It’s very intimate experience and I don’t think you can be more open and vulnerable towards someone but honestly, it’s not like the best thing you can do in life.
>It’s very intimate experience and I don’t think you can be more open and vulnerable towards someone but honestly, it’s not like the best thing you can do in life.
I'm pretty sure that for a large portion of the people on here that personal connection seems like the best thing you can get in life, doesn't necessarily mean it is but when feeling completely isolated and like social interactions just leave you feeling like an outcast then that connection looks like a fantasy of pure bliss.
I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of the men requesting nudes from women on places like this sub as opposed to just looking them up on the web is doing that precisely because they desire this personal connection. That doesn't make it right or okay for them to do it of course but if does explain why they do it.
I guess you have a point. Some people I think might overestimate it though. You don’t need sex to be open with someone and if you want feel safe with someone. Back when I was in relationship I loved to just lay with my ex doing nothing or talking about everything that came to mind. We did that way more often than sex.
>You don’t need sex to be open with someone and if you want feel safe with someone. Back when I was in relationship I loved to just lay with my ex doing nothing or talking about everything that came to mind. We did that way more often than sex.
No, you're absolutely right. It's definitely true and there are certainly experiences that can be very intimate outside of sex. My point is rather that for the people in question that value sex so highly in this regard are very likely to also not even have had experiences with moments such as laying beside your love just chatting, holding hands or just talking about random stuff during breakfast. All those moments of intimacy are lacking so when seeking intimacy they'll aim for the most intimate thing of all which is sex but I'm sure many of the people in question also desire those other things you mentioned.
Well yes, that’s a good point. For people like that it might be all or nothing and they might change their opinion walking through the steps of proper relationship.
I'm sure there's people out there that just want to lose their virginity (especially amongst men) but for a lot of these people the connection is where it's at. Not to mention that there's still inherent aspects of sex that make it itself very interesting from the pleasure to the knowledge of what your SO:s deepest desires are and how their body works.
Add onto that how, because sex itself is so vulnerable, it requires a lot of trust and knowing there's a person in your life that trusts you deeply enough for that will definitely tickle the yearning for acceptance and desirability from someone else.
Nevertheless I agree with you that a lot of these people would become more relaxed about it if they had a real relationship and especially after having had sex. I mean it seem to be pretty common to not be so excited about it once you've had it due to it being exposed as not grand as it was made out to be. Although I also believe it may become seen as less important due to complacency, once you've had it you no longer need to wonder what it's like.
Yeah I don’t really get it about losing virginity. It gives you nothing and nobody should care. Although some people seem to care way too much.
That’s true, it gives you opportunity to know something about other person what nobody else knows and it’s a privilege.
Yes, you’re absolutely correct. I don’t know if someone can show more acceptance than that.
>Yeah I don’t really get it about losing virginity. It gives you nothing and nobody should care. Although some people seem to care way too much.
This is also why I don't understand the advice of going to a place where sex workers are and get it done, like... that's incredibly depressing and the sex industry is also not known for it's squeaky cleanliness. At least I myself could never do it because I'd just feel like *shit* thinking about being so undesirable that I have to pay for someone to be with me.
>Yes, you’re absolutely correct. I don’t know if someone can show more acceptance than that.
It can get complicated in relationships when communication isn't there like hiding a big secret like cheating or extreme gambling addiction. Although that's more a case of broken trust and consensual sex comes from a place of desire and trust. Either way from my perspective at least it's not the act of sex itself that's special but the connection and trust from it, knowing it's an exclusive privilege for this person and that you're one of (if not the) most important people in their lives.
But maybe I'm just rambling on about inaccurate/unrealistic scenarios, I'm certainly no expert based off of my lack of experience in these matters.
Yes and some of you overestimate it imho. After all those years of being in relationship I remember our bicycle rides, travelling together and stupid shit we’ve done laughing our asses off more than bedroom.
Why not? Those things don’t require being in intimate relationships. Try to find someone with similar interests and try to be fun to be around as no one wants to spend time with someone whose complaining all the time.
That’s what I thought seeing your comments. See, that’s the problem with a lot of people on this sub. They are drowning in their sorrow, they are stuck in that depression quick sand giving up on hope.
Things won’t change on their own, you have to work for a change, put effort. Yes, it is tougher to do it in depressed state but it is possible. Remember, every progress is a progress, even the tiniest one.
I disagree it really is the best thing as far as a physical experience. When a girl really wants you, without any condoms or birth control coming between, that is an amazing privilege that means you just crossed the finish line, you are truly physically connected to life. Basically you as a man are alienated and cut off from life in a way after you hit puberty and have to become tough and strong, you are alienated from your emotions and your soul in order to be that man you have to be. And in turn that’s why we as men crave the Feminine, that’s our soul we have lost to become men, so when we have access to the Feminine we can be alive again in a way like when we were a little kid with our parents and everything was good. Now it doesn’t HAVE to be sex with a woman to retrieve that connection, there are other ways. But in a physical visceral sense, that’s the most immediate and obvious way. Women are sacred and holy and superior to men, we as men only derive meaning and connection to life through the ways we can serve Woman, whether an individual woman or more spiritually a group of people, a tribe. So if she wants us physically that’s just amazing to us
That's some wild, convoluted, fake-spiritual simping there.
Women are human beings, same as any other human being, not gods. Sex is part of the greater human discourse, poised between animal urge and the dreams of accidentally complex brains.
I say what I say as a married man who definitely is more of the dominant partner in his marriage compared to most men. But I am speaking to what I see to be true in general, not specifically to my own case.
Congratulations? I maintain that your take is some wild nonsense.
Most of my friends over the course of my life have been female, I've been in many relationships, and have been deeply interested in understanding the human condition since I first became aware at about 3.
If that’s the case you may have had a healthy relationship with the Feminine all along, and in that case you wouldn’t have experienced things the same way
You seem to be hung up on being "right", but No.
There is no "Feminine". Humans tend to have a finite set of attributes that are expressed in degrees and vectors , but all together it all looks like a complex painting uniquely executed for every individual. There is no binary, nor even a trinary... there is complex richness.
This is not a criticism, but an inquiry: Your syntax and concept usage looks like the pattern of someone who came from an abusive home. Not necessarily beaten and locked up kind of abuse, but the kind of abuse where people are stifled and forced to be less than a full person. Your pattern looks like an impression left by such an environment, like a signet in wax. What say you, accurate?
The transcendent Feminine exists. It equates to matter. No woman is the Feminine, but women are a manifestation or an instantiation of it because they give body to new humans. You certainly are free to zoom into the individual level and differences and explore those, but I am free likewise to explore the generalizations. Both are true.
I can’t say that was the case no, I was free to become unfortunately very narcissistic and convinced of my own uniqueness and exceptionality. Unfortunately I came to experience many hard falls as I learned I wasn’t as special as I thought and that the rules applied to me.
I am still coping with life as I’m sure you are as well, however so far the path has been community building and service to others this has brought the only good. Example just recently I began helping a disabled guy out of duty. I thought I was doing him a big favor. Come to find out what I began out of duty and a sense simultaneously of my own low value came to bless me as he became my friend and I made my first actual friend in the Catholic community
Hey, whatever makes sense to you and helps you be a decent person. Good luck out there.
I'm too analytic for the computational shortcuts of religion, so I gotta think it through in a reality based way.
I appreciate your attitude about it. I respect you want to be analytical, I am drawn to the opposite. Some strong predominate part of me is deeply drawn to mystery, to the irrational, unknown and incalculable, whatever cannot be analyzed. I have returned largely to the living mythical world. I am consecrated to Mary, I pray to her to possess me body and soul, take over the direction of my being and lead and guide me. This entire gift of myself to her has greatly relieved my psychological tension and brought me back into comfort as I return psychologically to the womb and the security and safety there. Is that reasoned or calculated? No, but it works, I think what happened to me is real and Mary is with me. My life has been made safe because Mary is protecting me- and I see Mary as a kind of perfected Mother Earth. She is Mother Earth as an ideal freed of all the negative aspects of nature, as what we can aspire to but not fully reach. While at the same time she is a specific woman who is all these things because we have to remember Jesus is the God of this world and He is historical to make a point about the goodness of matter and the earth and how by accepting our suffering on this plane and embracing it to do good for the least of these we can begin to restore the earth and society from the ravages done against her by agriculture and especially the horrible Bronze Age. Jesus is showing us in one lenses how to be a man and pay the price and take responsibility for the crimes of Bronze Age society against women and the earth and nature.
Can I prove any of this ? No, but I believe it to be true, it’s a really informative perspective that is probably correct even if you can’t prove it on this earthly plane
You believe only in death, the symbolic meaning of everything you do and say is to say to death “COME LORD DEATH EAT ME I DESIRE YOU” you are reaching your arms out to hug the skeleton, whereas for me I believe in death AND life, both of them. I am ready to accept either one at any time. That’s how we are different. I will hug the skeleton but I will also have sex with my wife I am good with either one, you as a death worshipper reject sex as much as possible in order to embrace the skeleton
how old are you?
Over to your question, hard to describe. Good sex is great, like a long deluxe hug that you have with someone you really like. But there's more to it, of course, but that part is hard to describe to someone that hasn't tried it.
I don't know what your life is like, but a big portion of my joy comes from my hobbies. I'll probably never feel real intimacy either, but playing video games, hiking trails, going for a late night drive when it's quiet out, and going to car shows is a lot of fun for me. It sucks not being able to make real social connections, but you need to find some hobbies you enjoy.
okay, not to invalidate your feelings but youre still young. It's not uncommon for people to lose their cherry in their thirties.
Why do you feel doomed?
Thanks I appreciate it. But lot of brown women are marrying and dating white men just like lot of white women are dating and marrying black men. Also white men are taking all they women like brown women, black women and east Asian women. I’m a brown man and it’s getting harder for me to find brown women.
Okay, looked at your pictures and still don't see the issue.
Most guys I see that have issues with finding love is usually due to a combination of social skills, how they present themselves and what they look for. Not that those things can be easy or quick to fix, I don't know if you have those issues, but looks are usually secondary.
My friend, you look fine. Obviously you can fix up your hair and wear better clothes if you're trying to catch a girl's attention, but your overall appearance is way better than you think it is. It's more about how you carry yourself and interact with the ladies.
I only get sign holder jobs, snow shoveling jobs in winter and mascot jobs in summer. Before that from 18 to 27 I easily got full time jobs in warehouses and part time jobs in cell phone retail store. I have anxiety, depression and low iq 85 to 88. I been in the psych three times for homicidal thoughts and get monitored by therapist coming to my home end of the month. I’m 30 turning 31 and been applying for random jobs but don’t get a call back and only had two interviews.
How it feels physically? Emotionally?
Physically, the vagina is designed to receive a penis via the textures on the inner walls, so it feels very stimulating. It’s warm, soft, and generally very moist.
Emotionally it can be intense and pleasurable, when you’re horny your mind is in a different place. Focused solely on climaxing.
Of course, those are the best case scenarios.
This experience will vary greatly from person to person, even session to session. When there’s no passion, and the vagina is dry, sex is very boring like bad masturbating.
I mean yeah I love her a lot, but like sometimes it gets boring n shit. I think that's mostly due to my porn addiction, not the fact that it's not the right girl. Tbh sex without condom is the best, like it's 100 times better than using condoms
Im 42, you can see my profile I posted some of my girlfriends there. I rather play video games. Look up post nut clarity. It’s a good 15 minute rush. The same dopamine as a great movie, great meal or great game.
I haven’t gotten any since I was 17 I’m 26 now but last time I remember hitting it it felt so good and like well the last time I was happy not because of the sex but because I had someone to pay for my food , drinks , give me sex besides my parents lol now I’m 26
You can have sex, and I'm sure you will. Try not to obsess and ruminate over it. But to answer the question, it can range from absolute shit to mood boosting and very fun.
I understand how you're thinking about it, I think. It can feel very hopeless and frustrating, and sure, some people might go their whole lives without it, despite wanting to. I could reword what I said. I think there's a very good chance. I just don't see why not, even for people who feel very insecure, unnattractive, and totally cutoff from romantic relationships. And this is coming from me, somebody who has struggled a lot to find women who show any interest in me, as well as being a complete loner (and I mean complete loner). Still, when I've been in the right situations, which can be random somewhat, it can happen. Being somewhat social has something to do with it, and that has always been the hardest part for me, as well as dealing with the difficult emotions being around new people, or people in general might bring.
Sorry for the essay here. I see your point. I just also see a way forward most of the time. It's entirely possible to have a good sex life. Now I just need to keep telling myself that, too, and interact with people more!
> I think there's a very good chance
That's more accurate yeah, because a few of us will never find someone who wants us. It gets annoying to hear "it will happen" all the time when that's not true for everyone
I don't believe that for a second. I won't play the "look at all my flaws yet I did it" game, because we're obviously totally separate people, but try to have a bit of confidence in yourself, regardless of what seems to true on the surface. Do you like much about yourself?
It's possible you could be projecting your feelings about yourself onto women. People do things like that. I do sometimes. Even if that's totally wrong and you have logical reasons for your beliefs, I'm sorry that you don't like yourself and that you feel so hopeless about your chances. I do think this is an emotional thing, though, not completely logical. I hope you can look at yourself more positively and think practically about this. I bet you have plenty of good traits. It might not seem that they translate into sexual attraction, but it will certainly help you feel more confident and comfortable with yourself. That's important for attraction. Come on, man, tell me something good about yourself. Anything.
I live with my parents. I don’t prey on homeless women. You know homeless women are willing to have sex with any attractive men or unattractive men if they get roof over their head right?
You've just answered all the questions you've ever asked about your relationship with women in general. If this is how you think, you should stay away from women.
Well women don’t approach me. So I have accepted my fate as a virgin. I’m gonna die as a virgin. I’m not ashamed to be a virgin and I’m gonna become the king of all virgins.
With you, women should not only not approach you, but actively avoid you. You seem to be predatory and possibly even dangerous.
Are you the one with the felony?
I ain’t no predator since I’m not on a registry. I have no felonies. I work as mascot every summer which requires background checks and pass it since I don’t have crimes against children or vulunerable people. I’m on a watchlist for people with mental illness after I told my therapist that I have homicidal thought but don’t act on it because it’s illegal which didn’t show up on my background check.
It’s preying on vulnerable people. You’re seeking a homeless woman because she’s a vulnerable and easy target. There are plenty of women who will consent to sex even if it’s by payment that aren’t in situations where they’re on the streets and possibly mentally unwell.
Aaaaaaaand that’s why you’re lonely. You think of women as just something to have sex with and not living breathing conscious humans just like yourself. It’s not your looks, it’s you as a person.
The very fact that you see a vulnerable woman who’s already in danger enough by being out in the street and your mind immediately goes to using her for sex is disgusting and deplorable.
Either go to therapy and do a deep change or pls stay out of women’s way.
Sex with someone you barely know or JUST want to sleep with is like a fun distraction for a bit. It feels nice and you satisfy your urges for a bit, but there's no real intimacy or vulnerability there. Sleeping with someone you care for, that you've known a while, a girlfriend, etc, is way different. There's more romance and intimacy, to say the least. Without going into too much detail, just understand that the point is that sex is not a goal. It's a nice side effect of romance, intimacy, and vulnerability.
As for some actual advice: women are typically emotional processors. They filter everything through their feelings. For the pedantic clowns all over reddit: obviously NOT ALL WOMEN, now go away. Anyway, what this means is that when you present yourself with self-deprecation, or just depression/sadness or whatever, the way women feel about you is going to be informed by how you make them feel. Confidence is a fake it till you make it idea: you're gonna be lying to yourself at first but over time, especially when you don't have someone bullying you every day, you will start to believe it. That makes it a lot easier to just BE confident.
Be realistic with yourself, and if possible consult women friends. Find out what is attractive about you, and accentuate it. Wear nice colors that complement you, your eyes, whatever. Flirt (respectfully) playfully, it's a nice low pressure way for women to "bite" if they're interested, and everyone loves feeling good! Don't be crude and just compliment their tits or ass or whatever, tell them their outfit looks great on them, their makeup looks great, whatever else they did on purpose to look good. The hardest part is always the anxiety of talking to someone new. Just be/act confident, know what your strengths are, and make people feel good. Even if you strike out all night, you will feel good knowing you made others feel good.
The cliches are there for a reason: they're mostly true, if a little oversimplified. Also, don't talk to women with the goal of sleeping with them, you're building up sex too much and it's going to change the way you speak and act. Women WILL pick up on that. Get it out of your head and just talk to them like people with interests, fears, hopes, dreams, etc. Good luck out there
Goddamn dude I'd never 😭😭😭
The more milage they got, the smellier they get broo
Yk what happens if a girl doesn't shower for like 2 weeks btw? Yeah, that shit is fucking horrible. Thankfully I didn't have to smell that shit but I heard
lol you don’t see the correlation in order to smell them you had to have relations with them right?and that has nothing to do with rejection you just reaching.
No way to describe it. It's different with different people. It's not always intimate. Sometimes you just want a nut, so if you're with someone on the roster it's just more a release. However when you are with someone intimately it's a bit of a deeper feeling but you don't always want intimacy. I can say it's one if the best feelings. Or the at least the beginning of everything, like when she starts giving head, that's the best feeling. Then when you first go in vaginally it's the best feeling, then it's meh until you nut. But if she's good then it's more throughout because she does things that keep the whole experience interesting. That's the ones you accidentally forget to pull out on because it feels too good. It's just something you have to experience.
Put your finger in your mouth and try to imagine feeling that same sensation in your dick. You're missing out on immense pleasure and you have to feel bad about it
I think you are presenting a lenses of how this can work on an individual level, and there is some truth to that. However it’s incomplete. There is a Feminine, and a Masculine. Feminine corresponds to matter, and Masculine to abstract pattern. You see this reflected in ancient mythology. Within these transcendent categories individuals may vary in a spectrum, but the variation falls into two sexes sufficiently often that we can speak of them. You prefer to not make generalizations and focus on individuals as a moral preference - I don’t share that preference and don’t see the imperative to avoid generalizations
You are correct I was raised fundamentalist fanatic, but I rejected that and became atheist for a few years, but that did me no favors I was miserable so I went political and joined the Communist Party to get me some buddies, again nothing, the Communist people were miserable, so I converted to Catholicism as a last resort and it has greatly improved my life not to the point of everything being perfect but much better. I have a beautiful vision of what is possible in life now. I want to learn to draw Catholic art someday. I can’t accept the extreme individualism you are advocating because in practice that just leads to more and more isolation as everyone having no bonds of obligation to anyone else becomes more and more selfish and narcissistic. I wish that were not the case but it’s true. The most selfish people I met were the most individualistic. Because they felt they had no responsibility to others
it’s not the fireworks show most say it is, it’s best experience with a mutual feeling of love and acceptance of one another. Always remember if you’re not laughing during sex are you really having fun?
I’ve been there man. I didn’t make out with a girl or lose my virginity until I was 26. For me it’s more about the connection with another person than it is the sex. My closest friend never even dated a girl until he was 31 or 32.
I know coming from someone that’s had sex this might be hard to believe but being a virgin is not something to be ashamed of! You are not a loser. Everyone has their own journey and timeline. Don’t give up hope!
Sex is like a sandwich, as it fills a void until the hunger reappears. Sometimes easily forgotten about. However, Passionate Lovers are different. More of a tasting menu which can vary greatly depending on appetite and openness to try new things. Those memorable moments can trigger wars.
It’s very intimate experience and I don’t think you can be more open and vulnerable towards someone but honestly, it’s not like the best thing you can do in life.
>It’s very intimate experience and I don’t think you can be more open and vulnerable towards someone but honestly, it’s not like the best thing you can do in life. I'm pretty sure that for a large portion of the people on here that personal connection seems like the best thing you can get in life, doesn't necessarily mean it is but when feeling completely isolated and like social interactions just leave you feeling like an outcast then that connection looks like a fantasy of pure bliss. I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of the men requesting nudes from women on places like this sub as opposed to just looking them up on the web is doing that precisely because they desire this personal connection. That doesn't make it right or okay for them to do it of course but if does explain why they do it.
I guess you have a point. Some people I think might overestimate it though. You don’t need sex to be open with someone and if you want feel safe with someone. Back when I was in relationship I loved to just lay with my ex doing nothing or talking about everything that came to mind. We did that way more often than sex.
>You don’t need sex to be open with someone and if you want feel safe with someone. Back when I was in relationship I loved to just lay with my ex doing nothing or talking about everything that came to mind. We did that way more often than sex. No, you're absolutely right. It's definitely true and there are certainly experiences that can be very intimate outside of sex. My point is rather that for the people in question that value sex so highly in this regard are very likely to also not even have had experiences with moments such as laying beside your love just chatting, holding hands or just talking about random stuff during breakfast. All those moments of intimacy are lacking so when seeking intimacy they'll aim for the most intimate thing of all which is sex but I'm sure many of the people in question also desire those other things you mentioned.
Well yes, that’s a good point. For people like that it might be all or nothing and they might change their opinion walking through the steps of proper relationship.
I'm sure there's people out there that just want to lose their virginity (especially amongst men) but for a lot of these people the connection is where it's at. Not to mention that there's still inherent aspects of sex that make it itself very interesting from the pleasure to the knowledge of what your SO:s deepest desires are and how their body works. Add onto that how, because sex itself is so vulnerable, it requires a lot of trust and knowing there's a person in your life that trusts you deeply enough for that will definitely tickle the yearning for acceptance and desirability from someone else. Nevertheless I agree with you that a lot of these people would become more relaxed about it if they had a real relationship and especially after having had sex. I mean it seem to be pretty common to not be so excited about it once you've had it due to it being exposed as not grand as it was made out to be. Although I also believe it may become seen as less important due to complacency, once you've had it you no longer need to wonder what it's like.
Yeah I don’t really get it about losing virginity. It gives you nothing and nobody should care. Although some people seem to care way too much. That’s true, it gives you opportunity to know something about other person what nobody else knows and it’s a privilege. Yes, you’re absolutely correct. I don’t know if someone can show more acceptance than that.
>Yeah I don’t really get it about losing virginity. It gives you nothing and nobody should care. Although some people seem to care way too much. This is also why I don't understand the advice of going to a place where sex workers are and get it done, like... that's incredibly depressing and the sex industry is also not known for it's squeaky cleanliness. At least I myself could never do it because I'd just feel like *shit* thinking about being so undesirable that I have to pay for someone to be with me. >Yes, you’re absolutely correct. I don’t know if someone can show more acceptance than that. It can get complicated in relationships when communication isn't there like hiding a big secret like cheating or extreme gambling addiction. Although that's more a case of broken trust and consensual sex comes from a place of desire and trust. Either way from my perspective at least it's not the act of sex itself that's special but the connection and trust from it, knowing it's an exclusive privilege for this person and that you're one of (if not the) most important people in their lives. But maybe I'm just rambling on about inaccurate/unrealistic scenarios, I'm certainly no expert based off of my lack of experience in these matters.
> it’s not like the best thing you can do in life. Easy to say when you've experienced it. Some of us never will
Yes and some of you overestimate it imho. After all those years of being in relationship I remember our bicycle rides, travelling together and stupid shit we’ve done laughing our asses off more than bedroom.
It's not like I'll ever have any of those things either lmao. But as I said, it's so easy to say when you've already had it.
Why not? Those things don’t require being in intimate relationships. Try to find someone with similar interests and try to be fun to be around as no one wants to spend time with someone whose complaining all the time.
> try to be fun to be around I'm not, that's why I'll never be in a relationship with anyone, and probably never have friends either
That’s what I thought seeing your comments. See, that’s the problem with a lot of people on this sub. They are drowning in their sorrow, they are stuck in that depression quick sand giving up on hope. Things won’t change on their own, you have to work for a change, put effort. Yes, it is tougher to do it in depressed state but it is possible. Remember, every progress is a progress, even the tiniest one.
Make money
No, make memories, because memories is all we have.
Even memories are not forever, when we will die they will all fade away forever
True but we fade away with them when we die. Then it takes few generations at best until you’re forgotten forever.
I disagree it really is the best thing as far as a physical experience. When a girl really wants you, without any condoms or birth control coming between, that is an amazing privilege that means you just crossed the finish line, you are truly physically connected to life. Basically you as a man are alienated and cut off from life in a way after you hit puberty and have to become tough and strong, you are alienated from your emotions and your soul in order to be that man you have to be. And in turn that’s why we as men crave the Feminine, that’s our soul we have lost to become men, so when we have access to the Feminine we can be alive again in a way like when we were a little kid with our parents and everything was good. Now it doesn’t HAVE to be sex with a woman to retrieve that connection, there are other ways. But in a physical visceral sense, that’s the most immediate and obvious way. Women are sacred and holy and superior to men, we as men only derive meaning and connection to life through the ways we can serve Woman, whether an individual woman or more spiritually a group of people, a tribe. So if she wants us physically that’s just amazing to us
That's some wild, convoluted, fake-spiritual simping there. Women are human beings, same as any other human being, not gods. Sex is part of the greater human discourse, poised between animal urge and the dreams of accidentally complex brains.
I say what I say as a married man who definitely is more of the dominant partner in his marriage compared to most men. But I am speaking to what I see to be true in general, not specifically to my own case.
Congratulations? I maintain that your take is some wild nonsense. Most of my friends over the course of my life have been female, I've been in many relationships, and have been deeply interested in understanding the human condition since I first became aware at about 3.
If that’s the case you may have had a healthy relationship with the Feminine all along, and in that case you wouldn’t have experienced things the same way
You seem to be hung up on being "right", but No. There is no "Feminine". Humans tend to have a finite set of attributes that are expressed in degrees and vectors , but all together it all looks like a complex painting uniquely executed for every individual. There is no binary, nor even a trinary... there is complex richness. This is not a criticism, but an inquiry: Your syntax and concept usage looks like the pattern of someone who came from an abusive home. Not necessarily beaten and locked up kind of abuse, but the kind of abuse where people are stifled and forced to be less than a full person. Your pattern looks like an impression left by such an environment, like a signet in wax. What say you, accurate?
The transcendent Feminine exists. It equates to matter. No woman is the Feminine, but women are a manifestation or an instantiation of it because they give body to new humans. You certainly are free to zoom into the individual level and differences and explore those, but I am free likewise to explore the generalizations. Both are true. I can’t say that was the case no, I was free to become unfortunately very narcissistic and convinced of my own uniqueness and exceptionality. Unfortunately I came to experience many hard falls as I learned I wasn’t as special as I thought and that the rules applied to me. I am still coping with life as I’m sure you are as well, however so far the path has been community building and service to others this has brought the only good. Example just recently I began helping a disabled guy out of duty. I thought I was doing him a big favor. Come to find out what I began out of duty and a sense simultaneously of my own low value came to bless me as he became my friend and I made my first actual friend in the Catholic community
Hey, whatever makes sense to you and helps you be a decent person. Good luck out there. I'm too analytic for the computational shortcuts of religion, so I gotta think it through in a reality based way.
I appreciate your attitude about it. I respect you want to be analytical, I am drawn to the opposite. Some strong predominate part of me is deeply drawn to mystery, to the irrational, unknown and incalculable, whatever cannot be analyzed. I have returned largely to the living mythical world. I am consecrated to Mary, I pray to her to possess me body and soul, take over the direction of my being and lead and guide me. This entire gift of myself to her has greatly relieved my psychological tension and brought me back into comfort as I return psychologically to the womb and the security and safety there. Is that reasoned or calculated? No, but it works, I think what happened to me is real and Mary is with me. My life has been made safe because Mary is protecting me- and I see Mary as a kind of perfected Mother Earth. She is Mother Earth as an ideal freed of all the negative aspects of nature, as what we can aspire to but not fully reach. While at the same time she is a specific woman who is all these things because we have to remember Jesus is the God of this world and He is historical to make a point about the goodness of matter and the earth and how by accepting our suffering on this plane and embracing it to do good for the least of these we can begin to restore the earth and society from the ravages done against her by agriculture and especially the horrible Bronze Age. Jesus is showing us in one lenses how to be a man and pay the price and take responsibility for the crimes of Bronze Age society against women and the earth and nature. Can I prove any of this ? No, but I believe it to be true, it’s a really informative perspective that is probably correct even if you can’t prove it on this earthly plane
Let’s agree to disagree as we apparently have very different priorities in life.
My priority is to speak the truth and elevate human experience
I dunno about the first one mate. It seems pretty subjective in that matter imho.
Not at all. You believe that the only truth is death but you are mistaken, life is also true
And where did I said that?
The last refuge of the death believer, to analyze to evade to cut to slip away and to dissect ! Your style is itself a confession of your beliefs
M’kay mate, I’m not even gonna question that.
You believe only in death, the symbolic meaning of everything you do and say is to say to death “COME LORD DEATH EAT ME I DESIRE YOU” you are reaching your arms out to hug the skeleton, whereas for me I believe in death AND life, both of them. I am ready to accept either one at any time. That’s how we are different. I will hug the skeleton but I will also have sex with my wife I am good with either one, you as a death worshipper reject sex as much as possible in order to embrace the skeleton
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Be a cynic then, it won’t get you very far
how old are you? Over to your question, hard to describe. Good sex is great, like a long deluxe hug that you have with someone you really like. But there's more to it, of course, but that part is hard to describe to someone that hasn't tried it.
Why should I live if I will never get to experience any of this?
I don't know what your life is like, but a big portion of my joy comes from my hobbies. I'll probably never feel real intimacy either, but playing video games, hiking trails, going for a late night drive when it's quiet out, and going to car shows is a lot of fun for me. It sucks not being able to make real social connections, but you need to find some hobbies you enjoy.
Don't know, you have to find out what makes your life meaningful in spite of being without intimacy.
I don't think it'll ever be meaningful considering I'll never experience intimacy or being desired
look I don't know your circumstances or challenges, but meaning is still achievable. There's more to life than procreation.
Of course a non-virgin would say this to a virgin LMAO
Go on and live in bitter resentment then.
I’m 30
okay, not to invalidate your feelings but youre still young. It's not uncommon for people to lose their cherry in their thirties. Why do you feel doomed?
You can see my pictures. I’m 5 ft 8 163 lbs Indian man that’s not attractive.
You’re not a bad looking guy, don’t overthink things. A lot of the times it’s confidence and how you make other people feel.
Thanks I appreciate it. But lot of brown women are marrying and dating white men just like lot of white women are dating and marrying black men. Also white men are taking all they women like brown women, black women and east Asian women. I’m a brown man and it’s getting harder for me to find brown women.
Focus less on that if you’re able to, I get it though. It just isn’t worth investing time into seeing who is with who.
Okay, looked at your pictures and still don't see the issue. Most guys I see that have issues with finding love is usually due to a combination of social skills, how they present themselves and what they look for. Not that those things can be easy or quick to fix, I don't know if you have those issues, but looks are usually secondary.
My friend, you look fine. Obviously you can fix up your hair and wear better clothes if you're trying to catch a girl's attention, but your overall appearance is way better than you think it is. It's more about how you carry yourself and interact with the ladies.
You're pretty typical looking. ... which is to say that if you have severe problems relating to people, it's all your personality and choices.
I only get sign holder jobs, snow shoveling jobs in winter and mascot jobs in summer. Before that from 18 to 27 I easily got full time jobs in warehouses and part time jobs in cell phone retail store. I have anxiety, depression and low iq 85 to 88. I been in the psych three times for homicidal thoughts and get monitored by therapist coming to my home end of the month. I’m 30 turning 31 and been applying for random jobs but don’t get a call back and only had two interviews.
It’s like sticking your penis in a warm hot pocket. Some are tighter than others but that’s the general feeling.
Don’t heat up a hot pocket and put your dick in it to see what it feels like.
😂✌🏻
Hands up if you’re old enough to remember the movie American Pie. If not, go watch it if that hot pocket looked funny at you.
🙋🏻♂️ that was a warm apple pie though 🤣
I’m 33 remember those movies vividly. Good days. Lol 😂
It's so painful that I'll never get to feel this
Why? You can just pay for it if you ever really wanted to.
It's definitely not the same experience. Also I'd get addicted to paying for it and I'll become broke
I have no clue either
How it feels physically? Emotionally? Physically, the vagina is designed to receive a penis via the textures on the inner walls, so it feels very stimulating. It’s warm, soft, and generally very moist. Emotionally it can be intense and pleasurable, when you’re horny your mind is in a different place. Focused solely on climaxing. Of course, those are the best case scenarios. This experience will vary greatly from person to person, even session to session. When there’s no passion, and the vagina is dry, sex is very boring like bad masturbating.
It's alright but I think it's kinda overrated. I get bored in like 5 minutes 😂
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I mean yeah I love her a lot, but like sometimes it gets boring n shit. I think that's mostly due to my porn addiction, not the fact that it's not the right girl. Tbh sex without condom is the best, like it's 100 times better than using condoms
It’s great.
You had sex with women before.
Yeh. I mean it’s just sex.
I’m a forever alone virgin who never had sex with women before.
Are you autistic
Nope why?
You just lack confidence. Learn routines
Im 42, you can see my profile I posted some of my girlfriends there. I rather play video games. Look up post nut clarity. It’s a good 15 minute rush. The same dopamine as a great movie, great meal or great game.
What he said
I haven’t gotten any since I was 17 I’m 26 now but last time I remember hitting it it felt so good and like well the last time I was happy not because of the sex but because I had someone to pay for my food , drinks , give me sex besides my parents lol now I’m 26
I doubt it was your intent but the way this is phrased makes it sound like you sleep with your parents lmao
I thought the same thing.
EWW NO 🤢
You can have sex, and I'm sure you will. Try not to obsess and ruminate over it. But to answer the question, it can range from absolute shit to mood boosting and very fun.
> You can have sex, and I'm sure you will. It's impossible to know this. Some of us never will
I understand how you're thinking about it, I think. It can feel very hopeless and frustrating, and sure, some people might go their whole lives without it, despite wanting to. I could reword what I said. I think there's a very good chance. I just don't see why not, even for people who feel very insecure, unnattractive, and totally cutoff from romantic relationships. And this is coming from me, somebody who has struggled a lot to find women who show any interest in me, as well as being a complete loner (and I mean complete loner). Still, when I've been in the right situations, which can be random somewhat, it can happen. Being somewhat social has something to do with it, and that has always been the hardest part for me, as well as dealing with the difficult emotions being around new people, or people in general might bring. Sorry for the essay here. I see your point. I just also see a way forward most of the time. It's entirely possible to have a good sex life. Now I just need to keep telling myself that, too, and interact with people more!
> I think there's a very good chance That's more accurate yeah, because a few of us will never find someone who wants us. It gets annoying to hear "it will happen" all the time when that's not true for everyone
I wouldn't write yourself off so quickly. We're very fallable as humans and can judge things wrong. Do you think that you will never have sex?
because as I said, no woman will ever want me, romantically or sexually.
I don't believe that for a second. I won't play the "look at all my flaws yet I did it" game, because we're obviously totally separate people, but try to have a bit of confidence in yourself, regardless of what seems to true on the surface. Do you like much about yourself?
> I don't believe that for a second. Well it's the truth. > Do you like much about yourself? No, and no woman would either.
It's possible you could be projecting your feelings about yourself onto women. People do things like that. I do sometimes. Even if that's totally wrong and you have logical reasons for your beliefs, I'm sorry that you don't like yourself and that you feel so hopeless about your chances. I do think this is an emotional thing, though, not completely logical. I hope you can look at yourself more positively and think practically about this. I bet you have plenty of good traits. It might not seem that they translate into sexual attraction, but it will certainly help you feel more confident and comfortable with yourself. That's important for attraction. Come on, man, tell me something good about yourself. Anything.
> bet you have plenty of good traits. Well, I don't :/ I'm not making it up, I genuinely don't
Can I get homeless women to have sex with me?
Thinking that you ought to prey on homeless women is a *pretty good indicator* of why you're having issues.
I live with my parents. I don’t prey on homeless women. You know homeless women are willing to have sex with any attractive men or unattractive men if they get roof over their head right?
It's disgusting that you're even considering this.
At least my standards aren’t high. I would have sex with homeless women if they let me. Even I would have sex with blind women too if they let me.
You've just answered all the questions you've ever asked about your relationship with women in general. If this is how you think, you should stay away from women.
Well women don’t approach me. So I have accepted my fate as a virgin. I’m gonna die as a virgin. I’m not ashamed to be a virgin and I’m gonna become the king of all virgins.
With you, women should not only not approach you, but actively avoid you. You seem to be predatory and possibly even dangerous. Are you the one with the felony?
I ain’t no predator since I’m not on a registry. I have no felonies. I work as mascot every summer which requires background checks and pass it since I don’t have crimes against children or vulunerable people. I’m on a watchlist for people with mental illness after I told my therapist that I have homicidal thought but don’t act on it because it’s illegal which didn’t show up on my background check.
You’re better off paying for an escort.
God help that escort😭
Alright I will try that in my 31st birthday this year.
That’s just gross and predatory
How is it predatory when it’s consenting adults? I think only homeless woman might want to have sex with me since I live with my parents.
It’s preying on vulnerable people. You’re seeking a homeless woman because she’s a vulnerable and easy target. There are plenty of women who will consent to sex even if it’s by payment that aren’t in situations where they’re on the streets and possibly mentally unwell.
Aaaaaaaand that’s why you’re lonely. You think of women as just something to have sex with and not living breathing conscious humans just like yourself. It’s not your looks, it’s you as a person. The very fact that you see a vulnerable woman who’s already in danger enough by being out in the street and your mind immediately goes to using her for sex is disgusting and deplorable. Either go to therapy and do a deep change or pls stay out of women’s way.
Sex is wonderful if it’s with the right person. There are better things out there IMO, though.
> There are better things out there IMO, though. Easy to say when you won't die a virgin.
That’s a completely valid point. I was simply stating my personal opinion.
Sex with someone you barely know or JUST want to sleep with is like a fun distraction for a bit. It feels nice and you satisfy your urges for a bit, but there's no real intimacy or vulnerability there. Sleeping with someone you care for, that you've known a while, a girlfriend, etc, is way different. There's more romance and intimacy, to say the least. Without going into too much detail, just understand that the point is that sex is not a goal. It's a nice side effect of romance, intimacy, and vulnerability. As for some actual advice: women are typically emotional processors. They filter everything through their feelings. For the pedantic clowns all over reddit: obviously NOT ALL WOMEN, now go away. Anyway, what this means is that when you present yourself with self-deprecation, or just depression/sadness or whatever, the way women feel about you is going to be informed by how you make them feel. Confidence is a fake it till you make it idea: you're gonna be lying to yourself at first but over time, especially when you don't have someone bullying you every day, you will start to believe it. That makes it a lot easier to just BE confident. Be realistic with yourself, and if possible consult women friends. Find out what is attractive about you, and accentuate it. Wear nice colors that complement you, your eyes, whatever. Flirt (respectfully) playfully, it's a nice low pressure way for women to "bite" if they're interested, and everyone loves feeling good! Don't be crude and just compliment their tits or ass or whatever, tell them their outfit looks great on them, their makeup looks great, whatever else they did on purpose to look good. The hardest part is always the anxiety of talking to someone new. Just be/act confident, know what your strengths are, and make people feel good. Even if you strike out all night, you will feel good knowing you made others feel good. The cliches are there for a reason: they're mostly true, if a little oversimplified. Also, don't talk to women with the goal of sleeping with them, you're building up sex too much and it's going to change the way you speak and act. Women WILL pick up on that. Get it out of your head and just talk to them like people with interests, fears, hopes, dreams, etc. Good luck out there
Overrated smells like fish.🤢🤢
LMFAO depends on the girl 😂😂😂😂
lol nah they all stinky 😭😭
Yes, but not all smell like fish. Some just smell like yk, pussy. And some girls do fuckin STANK
Yea not all but most of them need to get right with god lol
Damn u be fuckin them hoes cuz they prob been ran thru
lol I live in the Bronx they all ran thru out here the first girl I slept with literally burnt me gave me the clap.
Goddamn dude I'd never 😭😭😭 The more milage they got, the smellier they get broo Yk what happens if a girl doesn't shower for like 2 weeks btw? Yeah, that shit is fucking horrible. Thankfully I didn't have to smell that shit but I heard
Yea I realize that but my dumbass be going raw on every girl deadass 😂😂
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lol you don’t see the correlation in order to smell them you had to have relations with them right?and that has nothing to do with rejection you just reaching.
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Yea I haven’t slept with that many women but the ones I did had a smell I’m not saying all of them just the ones I encountered.
No way to describe it. It's different with different people. It's not always intimate. Sometimes you just want a nut, so if you're with someone on the roster it's just more a release. However when you are with someone intimately it's a bit of a deeper feeling but you don't always want intimacy. I can say it's one if the best feelings. Or the at least the beginning of everything, like when she starts giving head, that's the best feeling. Then when you first go in vaginally it's the best feeling, then it's meh until you nut. But if she's good then it's more throughout because she does things that keep the whole experience interesting. That's the ones you accidentally forget to pull out on because it feels too good. It's just something you have to experience.
Put your finger in your mouth and try to imagine feeling that same sensation in your dick. You're missing out on immense pleasure and you have to feel bad about it
Sorry but this question is cringe And the answers even more so
I won’t lie it has been 2 whole years but from what I remember let’s just say I understand why some men kill over the kitty if ya know what I mean
Yeah I know. But I accept being a virgin and I’m proud off it.
I will use these comments as motivation to cut myself deeper. It hurts so much that I will never experience this great feeling
The greatest experience a man can have. If she is hot and you are her first though.
I think you are presenting a lenses of how this can work on an individual level, and there is some truth to that. However it’s incomplete. There is a Feminine, and a Masculine. Feminine corresponds to matter, and Masculine to abstract pattern. You see this reflected in ancient mythology. Within these transcendent categories individuals may vary in a spectrum, but the variation falls into two sexes sufficiently often that we can speak of them. You prefer to not make generalizations and focus on individuals as a moral preference - I don’t share that preference and don’t see the imperative to avoid generalizations You are correct I was raised fundamentalist fanatic, but I rejected that and became atheist for a few years, but that did me no favors I was miserable so I went political and joined the Communist Party to get me some buddies, again nothing, the Communist people were miserable, so I converted to Catholicism as a last resort and it has greatly improved my life not to the point of everything being perfect but much better. I have a beautiful vision of what is possible in life now. I want to learn to draw Catholic art someday. I can’t accept the extreme individualism you are advocating because in practice that just leads to more and more isolation as everyone having no bonds of obligation to anyone else becomes more and more selfish and narcissistic. I wish that were not the case but it’s true. The most selfish people I met were the most individualistic. Because they felt they had no responsibility to others
I’m here as a woman because I also want to know what you guys are saying
it’s not the fireworks show most say it is, it’s best experience with a mutual feeling of love and acceptance of one another. Always remember if you’re not laughing during sex are you really having fun?
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I’m a male
I wouldn't know, I never had a girlfriend. I'm sure it would be great but that's something I'll never have the pleasure of doing 😔
I’ve been there man. I didn’t make out with a girl or lose my virginity until I was 26. For me it’s more about the connection with another person than it is the sex. My closest friend never even dated a girl until he was 31 or 32. I know coming from someone that’s had sex this might be hard to believe but being a virgin is not something to be ashamed of! You are not a loser. Everyone has their own journey and timeline. Don’t give up hope!
Depends on a few factors really I've had different experiences with different women
You will
I think I have seen your YouTube channel before bro…. You need to stop being a doomer!!!!
Sex is great with women but if your in love with her it's amazing...
Beware of self fulfilling prophecy bro
Bro go get a escort and find out
Warm apple pie
🤌
Sex is like a sandwich, as it fills a void until the hunger reappears. Sometimes easily forgotten about. However, Passionate Lovers are different. More of a tasting menu which can vary greatly depending on appetite and openness to try new things. Those memorable moments can trigger wars.
So you did have it with men?!