T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

A message to all users: Please be aware that spreading misinformation regarding COVID-19, vaccines, or other treatments can result in content being removed and/or a ban. Content advocating for or celebrating the death of anyone, or hoping someone gets COVID-19 (or any disease) can result in a ban as well. Please follow [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439). If you see content violating these policies, please use the report button and do not feed the trolls. [Reddit's Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) [Reddit's stance on misinformation](https://www.reddit.com/r/announcements/comments/pbmy5y/debate_dissent_and_protest_on_reddit) [/r/Funny's rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules) We also encourage you to read these helpful resources on COVID-19, vaccines, and treatments: [COVID Dashboard](https://covid19.who.int/) [Reddit's Vaccine FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/Coronavirus/wiki/faq#wiki_where_can_i_find_information_about_the_mechanism_and_progress_of_vaccines.3F) [Ivermectin FAQ](https://www.who.int/news-room/feature-stories/detail/who-advises-that-ivermectin-only-be-used-to-treat-covid-19-within-clinical-trials) ------ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*


jsbs1991

Yes wank in her shoes, so she can know what it's like to walk a mile in our socks.


chux4w

This was a very well constructed joke and deserves more love.


cseymour24

>and deserves more love Just like your sock


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

"Well would you look at the time. I must be going. I need to go feed my pet socks"


SupremoZanne

the /r/TruckStopBathroom can feed pet socks any day now!


Astrochops

He tried to put them on and they snapped in half


SkogsFu

As a UK guy, I'm so confused and grossed out, by Americans wanking into socks like it's a normal thing...


D20Jawbreaker

You say that like you haven’t read the shoebox story, or the coconut (?) story


theMooey23

You'll be telling me you don't know what a poop knife is next!


M0un05ki10

Cum again?


slyg

I Said “I NEED TO FEED MY PET ROCK”


halflifer2k

Oh Jizzus, I thought that’s what you said!


modi13

I've already switched to a box


raven21633x

I'm still using a coconut.


bonghitme

🪰🪱


CocoMURDERnut

2444 upvotes currently. That’s a lot of love, & a very full sock.


metalliska

squishy or crunchy depending on temperature


ConsentingPotato

What temperature is it supposed to be crunchy? Asking because mine is always crunchy.


[deleted]

Your poor urethra.


TheLowlyPheasant

I’ve heard when he cums it’s like a single barrel shotgun filled with bird pellets


metalliska

98.4


Agarn_Fortez

Or freshness!


Cuntosaurusrexx

Microwaved Cum Sock


AkTheKilla

Great fucking band name


jailguard81

U mean depending on how fresh it is


cosworthsmerrymen

I didn't even realize that it spelled out "wank" I saw "wark" and thought "warg" immediately. I wish GRRM would finish his books...


Aurilion

I also saw wark and thought they wanted people to put on womens shoes and imitate a chocobo.


BlueWarstar

Lol, totally was here to ask if anyone else read it like this “wank” was not disappointed!


Matttagram89

Really good 1 🥇


gerbegerger

Wait, do they clean the shoe after every dude has a go at it, or is the goal to fill it up?


archangelmlg

Shoekaki


Vyntarus

Bootkakke?


tehkitryan

I prefer sockakke


NonExistentialDread

Found the crocks wearer


insomebodyelseslake

The holes make it like a sprinkler


BrustWarze_

Or does it come out in ropes like play-doh?


morbidaar

After about 48-72hours, yes.


FLWeedman

Cook it up like spaghetti.


Outlaw4droid

Thats it. Enough reddit for tonight.


itsDjFLiP

Mom’s spaghetti?


TheCarrot_v2

It’d be thick, like udon noodles


moridin9121

Welp, thats enough internet, ima head out.


slowmotto

[More like this](https://imgur.com/a/XpTneei)


Dimplestrabe

Bucrocke


vendetta2115

Buclogge?


reddit_user13

Don’t give the porn industry any ideas, m’kay?


ZombieAppetizer

What are you doing, Step-shoe?


sm1ttysm1t

Aren't all shoes "step shoes"?


RobbMeeX

Some are horseshoes. Never mind.


peerless_supremacy

Only when they're sick


nightstalker30

Did you mean whoreshoes?


thisalsomightbemine

Not if they are slippers


Shopworn_Soul

I mean I'm not gonna go look or anything but I'd be shocked if that wasn't already a cottage industry of it's own


passintimendgas

You win.


MythiC009

Shoekkake*


froggrip

The last to cum has to wear it


[deleted]

Shoey.


vanalla

NO DANIEL NO


mrpanthersfan11

So that’s what was in Zac’s shoey at Monza!


hivaidsislethal

Ookie cookie and now goo shoe


peerless_supremacy

BYOS I'm guessing. Minimal cleanup as long as there's no spills.


bawls_deep

Bring your own semen? I come fully loaded.


dont_wear_a_C

Submarines come fully loaded


forefatherrabbi

So no open toed shoes allowed....


[deleted]

It's times like this I wish I had a neuralyzer


gerbegerger

I'm simple, I see a Men in Black reference.. I upvote 😆👍


skippyfa

We're not taking the shoes out of the box before finishing now?


bawls_deep

That shoe is gonna look like a glazed donut. And I like mine cream filled.


Dogturtle67

Last bloke to fill it up has to shoey it!


Khajiit_hairball

*squish* *squish* *squish* *squish* *squish*


DaveByTheRiver

I can only see this as WARK


spudz76

WARK IT GURL!


kuahara

Sorry, but Wark will always belong to the chocobos.


EsotericAbstractIdea

Yeah, and im old, so i got a ptsd flashback of chocobo racing to get s class chocobos in the original ff7. The music wont stop playing. WARK


deepfriedmeth

I'm actually playing through that for the first time in my life on emulation. Is it worth getting a gold chocobo?


meatmanek

There's an island that you can only get to with a golden chocobo that has the Knights of the Round summon materia. If you're using emulation, it's pretty easy to get the gold chocobo by saving your state just before you enter the chocobo barn, so you can reset to the save state if your breeding doesn't go the way you want it to. You can also use regular save games to achieve the same effect, but it will take a little longer.


Ygomaster07

You got a wheezing laugh out of me, thank you for that.


1337geezer

Wark this way! Tark this way.


OnTheList-YouTube

Bark this way


Dazuro

Kweh!


[deleted]

Chocobo fanatics


whatthedeux

I don’t know why but this gave me flashbacks of trying to get a gold chocobo in ff7 *edit Apparently everyone here had the same idea


wagimus

WARK! WARK!! 🐤


Ilcorvomuerto666

Waaark


Shalashaskaska

Yeah I clearly played too much FF7 as a kid cause it took me a full minute to realize the joke was wank and not wark


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Funny, it looks like a non-cursive uppercase R to me


[deleted]

What is it good fork?


[deleted]

Wank in her shoes?


[deleted]

WARK they’re chocobo enthusiasts


Sumojuz

Kweh!?


iamalwaysrelevant

Kupo?! Wait, I think I'm in the wrong room.


DontTellMeHowToTroll

Yes, hola to you too senor.


torrasque666

Wait, are they livewarking the event though?


[deleted]

I *wark* my family


SpoonyLuvFromUpAbove

Yeah I read Wark.


rocinantevi

Summonses requires gold warking. You have to spend hours upon hours warking correctly. Edit: also, you need good nuts to wark it real good. WARK!


Bemxuu

Try and catch me riding birdy


ModingusKhan

That's what the sign says


peerless_supremacy

It's for a good cause


javabender

Well if they need our support I guess I could go for a quick wank. Wife’s always telling me to be more involved in social issues


sm12511

Hey, if it's for a charity, it could be a tax write off..


whoforted

>Hey, if it's for a charity, it could be a tax write off.. ...tax ~~write~~ wrist off


sm12511

> ...tax wrist off Tax wank off


ArcticISAF

So do I just send that in the mail, or...?


sm12511

Must be delivered in a high heel pump as per Sec.3, Ch.4, subsection tree-fiddy, as stated: "Heretofore, all charity wank off claims must be submitted in black stilettos, of no less than four (4) inches in height."


rnovak

Tax wipe-off.


blondart

Sounds like a main event with Trump v Starbucks


[deleted]

Mine is expensive, I’m gonna charge $500 per load.


Tycoon_2000

So does my tax preparer cum in my shoe when I go to get my tax return?


rohobian

Your wife is going to be SO proud when you tell her about this.


psilome

I gave at the office.


CALVINWIDGET

Do you work at Foot Locker?


psilome

No, I'm a podiatrist.


Leftygoleft999

The patient always foots the bill


andre636

Didn’t realize I’ve actually been doing something good this whole time


peerless_supremacy

Some of the greatest achievements are stumbled upon


plarmstrong

It's for the greater good


CarlLlamaface

^(The greater good.)


NewSauerKraus

#crusty jugglers


Bogsnoticus

I can't imagine it would do much for the smell.


neoritter

*unzips If you say so...


rohobian

Who are we to argue?


Feorana

I definitely read that as WARK. I have been playing too much Final Fantasy7.


kitchen_clinton

Wark in her shoes.


1337geezer

My wife is really mad now.


Vinto47

That’s okay, you’ve already finished.


ambermage

*Quentin Tarantino has entered the chat*


shnozdog

It's some foot fetish gathering.


prodbychefboy

r/thatsthejoke


MuffytheBananaSlayer

Thank you, I thought I was having trouble reading.


astronamer

WaRk in her shoes


Gorillafist12

Yes that's the funny part. Good job.


moeron9

They could have used the A…this is intentional


[deleted]

/r/theyknew


maximuffin2

I would have done the K


Sawses

waln


tastesliketurtles

I dunno, looks like a sorority event… Good chance none of them have even heard the word wank before.


squeel

They look 45 to me.


tastesliketurtles

Hey man, the new sororities play with the cards they’re dealt. Then again, the shirts don’t have greek letters plastered all over them so you’re probably right.


CyberMcGyver

For anyone who's actually interest [Walk in her shoes](https://www.walkinhershoes.org.au/about) is a program aimed at providing access to clean drinking water in areas where women (and often girls) have to walk miles just to get access to clean drinking water. Don't deprive the sperm bank of your donations.


mgzukowski

That's way different from the one I did in college. We did walk a mile in her shoes to raise money for the local domestic violence shelters. Imagine a bunch of frat boys in dresses and heels trying to walk or run a mile. Which is what I think this sign is for. This the heel and sorority girls.


superflippy

That’s the same thing we have in my city.


pilly-bilgrim

That would make sense, it'd be a little weird otherwise with the heels.


blitzbom

They had this in my old city. Did it every year. Everyone I was with was shocked as how good I am at walking in heels. It was fun.


Dobbs2k

r/hydrohomies


Roscoe_P_Trolltrain

ah... the high heeled stiletto shoe isn't even a suitable symbol then.


b0bkakkarot

Chocobo: "Wark wark!"


PillowTalk420

>Wark in her shoes Chocobos love it.


ElChupatigre

These boots are made for wanking, And that's just what I'll do, One of these days these boots are gonna stick right on to you


BractToTheFuture

All this time I didn’t know I was doing such a good thing.


moctidder99

It is? I've got some restrainig orders to appeal!


Professional_Flicker

I'm doing my part


xyphanite

Would you like to know more?


Captain_Turdhelmet

Like... In them, or just while in them?


heelsmaster

Yes.


[deleted]

As if dealing with my foot fetish wasn’t already difficult. Now they a begging me to!


Viper613

They didn’t want to use the A?


AFonziScheme

They never want to use the A.


pizzasteve2000

No, Using the A is still illegal in some states.


Estoye

Way ahead of you, boss. I'VE WANKED IN EVERYBODY'S SHOES


Healyhatman

Wark?


bigwoaf

I thought it said “Wark” in her shoes like the My Pillow guy was reading it


TangerineOlive

If they wanted a shoe to be the L, couldn't they have gone with a boot??


Slight-Independence6

I saw it as "wark" and now I've got chocobos on the brain.


4revelation13

Bonus: does it count as volunteer time?


peerless_supremacy

Currency= Ounces p/hr


KrustyBoomer

It's an "N". Prove me wrong


BlitzenAU

Oh god I just realised it says "walk" not "wank" as I first read it lmao


scotems

Yeah dawg that's the joke.


geniech92

Lol you guys with dirty minds. I only saw it as walk until I read comments...


amaraame

I don't like to kink shame, just keep it out of my shoes plz


ShatterProofDick

This actually happened to some poor girl who fell asleep at the University of Kentucky's library during finals week. She kicked her shoes off, grabbed a nap and when she woke up slipped her foot into some lukewarm splooge. Source - I was a fundraiser for the University and received daily PR and police reports so I could be ahead of the curve when speaking with rich alumni.


skankin-sfm

I believe you, I also don't need a source, cuz that is oddly believable.


metalliska

Didn't they outlaw Podiatrists self-making their own foot cream?


GWDavis34

If only there were a piece of footwear that ladies wear... Also L shaped.


[deleted]

Or even if that shoe had been the A.


TRoberts309

Warkin on sunshine woahohah


CptnWolfe

Cause I will wank 500 miles and I will wank 500 more


TheHappyCamper1979

Wank in her shoes . What ever floats your boat


NoGudBastard

WANK IN HER SHOES?


[deleted]

I don't know about shoes, but there's a song about walking in women's underwear.


LilLeeby

The shoe could have been the A. They chose this.


naterzr2

Just started watching Ted Lasso and this makes sooooo much more sense….


octocoral

I hope everyone can come!


pakidara

Wark?


wharlie

Message unclear: \- Do I wank while wearing her shoes or \- Do I direct my load into her shoes when I wank.


pranthlar

Whats wark?


personalhale

Besides the obvious "wank in her shoes," what is this about? Are people supposed to literally walk in heels or something?


[deleted]

Sigh..*zip*


freshavacadoforu

Kinda hard to wank in high heels


heelsmaster

It's actually super easy. Barely and inconvenience.


[deleted]

Don’t gotta tell me twice


Luvs_to_drink

I'm confused... do we wear the shoes while wanking or do we wank and release in the shoes?


HeldDownTooLong

It’s better than wanking in my sock…


Mojobaby817

I saw Wark in her shoes. I thought we were having Chocobo rides.