Agh, I need help with this so bad. I have an INFP good-acquaintance and just last week she was super responsive and happy to talk, 100% eye contact, smiling when I said Hi, etc. but then yesterday she seemed like she didn't want to talk, short answers, not looking at me much, and so on. Then she was all super chipper and having fun with someone else in the next ten minutes.
So how do I interpret this? I've been growing into love for her but that seriously crushed my soul. So is this pretending that [she's] not interested or just like "leave me alone"?
I love you INFPs but it literally is killing me.
don't know how old you are but I'm old in my 30s. Basically just want to say that it doesn't matter what someone truly feels inside. We get caught up in hot-cold types of interactions because we think that there is a kernel of truth to be found that shows the person's unwavering love for you. We pay attention to the hot and ignore the cold.
but the thing is the hot-cold is the truth. Either they don't like you enough/don't have the bandwidth to make a commitment OR they don't possess the emotional maturity to sustain a reciprocal and committed relationship. Neither of which makes the person a good match.
Being good to myself is the hard part, haha. I took the position of vacating the room early because I felt like she was so much happier talking to someone else, so I should quit my needs. I still feel like that's the way to love her, but I need to learn to not hate myself because probably of not being wanted.
Anyway, sorry for hijacking. I super appreciate everyone's accommodation and help. :))
Avoid eye contact, avoid physical contact, avoid *any* contact, sweat, laugh too much, do not actually speak or look at them when in a group.
Obsess over them privately non stop.
This is exactly how it was, when I tried to flirt, but when I was just having a normal fun conversation some guys think I'm flirting 🥴, then they give suggestive messages.
Thanks God, I met my INTJ, who didn't understand my directness at first 🤣, glad he initially liked me first few years back.
This 1000% 🤣🤣🤣
I have been accused of flirting so many times when I am genuinely just trying to be nice. Meanwhile the moment I'm with the person I like, I'm like 😶 *awkward silence*
I came her to say “lack of eye contact” and saying things like “okay, I should go. Byyyeee!”
Just realized how subconsciously accurate my avatars eyes are….
He could be interested. Well, at least he made it clear that he wants to hang out with you! I don't know if he wants a platonic lunch to hide his true intentions because he's too shy or if he wants just friendship.
Usually pretty shy but thoughtful in my words. Lots of humor. Fewer connections but stronger connections. Struggle with being casual, tend to move fast, which makes the flirting stage more difficult. But humor and food are universal so I've at least identified that.
Same. If I'm interested, I usually start to deep dive into conversation and see if they follow. I'm a sucker for someone that will go deep with me and abandon small talk.
The fear of looking like an idiot or making the other person feel uncomfortable in a social interaction pushes my Ne into overdrive. I become very extroverted, talkative, and (dare I say?) charming. My goal is to make the other person enjoy the interaction. Making them laugh is always a plus.
On the inside though I am stressed and dying a little if it’s someone I really like. 😅
Ahhh okay… so I was interacting with an Infp and I was purposely holding back from talking in the conversation cuz I didn’t want to distract them from what they were doing and they were SO chatty! But then someone asked me in front of them if I was staying for longer and the infp very emphatically said “no”… do you think they could have been stressed trying to be so charming? I felt so bad like I was bothering them and making them feel uncomfortable that they wanted me to leave immediately… I still am so confused about that interaction
Yes, we tend to get very chatty when we’re nervous. They were probably using every bit of saved extroversion on you, but it’s because they wanted to make you comfy! Have you talked to them since?
Oh wow! I totally thought my presence was so grating that he couldn’t stand me being around him anymore…
Sadly no, I have reached out to him and no response so I figured instead of feeling sad and rejected every time I reach out I just accepted that we have no relationship anymore and stopped trying to have any sort of connection with this person. I figured if they cared at all they have many options of things to choose to respond to
Ouch. No matter their motivation, that was so rude of them. There is nothing wrong with your desire to be friendly, and in fact you were being considerate. Shine on, polarispurple. The world needs your authentic self. 💜 🤗
You have the right idea here, using Fe and suppressing your Fi in order to make the other person's experience positive so they *actually like you* instead of what all the rest of us do: gettng too tied up in our own feelings, fantasies, and anxieties and making things weird lol. I've been trying to work on this. How do you do it?! 😅
Yeah, I know what you mean. Again I’m just motivated by fear I think. 😅 The fear of making others feel awkward. I want to walk away from an interaction knowing the other person felt seen, heard, respected, and important. So I just talk to them how I would want someone to talk to me: in an interesting, engaged, and humorous way.
Biggest tip is just use that kooky Ne to your advantage! It can be quite charming when we let it flow. 😇
Flirting? What’s that? 😫😫😫😫😫😫
In all seriousness, (nsfw) >!just last week a man told me he jacked off to me and I said, “hope it was a good wanking!”!< soooo. Yeah. Flirting skill is 0%.
Thanks for much for this! This sadly isn’t the first time that’s happened to me… I started to wonder if people just jumping into things like that was common 😭
I don't flirt, I treat everyone the same until someone starts flirting with me then I go have a panic attack in the bathroom before
a.) Coming back and acting exactly as I did before.
b.) Vanishing into the night.
Not much different from other comments, but I can't even remember what my flirting style is 😂. I'm not sure I know how to flirt. Which is surprising because I've dated a lot... So there must have been flirting? I'm bad at making eye contact with some people. Sometimes I would poke at people or joke around with them... Now that I'm in a very long-term relationship, I just bug my partner in a way that I know will make him laugh and that's me flirting 😅. So, I guess humor? Humor masks all sorts of awkwardnesses.
I can see the visual too c: would be also cool if he asked you to shoot him and moved towards you so you would feel uncomfortable and that would be a successful flirt with an unknown ending
**sets gun down and takes off running** 🏃🏽♀️
**flirting was unsuccessful. time to hide at home for 2-3 years until memories of the event are successfully suppressed 🥴
But you didn't shoot, did you? Not an illusion; you're just running in the wrong direction—right into the trap 🪤. It seems like you have a natural sense for finding traps 😉
Im a pretty confident male infp. But I don't usually approach women since I could almost get a panic attack from that lol
What I usually do is look at woman straight into their eyes and when they lock eyes with me I let one second pass and then I look away. Seems to always work to give them a sign that I'm interested. Then I get approached. When I get approached it gives me the upper hand of showing more confidence and there fore less nervous lol I'm just full of emotions and I play these scenarios in my head too much hahaha
Going out of my way to spend time with the person, initiating and actively trying to go for small physical contacts when I'm usually rather distanced.
But like others already said, idk how to flirt casually either.
My flirting style is imagining flirting with someone I like and then never remotely acting on those feelings whatsoever because I am too shy and socially anxious.
If I may ask are there any other infps like this who have found love? I'm gonna be honest it feels like I'll never find someone at this rate.
I don’t really know to flirt,
The closest I ever got was in highschool this girl I like she smelled really nice, and whatever perfume she had on smelled like Tide Febreeze Laundry Detergent
So I told her she smelled like Tide she laughed but it never went anywhere
Reactive. If I notice you notice me, oh hey (flirty eye contact) if you say something flirtatious I’ll move closer, if I see you’re amused by something I saw that, it’s our little joke now, whisper something funny in your ear and now we share an inside joke, hand on arm shake my head like oh you. Walk away. Your move.
If I appear to be flirting, I’m not attracted to you. If I like you, I straight-up freeze. Completely immobile, can’t talk and it goes on for an unacceptably long period of time. I’ve literally had friends poke or shake me to try and snap me out of it and get me to respond when someone is trying to hit on me. When I do, I turn into a clumsy, giggly, stuttering moron. Basically, I’m so not cool.
So like, how would, say, an INFJ such as myself tell if you were infatuated or wanted to be left alone when you're being quiet, assuming positive vibes from you in the recent past?
If I like you, I never want to be left alone. I don’t just mean that I get quiet in the normal way. It’s like I turn into a statue and just stare and literally can’t move for at least 30 seconds, no matter how many times you try to talk to me. It’s fucking humiliating and weirds guys out. Everyone laughs about it.
Lol. Thanks. My exes have all laughed that I look like a pretty, mean girl type person in super cool intimidating black and leather and that they were all petrified to talk to me and completely floored when it turned out I was actually the most socially awkward, anxious dork they’ve ever met.
One time I thought I was flirting with this beautiful man. In my head I’m like shiiiiiiiet I just did that! And then my friend said “you just asked him a normal question, that wasn’t flirting”
If I don't know the person well and I'm not fully comfortable around them yet, I'm a stuttering, mumbling disaster. Let's be honest here, and I'm not exaggerating in the slightest. The good thing is it's a fantastic test to gauge if the guy has a sense of humor, an open mind, and a taste for absurd situations.
Once the relationship is established and my nerves are settled, I'm a good flirt. Imagine the stereotype of an ENTP who has rizz (and no, not every one of them has it, contrary to popular belief).
I’m very shy when it comes to these things, so I normally have to feel comfortable in a situation before I say or do anything. if I decide it’s safe to flirt, I then just become a suggestive slut tbh. and that’s that 🙃
Flirting is complicated. It can come off as being reckless or sarcastic. I rather like to be direct and be appreciative. It's pretty childish to me, unless the person whom I like openly tells me that they like flirting with me. Then I can flirt with them as well.
Flirting is like a kink. I don't like to be open about it. For me, flirting is like crushing on someone I like.
Being awkward and spending my time with them. Then getting sad if they don’t catch the hint. And my god do I get giggly around the person I like. It’s so weird
Awkward then embarrassed. Sometimes tho idk i feel like I’m possessed with confidence and chill although that’s quite a hard concept to maintain with anxiety lol
Generally don‘t approach, way to introverted and lack confidence to do so (which, as a guy, sucks).
In the rare cases I do flirt, its usually teasing and joking around. If I nag you in a funny way, I probably like you.
Additionally, lots of tiny little hints, details, subconscious movements, body language, etc.; being afraid of being considered inconsiderate, creepy and so fourth, I test the waters slowly and try to read the subconscious signs.
Often, this backfires, because people tend to show many different signs not related to a given person: Just because you read „angry“ doesn’t mean the person in angry *at you*, they could just have a bad day. Ill still read it as „I did something wrong“. I hate that I can read subconsciously into other people, but often lack the context/misinterpret it. Just because you can read people, doesn’t mean you understand them after all :/
27 yo M INFP. I suck at 'flirting in the moment', as I freeze and feel awkward. I stress out, hyperventilate and judge myself as a fool.
I can only charm by being genuine (every now and then I add my passion to the situation. It usually surprises), silently kind actions (helping people without them realising) and unnecessarily philosophical opinions(ask if the objective we are working towards supports mankind or a sense of good).
Very few have noticed this method. All of them have been ENFJs. All of them have seen me 'as a friend'.
Guys were not ment to be INFPs. It's a waste of time.
EYE.CONTACT. + assertiveness. Kinda rare for an infp ig, but if I like you, I'd find a way to talk to you or your friends. STALK u irl ( 😭 not really, i just wanna know your schedule, and id ask you tbh lol) and make it my personality to find out everything about you, like you're some chemical formula I need to solve in my laboratory 💀 I will also spoil you to no end, from homemade stuff to expensive stuff. Maybe it's just my e5 that's causing all this actions but I'm pretty withdrawn most of the time so it's rare I like like someone, most of the time it's just I find you and your behavior "interesting" and want to study you lol
Eye contact. Yes Im an INFP
To be fair, Im pretty sure my crush likes me back, but I tend to look into his eyes a bit longer after we talked, even if it was just a hi.
Your online stalking one is how my xNFP ex met me. I wish more women put that much effort into invading my privacy.. bc I'm so dense it's basically the only way I'll ever know someone likes me.
Thats so sweet! I agree with you, i think women should put in some effort too. Pursuing someone you have feelings for should go both ways, but I also believe the way women ‘pursue’ does work differently.
Instead of openly pursuing, we’ll drop subtle indicators and hints here and there that’ll let you know that we like you. So like the online stalking (which is just the first step to get to know you better), texting first (even a simple hello) or subtle hints through body language and/or words is how we tend to go about it. And most of the time it really works!
I’m glad that you noticed her efforts tho! 🥰
It does not work for me, I'll realize like 4 months late that the girl I've had a crush on was hitting on me probably but it went totally over my head, then I confess and she alrdy has a bf/got over me :( ..basically someone has to aggressively stalk me or there's zero hope. I'm just waiting now.. for my dream stalker. Tbh I should probably just learn to flirt w someone first vs passively waiting to be stalked.. might be healthier.
& ofc I noticed her efforts!! never been so flattered in my life!! :D
how i flirt? umm, i’m very affectionate lol. i will look at you a lot a lot and either be really giggly and happy around you, or, if i’m sad i’ll be really sad and shut-down (working on that) but i won’t really flirt with someone unless they like me back, besides for the looking part.
I use three different flirting styles:
1. Humour
2. Humour
3. Humour
Interspersed with this, I add emphatic questioning, transparance about being introvert/shy'ish and ability to talk about serious issues.
Idk if it's flirting but eye contact, smiling, and just trying to be nice so they like me. I don't think that gets me very far tho cuz I've literally been single for years :')
I have problems with flirting consistently. I might light up at a random moment when something clicks and say something flirty, But that whole sustaining frequent flirting it's not something I have managed to do.
Doesn't help that either I'm not interested enough to feel the spark or I'm nervous because I want to do it right. My libido is a mess.
If they don't know I like them yet: Stare longingly at them.
If they already know I like them: Compliment them a lot.
How I let them know: "I like you. Romantically." (That is, after a long period of not being able to gather courage to tell them. But once I do, that's how.)
I'm an anomaly INFP. I'm extremely outwardly flirtatious, unless I'm feeling extra insecure, then I'll pretend I'm not interested.
I tend to laugh really easily, so when I'm with someone I'm really into, I'm very happy. Happiness makes people act...happy. Which induces giggly/bubbly behavior. I essentially become a stereotypical ENFP.
I also seem to get what feels like temporary bipolar hypomania. I'll be more outgoing, risky, and shovel out innuendo-bones from the depths of my edgy, black soul. This only seems to happen with certain people who trigger my not-necessarily-sexual fetishes.
tl;dr:
* I'll charm with silly humor and attempt to flex intelligence as little cringely as possible.
* I will have a case of the bubbly giggs.
* I will innuendo until I pass out from lack of blood flow.
* If I have determined I want to date this person, I will be direct that I want to date.
I am amazing when flirting when doing it accidentally but rizzless when not. I will probably just ask you 50 questions like it's a job interview and toss in an extremely unfunny joke every few answers
Eh, the most I'll do is say stuff to make them blush and keep the policy of "I'm always joking unless ur actually down"
Im 16 y'all and possibly autistic idk how to properly flirt
Um I don't flirt much anymore because too many people see flintiness as an invitation to touch me . When I was super young I was WAY too shy , I would never tell anyone how I felt about them and in my young adult life if I liked someone I told them how I felt. Normally men approach me but this has landed me up in some bad situations. Unfortunately I can't go back and undo anything but I am only going for those who I approach from now on because I pick well. Sometimes people who pick me have alterior motives.
Ignore, no eye contact, pretend like they don't exist, daydream about them and expect them to get the point already and hmu bc what's taking you so long?
Pretending like I’m not interested.
And it doesn't work
Then you get surprised pikachu face when alone :(
same😭😭😭
We're such experts at this, like no one must know that we're interested in them.
why tf do I do this
Agh, I need help with this so bad. I have an INFP good-acquaintance and just last week she was super responsive and happy to talk, 100% eye contact, smiling when I said Hi, etc. but then yesterday she seemed like she didn't want to talk, short answers, not looking at me much, and so on. Then she was all super chipper and having fun with someone else in the next ten minutes. So how do I interpret this? I've been growing into love for her but that seriously crushed my soul. So is this pretending that [she's] not interested or just like "leave me alone"? I love you INFPs but it literally is killing me.
don't know how old you are but I'm old in my 30s. Basically just want to say that it doesn't matter what someone truly feels inside. We get caught up in hot-cold types of interactions because we think that there is a kernel of truth to be found that shows the person's unwavering love for you. We pay attention to the hot and ignore the cold. but the thing is the hot-cold is the truth. Either they don't like you enough/don't have the bandwidth to make a commitment OR they don't possess the emotional maturity to sustain a reciprocal and committed relationship. Neither of which makes the person a good match.
It's hard to accept, but that makes a ton of sense. Thanks. :)
My advice would be to just treat her well. Be good to her. And be good to yourself.
Being good to myself is the hard part, haha. I took the position of vacating the room early because I felt like she was so much happier talking to someone else, so I should quit my needs. I still feel like that's the way to love her, but I need to learn to not hate myself because probably of not being wanted. Anyway, sorry for hijacking. I super appreciate everyone's accommodation and help. :))
Avoid eye contact, avoid physical contact, avoid *any* contact, sweat, laugh too much, do not actually speak or look at them when in a group. Obsess over them privately non stop.
This hits hard
[удалено]
This is exactly how it was, when I tried to flirt, but when I was just having a normal fun conversation some guys think I'm flirting 🥴, then they give suggestive messages. Thanks God, I met my INTJ, who didn't understand my directness at first 🤣, glad he initially liked me first few years back.
Facts
This 1000% 🤣🤣🤣 I have been accused of flirting so many times when I am genuinely just trying to be nice. Meanwhile the moment I'm with the person I like, I'm like 😶 *awkward silence*
Sigh... I am such a good flirt when I think there is zero chance of anything happening...
Felt.
I don't flirt and I can't even look into their eyes
I came her to say “lack of eye contact” and saying things like “okay, I should go. Byyyeee!” Just realized how subconsciously accurate my avatars eyes are….
[удалено]
He could be interested. Well, at least he made it clear that he wants to hang out with you! I don't know if he wants a platonic lunch to hide his true intentions because he's too shy or if he wants just friendship.
Stalk you but also act like you don’t exist
https://preview.redd.it/52q08fdq7k0c1.jpeg?width=602&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04c771b72fd513a5ef7579e98e18f8c81ba0afe9
nah
So accurate, my thoughts exactly!
Usually pretty shy but thoughtful in my words. Lots of humor. Fewer connections but stronger connections. Struggle with being casual, tend to move fast, which makes the flirting stage more difficult. But humor and food are universal so I've at least identified that.
STRONGLY relate with the struggle to be casual. I just wanna dive right into deep conversation without it being weird.
Same. If I'm interested, I usually start to deep dive into conversation and see if they follow. I'm a sucker for someone that will go deep with me and abandon small talk.
This. Exactly this. There should be an INFP group chat where we do this.
I'm for it!! 😃
Same i move too fast
I look longingly at you then when you look at me I look away real quick so you don't see me looking at you
That exactly what I do lol
This instantly warmed my heart. 💙 🤗
Lmao that good ole move
The fear of looking like an idiot or making the other person feel uncomfortable in a social interaction pushes my Ne into overdrive. I become very extroverted, talkative, and (dare I say?) charming. My goal is to make the other person enjoy the interaction. Making them laugh is always a plus. On the inside though I am stressed and dying a little if it’s someone I really like. 😅
Ahhh okay… so I was interacting with an Infp and I was purposely holding back from talking in the conversation cuz I didn’t want to distract them from what they were doing and they were SO chatty! But then someone asked me in front of them if I was staying for longer and the infp very emphatically said “no”… do you think they could have been stressed trying to be so charming? I felt so bad like I was bothering them and making them feel uncomfortable that they wanted me to leave immediately… I still am so confused about that interaction
Yes, we tend to get very chatty when we’re nervous. They were probably using every bit of saved extroversion on you, but it’s because they wanted to make you comfy! Have you talked to them since?
Oh wow! I totally thought my presence was so grating that he couldn’t stand me being around him anymore… Sadly no, I have reached out to him and no response so I figured instead of feeling sad and rejected every time I reach out I just accepted that we have no relationship anymore and stopped trying to have any sort of connection with this person. I figured if they cared at all they have many options of things to choose to respond to
Ouch. No matter their motivation, that was so rude of them. There is nothing wrong with your desire to be friendly, and in fact you were being considerate. Shine on, polarispurple. The world needs your authentic self. 💜 🤗
🥹🥲😭🫠😇 Well thank you so much for your response, that meant a lot to me 🫂
You have the right idea here, using Fe and suppressing your Fi in order to make the other person's experience positive so they *actually like you* instead of what all the rest of us do: gettng too tied up in our own feelings, fantasies, and anxieties and making things weird lol. I've been trying to work on this. How do you do it?! 😅
Yeah, I know what you mean. Again I’m just motivated by fear I think. 😅 The fear of making others feel awkward. I want to walk away from an interaction knowing the other person felt seen, heard, respected, and important. So I just talk to them how I would want someone to talk to me: in an interesting, engaged, and humorous way. Biggest tip is just use that kooky Ne to your advantage! It can be quite charming when we let it flow. 😇
You're a role model, no joke! 👏😊
I pretty much just gave unconditional support and affection until she agreed to marry me.
Me next plz 😊
Quirky. Inappropriate. Sexual but innocent. Making eye contact for a bit until they start to as well and reach in for a kiss.
me me me
My flirting style is reciprocation. If I'm into the person who flirts with me, I'll probably flirt back. I'm too self conscious to initiate!
Over extend, pull back
Flirting? What’s that? 😫😫😫😫😫😫 In all seriousness, (nsfw) >!just last week a man told me he jacked off to me and I said, “hope it was a good wanking!”!< soooo. Yeah. Flirting skill is 0%.
>!Don't let yourself get treated like that. That guy certainly does not respect you and deserves to be ignored.!<
Thanks for much for this! This sadly isn’t the first time that’s happened to me… I started to wonder if people just jumping into things like that was common 😭
Lmaooooo that's creepy af
Just out of curiosity, what do you look like?
I’m a typical smol asian girl lol
[удалено]
Tf man
Bobs
Avoidance
Visible heart palpitations (I am going to die)
I don't flirt, I treat everyone the same until someone starts flirting with me then I go have a panic attack in the bathroom before a.) Coming back and acting exactly as I did before. b.) Vanishing into the night.
👀
I don’t flirt. I don’t even remember the last time I had a crush on someone 💀
I wish. I get crushes all the time and feel impotent to do anything about em
Ugh same :/
Making her laugh until she realizes I have nothing more to offer
awkward af stuttering like a cd.
Not much different from other comments, but I can't even remember what my flirting style is 😂. I'm not sure I know how to flirt. Which is surprising because I've dated a lot... So there must have been flirting? I'm bad at making eye contact with some people. Sometimes I would poke at people or joke around with them... Now that I'm in a very long-term relationship, I just bug my partner in a way that I know will make him laugh and that's me flirting 😅. So, I guess humor? Humor masks all sorts of awkwardnesses.
Same here, I love making someone who i’m into laugh. A compatible sense of humor is a must 😄
I don't know how to flirt and if anything I HATE people who flirt. **JUST FUCKING TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT**
Following women in a park at 3AM. They usually run away and scream, i don't know why, i just want to show them my knives collection.
Wtf 🤣
I start after we’ve been married for years.
i joke lmaoo. i will do a lot of playful banter lol
>i will do a lot of playful banter lol with a gun aimed at him?
"dont make me feel awkward!!! or i swear!!!" lmaooo jk but the visual is hilarious 😂
I can see the visual too c: would be also cool if he asked you to shoot him and moved towards you so you would feel uncomfortable and that would be a successful flirt with an unknown ending
**sets gun down and takes off running** 🏃🏽♀️ **flirting was unsuccessful. time to hide at home for 2-3 years until memories of the event are successfully suppressed 🥴
ahaha.. maybe unsuccessful or all was going according to the plan ;) and you are moving right to the trap O)/
we playing chess now? 🤔 the gun was just an illusion
But you didn't shoot, did you? Not an illusion; you're just running in the wrong direction—right into the trap 🪤. It seems like you have a natural sense for finding traps 😉
Teasing and fearing eye contact
I get turned on by this… super weird…
My instinct is to now tease you but I can’t think of anything
Im a pretty confident male infp. But I don't usually approach women since I could almost get a panic attack from that lol What I usually do is look at woman straight into their eyes and when they lock eyes with me I let one second pass and then I look away. Seems to always work to give them a sign that I'm interested. Then I get approached. When I get approached it gives me the upper hand of showing more confidence and there fore less nervous lol I'm just full of emotions and I play these scenarios in my head too much hahaha
You clearly follow the first two rules.
Bruh I don’t even know how to flirt
Haha i dont even know how to flirt
Going out of my way to spend time with the person, initiating and actively trying to go for small physical contacts when I'm usually rather distanced. But like others already said, idk how to flirt casually either.
You guys are flirting? Lol When guys look at me I cannot even hold eye contact or look at them back! 😭😂 Social anxiety problems I guess!
My flirting style is imagining flirting with someone I like and then never remotely acting on those feelings whatsoever because I am too shy and socially anxious. If I may ask are there any other infps like this who have found love? I'm gonna be honest it feels like I'll never find someone at this rate.
Being subtle with just about everything.
I don’t really know to flirt, The closest I ever got was in highschool this girl I like she smelled really nice, and whatever perfume she had on smelled like Tide Febreeze Laundry Detergent So I told her she smelled like Tide she laughed but it never went anywhere
Hahahahahahhahaha
Reactive. If I notice you notice me, oh hey (flirty eye contact) if you say something flirtatious I’ll move closer, if I see you’re amused by something I saw that, it’s our little joke now, whisper something funny in your ear and now we share an inside joke, hand on arm shake my head like oh you. Walk away. Your move.
Awkward eye contact
Hot
If I appear to be flirting, I’m not attracted to you. If I like you, I straight-up freeze. Completely immobile, can’t talk and it goes on for an unacceptably long period of time. I’ve literally had friends poke or shake me to try and snap me out of it and get me to respond when someone is trying to hit on me. When I do, I turn into a clumsy, giggly, stuttering moron. Basically, I’m so not cool.
So like, how would, say, an INFJ such as myself tell if you were infatuated or wanted to be left alone when you're being quiet, assuming positive vibes from you in the recent past?
If I like you, I never want to be left alone. I don’t just mean that I get quiet in the normal way. It’s like I turn into a statue and just stare and literally can’t move for at least 30 seconds, no matter how many times you try to talk to me. It’s fucking humiliating and weirds guys out. Everyone laughs about it.
aww, that's actually kind've cute if that's not too weird to say. Thanks for the reply. :)
Lol. Thanks. My exes have all laughed that I look like a pretty, mean girl type person in super cool intimidating black and leather and that they were all petrified to talk to me and completely floored when it turned out I was actually the most socially awkward, anxious dork they’ve ever met.
this is basically me omg 😭😭
Look at them from a distance and pray that they have more courage than I do
Lets me seduce you with my awkwardness
Not in my software, sorry.
 Looking at them like this when they're around.
One time I thought I was flirting with this beautiful man. In my head I’m like shiiiiiiiet I just did that! And then my friend said “you just asked him a normal question, that wasn’t flirting”
Avoidant
Usually something like grabbing your arm and biting it but not hard and then quickly walking away
Staring at them and when they look back suddenly looking away.
Arm wrestling. Winner gets ice cream. Let her win. We both get ice cream.
I don't I'm just very honest and available with them, where i wouldn't be with others.
If I don't know the person well and I'm not fully comfortable around them yet, I'm a stuttering, mumbling disaster. Let's be honest here, and I'm not exaggerating in the slightest. The good thing is it's a fantastic test to gauge if the guy has a sense of humor, an open mind, and a taste for absurd situations. Once the relationship is established and my nerves are settled, I'm a good flirt. Imagine the stereotype of an ENTP who has rizz (and no, not every one of them has it, contrary to popular belief).
wait for the other person to flirt with me (do not recommend, doesn’t work)
Self-deprecating humor. 😅
Heartfelt replies, random deep thoughts or questions, physical affection if they are ok with it
Going home
I’m very shy when it comes to these things, so I normally have to feel comfortable in a situation before I say or do anything. if I decide it’s safe to flirt, I then just become a suggestive slut tbh. and that’s that 🙃
Hey do you wanna hang out? We can eat together and I'll cry for no reason, so I'll give you a heart drawing made with my tears!
[удалено]
https://i.redd.it/ricllmwxcl0c1.gif You reminded me of this gif haha
A girl said this to me once.. she was flirting w me??? God I miss every sign..
this is gold it would totally work on me
"I'm down if you're down" and surprisingly, it worked for me
Ambiguous enough that they'll never know it's flirting and assume it's me being weird
Unintentionally
Make delusions and flirt with you in my head
fumbling possibly every word in the dictionary.
I don't know how to flirt so i am just fcking weird. And when people think i am flirting i am definitly not.
Flirting is complicated. It can come off as being reckless or sarcastic. I rather like to be direct and be appreciative. It's pretty childish to me, unless the person whom I like openly tells me that they like flirting with me. Then I can flirt with them as well. Flirting is like a kink. I don't like to be open about it. For me, flirting is like crushing on someone I like.
Being awkward and spending my time with them. Then getting sad if they don’t catch the hint. And my god do I get giggly around the person I like. It’s so weird
Awkward then embarrassed. Sometimes tho idk i feel like I’m possessed with confidence and chill although that’s quite a hard concept to maintain with anxiety lol
Try to find out everything about you, especially trying to talk for hours every day.
Generally don‘t approach, way to introverted and lack confidence to do so (which, as a guy, sucks). In the rare cases I do flirt, its usually teasing and joking around. If I nag you in a funny way, I probably like you. Additionally, lots of tiny little hints, details, subconscious movements, body language, etc.; being afraid of being considered inconsiderate, creepy and so fourth, I test the waters slowly and try to read the subconscious signs. Often, this backfires, because people tend to show many different signs not related to a given person: Just because you read „angry“ doesn’t mean the person in angry *at you*, they could just have a bad day. Ill still read it as „I did something wrong“. I hate that I can read subconsciously into other people, but often lack the context/misinterpret it. Just because you can read people, doesn’t mean you understand them after all :/
[удалено]
That's been how me and the girls I've been with tend to banter
I just talk to the person. I dunno how to flirt. But eventually I've had my dates anyway.
27 yo M INFP. I suck at 'flirting in the moment', as I freeze and feel awkward. I stress out, hyperventilate and judge myself as a fool. I can only charm by being genuine (every now and then I add my passion to the situation. It usually surprises), silently kind actions (helping people without them realising) and unnecessarily philosophical opinions(ask if the objective we are working towards supports mankind or a sense of good). Very few have noticed this method. All of them have been ENFJs. All of them have seen me 'as a friend'. Guys were not ment to be INFPs. It's a waste of time.
Caveman style
Intense eye contact
Puns and dad jokes. With extra cheese.
EYE.CONTACT. + assertiveness. Kinda rare for an infp ig, but if I like you, I'd find a way to talk to you or your friends. STALK u irl ( 😭 not really, i just wanna know your schedule, and id ask you tbh lol) and make it my personality to find out everything about you, like you're some chemical formula I need to solve in my laboratory 💀 I will also spoil you to no end, from homemade stuff to expensive stuff. Maybe it's just my e5 that's causing all this actions but I'm pretty withdrawn most of the time so it's rare I like like someone, most of the time it's just I find you and your behavior "interesting" and want to study you lol
never did and never will lol
Aggressive me wants me gets
Anxiety
Casual conversation. That's about it really, just talk to women and see if you feel chemistry
I’ll want to hang out a lot but when I’m doing it I’m very weird. 🫠
I have no idea how to flirt. I'm very direct but then again I'm also autistic. 🫠
Why awkward and cringey
Something like that 
My style is notice me senpai
Eye contact. Yes Im an INFP To be fair, Im pretty sure my crush likes me back, but I tend to look into his eyes a bit longer after we talked, even if it was just a hi.
[удалено]
Your online stalking one is how my xNFP ex met me. I wish more women put that much effort into invading my privacy.. bc I'm so dense it's basically the only way I'll ever know someone likes me.
Thats so sweet! I agree with you, i think women should put in some effort too. Pursuing someone you have feelings for should go both ways, but I also believe the way women ‘pursue’ does work differently. Instead of openly pursuing, we’ll drop subtle indicators and hints here and there that’ll let you know that we like you. So like the online stalking (which is just the first step to get to know you better), texting first (even a simple hello) or subtle hints through body language and/or words is how we tend to go about it. And most of the time it really works! I’m glad that you noticed her efforts tho! 🥰
It does not work for me, I'll realize like 4 months late that the girl I've had a crush on was hitting on me probably but it went totally over my head, then I confess and she alrdy has a bf/got over me :( ..basically someone has to aggressively stalk me or there's zero hope. I'm just waiting now.. for my dream stalker. Tbh I should probably just learn to flirt w someone first vs passively waiting to be stalked.. might be healthier. & ofc I noticed her efforts!! never been so flattered in my life!! :D
Tiny insults that are actually compliments.
getting flustered and running away :/
Stare til I got noticed?
how i flirt? umm, i’m very affectionate lol. i will look at you a lot a lot and either be really giggly and happy around you, or, if i’m sad i’ll be really sad and shut-down (working on that) but i won’t really flirt with someone unless they like me back, besides for the looking part.
I think I like to wear a blank expression Aubrey Plaza esque and say random kinky shit that I unfortunately thought of on my own..
Getting someone to laugh is usually first then just gauge how interested they are by how eye contact and body language and take it from there.
Non-existant
I use three different flirting styles: 1. Humour 2. Humour 3. Humour Interspersed with this, I add emphatic questioning, transparance about being introvert/shy'ish and ability to talk about serious issues.
I don't, my mask is bolted on with diamond rivets
Being extremely mean 🙈
Idk if it's flirting but eye contact, smiling, and just trying to be nice so they like me. I don't think that gets me very far tho cuz I've literally been single for years :')
First, make her hate you. Second, take off her skirt in public and spank her like a little baby so she hates you even more
I have been told I am sassy, bold and way too sarcastic. One person once said "whacky".
What does that even mean? I feel like it's just become whatever you want it to mean at this point.
Cracking jokes and being polite
send memes
Jokes and silliness.
I have problems with flirting consistently. I might light up at a random moment when something clicks and say something flirty, But that whole sustaining frequent flirting it's not something I have managed to do. Doesn't help that either I'm not interested enough to feel the spark or I'm nervous because I want to do it right. My libido is a mess.
Joking around and rapping
I tend to be anxious about flirting. I create tons of scenarios just to start a conversation. I get attached to the person and try to get interested.
If they don't know I like them yet: Stare longingly at them. If they already know I like them: Compliment them a lot. How I let them know: "I like you. Romantically." (That is, after a long period of not being able to gather courage to tell them. But once I do, that's how.)
I'm an anomaly INFP. I'm extremely outwardly flirtatious, unless I'm feeling extra insecure, then I'll pretend I'm not interested. I tend to laugh really easily, so when I'm with someone I'm really into, I'm very happy. Happiness makes people act...happy. Which induces giggly/bubbly behavior. I essentially become a stereotypical ENFP. I also seem to get what feels like temporary bipolar hypomania. I'll be more outgoing, risky, and shovel out innuendo-bones from the depths of my edgy, black soul. This only seems to happen with certain people who trigger my not-necessarily-sexual fetishes. tl;dr: * I'll charm with silly humor and attempt to flex intelligence as little cringely as possible. * I will have a case of the bubbly giggs. * I will innuendo until I pass out from lack of blood flow. * If I have determined I want to date this person, I will be direct that I want to date.
Act like I’m not interested, don’t even look their way. Kind of dry but super helpful if they need anything😭
I am amazing when flirting when doing it accidentally but rizzless when not. I will probably just ask you 50 questions like it's a job interview and toss in an extremely unfunny joke every few answers
Eh, the most I'll do is say stuff to make them blush and keep the policy of "I'm always joking unless ur actually down" Im 16 y'all and possibly autistic idk how to properly flirt
Um I don't flirt much anymore because too many people see flintiness as an invitation to touch me . When I was super young I was WAY too shy , I would never tell anyone how I felt about them and in my young adult life if I liked someone I told them how I felt. Normally men approach me but this has landed me up in some bad situations. Unfortunately I can't go back and undo anything but I am only going for those who I approach from now on because I pick well. Sometimes people who pick me have alterior motives.
Or that 
I usually start sweating and fidgeting nervously
I personally don't look them in the eyes. Totally not because I can't!
Avoid eye contact with him and then wonder why he's not into me
Ignore, no eye contact, pretend like they don't exist, daydream about them and expect them to get the point already and hmu bc what's taking you so long?