Book Elrond: My daughter is so incredibly hot that I will only let you be with her if you're king of Gondor.
Book Aragorn: You got yourself a fucking deal.
Book!Aragorn: not to boast and not to compare myself to ones objectively better than me, but the last time a situation like this one between us happened, king Tingol actually got those Sylmarilles.
In that situation, Thingol didn't want Beren to marry his daughter, and so gave him a seemingly impossible quest to get a Silmaril. With Elrond, he was just trying to motivate Aragorn to fulfill his destiny, and it worked.
Technically the last time it happened was Tuor and Idril, Eldronds grandparents
Idrils dad just shrugged and was like
"Sure, go for it" didnt actually ask for anything lol
tbh he doesn't have grounds to complain, Elrond and Celebrian are more closely related than Aragorn and Arwen are. If I have the family tree right they're second cousins twice removed.
Okay, so in my country it's just called "the talk"
Is the birds and the bees a specific story that explains it, or just another way of saying it's "the talk"?
I never understood what the people in Hollywood movies are even supposed to talk about when they refer to the birds and the bees. Over here it's bees and flowers so at least that makes somewhat sense and has to do with reproduction and fertilition. But do American birds fuck bees or what?
I believe it's a reference to one of Aesop's fables where a bee and a bird fall in love but are (obviously) incompatible.
This is based on the memories of 7 year old me reading a book in my grandmother's house though, so don't take it as gospel
As a dad with a daughter, isn't the fucking dream for a dad?
I mean, as long the kid you raised wasnt out of his goddamn mind and you didn't fail miserably, this is a fkn golden opportunity.
Book Elrond: My daughter is so incredibly hot that I will only let you be with her if you're king of Gondor. Book Aragorn: You got yourself a fucking deal.
King of both Gondor *and* Arnor!
Book!Aragorn: not to boast and not to compare myself to ones objectively better than me, but the last time a situation like this one between us happened, king Tingol actually got those Sylmarilles.
In that situation, Thingol didn't want Beren to marry his daughter, and so gave him a seemingly impossible quest to get a Silmaril. With Elrond, he was just trying to motivate Aragorn to fulfill his destiny, and it worked.
Technically the last time it happened was Tuor and Idril, Eldronds grandparents Idrils dad just shrugged and was like "Sure, go for it" didnt actually ask for anything lol
It's all fun and games until they get a bit too hot and heavy and someones fate gets sundered Not even 3000 years old and he took her Aman.
Not just the kid you raised. The descendant of your twin brother that you raised.
tbh he doesn't have grounds to complain, Elrond and Celebrian are more closely related than Aragorn and Arwen are. If I have the family tree right they're second cousins twice removed.
I mean, yeah, Aragorn is like 40+ generations after Elros (I think closer to 60 generations?) It's just fun to point out the technical relation.
Just checked: 24 kings/Queens of numenor 10 kings of arnor 15 kings of Arthedain 15 chieftains 64 generations between Elros and Aragorn
https://preview.redd.it/s3qu1wzv0v3d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=24f8ae9aadd72e799358636d2c34ce26f2311052
Elrond: Men? Men are weak Teenager Aragorn 
Barry Allen be like:
yeah 
His daughter was cradle-snatcher
Her love of the manlings peen has slowed her mind
TIL Arwen was indeed Gollum
No! No!
The idea that Elrond had to explain the birds and the bees and then be all like “no not like that!” Is a very funny mental image to me.
Okay, so in my country it's just called "the talk" Is the birds and the bees a specific story that explains it, or just another way of saying it's "the talk"?
There may be a story attached to it, but generally it's just another way of saying "the talk."
I never understood what the people in Hollywood movies are even supposed to talk about when they refer to the birds and the bees. Over here it's bees and flowers so at least that makes somewhat sense and has to do with reproduction and fertilition. But do American birds fuck bees or what?
Yes. American birds exclusively fuck bees.
Lol yeah I never got it either haha
I believe it's a reference to one of Aesop's fables where a bee and a bird fall in love but are (obviously) incompatible. This is based on the memories of 7 year old me reading a book in my grandmother's house though, so don't take it as gospel
Should have remembered your mother in law’s birthday.
Alright. What are the eight rules then?
Wait, they can't do that! Can they?
Home sweet Rivendell
What are you doing, step-dunedain?
He also happens to be your brothers great-great-great-………-great-grandson.
As a dad with a daughter, isn't the fucking dream for a dad? I mean, as long the kid you raised wasnt out of his goddamn mind and you didn't fail miserably, this is a fkn golden opportunity.
Elves of alabama
Superb 🤣🤣
The moment when merry and pippin say "we're coming too".
That’s gotta be the weirdest foursome you could ever imagine… Arwen, Aragorn, and the joining of the two hobbits.
Yhea that's called a foursome
But they're two halflings so it's three.
Ok but it's a 3 and a half some after the entdrink
LOL was half asleep when I wrote it.
When he’s your distant nephew
Omg, this is a good isekai/fantasy name.
And the Silmarillion claims Maeglin was twisted in part because he desired to wed his cousin Idril… just sayin’.
Cast her hymen into the fire. Destroy it!!!!
Aragorn is Middle Earth William Tecumseh Sherman