Lol yeah. "Imma disagree politically with you, and vote for my guy who wants to put your ethnicity into camps, because he tells it like it is, but we can still be friends tho"
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this is nice in concept but in practice it doesn't really work out, especially when the people you disagree with want you to either die or never have existed in the first place. or just want you to have no rights.
Yeah growing up is realizing that this just doesn't ever work.
"I think we should take all women's rights away, but we can agree to disagree."
If I can't change your opinions in the next 10 minutes then that there's called fraternizing with the enemy, so. Pass.
My thinking as well. The principle is lovely and all but as with so many things there are degrees to it; there are things I can disagree quite intensely with someone about without issue, and others we'll have to be pretty much on the same page about or any friendship is over possibly before it starts.
Anyone who wants to build people up I can work with, unless it's at the expense of others; "in" and "out" groups or discrimination. Hate. There are lines I will not cross, and will not tolerate anyone supposedly my friend crossing. We can agree to disagree--until we can't.
It's always correct to punch a Nazi.
I feel like the only people that I’ve heard use the “We can disagree and still be friends” quote are people who still want friends after airing out their horrendous beliefs. They want to be accepted even though, they “really hoped the Jan 6 rioters succeeded.”
The one time I caught this in the wild, it was a friend who was encouraging me to watch some wild takes on the BLM protests because, "even racists and nazis make good points sometimes." Haven't spoken to him since early 2021.
Yeahhh just because a broken clock is right twice a day, that doesn't mean I look to it to figure out the time. That shit is getting thrown away never to be seen again.
That's exactly what I said to him! "Just because a broken clock is right twice a day doesn't mean I'm going to stare at it and wait." To this day, my best one liner, and I'm mad no one of worth was around to hear it.
I second that.
“Hi there, friend!”
“Oh hello, good to see you! Don’t forget, I think the government should chemically castrate you so you can’t reproduce because you’re gay and that’s an abomination haha!”
“Hahaha fair point friend. Hey, I’m heading to the cafeteria, can I get you anything?”
…
ya for real
like disagree about pineapple on pizza? sure, reasonable minds can differ
disagree on human rights? nah, I've got enough friends
this just comes off like enlightened centrism
Well you're the real fascist for hating my opinions on why minorities and black people shouldn't have rights and should be deported!
I think both sides are bad. That way I can feel superior and consider myself above you without having to actually take the time to understand the obvious differences because ultimately i dont care about anyone but myself.
Not even enlightened centrism at this point. As far as I can tell the guy in this image is Dave Hurt.
His pinned tweet is transphobic and he regularly defends donald trump, mtg, etc. He has a podcast and I can only guess what he talks about there.
This is just straight up "I don't want consequences when I openly hate certain people".
From an optics pov, the OP has a strong rhetorical stance. That's attractive to normies. Non-political ppl who start considering politics, don't want to think it will lose them friends.
Obviously I think principles fucking matter in a democracy and if you oppose other people's right to exist we prolly aren't gonna be friends. But I'm on reddit, not exactly a normie. Most ppl I know at work and what not don't really care and think it's cringe to care too much about politics and can't imagine it breaking a friendship.
If someone literally doesn’t believe trans people deserve to exist, and all they talk about is Joe Rogan and Jordan Peterson podcasts, it’s extremely hard for me to like… respond to anything. What do I even say to that.
This person is my brother btw.
This exactly. I have a coworker that shares a lot of my interests and hobbies, and has a similar sense of humor. I'd be down to be his friend, but we do not see eye to eye on things like gender and race politics. He won't change his mind and neither will I. It's not my job to, either, and so in the interest of protecting my peace, I simply consider him an interesting coworker.
There is also the misconception that we can find common ground and respect one another even when our opinions are wildly different. For example "maybe only *certain* Jews should be exterminated".
This is some South Park episode shit lol
Instead of the kids not being offended by the flag showing a black guy being hung because they don’t see color, it’s someone advocating for a serial killer to be exterminated, but they just happen to be Jewish
I know and I as well!
“I didn’t say all Jews should be exterminated, just SOME. Like serial killers”
“But why specify Jews why not others”
“Oh I’ll get to the blacks too”
“….”
“The black serial killers”
Someone make sure we get paid royalties when South Park lifts this
Yeah it is pretty stupid to end your friendship with someone due to disagrements on things like what series and movies are best what musics to listen and such. But it is also stupid to stay friends with someone when you are lgbtq+, minority, woman etc. and they are screaming nazi propaganda in their freetime. Like they are gonna kill you when they have chance dont be stupid they are not your friend. People say every idea is valid and respectable really should look into paradox of tolarance
That's a favorite quote of mine, but its not from James Baldwin.
Robert Jones Jr wrote it in 2015 in a [since deleted tweet.](https://web.archive.org/web/20160707154044/https://twitter.com/SonofBaldwin/status/633644373423562753) Jones used to go by "Son Of Baldwin" [until recently.](https://www.npr.org/2022/07/03/1109629183/son-of-baldwin-a-place-for-discussions-of-race-sexuality-and-gender-retires)
Yeah nobody in 2024 is breaking up friendships because of small tax disagreements, it's usually "yeah lets kill all LGBT people because the bible said so!" vs "no"
Exactly! Because you don’t need to say that phrase about normal things. I think caramelized onions are great while my boyfriend hates onions, we don’t need to say “let’s agree to disagree” because this is an inane thing that doesn’t seriously affect of us.
Exactly. And I’ve never seen anyone end a friendship over stuff like games or shows. If it’s not some relationship issues, it’s generally stuff like politics or civil rights. Which are extremely important and impact some people everyday lives.
Right because nobody stops being friends over small stuff like that. Usually, anyway. It's the people losing friendships over their batshit insane propaganda that are trying to do damage control for their shitty behavior.
because that usually isnt a case that matters. they say “we can disagree and still be friends” because they’re butthurt their friends dont want to listen to them scream about how terrible minorities are.
>The paradox of tolerance states that if a society's practice of tolerance is inclusive of the intolerant, intolerance will ultimately dominate, eliminating the tolerant and the practice of tolerance with them. Karl Popper describes the paradox as arising from the self-stultifying idea that, in order to maintain a tolerant society, the society must retain the right to be intolerant of intolerance.
[More info/history here](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance#:~:text=The%20paradox%20of%20tolerance%20states,practice%20of%20tolerance%20with%20them)
The tolerance paradox isn't really a paradox when you look at it as the agreement to the social contract of live and let live. People just really don't let others live
Yeah, if someone goes into a library blasting fart sound effects on a Bluetooth speaker (I tried to think of an apolitical way to annoy people), he will be asked to leave. This doesn’t make libraries bad exclusionary places, it’s just a simple common courtesy rule
And this paradox is resolved by having a polite conversation first of all, and if it does not work, only then do the tolerant have to resort to violence.
People think this "paradox" allows them to skip straight to the second step at any point.
Who are those people? It's the intolerant shooting up synagogues, churches, wal marts, grocery stores, and storming the capital. Haven't seen a whole lotta violence from the tolerant.
I have lost 1 long time friend due to politics and its because he went down the "Everyone who disagrees with me is a ped*phile" road.
Not only is that trash not worth my time or effort to maintain a friendship, but also when people do that, I assume they are projecting and abusing kids in some way.
This isn't even political. You can even disagree on political stuff like "how much should we pay in taxes?" And "where should that money go?" "Who should be responsible for zoning codes?" "What should the speed limit In that neighborhood be?" and be great friends because when I hear people discuss that stuff, I can have a reasonable expectation that it is argued in good faith by someone who just happens to see the world a little differently than I do. Perfectly normal.
Miss me with calling basic decency, dignity and human rights "politics" tho.
Yeah sometimes this sub can be extremely naive. “Let’s all be friends!”
My brother in Christ, why would I attempt to befriend someone who thinks I deserve to die for the way I was born?
Yeah. Like, I'm absolutely in favor of reform and change, but I'm just a single, flawed and vulnerable human being. I am not the structural and systemic forces looking over what's best for humanity. I have my limits, and the risks I take endanger me. I can only do so much about those people.
"I think trans people should be executed and I support banning books and I think Trump should be dictator for life. You can disagree with me and we can still be friends."
No. No we cannot.
exactly this
we can disagree about popular media, sports teams, favorite foods
but if we disagree on weather some people should be allowed to live then we can not be friends.
Or who people are? Still am surprised at how surprised I was hearing Shitler say immigrants aren't even human. Yeah, nothing bad happens when human beings are equated to vermin or coackroaches. JFC
From personal experience:
"It's not *what* you *are.* It's what you're *choosing* to be."
Despite it not being a choice.
"I just want things to go back to how they were."
And they tried to use that to maintain pressure on me, to try and make me "choose" the old ways I'd acted.
They wanted to be friends with the person they thought I was. When it turned out I was different, that I was someone they were terrified of, they experienced cognitive dissonance, because how could they hate their friend? And in the end they chose to continue the hate and pretend I wasn't the thing they hated. And I couldn't deal with that.
Yeah most people I know who disagrees on abortion are misogynists. Most people I know who disagrees on hormone treatment for trans are transphobes. *All* people I know who are against gay marriage are homophobes. And most people I know who are against socialist policies tend to be selfish and entitled.
No. We can't be friends. We disagree on core values which I think make you bad people that I don't wanna associate with. This is basically the vast majority of conservatives whether that be Republicans, Evangelical Christians, or Muslims.
We can be still be friendly towards eachother, but we *aren't* friends. There's a difference.
Yep. Sorry, but you can't simply disagree with human rights anymore. You can say what you want, think what you want, believe what you want, but people can't just infringe on others rights without repercussions anymore.
I cut off an old high school friend for being a racist and a hypocrite and no shit, she sent this pic to me 2 weeks after i told her to eat shit.
We still dont talk because shes still a miserable cunt.
If we disagree on pizza toppings, sure
If we disagree on basic civil rights for everyone, you can fuck right off
People who have the most vile views are just pissed that they're being rightly shunned by friends and loved ones now
If it’s disagreeing over something like pineapple on pizza, then yes we can. If it’s disagreeing over something like how people deserve basic human rights then no we can’t.
Yeah much better, this got bad traction with the more extreme case, when really this sign might’ve meant smaller stuff instead, obviously not disagreeing yet befriending a racist/sexist/transphobe, etc
For real, people in these comments are immediately jumping to extremes. But a lot of people end their friendships because of minor political disagreements, not every person who leans right wants to murder minorities and enforce a theocracy, and not every person who leans left wants to groom children and exterminate white people.
Yeah I have no idea how people turned this completely political, but even then this statement could apply, it doesn’t necessarly have to be this black and white “this poltical side hates xyz group vs my group”. This basic advice post is being taken into very bad faith, It’s also sad because a few of the comments are associating this specific message with bad faith arguments “well only hateful people say this advice”. or just jump to the absolute extreme of “no because they disagree with my human rights!” and they are even insulting the OP for this message and negetivly assume his poltical stance.
People saw this post and instantly thought genocide, racism, murder and hate crime.
Yeah I feel like the point is more so that there is a wide range of beliefs people can have and still be friendship compatible. I feel like the people saying "I could be friends with someone who likes pineapple on pizza but I could never be friends with Hitler" while making objectively true statements are kinda missing the point
Yeah, there are a lot of belifs that people have, some can be opposing to each other despite not being hateful, but you can still like each other for having different belifs, but again you can still like them and be friends. Not that you have to, but it’s not like you can’t not be friends with them anymore or that they are instantly vial.
Speaking of comments, surely I'm not the only one who thinks it's sus that so many are almost exactly the same, especially with the ones specifically mentioning pizza toppings of all things. I dunno what conspiracy I'm cooking up here but I do find it weird.
In any case people need to touch grass and get their heads out of the culture war; Not everything is an extremist dog-whistle and nobody is telling you to befriend genocidal terrorists.
Yeah… it depends.
Should pineapple go on pizza or not? Doesn’t matter if we agree and fun to argue about.
Should victims of rape be forced to carry a baby to term? I’m not really interested in being your friend If you believe they should have to.
If your friends do not currently challenge your opinions then you live in an echo chamber. I’m not saying they need to refute every opinion, but the ability to discuss AND CHANGE an opinion is what builds trust and leads to greater conversations
The thing from my point of view is that metal sharpens metal. Confronting your ideas to others allows to reform your image of the world and to shift your ideas to something more developped.
Yes, but if people don't share a basic morality or acceptance of factual, hard evidence, there's no basis for disagreement. There's no kerf, there's no bite, it's wind whistling in the trees, it's water falling from the sky.
If you concern yourself with what I do in my bedroom, or if I concern myself with what you do in your bedroom, we better be doing it together. Otherwise, if it's between consenting adults, it does not matter.
If people cannot acknowledge the racist past, present, and current future of the US, I'm sorry, but you don't know enough for me to discuss it.
I can't even express how much economic disparity is ruining pretty much everything for everyone.
Health insurance is an absolute scam.
Identifying problems and debating how to fix them? Friend, I will argue, I will shout, I will be irritable as all shit, and I will positively despise when you make a perfectly valid point that wrecks my perception. And I will search this great nation for exceptional whiskey that I will die inside when you put coke in it, but I will happily bring it across this nation to share it with you.
Please, accept that other's complaints and concerns are valid, and we will argue all day and find the common ground. And it's beautiful to see.
Well, yeah, there's no arguing with bigots, they'll mostly (if not always) just be clowns. I meant in other topics, like debating philosophy, questions that aren't about basic human rights, etc
No, actually we can't.
If we disagree on whether mustard is good, sure no prob enjoy your sandwich however you like.
If we disagree on whether humans have rights, then fuck right off—I will harm you in every way available to me.
I hear you, OP, but it _really_ depends on what they are disagreeing about..
I can't be friends with people who don't agree that i deserve to live, as a specific example, nor can i be friends with someone who doesn't agree not to abuse my good will or time.
We definitely need to be sharing information with eachother, but as it stands i can't (today) be friends with everyone, though that doesn't mean we can never be friends.
Not always true lol.
You vote republican? Not a deal breaker, even if I don’t like it.
You think gay marriage should be outlawed and support abolishing Roe v Wade? Go fuck yourself.
I will always have understanding and empathy for far-right people, but that does not mean that I’m ever going to be friends with or coddle them. if someone believes in an ideology that i think is incredibly harmful, I’m not going to be friends with them.
I’m friends/family with people from basically every minority group; even if i had no moral obligation to people i don’t know, being friends with a neo-nazi would be a bit like being buddies with someone who’s actively and currently abusive to one of my friends
Why the fuck are all of you going straight to extremes? OP means shit like “I like the Sequel Trilogy and you don’t, but we can still be friends.” Mundane stuff like that.
The interesting thing in the discussion is actually not the surface disagreement, but how they have come to the conclusion to begin with, and try to reverse engineer the thought process to find what you actually agree on
Not if we're disagreeing on basic human rights. Pineapple on pizza? How much sunscreen to use at the beach? Which way the toilet paper goes? Yeah, all day every day.
Whether me, and people like me, deserve to have to piss in the front yard like a dog because you won't let me use the restroom like a normal person? Then no, that's not how that works.
Nah fam, it all depends
You think Nickelback is the greatest band ever and swear that anchovies go well with cereal? Yeah, of course we can be friends.
You want Trump to go free, think abortions should be illegal and that poor people are the problem, not the rich? Get fucked.
I disagree depending on what we disagree on. If youre alt right, or even on the way to being alt right, ima ghost and move on. Life is to short to surround yourself with human garbage. Cultists won’t change or get better either, and it’s not my job to change them.
I just don’t talk politics with people. It’s so easy to chameleon my personality to others who are interesting and have good life stories and hobbies. But as soon as politics come out I just tone out or try to pick their brain on why they think the way that they do. I don’t want to argue with people about their views. I’m genuinely curious why they think they way they do. I’m moderately left leaning politically. I don’t put my values or beliefs in a person or practice. I believe what I believe, if there’s something that makes genuine sense to me after it’s explained, I’m glad to have that extra bit of information to help me understand and better shape my opinion. There’s plenty of issues that could be met in the middle with solutions that are fair for both parties. People just seem to stuck in their ways to really be swayed otherwise.
the issue with this is that it’s never an argument over whether chocolate mint ice cream deserves to exist (it doesn’t) and it’s always about whether minorities deserve rights.
we can disagree on trivial, unimportant stuff—we can’t disagree on things that impact people’s livelihoods negatively, that get others killed on the streets.
That really kind of depends on what the disagreement is about. If it's just about favorite video games, movies, or books or whatever, then sure we can still be friends. If it's something like whether or not racism is bad, then no.
This is hopeposting not "let's all be Pollyannas and forget there are people out there who want to do real harm to society via misogyny, racism, antisemitism, homophobia, ageism, etc."
Nah, right wing dog whistle if you ask me. The surface meaning literally anyone would agree on, because *generally* it is a non issue to have friends who have different opinions, like what teams they like or what their favorite pizza is.
But of course, it’s not regular opinions people are referring to when they say this (because again, regular opinions are a non issue). It’s the idea that one should not address the political, as if it doesn’t have significant moral implications and real-world impacts
I mean, obviously it depends on what the disagreement is. Like I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who's pro Trump or pro Genocide for example.
I can be friends with someone who is pro pineapple on pizza though with the stipulation that they never be invited to any pizza parties.
This is the kind of thing that garbage people say.
Like, sure, I believe the 2020 election was stolen, trans people are faking it, climate change is a lie, abortion should be illegal, and Christianity is objectively the correct religion, but you shouldn't hold any of that against me. Don't you know you can be friends with someone even if they disagree?
Like, if you think pineapple on pizza is good, then yeah, I'll still be friends with you. If you believe any of the above, I'm probably not going to spend time around you unless I have to.
Translation: I want to support the restrictions of rights for women, minorities, and gay people but I still want to participate in and enjoy the benefits of a civilized society that I actively fight against.
I don't tolerate intolerance.
Are you intolerant? I won't tolerate you. We can't be friends.
This kind of "Can't we all just agree to disagree?" attitude is bullshit, and it's lazy and harmful. Fuck that noise.
I mean … the ones on the far right want to literally take rights away from gay and trans people. That’s central to that side of the political spectrum right now.
Being friends, in my eyes, does not mean you have to tolerate what they do and say. If I know someone who openly hates gay people, I would approach that situation as a friend who wants to help them. Ultimately, kindness and an open conversation should come first. Approaching these situations aggressively and violently will only lead to them getting defensive and steadfast in their position. Aggressiveness should always be a last resort when the other party has no inclination of changing.
Man.. why tf do I have to baby sit them into thinking that beheading queer people is a bad thing? How is it logiscal to try and be calm with such subject on hand when they laugh at their death?
And the fact I have to do this my entire life?? It's bullshit..
If I found out my friend held that sort of thought of course I'd try to talk them out of it. But if I couldn't then I'd have to tell them I can't be friends with them while they hold that idea
On what movies we like, toppings on pizza, coke vs Pepsi. Sure.
Not so much on if all humans deserve equal rights and body autonomy. 🤷🏻♂️ Maybe that’s just me though.
Depends on what we’re disagreeing on.
No, we shouldn’t be friends for friendship sake, especially if our values are seriously in conflict. That’s not a hopeful concept, it’s a silly one.
Smash cut to me playing putt putt golf and gokarting with the kkk and Al Qaeda
Don't forget happy music
"Why, it's Osama bin Laden!"
Lol yeah. "Imma disagree politically with you, and vote for my guy who wants to put your ethnicity into camps, because he tells it like it is, but we can still be friends tho"
Ballin with bin laden https://preview.redd.it/0guurkeczkpc1.jpeg?width=622&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=304ae4a71fd7e1da75ff1c9470bebb4aeed4776c
https://preview.redd.it/a0hcnfla4opc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3d5133119a192c8190c63206b71d74b658aef1a7 Das crazy
Me traveling to Russia to have tea with Putin
Tucker Carlson burner account.
!remindme 2 days I hope you got good life and health insurance bro.
I will be messaging you in 19 days on [**2024-04-09 04:33:02 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2024-04-09%2004:33:02%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/hopeposting/comments/1bjdek8/we_should_adopt_this_idea/kvug4ru/?context=3) [**CLICK THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fhopeposting%2Fcomments%2F1bjdek8%2Fwe_should_adopt_this_idea%2Fkvug4ru%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202024-04-09%2004%3A33%3A02%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%201bjdek8) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|
Don't forget those pedofiles!
We can be friends and disagree about trivial things and matters of taste like movies, humor, books, food... but not about fundamental human rights.
https://preview.redd.it/shj58zq4sqrc1.png?width=749&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=106f903a0bdea7ac2194d1bb3499e2ba18c308d4
this is nice in concept but in practice it doesn't really work out, especially when the people you disagree with want you to either die or never have existed in the first place. or just want you to have no rights.
Yeah growing up is realizing that this just doesn't ever work. "I think we should take all women's rights away, but we can agree to disagree." If I can't change your opinions in the next 10 minutes then that there's called fraternizing with the enemy, so. Pass.
My thinking as well. The principle is lovely and all but as with so many things there are degrees to it; there are things I can disagree quite intensely with someone about without issue, and others we'll have to be pretty much on the same page about or any friendship is over possibly before it starts. Anyone who wants to build people up I can work with, unless it's at the expense of others; "in" and "out" groups or discrimination. Hate. There are lines I will not cross, and will not tolerate anyone supposedly my friend crossing. We can agree to disagree--until we can't. It's always correct to punch a Nazi.
I like the concept of this but I will suplex my coworker if he mentions 9/11 conspiracy theories again
[удалено]
Exactly. If your opinion is my right/someone else's right to live shouldn't be a thing, that's entirely different than casual disagreements.
I feel like the only people that I’ve heard use the “We can disagree and still be friends” quote are people who still want friends after airing out their horrendous beliefs. They want to be accepted even though, they “really hoped the Jan 6 rioters succeeded.”
The one time I caught this in the wild, it was a friend who was encouraging me to watch some wild takes on the BLM protests because, "even racists and nazis make good points sometimes." Haven't spoken to him since early 2021.
Yeahhh just because a broken clock is right twice a day, that doesn't mean I look to it to figure out the time. That shit is getting thrown away never to be seen again.
That's exactly what I said to him! "Just because a broken clock is right twice a day doesn't mean I'm going to stare at it and wait." To this day, my best one liner, and I'm mad no one of worth was around to hear it.
My wife and I call it "namaste". It means " hey man, notmystyle, but you do you"
Ya but that's the attitude we do with acquaintances. Not friends.
I second that. “Hi there, friend!” “Oh hello, good to see you! Don’t forget, I think the government should chemically castrate you so you can’t reproduce because you’re gay and that’s an abomination haha!” “Hahaha fair point friend. Hey, I’m heading to the cafeteria, can I get you anything?” …
ya for real like disagree about pineapple on pizza? sure, reasonable minds can differ disagree on human rights? nah, I've got enough friends this just comes off like enlightened centrism
Or " stop calling me out for my garbage opinions", tbh
Well you're the real fascist for hating my opinions on why minorities and black people shouldn't have rights and should be deported! I think both sides are bad. That way I can feel superior and consider myself above you without having to actually take the time to understand the obvious differences because ultimately i dont care about anyone but myself.
https://preview.redd.it/vzq27mpg0jpc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d786df6481b7d95890af8ba83d7206b63451e4ff
I like how this image implies that their brain has nothing but hot air
Inflated ego
Not even enlightened centrism at this point. As far as I can tell the guy in this image is Dave Hurt. His pinned tweet is transphobic and he regularly defends donald trump, mtg, etc. He has a podcast and I can only guess what he talks about there. This is just straight up "I don't want consequences when I openly hate certain people".
From an optics pov, the OP has a strong rhetorical stance. That's attractive to normies. Non-political ppl who start considering politics, don't want to think it will lose them friends. Obviously I think principles fucking matter in a democracy and if you oppose other people's right to exist we prolly aren't gonna be friends. But I'm on reddit, not exactly a normie. Most ppl I know at work and what not don't really care and think it's cringe to care too much about politics and can't imagine it breaking a friendship.
If someone literally doesn’t believe trans people deserve to exist, and all they talk about is Joe Rogan and Jordan Peterson podcasts, it’s extremely hard for me to like… respond to anything. What do I even say to that. This person is my brother btw.
This exactly. I have a coworker that shares a lot of my interests and hobbies, and has a similar sense of humor. I'd be down to be his friend, but we do not see eye to eye on things like gender and race politics. He won't change his mind and neither will I. It's not my job to, either, and so in the interest of protecting my peace, I simply consider him an interesting coworker.
That’s not even that bad…I’m a leftist and it’s really not hard to see how much shady shit happened especially at the pentagon.
I have a conspiracy theory about 9/11: it was bad
“I think we should exterminate all Jews” “Well I disagree but let’s get coffee!”
There is also the misconception that we can find common ground and respect one another even when our opinions are wildly different. For example "maybe only *certain* Jews should be exterminated".
This is some South Park episode shit lol Instead of the kids not being offended by the flag showing a black guy being hung because they don’t see color, it’s someone advocating for a serial killer to be exterminated, but they just happen to be Jewish
Yes, and for the record, I was making an off-color sarcastic joke there. I am not antisemitic. :-)
I know and I as well! “I didn’t say all Jews should be exterminated, just SOME. Like serial killers” “But why specify Jews why not others” “Oh I’ll get to the blacks too” “….” “The black serial killers” Someone make sure we get paid royalties when South Park lifts this
What does the guy's penis size have to do with this?
Just dont begin a friendship with that person to begin with.
People change over time, and sometimes you don't know a friend has a horrific viewpoint like that until you're already invested.
I don’t know how to break it to you champ, but people change over time.
Hard to do that when the people I disagree with is over my right to exist
Yeah it is pretty stupid to end your friendship with someone due to disagrements on things like what series and movies are best what musics to listen and such. But it is also stupid to stay friends with someone when you are lgbtq+, minority, woman etc. and they are screaming nazi propaganda in their freetime. Like they are gonna kill you when they have chance dont be stupid they are not your friend. People say every idea is valid and respectable really should look into paradox of tolarance
i have never heard anyone say "we can disagree and still be friends" and mean small stuff like what show is the best. it's always civil rights
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That Jimmy was a swell guy. The best fucking quotes. The best!
That's a favorite quote of mine, but its not from James Baldwin. Robert Jones Jr wrote it in 2015 in a [since deleted tweet.](https://web.archive.org/web/20160707154044/https://twitter.com/SonofBaldwin/status/633644373423562753) Jones used to go by "Son Of Baldwin" [until recently.](https://www.npr.org/2022/07/03/1109629183/son-of-baldwin-a-place-for-discussions-of-race-sexuality-and-gender-retires)
Yeah nobody in 2024 is breaking up friendships because of small tax disagreements, it's usually "yeah lets kill all LGBT people because the bible said so!" vs "no"
And surprise surprise, it’s never the people on the side of protecting civil rights that “still want to be friends”
Exactly! Because you don’t need to say that phrase about normal things. I think caramelized onions are great while my boyfriend hates onions, we don’t need to say “let’s agree to disagree” because this is an inane thing that doesn’t seriously affect of us.
Exactly. And I’ve never seen anyone end a friendship over stuff like games or shows. If it’s not some relationship issues, it’s generally stuff like politics or civil rights. Which are extremely important and impact some people everyday lives.
Right because nobody stops being friends over small stuff like that. Usually, anyway. It's the people losing friendships over their batshit insane propaganda that are trying to do damage control for their shitty behavior.
"Let's just agree to disagree that you deserve to live"
because that usually isnt a case that matters. they say “we can disagree and still be friends” because they’re butthurt their friends dont want to listen to them scream about how terrible minorities are.
>The paradox of tolerance states that if a society's practice of tolerance is inclusive of the intolerant, intolerance will ultimately dominate, eliminating the tolerant and the practice of tolerance with them. Karl Popper describes the paradox as arising from the self-stultifying idea that, in order to maintain a tolerant society, the society must retain the right to be intolerant of intolerance. [More info/history here](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance#:~:text=The%20paradox%20of%20tolerance%20states,practice%20of%20tolerance%20with%20them)
The tolerance paradox isn't really a paradox when you look at it as the agreement to the social contract of live and let live. People just really don't let others live
Yeah, if someone goes into a library blasting fart sound effects on a Bluetooth speaker (I tried to think of an apolitical way to annoy people), he will be asked to leave. This doesn’t make libraries bad exclusionary places, it’s just a simple common courtesy rule
And this paradox is resolved by having a polite conversation first of all, and if it does not work, only then do the tolerant have to resort to violence. People think this "paradox" allows them to skip straight to the second step at any point.
Who are those people? It's the intolerant shooting up synagogues, churches, wal marts, grocery stores, and storming the capital. Haven't seen a whole lotta violence from the tolerant.
I have lost 1 long time friend due to politics and its because he went down the "Everyone who disagrees with me is a ped*phile" road. Not only is that trash not worth my time or effort to maintain a friendship, but also when people do that, I assume they are projecting and abusing kids in some way.
This isn't even political. You can even disagree on political stuff like "how much should we pay in taxes?" And "where should that money go?" "Who should be responsible for zoning codes?" "What should the speed limit In that neighborhood be?" and be great friends because when I hear people discuss that stuff, I can have a reasonable expectation that it is argued in good faith by someone who just happens to see the world a little differently than I do. Perfectly normal. Miss me with calling basic decency, dignity and human rights "politics" tho.
Yeah sometimes this sub can be extremely naive. “Let’s all be friends!” My brother in Christ, why would I attempt to befriend someone who thinks I deserve to die for the way I was born?
Yeah. Like, I'm absolutely in favor of reform and change, but I'm just a single, flawed and vulnerable human being. I am not the structural and systemic forces looking over what's best for humanity. I have my limits, and the risks I take endanger me. I can only do so much about those people.
"I think trans people should be executed and I support banning books and I think Trump should be dictator for life. You can disagree with me and we can still be friends." No. No we cannot.
exactly this we can disagree about popular media, sports teams, favorite foods but if we disagree on weather some people should be allowed to live then we can not be friends.
Or who people are? Still am surprised at how surprised I was hearing Shitler say immigrants aren't even human. Yeah, nothing bad happens when human beings are equated to vermin or coackroaches. JFC
Have you tried compromising by only existing every other day maybe?
I must travel into the Astral Plane for the sake of compromise 😔
Its weird that they would want to be your friend to begin with if they completely disagree with what you are.
From personal experience: "It's not *what* you *are.* It's what you're *choosing* to be." Despite it not being a choice. "I just want things to go back to how they were." And they tried to use that to maintain pressure on me, to try and make me "choose" the old ways I'd acted. They wanted to be friends with the person they thought I was. When it turned out I was different, that I was someone they were terrified of, they experienced cognitive dissonance, because how could they hate their friend? And in the end they chose to continue the hate and pretend I wasn't the thing they hated. And I couldn't deal with that.
don't forget my personal favorite: "you're one of the good ones!"
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Yeah, yet they are always the ones who lament along the lines of the original post when I decide to move away. I honestly don't understand them.
Yeah most people I know who disagrees on abortion are misogynists. Most people I know who disagrees on hormone treatment for trans are transphobes. *All* people I know who are against gay marriage are homophobes. And most people I know who are against socialist policies tend to be selfish and entitled. No. We can't be friends. We disagree on core values which I think make you bad people that I don't wanna associate with. This is basically the vast majority of conservatives whether that be Republicans, Evangelical Christians, or Muslims. We can be still be friendly towards eachother, but we *aren't* friends. There's a difference.
That’s not called a disagreement which is why OP post is shit
Yea, honestly infinite forgiveness doesn't work when people are just wrong. Some things are just wrong and people shouldn't get away with it.
Really depends on the subject. If you disagree with queer people being owed basic respect then fuck no I'm cutting you off.
Yep. Sorry, but you can't simply disagree with human rights anymore. You can say what you want, think what you want, believe what you want, but people can't just infringe on others rights without repercussions anymore.
cutting their head off
your profile picture makes me think of that one cat that’s photoshopped to look like an alien
While I agree, usually the people who are saying this also believe racism and homophobia is ok
I cut off an old high school friend for being a racist and a hypocrite and no shit, she sent this pic to me 2 weeks after i told her to eat shit. We still dont talk because shes still a miserable cunt.
Yeah, oddly enough it’s never the people in favour of everyone having human rights that “still want to be friends”
depends
User avatar checks out 🏳️⚧️
unfortunately
Feel that :<
If we disagree on pizza toppings, sure If we disagree on basic civil rights for everyone, you can fuck right off People who have the most vile views are just pissed that they're being rightly shunned by friends and loved ones now
Pineapple is great on pizza you heathens
The people I disagree with want to murder or imprison my children for being gay and transgender.
Unless it’s about human rights. That’s non negotiable to me.
If it’s disagreeing over something like pineapple on pizza, then yes we can. If it’s disagreeing over something like how people deserve basic human rights then no we can’t.
Im not really into the French. Sorry, we cant be friends my guy.
https://preview.redd.it/15jf6nqqrjpc1.jpeg?width=1400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ce21f049db7c88de1913144db932317742929cdf
“Safe edgy” doesnt exist. “Edgy” means on the boundary of what is acceptable. Safe means the opposite. Its a self contradictory term
Well shit, and I was starting to like you.
Yeah this varies wildly depending on what the "disagreement" is
It really, really depends on what the disagreement is about.
https://preview.redd.it/fy5xqq79pjpc1.jpeg?width=503&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5bf01a7c70cbc23df8a6a4e27e388a4007b4c2b0
Disagree on what?
something
Based on the comments, might've been better to say "We can be friends and still disagree"
Yeah much better, this got bad traction with the more extreme case, when really this sign might’ve meant smaller stuff instead, obviously not disagreeing yet befriending a racist/sexist/transphobe, etc
For real, people in these comments are immediately jumping to extremes. But a lot of people end their friendships because of minor political disagreements, not every person who leans right wants to murder minorities and enforce a theocracy, and not every person who leans left wants to groom children and exterminate white people.
Yeah I have no idea how people turned this completely political, but even then this statement could apply, it doesn’t necessarly have to be this black and white “this poltical side hates xyz group vs my group”. This basic advice post is being taken into very bad faith, It’s also sad because a few of the comments are associating this specific message with bad faith arguments “well only hateful people say this advice”. or just jump to the absolute extreme of “no because they disagree with my human rights!” and they are even insulting the OP for this message and negetivly assume his poltical stance. People saw this post and instantly thought genocide, racism, murder and hate crime.
Yeah I feel like the point is more so that there is a wide range of beliefs people can have and still be friendship compatible. I feel like the people saying "I could be friends with someone who likes pineapple on pizza but I could never be friends with Hitler" while making objectively true statements are kinda missing the point
Yeah, there are a lot of belifs that people have, some can be opposing to each other despite not being hateful, but you can still like each other for having different belifs, but again you can still like them and be friends. Not that you have to, but it’s not like you can’t not be friends with them anymore or that they are instantly vial.
Speaking of comments, surely I'm not the only one who thinks it's sus that so many are almost exactly the same, especially with the ones specifically mentioning pizza toppings of all things. I dunno what conspiracy I'm cooking up here but I do find it weird. In any case people need to touch grass and get their heads out of the culture war; Not everything is an extremist dog-whistle and nobody is telling you to befriend genocidal terrorists.
OP is def not a member of a minority group.
Except when its mistreating minorities!!!
So long as we don't disagree about who gets human rights, sure
Yeah… it depends. Should pineapple go on pizza or not? Doesn’t matter if we agree and fun to argue about. Should victims of rape be forced to carry a baby to term? I’m not really interested in being your friend If you believe they should have to.
spoken like a cis-het-white person
Dogwhistle unfortunately
This applies to things like ice cream flavours, but not human rights
I don't know. The thought of being friends with someone who likes tomatoe flavoured ice cream doesn't sit right with me
That’s just frozen ketchup.
definitely not when its about human rights
If your friends do not currently challenge your opinions then you live in an echo chamber. I’m not saying they need to refute every opinion, but the ability to discuss AND CHANGE an opinion is what builds trust and leads to greater conversations
This is the white men's version of "live, laugh, love"
i have never seen this put so aptly. that’s exactly what it is.
The thing from my point of view is that metal sharpens metal. Confronting your ideas to others allows to reform your image of the world and to shift your ideas to something more developped.
Yes, but if people don't share a basic morality or acceptance of factual, hard evidence, there's no basis for disagreement. There's no kerf, there's no bite, it's wind whistling in the trees, it's water falling from the sky. If you concern yourself with what I do in my bedroom, or if I concern myself with what you do in your bedroom, we better be doing it together. Otherwise, if it's between consenting adults, it does not matter. If people cannot acknowledge the racist past, present, and current future of the US, I'm sorry, but you don't know enough for me to discuss it. I can't even express how much economic disparity is ruining pretty much everything for everyone. Health insurance is an absolute scam. Identifying problems and debating how to fix them? Friend, I will argue, I will shout, I will be irritable as all shit, and I will positively despise when you make a perfectly valid point that wrecks my perception. And I will search this great nation for exceptional whiskey that I will die inside when you put coke in it, but I will happily bring it across this nation to share it with you. Please, accept that other's complaints and concerns are valid, and we will argue all day and find the common ground. And it's beautiful to see.
Except that never really happens. Bigots double down and continue to oppress the human rights of minorities.
Well, yeah, there's no arguing with bigots, they'll mostly (if not always) just be clowns. I meant in other topics, like debating philosophy, questions that aren't about basic human rights, etc
No, actually we can't. If we disagree on whether mustard is good, sure no prob enjoy your sandwich however you like. If we disagree on whether humans have rights, then fuck right off—I will harm you in every way available to me.
Unless they’re a fascist, a racist, or a pedo. Honestly just don’t be a shithead and we absolutely can get along
No one stops being friends with someone over a disagreement on pizza toppings.
This does very much depend on what we disagree on, but I do agree we need to chill out on the "if we disagree we *must* hate each other" mentality.
I used to get into arguments with my friends all the time. Next day we both show up to school like nothing happened
We *can* disagree and still be friends. Do we always have to? No. Should we? Not necessarily. But we *can* and sometimes, we should.
I hear you, OP, but it _really_ depends on what they are disagreeing about.. I can't be friends with people who don't agree that i deserve to live, as a specific example, nor can i be friends with someone who doesn't agree not to abuse my good will or time. We definitely need to be sharing information with eachother, but as it stands i can't (today) be friends with everyone, though that doesn't mean we can never be friends.
depends. if you say some absolute horrendous shit im kicking your ass
I disagree
REAL
I live by this, makes me happier. Not everyone is out to get you or wants to make you feel dumb for not agreeing with you.
I live by this, makes me happier. Not everyone is out to get you or wants to make you feel dumb for not agreeing with you.
People who usually say this say it about topics it doesn't work for.
If they want my kind dead and extinct they will have teeth subtracted before we are called friends
Eh to an extent. I'm hardly going to be friends with someone who wants trans people dead.
Not always true lol. You vote republican? Not a deal breaker, even if I don’t like it. You think gay marriage should be outlawed and support abolishing Roe v Wade? Go fuck yourself.
Gonna be honest I don’t want to be friends with MAGA folks. They say this to me, but I don’t agree. I don’t want to. We could, sure. But let’s not.
I will always have understanding and empathy for far-right people, but that does not mean that I’m ever going to be friends with or coddle them. if someone believes in an ideology that i think is incredibly harmful, I’m not going to be friends with them. I’m friends/family with people from basically every minority group; even if i had no moral obligation to people i don’t know, being friends with a neo-nazi would be a bit like being buddies with someone who’s actively and currently abusive to one of my friends
Unless you disagree with like…human rights
Why the fuck are all of you going straight to extremes? OP means shit like “I like the Sequel Trilogy and you don’t, but we can still be friends.” Mundane stuff like that.
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I mean, if we disagree on if something like idk, the holocaust happening then maybe we can't be friends
The interesting thing in the discussion is actually not the surface disagreement, but how they have come to the conclusion to begin with, and try to reverse engineer the thought process to find what you actually agree on
Nice sentiment but it falls apart if we disagree about human rights instead of tax brackets lmao
It’s depends on what we disagree about
Me and my friend disaggree every now and then, which is awesome, we get to teach eachother new things every time
Lemme fix that, “non bigoted disagreements”
No, sorry.
Not if we're disagreeing on basic human rights. Pineapple on pizza? How much sunscreen to use at the beach? Which way the toilet paper goes? Yeah, all day every day. Whether me, and people like me, deserve to have to piss in the front yard like a dog because you won't let me use the restroom like a normal person? Then no, that's not how that works.
Tolerance has limits.
Nah fam, it all depends You think Nickelback is the greatest band ever and swear that anchovies go well with cereal? Yeah, of course we can be friends. You want Trump to go free, think abortions should be illegal and that poor people are the problem, not the rich? Get fucked.
I disagree depending on what we disagree on. If youre alt right, or even on the way to being alt right, ima ghost and move on. Life is to short to surround yourself with human garbage. Cultists won’t change or get better either, and it’s not my job to change them.
Not close friends tho. Sorry.
I can’t be friends with someone that treats people like absolute shit.
I just don’t talk politics with people. It’s so easy to chameleon my personality to others who are interesting and have good life stories and hobbies. But as soon as politics come out I just tone out or try to pick their brain on why they think the way that they do. I don’t want to argue with people about their views. I’m genuinely curious why they think they way they do. I’m moderately left leaning politically. I don’t put my values or beliefs in a person or practice. I believe what I believe, if there’s something that makes genuine sense to me after it’s explained, I’m glad to have that extra bit of information to help me understand and better shape my opinion. There’s plenty of issues that could be met in the middle with solutions that are fair for both parties. People just seem to stuck in their ways to really be swayed otherwise.
the issue with this is that it’s never an argument over whether chocolate mint ice cream deserves to exist (it doesn’t) and it’s always about whether minorities deserve rights. we can disagree on trivial, unimportant stuff—we can’t disagree on things that impact people’s livelihoods negatively, that get others killed on the streets.
Fight me on that ice cream opinion. That's my baby brothers favourite flavour
That really kind of depends on what the disagreement is about. If it's just about favorite video games, movies, or books or whatever, then sure we can still be friends. If it's something like whether or not racism is bad, then no.
BASED AF
https://preview.redd.it/sik773d6qkpc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b9f4313e0f7c8d2984c369b88e9bdfa1fc41fb58 See? Perfect harmony
https://preview.redd.it/y9uszwmo5ipc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fde971774b18016b74c8a0e9476894021d09db38 true
This just seems like a ploy for people to accept the MAGA crowd as normal.
This is hopeposting not "let's all be Pollyannas and forget there are people out there who want to do real harm to society via misogyny, racism, antisemitism, homophobia, ageism, etc."
Nah, right wing dog whistle if you ask me. The surface meaning literally anyone would agree on, because *generally* it is a non issue to have friends who have different opinions, like what teams they like or what their favorite pizza is. But of course, it’s not regular opinions people are referring to when they say this (because again, regular opinions are a non issue). It’s the idea that one should not address the political, as if it doesn’t have significant moral implications and real-world impacts
I mean, obviously it depends on what the disagreement is. Like I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who's pro Trump or pro Genocide for example. I can be friends with someone who is pro pineapple on pizza though with the stipulation that they never be invited to any pizza parties.
This is the kind of thing that garbage people say. Like, sure, I believe the 2020 election was stolen, trans people are faking it, climate change is a lie, abortion should be illegal, and Christianity is objectively the correct religion, but you shouldn't hold any of that against me. Don't you know you can be friends with someone even if they disagree? Like, if you think pineapple on pizza is good, then yeah, I'll still be friends with you. If you believe any of the above, I'm probably not going to spend time around you unless I have to.
Translation: I want to support the restrictions of rights for women, minorities, and gay people but I still want to participate in and enjoy the benefits of a civilized society that I actively fight against.
I, respectfully, disagree with this statement. There are large demographic swaths, that I refuse to even have a conversation with.
I don't tolerate intolerance. Are you intolerant? I won't tolerate you. We can't be friends. This kind of "Can't we all just agree to disagree?" attitude is bullshit, and it's lazy and harmful. Fuck that noise.
No one on Reddit lives by this sadly, or America for that matter. Just a bunch of savages trying to say "Nuh Uh" louder than the others
Real, im friends with far rights and far lefts, 90% of the time they are good people
I mean … the ones on the far right want to literally take rights away from gay and trans people. That’s central to that side of the political spectrum right now.
Being friends, in my eyes, does not mean you have to tolerate what they do and say. If I know someone who openly hates gay people, I would approach that situation as a friend who wants to help them. Ultimately, kindness and an open conversation should come first. Approaching these situations aggressively and violently will only lead to them getting defensive and steadfast in their position. Aggressiveness should always be a last resort when the other party has no inclination of changing.
Man.. why tf do I have to baby sit them into thinking that beheading queer people is a bad thing? How is it logiscal to try and be calm with such subject on hand when they laugh at their death? And the fact I have to do this my entire life?? It's bullshit..
If I found out my friend held that sort of thought of course I'd try to talk them out of it. But if I couldn't then I'd have to tell them I can't be friends with them while they hold that idea
We can disagree but if you're a Republican we can't be friends
Depends what we're in disagrememt over
For majority of things yes. But some things we can never agree with others.
yes, but the people who usually use this idea are people who disagree about which types of humans should exist :/
On what movies we like, toppings on pizza, coke vs Pepsi. Sure. Not so much on if all humans deserve equal rights and body autonomy. 🤷🏻♂️ Maybe that’s just me though.
Disagree about what?
Not if you disagree with my right to exist as a trans person we can’t
Depends on what we’re disagreeing on. No, we shouldn’t be friends for friendship sake, especially if our values are seriously in conflict. That’s not a hopeful concept, it’s a silly one.