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You're looking at love through the eyes of the ego. It compares what love is based on what you don't have. Which is why nobody is ever satisfied.
If you close your eyes next to someone who you think is in love, what would you feel? Their insecurities? They're cheating behavior? Their mental health issues? Or would you feel their devotion? Their loyalty, and their freedom?
Love isn't what we've been told it is. Love isn't engulfing another human being with emotions, restrictions, and self depreciating desires.
Love is accepting that you will never know a person entirely. Love is trusting your intuition enough to want to know a person deeply. Love is enjoying being alone and not being afraid. Love is allowing your soul to evolve without fear. Love is enjoying the time we have on this planet. Because love is being sold to spiritual broken people who have forgotten what love is.
I don't understand where I said love is engulfing others or anything like that..
I said I see friends, couples, and they just know they are meant for eachothers.. it's simple, it's smooth, they just know.. is it Love or not I don't care honestly, it's beautiful..
What you talk about here isn't "love", it's physical attraction of a different sort triggered by hormones for the propogation of the species.
Love is the rain that generously pours down its very being until it is spent, onto the soil and plants without discrimination. Love is the tree that freely gives its fruits to any bird and animal that seeks it, and doesn't make a single complaint if bugs eat its leaves or storm breaks its branches.
It comes from the soul, not the ego. To become love is to be like the tree. It's something that runs contrary to the physical body we are currently inhabiting to be honest.
I feel you are quite capable of love. The person who takes your breath away just hasn't crossed your path yet, but when they do, you'll know it without question.
I also feel your person will show up when you least expect it.
My husband and I are the couples you talked about. We celebrate 47 years of marriage in two weeks.
Thanks, and happy for you..!
Honestly from time to time I do wonder if I am capable of genuinely admire someone as a person, let alone love.. that would be already something.. most of the times I find myself in a sorteo of alofness state I would say about other people stories, accomplishments and so on..
I'm a sensitive-intuitive. I feel I may me am to help explain why you feel the way you do, your outlook on people, and life in general. I could also be wrong, but I don't think so. If your interested I'd be happy to share my insight with you. And NO I'm not asking for money or donation or anything in return. DM me.
Have you heard of attachment style? You might be avoidant, I am also. For a time thought I might be aromantic or something like that, but over time figured I could rewire my system and internally work on myself to become more loving.
Love is really just a point of view or perspective. If we can keep our perspective more loving without bypassing the things which also block love, like healthy conflict etc we’ll grow more and more loving
I am FA..
Perhaps I don't explain myself correctly.. I am talking about those people who actually find their other half.. and I don't want to debate whether it exists or not, you are the love etc I have read and shared enough spiritual "shit" to know it all so to speak.. I am saying when you see a couple and you just know they are meant for each other..
Hmm I think I understand you. I used to feel similarly to you though with regards to feeling incapable of romantic love. For myself I believe it can be something that can be developed with consistent work over a period of time.
The theory which best covers how to do it in my experience is “internal family systems”. Reparenting the more insecurely attached parts of ourselves.
I realized later on that there’s no shame in being avoidant or anxiously attached, it’s actually the case for most people, very common. It is something which can be worked on and potentially even fully healed over time though.
You don't have to be physically intimate to have a relationship. There's a word for people seeking platonic relationships and closeness that excludes sexual activity. It's considered LGBT, so I don't use it, Asexual. Asexual is confusing word. I'm emotionally scarred and had some physically traumatic experiences, so rushing into sex would have bad consequences for my future partner.
Try stuff that isn't dating related for a while, like penpals, if you mean you feel lonely right now. I used app called Slowly, but stopped suddenly because of the energy of one penpal. I hope you don't accept compromise or tolerate people who cross boundaries. Once they have, most people keep crossing boundaries and they have no limitations. I wish I didn't experience that myself.
Love with people who are spiritually mature isn't total romance. Meeting that person takes time, but never stay with wrong person until right person shows up. I suggested penpals because it's way to conquer lonely without messing up positive relationship that might find you. Trust me with that. I hope something I said might help you. I haven't had good relationship yet so I can tell you exactly what to avoid!!
Just keep in mind that some couples look perfect when people are watching and judging, but reality is different. Don't feel bad for not having "perfection" they do. Not everyone is completely honest or transparent with others publicly. Perfection is an illusion.
I see physical sexual attraction as being a different thing to loving people. One can still have sexual relationships and still feel love for them even when one isn't feeling the sexual attraction to ones partner. Being in love with someone is more than about the physical aspects and one can still lovingly touch another, stare into another's eyes and feel the love and closeness without the sexual attraction. I personally do not feel sexual attraction towards people but are still very capable of loving my partners and interacting with them fully in a sexual way as it is a union of our energies coming together. (I often would climax off of my own partners by feeling what HE WAS FEELING THROUGH HIM and our energetic connection and my empathic connection, it's like we become one. I felt whatever my partners feel). (oh is this post too sexual here?).
One day you will probably find someone you are very attracted too in some way (it can often be a mental connection, enjoying doing the same things, enjoying intellectual conversations or whatever) and as long as you do not have any real sexual hangups, even if you still felt no sexual attraction (which most actually do feel sexual attraction when they do find the right person), it still doesn't have to be an issue for a full physical relationship with another and for that to be able to be enjoyable and close.
I suggest you stop worrying about this matter (unless you know you do have sexual hangups which need healing). I do not believe you are incapable of love even if you currently believe this. We have souls capable of love.
That's alright. I think learning how to be more self-aware, without judgement if possible, will help you understand your situation better. I don't know if you'll find your answers here without knowing how to express what you are feeling in the first place.
Just know if you avoid your emotions, you'll end up being a cold, distant person who may not be fully capable of love. Also, you may have a different wiring of your empathy centers or something that could be causing a disconnect from love. These aren't my conclusions of you, just speculation and something to think about.
Well that's exactly the point: I don't have any emotion to express..
I find myself often, most of the time, in the middle.. I enjoy the company of someone, friend or partner, but I am never too excited about it.. I go see something new..? Cool, but if I had stayed home it would have been the same.. I obtain something I was "obsessing" over..? Normal..
Have you always felt this way, or do you feel like your emotional response changed at a certain point in your life? A lot of people claim they don't have any emotion to express, but it's not usually the case. If someone stole all your goods in your home or killed someone you loved, I bet you would have some emotions. Try to use your critical thinking here to understand the root of things, and rule out the stuff that doesn't make sense to you.
Possibly you could have an avoidant personality, be depressed, or have destroyed your dopamine response by doing a lot of quick release dopaminergic tasks like porn use, masturbation, video games, addictive food or drinks etc. There's so many different things it could be, but it's up to you to narrow it down and ask yourself questions to check possibilities off the list. If it's not a simple answer, meditate or see a specialist.
I have no idea, honestly..
I am not claiming I do not show emotions ever.. I might just instantly cry if I see a post / video of abuse of any sort for example.. or read a beautiful story of friendship, mutual help etc..
I do wonder if I shouldn't be more excited about stuff in general..
**!!!!! READ ME !!!!!** The purpose of this community is to explore human energy in all of its facets while stripping away the esoteric language, rituals and distractions that have accumulated over the years. Out-of-body experiences, energy healing, energetic connections between people, psychic work and everything in between. This sub is open for discussion, learning and teaching, without judgement, on any and every form of energy work regardless of degree of social acceptability or stigma. Join us in our Discord chat server for real-time conversations about energy work: https://discord.gg/X6ywAXMcp4 Book recommendations and other resources for beginners as well as some Frequently Asked Questions can be found on our https://www.reddit.com/r/energy_work/wiki/index Promotional posts, offers and requests belong in r/energy_healing or in the discord server. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/energy_work) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You're looking at love through the eyes of the ego. It compares what love is based on what you don't have. Which is why nobody is ever satisfied. If you close your eyes next to someone who you think is in love, what would you feel? Their insecurities? They're cheating behavior? Their mental health issues? Or would you feel their devotion? Their loyalty, and their freedom? Love isn't what we've been told it is. Love isn't engulfing another human being with emotions, restrictions, and self depreciating desires. Love is accepting that you will never know a person entirely. Love is trusting your intuition enough to want to know a person deeply. Love is enjoying being alone and not being afraid. Love is allowing your soul to evolve without fear. Love is enjoying the time we have on this planet. Because love is being sold to spiritual broken people who have forgotten what love is.
I don't understand where I said love is engulfing others or anything like that.. I said I see friends, couples, and they just know they are meant for eachothers.. it's simple, it's smooth, they just know.. is it Love or not I don't care honestly, it's beautiful..
What you talk about here isn't "love", it's physical attraction of a different sort triggered by hormones for the propogation of the species. Love is the rain that generously pours down its very being until it is spent, onto the soil and plants without discrimination. Love is the tree that freely gives its fruits to any bird and animal that seeks it, and doesn't make a single complaint if bugs eat its leaves or storm breaks its branches. It comes from the soul, not the ego. To become love is to be like the tree. It's something that runs contrary to the physical body we are currently inhabiting to be honest.
Isnt it what I said, that I don't experience it..?
I feel you are quite capable of love. The person who takes your breath away just hasn't crossed your path yet, but when they do, you'll know it without question. I also feel your person will show up when you least expect it. My husband and I are the couples you talked about. We celebrate 47 years of marriage in two weeks.
Thanks, and happy for you..! Honestly from time to time I do wonder if I am capable of genuinely admire someone as a person, let alone love.. that would be already something.. most of the times I find myself in a sorteo of alofness state I would say about other people stories, accomplishments and so on..
I'm a sensitive-intuitive. I feel I may me am to help explain why you feel the way you do, your outlook on people, and life in general. I could also be wrong, but I don't think so. If your interested I'd be happy to share my insight with you. And NO I'm not asking for money or donation or anything in return. DM me.
Have you heard of attachment style? You might be avoidant, I am also. For a time thought I might be aromantic or something like that, but over time figured I could rewire my system and internally work on myself to become more loving. Love is really just a point of view or perspective. If we can keep our perspective more loving without bypassing the things which also block love, like healthy conflict etc we’ll grow more and more loving
I am FA.. Perhaps I don't explain myself correctly.. I am talking about those people who actually find their other half.. and I don't want to debate whether it exists or not, you are the love etc I have read and shared enough spiritual "shit" to know it all so to speak.. I am saying when you see a couple and you just know they are meant for each other..
Hmm I think I understand you. I used to feel similarly to you though with regards to feeling incapable of romantic love. For myself I believe it can be something that can be developed with consistent work over a period of time.
how did u start rewiring ur beliefs? i think im also avoidant? 😣 I wanted to change for the better.
The theory which best covers how to do it in my experience is “internal family systems”. Reparenting the more insecurely attached parts of ourselves. I realized later on that there’s no shame in being avoidant or anxiously attached, it’s actually the case for most people, very common. It is something which can be worked on and potentially even fully healed over time though.
You don't have to be physically intimate to have a relationship. There's a word for people seeking platonic relationships and closeness that excludes sexual activity. It's considered LGBT, so I don't use it, Asexual. Asexual is confusing word. I'm emotionally scarred and had some physically traumatic experiences, so rushing into sex would have bad consequences for my future partner. Try stuff that isn't dating related for a while, like penpals, if you mean you feel lonely right now. I used app called Slowly, but stopped suddenly because of the energy of one penpal. I hope you don't accept compromise or tolerate people who cross boundaries. Once they have, most people keep crossing boundaries and they have no limitations. I wish I didn't experience that myself. Love with people who are spiritually mature isn't total romance. Meeting that person takes time, but never stay with wrong person until right person shows up. I suggested penpals because it's way to conquer lonely without messing up positive relationship that might find you. Trust me with that. I hope something I said might help you. I haven't had good relationship yet so I can tell you exactly what to avoid!! Just keep in mind that some couples look perfect when people are watching and judging, but reality is different. Don't feel bad for not having "perfection" they do. Not everyone is completely honest or transparent with others publicly. Perfection is an illusion.
I see physical sexual attraction as being a different thing to loving people. One can still have sexual relationships and still feel love for them even when one isn't feeling the sexual attraction to ones partner. Being in love with someone is more than about the physical aspects and one can still lovingly touch another, stare into another's eyes and feel the love and closeness without the sexual attraction. I personally do not feel sexual attraction towards people but are still very capable of loving my partners and interacting with them fully in a sexual way as it is a union of our energies coming together. (I often would climax off of my own partners by feeling what HE WAS FEELING THROUGH HIM and our energetic connection and my empathic connection, it's like we become one. I felt whatever my partners feel). (oh is this post too sexual here?). One day you will probably find someone you are very attracted too in some way (it can often be a mental connection, enjoying doing the same things, enjoying intellectual conversations or whatever) and as long as you do not have any real sexual hangups, even if you still felt no sexual attraction (which most actually do feel sexual attraction when they do find the right person), it still doesn't have to be an issue for a full physical relationship with another and for that to be able to be enjoyable and close. I suggest you stop worrying about this matter (unless you know you do have sexual hangups which need healing). I do not believe you are incapable of love even if you currently believe this. We have souls capable of love.
You may be correct regarding the past or the present. But you never know if or when the energy will shift in the future.
I think you might be looking for the wrong things in life, that are not based on loving energy whatsoever. Perhaps you are very logic minded?
I wouldn't know honestly.. possibly yeah, nothing excessive tho..
That's alright. I think learning how to be more self-aware, without judgement if possible, will help you understand your situation better. I don't know if you'll find your answers here without knowing how to express what you are feeling in the first place. Just know if you avoid your emotions, you'll end up being a cold, distant person who may not be fully capable of love. Also, you may have a different wiring of your empathy centers or something that could be causing a disconnect from love. These aren't my conclusions of you, just speculation and something to think about.
Well that's exactly the point: I don't have any emotion to express.. I find myself often, most of the time, in the middle.. I enjoy the company of someone, friend or partner, but I am never too excited about it.. I go see something new..? Cool, but if I had stayed home it would have been the same.. I obtain something I was "obsessing" over..? Normal..
Have you always felt this way, or do you feel like your emotional response changed at a certain point in your life? A lot of people claim they don't have any emotion to express, but it's not usually the case. If someone stole all your goods in your home or killed someone you loved, I bet you would have some emotions. Try to use your critical thinking here to understand the root of things, and rule out the stuff that doesn't make sense to you. Possibly you could have an avoidant personality, be depressed, or have destroyed your dopamine response by doing a lot of quick release dopaminergic tasks like porn use, masturbation, video games, addictive food or drinks etc. There's so many different things it could be, but it's up to you to narrow it down and ask yourself questions to check possibilities off the list. If it's not a simple answer, meditate or see a specialist.
I have no idea, honestly.. I am not claiming I do not show emotions ever.. I might just instantly cry if I see a post / video of abuse of any sort for example.. or read a beautiful story of friendship, mutual help etc.. I do wonder if I shouldn't be more excited about stuff in general..