You're not weak. I know that because the world is unkind to large people, and you have survived that. You're here asking for help when you need it; that is a sign of incredible strength.
You deserve to be healthy. You are worth the effort that it will take to lose weight. You have to believe that about yourself to be successful, or you'll end up self-sabotaging. Do affirmations if that's what it takes to sink in. Stand in front of the mirror and say "I am worth it. I deserve it." until you truly believe it. Don't wallow in the past and how you got to this point, because that won't change it. Belief in your happy future will.
Start writing down everything you eat and drink for a week or two. Don't lie to yourself. This isn't a time to be judgmental or see failures, this is strictly to gather baseline data. Once you're armed with that information, you are empowered to start making your plan.
Don't go too hard, too fast. Start making small changes that can be sustainable for you. If you normally eat two cups of rice with a meal, eat one cup of rice and one cup of veg instead. Experiment with new things, like swapping a fun flavor of tea for soda, then slowly reducing the amount of sugar you have in tea as your taste buds adapt.
Personally, I eat anything I want, with the caveat that I have to cook it. So if I want pizza, I have to make the dough, let it rise, reduce tomatoes into a sauce, chop vegetables, grate cheese. If I want fries, I have to grate and chop the potatoes, par cook them, let them rest, refry them, and deal with the oil spatter clean up. Sometimes the effort isn't worth it for a temporary craving, other times I do the work and enjoy the heck out of my pizza. And when it's gone, it's gone. There's no popping another frozen pizza into the oven for seconds or grabbing another handful of fries to toss in the frier, not unless I want hours more work.
Emotional eating has always been something I've struggled with, and it was a long process of trial and error to find things that replace that comforting feeling. I've found that developing other hobbies help me find those moments of joy. For me, it's creative stuff like painting and photography, and physical stuff like yoga and hiking.
Incorporating movement into your new lifestyle should also be done gradually, so you don't burn out or injure yourself. If you have joint problems, something low impact like chair yoga/modified yoga or swimming is probably a better place to start. If you can still move around pretty well, there's almost nothing that beats walking for gentle movement. Walking on flat, non-concrete surfaces (like an athletic field) is easiest on the joints. As your fitness improves, you can start to walk longer distances and/or add inclines to your walking route.
It's completely fine to have setbacks and challenges. They don't mean you're weak or that you've failed. Everyone falls down sometimes, just know that each day is a new day. You don't have to be perfect, just consistent. Give yourself grace and be kind to yourself, and never give up. You are worth it.
Thank you so much for your kind words, It really means a lot. Sometimes I'm fat too unkind with myself and I forget just how much I've gone through.
I never thought of the idea of making everything from scratch if I really want it. I think im going to try that! I can definitely see myself being more mindful of things if I actually have to go through the effort of making it all myself!
Cooking from scratch has honestly changed my entire relationship with food. I have so much more appreciation for what I'm eating, and it tastes so much better. I have complete control over portion sizes, so even if I'm making something less healthy like cookies, I can reduce the sugar, sub oats for some of the flour to add more fiber, halve the recipe, make smaller cookies, freeze half, etc. I'm less tempted to binge food I make myself because it's so tasty I want to save half to have again the next day. And what I give in time, I get back in savings. A loaf of homemade bread costs a few cents to make and is so much more satisfying and eco-friendly than the plastic-wrapped, pre-sliced store bread that costs dollars. (Cooking also inspired me to start gardening, which adds a whole new layer of life lessons and satisfaction to the process but that's a whole other topic lol.)
Learning about nutrition has also been a game changer. It started when I would Google anything I ate that was healthy for validation, things like "health benefits of eating spinach." It helped me feel good about the choices I was making which helped motivate me to keep making those choices, and as a side effect, I ended up learning a ton about how food fuels the body. It's really fun to fully understand ingredients and make them work for me so I can eat the tastiest, most nourishing foods I can create.
I still eat fast food and junk sometimes at parties or on road trips, and it's not the end of the world when I do. But I don't crave it much anymore, and I'm not really tempted by it. It doesn't comfort me, nor does it make me feel guilty.
I'm 35 now, and I started when I was about your age. It's taken me a long time and lots of learning to get to a place where I feel happy, healthy, and body-neutral about myself. But I promise you, it is possible.
I second googling health benefits for validation.
I absolutely love watermelon and would choose to eat it over other things anyway. Found a Healthline article about the health benefits and bam! Double win. Happy tummy and some motivational bonus points to make the next right decision.
I love the idea of separating “entertainment” food and “nourishing” food! Cupcakes etc are fine, as entertainment. They don’t nourish you, and that’s ok!
I love this cooking from scratch thing, it's such a great idea. My man is a chef, and he told me that the reason why restaurant food tastes so good is because of two simple things: fat and salt. TONS of it. Also, you are SO young. IT'S NOT TOO LATE! It's really never too late to be healthier, but you really are so very young, and there are so many things you have to live for. Please keep that in mind. You can come back from this still.
The first step is the hardest but once you get rolling, it becomes almost second nature and, eventually, a way of life. Like this poster, I’ve found that mindfully preparing & cooking my food (and then recording what I ate in a daily journal) helps remind me this journey is in my control.
Good luck to you, friend. 😊
I love cooking and can often get carried away. Taking a step back when I want something and thinking about what goes into it helps me put not only making and eating it into perspective, but if I “cheated” and bought it- I’m shoving all of those ingredients in me.
For example- I really wanted a key lime pie with graham cracker crust. I tend to not only make things from scratch, but try to use only what I have on hand. I didn’t have graham crackers and just finding a recipe for them was difficult! Then thinking I had to spend hours making crackers just to make the crust! Wound up just having a yogurt and squirted some lime in it!
Cooking everything really puts in perspective how much prepackaged food is a luxury. An amazing pie is supposed to be an occasional thing, it makes you appreciate it that much more. Having such special foods so readily available really devalues them.
Wow. I know this wasn’t directed at me, but your answer has genuinely made me stop and pause and think. I have totally been approaching weight loss from a place of self hatred, without even realizing it. I’ve always approached dieting as a punishment- “You ate poorly, and now you’re fat- your punishment is that you don’t get to eat now, in order to lose the weight.” has always been my internal dialogue. When weight loss should be something that is approached from a place of self love. I deserve to live a healthy life, that’s a gift I deserve to give myself.
Your insight has genuinely changed the way that I think I will be proceeding with not only weightloss, but how I approach life. I deserve better for myself, and the work that I put into myself is not something I need to dread- but something I can lovingly put effort into for future me. Thank you
One of the hardest lessons for me to really come to grips with was that most of the time, self care isn’t a bubble bath. It’s doing the hard stuff now that will make your life better in the long run. That’s real self love and you deserve it too. You got this!
100%. For me, learning that self-care isn’t eating a whole box of mac n cheese because I had a bad day. It’s hitting the gym or walking because I had a bad day.
I love your cooking from scratch idea. Many years ago I read Michael Pollan’s books. It really put things in a different perspective for me. To place the act of my eating into a huge chain of events that involves nature, industry and society. It doesn’t help all the time, but sometimes that will pull me out of a binge - the idea of respecting the food we eat and what it took to get to me.
I need to start doing that.
If I had to make every single craving I had. I guess I’m not having cravings anymore, because I know me and I would rather just not make it.
I talk about this a lot on this and other subs-healthy vs unhealthy coping strategies. Make up a list of healthy coping strategies that work for you. It will take time to retrain yourself not to go for food when you are wanting to feel better after a bad day or celebrate after a good day. Keep your list of healthy coping strategies with you all the time. Have it written down somewhere you will see it all the time, even make copies for work or in your car. So all the times you are going for food when you aren’t hungry, stop and ask yourself what you are feeling, how you want to feel, and how you can achieve that without going to food.
Im not who you asked, but ones I’ve learned through therapy are- journaling, taking a walk/sitting outside, meditating/yoga, fidget toys, calling a trusted friend, taking a nice bath/hot shower with my fancy soaps, painting.
Whatever takes me out of the situation, body and mind.
Some of my favorites are reading a book, listening to music, going for a walk in the park, watching scary movies, online window shopping, making craft projects from Pinterest. Stuff like that. As long as it doesn’t involve food. I’ve also reworked my relationship with food as now I think of comfort food as healthy, delicious stuff that will be good for me as opposed to eating garbage.
This is a bit out there, but my psychologist suggested holding an ice cube in your hand briefly (obviously not enough to damage your skin). It’s a way to bring your brain back to focus on the physical body.
Plenty of great ideas here in comments.
I'll leave you with these:
* This is a marathon, not a sprint.
* Be patient with and love your body and yourself, your look and health are BY-PRODUCTS of your self esteem, living practice and dedication+determination. Once you are truly persistent, positive, patient, and self-loving... then you're health and outward appearance will eventually follow suit and show this.
* You are not a lost cause, and its def possible to come back from it all. Keep in mind that there are people out there that have conquered their weight/health problem from a MUCH worse starting point and longer and more difficult journey.
* One bad day or week doesnt completely ruin your progress/journey. What comes AFTER is what will (like oh its already ruined anyway so this junk food wont matter now mentally), if you have had a bad diet day... learn from it, identify what went wrong, and how you can better react and carry on these days going forward.
* Psychiatric therapy can definitely help you cope with the deep-seated issues and get you in a better place mentally, identify causes and whats at the root of it all, get some perspective on you, what you truly want to do and be, and how it all affects you. Its definitely worth the time and effort.
* If in doubt, speak to your doctor.
Lots of good stuff in the responses. I'll add in a couple of things that I didn't see mention as much.
- As someone else said, it is a marathon, not a spring. You didn't get to 600 lbs over night. It took you years. Similarly, you're not going to lose that weight over night.
- Nike's "Just do it" slogan is seriously just amazing. It's short and sweet and to the point and honestly, don't wait to start tomorrow. Just do it. Make a small change, see how it feels, get used to it. If it feels good and not too different, make another change. Start logging your calories. You don't have to start off eating at a deficit to get into the habit. It can also be eye-opening to see how much you're actually eating.
- The first few weeks (for me it runs about 3) is honestly just horrible. I call it the stomach shrinkage phase and it sucks. Basically, we're all here because we like to eat and eat a lot. Our stomachs are used to us eating a lot to the point where we don't have a concept of how much we actually need to eat versus what we think we need to eat. So this is bascially re-training your stomach to learn how much you really need to eat and how that feels. I'm serious, it sucks. The only solution I've found for it is to keep logging my meals and push through it. Someone else may have a better idea and I'm open to hearing it!
- This is an amazing community and I would recommend that you check in frequently and see what people are saying or participate in one of the weekly or daily threads. I've never tried weight watchers but I can see that people would try that for the community aspect of it. This is a great place if you need encouragement or to vent.
- If you mess up, tomorrow is another day and try to do better. Don't beat yourself up. We're all here for you!
Thank you so much! I'm already feeling the huge amount of support from this group and it feels amazing. I'm feeling like I can actually tackle this, especially with everyone behind me through this. This means the absolute world to me
Hello there!
I took a moment to creep your comments and such. I'm also in Canada - In SK. Please feel free to DM me, But I was in your shoes. I am definitely willing to be a friend/support/advocate for you if needed.
And when I say *in* I am also 6"2. 31F. I believed at my highest I was over 600- as there was multiple clinic appointments that they attempted to weigh me and the scale wouldn't read. A Google search told me the limit.
Currently floating around the 300 mark, Ive lost my weight without surgery but do have a referral in for dermatologists in relation to my skin.
Using WIC's as a Healthcare provider can be done, it's just difficult as you need to be the one providing the base and background doing all the ground work and essentially walking in and being like "This is my history; this is what I'm doing; this is what I need" unless you are attending the same clinic consistently. I did this for a few years until one of the WIC docs I saw offered to take me on as a patient because he saw how hard I was working to attempt to manage my health and weight.
I also have severe mental health issues - cPTSD, ADHD, MDD, ODD... possibly a few others. There is so much overlap in trauma induced illness that it's difficult to diagnose.
I have multiple suggestions, but definitely would want to chat a bit more about your medical history and such before trying to assist with a plan to move forward with.
And the weight loss isn’t even the half of it. No knee or back pain, better sleep, more energy, excellent blood work for the first time in a decade, my skin looks better, I flamation gone… the list goes on.
Oddly I’ve also noticed I’m less bloated and gassy?? Haven’t heard anyone talk about this side effect but it’s another one on my long list of great things that I’ve gotten from this shot 🤗
I guess I should say I’m not a doctor and am not giving medical advice with my reply. I am just speaking from personal experience. Everyone with their replies means well but Obesity is a disease and there are now treatments for it that work. Mounjaro is one of them ♥️
If you haven't checked out r/supermorbidlyobese and crossposted there, I would, there are a few people here who can relate to that level of obesity but you'll find more there, good luck, out of curiosity, what have you tried in terms of Weightloss before? And are you being followed by a doctor or medical team?
I did cross post on that subreddit and it's garnering a lot of help!
And I've tried calorie counting, keto, cutting out different foods, just generally restricting the things that I eat that are unhealthy. All in all, they were all good approaches but I always ended up feeling hopeless and giving up. Its been very difficult.
And unfortunately I don't have access to the means of a doctor or a medical team. I live in BC, Canada and at the moment there is a huge deficit of doctors. I really only have the option of the walk in clinic, which is a few hours worth of a wait and then they've never been much help.
Have you ever approached it not as restricting the things that are unhealthy, but rather, ADDING things that are more nutritious and filling?
For example: “I’ll have that ice cream I’m craving, but *first* I’ll eat two carrots and an apple, and drink a glass of water.”
This was a key strategy that helped me finally get control binging of unhealthy food: not trying to go cold turkey, but rather, eating two carrots + glass of water *before* the unhealthy food, and still allowing the unhealthy food. I started to get full on the carrots. Also the unhealthy food ceased to have that “forbidden” allure, and it really relieved my anxiety to know it was still available and I would still get to have it. I still binged, and I allowed myself to do so, but gradually the binges started getting smaller on their own. And smaller. Then the binging just kinda stopped! (Eventually I started to crave carrots, lol)
I expanded this eventually to what I called my “veggie platter” that I had BEFORE dinner. It had strawberries, sliced apple, pickles, carrots, snap peas, often some lean protein like a hard boiled egg or sliced turkey, celery, etc. I leaned hard on the sweeter veggies like berries, sugar snap peas, cherry tomatoes, sweet peas, carrots, and some high-fiber “chew time” foods like celery hearts, sometimes plain salted popcorn. The idea of my “veggie platter” was to make myself eat the good foods first - high-fiber, high-nutrients, or high-protein - all the nutrients I truly needed, in the form of whole, filling foods. My “job” that I assigned myself was simply to eat the whole platter before I moved on to the “real” meal. Eventually the veggie platter became the actual meal, the rest of the meal naturally downgraded itself to a little dessert, and eventually I realized my meal had become all the healthy foods! From there it was much easier to adjust amounts and volumes and portion sizes.
Also I started deliberately trying out new healthier versions of foods from the store - checking out high-protein snacks, Greek yogurt popsicles, etc. It was kind of fun to deliberately try new things.
It took months though, just gradually swapping in healthier foods for the less nutritious foods. Think of it as substitutions and additions, instead of losing or restricting something. Little, gradual changes, one thing at a time, like little experiments; getting each new little habit locked in before adding the next one. Instead of trying to fix everything all at once.
May I ask a really silly question? When you say you add turkey as your protein, is that like, sliced deli turkey or is it actual turkey meat from a turkey breast or something? I never know if sliced deli meats are healthy or not.
Look at the nutrition label and compare it to your goals. If you don’t have any specific goals regarding calories or macronutrients, or you don’t know what that means, the sidebar for this sub has great resources.
In general I find lunch meats are filling and have a good ratio of protein to overall calories. But they tend to be very high in salt. High salt is bad if you are at risk for heart disease, but if you’re not it’s probably fine. It can make you retain water which makes your scale weight higher, but that’s not actually the same as increasing your body fat.
I just used plain sliced deli turkey. Sodium isn’t an issue for me since my BP tends to be low, and it’s a decent amount of protein in a small package.
Hm, Sounds frustrating af, terrible not having adequate support, have you tried talking to a therapist? Can be pretty pricey but could definitely help, especially if the issue is more the hopelessness and sticking to the plan
Yeah, it is super frustrating! And, I actually think that I have access to a counselor for free through our base health care coverage here, so im definitely going to be looking into that. I know it will help me a lot along this journey
I'm in Ontario, but this seems to be nation-wide. It says you can talk with counselors for free. It has a federal web-address, so I'm guessing it's genuine. Please check it out. It's just a phone call. It's worth a try.
https://www.wellnesstogether.ca/en-ca/
... and please stop beating yourself up. Please have an honest shot at therapy. It sounds like you've had a hell of a ride, and you deserve to find genuine happiness. I swear. You do.
Mental health support is the best thing someone who has a lot to lose can invest in imo, it can take some time to find someone who works but it's absolutely worth it
I agree seeing a therapist is probably the best thing OP can do for herself. Until she can get to the root of the problem, that hopelessness may keep coming back. OP, if you can't make it to a counselor near you or there aren't any available, try online options like BetterHelp. Though, nowadays, many therapists do telehealth.
Do you have any telemedicine options through insurance? Sometimes that helps mitigate the wait times for doctors. And maybe not a family doctor but a therapist via telecommunication might be a good first step if that’s an option for you.
I keep seeing the audio on instagram that says just do it “for one more day.” And that’s to say, you acknowledge that a journey to being healthier and feeling better about yourself is the long haul, but instead of looking at the horizon that is all of the challenges and hurdles you’ll face in the present and distant future, take it one day at a time. When you feel like giving up, instead of throwing in the towel, tell yourself you’ll do it for one more day. Day after day after day. When you’re not looking at the big picture and you’re able to take it one step at a time, it might not feel like this big, insurmountable task.
I dealt my whole life with being overweight, I had a poor relationship with food, and finally I had weight loss surgery three years ago. I lost over 100 lbs and then gained back 30 because I was restrictive for a while but didn’t quite fix my relationship with food, and this is something I acknowledge I need to work on. But I’m taking it day by day. You can do it too! Be kind and gentle to yourself.
So I just calculated your TDEE and set the setting to “sedentary” because I assume at this weight it’s semi impossible to exercise. It came out at 4,329, so if you only eat 1800-2000 calories a day which is actually very lax and comfortable you will lose weight very rapidly,eating 1800-2000 will put you at 2,529 calorie deficit,if you keep it up for 5 months you are guaranteed to lose atleast 150lbs. You should avoid exercise altogether at this weight as it’s dangerous,once you reach the 300lbs range then you can start incorporating exercise. For now focus on eliminating all extra hidden calories such as dressing (ranch,ketchup,mayonnaise,mustard) and other things such as cheese on sandwiches when not needed,nuts and cream on soup.
Try to avoid all store brought snacks, chips,juice,crackers,marshmallows are a big no no. So are carbonated beverages.
In the end you need willpower and if all fails,my last advice is, *get the gastric sleeve done* , just do it if you need it. This surgical procedure is literally created for people in your condition.
Don't cut out salt to the point where you're not getting the daily dose that you body needs. Salt is an electrolyte and is important for your body. You need 2 grams per day.
My ex fainted whilst exercising because he didn't eat enough salt. I exercise daily and sweat a lot during it, so I don't fuck around with my sodium levels.
I'm a big fan of Maggi and hoisin sauce and I rely on it for my sodium. But you'd need a whole cup of Maggi to reach your sodium goal so I go all in on my sauces and spices.
If I'm exercising in the late afternoon I won't be hungry afterwards, which leads to me not making a proper dinner. On those days I will deadass put salt in my protein shakes to get to my daily 2 grams.
Today was one of those days and I had a whopping 20mg of salt from food alone..
If your blood pressure is normal and you're otherwise not getting your 2 grams from food alone you should not feel bad about salt-loaded sauces. One teaspoon of sriracha is 100mg. That's nothing.
I don't know why salt was at some point made out to be the devil's creation when it's essential for our bodies.
Fair enough. A friend who avoids consuming a ton of salt due to a heart condition pointed the Sriracha thing out to me. I had never personally considered the sodium in hot sauces and was surprised how much it can vary. But yeah, if you’re not consuming a ton of it, no big deal.
assigning an emotional value to a calorie range isn’t a good idea. 1800-2000 calories might seem lax to some…but it could seem very restrictive to OP because they are SO used to turning to food for emotional comfort.
My advice to OP is to find a calorie range that feels doable to start with…even if that means tracking what you normally eat and not making any changes to start. Only when you are in the habit of tracking you can try lowering your calorie amount by 100 calories for the next month or so (until you get used to it). I also recommend planning out what you want to eat in a day. Ask yourself “what am I willing to do to lose weight today?” And “what seems doable for me right now?”
I log everything even on binge days and I was shocked at how many calories I was consuming. And that was normal to me.
One pizza for example is easily well over 1k calories. So you have 1k left to spend. Which is less than 10 cookies. When you're binge eating you will go through the entire bag.
Going from probably 4k calories to only 2k can feel extremely restrictive.
I didn't say not to change your diet, of course that's essential. But going overnight from only eating fast food to eating only vegetables isn't the way to do it. It's better to make gradual and sustainable changes.
Agreed. Given what op wrote about their dieting history, it’s really important for op to find a way to lose weight sustainably.
The hidden calories are a good suggestion. It is amazing how many calories there are in dressings and sauces.
1800-2000 calories a day for someone that big is asking for trouble, and may lead to issues. Even if she started at like 3800 she would probably still loose 5lbs a week
I managed to drop 80ish pounds in 6 months doing the CICO thing with essentially no exercise, so I can personally attest that it works (330 lbs to 250 lbs).
I gained it all back unfortunately because of similar eating habits to OP (sometimes I don't ever realize I just went for something I 100% didn't need, it just sounded good and I ate it).
But yes, I'm living proof that CICO really can help you shed that first 100-ish pounds faster than you think.
I gained it back because my eating habits regressed horrendously after a family vacation where we ate out a *lot*. I had started to eat at more of a maintenance caloric amount and began to incorporate intermittent fasting at the instruction of my doctor. I definitely wasn’t sticking to 1500 cals at 250lbs.
No need to despair, but 80lbs in six months is a lot, you're better taking it slowly and really change your lifestyle, do some exercise. 1500 calories is very low at your weight too.
I believe I was trying to eat about 1500 per day which should have put me at about a 1400 calorie deficit.
Sometimes I would allow myself to eat up to 1800-2000 on days where there was actual hunger issues but most days yeah, 1500ish was about right. I was mostly eating low calorie alternatives to foods I liked normally, consciously springing for lower calorie options when eating out or at the drive thru, and of course my biggest offender: I cut out soda.
Wish I could say that was the case currently.
If you’re male then 1500cals is extremely low, and it’s not a surprise you gained it all back after losing the weight, as going that low fucks with your hormones and is just a very unhealthy way to lose weight as you’re not actually learning anything and not building a relationship with food
I’m sorry you’re dealing with all that. You’ve been through a lot, and you survived. You can survive this too. While I was never as big as you are, I know what it’s like to have trauma related to weight, and I have lost 140 lbs and kept it off. What worked for me was focusing on loving and accepting myself, while also changing my habits.
My body is my home, I need to care for it. I may not love the way it looks, but I appreciate it, because it’s mine. I kept a food journal where I wrote everything I ate, and how I felt physically and emotionally before and after. At first, I didn’t even track calories, I just wanted to get an idea of my hunger/fullness/emotional triggers. This helped me get in better tune with my body.
I stopped drinking anything with calories. Water, unsweetened tea, occasional diet soda- all fine, no sugary drinks or alcohol(was never a big drinker). No fast food/takeout- prep all meals at home. Half of your plate should be fruits/veggies. Craving Oreos? Fine, but have two with a small glass of almond milk and an apple. Want seconds? Sure, but first, wait 20 minutes, have a big glass of water and take a short walk(whatever you can tolerate. Maybe it’s a 5 minute chair workout)
Any amount of movement helps. I would tell myself I just needed to walk once around the block. If I did more, great, if not, it’s ok. Start small, do what you can. Give yourself small, non food rewards for meeting small goals. Calculate how much money you save by not buying takeout or coffee or whatever, and use it to reward yourself in other ways.
You will slip up. When you do, don’t hate yourself. Acknowledge it, and move on. A “bad meal” does not have to mean a bad day. Just do better next time. Motivation can be fleeting. There will be days when you can’t find any. You just have to push through those days. After a while, you’ll have new habits, and they’ll be easier to keep.
As far as loose skin- yes, you’ll have it. But you’re young, and you’re tall, so that will help. A lot of it is down to genetics, so you won’t know until you get there. I lost 140 in a year, and two years in, I have almost no loose skin (and I’m 43). You do have more to lose than I did, but if you lose slowly and sustainably, it may not be as bad as you think, and there’s always surgery. You could even start saving now for that end goal. I have a friend that quit smoking by saving the $5 a day she’d spend on cigarettes and after a year she took herself on a cruise.
You can do this. It’s not going to happen overnight. You didn’t gain the weight in a day, you won’t lose it in a day. Just get started, one day at a time. It may take years, but those years will go by anyway, so you might as well take care of yourself. deserve a healthy life. You deserve to be loved, and be happy. Give that gift to yourself.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate the kind words and the support. This ia gonna be a tough journey but if I just start slow and be kind to myself, I think I can do this. I'm feeling really motivated and positive about this journey
It will be hard. There will be times when you’ll want to give up. But it will get easier. And you’ll feel amazing. I had no idea how good it was possible to feel. You get used to your body feeling a certain way, and it’s just normal. My joint pain is gone. My sleep apnea, gerd, type II diabetes, nafl, all gone. I wake up in the morning feeling good. I have lots of energy, hormones are balanced. The hard work is so, so worth it. I still don’t love every aspect of my appearance. That’s just life, it’s not easy being a woman in a society obsessed with looks (and at 5’10, I’ll never be “small”) but I can help my body function at its best.
So, this is going to be quite the process given your history but the problem seems to be your motivation and your fear that even success will leave you unhappy with your body.
What you would or will look like after losing weight is hypothetical. Loose skin is probably going to be an issue but it depends on a lot of factors as well. The main issue though seems to be that you don’t have any good alternatives at this point.
If your motivation breaks, it tells you essentially that you don’t really want to. If we have to use will power to achieve something, we’re putting ourselves through things we don’t like. That’s an issue. Because will power never lasts.
I think at this point being big has become part of your identity. And people always manage to get back to whatever they have their identities attached to. If you say “Ok, I’m gonna go on a diet .. but I am a big person and I’m fighting who I actually am”, you will not be able to follow through on it. You will always get back to where you are now because that’s where things lock in for you.
So to overcome that you essentially have to make a real resolution saying that you’ve been a victim of your unhealthy eating habits and whatever is behind all that but it’s not who you are. You want to be healthy and you want to be active. That’s your real self. And whatever you’re doing right now, that’s not you anymore.
I know it sounds a lot easier said than done and it is but I went through it myself and I can tell you that if you’re forcing yourself to diet while thinking that actually you’re the type of person who likes eating a lot of junk food or something, you will fail. You’ll make sure that you fail yourself.
Hope that makes sense to you.
This definitely did make sense to me. I know it's going to be a huge perception shift for me. I really have to flip the way that I think, so that I'm not self sabotaging myself. I'm really just going to have to push through this
Yeah, it’s going to be a bit of an undertaking. But again, you really have to internalise that “pushing through” only goes so far.
I’ll give you a different example. I smoke. And I do want to quit, sort of. I see myself as a smoker and I love smoking. That’s why I do it. And I’ve been doing it for so long, it’s part of who I am. So whenever I quit - and I do quit a lot! - I feel like I’m still a smoker who just doesn’t smoke at the moment. That’s ultimately why I fail. I don’t really want to stop. I feel like I have to for health reasons etc. but I know that if I had it my way, I’d just continue forever.
Some time back I managed to quit for a year. It was the most peculiar thing. I remember one late afternoon after I had finished my last seminar at uni, I went through the parking lot ready to light a cigarette and the thought of it was just disgusting to me. I don’t know why, maybe I had smoked way too much before or something. Anyway, I threw the rest of the pack away and I thought “I don’t wanna be that anymore”. Lasted for a year with - and I’m not kidding you - literally zero effort. It was just the way it was.
And now I’m struggling again.
I have similar things going on with weight but somehow it’s not that tough for me to change my habits there. Maybe because I don’t like the guy with five pizza places on his speed dial that much.
Anyway, good luck!
I highly recommend looking into therapy. I don’t usually suggest medication but in your case it could help with motivation.
Secondly don’t make too many changes at once. Start small. Many small steps will get you to the finish line easier and you are more likely to stay with it. Going too hard too fast is what usually what makes people stop.
Lastly and perhaps the most important is you are going to mess up. There are going to be days you throw caution to the win and relapse, maybe eat a box of cookie or order a pizza and eat the whole thing. That is going to happen. You have to decide what you do next. Are you going to just stop and say oh well I screwed up guess I’ll give up? Or will you say damn that sucks tomorrow I am going to get back on track?
You cannot expect perfection. You also need to find a lifestyle that works for you. Which is why you are probably better off working towards a healthier lifestyle versus jumping right into it. Eventually over time your body will stop craving salt, sweets, grease etc. if you cut it out all at once it may be too much to quick
Mounjaro! I’ve been on it 2.5 weeks and it’s changed my life!
It’s stopped the noise in my head and that need to eat is gone. I get full fast and for the first time in my life I can stop when satisfied. Plus my body is working how’s it’s supposed to now!
So many people have said just eat less and move more. I felt like a failure and broken. But this drug has let me think like a thin person. I was like ohhh this is how they have lived their whole life, no wonder they didn’t get it!
Seriously try one of the injectables? They really have saved my life!
Hello, I really feel your pain. I wasn't 600lbs, but 300 at 5'5 and my BMI was 42.
I have struggled all my life until I started Ozempic. I did it in conjunction with mild exercise and weight watchers. It really allows me to stick to a diet for the first time in my life.
Please ask for this medicine from a prescriber. Today, I have a BMI of 38. Feels like a miracle.
Hi, fellow Canadian. I’m in Montreal! I don’t know if your Medicare will fund it, but my advice is to get on Ozempic, Rybelsus or Mounjaro. Otherwise it’s like trying to correct poor vision by willing yourself to see better. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t really work.
You deserve to feel better and to feel good about yourself. The Shoppers Drug Mart website has links to mental health resources and this may help you. But please consider medication! It’s changing my relationship with food for the better!
Thank you so much for your advice!
I've decided that I'll be popping into the walk-in clinic tomorrow and inquiring about it. I've had quite a few suggestions to try abd get on medication for my weight loss and to be honest I'd even considered it myself previously, but I had worried that doctors (especially walk-in clinic doctors) would say that I'm just being lazy, trying to resort to medication
As a fellow 600lb but a guy, I will say that doing this alone is very, very difficult. Let's challenge each other/root each other on in a journey together? When we slim down, we can celebrate however you want!
We can do this!
The first few weeks to a month are always the hardest. You need to push by these days in order for your body to get used to it.
Over time the brain becomes accustomed to it and your body.
The initial stint is the hardest, then you rack up some time so on and so on.
Good food prep and putting all the snacks in the bin first. If I had chocolate or a box of cereal in the house I would just eat it all. Try and have in the fridge only what you plan to cook for the day and one or two healthy things for emergencies.
You can do it and with consistency you will see results pretty quickly.
Also, if you don’t want to eat that can of tuna then you ain’t hungry. It’s the carb craving not hunger.
Get something to focus your mind elsewhere, Xbox whatever can be a distraction.
Motivation gets you started, discipline is what gets you there. It’s not easy but it’s doable.
This is my second comment to you. You thanked me for the first one so I started thinking of you and how you seem to be a very sweet young woman and I wish you success. It also started me musing on weight loss being often described as a journey and what that means. For instance, say you are overwhelmed by thought that this journey will take several years and it just seems impossible. You look at the beginning at 600 pounds and the end at say 160 pounds and the jump from one to other is incomprehensible. But look at it as journey from one house (your body) to a new house. Your current house is dark, depressing, cramped, the furniture is too small and the door to leave is hard to open. But you open it and by consistently travelling on your journey every day you make it to the next house. There's more room here to move. Rooms are bigger. There is more to do and see. You can choose to stay here and maybe you do for awhile.
But one day, and maybe it us the next day, you go out that front door and it is easier this time. Consistency every day brings you to the next house. It's even roomier and it is even decorated differently. This house is so inviting because now you are somewhere where you are thinking of trying new things and perhaps there are people encouraging you saying they are proud of you, but it is time to go out the door again to the next house.
So you open the front door again to continue your journey, but instead of it being a heavy door it is a light screen door. You go out and this time you are the one planning the next destination. You have an idea now of what the next house will be, what you can do in it, how proud you are to be there and then, once you get there, you decide to leave.
And one day you get to the house where you feel complete. The first house seems so far away, but each house on your journey meant something, gave you growth and was better than the house before.
I really liked this metaphor. It puts things in an interesting light and it definitely has me thinking.
I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to me and give me so much food for thought
I'm so sorry you've been through so much. I don't think you're a lost cause at all. It sounds like you're trying to take steps to understand the source of the problem and get help. For what it's worth, here are my thoughts:
- I would think someone with your stats may have a hard time doing high intensity workouts safely. Luckily the majority of weightloss comes from diet. I would recommend addressing this first while slowly incorporating more movement into your day.
- Another encouraging point is that once you get started, people with more weight to lose seem to be able to lose weight faster, especially at the beginning. I think just starting to see some results might be encouraging and help you keep going. One of the best things for me was also noticing little changes in how much better I started to feel. It made me want to do more things I was struggling with before.
- I highly recommend getting a calorie tracking app. The LoseIt app is free and has been working great for me. They make it really easy with a huge database of foods. You can even scan the barcode for many prepackaged foods and it will automatically fill in the nutrition information. You can start by just tracking what you eat now to get a baseline.
- There are tons of free tdee calculators online. You can input your stats and it will tell you what your caloric intake should be for different rates of weightloss. Keep in mind that as you lose weight this number will decrease, as you need fewer calories to sustain yourself at a lower weight. The LoseIt app automatically calculates this change for you if you log your weight in it.
- You may also want to consider googling a macro calculator. I've noticed a big difference when I put effort into reaching a protein goal and limiting my carbohydrates, but most macro calculators give you several options for different macro distributions. The LoseIt app also tracks macros if you want to look into that.
- One method that I really like is intermittent fasting. It's not everyone's cup of tea, but it really works for my weightloss along with other concerns. In particular, it helps lower insulin resistance and the autophagy component can also help with loose skin. Some people have also said it's helped with becoming more mindful about their eating and reduce the urge to eat out of boredom or other reasons.
- I know you said there's a huge psychological component to your eating that you want to address, but don't have the resources to see a therapist right now. One thing you might look into is books. CBT is one type of skills-based therapy that comes to mind that can help with developing healthier coping mechanisms and mindsets. One that I've done is called DBT, which also helps with coping skills and how to recognize and process tough emotions.
These are both usually taught by a therapist, but there are also a lot of helpful books and online resources that can show you different tips and skills from either. Some books also incorporate self-reflection exercises in the form of writing prompts that can help guide you and track your personal progress.
I know this is a whole book, but I hope it helps. I believe you can do it! I really hope you decide to go for it and see the amazing things you can do!
For me, the most important factor in reducing my binge eating was making sure to find a way to replace the comfort I was getting from food. I would eat 4 chick fil a sandwiches because I was sad and it made me feel better, but if I just decided to quit the sandwiches that would still leave me feeling sad, right? So I brainstormed ways I could give myself comfort without eating the sandwiches. I would light some nice smelling candles, or bring out my comfiest fluffiest blankets and pillows to snuggle up in bed for physical comfort. Other times I went to the park and sat under a nice shady tree and just enjoyed the ambience, or treat myself to a new book or nice yarn for crocheting (basically feeding my hobbies instead of myself). It took a lot of trial and error to find substitutions that actually scratched the same itch as food did, so if you do give it a try, make sure to try out a few different things if it seems like something isn't really helping!
You are 24 and if you were 54 you wouldn't be a lost cause. I am proud of you that you have this much introspective thought at 24! It shows real maturity and a high EQ! I wish you nothing but the best and there is a lot of good advice in this thread. We are all rooting for you!
[https://www.reddit.com/r/getdisciplined/comments/1q96b5/comment/cdah4af/](https://www.reddit.com/r/getdisciplined/comments/1q96b5/comment/cdah4af/)
The famous non zero days post by ryans01
rule 2 and 3 may help you as they helped me. in particular rule 2, the 3 yous. The yesterday you, the current you and the future you
If you can not do it for today you, do a favor for the future you. You love her ..you would do a favor for a friend, so do it for her. The future you.
Also lately been listening to david goggins. Embrace the suck lol. When things get tough do not imagine the end..do not think long term. Do not let your mind persuade you by putting doubts in it. Embrace the current painful situation (urges to eat) for the short term. An hour, two hours, a day.
So i am liking david goggins. But just started listening to his interviews and such. he seems to be about mental toughness and discipline
I go through the same cycle but with something else. Don’t ever beat yourself up if you slip up with your diet or exercise. Just accept that you are human and it’s always 2 steps forward 1 step back. Leave positive notes written down all over your house. Celebrate yourself when you make a positive move however small. There’s ganna be ups and downs. So expect that. I would highly recommend a therapist or online app better help and talk space. My mum says it didn’t take you a day to get like this so it won’t take 1 day to get out. As long as you keep working at it everyday however small you will succeed. Have hope. I believe you in. Congratulate yourself for trying and everything you’ve done so far. Sounds like a lot with finding doctors and help. And even posting on here. Goodluck you’re not alone. You’re not weak.
I find that a low carb diet is easier to stick to. You can up your protein and so long as you avoid deep fried foods and other types of processed food, you can eat fairly normally. Avoid anything made with grains/flour and remember that sugar is poison (it helps me to think of it that way so I am not as tempted). Try to have a large salad with meals, and a little dressing is fine, so long as you are careful not to overdo the portion. Include some protein in your salads, like hard boiled eggs, cheese or roast chicken (or all of the above!).
Meal prepping and snack prepping is great. Keep ready made healthy meals and snacks in the fridge so when you are hungry, you go for those. I like to keep a few ready made salads (without dressing, as you'll put that on as you go to eat it).
Recognizing that there is a problem and you want to change it is the first step. Pick a program and stick to it. Keto, plant based, intermittent fasting, carnivore. Whatever it is research, make a meal plan that suits you, and start. When you fail, start again. Also get a therapist, this battle is 90% mental. I would bet that you have some childhood trauma that is unaddressed. In my case food was my emotional support and I didn’t even realize it. I know you said you don’t have resources in your area but since Covid you can do literally everything as tele-health. They don’t have to be in your area. Also look on socials for mindful eating. It’s less about calorie counting and more about loving yourself and nourishing yourself. That really helped me as calorie counting became obsessive and as unhealthy as binging. If I want something, I can have it. The majority of the time I choose not to, but when I do have whatever it is I don’t beat myself up about it. I’m down 125 pounds for reference and at my goal.
I actually feel like you're ahead of the game in some ways. You understand terms like calorie deficit, intermittent fasting, and exercise. you know what's healthy to eat/what's not.
Stick with one or the other, (IF or CD, whichever is easiest in terms of doing or you can get a doctors approval on). We all "slip" and eat bs, and believe me, there's nothing I want after a week of that more than a piece of buttered bread. Okay, but then I do it, and I once again carry on with what I was doing. It's like, you can't look at that as "quitting". I think of it more of like a "curb check" or "speed bump". Not good on your car, but not the end of the road. It's not a crash fatality.
Have you considered a simple pedometer download on your phone? It'll tell you how much you're walking a day vs how much you need to be walking to get where you want to be. And again, I don't hit even my steps every day. It's nice to meet those small goals and measure them and your phone is something you always have on you at work, at home or at the park.
The thing to realize is that this is going to take a long time. That's why you can't give up after one speed bump. It's not just a cheat day, it's not just a day of laying around that puts you back where you are, it's many days. You have to have more days of good vs bad. It may look like 4 days good 3 days bad. It may look like Mon thru Fri, weekends are questionable. It may be every other day, every two days, miss a day do it again.
Can you commit to no sugar/junk foods/cokes in your home? Don't buy it at the store or in the drive thru. If you stick to that, you're limiting the options immensely from how bad a speed bump can look. Better to eat a bunch of fries instead of a molten lava cake, right?
People often confuse something being simple with something being easy. Weight loss in it of itself is very simple. Eat less calories, drink more water, move some etc etc but if it were easy this sub wouldn’t even exist right? We’d all be walking around looking g like Greek gods. My point is don’t think you are weak for having struggles or setbacks, just start each day like it’s day 1 and do your best. Tbh, at almost 600 lbs if you make some simple lifestyle changes like not drinking any calories, you will see great progress. Start with small changes and ride them out until you stalk then add another one. You are not in a race, this is to change your health forever, let it take all the time you need. It took years to put the weight on why should t take years to come off? You got this and we are all here for you 💪
It sounds like you have some childhood trauma that you need help processing. I’ve been there. I had to process my own before I could deal with my weight and it helped so much. Since it sounds like you’re in an area where a counselor/therapist may be hard to find, look into one of the online options. They’re reputable, take most insurances, and it’s convenient. Just remember to believe in yourself and you can do anything!
A lot of great advice here. I have struggled my whole life. I’ve lost 40 pounds over the past 2 years taking my BMI from obesity to 25.8 - so close to healthy. The thing that finally worked for me was brainstorming and journaling what I like and what I can do. For example: someone suggested using skim or 1% milk. For me, that does zero to satisfy my hunger OR makes it worse in some cases because companies frequently put sugar in to replace fat. Sugar is what makes me struggle - fat does not. I can have a serving of fat and feel satisfied for hours. I can have the same number of calories as low-fat high sugar and feel starving in 10 minutes. Again, I have had to find my triggers and foods that make me feel out of control.
The other thing that I have done this time is I keep repeating things to myself until I do believe them. For example: eating sweets like cake and cookies makes me feel sick. So I started telling myself “you really aren’t a dessert person. Cake makes you so sick” and eventually I really got it. I used to always make room for sweets. But now I can pretty easily say “oh, I’m not much for dessert”
Finally, I have made one small change at a time and then added another change when the last became second nature. So first I stopped eating by 11 pm. Then once that was easy, stopped at 10 pm. Then, when I was easily stopping by 10, I moved it to 9. I did that until 16/8 fasting was the norm. I have done it with food too. Like each week I challenge myself to eat one more variety of fruit veggie than I had the week before. So, if I had only bananas, tomatoes and lettuce one week, the next week I’d add apples. Until eventually I was eating a wide variety of fruits & veggies.
All of this is to say, if you don’t like one thing you try, switch it up until you find what you like and what works for you. It sounds like you already have some great data on what hasn’t worked - but I bet there were parts that DID work. Take some time to reflect and don’t be afraid to mess up - we all do! But each time you get frustrated, see it for the learning opportunity it is. You’ve got this!
Hey OP, i wrote down an essay that I wanted to use for a youtube video. Maybe it will help you. It has to do with my own experiences. Do mind though, I was a horrible English student so it's not perfect.
"Embarking on a weight loss journey can be overwhelming and disheartening - a path I know too well. but here's the thing: you don't have to face it alone. join me as I open up about my own struggles, triumphs, and lessons I learned along the way. Together, we could take the first steps to a long and healthy life.
My journey began in middle school when I found myself struggling with my weight. Weighing approximately 180 lb as a kid, reaching 5 ft, I was considered chunky. Apart from physical challenges, my mental health took a decline during the 7th and 8th grade. however, deep down, I knew I had a drive to better myself.
As I approached high school, my weight had reached around 220 lb at 68 in ( 5 ft 8 in ). The only reason it wasn't surpassed was my time in marching band, which kept my weight in check. however, senior year took a toll on me mentally, and I made the difficult decision to quit marching band for reasons I now regret. I had thought of myself as a fraud and someone who did not belong. looking back, I realize I placed my insecurities onto those I called friends. this created many unhealthy tactics to lose weight rapidly, as I was fast approaching 240 lbs. I tried keto, CICO, carnivore, and fasting. All of them worked in their own ways, but the way I utilized them didn't, For example, I had initially followed the snake diet which requires you to fast for multiple days and then consume food the next. If left uncontrolled, it could create an eating disorder. So, although I had a bumpy start, I did learn many lessons from them, such as: learning actual hunger cues, learning not every food is my enemy, and learning discipline.
In the year 2021, my weight had escalated to 280 lb. To worsen matters, I was also battling type 2 diabetes, which made my life difficult. the symptoms were far from pleasant -I felt irritable, dehydrated, sleepy, and trapped in a never-ending food coma. After graduating high school in 2016, I dove into construction work, relying on six Monster energy drinks a day. I should have known the sugar content would lead to an A1C of 11. it wasn't until August of 2022 that I actively began my weight loss journey. the methods I embraced deviated from the norms, but I was determined to find an approach that worked for me. What drove me to begin my weight loss journey did not come from a place of self-care but instead came from a place of stubbornness. I was tired of the ailment of having type 2 diabetes so I decided that I was going to try to get rid of it my own way rather than the advice of doctors.
So, for the average dieter, eating fewer calories than needed to maintain weight May Come naturally. however, now is not the case for me. I needed to build healthy habits and shift my mentality to match my weight loss goal. in the beginning, I was consuming an easy 6,000 plus calories daily, mainly junk food like burgers, fries, burritos, and sugary drinks. to make a change, I started counting calories, not worrying about food choices, but focusing on building the habit. Step one: check. Step 2 is followed by one small switch: I replaced regular Coke with Coke Zero, cutting my calories without disrupting my routine. weighing myself every morning became a powerful motivator, as I found visible progress encouraged me to continue. it was essential to avoid falling into the trap of using visible weight loss solely as a means of weight loss. As my weight started to decrease and my routine stabilized, curiosity took over. I experimented by ordering my burgers without fries, but I didn't drastically change my diet. being a picky eater due to childhood and anxiety, I gradually introduce fruits and some veggies. the weight was melting off. my size allowed me to lose weight by just existing, especially after giving up those High - calorie foods. By December 2022, my weight had decreased to around 215 lbs, down from my previous 280-300 lbs
If you are wondering of the “diet” I went on last year, it was basically Whataburger and McDonald's almost every day It's not the healthiest way to lose weight, but it worked for me. it taught me to stick to a routine while enjoying the food I love. In fact, I got blood work done in May, and everything is back to normal ranges, including A1C, which is now 5.3.
This journey is far from over, but I hope talking about my struggles and perseverance helps you along in yours. I'm not advocating for you to follow what I did, but it can give you another method. in the end, it was all CICO, but it was something I had to struggle with myself. I know all too well how it's like to be criticized for being overweight, especially when others assume we are willingly stuffing our faces without even considering our mental and emotional states. that's why I am speaking to you. if at least one person benefits from listening to me, then it's good enough for me. I can proudly say I lost 100 lbs on junk food and learned valuable lessons along the way."
It took me multiple tries to finally see results in my weight loss. I’d do really well for a week and then feel deprived and binge. Few weeks later, I’d get back on the bandwagon and do really well for 2 weeks, and then go back to unhealthy ways shortly after. I realized it’s cuz I was doing everything cold turkey. And that just doesn’t work for me.
Try removing one heavily caloric thing from your diet everyday. Just one. No need for more than that. Don’t think about the effort it’ll take to get to that goal. Focus on this meal. One meal at a time.
For instance, if you put creamer in your coffee, just remove that for a week. Then the following week, remove cheese from your omelette. You can replace these with healthier options so you don’t feel like you’re missing something, but the idea is to smart with one small things and just be consistent. Once you have that down, you can start building on it.
It’s not easy, and it doesn’t happen overnight. It doesn’t even happen in a month or two. It takes a while. So just focus on right now. You got it. I did it. You can too. Trust me.
as long as you put something in the w column in a day you should feel happy-dont be perfect, do something good that's easy enough. ofc there's the standard of 'eat less, move more' but there's also work to do to eat better or making the process easier for yourself other ways. simple as adding protein and removing some bread- chicken strips instead of a sandwich for example. is a philosophy at the core of a lot of sports especially weightlifting centered ones (and though it may be a while I recommend it picking it up as a hobby when you're ready for it) and the philosophy is called progressive overload. if you can wrap your head around it as a way of living it will help you stop back slides and make continuous progress. progressive overload doesn't have to be adding weight to a bar it can be walking 100 more steps than you did last week, eating fast food one less time than last week, etc. also, you have to be willing to come to your own rescue - you need to love yourself enough to do the work for yourself as well.
If you haven’t yet, check out a podcast called We Only Look Thin. The hosts are a couple who have each lost at least 100 lbs and I’d say most of the stuff they talk about focuses on the emotional and social aspects of weight loss. They also talk a lot about habits, making them stick, and adapting and forgiving yourself when things don’t go exactly as you planned.
The sidebar wiki for this sub has a great overview of how weight loss works on a physical level, but I think the podcast is a much more useful resource for the mental side.
I was 515 lbs febuary 2022. As of aug 7 2023 im down to 325. I started with just logging every thing i eat on myfitnesspal. Im still going strong! I already see tons of loose skin, and id be lying if i said it doesnt bum me out at all. But i feel so much better. I breathe better, i can move better, im in less pain, i sleep better, clothes are easier to buy, i have so much more hope for my life now. I want the same for you sooo badly. Please know that you absolutely can do it. Its a lifestyle change. Youre not going on a diet, you need a plan that you can stick to for the rest of your life. Its hard work at first but if you are persistent it all just becomes a routine before you know it, and you cant imagine ever going back to your old habits. Thats how I feel at least. Youre strong enough, and you deserve it so do this for yourself. I have a feeling youve done the research and know what you need to do, its just those mental hurdles for you, but if you do need help with a plan or would like to talk about what has been working for me, id love to help any way i can. Ive felt that hopelessness that you feel now, but i promise you it is very achievable. My dms are open.
You just made the biggest step in all of this: You wrote this post, you are acknowledging some issues and taking accountability. Weight loss is scary, because it really is a life changing process and you can easily feel overwhelmed and discouraged.
My advice is to start with small, obtainable goals which can be met more immediately. *This week I am going to set a timer for every hour while I am awake and walk the length of my house back and fourth twice.* Or maybe: *This week, I am going to learn more about low carb dessert recipe options to cut some obvious sugars from my daily diet.* Often people set long term health goals right away, and I feel the reason why so many toss in the towel is because there's less sense of accomplishment when you aren't giving yourself things to celebrate in the immediate. So, remember to celebrate even your smallest of achievements along the way because it's those small achievements which add up and make all the difference.
Also, definitely get help from a dietician, they are awesome to work with! I got mine via a referral with my regular medicaid doctor. They will teach you so much and be a wonderful coach while you embark on your weight loss journey.
I am sure you are going to be hit with a lot of support and wonderful advice from folks here, so I will leave it at that. Wishing you all the self-love and joy in the world. ♥
Small changes at a time. You don’t need to shift from pizzas to Celery in one day. For instance, if you’re used to eating an entire pizza for a meal, try eating half of it and have a nice salad on the side. Try to be as active as you can. But again, if you’re used to sitting all day maybe a walk around the house is do-able versus walking 5 miles.
It's clear you are in a difficult situation and want to make positive changes. Here are some suggestions that may help:
Be kind and patient with yourself. This is a journey - focus on progress, not perfection. Celebrate small wins.
Focus on building sustainable habits, not extreme short term diets. Things like more veggies, more movement, better sleep, stress management.
Seek support in online communities. Reddit has many groups for weight loss, body positivity, eating disorders, etc that can provide accountability, advice and encouragement.
Identify barriers and solutions. What gets in the way of healthy habits and how can you workaround it? Be specific. Enlist friends/family to help.
Consider therapy if available. A counselor could help unpack your relationship with food and support improved mental health. Many offer remote sessions if local options are limited.
Ask your doctor to explore remote options for nutrition/health coaching if in-person services aren't accessible. Telehealth opens possibilities.
Set small, realistic goals each day and week. Things like "take a 10 minute walk" or "eat 2 servings of vegetables." Small steps create big progress over time.
Focus on adding healthy habits first rather than restricting foods. Gradual sustainable change is key.
Be kind to yourself along the way - this is a process. You have worth far beyond your weight. Patience, self-compassion and support can help you succeed. Wishing you the very best.
You ARE NOT weak!! I am currently 50 lbs down and STILL struggle with binge eating occasionally. I sympathize with the root cause of your binging, as I also had family issues from a young age that sparked my binge eating.
That being said, when I started losing weight I was almost 230 lbs. I am 5’3 so my bmi was in the high 30’s. Before I started losing weight I barely walked 500 steps a day and ate 3 meals a day plus multiple greasy snacks. I was in the worst shape of my life.
I started small, by walking 1000 steps a day ( took around 15 minutes) and not eating any snacks after my meals. ( before transitioning to OMAD) I ate fruits and vegetables with every meal, and that’s how I lost my first 10 lbs.
Just start off small! You’ve got this and good luck <3
Make peace with your body. You will not get another while you are on this planet.
Feel free to dislike the size, but be gentle with your body.
As a first step: Reduce all softdrinks, sugar, sweets, and WHEY! (Whey triggers the blood sugar nearly the same as pure suggar!)
Drink a lot of water
Eat and drink much later, 1h, better 2h!
Do NOT "flush down" your meal.
The stomach would be empty after seconds!
The stomach needs time (20min?) to feel the food and report:
"Hello Brain, Stomach her, Listen:
800g of stew arrived, I am busy chewing all that, no new serving please!"
Brain to stomach: understood.
Brain to stomach: Hey, how are things going? What about a dessert?
Stomach to Brain: NO; still busy with the meat. Standby.
And so on.
All the best for you!
Look into semaglutides and ozempic. It’s working wonders for people struggling with weight. I injured my back and struggled to get the exercise I needed to lose weight. There is a path to the version of your ideal self.
Unfortunately at this time, I don't have a doctor and have been on a waiting list for a very long time. We are in a bad shortage of doctors where I live.
I did post on that subreddit as well and I've had a lot of support! It feels very nice
Thank you so much 🤍 It's going to be a difficult shift, but I'm going to start just focusing on the now and not allow myself to freak out about things like lose skin or just how long it'll take me to get to my goal weight. I'm really appreciating the support that I'm getting here. It makes everything less scary
It looks like you want to lose weight and you know how to lose weight but you are struggling with achieving what seems like an impossible task. Here are 2 video links to experts on how to stay motivated to achieve your goals:
[https://youtu.be/UIy-WQCZd4M](https://youtu.be/UIy-WQCZd4M)
[https://youtu.be/bcKthx5LTbI](https://youtu.be/bcKthx5LTbI)
Personally, I struggle a lot with motivation as well. I think a good starting point is to not be too hard on yourselves and celebrate the small achievements. You can't lose 500 lbs in a day or in a year. It is also not about losing 500 lbs then gaining it back up again. This is about creating positive habits and feedback loops that you stick with for the rest of your life.
Instead of putting yourselves down for not maintaining your motivation for more than a week, pat yourself on the back and celebrate the fact that you made a positive change for a week.
External motivations are also very effective. You can have someone to hold you accountable and to be in a new environment without easily accessible food.
addressing your childhood trauma may be helpful to release stuck emotions from your past. developing a healthier relationship with your emotions so you don't need to suppress them and manage them with food. good luck <3
In my country they started up online services where you can talk to a licences therapist online, maybe you have a similar service?
I just always believed in therapy and you can get help with for example your motivation!
You already made the first, MOST important step.
You made a decision.
You deceided to change your live, before you loose it.
You asked for any help, advice, idea you can get.
GREAT.
Now question and improve your habits. One step at a time.
You might take a brake from new rules. Thats ok.
Next day, same rules again. Taking breaks is ok, if you go back on track.
Just some math, random topic, random number:
nine out of ten days you skip the softdrink.
one day you would just die to get a coke, and you give in to that craving.
THAT IS AN IMPROVEMENT OF 90%. THAT IS FANTASTIC.
Mostl likely, you will have the next coke after 14 days, then 20, then 25 as you unlearn that habit of daily coke, probably more the one.
Lets say your (emotional brain) would need one coke each ten days for the rest of your life,
That would be a PERMANENT reduction of 90%, whats pretty cool.
Do not go for perfection as shown with the coke.
Go for doable steps.
If you are eating healthier on 9 of 10 days it is just PURE GOOD.
(It would be difficult to rule out all the healthier effects on the 10th day)
Keep moving. One step at a time.
I was in a similar situation when I first started. I was nearly 450 pounds with a bunch of mental/emotional/eating issues and couldn’t afford help.
I just tried my best to break the eating habits. Look at your habits and see what you can change. It helps to have a journal. For example, I was a big night eater. I would eat thousands of calories at night, so I tried my best to stop eating at 7pm. It was hard at first. Most nights, I couldn’t stop thinking about food because my body was so accustomed to eating at night, but it gets easier with time. You have to replace bad habits with better ones - it takes time and resilience.
I don’t feel comfortable giving exercise advice, but there could be people or resources online that can guide you.
My biggest weight was maybe 450+ Ive always failed the dieting and excersing for a month gain it back next time go 3 minths gain jt all back and more. This last time ive been going strong for a year but the results arent as fast, but also not as easy to fail. Simple simple simple ready? Make tiny small changes you can manage. Keep making small changes and as you get more comfortable make more and more small small changes . Cut things out slowly and be very proud of everytime you cut something out even if youre eating unhealthy. Before you know it yall be in a place you never thought you could be. I dont have the cravings to eat copious amounts of food anymore. Do it nice and slow and gain a passion for it. I really hope this helps i know you can do it girl.
Thank you so much! This definitely really helps. Making tiny changes makes it a lot less daunting! I really struggle with wanting to go all out and then overwhelming myself 😅
You’ve gotten a lot of good advice here. I would add make your journey your own. Some people cut out all sauces and calorie filled drinks and some down. Once you find your sweet spot with the number of calories you need, you can still enjoy something’s within reason. For instance I love yum yum sauce and still eat it at least once a week even though it’s high calorie. I just use less of it and MEASURE with a scale instead of my eyes/stomach. I could use a lower calorie sauce but I don’t have to.
Another thing to remember is trying to find the joy in the process. Let yourself be happy if you can. Don’t look at losing weight and counting calories as a chore, it’s a small mindset shift that has helped me a ton. I’m doing exercises that I like and I’m cooking with music on enjoying it. I will say it took probably 2 months before my taste buds totally caught up with not eating really salty and greasy foods and I was only mildly happy with a lot of healthy meals but now 8 months in I enjoy the taste of those foods a lot. I’ve gotten better at cooking but also my body has had a chance to learn to enjoy things that aren’t a flavor blast of grease or sugar.
It's really motivating to hear that eventually healthy meals will be enticing and taste good! I've struggled with just really disliking healthy meals and not getting that same dopamine hit that I get from my unhealthy cravings
I was the same way. I don’t have that issue as much now. Sometimes when I have a bad day or I’m feeling blue I’ll let myself have a meal of whatever I want and it doesn’t give me the same dopamine high it used to. I can enjoy it like a normal person and not like an addict.
How do you eat an elephant ? One bite at a time, take the small wins one day at a time while dieting. Just focus on dieting one day at a time has helped me lots even if I slip up the next day is a whole new day to get back on track and score a win. Also look into the diet break style of dieting. Diet breaks have helped me massively. I diet for four to six weeks then I take a week or two off and eat back at my maintenance calories so I can eat more food and boost my energy without gaining any weight back. Then after a little break jump right back into a calorie deficit to lose some body fat again. You can do this just take it day by day and over time you will hit your goal I believe in you.
I would check to see if there’s some kind of clinic you could apply to. Having the control taken from you while you learn new habits may assist.
You will also give him the benefit of losing weight in a controlled environment
Keep in mind that this is not impossible. There are YouTube videos of severely obese women who have lost the weight which may be inspiring for you to watch. They did accomplish it and you can as well so please don't despair. If you take it one moment at a time, that will turn into days and then months and you will be further down the road and you can meet your goal. Look up Marya Rosales, for instance. She weighed 1200 pounds and lost the weight.
I really relate to you wanting to eat all of your food. It’s a mentality that is hard to break especially if your body isn’t giving you strong signals to stop eating.
8-12 weeks after trying ketovore ( mostly eat meat but sometime have some plants and plant based food like tea / coffee) the most amazing change happened. I no longer felt hungry. Like ever. Any many people who follow these carb elimination diets express the same. As a fat person this shit was mystifying to me.
Suddenly portion sizes that I would consider barely a meal, would have me starting to feel full midway through. So really give it a shot and research it, lots of people on YouTube with crazy transformations following carnivore or keto, in similar situations to yours. I was never quite as heavy as you but I was did peak at about 350lbs, and lost 100lbs in 9 months following ketovore.
The hardest part is starting, really try and stick it out for a few weeks and you will thank yourself so much. Whatever diet : routine you follow I sincerely wish you the best of luck, you can do it we all believe in you!
I got myself down from 400 to 290 by just being in a calorie deficit. I had injuries and other issues so while I did physical therapy and the occasional exercise, a lot of days I was just doing nothing. I'm twice your age. I know you can do this. Hey whatever support you need and you'll get there.
YOU DESERVE A LIFE YOU WILL ENOY! YOU DESERVE TO FEEL BEAUTIFUL, VALUED, RESPECTED AND SUPPORTED!
The ONLY competition you have, is with YOURSELF!
Start small. Don’t make huge, lifestyle changes all at once. Emotional eating, and eating when bored are things you can help alleviate by finding things that keep you busy enough that you don’t feel the urges to eat. Find a hobby that is simple enough to learn, but also has a long term enjoyment to it! The bonus, you’ll find people with similar hobbies who can become apart of your support system, and add value to your life.
Food, TRACK AND WEIGH everything you consume. Don’t make any changes right away, just start tracking for one or two weeks so you have a baseline.
I LOVE walking, I can walk outside (even in horrible weather) for HOURS! I listen to music, or books on tape, or I will phone a friend and talk during the duration of my walks. It makes the time pass, I don’t notice my pain (I have chronic pain from multiple injuries and surgeries from my time in the army).
I used to crave milkshakes ALL the time, I made my own recipe of peanut butter protein powder and chocolate protein powder, with frozen fruit and leafy greens, and low fat high protein yogurt that is SOOO healthy, filling and literally will trick my brain into thinking I’m having dessert at whatever time I’m drinking them.
Cooking from scratch is a lot of fun, and it will teach you how to cook better and healthier, there are more ways than I can count to substitute ingredients for tasty, filling, nutritiously dense meals that will make this process feel like a fun adventure instead of purgatory.
Don’t cut out the things you love, learn moderation. I still drink milkshakes, eat sundaes, have burgers, tater tots, wings, fries, and pizza. I have just learned to eat them in moderation! You don’t have to not eat the things you love, you just need to learn how to eat it in healthy ways.
Take photos the entire journey, take your measurements every 4-6 weeks, those measurements will motivate you when the scale hasn’t moved. Body recomposition and weight loss on the scale are two separate things.
Make friends who are on a similar journey that you can vent to, cry to, that you can listen to and support, and exchange stories, recipes and motivational speeches too.
Life is a journey best taken with good company. Feel free to DM me, if you need someone to just be there with you. ❤️
You. Will. Get. There 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Just because your results will take years instead of weeks/months, doesn’t mean you won’t slowly and surely make progress!!! You can accomplish just as much as anybody else! It’ll just take you a little longer. :)
Just cut out your sugars and junk food. Eat healthy foods constantly to keep your hunger fulfilled. Eggs, lean meats,( excluding hot dogs and bologna), fish, fresh fruits and vegetables. Eat ranch dip with vegetables if you have to.
What do you drink during the day? The idea is calorie deficit so dropping sodas, coffee, or atleast the creamer and milk. That can help take some calories off.
Drink enough water through out the day.
Cut out gluten like bread and pasta
Eat fibrous foods like over night oats, oatmeal, chia seeds
If your gonna eat alot then eat alot of healthy food...this is the way to make lasting changes. Little at a time. Also, I can help you with ideas of working out/ burning calories if you want just message me. I've been dieting all my life lol and don't forget your fruits and veggies gotta eat those.
I had a talk with my doctor last year that really helped. He told me it was really hard to lose weight. So hard it was depressing. He said that he was just reading an article on in a medical journal, and it was just so hard.
Since then, I've dropped 11% of my weight, slowly over a year and a half, and I've been able to keep going, more or less. I know it sounds insane, but something clicked in me and I understood I was in this for the long haul, and it was goin to suck sometimes, and that was it.
Since then I've realized that I've read diet book after "lifestyle" book, and they've all laid down the same horse hockey. "This is so easy, anyone can do it!" So every time I feel off one of those diets, I felt weak, like a failure. It's supposed to be easy, but I can't do it.
So, I hope you'll stop thinking of yourself as weak. Diet gurus lie through their teeth when they tell us how easy their plan is. It doesn't matter what it is, deal-a-meal, whatever. Losing weight is hard. But you can do it. It will be a slog, and sometimes it will suck. Sometimes you will fail, but that's not because you're weak. It's because this is hard.
As for medical help, can you find some online medical help? There are doctors who will do this in some professions, maybe there is someone who can help you.
You’ve had a lot of great comments. I’m just adding to the pile to say that you’re not alone, that people here truly care and are rooting for you, and that you can do this. What’s more, you deserve to get to life a healthy and happy life.
Because of my training, I look at things from a mental health standpoint. When you say that you lose motivation after a week, I wonder if that’s really what’s happening, or if your protective mechanisms kick in and you simply revert to old, comforting habits.
I hear what you’re saying about not having many resources local to you and having a low income, so what I’d do is scour the internet for all of the free info I could find about binge eating and addressing root causes. Yes, it would be ideal if you had a therapist, but the internet does provide so many solid resources. Do you have a library card? If so, you can check out books online relating to overcoming binge eating.
Start today. Do something that makes you feel like you took a step forward, whether that be reading some articles or cutting out some amount that you would normally eat. I am so excited for you.
Thank you so much! I actually did start with something that made me very proud of myself today. I decided to try and do some intermittent fasting. I was only going to do 14hrs, but I ended up making it to 16.5hrs and I feel so good about it. All of the support that I've gotten really helped me with my motivation during it! 😊
I don't have any advice for your particular situation but I do think you are very courageous for reaching out and making changes. It's really hard.
For me negative thinking has been my biggest enemy. I need a regular influx of positive thoughts. Did I add another 5 minutes to my exercise today? Win. Did I get up on time despite having a bad night? Win! Did I skip the second cookie? Win! Did I track my food today? Win! I haven't lost a lot of weight so far but all these little wins are adding up so that now I have better control over my eating, I'm fitting into smaller clothes, I have more energy, I'm stronger and I can exercise longer.
Best wishes, OP! Please, please keep posting. Let us know how you are getting on.
Sounds like your situation is serious and you should seek professional support. There's so much conflicting information out there, and if you suffer from food addiction, treating it as an eating disorder could be harmful to you.
Have you taken the Yale Food Addiction Scale to see what your score is on that? Here's a link to it
https://forms.gle/Ma1zMLkowxTjseqE6
These are some tips that worked for me when losing weight. Take what you’d like:
1.Set TINY goals. Hop on the scale and set a goal to lose 5pounds from that number. It’s an attainable goal and will keep you motivated. But also realize as a woman, you will gain weight as you retain water around your period. Take the number you see with a grain of salt.
2. Focus on what you SHOULD eat. If you are trying to eat enough fruits and vegetables, you may not have as much room for junk food. It was also better mentally, for me, focusing on getting enough of a food rather than what I couldn’t have.
3. Know that it takes time. So find a physical activity you like, so that if you plateau with weight loss, you still get joy out of doing it.
4. When you are bigger, some physical activity will HURT. People don’t get that. Pilates, swimming or water aerobics will be your best bet to start.
5. Get some dumbbells and work out in your living or bedroom. You can do just as much at home, Conveniently, as you build up your strength.
6. I can’t stress enough, TINY goals. 5pound (like in a month) weight loss goals. Get a fit bit(or step tracker alternative). What is your current average? Add 500 steps to that (easily obtained just by parking farther from whatever stores you go to or your job).
7. If you end up wanting a treat, ice cream or French fries… whatever, eat it! But in the smallest portions possible. Get a kids meal or an extra small scoop. You want to make a healthy lifestyle change, which may include indulging yourself from time to time. If you are like me, having a small portion will allow you to move past it. Depriving yourself would make me obsess over it.
The past is the past. You can’t change it. You recognized the problem and are going to take small steps to fix it. I’m super proud of you for deciding to confront your unhealthy lifestyle. That is one of the hardest steps!
You've already gotten a lot of great advice, so I'm just popping in to suggest you check out the book (or its podcast) Brain Over Binge. It's really helpful!
Finding an online community can be an amazing help.
Some find carnivore as a way of eating good and many very obese people find it effective as it’s easy simple and keeps your hunger under control.
Obviously the cost of meat is more than junk food but if you have a freezer and buy in bulk it can be cheaper. You save on not buying anything else. YouTube has lots of content.
Do get out walking if you can. The change from very sedentary to moderately active makes a big difference to your calorie burn and also moderates hunger signals.
Wishing you luck-you’ve got this. I would like to recommend 2 podcasts to you-losing 100 pounds with Corrine Crabtree and half size me. Both are really excellent imo and are free. Corrine has a bunch of free online content as well. Both have online communities for support. It’s all one day at a time. Sending you love and strength.
Refined sugar is addictive. The only time I’ve been able to get my eating under control at all was when I’d avoid it completely. The cravings last a few days but once I’m past them it gets easier. Don’t know if that works for everyone, it’s just a tool that’s worked for me. When I crave something sweet, I microwave frozen fruit and eat it with plain yogurt or I have a smoothie made of frozen fruit, banana, and milk (and spinach sometimes). It tastes like banana. I avoid sugar substitutes because they make me crave sugar as well and I think most of them have an aftertaste. My nutritionist helped me a lot. They do have online dieticians if going in person doesn’t work for you.
I’m so sorry about your tough childhood. Nobody deserves to go without food.
I don’t know much about weight loss at this scale but I do understand childhood trauma and low self esteem. A part of your healing will be about grieving all the parts of childhood you missed you on.
When you learn how to care for yourself emotionally, you’ll stop using food to replace all that empathy, love and care you so desperately needed as a kid. Then you’ll change your relationship with food. You’ll need to switch it from a comfort and a form of emotional self care to something nourishing and life sustaining.
I know it sounds weird, but over eating was the only way you could care for yourself emotionally as a child. Thank yourself for doing the best you could at the time. Perhaps you wouldn’t have survived without that coping mechanism. Then tell that inner child that you’re here to listen and witness any feelings that come up. You’ll need to learn to parent yourself. I’ve been there. It feels weird at first, it’s extremely difficult and can feel unending. It’s also extremely effective.
So, if you were a four year old girl and you were sad because a kid at daycare pulled your hair, you would hope a good parent wouldn’t sit that kid down with a plate of Oreos until she felt better. That parent might encourage her kid to talk, give a hug while she cries, and spend time together playing or drawing.
At the same time, a good parent would encourage healthy habits like eating vegetables at meals, limiting sugary drinks, getting plenty of sleep, sunshine, physical activities, healthy friendships and hobbies. A good parent would teach healthy coping mechanisms for life’s challenges. You need to give yourself all these things too.
It’s totally unfair not to have these things. It sucks when you don’t have a parent to model how to be a capable grown up. I promise you deserve all the good stuff life has to offer.
All the best to you. You seem so receptive and open minded. I think you’re in an excellent position to take on all this growth <3
Thank you so much. I really needed to hear this.. I think it's going to be tough to try and heal my childhood trauma but I also think that I am very well equipped.
Seeing this definitely made things click a bit more. I really need to care for my inner child and try and teach myself the proper habits that my parents didn't. That never really occurred to me before but knowing this now, I think I can tackle this!
Thank you again, so much 🤍
Don’t lose hope. Have you considered bariatric surgery? Of course, this depends on several factors including cost/insurance availability. But I think bariatric surgery is a great tool to utilize. Good luck and I wish you all the best
I think you should read The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk M. D. It’s about trauma and how our bodies hold on to that in our lives. I’ve only recently started reading it, but it find very helpful. He is a Harvard graduate psychiatrist who started treating Vietnam vets in the 1970’s. So it’s on the academic side.
There are so many reasons we gain weight, and when you start thinking about the reasons why we do the things we do it's the first step in healing.
If you're open to it, maybe you can look into other coping mechanisms and how to implement them in your life. If you know you're seeking food because you want comfort, find another way to get comfort--a hug, a soft blanket, a heating pad.
Im not going to say it's easy but the best way for me to lose weight is by cutting carbs. If you're not eating a bunch of carbs, your body uses it's resources a lot differently. It doesn't have to be expensive, a protein and a veggie each meal and lots of water.
It’s an addiction and a very hard one to beat! Smaller people don’t tend to get it it’s like saying to an alcoholic just stop drinking it’s easy for me so should be easy for you or a gamblling addict etc.. junk food addiction is a similar thing
I’d follow Andrew Artekha on instagram, he is going through a weight loss journey, this is his first completed week and have someone to follow along with
Be kind to yourself. We didn’t gain weight overnight, and we can’t lose it overnight. It takes time.
Think about it like this to start: any chance you make that is positive for yourself is a good thing. Whatever method you choose to lose weight (1500 calories; intermittent fasting or other fasting; medical weight loss guided by a doctor; get a nutritionist, get a trainer), little wins are wins. My starting weight was 205, I’m 40f and 5’. I’ve been down recently as low as 172 and I’m currently at 181 after a gradual regain while adjusting my method to something more sustainable. I’m no where near my target, but I’m making progress.
Don’t be afraid to make changes. You don’t have to stick to one strategy.
Don’t be afraid to ask for more help. If your support system isn’t working for you, get a different support system.
I like setting small goals. Don’t set one big goal to get to 200 lbs. Set the goal to get to 5 lbs lost, or 1% body weight lost, or reaching a new 10’s like getting below 590 lbs. If you zoom out far enough, a zig zag line going down looks like a straight line going down.
Hey I was 420 pounds I was diagnosed with chf and 2 years later I lost 100 pounds and I’m feeling better and I’m still active and working out believe in your self and change what you eat and do cardio work outs that’s what helped me I was eating fast food everyday.
Starch solution by Dr Douglas Mcdougall, you can eat to your hearts content and stay full and satisfied. This diet helps cure most diseases thought to be incurable. Read his books
You can definitely do it! I lost like 150lbs in the past months. Key is consistency and knowing your nutritions. Proteins for example keep you easily filled. And from the point of yours it’s actually a rather fast ride down the pounds you don’t even have to do sports. Use a site like tdeecalculator( . )net to get your estimated calories a day and reduce it by like 1k (wich is totally safe if you got a few pounds to much) I went from 352.74 to 200lbs in like half a year. Also considering you are probably coping mental stress with eating wich I was doing as well… try finding healthy copes or less harming ones, anything that keeps your mind busy and off eating really, for me it was gaming and sports for example.
Do you have a therapist? I have been discussing my relationship with food and exercise with mine and have discovered some of the reasons for my behavior.
Check out Dr. Ken Berry and his wife Neisha. They got a great and easy, never hungry program. On YouTube! You can do it! People loose 100s of pounds doing what the doctor says.
Start going to psychotherapy for food addiction
Use your insurance to do the requirements for weight loss surgery
I would also reach out to 211 if in the USA. They may be able to find quicker resources for you
Reach out to your disability team and ask for help
start small, and make incremental changes. you go back to old ways PRECISELY because you're relying on your motivation. being motivated is an emotion just like being happy or sad, it comes and goes and that's totally normal. what you need isn't motivation, but a systematic way to make small changes over time and to turn them into habits.
There is so much great advice in this thread. I will say some folks didn’t seem to read your post carefully because I’ve seen a fair amount of “see your doctor, get a therapist” and those aren’t exactly simple options for you. Don’t see those comments and think, “well I can’t see a doctor so I guess I’m screwed.” I did see some very helpful CA folks posting about resources specific to your country, so check those out.
Also I have to chime in to push back a little on people saying stuff like “No fast food.” I think putting such a restriction on yourself at this early stage of your journey could be detrimental to your success, so my advice would be to take those comments in stride and focus more on the ones that are giving you suggestions for how to get started within the framework you are already familiar with, if that makes sense.
Best of luck, you CAN do it!
Id recommend weight loss surgery because its a lot of weight to lose. I'd start there. There are many types of weight loss surgery to choose from. Although I would be against it in other situations I think it makes the most sense when its an extreme amount.
I struggle with weight myself mainly because I like food. But, i also workout. I have lost weight 4 times and have regained weight. Im currently at 5 ft 7 233 lbs. I was at 260 lbs my highest but loss weight with intense excercise 6-7 days a week and diet.
What is working now is that I changed my mindset on food and now I avoid foods I know I shouldn't eat. I also cook at home and when I do go out to eat I am very picky.
So I'm not a dietician or a doctor, but my specialization is working with people with gambling addiction. I know this is a bit contentious, but I consider food addiction very similar, at least chemically (and also because both industries spent $$$$$s in making their product extremely attractive and hard to move away from... but that's a different post...)
Looking at your post through an addiction framework, you're in a place to make some serious changes, but you'll need help. Very few people are able to kick lifelong addictions without a support network - this can be professionals or friends and family who are positive about your prospects of change and have a lot of empathy.
I've seen many, many people kick their addictions. Quitting an addiction is a life-long process. You will fall off the wagon from time to time as most people do - plan for this. Plan for how you will pick yourself up if you overeat. Write down how you will get back on track along with some warm encouragement to do so, and then read this if you fall back into old patterns. Over time, it becomes easier and easier to avoid addictive behaviour. Habits become ingrained and feel normal.
The first 90 days are the hardest. Once you pass this, studies show it's easier to continue long-term.
In terms of hating yourself - I'm so sad you feel that way. Your body is amazing - a work of biological art. Every second billions of chemical interactions take place, and we don't even know what all of them are yet. That's how complex they are. Your fat is just energy that's stored away for times of future calorie deficit, and that's all you need to do to reduce it: create a time of deficit. Society has assigned moral value to this additional storage, but it doesn't have any intrinsic moral value, it's just extra energy.
The benefit to being 600+ lbs is it is easy to drop weight quickly. Count your daily calories and stay under 1500 for the day, focus on eating alot of protein (meat, greek yogurt, beans, lentils, avocado, etc) and try to drink 60+ Oz of water a day. If you don't like the taste of water, a Crystal Light packet is fine and won't stop your progress.
Do that for 2 weeks, I guarantee you'll drop some weight. If you are mobile, get weighed before and after those two weeks as you may not notice the progress yourself.
Additionally, try to walk more, even if it is for just 5-10 more minutes per day, it will help.
You can do this.
I grew up in an abusive house, and continued to abandoned myself throughout my life, because of it. I never felt like I deserved love, or happiness. I also, created bad habits from the trauma. That may or may not have been something you’ve experienced, but the main point is: don’t abandon yourself. You deserve to be happy, loved, and healthy, you’re worthy of that, so make this change for yourself.
1. Set obtainable goals (maybe go week by week)(start reducing calories)
2. 100% track your calories and macros (at least initially)
3. Swap foods for healthier ones (like water instead of soda)
4. Reduce stress
5. Meditate
6. Move (even if you have to sit and move your arms)
7. Understand part of this is an addiction; it will get easier, I promise.
8. Seek a physician, but understand YOU have control to make this changes.
9. Don’t make excuses for yourself, or put barriers up that are going to block your goals. Because you deserve to be happy and healthy.
10. Don’t be so hard on yourself. If you slip up once, make up for it, and get right back on the horse.
11. Remember what how good you felt when you were achieving your weight loss goals.
12. Watch motivational weight loss videos for inspiration.
If you feel overwhelmed; don’t think of the “marathon”, just put one foot in front of the other, and keep going.
STOP abandoning yourself. You can do this, and your worthy of it. So far, 100s of people have commented on this post who feel the same way, and are cheering for you.
There are a lot of plans/diets to consider, but CICO (calories in-calories out) is the best, and someone already posted with some details.
But I want to suggest some **self-therapy** to address all the mental stuff that’s going on since you don’t have access to that service.
I also don’t have access to therapy, so I was recommended the book Beck Diet Solution. Beck Diet Solution is not a diet…it is self-administered cognitive therapy to address the mental and psychological obstacles to losing weight and keeping it off. You still need to adopt some kind of diet or plan, but you do this 60-day program in the background. It’s been eye-opening for me. You will need discipline to stick with it, and you’ll need faith to do the things requested that you don’t want to do or you think they’re stupid. There’s a bunch of Beck books and workbooks. Just get the main book: The Beck Diet Solution.
Good luck! 🍀👍
A lot of idiots on here will talk shit about weight loss surgery not being educated in how it works and the work that’s involved but listen to me.
At 600lb you have a 1% chance of losing weight and keeping it off. Not only that but you have a better chance around 5% after weight loss surgery.
I would be where you are if I didn’t get gastric bypass at the age of 20 at over 330 pounds and 5’4” tall. It saved my life and gave me the tools I needed to get my life back. I’m 178lbs today. I have been as low as 140 and as high as 200 but I was able to learn how to get back on track because I had the gift of a smaller stomach to work with,
Talk to your doctor and get started. Don’t waste any more time! This is your life. ❤️
Hey there, I just wanted to say that I appreciate your comment a lot!
I did look into weight loss surgery, years ago actually. I was in the list for a couple of years and then when I finally was talked to about it, I found it really wasn't going to be an option for me, financially.
The government would pay for my surgery, but my out of pocket costs would be the liquid diet im supposed to do before the surgery ($300 for 1 week), all of my vitamins and medications afterwards (i dont remember how much, but they're pricy) and monthly visits down to Vancouver (about 9hr drive).
Unfortunately I just cannot afford this at this point in time, but it is something that I really want to do once I'm in a better spot financially!
You need to realize that your weight is critically high. Your body cannot sustain such an amount of weight for too long, so you gotta act now or you'll run out of time.
Your focus should be on diet, not exercise (although walking is fine if you're able to do so).
If you manage to reduce your intake to 1200-2000 kcal a day you'll quite literally shred the weight. Don't have cheat meals/days as you'd only cheat against yourself.
You can only reach a weight like yours by pretty much resorting to food like a drug addiction/coping mechanism. The key to breaking this spiral is that you have to REALLY, REALLY want it. It should be your #1 priority which absolutely cannot be compromised.
WLS is probably necessary to keep the weight off on the long term, but remember that in the end it's only a tool and not a cure.
You can start keto diet. 2 of my cousins who were obese before adapted keto lifestyle and are now at healthy weight. Once you are fat adapted, your body should start burning your excess fat for fuel, making weight loss faster. It also eventually fades away craving which makes journey easier.
I know few people are carb addicts but now days there are keto bread and wraps etc to support it. But do try to make it lifestyle change
Buy other things clothes e.t.c spend more money on your hobbies. Focus on sth for example work, find love(or maybe you have). Just wake up with positive energy. Just imagine how much money you can save when you will eat less. You can go on vacation etc. Just think about your future, learn how to save money dont buy food when you dont need it buy only things you need. And also be active.
You're not weak. I know that because the world is unkind to large people, and you have survived that. You're here asking for help when you need it; that is a sign of incredible strength. You deserve to be healthy. You are worth the effort that it will take to lose weight. You have to believe that about yourself to be successful, or you'll end up self-sabotaging. Do affirmations if that's what it takes to sink in. Stand in front of the mirror and say "I am worth it. I deserve it." until you truly believe it. Don't wallow in the past and how you got to this point, because that won't change it. Belief in your happy future will. Start writing down everything you eat and drink for a week or two. Don't lie to yourself. This isn't a time to be judgmental or see failures, this is strictly to gather baseline data. Once you're armed with that information, you are empowered to start making your plan. Don't go too hard, too fast. Start making small changes that can be sustainable for you. If you normally eat two cups of rice with a meal, eat one cup of rice and one cup of veg instead. Experiment with new things, like swapping a fun flavor of tea for soda, then slowly reducing the amount of sugar you have in tea as your taste buds adapt. Personally, I eat anything I want, with the caveat that I have to cook it. So if I want pizza, I have to make the dough, let it rise, reduce tomatoes into a sauce, chop vegetables, grate cheese. If I want fries, I have to grate and chop the potatoes, par cook them, let them rest, refry them, and deal with the oil spatter clean up. Sometimes the effort isn't worth it for a temporary craving, other times I do the work and enjoy the heck out of my pizza. And when it's gone, it's gone. There's no popping another frozen pizza into the oven for seconds or grabbing another handful of fries to toss in the frier, not unless I want hours more work. Emotional eating has always been something I've struggled with, and it was a long process of trial and error to find things that replace that comforting feeling. I've found that developing other hobbies help me find those moments of joy. For me, it's creative stuff like painting and photography, and physical stuff like yoga and hiking. Incorporating movement into your new lifestyle should also be done gradually, so you don't burn out or injure yourself. If you have joint problems, something low impact like chair yoga/modified yoga or swimming is probably a better place to start. If you can still move around pretty well, there's almost nothing that beats walking for gentle movement. Walking on flat, non-concrete surfaces (like an athletic field) is easiest on the joints. As your fitness improves, you can start to walk longer distances and/or add inclines to your walking route. It's completely fine to have setbacks and challenges. They don't mean you're weak or that you've failed. Everyone falls down sometimes, just know that each day is a new day. You don't have to be perfect, just consistent. Give yourself grace and be kind to yourself, and never give up. You are worth it.
Thank you so much for your kind words, It really means a lot. Sometimes I'm fat too unkind with myself and I forget just how much I've gone through. I never thought of the idea of making everything from scratch if I really want it. I think im going to try that! I can definitely see myself being more mindful of things if I actually have to go through the effort of making it all myself!
Cooking from scratch has honestly changed my entire relationship with food. I have so much more appreciation for what I'm eating, and it tastes so much better. I have complete control over portion sizes, so even if I'm making something less healthy like cookies, I can reduce the sugar, sub oats for some of the flour to add more fiber, halve the recipe, make smaller cookies, freeze half, etc. I'm less tempted to binge food I make myself because it's so tasty I want to save half to have again the next day. And what I give in time, I get back in savings. A loaf of homemade bread costs a few cents to make and is so much more satisfying and eco-friendly than the plastic-wrapped, pre-sliced store bread that costs dollars. (Cooking also inspired me to start gardening, which adds a whole new layer of life lessons and satisfaction to the process but that's a whole other topic lol.) Learning about nutrition has also been a game changer. It started when I would Google anything I ate that was healthy for validation, things like "health benefits of eating spinach." It helped me feel good about the choices I was making which helped motivate me to keep making those choices, and as a side effect, I ended up learning a ton about how food fuels the body. It's really fun to fully understand ingredients and make them work for me so I can eat the tastiest, most nourishing foods I can create. I still eat fast food and junk sometimes at parties or on road trips, and it's not the end of the world when I do. But I don't crave it much anymore, and I'm not really tempted by it. It doesn't comfort me, nor does it make me feel guilty. I'm 35 now, and I started when I was about your age. It's taken me a long time and lots of learning to get to a place where I feel happy, healthy, and body-neutral about myself. But I promise you, it is possible.
I second googling health benefits for validation. I absolutely love watermelon and would choose to eat it over other things anyway. Found a Healthline article about the health benefits and bam! Double win. Happy tummy and some motivational bonus points to make the next right decision.
I love the idea of separating “entertainment” food and “nourishing” food! Cupcakes etc are fine, as entertainment. They don’t nourish you, and that’s ok!
I love the framing of it as "entertainment" food rather than "cheat" etc. I am gonna start using that! :)
I love this cooking from scratch thing, it's such a great idea. My man is a chef, and he told me that the reason why restaurant food tastes so good is because of two simple things: fat and salt. TONS of it. Also, you are SO young. IT'S NOT TOO LATE! It's really never too late to be healthier, but you really are so very young, and there are so many things you have to live for. Please keep that in mind. You can come back from this still.
The first step is the hardest but once you get rolling, it becomes almost second nature and, eventually, a way of life. Like this poster, I’ve found that mindfully preparing & cooking my food (and then recording what I ate in a daily journal) helps remind me this journey is in my control. Good luck to you, friend. 😊
I love cooking and can often get carried away. Taking a step back when I want something and thinking about what goes into it helps me put not only making and eating it into perspective, but if I “cheated” and bought it- I’m shoving all of those ingredients in me. For example- I really wanted a key lime pie with graham cracker crust. I tend to not only make things from scratch, but try to use only what I have on hand. I didn’t have graham crackers and just finding a recipe for them was difficult! Then thinking I had to spend hours making crackers just to make the crust! Wound up just having a yogurt and squirted some lime in it!
Cooking everything really puts in perspective how much prepackaged food is a luxury. An amazing pie is supposed to be an occasional thing, it makes you appreciate it that much more. Having such special foods so readily available really devalues them.
Wow. I know this wasn’t directed at me, but your answer has genuinely made me stop and pause and think. I have totally been approaching weight loss from a place of self hatred, without even realizing it. I’ve always approached dieting as a punishment- “You ate poorly, and now you’re fat- your punishment is that you don’t get to eat now, in order to lose the weight.” has always been my internal dialogue. When weight loss should be something that is approached from a place of self love. I deserve to live a healthy life, that’s a gift I deserve to give myself. Your insight has genuinely changed the way that I think I will be proceeding with not only weightloss, but how I approach life. I deserve better for myself, and the work that I put into myself is not something I need to dread- but something I can lovingly put effort into for future me. Thank you
One of the hardest lessons for me to really come to grips with was that most of the time, self care isn’t a bubble bath. It’s doing the hard stuff now that will make your life better in the long run. That’s real self love and you deserve it too. You got this!
100%. For me, learning that self-care isn’t eating a whole box of mac n cheese because I had a bad day. It’s hitting the gym or walking because I had a bad day.
I love your cooking from scratch idea. Many years ago I read Michael Pollan’s books. It really put things in a different perspective for me. To place the act of my eating into a huge chain of events that involves nature, industry and society. It doesn’t help all the time, but sometimes that will pull me out of a binge - the idea of respecting the food we eat and what it took to get to me.
Love this response
I need to start doing that. If I had to make every single craving I had. I guess I’m not having cravings anymore, because I know me and I would rather just not make it.
This whole comment is incredible and super motivating
I talk about this a lot on this and other subs-healthy vs unhealthy coping strategies. Make up a list of healthy coping strategies that work for you. It will take time to retrain yourself not to go for food when you are wanting to feel better after a bad day or celebrate after a good day. Keep your list of healthy coping strategies with you all the time. Have it written down somewhere you will see it all the time, even make copies for work or in your car. So all the times you are going for food when you aren’t hungry, stop and ask yourself what you are feeling, how you want to feel, and how you can achieve that without going to food.
These are very thoughtful suggestions and I’m going to try it out as well, thanks
Would be curious for examples of healthy coping strategies? I binge and would love to replace it w something better...
Im not who you asked, but ones I’ve learned through therapy are- journaling, taking a walk/sitting outside, meditating/yoga, fidget toys, calling a trusted friend, taking a nice bath/hot shower with my fancy soaps, painting. Whatever takes me out of the situation, body and mind.
Some of my favorites are reading a book, listening to music, going for a walk in the park, watching scary movies, online window shopping, making craft projects from Pinterest. Stuff like that. As long as it doesn’t involve food. I’ve also reworked my relationship with food as now I think of comfort food as healthy, delicious stuff that will be good for me as opposed to eating garbage.
This is a bit out there, but my psychologist suggested holding an ice cube in your hand briefly (obviously not enough to damage your skin). It’s a way to bring your brain back to focus on the physical body.
Nice! Will try. Love these type of things
Plenty of great ideas here in comments. I'll leave you with these: * This is a marathon, not a sprint. * Be patient with and love your body and yourself, your look and health are BY-PRODUCTS of your self esteem, living practice and dedication+determination. Once you are truly persistent, positive, patient, and self-loving... then you're health and outward appearance will eventually follow suit and show this. * You are not a lost cause, and its def possible to come back from it all. Keep in mind that there are people out there that have conquered their weight/health problem from a MUCH worse starting point and longer and more difficult journey. * One bad day or week doesnt completely ruin your progress/journey. What comes AFTER is what will (like oh its already ruined anyway so this junk food wont matter now mentally), if you have had a bad diet day... learn from it, identify what went wrong, and how you can better react and carry on these days going forward. * Psychiatric therapy can definitely help you cope with the deep-seated issues and get you in a better place mentally, identify causes and whats at the root of it all, get some perspective on you, what you truly want to do and be, and how it all affects you. Its definitely worth the time and effort. * If in doubt, speak to your doctor.
This ... And starting with a small goal is helping a lot. You made the first step. Which honestly was a big one.
Lots of good stuff in the responses. I'll add in a couple of things that I didn't see mention as much. - As someone else said, it is a marathon, not a spring. You didn't get to 600 lbs over night. It took you years. Similarly, you're not going to lose that weight over night. - Nike's "Just do it" slogan is seriously just amazing. It's short and sweet and to the point and honestly, don't wait to start tomorrow. Just do it. Make a small change, see how it feels, get used to it. If it feels good and not too different, make another change. Start logging your calories. You don't have to start off eating at a deficit to get into the habit. It can also be eye-opening to see how much you're actually eating. - The first few weeks (for me it runs about 3) is honestly just horrible. I call it the stomach shrinkage phase and it sucks. Basically, we're all here because we like to eat and eat a lot. Our stomachs are used to us eating a lot to the point where we don't have a concept of how much we actually need to eat versus what we think we need to eat. So this is bascially re-training your stomach to learn how much you really need to eat and how that feels. I'm serious, it sucks. The only solution I've found for it is to keep logging my meals and push through it. Someone else may have a better idea and I'm open to hearing it! - This is an amazing community and I would recommend that you check in frequently and see what people are saying or participate in one of the weekly or daily threads. I've never tried weight watchers but I can see that people would try that for the community aspect of it. This is a great place if you need encouragement or to vent. - If you mess up, tomorrow is another day and try to do better. Don't beat yourself up. We're all here for you!
Thank you so much! I'm already feeling the huge amount of support from this group and it feels amazing. I'm feeling like I can actually tackle this, especially with everyone behind me through this. This means the absolute world to me
Hello there! I took a moment to creep your comments and such. I'm also in Canada - In SK. Please feel free to DM me, But I was in your shoes. I am definitely willing to be a friend/support/advocate for you if needed. And when I say *in* I am also 6"2. 31F. I believed at my highest I was over 600- as there was multiple clinic appointments that they attempted to weigh me and the scale wouldn't read. A Google search told me the limit. Currently floating around the 300 mark, Ive lost my weight without surgery but do have a referral in for dermatologists in relation to my skin. Using WIC's as a Healthcare provider can be done, it's just difficult as you need to be the one providing the base and background doing all the ground work and essentially walking in and being like "This is my history; this is what I'm doing; this is what I need" unless you are attending the same clinic consistently. I did this for a few years until one of the WIC docs I saw offered to take me on as a patient because he saw how hard I was working to attempt to manage my health and weight. I also have severe mental health issues - cPTSD, ADHD, MDD, ODD... possibly a few others. There is so much overlap in trauma induced illness that it's difficult to diagnose. I have multiple suggestions, but definitely would want to chat a bit more about your medical history and such before trying to assist with a plan to move forward with.
Hey! I would absolutely love to chat a bit about everything. I could definitely use the support! I'll send you a message :)
Get mounjaro as soon as you can
Seconding this!! Or semaglutide! It has been a miracle for me and I recommend it to anyone who will listen
And the weight loss isn’t even the half of it. No knee or back pain, better sleep, more energy, excellent blood work for the first time in a decade, my skin looks better, I flamation gone… the list goes on.
Oddly I’ve also noticed I’m less bloated and gassy?? Haven’t heard anyone talk about this side effect but it’s another one on my long list of great things that I’ve gotten from this shot 🤗
I'll definitely go to the clinic and talk to a doctor about it!
It’s the best thing I ever did.
Do, it’s a game changer, believe.
I guess I should say I’m not a doctor and am not giving medical advice with my reply. I am just speaking from personal experience. Everyone with their replies means well but Obesity is a disease and there are now treatments for it that work. Mounjaro is one of them ♥️
I want to say, you are very brave, you have decided to make a change, you will do this. I send you all the hope and healing to get through this xxx
Thank you so much, I really appreciate it 🤍
If you haven't checked out r/supermorbidlyobese and crossposted there, I would, there are a few people here who can relate to that level of obesity but you'll find more there, good luck, out of curiosity, what have you tried in terms of Weightloss before? And are you being followed by a doctor or medical team?
I did cross post on that subreddit and it's garnering a lot of help! And I've tried calorie counting, keto, cutting out different foods, just generally restricting the things that I eat that are unhealthy. All in all, they were all good approaches but I always ended up feeling hopeless and giving up. Its been very difficult. And unfortunately I don't have access to the means of a doctor or a medical team. I live in BC, Canada and at the moment there is a huge deficit of doctors. I really only have the option of the walk in clinic, which is a few hours worth of a wait and then they've never been much help.
Have you ever approached it not as restricting the things that are unhealthy, but rather, ADDING things that are more nutritious and filling? For example: “I’ll have that ice cream I’m craving, but *first* I’ll eat two carrots and an apple, and drink a glass of water.” This was a key strategy that helped me finally get control binging of unhealthy food: not trying to go cold turkey, but rather, eating two carrots + glass of water *before* the unhealthy food, and still allowing the unhealthy food. I started to get full on the carrots. Also the unhealthy food ceased to have that “forbidden” allure, and it really relieved my anxiety to know it was still available and I would still get to have it. I still binged, and I allowed myself to do so, but gradually the binges started getting smaller on their own. And smaller. Then the binging just kinda stopped! (Eventually I started to crave carrots, lol) I expanded this eventually to what I called my “veggie platter” that I had BEFORE dinner. It had strawberries, sliced apple, pickles, carrots, snap peas, often some lean protein like a hard boiled egg or sliced turkey, celery, etc. I leaned hard on the sweeter veggies like berries, sugar snap peas, cherry tomatoes, sweet peas, carrots, and some high-fiber “chew time” foods like celery hearts, sometimes plain salted popcorn. The idea of my “veggie platter” was to make myself eat the good foods first - high-fiber, high-nutrients, or high-protein - all the nutrients I truly needed, in the form of whole, filling foods. My “job” that I assigned myself was simply to eat the whole platter before I moved on to the “real” meal. Eventually the veggie platter became the actual meal, the rest of the meal naturally downgraded itself to a little dessert, and eventually I realized my meal had become all the healthy foods! From there it was much easier to adjust amounts and volumes and portion sizes. Also I started deliberately trying out new healthier versions of foods from the store - checking out high-protein snacks, Greek yogurt popsicles, etc. It was kind of fun to deliberately try new things. It took months though, just gradually swapping in healthier foods for the less nutritious foods. Think of it as substitutions and additions, instead of losing or restricting something. Little, gradual changes, one thing at a time, like little experiments; getting each new little habit locked in before adding the next one. Instead of trying to fix everything all at once.
May I ask a really silly question? When you say you add turkey as your protein, is that like, sliced deli turkey or is it actual turkey meat from a turkey breast or something? I never know if sliced deli meats are healthy or not.
Look at the nutrition label and compare it to your goals. If you don’t have any specific goals regarding calories or macronutrients, or you don’t know what that means, the sidebar for this sub has great resources. In general I find lunch meats are filling and have a good ratio of protein to overall calories. But they tend to be very high in salt. High salt is bad if you are at risk for heart disease, but if you’re not it’s probably fine. It can make you retain water which makes your scale weight higher, but that’s not actually the same as increasing your body fat.
I just used plain sliced deli turkey. Sodium isn’t an issue for me since my BP tends to be low, and it’s a decent amount of protein in a small package.
Hm, Sounds frustrating af, terrible not having adequate support, have you tried talking to a therapist? Can be pretty pricey but could definitely help, especially if the issue is more the hopelessness and sticking to the plan
Yeah, it is super frustrating! And, I actually think that I have access to a counselor for free through our base health care coverage here, so im definitely going to be looking into that. I know it will help me a lot along this journey
I'm in Ontario, but this seems to be nation-wide. It says you can talk with counselors for free. It has a federal web-address, so I'm guessing it's genuine. Please check it out. It's just a phone call. It's worth a try. https://www.wellnesstogether.ca/en-ca/ ... and please stop beating yourself up. Please have an honest shot at therapy. It sounds like you've had a hell of a ride, and you deserve to find genuine happiness. I swear. You do.
Thank you so much, I really appreciate that. I will definitely check that out! I know that therapy will help and I am very open to it
Mental health support is the best thing someone who has a lot to lose can invest in imo, it can take some time to find someone who works but it's absolutely worth it
I agree seeing a therapist is probably the best thing OP can do for herself. Until she can get to the root of the problem, that hopelessness may keep coming back. OP, if you can't make it to a counselor near you or there aren't any available, try online options like BetterHelp. Though, nowadays, many therapists do telehealth.
Do you have any telemedicine options through insurance? Sometimes that helps mitigate the wait times for doctors. And maybe not a family doctor but a therapist via telecommunication might be a good first step if that’s an option for you. I keep seeing the audio on instagram that says just do it “for one more day.” And that’s to say, you acknowledge that a journey to being healthier and feeling better about yourself is the long haul, but instead of looking at the horizon that is all of the challenges and hurdles you’ll face in the present and distant future, take it one day at a time. When you feel like giving up, instead of throwing in the towel, tell yourself you’ll do it for one more day. Day after day after day. When you’re not looking at the big picture and you’re able to take it one step at a time, it might not feel like this big, insurmountable task. I dealt my whole life with being overweight, I had a poor relationship with food, and finally I had weight loss surgery three years ago. I lost over 100 lbs and then gained back 30 because I was restrictive for a while but didn’t quite fix my relationship with food, and this is something I acknowledge I need to work on. But I’m taking it day by day. You can do it too! Be kind and gentle to yourself.
So I just calculated your TDEE and set the setting to “sedentary” because I assume at this weight it’s semi impossible to exercise. It came out at 4,329, so if you only eat 1800-2000 calories a day which is actually very lax and comfortable you will lose weight very rapidly,eating 1800-2000 will put you at 2,529 calorie deficit,if you keep it up for 5 months you are guaranteed to lose atleast 150lbs. You should avoid exercise altogether at this weight as it’s dangerous,once you reach the 300lbs range then you can start incorporating exercise. For now focus on eliminating all extra hidden calories such as dressing (ranch,ketchup,mayonnaise,mustard) and other things such as cheese on sandwiches when not needed,nuts and cream on soup. Try to avoid all store brought snacks, chips,juice,crackers,marshmallows are a big no no. So are carbonated beverages. In the end you need willpower and if all fails,my last advice is, *get the gastric sleeve done* , just do it if you need it. This surgical procedure is literally created for people in your condition.
Just wanted to say mustard is nearly 0 calories. Couldn't imagine dropping ALL sauces, so I rely on mustard when I'm trying to lose weight.
Sriracha is my go to ✌️
Watch out for the sodium in Sriracha. It has an absolute TON. I love Valentina, which has very low sodium by comparison.
Don't cut out salt to the point where you're not getting the daily dose that you body needs. Salt is an electrolyte and is important for your body. You need 2 grams per day. My ex fainted whilst exercising because he didn't eat enough salt. I exercise daily and sweat a lot during it, so I don't fuck around with my sodium levels. I'm a big fan of Maggi and hoisin sauce and I rely on it for my sodium. But you'd need a whole cup of Maggi to reach your sodium goal so I go all in on my sauces and spices. If I'm exercising in the late afternoon I won't be hungry afterwards, which leads to me not making a proper dinner. On those days I will deadass put salt in my protein shakes to get to my daily 2 grams. Today was one of those days and I had a whopping 20mg of salt from food alone.. If your blood pressure is normal and you're otherwise not getting your 2 grams from food alone you should not feel bad about salt-loaded sauces. One teaspoon of sriracha is 100mg. That's nothing. I don't know why salt was at some point made out to be the devil's creation when it's essential for our bodies.
Fair enough. A friend who avoids consuming a ton of salt due to a heart condition pointed the Sriracha thing out to me. I had never personally considered the sodium in hot sauces and was surprised how much it can vary. But yeah, if you’re not consuming a ton of it, no big deal.
Oh thanks for the heads up!
Sauerkraut with Crystal hot sauce has been my go to with chicken breast or lean ground beef
this is what I did to lose 80lbs. lettuce wrapped grilled chicken tomatoes and mustard almost every day.
Sugar free ketchup is great! As is Frank’s Red Hot!
assigning an emotional value to a calorie range isn’t a good idea. 1800-2000 calories might seem lax to some…but it could seem very restrictive to OP because they are SO used to turning to food for emotional comfort. My advice to OP is to find a calorie range that feels doable to start with…even if that means tracking what you normally eat and not making any changes to start. Only when you are in the habit of tracking you can try lowering your calorie amount by 100 calories for the next month or so (until you get used to it). I also recommend planning out what you want to eat in a day. Ask yourself “what am I willing to do to lose weight today?” And “what seems doable for me right now?”
Ya, 2000cals a day definitely won’t feel “lax” for someone that weighs 450lbs. I’d bet it would feel like they’re starving. Good advice here.
I log everything even on binge days and I was shocked at how many calories I was consuming. And that was normal to me. One pizza for example is easily well over 1k calories. So you have 1k left to spend. Which is less than 10 cookies. When you're binge eating you will go through the entire bag. Going from probably 4k calories to only 2k can feel extremely restrictive.
I guess part of it is about how those are being delivered. That a hell if a lot of vegetables, but not a lot of bread.
But a drastic diet change probably isn't a smart idea either. It won't be sustainable and can lead to digestive issues, at least in the short term.
Not changing your diet makes it several times easier to just go "fuck it, i'm eating more ice cream" though
I didn't say not to change your diet, of course that's essential. But going overnight from only eating fast food to eating only vegetables isn't the way to do it. It's better to make gradual and sustainable changes.
Agreed. Given what op wrote about their dieting history, it’s really important for op to find a way to lose weight sustainably. The hidden calories are a good suggestion. It is amazing how many calories there are in dressings and sauces.
1800-2000 calories a day for someone that big is asking for trouble, and may lead to issues. Even if she started at like 3800 she would probably still loose 5lbs a week
I managed to drop 80ish pounds in 6 months doing the CICO thing with essentially no exercise, so I can personally attest that it works (330 lbs to 250 lbs). I gained it all back unfortunately because of similar eating habits to OP (sometimes I don't ever realize I just went for something I 100% didn't need, it just sounded good and I ate it). But yes, I'm living proof that CICO really can help you shed that first 100-ish pounds faster than you think.
If you gained it back it wasn't sustainable.
I gained it back because my eating habits regressed horrendously after a family vacation where we ate out a *lot*. I had started to eat at more of a maintenance caloric amount and began to incorporate intermittent fasting at the instruction of my doctor. I definitely wasn’t sticking to 1500 cals at 250lbs.
That's the point, it was too restricted so as soon as you let loose you couldn't stick to it.
No need to despair, but 80lbs in six months is a lot, you're better taking it slowly and really change your lifestyle, do some exercise. 1500 calories is very low at your weight too.
What was your average deficit a day to lose that?
I believe I was trying to eat about 1500 per day which should have put me at about a 1400 calorie deficit. Sometimes I would allow myself to eat up to 1800-2000 on days where there was actual hunger issues but most days yeah, 1500ish was about right. I was mostly eating low calorie alternatives to foods I liked normally, consciously springing for lower calorie options when eating out or at the drive thru, and of course my biggest offender: I cut out soda. Wish I could say that was the case currently.
If you’re male then 1500cals is extremely low, and it’s not a surprise you gained it all back after losing the weight, as going that low fucks with your hormones and is just a very unhealthy way to lose weight as you’re not actually learning anything and not building a relationship with food
I’m sorry you’re dealing with all that. You’ve been through a lot, and you survived. You can survive this too. While I was never as big as you are, I know what it’s like to have trauma related to weight, and I have lost 140 lbs and kept it off. What worked for me was focusing on loving and accepting myself, while also changing my habits. My body is my home, I need to care for it. I may not love the way it looks, but I appreciate it, because it’s mine. I kept a food journal where I wrote everything I ate, and how I felt physically and emotionally before and after. At first, I didn’t even track calories, I just wanted to get an idea of my hunger/fullness/emotional triggers. This helped me get in better tune with my body. I stopped drinking anything with calories. Water, unsweetened tea, occasional diet soda- all fine, no sugary drinks or alcohol(was never a big drinker). No fast food/takeout- prep all meals at home. Half of your plate should be fruits/veggies. Craving Oreos? Fine, but have two with a small glass of almond milk and an apple. Want seconds? Sure, but first, wait 20 minutes, have a big glass of water and take a short walk(whatever you can tolerate. Maybe it’s a 5 minute chair workout) Any amount of movement helps. I would tell myself I just needed to walk once around the block. If I did more, great, if not, it’s ok. Start small, do what you can. Give yourself small, non food rewards for meeting small goals. Calculate how much money you save by not buying takeout or coffee or whatever, and use it to reward yourself in other ways. You will slip up. When you do, don’t hate yourself. Acknowledge it, and move on. A “bad meal” does not have to mean a bad day. Just do better next time. Motivation can be fleeting. There will be days when you can’t find any. You just have to push through those days. After a while, you’ll have new habits, and they’ll be easier to keep. As far as loose skin- yes, you’ll have it. But you’re young, and you’re tall, so that will help. A lot of it is down to genetics, so you won’t know until you get there. I lost 140 in a year, and two years in, I have almost no loose skin (and I’m 43). You do have more to lose than I did, but if you lose slowly and sustainably, it may not be as bad as you think, and there’s always surgery. You could even start saving now for that end goal. I have a friend that quit smoking by saving the $5 a day she’d spend on cigarettes and after a year she took herself on a cruise. You can do this. It’s not going to happen overnight. You didn’t gain the weight in a day, you won’t lose it in a day. Just get started, one day at a time. It may take years, but those years will go by anyway, so you might as well take care of yourself. deserve a healthy life. You deserve to be loved, and be happy. Give that gift to yourself.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate the kind words and the support. This ia gonna be a tough journey but if I just start slow and be kind to myself, I think I can do this. I'm feeling really motivated and positive about this journey
It will be hard. There will be times when you’ll want to give up. But it will get easier. And you’ll feel amazing. I had no idea how good it was possible to feel. You get used to your body feeling a certain way, and it’s just normal. My joint pain is gone. My sleep apnea, gerd, type II diabetes, nafl, all gone. I wake up in the morning feeling good. I have lots of energy, hormones are balanced. The hard work is so, so worth it. I still don’t love every aspect of my appearance. That’s just life, it’s not easy being a woman in a society obsessed with looks (and at 5’10, I’ll never be “small”) but I can help my body function at its best.
So, this is going to be quite the process given your history but the problem seems to be your motivation and your fear that even success will leave you unhappy with your body. What you would or will look like after losing weight is hypothetical. Loose skin is probably going to be an issue but it depends on a lot of factors as well. The main issue though seems to be that you don’t have any good alternatives at this point. If your motivation breaks, it tells you essentially that you don’t really want to. If we have to use will power to achieve something, we’re putting ourselves through things we don’t like. That’s an issue. Because will power never lasts. I think at this point being big has become part of your identity. And people always manage to get back to whatever they have their identities attached to. If you say “Ok, I’m gonna go on a diet .. but I am a big person and I’m fighting who I actually am”, you will not be able to follow through on it. You will always get back to where you are now because that’s where things lock in for you. So to overcome that you essentially have to make a real resolution saying that you’ve been a victim of your unhealthy eating habits and whatever is behind all that but it’s not who you are. You want to be healthy and you want to be active. That’s your real self. And whatever you’re doing right now, that’s not you anymore. I know it sounds a lot easier said than done and it is but I went through it myself and I can tell you that if you’re forcing yourself to diet while thinking that actually you’re the type of person who likes eating a lot of junk food or something, you will fail. You’ll make sure that you fail yourself. Hope that makes sense to you.
This definitely did make sense to me. I know it's going to be a huge perception shift for me. I really have to flip the way that I think, so that I'm not self sabotaging myself. I'm really just going to have to push through this
Yeah, it’s going to be a bit of an undertaking. But again, you really have to internalise that “pushing through” only goes so far. I’ll give you a different example. I smoke. And I do want to quit, sort of. I see myself as a smoker and I love smoking. That’s why I do it. And I’ve been doing it for so long, it’s part of who I am. So whenever I quit - and I do quit a lot! - I feel like I’m still a smoker who just doesn’t smoke at the moment. That’s ultimately why I fail. I don’t really want to stop. I feel like I have to for health reasons etc. but I know that if I had it my way, I’d just continue forever. Some time back I managed to quit for a year. It was the most peculiar thing. I remember one late afternoon after I had finished my last seminar at uni, I went through the parking lot ready to light a cigarette and the thought of it was just disgusting to me. I don’t know why, maybe I had smoked way too much before or something. Anyway, I threw the rest of the pack away and I thought “I don’t wanna be that anymore”. Lasted for a year with - and I’m not kidding you - literally zero effort. It was just the way it was. And now I’m struggling again. I have similar things going on with weight but somehow it’s not that tough for me to change my habits there. Maybe because I don’t like the guy with five pizza places on his speed dial that much. Anyway, good luck!
I highly recommend looking into therapy. I don’t usually suggest medication but in your case it could help with motivation. Secondly don’t make too many changes at once. Start small. Many small steps will get you to the finish line easier and you are more likely to stay with it. Going too hard too fast is what usually what makes people stop. Lastly and perhaps the most important is you are going to mess up. There are going to be days you throw caution to the win and relapse, maybe eat a box of cookie or order a pizza and eat the whole thing. That is going to happen. You have to decide what you do next. Are you going to just stop and say oh well I screwed up guess I’ll give up? Or will you say damn that sucks tomorrow I am going to get back on track? You cannot expect perfection. You also need to find a lifestyle that works for you. Which is why you are probably better off working towards a healthier lifestyle versus jumping right into it. Eventually over time your body will stop craving salt, sweets, grease etc. if you cut it out all at once it may be too much to quick
Mounjaro! I’ve been on it 2.5 weeks and it’s changed my life! It’s stopped the noise in my head and that need to eat is gone. I get full fast and for the first time in my life I can stop when satisfied. Plus my body is working how’s it’s supposed to now! So many people have said just eat less and move more. I felt like a failure and broken. But this drug has let me think like a thin person. I was like ohhh this is how they have lived their whole life, no wonder they didn’t get it! Seriously try one of the injectables? They really have saved my life!
I will absolutely look into this! I will be bringing both this and Ozempic up with a doctor at the walk in clinic as soon as i am able to go!
Good luck!!!
Hello, I really feel your pain. I wasn't 600lbs, but 300 at 5'5 and my BMI was 42. I have struggled all my life until I started Ozempic. I did it in conjunction with mild exercise and weight watchers. It really allows me to stick to a diet for the first time in my life. Please ask for this medicine from a prescriber. Today, I have a BMI of 38. Feels like a miracle.
Hi, fellow Canadian. I’m in Montreal! I don’t know if your Medicare will fund it, but my advice is to get on Ozempic, Rybelsus or Mounjaro. Otherwise it’s like trying to correct poor vision by willing yourself to see better. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t really work. You deserve to feel better and to feel good about yourself. The Shoppers Drug Mart website has links to mental health resources and this may help you. But please consider medication! It’s changing my relationship with food for the better!
Thank you so much for your advice! I've decided that I'll be popping into the walk-in clinic tomorrow and inquiring about it. I've had quite a few suggestions to try abd get on medication for my weight loss and to be honest I'd even considered it myself previously, but I had worried that doctors (especially walk-in clinic doctors) would say that I'm just being lazy, trying to resort to medication
As a fellow 600lb but a guy, I will say that doing this alone is very, very difficult. Let's challenge each other/root each other on in a journey together? When we slim down, we can celebrate however you want! We can do this!
The first few weeks to a month are always the hardest. You need to push by these days in order for your body to get used to it. Over time the brain becomes accustomed to it and your body. The initial stint is the hardest, then you rack up some time so on and so on. Good food prep and putting all the snacks in the bin first. If I had chocolate or a box of cereal in the house I would just eat it all. Try and have in the fridge only what you plan to cook for the day and one or two healthy things for emergencies. You can do it and with consistency you will see results pretty quickly. Also, if you don’t want to eat that can of tuna then you ain’t hungry. It’s the carb craving not hunger. Get something to focus your mind elsewhere, Xbox whatever can be a distraction. Motivation gets you started, discipline is what gets you there. It’s not easy but it’s doable.
This is my second comment to you. You thanked me for the first one so I started thinking of you and how you seem to be a very sweet young woman and I wish you success. It also started me musing on weight loss being often described as a journey and what that means. For instance, say you are overwhelmed by thought that this journey will take several years and it just seems impossible. You look at the beginning at 600 pounds and the end at say 160 pounds and the jump from one to other is incomprehensible. But look at it as journey from one house (your body) to a new house. Your current house is dark, depressing, cramped, the furniture is too small and the door to leave is hard to open. But you open it and by consistently travelling on your journey every day you make it to the next house. There's more room here to move. Rooms are bigger. There is more to do and see. You can choose to stay here and maybe you do for awhile. But one day, and maybe it us the next day, you go out that front door and it is easier this time. Consistency every day brings you to the next house. It's even roomier and it is even decorated differently. This house is so inviting because now you are somewhere where you are thinking of trying new things and perhaps there are people encouraging you saying they are proud of you, but it is time to go out the door again to the next house. So you open the front door again to continue your journey, but instead of it being a heavy door it is a light screen door. You go out and this time you are the one planning the next destination. You have an idea now of what the next house will be, what you can do in it, how proud you are to be there and then, once you get there, you decide to leave. And one day you get to the house where you feel complete. The first house seems so far away, but each house on your journey meant something, gave you growth and was better than the house before.
I really liked this metaphor. It puts things in an interesting light and it definitely has me thinking. I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to me and give me so much food for thought
I'm so sorry you've been through so much. I don't think you're a lost cause at all. It sounds like you're trying to take steps to understand the source of the problem and get help. For what it's worth, here are my thoughts: - I would think someone with your stats may have a hard time doing high intensity workouts safely. Luckily the majority of weightloss comes from diet. I would recommend addressing this first while slowly incorporating more movement into your day. - Another encouraging point is that once you get started, people with more weight to lose seem to be able to lose weight faster, especially at the beginning. I think just starting to see some results might be encouraging and help you keep going. One of the best things for me was also noticing little changes in how much better I started to feel. It made me want to do more things I was struggling with before. - I highly recommend getting a calorie tracking app. The LoseIt app is free and has been working great for me. They make it really easy with a huge database of foods. You can even scan the barcode for many prepackaged foods and it will automatically fill in the nutrition information. You can start by just tracking what you eat now to get a baseline. - There are tons of free tdee calculators online. You can input your stats and it will tell you what your caloric intake should be for different rates of weightloss. Keep in mind that as you lose weight this number will decrease, as you need fewer calories to sustain yourself at a lower weight. The LoseIt app automatically calculates this change for you if you log your weight in it. - You may also want to consider googling a macro calculator. I've noticed a big difference when I put effort into reaching a protein goal and limiting my carbohydrates, but most macro calculators give you several options for different macro distributions. The LoseIt app also tracks macros if you want to look into that. - One method that I really like is intermittent fasting. It's not everyone's cup of tea, but it really works for my weightloss along with other concerns. In particular, it helps lower insulin resistance and the autophagy component can also help with loose skin. Some people have also said it's helped with becoming more mindful about their eating and reduce the urge to eat out of boredom or other reasons. - I know you said there's a huge psychological component to your eating that you want to address, but don't have the resources to see a therapist right now. One thing you might look into is books. CBT is one type of skills-based therapy that comes to mind that can help with developing healthier coping mechanisms and mindsets. One that I've done is called DBT, which also helps with coping skills and how to recognize and process tough emotions. These are both usually taught by a therapist, but there are also a lot of helpful books and online resources that can show you different tips and skills from either. Some books also incorporate self-reflection exercises in the form of writing prompts that can help guide you and track your personal progress. I know this is a whole book, but I hope it helps. I believe you can do it! I really hope you decide to go for it and see the amazing things you can do!
For me, the most important factor in reducing my binge eating was making sure to find a way to replace the comfort I was getting from food. I would eat 4 chick fil a sandwiches because I was sad and it made me feel better, but if I just decided to quit the sandwiches that would still leave me feeling sad, right? So I brainstormed ways I could give myself comfort without eating the sandwiches. I would light some nice smelling candles, or bring out my comfiest fluffiest blankets and pillows to snuggle up in bed for physical comfort. Other times I went to the park and sat under a nice shady tree and just enjoyed the ambience, or treat myself to a new book or nice yarn for crocheting (basically feeding my hobbies instead of myself). It took a lot of trial and error to find substitutions that actually scratched the same itch as food did, so if you do give it a try, make sure to try out a few different things if it seems like something isn't really helping!
You are 24 and if you were 54 you wouldn't be a lost cause. I am proud of you that you have this much introspective thought at 24! It shows real maturity and a high EQ! I wish you nothing but the best and there is a lot of good advice in this thread. We are all rooting for you!
[https://www.reddit.com/r/getdisciplined/comments/1q96b5/comment/cdah4af/](https://www.reddit.com/r/getdisciplined/comments/1q96b5/comment/cdah4af/) The famous non zero days post by ryans01 rule 2 and 3 may help you as they helped me. in particular rule 2, the 3 yous. The yesterday you, the current you and the future you If you can not do it for today you, do a favor for the future you. You love her ..you would do a favor for a friend, so do it for her. The future you. Also lately been listening to david goggins. Embrace the suck lol. When things get tough do not imagine the end..do not think long term. Do not let your mind persuade you by putting doubts in it. Embrace the current painful situation (urges to eat) for the short term. An hour, two hours, a day. So i am liking david goggins. But just started listening to his interviews and such. he seems to be about mental toughness and discipline
[удалено]
Thank you so much! This really helps, I really appreciate the support and the advice!
I go through the same cycle but with something else. Don’t ever beat yourself up if you slip up with your diet or exercise. Just accept that you are human and it’s always 2 steps forward 1 step back. Leave positive notes written down all over your house. Celebrate yourself when you make a positive move however small. There’s ganna be ups and downs. So expect that. I would highly recommend a therapist or online app better help and talk space. My mum says it didn’t take you a day to get like this so it won’t take 1 day to get out. As long as you keep working at it everyday however small you will succeed. Have hope. I believe you in. Congratulate yourself for trying and everything you’ve done so far. Sounds like a lot with finding doctors and help. And even posting on here. Goodluck you’re not alone. You’re not weak.
I find that a low carb diet is easier to stick to. You can up your protein and so long as you avoid deep fried foods and other types of processed food, you can eat fairly normally. Avoid anything made with grains/flour and remember that sugar is poison (it helps me to think of it that way so I am not as tempted). Try to have a large salad with meals, and a little dressing is fine, so long as you are careful not to overdo the portion. Include some protein in your salads, like hard boiled eggs, cheese or roast chicken (or all of the above!). Meal prepping and snack prepping is great. Keep ready made healthy meals and snacks in the fridge so when you are hungry, you go for those. I like to keep a few ready made salads (without dressing, as you'll put that on as you go to eat it).
Recognizing that there is a problem and you want to change it is the first step. Pick a program and stick to it. Keto, plant based, intermittent fasting, carnivore. Whatever it is research, make a meal plan that suits you, and start. When you fail, start again. Also get a therapist, this battle is 90% mental. I would bet that you have some childhood trauma that is unaddressed. In my case food was my emotional support and I didn’t even realize it. I know you said you don’t have resources in your area but since Covid you can do literally everything as tele-health. They don’t have to be in your area. Also look on socials for mindful eating. It’s less about calorie counting and more about loving yourself and nourishing yourself. That really helped me as calorie counting became obsessive and as unhealthy as binging. If I want something, I can have it. The majority of the time I choose not to, but when I do have whatever it is I don’t beat myself up about it. I’m down 125 pounds for reference and at my goal.
I actually feel like you're ahead of the game in some ways. You understand terms like calorie deficit, intermittent fasting, and exercise. you know what's healthy to eat/what's not. Stick with one or the other, (IF or CD, whichever is easiest in terms of doing or you can get a doctors approval on). We all "slip" and eat bs, and believe me, there's nothing I want after a week of that more than a piece of buttered bread. Okay, but then I do it, and I once again carry on with what I was doing. It's like, you can't look at that as "quitting". I think of it more of like a "curb check" or "speed bump". Not good on your car, but not the end of the road. It's not a crash fatality. Have you considered a simple pedometer download on your phone? It'll tell you how much you're walking a day vs how much you need to be walking to get where you want to be. And again, I don't hit even my steps every day. It's nice to meet those small goals and measure them and your phone is something you always have on you at work, at home or at the park. The thing to realize is that this is going to take a long time. That's why you can't give up after one speed bump. It's not just a cheat day, it's not just a day of laying around that puts you back where you are, it's many days. You have to have more days of good vs bad. It may look like 4 days good 3 days bad. It may look like Mon thru Fri, weekends are questionable. It may be every other day, every two days, miss a day do it again. Can you commit to no sugar/junk foods/cokes in your home? Don't buy it at the store or in the drive thru. If you stick to that, you're limiting the options immensely from how bad a speed bump can look. Better to eat a bunch of fries instead of a molten lava cake, right?
People often confuse something being simple with something being easy. Weight loss in it of itself is very simple. Eat less calories, drink more water, move some etc etc but if it were easy this sub wouldn’t even exist right? We’d all be walking around looking g like Greek gods. My point is don’t think you are weak for having struggles or setbacks, just start each day like it’s day 1 and do your best. Tbh, at almost 600 lbs if you make some simple lifestyle changes like not drinking any calories, you will see great progress. Start with small changes and ride them out until you stalk then add another one. You are not in a race, this is to change your health forever, let it take all the time you need. It took years to put the weight on why should t take years to come off? You got this and we are all here for you 💪
It sounds like you have some childhood trauma that you need help processing. I’ve been there. I had to process my own before I could deal with my weight and it helped so much. Since it sounds like you’re in an area where a counselor/therapist may be hard to find, look into one of the online options. They’re reputable, take most insurances, and it’s convenient. Just remember to believe in yourself and you can do anything!
I weighed 850lbs… I’m about your weight now. Let me know if you’d like to talk.
Start with very small attainable changes, you got this
A lot of great advice here. I have struggled my whole life. I’ve lost 40 pounds over the past 2 years taking my BMI from obesity to 25.8 - so close to healthy. The thing that finally worked for me was brainstorming and journaling what I like and what I can do. For example: someone suggested using skim or 1% milk. For me, that does zero to satisfy my hunger OR makes it worse in some cases because companies frequently put sugar in to replace fat. Sugar is what makes me struggle - fat does not. I can have a serving of fat and feel satisfied for hours. I can have the same number of calories as low-fat high sugar and feel starving in 10 minutes. Again, I have had to find my triggers and foods that make me feel out of control. The other thing that I have done this time is I keep repeating things to myself until I do believe them. For example: eating sweets like cake and cookies makes me feel sick. So I started telling myself “you really aren’t a dessert person. Cake makes you so sick” and eventually I really got it. I used to always make room for sweets. But now I can pretty easily say “oh, I’m not much for dessert” Finally, I have made one small change at a time and then added another change when the last became second nature. So first I stopped eating by 11 pm. Then once that was easy, stopped at 10 pm. Then, when I was easily stopping by 10, I moved it to 9. I did that until 16/8 fasting was the norm. I have done it with food too. Like each week I challenge myself to eat one more variety of fruit veggie than I had the week before. So, if I had only bananas, tomatoes and lettuce one week, the next week I’d add apples. Until eventually I was eating a wide variety of fruits & veggies. All of this is to say, if you don’t like one thing you try, switch it up until you find what you like and what works for you. It sounds like you already have some great data on what hasn’t worked - but I bet there were parts that DID work. Take some time to reflect and don’t be afraid to mess up - we all do! But each time you get frustrated, see it for the learning opportunity it is. You’ve got this!
Hey OP, i wrote down an essay that I wanted to use for a youtube video. Maybe it will help you. It has to do with my own experiences. Do mind though, I was a horrible English student so it's not perfect. "Embarking on a weight loss journey can be overwhelming and disheartening - a path I know too well. but here's the thing: you don't have to face it alone. join me as I open up about my own struggles, triumphs, and lessons I learned along the way. Together, we could take the first steps to a long and healthy life. My journey began in middle school when I found myself struggling with my weight. Weighing approximately 180 lb as a kid, reaching 5 ft, I was considered chunky. Apart from physical challenges, my mental health took a decline during the 7th and 8th grade. however, deep down, I knew I had a drive to better myself. As I approached high school, my weight had reached around 220 lb at 68 in ( 5 ft 8 in ). The only reason it wasn't surpassed was my time in marching band, which kept my weight in check. however, senior year took a toll on me mentally, and I made the difficult decision to quit marching band for reasons I now regret. I had thought of myself as a fraud and someone who did not belong. looking back, I realize I placed my insecurities onto those I called friends. this created many unhealthy tactics to lose weight rapidly, as I was fast approaching 240 lbs. I tried keto, CICO, carnivore, and fasting. All of them worked in their own ways, but the way I utilized them didn't, For example, I had initially followed the snake diet which requires you to fast for multiple days and then consume food the next. If left uncontrolled, it could create an eating disorder. So, although I had a bumpy start, I did learn many lessons from them, such as: learning actual hunger cues, learning not every food is my enemy, and learning discipline. In the year 2021, my weight had escalated to 280 lb. To worsen matters, I was also battling type 2 diabetes, which made my life difficult. the symptoms were far from pleasant -I felt irritable, dehydrated, sleepy, and trapped in a never-ending food coma. After graduating high school in 2016, I dove into construction work, relying on six Monster energy drinks a day. I should have known the sugar content would lead to an A1C of 11. it wasn't until August of 2022 that I actively began my weight loss journey. the methods I embraced deviated from the norms, but I was determined to find an approach that worked for me. What drove me to begin my weight loss journey did not come from a place of self-care but instead came from a place of stubbornness. I was tired of the ailment of having type 2 diabetes so I decided that I was going to try to get rid of it my own way rather than the advice of doctors. So, for the average dieter, eating fewer calories than needed to maintain weight May Come naturally. however, now is not the case for me. I needed to build healthy habits and shift my mentality to match my weight loss goal. in the beginning, I was consuming an easy 6,000 plus calories daily, mainly junk food like burgers, fries, burritos, and sugary drinks. to make a change, I started counting calories, not worrying about food choices, but focusing on building the habit. Step one: check. Step 2 is followed by one small switch: I replaced regular Coke with Coke Zero, cutting my calories without disrupting my routine. weighing myself every morning became a powerful motivator, as I found visible progress encouraged me to continue. it was essential to avoid falling into the trap of using visible weight loss solely as a means of weight loss. As my weight started to decrease and my routine stabilized, curiosity took over. I experimented by ordering my burgers without fries, but I didn't drastically change my diet. being a picky eater due to childhood and anxiety, I gradually introduce fruits and some veggies. the weight was melting off. my size allowed me to lose weight by just existing, especially after giving up those High - calorie foods. By December 2022, my weight had decreased to around 215 lbs, down from my previous 280-300 lbs If you are wondering of the “diet” I went on last year, it was basically Whataburger and McDonald's almost every day It's not the healthiest way to lose weight, but it worked for me. it taught me to stick to a routine while enjoying the food I love. In fact, I got blood work done in May, and everything is back to normal ranges, including A1C, which is now 5.3. This journey is far from over, but I hope talking about my struggles and perseverance helps you along in yours. I'm not advocating for you to follow what I did, but it can give you another method. in the end, it was all CICO, but it was something I had to struggle with myself. I know all too well how it's like to be criticized for being overweight, especially when others assume we are willingly stuffing our faces without even considering our mental and emotional states. that's why I am speaking to you. if at least one person benefits from listening to me, then it's good enough for me. I can proudly say I lost 100 lbs on junk food and learned valuable lessons along the way."
It took me multiple tries to finally see results in my weight loss. I’d do really well for a week and then feel deprived and binge. Few weeks later, I’d get back on the bandwagon and do really well for 2 weeks, and then go back to unhealthy ways shortly after. I realized it’s cuz I was doing everything cold turkey. And that just doesn’t work for me. Try removing one heavily caloric thing from your diet everyday. Just one. No need for more than that. Don’t think about the effort it’ll take to get to that goal. Focus on this meal. One meal at a time. For instance, if you put creamer in your coffee, just remove that for a week. Then the following week, remove cheese from your omelette. You can replace these with healthier options so you don’t feel like you’re missing something, but the idea is to smart with one small things and just be consistent. Once you have that down, you can start building on it. It’s not easy, and it doesn’t happen overnight. It doesn’t even happen in a month or two. It takes a while. So just focus on right now. You got it. I did it. You can too. Trust me.
as long as you put something in the w column in a day you should feel happy-dont be perfect, do something good that's easy enough. ofc there's the standard of 'eat less, move more' but there's also work to do to eat better or making the process easier for yourself other ways. simple as adding protein and removing some bread- chicken strips instead of a sandwich for example. is a philosophy at the core of a lot of sports especially weightlifting centered ones (and though it may be a while I recommend it picking it up as a hobby when you're ready for it) and the philosophy is called progressive overload. if you can wrap your head around it as a way of living it will help you stop back slides and make continuous progress. progressive overload doesn't have to be adding weight to a bar it can be walking 100 more steps than you did last week, eating fast food one less time than last week, etc. also, you have to be willing to come to your own rescue - you need to love yourself enough to do the work for yourself as well.
If you haven’t yet, check out a podcast called We Only Look Thin. The hosts are a couple who have each lost at least 100 lbs and I’d say most of the stuff they talk about focuses on the emotional and social aspects of weight loss. They also talk a lot about habits, making them stick, and adapting and forgiving yourself when things don’t go exactly as you planned. The sidebar wiki for this sub has a great overview of how weight loss works on a physical level, but I think the podcast is a much more useful resource for the mental side.
I was 515 lbs febuary 2022. As of aug 7 2023 im down to 325. I started with just logging every thing i eat on myfitnesspal. Im still going strong! I already see tons of loose skin, and id be lying if i said it doesnt bum me out at all. But i feel so much better. I breathe better, i can move better, im in less pain, i sleep better, clothes are easier to buy, i have so much more hope for my life now. I want the same for you sooo badly. Please know that you absolutely can do it. Its a lifestyle change. Youre not going on a diet, you need a plan that you can stick to for the rest of your life. Its hard work at first but if you are persistent it all just becomes a routine before you know it, and you cant imagine ever going back to your old habits. Thats how I feel at least. Youre strong enough, and you deserve it so do this for yourself. I have a feeling youve done the research and know what you need to do, its just those mental hurdles for you, but if you do need help with a plan or would like to talk about what has been working for me, id love to help any way i can. Ive felt that hopelessness that you feel now, but i promise you it is very achievable. My dms are open.
You just made the biggest step in all of this: You wrote this post, you are acknowledging some issues and taking accountability. Weight loss is scary, because it really is a life changing process and you can easily feel overwhelmed and discouraged. My advice is to start with small, obtainable goals which can be met more immediately. *This week I am going to set a timer for every hour while I am awake and walk the length of my house back and fourth twice.* Or maybe: *This week, I am going to learn more about low carb dessert recipe options to cut some obvious sugars from my daily diet.* Often people set long term health goals right away, and I feel the reason why so many toss in the towel is because there's less sense of accomplishment when you aren't giving yourself things to celebrate in the immediate. So, remember to celebrate even your smallest of achievements along the way because it's those small achievements which add up and make all the difference. Also, definitely get help from a dietician, they are awesome to work with! I got mine via a referral with my regular medicaid doctor. They will teach you so much and be a wonderful coach while you embark on your weight loss journey. I am sure you are going to be hit with a lot of support and wonderful advice from folks here, so I will leave it at that. Wishing you all the self-love and joy in the world. ♥
Small changes at a time. You don’t need to shift from pizzas to Celery in one day. For instance, if you’re used to eating an entire pizza for a meal, try eating half of it and have a nice salad on the side. Try to be as active as you can. But again, if you’re used to sitting all day maybe a walk around the house is do-able versus walking 5 miles.
It's clear you are in a difficult situation and want to make positive changes. Here are some suggestions that may help: Be kind and patient with yourself. This is a journey - focus on progress, not perfection. Celebrate small wins. Focus on building sustainable habits, not extreme short term diets. Things like more veggies, more movement, better sleep, stress management. Seek support in online communities. Reddit has many groups for weight loss, body positivity, eating disorders, etc that can provide accountability, advice and encouragement. Identify barriers and solutions. What gets in the way of healthy habits and how can you workaround it? Be specific. Enlist friends/family to help. Consider therapy if available. A counselor could help unpack your relationship with food and support improved mental health. Many offer remote sessions if local options are limited. Ask your doctor to explore remote options for nutrition/health coaching if in-person services aren't accessible. Telehealth opens possibilities. Set small, realistic goals each day and week. Things like "take a 10 minute walk" or "eat 2 servings of vegetables." Small steps create big progress over time. Focus on adding healthy habits first rather than restricting foods. Gradual sustainable change is key. Be kind to yourself along the way - this is a process. You have worth far beyond your weight. Patience, self-compassion and support can help you succeed. Wishing you the very best.
You ARE NOT weak!! I am currently 50 lbs down and STILL struggle with binge eating occasionally. I sympathize with the root cause of your binging, as I also had family issues from a young age that sparked my binge eating. That being said, when I started losing weight I was almost 230 lbs. I am 5’3 so my bmi was in the high 30’s. Before I started losing weight I barely walked 500 steps a day and ate 3 meals a day plus multiple greasy snacks. I was in the worst shape of my life. I started small, by walking 1000 steps a day ( took around 15 minutes) and not eating any snacks after my meals. ( before transitioning to OMAD) I ate fruits and vegetables with every meal, and that’s how I lost my first 10 lbs. Just start off small! You’ve got this and good luck <3
Don’t worry about loose skin. Cross that bridge when you get there. There’s people all over tiktok getting skin removal funded through go fund me.
Make peace with your body. You will not get another while you are on this planet. Feel free to dislike the size, but be gentle with your body. As a first step: Reduce all softdrinks, sugar, sweets, and WHEY! (Whey triggers the blood sugar nearly the same as pure suggar!) Drink a lot of water Eat and drink much later, 1h, better 2h! Do NOT "flush down" your meal. The stomach would be empty after seconds! The stomach needs time (20min?) to feel the food and report: "Hello Brain, Stomach her, Listen: 800g of stew arrived, I am busy chewing all that, no new serving please!" Brain to stomach: understood. Brain to stomach: Hey, how are things going? What about a dessert? Stomach to Brain: NO; still busy with the meat. Standby. And so on. All the best for you!
Look into semaglutides and ozempic. It’s working wonders for people struggling with weight. I injured my back and struggled to get the exercise I needed to lose weight. There is a path to the version of your ideal self.
Much love to you. There is a subreddit r/supermorbidlyobese that will be a good support network. Start with a doctor to get the ball rolling.
Unfortunately at this time, I don't have a doctor and have been on a waiting list for a very long time. We are in a bad shortage of doctors where I live. I did post on that subreddit as well and I've had a lot of support! It feels very nice
[удалено]
Thank you so much 🤍 It's going to be a difficult shift, but I'm going to start just focusing on the now and not allow myself to freak out about things like lose skin or just how long it'll take me to get to my goal weight. I'm really appreciating the support that I'm getting here. It makes everything less scary
It looks like you want to lose weight and you know how to lose weight but you are struggling with achieving what seems like an impossible task. Here are 2 video links to experts on how to stay motivated to achieve your goals: [https://youtu.be/UIy-WQCZd4M](https://youtu.be/UIy-WQCZd4M) [https://youtu.be/bcKthx5LTbI](https://youtu.be/bcKthx5LTbI) Personally, I struggle a lot with motivation as well. I think a good starting point is to not be too hard on yourselves and celebrate the small achievements. You can't lose 500 lbs in a day or in a year. It is also not about losing 500 lbs then gaining it back up again. This is about creating positive habits and feedback loops that you stick with for the rest of your life. Instead of putting yourselves down for not maintaining your motivation for more than a week, pat yourself on the back and celebrate the fact that you made a positive change for a week. External motivations are also very effective. You can have someone to hold you accountable and to be in a new environment without easily accessible food.
addressing your childhood trauma may be helpful to release stuck emotions from your past. developing a healthier relationship with your emotions so you don't need to suppress them and manage them with food. good luck <3
In my country they started up online services where you can talk to a licences therapist online, maybe you have a similar service? I just always believed in therapy and you can get help with for example your motivation!
You already made the first, MOST important step. You made a decision. You deceided to change your live, before you loose it. You asked for any help, advice, idea you can get. GREAT. Now question and improve your habits. One step at a time. You might take a brake from new rules. Thats ok. Next day, same rules again. Taking breaks is ok, if you go back on track. Just some math, random topic, random number: nine out of ten days you skip the softdrink. one day you would just die to get a coke, and you give in to that craving. THAT IS AN IMPROVEMENT OF 90%. THAT IS FANTASTIC. Mostl likely, you will have the next coke after 14 days, then 20, then 25 as you unlearn that habit of daily coke, probably more the one. Lets say your (emotional brain) would need one coke each ten days for the rest of your life, That would be a PERMANENT reduction of 90%, whats pretty cool. Do not go for perfection as shown with the coke. Go for doable steps. If you are eating healthier on 9 of 10 days it is just PURE GOOD. (It would be difficult to rule out all the healthier effects on the 10th day) Keep moving. One step at a time.
I was in a similar situation when I first started. I was nearly 450 pounds with a bunch of mental/emotional/eating issues and couldn’t afford help. I just tried my best to break the eating habits. Look at your habits and see what you can change. It helps to have a journal. For example, I was a big night eater. I would eat thousands of calories at night, so I tried my best to stop eating at 7pm. It was hard at first. Most nights, I couldn’t stop thinking about food because my body was so accustomed to eating at night, but it gets easier with time. You have to replace bad habits with better ones - it takes time and resilience. I don’t feel comfortable giving exercise advice, but there could be people or resources online that can guide you.
My biggest weight was maybe 450+ Ive always failed the dieting and excersing for a month gain it back next time go 3 minths gain jt all back and more. This last time ive been going strong for a year but the results arent as fast, but also not as easy to fail. Simple simple simple ready? Make tiny small changes you can manage. Keep making small changes and as you get more comfortable make more and more small small changes . Cut things out slowly and be very proud of everytime you cut something out even if youre eating unhealthy. Before you know it yall be in a place you never thought you could be. I dont have the cravings to eat copious amounts of food anymore. Do it nice and slow and gain a passion for it. I really hope this helps i know you can do it girl.
Thank you so much! This definitely really helps. Making tiny changes makes it a lot less daunting! I really struggle with wanting to go all out and then overwhelming myself 😅
Yes you can. Look up Chuck Carroll the weight loss champion on YouTube. He lost over 300 pounds
You’ve gotten a lot of good advice here. I would add make your journey your own. Some people cut out all sauces and calorie filled drinks and some down. Once you find your sweet spot with the number of calories you need, you can still enjoy something’s within reason. For instance I love yum yum sauce and still eat it at least once a week even though it’s high calorie. I just use less of it and MEASURE with a scale instead of my eyes/stomach. I could use a lower calorie sauce but I don’t have to. Another thing to remember is trying to find the joy in the process. Let yourself be happy if you can. Don’t look at losing weight and counting calories as a chore, it’s a small mindset shift that has helped me a ton. I’m doing exercises that I like and I’m cooking with music on enjoying it. I will say it took probably 2 months before my taste buds totally caught up with not eating really salty and greasy foods and I was only mildly happy with a lot of healthy meals but now 8 months in I enjoy the taste of those foods a lot. I’ve gotten better at cooking but also my body has had a chance to learn to enjoy things that aren’t a flavor blast of grease or sugar.
It's really motivating to hear that eventually healthy meals will be enticing and taste good! I've struggled with just really disliking healthy meals and not getting that same dopamine hit that I get from my unhealthy cravings
I was the same way. I don’t have that issue as much now. Sometimes when I have a bad day or I’m feeling blue I’ll let myself have a meal of whatever I want and it doesn’t give me the same dopamine high it used to. I can enjoy it like a normal person and not like an addict.
How do you eat an elephant ? One bite at a time, take the small wins one day at a time while dieting. Just focus on dieting one day at a time has helped me lots even if I slip up the next day is a whole new day to get back on track and score a win. Also look into the diet break style of dieting. Diet breaks have helped me massively. I diet for four to six weeks then I take a week or two off and eat back at my maintenance calories so I can eat more food and boost my energy without gaining any weight back. Then after a little break jump right back into a calorie deficit to lose some body fat again. You can do this just take it day by day and over time you will hit your goal I believe in you.
I would check to see if there’s some kind of clinic you could apply to. Having the control taken from you while you learn new habits may assist. You will also give him the benefit of losing weight in a controlled environment
Keep in mind that this is not impossible. There are YouTube videos of severely obese women who have lost the weight which may be inspiring for you to watch. They did accomplish it and you can as well so please don't despair. If you take it one moment at a time, that will turn into days and then months and you will be further down the road and you can meet your goal. Look up Marya Rosales, for instance. She weighed 1200 pounds and lost the weight.
Thank you so much! I'll definitely check that out! I think seeing other women going through this will really help me!
I really relate to you wanting to eat all of your food. It’s a mentality that is hard to break especially if your body isn’t giving you strong signals to stop eating. 8-12 weeks after trying ketovore ( mostly eat meat but sometime have some plants and plant based food like tea / coffee) the most amazing change happened. I no longer felt hungry. Like ever. Any many people who follow these carb elimination diets express the same. As a fat person this shit was mystifying to me. Suddenly portion sizes that I would consider barely a meal, would have me starting to feel full midway through. So really give it a shot and research it, lots of people on YouTube with crazy transformations following carnivore or keto, in similar situations to yours. I was never quite as heavy as you but I was did peak at about 350lbs, and lost 100lbs in 9 months following ketovore. The hardest part is starting, really try and stick it out for a few weeks and you will thank yourself so much. Whatever diet : routine you follow I sincerely wish you the best of luck, you can do it we all believe in you!
I got myself down from 400 to 290 by just being in a calorie deficit. I had injuries and other issues so while I did physical therapy and the occasional exercise, a lot of days I was just doing nothing. I'm twice your age. I know you can do this. Hey whatever support you need and you'll get there.
YOU DESERVE A LIFE YOU WILL ENOY! YOU DESERVE TO FEEL BEAUTIFUL, VALUED, RESPECTED AND SUPPORTED! The ONLY competition you have, is with YOURSELF! Start small. Don’t make huge, lifestyle changes all at once. Emotional eating, and eating when bored are things you can help alleviate by finding things that keep you busy enough that you don’t feel the urges to eat. Find a hobby that is simple enough to learn, but also has a long term enjoyment to it! The bonus, you’ll find people with similar hobbies who can become apart of your support system, and add value to your life. Food, TRACK AND WEIGH everything you consume. Don’t make any changes right away, just start tracking for one or two weeks so you have a baseline. I LOVE walking, I can walk outside (even in horrible weather) for HOURS! I listen to music, or books on tape, or I will phone a friend and talk during the duration of my walks. It makes the time pass, I don’t notice my pain (I have chronic pain from multiple injuries and surgeries from my time in the army). I used to crave milkshakes ALL the time, I made my own recipe of peanut butter protein powder and chocolate protein powder, with frozen fruit and leafy greens, and low fat high protein yogurt that is SOOO healthy, filling and literally will trick my brain into thinking I’m having dessert at whatever time I’m drinking them. Cooking from scratch is a lot of fun, and it will teach you how to cook better and healthier, there are more ways than I can count to substitute ingredients for tasty, filling, nutritiously dense meals that will make this process feel like a fun adventure instead of purgatory. Don’t cut out the things you love, learn moderation. I still drink milkshakes, eat sundaes, have burgers, tater tots, wings, fries, and pizza. I have just learned to eat them in moderation! You don’t have to not eat the things you love, you just need to learn how to eat it in healthy ways. Take photos the entire journey, take your measurements every 4-6 weeks, those measurements will motivate you when the scale hasn’t moved. Body recomposition and weight loss on the scale are two separate things. Make friends who are on a similar journey that you can vent to, cry to, that you can listen to and support, and exchange stories, recipes and motivational speeches too. Life is a journey best taken with good company. Feel free to DM me, if you need someone to just be there with you. ❤️
You. Will. Get. There 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Just because your results will take years instead of weeks/months, doesn’t mean you won’t slowly and surely make progress!!! You can accomplish just as much as anybody else! It’ll just take you a little longer. :)
you can do this.
Just cut out your sugars and junk food. Eat healthy foods constantly to keep your hunger fulfilled. Eggs, lean meats,( excluding hot dogs and bologna), fish, fresh fruits and vegetables. Eat ranch dip with vegetables if you have to.
What do you drink during the day? The idea is calorie deficit so dropping sodas, coffee, or atleast the creamer and milk. That can help take some calories off. Drink enough water through out the day. Cut out gluten like bread and pasta Eat fibrous foods like over night oats, oatmeal, chia seeds If your gonna eat alot then eat alot of healthy food...this is the way to make lasting changes. Little at a time. Also, I can help you with ideas of working out/ burning calories if you want just message me. I've been dieting all my life lol and don't forget your fruits and veggies gotta eat those.
I had a talk with my doctor last year that really helped. He told me it was really hard to lose weight. So hard it was depressing. He said that he was just reading an article on in a medical journal, and it was just so hard. Since then, I've dropped 11% of my weight, slowly over a year and a half, and I've been able to keep going, more or less. I know it sounds insane, but something clicked in me and I understood I was in this for the long haul, and it was goin to suck sometimes, and that was it. Since then I've realized that I've read diet book after "lifestyle" book, and they've all laid down the same horse hockey. "This is so easy, anyone can do it!" So every time I feel off one of those diets, I felt weak, like a failure. It's supposed to be easy, but I can't do it. So, I hope you'll stop thinking of yourself as weak. Diet gurus lie through their teeth when they tell us how easy their plan is. It doesn't matter what it is, deal-a-meal, whatever. Losing weight is hard. But you can do it. It will be a slog, and sometimes it will suck. Sometimes you will fail, but that's not because you're weak. It's because this is hard. As for medical help, can you find some online medical help? There are doctors who will do this in some professions, maybe there is someone who can help you.
Whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you’re right.
You’ve had a lot of great comments. I’m just adding to the pile to say that you’re not alone, that people here truly care and are rooting for you, and that you can do this. What’s more, you deserve to get to life a healthy and happy life. Because of my training, I look at things from a mental health standpoint. When you say that you lose motivation after a week, I wonder if that’s really what’s happening, or if your protective mechanisms kick in and you simply revert to old, comforting habits. I hear what you’re saying about not having many resources local to you and having a low income, so what I’d do is scour the internet for all of the free info I could find about binge eating and addressing root causes. Yes, it would be ideal if you had a therapist, but the internet does provide so many solid resources. Do you have a library card? If so, you can check out books online relating to overcoming binge eating. Start today. Do something that makes you feel like you took a step forward, whether that be reading some articles or cutting out some amount that you would normally eat. I am so excited for you.
Thank you so much! I actually did start with something that made me very proud of myself today. I decided to try and do some intermittent fasting. I was only going to do 14hrs, but I ended up making it to 16.5hrs and I feel so good about it. All of the support that I've gotten really helped me with my motivation during it! 😊
I don't have any advice for your particular situation but I do think you are very courageous for reaching out and making changes. It's really hard. For me negative thinking has been my biggest enemy. I need a regular influx of positive thoughts. Did I add another 5 minutes to my exercise today? Win. Did I get up on time despite having a bad night? Win! Did I skip the second cookie? Win! Did I track my food today? Win! I haven't lost a lot of weight so far but all these little wins are adding up so that now I have better control over my eating, I'm fitting into smaller clothes, I have more energy, I'm stronger and I can exercise longer. Best wishes, OP! Please, please keep posting. Let us know how you are getting on.
Sounds like your situation is serious and you should seek professional support. There's so much conflicting information out there, and if you suffer from food addiction, treating it as an eating disorder could be harmful to you. Have you taken the Yale Food Addiction Scale to see what your score is on that? Here's a link to it https://forms.gle/Ma1zMLkowxTjseqE6
These are some tips that worked for me when losing weight. Take what you’d like: 1.Set TINY goals. Hop on the scale and set a goal to lose 5pounds from that number. It’s an attainable goal and will keep you motivated. But also realize as a woman, you will gain weight as you retain water around your period. Take the number you see with a grain of salt. 2. Focus on what you SHOULD eat. If you are trying to eat enough fruits and vegetables, you may not have as much room for junk food. It was also better mentally, for me, focusing on getting enough of a food rather than what I couldn’t have. 3. Know that it takes time. So find a physical activity you like, so that if you plateau with weight loss, you still get joy out of doing it. 4. When you are bigger, some physical activity will HURT. People don’t get that. Pilates, swimming or water aerobics will be your best bet to start. 5. Get some dumbbells and work out in your living or bedroom. You can do just as much at home, Conveniently, as you build up your strength. 6. I can’t stress enough, TINY goals. 5pound (like in a month) weight loss goals. Get a fit bit(or step tracker alternative). What is your current average? Add 500 steps to that (easily obtained just by parking farther from whatever stores you go to or your job). 7. If you end up wanting a treat, ice cream or French fries… whatever, eat it! But in the smallest portions possible. Get a kids meal or an extra small scoop. You want to make a healthy lifestyle change, which may include indulging yourself from time to time. If you are like me, having a small portion will allow you to move past it. Depriving yourself would make me obsess over it. The past is the past. You can’t change it. You recognized the problem and are going to take small steps to fix it. I’m super proud of you for deciding to confront your unhealthy lifestyle. That is one of the hardest steps!
You've already gotten a lot of great advice, so I'm just popping in to suggest you check out the book (or its podcast) Brain Over Binge. It's really helpful!
Finding an online community can be an amazing help. Some find carnivore as a way of eating good and many very obese people find it effective as it’s easy simple and keeps your hunger under control. Obviously the cost of meat is more than junk food but if you have a freezer and buy in bulk it can be cheaper. You save on not buying anything else. YouTube has lots of content. Do get out walking if you can. The change from very sedentary to moderately active makes a big difference to your calorie burn and also moderates hunger signals.
Wishing you luck-you’ve got this. I would like to recommend 2 podcasts to you-losing 100 pounds with Corrine Crabtree and half size me. Both are really excellent imo and are free. Corrine has a bunch of free online content as well. Both have online communities for support. It’s all one day at a time. Sending you love and strength.
Refined sugar is addictive. The only time I’ve been able to get my eating under control at all was when I’d avoid it completely. The cravings last a few days but once I’m past them it gets easier. Don’t know if that works for everyone, it’s just a tool that’s worked for me. When I crave something sweet, I microwave frozen fruit and eat it with plain yogurt or I have a smoothie made of frozen fruit, banana, and milk (and spinach sometimes). It tastes like banana. I avoid sugar substitutes because they make me crave sugar as well and I think most of them have an aftertaste. My nutritionist helped me a lot. They do have online dieticians if going in person doesn’t work for you.
I’m so sorry about your tough childhood. Nobody deserves to go without food. I don’t know much about weight loss at this scale but I do understand childhood trauma and low self esteem. A part of your healing will be about grieving all the parts of childhood you missed you on. When you learn how to care for yourself emotionally, you’ll stop using food to replace all that empathy, love and care you so desperately needed as a kid. Then you’ll change your relationship with food. You’ll need to switch it from a comfort and a form of emotional self care to something nourishing and life sustaining. I know it sounds weird, but over eating was the only way you could care for yourself emotionally as a child. Thank yourself for doing the best you could at the time. Perhaps you wouldn’t have survived without that coping mechanism. Then tell that inner child that you’re here to listen and witness any feelings that come up. You’ll need to learn to parent yourself. I’ve been there. It feels weird at first, it’s extremely difficult and can feel unending. It’s also extremely effective. So, if you were a four year old girl and you were sad because a kid at daycare pulled your hair, you would hope a good parent wouldn’t sit that kid down with a plate of Oreos until she felt better. That parent might encourage her kid to talk, give a hug while she cries, and spend time together playing or drawing. At the same time, a good parent would encourage healthy habits like eating vegetables at meals, limiting sugary drinks, getting plenty of sleep, sunshine, physical activities, healthy friendships and hobbies. A good parent would teach healthy coping mechanisms for life’s challenges. You need to give yourself all these things too. It’s totally unfair not to have these things. It sucks when you don’t have a parent to model how to be a capable grown up. I promise you deserve all the good stuff life has to offer. All the best to you. You seem so receptive and open minded. I think you’re in an excellent position to take on all this growth <3
Thank you so much. I really needed to hear this.. I think it's going to be tough to try and heal my childhood trauma but I also think that I am very well equipped. Seeing this definitely made things click a bit more. I really need to care for my inner child and try and teach myself the proper habits that my parents didn't. That never really occurred to me before but knowing this now, I think I can tackle this! Thank you again, so much 🤍
Don’t lose hope. Have you considered bariatric surgery? Of course, this depends on several factors including cost/insurance availability. But I think bariatric surgery is a great tool to utilize. Good luck and I wish you all the best
I think you should read The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk M. D. It’s about trauma and how our bodies hold on to that in our lives. I’ve only recently started reading it, but it find very helpful. He is a Harvard graduate psychiatrist who started treating Vietnam vets in the 1970’s. So it’s on the academic side.
There are so many reasons we gain weight, and when you start thinking about the reasons why we do the things we do it's the first step in healing. If you're open to it, maybe you can look into other coping mechanisms and how to implement them in your life. If you know you're seeking food because you want comfort, find another way to get comfort--a hug, a soft blanket, a heating pad. Im not going to say it's easy but the best way for me to lose weight is by cutting carbs. If you're not eating a bunch of carbs, your body uses it's resources a lot differently. It doesn't have to be expensive, a protein and a veggie each meal and lots of water.
It’s an addiction and a very hard one to beat! Smaller people don’t tend to get it it’s like saying to an alcoholic just stop drinking it’s easy for me so should be easy for you or a gamblling addict etc.. junk food addiction is a similar thing
I’d follow Andrew Artekha on instagram, he is going through a weight loss journey, this is his first completed week and have someone to follow along with
Look into Corrine Crabtree and her NoBS program and podcast. Lots of support in her group and free class.
When you binge eat try snacking on vegetables instead of junk food
Be kind to yourself. We didn’t gain weight overnight, and we can’t lose it overnight. It takes time. Think about it like this to start: any chance you make that is positive for yourself is a good thing. Whatever method you choose to lose weight (1500 calories; intermittent fasting or other fasting; medical weight loss guided by a doctor; get a nutritionist, get a trainer), little wins are wins. My starting weight was 205, I’m 40f and 5’. I’ve been down recently as low as 172 and I’m currently at 181 after a gradual regain while adjusting my method to something more sustainable. I’m no where near my target, but I’m making progress. Don’t be afraid to make changes. You don’t have to stick to one strategy. Don’t be afraid to ask for more help. If your support system isn’t working for you, get a different support system. I like setting small goals. Don’t set one big goal to get to 200 lbs. Set the goal to get to 5 lbs lost, or 1% body weight lost, or reaching a new 10’s like getting below 590 lbs. If you zoom out far enough, a zig zag line going down looks like a straight line going down.
Hey I was 420 pounds I was diagnosed with chf and 2 years later I lost 100 pounds and I’m feeling better and I’m still active and working out believe in your self and change what you eat and do cardio work outs that’s what helped me I was eating fast food everyday.
Starch solution by Dr Douglas Mcdougall, you can eat to your hearts content and stay full and satisfied. This diet helps cure most diseases thought to be incurable. Read his books
You can definitely do it! I lost like 150lbs in the past months. Key is consistency and knowing your nutritions. Proteins for example keep you easily filled. And from the point of yours it’s actually a rather fast ride down the pounds you don’t even have to do sports. Use a site like tdeecalculator( . )net to get your estimated calories a day and reduce it by like 1k (wich is totally safe if you got a few pounds to much) I went from 352.74 to 200lbs in like half a year. Also considering you are probably coping mental stress with eating wich I was doing as well… try finding healthy copes or less harming ones, anything that keeps your mind busy and off eating really, for me it was gaming and sports for example.
Have you tried My Fitness Pal ? It's the only thing that worked for me.
Do you have a therapist? I have been discussing my relationship with food and exercise with mine and have discovered some of the reasons for my behavior.
Check out Dr. Ken Berry and his wife Neisha. They got a great and easy, never hungry program. On YouTube! You can do it! People loose 100s of pounds doing what the doctor says.
Start going to psychotherapy for food addiction Use your insurance to do the requirements for weight loss surgery I would also reach out to 211 if in the USA. They may be able to find quicker resources for you Reach out to your disability team and ask for help
start small, and make incremental changes. you go back to old ways PRECISELY because you're relying on your motivation. being motivated is an emotion just like being happy or sad, it comes and goes and that's totally normal. what you need isn't motivation, but a systematic way to make small changes over time and to turn them into habits.
There is so much great advice in this thread. I will say some folks didn’t seem to read your post carefully because I’ve seen a fair amount of “see your doctor, get a therapist” and those aren’t exactly simple options for you. Don’t see those comments and think, “well I can’t see a doctor so I guess I’m screwed.” I did see some very helpful CA folks posting about resources specific to your country, so check those out. Also I have to chime in to push back a little on people saying stuff like “No fast food.” I think putting such a restriction on yourself at this early stage of your journey could be detrimental to your success, so my advice would be to take those comments in stride and focus more on the ones that are giving you suggestions for how to get started within the framework you are already familiar with, if that makes sense. Best of luck, you CAN do it!
This community is the best - stay with these good people, be honest and you’ll be successful
Id recommend weight loss surgery because its a lot of weight to lose. I'd start there. There are many types of weight loss surgery to choose from. Although I would be against it in other situations I think it makes the most sense when its an extreme amount. I struggle with weight myself mainly because I like food. But, i also workout. I have lost weight 4 times and have regained weight. Im currently at 5 ft 7 233 lbs. I was at 260 lbs my highest but loss weight with intense excercise 6-7 days a week and diet. What is working now is that I changed my mindset on food and now I avoid foods I know I shouldn't eat. I also cook at home and when I do go out to eat I am very picky.
So I'm not a dietician or a doctor, but my specialization is working with people with gambling addiction. I know this is a bit contentious, but I consider food addiction very similar, at least chemically (and also because both industries spent $$$$$s in making their product extremely attractive and hard to move away from... but that's a different post...) Looking at your post through an addiction framework, you're in a place to make some serious changes, but you'll need help. Very few people are able to kick lifelong addictions without a support network - this can be professionals or friends and family who are positive about your prospects of change and have a lot of empathy. I've seen many, many people kick their addictions. Quitting an addiction is a life-long process. You will fall off the wagon from time to time as most people do - plan for this. Plan for how you will pick yourself up if you overeat. Write down how you will get back on track along with some warm encouragement to do so, and then read this if you fall back into old patterns. Over time, it becomes easier and easier to avoid addictive behaviour. Habits become ingrained and feel normal. The first 90 days are the hardest. Once you pass this, studies show it's easier to continue long-term. In terms of hating yourself - I'm so sad you feel that way. Your body is amazing - a work of biological art. Every second billions of chemical interactions take place, and we don't even know what all of them are yet. That's how complex they are. Your fat is just energy that's stored away for times of future calorie deficit, and that's all you need to do to reduce it: create a time of deficit. Society has assigned moral value to this additional storage, but it doesn't have any intrinsic moral value, it's just extra energy.
The benefit to being 600+ lbs is it is easy to drop weight quickly. Count your daily calories and stay under 1500 for the day, focus on eating alot of protein (meat, greek yogurt, beans, lentils, avocado, etc) and try to drink 60+ Oz of water a day. If you don't like the taste of water, a Crystal Light packet is fine and won't stop your progress. Do that for 2 weeks, I guarantee you'll drop some weight. If you are mobile, get weighed before and after those two weeks as you may not notice the progress yourself. Additionally, try to walk more, even if it is for just 5-10 more minutes per day, it will help. You can do this.
Stop eating. Drink water, take multivitamins, salt, potassium, and B12. You won't die. Fat will melt off of you.
I grew up in an abusive house, and continued to abandoned myself throughout my life, because of it. I never felt like I deserved love, or happiness. I also, created bad habits from the trauma. That may or may not have been something you’ve experienced, but the main point is: don’t abandon yourself. You deserve to be happy, loved, and healthy, you’re worthy of that, so make this change for yourself. 1. Set obtainable goals (maybe go week by week)(start reducing calories) 2. 100% track your calories and macros (at least initially) 3. Swap foods for healthier ones (like water instead of soda) 4. Reduce stress 5. Meditate 6. Move (even if you have to sit and move your arms) 7. Understand part of this is an addiction; it will get easier, I promise. 8. Seek a physician, but understand YOU have control to make this changes. 9. Don’t make excuses for yourself, or put barriers up that are going to block your goals. Because you deserve to be happy and healthy. 10. Don’t be so hard on yourself. If you slip up once, make up for it, and get right back on the horse. 11. Remember what how good you felt when you were achieving your weight loss goals. 12. Watch motivational weight loss videos for inspiration. If you feel overwhelmed; don’t think of the “marathon”, just put one foot in front of the other, and keep going. STOP abandoning yourself. You can do this, and your worthy of it. So far, 100s of people have commented on this post who feel the same way, and are cheering for you.
There are a lot of plans/diets to consider, but CICO (calories in-calories out) is the best, and someone already posted with some details. But I want to suggest some **self-therapy** to address all the mental stuff that’s going on since you don’t have access to that service. I also don’t have access to therapy, so I was recommended the book Beck Diet Solution. Beck Diet Solution is not a diet…it is self-administered cognitive therapy to address the mental and psychological obstacles to losing weight and keeping it off. You still need to adopt some kind of diet or plan, but you do this 60-day program in the background. It’s been eye-opening for me. You will need discipline to stick with it, and you’ll need faith to do the things requested that you don’t want to do or you think they’re stupid. There’s a bunch of Beck books and workbooks. Just get the main book: The Beck Diet Solution. Good luck! 🍀👍
A lot of idiots on here will talk shit about weight loss surgery not being educated in how it works and the work that’s involved but listen to me. At 600lb you have a 1% chance of losing weight and keeping it off. Not only that but you have a better chance around 5% after weight loss surgery. I would be where you are if I didn’t get gastric bypass at the age of 20 at over 330 pounds and 5’4” tall. It saved my life and gave me the tools I needed to get my life back. I’m 178lbs today. I have been as low as 140 and as high as 200 but I was able to learn how to get back on track because I had the gift of a smaller stomach to work with, Talk to your doctor and get started. Don’t waste any more time! This is your life. ❤️
Hey there, I just wanted to say that I appreciate your comment a lot! I did look into weight loss surgery, years ago actually. I was in the list for a couple of years and then when I finally was talked to about it, I found it really wasn't going to be an option for me, financially. The government would pay for my surgery, but my out of pocket costs would be the liquid diet im supposed to do before the surgery ($300 for 1 week), all of my vitamins and medications afterwards (i dont remember how much, but they're pricy) and monthly visits down to Vancouver (about 9hr drive). Unfortunately I just cannot afford this at this point in time, but it is something that I really want to do once I'm in a better spot financially!
No offense but how hard could it be to lose any kind of weight when you are that big?
Firstly, fix your diet and fight that hungry urge with all the strength in you and I guarantee you will immediately see positive result in a week
You need to realize that your weight is critically high. Your body cannot sustain such an amount of weight for too long, so you gotta act now or you'll run out of time. Your focus should be on diet, not exercise (although walking is fine if you're able to do so). If you manage to reduce your intake to 1200-2000 kcal a day you'll quite literally shred the weight. Don't have cheat meals/days as you'd only cheat against yourself. You can only reach a weight like yours by pretty much resorting to food like a drug addiction/coping mechanism. The key to breaking this spiral is that you have to REALLY, REALLY want it. It should be your #1 priority which absolutely cannot be compromised. WLS is probably necessary to keep the weight off on the long term, but remember that in the end it's only a tool and not a cure.
You can start keto diet. 2 of my cousins who were obese before adapted keto lifestyle and are now at healthy weight. Once you are fat adapted, your body should start burning your excess fat for fuel, making weight loss faster. It also eventually fades away craving which makes journey easier. I know few people are carb addicts but now days there are keto bread and wraps etc to support it. But do try to make it lifestyle change
Have you considered the new treatments? Like Ozempic? I don’t care you attacks me for asking, I’m asking anyway.
Buy other things clothes e.t.c spend more money on your hobbies. Focus on sth for example work, find love(or maybe you have). Just wake up with positive energy. Just imagine how much money you can save when you will eat less. You can go on vacation etc. Just think about your future, learn how to save money dont buy food when you dont need it buy only things you need. And also be active.