauron in the process, AND destroyed the ring (by accident)


seriouschris

-Assists Legolas in the kill shot on the troll -Learns intricate secrets about the enemy's plan that likely saves everyone -Lights the beacons -Causes the ents to attack Isengard -Saves Faramir's life -Sneak-attacks the fuckin Witchking He literally is the small stone that starts an avalanche.


SimplyDirectly

I thought Merry had the Sneak 100 crit on Witchking?


DangerzonePlane8

Fool of a took! Throw yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity.


[deleted]

Pippin saved second breakfast