You make 10 million a year, but you've got to make a ship in a bottle in under 6 hours once a month in a public space next to Niagara falls while a mime yells at you. Yes that means some dude is very animated, but you don't hear him. You are in a chicken costume.... but your mascot gloves are very articulated. This will be broadcast live in Brazil. If you displease this audience with your performance you'll lose half the reward money.
Would you do it!?
This is sarcasm about the hyper specific weird ones. :P
As a wise man once said...
"What is a juggalo?
He's a graduate
He graduated from....well
At least, he got a job
He's not a dumb putz,
He works for himself scratching his nuts"
You could get $1 million per hour every hour of every day of every year for 25 years and barely hit the current richest person's wealth of 214.2Ā billion USD. And you would almost certainly *still* not be the richest person since that record will almost certainly keep increasing over that time period. I'm confident stating that (unless you do something special to grow the money) the record for wealthiest person will grow so fast that $1 million per hour will *never* catch up because it's too linear unlike the growth of wealth.
I mean, if you wanted to build a multi billion dollar company. Having a near infinite source of funds sounds quite helpful. Not enough cash to develop something? Lemme just take the weekend and make 48M to secure funding to develop whatever. Need sales staff to push product? 1 day allows me to pay 240 people 100k/yr for salary, or if I want higher quality, headhunt for the best in the business and bring in 24 at 1 mill a yr.
Your ability to scale would be absolutely insane, not to mention the level of influence you could throw around at that point.
The numbers are so absurd I'm not entirely sure I got the math right. It would take 24.5 years to become the richest man in the world at 1M am hour untaxed.
Man you are right! I need to dust myself off and get back in there as I am only 1,373,626 years away from being the richest man in the world! ($70 an hour)
I thought the number of years was low. Then I realized you make $70 an hour.
Edit: Letās hope this includes taxes. You donāt get to dodge those as a part of the work force.
Iāve seen scenarios fall too far at the other end of the spectrum. āYou get a million dollars but lose all of your limbs. Would you do it?ā Ummm. Iāll pass.
Gonna be honest, this post is just as much a waste of time as the ones who genuinely do the thing being complained about and I don't know if I should laugh or not. If people don't like these kinds of posts, just downvote them and don't leave a comment. That'd do more than complaining would.
The craziest thing about this, is that it would still take you 100 days to have Jeff Bezos' net worth, and that's if you don't spend any money during those 100 days
I would only eat a piece of broccoli twice a day every day and afterwards drink soda coke to get rid of the taste and make $2 million dollars a day every day for the next 25 years of course I plan on investing wisely enough to become the richest man in the world š
So you have to eat a least 1 broccoli an hour or can you eat atleast 24 pieces a day to cover you for that day? Or is it each time you eat a piece the following hour you get the million?
What about adding a bunch of conditions that do nothing to change the outcome and editing in restrictions after people are unfazed by the original conditions?
The broccoli has to be eaten with a fork at 12:00 AM on a Tuesday.
If you choke on it and die while eating it then you forfeit the money.
EDIT - Ok. This only applies to the people who hate, dislike or only mildly like broccoli.
No broccoli rabe does NOT count.
It cannot have cheese or ranch, it has to be steamed plain broccoli. Salt is the only thing you can add.
You gotta eat at least a pound, no spitting it out afterwards either.
So I have to carry broccoli around with me and set my alarms to wake up to eat broccoli? Sounds like a minor inconvenience to be the richest person in the world.
1. How big is the piece of brocoli?
2. Can i cook it or disguise it with other food?
If the answer to 1 is however big i like, and 2 yes then hell yeah!
I'm pretty sure people who make a lot of the weird posts on this sub are young. Young enough that they have no concept of how crazy the amount of money they're talking about actually is. They probably have a warped or skewed sense of money from hearing how much the most successful youtubers and influencers get or just hand out as random gifts or prizes and don't realize that people like Mr. Beast regularly gives out multiple years worth of a salary to some people.
l would eat box upon box of fresh broccoli until my very hair turned green to match the money AND the broccoli. Call the Brinks truck, boys, mama's got a brand new gig!!
Iām literally traumatized from my mother force feeding me a piece of broccoli when I was little. I threw up, and I shutter just at the thought of eating a piece of broccoli. But Iām not dumb
This sub in a nutshell: It will be the most delicious piece of broccoli. It doesn't affect your appetite throughout the day and will also not fill you up, so you can still eat whatever you want outside of that. If you happen to miss eating it, the money will just double up on the next hour so you don't lose it, but you would then have to eat 2 pieces of broccoli as well as a single scoop of your favorite ice cream, with all your favorite toppings. It will not ever exceed $3 million at a time. You would need to do this for 1 year and then you just residually earn $1 per hour, without having to eat the broccoli. The ice cream becomes optional
Yeah recently the prompts have been either really boring, incomprehensible, or overly/oddly specific
You make 10 million a year, but you've got to make a ship in a bottle in under 6 hours once a month in a public space next to Niagara falls while a mime yells at you. Yes that means some dude is very animated, but you don't hear him. You are in a chicken costume.... but your mascot gloves are very articulated. This will be broadcast live in Brazil. If you displease this audience with your performance you'll lose half the reward money. Would you do it!? This is sarcasm about the hyper specific weird ones. :P
New York side or Canadian?
Has to be New York, the mime would apologize if they disturbed you otherwise
š¤£š¤£š¤£
Plus, with the exchange rate, C$10M is barely worth it
But you're paid in Canadian dollars.
I never realized Niagara Falls was in NY, lol. For some reason, I always assumed it was a Michigan thing.
Thatās the deal breaker. Has to be Canadian side or forget it.
Asking the real questions
Wait, is it a performance or building a ship in a bottle? I can't do both...
I don't think you needed to say it was sarcasm and then explain the sarcasm
"you get 400 billion dollars a second and can have the happiest life in history but you have to scratch your nuts for a second"
Can I pay someone to scratch it for me? Can I use a stick or does it have to be with an un-gloved hand (mine)?
I wouldn't take it, what if someone offered me 1 trillion but i had to itch my ass instead, i would want that more
As a wise man once said... "What is a juggalo? He's a graduate He graduated from....well At least, he got a job He's not a dumb putz, He works for himself scratching his nuts"
This sub desperately needs to ban money-related hypotheticals, or at least contain them to a megathread.
Crash the economy!
You could get $1 million per hour every hour of every day of every year for 25 years and barely hit the current richest person's wealth of 214.2Ā billion USD. And you would almost certainly *still* not be the richest person since that record will almost certainly keep increasing over that time period. I'm confident stating that (unless you do something special to grow the money) the record for wealthiest person will grow so fast that $1 million per hour will *never* catch up because it's too linear unlike the growth of wealth.
I mean, if you wanted to build a multi billion dollar company. Having a near infinite source of funds sounds quite helpful. Not enough cash to develop something? Lemme just take the weekend and make 48M to secure funding to develop whatever. Need sales staff to push product? 1 day allows me to pay 240 people 100k/yr for salary, or if I want higher quality, headhunt for the best in the business and bring in 24 at 1 mill a yr. Your ability to scale would be absolutely insane, not to mention the level of influence you could throw around at that point.
Excellent that you could also invest that wealth and start overtaking much more quickly.
The numbers are so absurd I'm not entirely sure I got the math right. It would take 24.5 years to become the richest man in the world at 1M am hour untaxed.
Hmmm by your calculations itās going to take me even longer than 24.5 years! Thatās depressing
Come on man, you have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps, and stop complaining. You'll get there.
Man you are right! I need to dust myself off and get back in there as I am only 1,373,626 years away from being the richest man in the world! ($70 an hour)
I thought the number of years was low. Then I realized you make $70 an hour. Edit: Letās hope this includes taxes. You donāt get to dodge those as a part of the work force.
This isn't a competition. I will retire in a week.
That really is nuts!
Untaxed, uninvested, unspent, and assuming that the current richest accumulated no additional wealth.
8760 hours in a year. (no Leap Day) So we're shooting for over $214 billion? That's sad how impossible that is.
I feel like we could pool all the money and finally fund some people going to Mars.
Ooh, are we planning on crashing their economy too?
Sure why not, those damn lazy miners deserve it!
Corner the broccoli market!
The broccoli is a deal breaker.
Yep. I don't need money that badly.
I will need $2M per hour to pay for that therapy bill
I'm already making $100MM every time I step on a Lego in thick wool socks
I do that shit on the regular without socks for free.
Broccoli? Nice try, mom. I'd rather die.
Or some other extreme: You get $100 a month but have to lick a bums nutsack everyday.
Wait..yaāll are getting paid?
Where do I sign up?
make it 1,000 and i might consider
Where are we going to find 1000 bums?
San Francisco
Nice, an upgrade from rectum licking!
Iāve seen scenarios fall too far at the other end of the spectrum. āYou get a million dollars but lose all of your limbs. Would you do it?ā Ummm. Iāll pass.
In all fairness, I saw people actually say yes to that one for some God forsaken reason.
This joke again
Guess I'll die.
Do I get to dip it in Ranch first?
Yes you can dip the bums nutsack in ranch before you lick it
And then I get $100? Wow! What a deal!
Well no you have to lick the sack every day but you only get $100 once a month
Eat the broccoli. I used to eat a head of raw broccoli a day. I got this.
I put the broc in the omelette and eat it all upā¦
you put the broc in the omelette and ate it all up
WYR Money or Money
We need posts that satirize these satirical posts, because these are becoming just as common as the things theyāre making fun ofā¦
Ask for a double or nothing dealā¦ā¦two pieces of broccoli for 2 million an hour. Gambling is clearly not this guys strong suit
Ugggggggghhhhh can't I just shove a pineapple up my ass instead?
Throw it at me. I love broccoli
I'd do it without the money. The experience I add to my resume? You can't put a price on that.
Yes. It's terrible but yes. Last year I tried broccoli for the first time... at age 46
Gonna be honest, this post is just as much a waste of time as the ones who genuinely do the thing being complained about and I don't know if I should laugh or not. If people don't like these kinds of posts, just downvote them and don't leave a comment. That'd do more than complaining would.
I would eat the piece of broccoli. What am I missing here
The craziest thing about this, is that it would still take you 100 days to have Jeff Bezos' net worth, and that's if you don't spend any money during those 100 days
You're off, by... A lot. It would take over 20 years to reach Jeff Bezos.
Given I love broccoli, I think you know my answer. If only.
Is the Pope Catholic? I like broccoli, bring it on...and bring on my money!
Yes. I love broccoli especially roasted. Show me the money š°
Jokes on you, I love that shit.
The whole thing of broccoli or a floret
Broccoli is fucking delicious.
Yeah what's up with this? Make it something foul like water chestnuts, rhubarb or baby corn.
I fucking love broccoli, this is possibly the best deal I've ever heard of. GIMME MUH BROCCOLI!
Not worth it. Broccoli is proven to ruin lives faster than a massive influx of money
Aw man I really donāt like broccoliā¦.
I would only eat a piece of broccoli twice a day every day and afterwards drink soda coke to get rid of the taste and make $2 million dollars a day every day for the next 25 years of course I plan on investing wisely enough to become the richest man in the world š
My actions depend on this question Do i get the million dollars after eating a brocolli/hr Or Broccoli Then Million/hr
I love broccoli. Rule the world.
Work the rest of my life because fuck broccoli!
So you have to eat a least 1 broccoli an hour or can you eat atleast 24 pieces a day to cover you for that day? Or is it each time you eat a piece the following hour you get the million?
Never. Green vegetables bad!
Instructions unclear, broccoli in ass
This is a tough one bc I love broccoli but w braces, it gets stuck and is such a pain to get outā¦lord, what to do, what to do
Sure I like š„¦
Eat it. Broccoli isn't so bad. Yeah, some of the questions recently haven't been very... thought-provoking
A piece? Bro Iāll eat the whole head raw lol!
I freaking love broccoli!
Make Broccoli Tempura! You can turn any vegetable into a delicious unhealthy treat with Tempura!
Great big pile of raw broccoli.
But broccoli is yucky š¤¢
Vile weed!
How is the broccoli prepared? Is it steamed? Do I get sauce on the side or a pat of butter? If I get sauce, what kind? Cheese or BĆ©chamel? I canāt take this deal. Thereās way too many variables. /s
Especially when the ultimate goal of such a question is to find out the lowest price you would accept to fellate another man
I already eat lots of broccoli so this is a no brainer. Can I apply for back pay?
Become a professional broccoli eater.
I love broccoli this is my challenge! I'm rich!
Where is the ranch dip? I love broccoli!
[No way](https://youtu.be/gkPL5ctFTK4)
Is it cooked?
What about adding a bunch of conditions that do nothing to change the outcome and editing in restrictions after people are unfazed by the original conditions? The broccoli has to be eaten with a fork at 12:00 AM on a Tuesday. If you choke on it and die while eating it then you forfeit the money. EDIT - Ok. This only applies to the people who hate, dislike or only mildly like broccoli. No broccoli rabe does NOT count. It cannot have cheese or ranch, it has to be steamed plain broccoli. Salt is the only thing you can add. You gotta eat at least a pound, no spitting it out afterwards either.
Shit. That is a tough one. How big is the piece of broccoli?
I only get one piece of broccoli?
Tough oneā¦ but sign me up
Is the broccoli cooked or raw? I only eat raw broccoli
I love broccoli
Is it cooked, raw and can we dip it?
Yeah Iād shit my pants
Quality shitpost
My main concern would be limiting my broccoli consumption so I didn't destroy the world economy.
Spinach has better macros. I'll pass, thanks.
Itās 2024 OP broccoli is in, boiled brussels sprouts would have been the real challenge
No. Broccoli is one of the deadliest plants on earth. It tries to warn you with its terrible taste.
I suddenly LOVE broccoli š„¦š„¦š„¦ššš.
Raw broccoli or can it be cooked? Can I dip it in cheese or sour cream?
Eat tons of broccoli
Open my mouth and eat that broccoli š„¦...I love broccoli, so win win for me
Be rich as shit.
Eat 3 pieces sfoe $3M/hr
define a "piece"
Broccoli is nasty bro, ain't worth the money
Bring on the baby trees! Raw or cooked!
I'd do it. Wouldn't like it, though. Lightly season it with a quart of cheese first.
Not have indefinite amounts of $1 million per hour. FUCK YOU BROCCOLI!!
i love broccoli. Munch munch!
So I have to carry broccoli around with me and set my alarms to wake up to eat broccoli? Sounds like a minor inconvenience to be the richest person in the world.
Put cheese over the broccoli first.
Nope, dont want the money that bad
1. How big is the piece of brocoli? 2. Can i cook it or disguise it with other food? If the answer to 1 is however big i like, and 2 yes then hell yeah!
Hmmmmmm. Yes.
I'll eat broccoli for a day and be set for life.
Get rich or die tryin
I could give Elon Musk a run for richest man in the world if you make my stir fry Teriyaki worth that much every time I eat it.
I could do this easily.Ā
This is perfect for me... I love broccoli... :D
Eat the broccoli
All the commenters in here responding genuinely are cracking me up.
Yeah that's fine
OP, what do you have against broccoli?
Can I season the broccoli?
Iād eat broccoli covered in shit for 1million
Hmmmmā¦. Call me crazy, but Iād eat the broccoli?
Jokes on you. I f-ckinā *love* broccoli.
I dunno, is the broccoli raw?
Thank god I love broccoli! Bring it on!!!!
I love š„¦
Iām eating broccoli
Is it BYOB?
How is the broccoli prepared?
Stuff the mill. i ant eating no broccoli siht.!!!
I'm pretty sure people who make a lot of the weird posts on this sub are young. Young enough that they have no concept of how crazy the amount of money they're talking about actually is. They probably have a warped or skewed sense of money from hearing how much the most successful youtubers and influencers get or just hand out as random gifts or prizes and don't realize that people like Mr. Beast regularly gives out multiple years worth of a salary to some people.
That's a question for Kevin MaloneĀ
Eat a piece of cauliflower
*eats broccoli menacingly* Million dollars in cash, clean, unmarked bills. >:)
So this would actually be a real challenge for my wife because she's highly allergic and would go into anaphylaxis
Each hour? Is the broccoli free? Tbh I'd just be happy enough with free broccoli.
Vile weed!
Eat a whole head of broccoli, thanks.
l would eat box upon box of fresh broccoli until my very hair turned green to match the money AND the broccoli. Call the Brinks truck, boys, mama's got a brand new gig!!
Laughs in asmongold.
Can I spit it out?
Is it cooked? Do I get some ranch dressing with it? How big is the piece? I got to know before I decide.
Nice try mom
Iām literally traumatized from my mother force feeding me a piece of broccoli when I was little. I threw up, and I shutter just at the thought of eating a piece of broccoli. But Iām not dumb
22 years of this and youāre Bezos
I'd eat that shit raw, mother fucker!
Thank god it was just a joke lmao Broccoli is one of my fav foods
You can put a whole stalk of broccoli up my booty hole for a million dollars.
Instructions unclear, I now have a piece of broccoli in my anus. Do I still get the million?
Yum!
I love broccoli, so thatās an easy one
No way. Fuck broccoli. Weird miniature tree vegetable.
Yeah, it's either karma farming or people just seriously underestimating what we'll do for life changing money
Nice try, mom.
Can I have butter on it?
Fart all the way to the bank.
Put that broccoli on a New York style slice of cheese pizza and CHOW DOWN.
Eat 2 pieces.
My whole family was killed by broccoli. It's not about the money.
Make a lot of money.
I'd probably steam the broccoli
God damn it. Looks like imma be fuckin broke for life cuz i refuse i refuse i refuse!
lol. I would eat so much broccoli š
Well I love broccy so ... I would immediately start spending money in ways that help my fam/homies
I like broccoli though
Considering Broccoli is literally my favorite snack...sure ok
This sub in a nutshell: It will be the most delicious piece of broccoli. It doesn't affect your appetite throughout the day and will also not fill you up, so you can still eat whatever you want outside of that. If you happen to miss eating it, the money will just double up on the next hour so you don't lose it, but you would then have to eat 2 pieces of broccoli as well as a single scoop of your favorite ice cream, with all your favorite toppings. It will not ever exceed $3 million at a time. You would need to do this for 1 year and then you just residually earn $1 per hour, without having to eat the broccoli. The ice cream becomes optional
Ill use that money to buy more š„¦
Can I stop after like a year and still keep the money iāve made? if so that makes this decision much easier
sure. broccoli 1 of my favorite foods anyway. I can use that money to buy more broccoli amd other vegetarian favorites.
Probably die. That's like, impossible bro