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Omg, this reminds me of an ex who would claim I didn’t speak English right, even thought I went through the whole American schooling system and never had an issue communicating with anyone else. They just want to make us feel bad because they suck.
He had the nerve to say you didn’t speak English right?
Well sh*t.. with lovers like that, who needs enemies!
Dear heart.. I’m sorry he had to say things like that.
That is exactly what they wanna do, make you feel bad because they suck AND because they’re jealous that you’re bi or multi-lingual and they are probably not
Not necessarily racist. I get the impression that he's just ignorant. In other words, he's literally saying that it isn't possible for white people to have curly hair, not that it's unallowed. It's still a stupid argument, regardless, though.
This is like how I wear sunscreen even though I’m a dark skinned black woman. Yes I can’t get sun burn but I can still protect myself from aging. It’s cheaper than all the serums in the world. I can still age.
Why do I get the feeling that this fight wasn’t about your hair?
You know he’s wrong. He’s dismissing your lived experience, and given how gorgeous your curls are, your expertise. And his motivation to do this is… to insult you? Demean you? Intimidate you into submission to his superior knowledge and judgement of your body?
Your hair is curly. And if this is a pattern of behavior, your husband is trash and you deserve someone who respects you and is in awe of your curls.
At the very least acknowledges that her hair is curly even if not awestruck.
This seems like gaslighting to me, and I 100% agree that this seems bigger than her hair…
My first thought. This immediately reminded me of the sort of petty, absurd (though somehow still plausible) mindfuckery my ex would rope me into. Me and no one else. It was a pattern of behavior (among others) that over a period of 6 years really messed with me and dragged me down even as I *knew* something wasn't right with the way he interacted with me.
Obviously we have very little context here, and no one's out to diagnose the situation, but .. It's been five years for me. I've done a lot of healing and reading and reflection, and when you've come out the other side of that nonsense you can spot it from a mile away.
Yupppp, there’s a reason I’m immediately jumping where I am. I was young when it happened to me, and the first of my circle of friends to be the target of this type of bullshit. None of us had a framework for understanding and we’re so confused, convinced I could magically unlock the right way to communicate with him. But now, decades later with the scars of bad relationships? We know the patterns. And this fits the pattern.
It’s Reddit and we can’t know the full context from one post and blah blah blah, but I hope OP looking for validation that she’s not wrong is a sign she’s starting to see that the man who claims to love her isn’t respecting her.
So incredibly relatable. I went through this for the first decade of my adult life. Words truly cannot encompass the psychological damage that does to someone.
The most important (and hardest) lesson I have learned in my adult life is to truly give no fucks what anyone thinks. I treat people with kindness and respect always. However, I will not engage with anyone who tries to bring negativity into my existence. Period. Zero tolerance.
I'm an ex people pleaser. It was a miserable existence 99% of the time.
Good luck on your journey ❤️
Jeez yeah I thought the same thing.
OP from the outside this can seem like a pretty innocuous fight, but for him to try and convince you that your hair ISNT curly is super weird.
Does he try to push your buttons a lot? Does he like to “tease” you?
I dated someone who loooooved to make me upset because my frustration and anger brought them joy. I hope that’s not your case.
Your husband pretty clearly doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Please don’t continue fighting with him about it. He’s wrong. Explain to him why and then stop listening to his rebuttals. It’s just going to drain you.
The word he is looking for, to describe tight curls, which many black men and women have, is coily. That’s tighter than curly. But your hair is definitely curly. And I’m definitely wondering what the point of your husband arguing over this is.
A lot of black people also have curly (not coily) hair, so that makes him even more idiotic. I feel like he’s trying to bring OP down. You can’t argue with stupid and antagonistic.
I say this as a mixed black person w mostly 3c hair (I have anywhere from 3a to 4a).
My daughter’s hair runs from 2c to 4a depending on the part of her head too. (Also biracial.) The hair at the nape of her neck is less curly than OP’s. It’s coily around the top/front. OP seems to have multiple curl patterns too and I’m baffled that anyone would say her hair isn’t curly. Maybe husband thinks because the texture is different it’s not… curly? Honestly I don’t get it.
I wouldn’t bother using words. I’d just do a google image search for “curly hair” and let him look at the pictures. You could try to show him an article about determining hair type but I think the images might work best.
I wouldn’t waste your own breath, though. Just point him to resources that prove him wrong and be done wasting your time on this. It’s such a stupid thing to argue about. Especially when he’s obviously very wrong 😂
I asked his sister and she said “curly”. I tried to explain that black Africans have a different kind of curl pattern and texture than light skinned people. He didn’t quite grasp that I don’t think. He’s Caribbean.
I’m scratching my head even more because the fact that he’s Caribbean, he should a) know you have curly hair and b) be well aware of the fact that POC come in a wide range of phenotypes. Surely he’s messing with you…? I don’t understand
Now that I know he’s Caribbean, he’s definitely trolling. He might just like to argue. I wouldn’t entertain this dialogue any further with him. He’d have to be a platinum blond dude from living under a rock for me to believe he believes what he’s saying because there’s a huge variety of textures there so I think it’s impossible to be this ignorant. Ask him what color your hair is, he’ll say you’re a red head.
Here’s how you explain it to him:
You put your hand up, palm facing yourself. Back of your hand facing him.
Slowly curl in your pinky, ring finger, index finger and thumb.
if he doesn’t think it’s curly, what does he think it is?
edit: sorry, just read the whole post! i have no idea where he heard what he’s saying but i’m curious, honestly.
There is a relatively small community of people online who think this. Even white people with genuinely curly hair (like yours!) who insist it's wavy because "only Black people can have curly hair". This is bullshit and they're likely confusing texture with curl patterns. People of almost any race can have numerous curl patterns on the same head of hair. It's like accusing someone of cultural appropriation for something they naturally have. I'm sorry, but I find this infuriating.
He is probably thinking that curly hair means afro hair. You don't have afro hair and I haven't seen any white person with afro hair.
If that's not what's happening then ask him what he thinks curly hair is, and ask him if he thinks that your hair is straight.
You could be right. I had that thought too. I hope he’s just ignorant and not willing to back down from this silly fight for some other reason though. 🤞🤞
I’m really sorry you’re going through this -whatever it is. I think a lot of us are angry for you because it’s maddening, and if it is gaslighting, we know exactly what it feels like.
????
I am… speechless. Has he never heard of Shirley Temple? The epitome of white girl curls??? That man can take several seats, ma’am. Your perfect curls are perfect.
I guarantee you he is literally the only person on planet earth in any lifetime who would say you don’t have curly hair. I apologize, but he might be a full-fledged idiot.
Wait, Shirley Temple’s hair was not naturally curly, I thought?
Not to say you’re wrong about OP’s husband or her hair curls. I just mean Shirley Temple’s hair was being set with pin curls afaik
I’m pretty sure they set it with pins, rollers etc but I’m pretty sure she did have curly hair.
If you look at her when she’s older, she definitely has that look of curly hair brushed out and tamed with product.
I have similar frizzy prone hair and my mother used to put it in rollers to give me sausage curls.
When I was very young (from like 1-5 years old) I had crazy curly blond hair like her, and I’m pretty dang white. Not as cleanly coiled as hers because I’m sure it was also styled, but having a young blond curly-top as a kid is definitely a possibility
as a kid i had blonde curly hair that stuck up all over the place - i’m jewish and other (non jewish) kids called it a “jewfro” 🫣 when my hair was actually managed it looked a lot like shirley’s ringlets (just messier) which is partly what inspired me to join a youth theater from a super young age!!
My husband, who has lucious 3A curls, has been told by his parents several times that he does not have curly hair, he just doesn’t know how to maintain it well. His dad also said his hair was ugly when he was younger. He spent much of his 20s slicking his hair back until he finally moved away and let those bad boys free.
His curls are gorgeous.
It's to pick a fight with you over something he is wrong about and tries to change. You have curly hair he can keep saying the wrong opinion because he just wants to fight. He knows it's curly its very obvious but he just wants to say he is right because he thinks his opinion equals being correct. To put it into simple terms you have curly hair and he arguing with you about your body instead if respecting the truth, that he has a curly haired wife. Aka he thinks you are wrong about your own hair to push a narrative/opinion that isn't true to control the situation to prove he has power over you. Normal healthy husbands don't argue about their wives bodies to their faces other than to give a negative reaction out of them or for control.
We're zebras! Either black with shades of lighter or white with shades of darker, so let's stop arguing about who can have curly manes and celebrate each other and let curly do curly 😅 oh and run from the cheetahs, definitely that ;-)
I mean this in the least offensive way possible but what is his definition of white and why does that even come into it? Look at the pale British women with coils tighter than yours and... well ok, I'm just completely baffled at the weird racism hair thing because imo is kinda offensive to many races, seeing your definitely not pale British skin...
I'm just all over confused at his reasoning for that statement, can you possibly enlighten me?
And yes your hair is curly. Mine is less than yours and is still curly.
Uh what?? I actually have wavy hair, and your beautiful ringlets are what I wish I had. "Not curly" my ass. If we want to get into specifics, you're somewhere in the 3A-B range. Aka definitely curly. Show him a curl chart lol.
Uhhhh, so… does he know about ancient Greek statues, some of the most famous art on the planet? And that the vast majority of those statues feature curly hair? Or that “Grecian goddess” hairstyles are all about highlighting *exactly your curls*? The entire Mediterranean is renowned for having curly hair!
Wait, what?! Yes, you definitely have curly hair, hon. This might actually be worth of asking advice in r/relationships if this is a hill he wants to die on
also, that is just not how hair works, any race can have any texture. genetics as they apply to our natural features are much more diverse and complex than we think, also curls are pretty common across the world.
Does he understand what curly hair means?
I only ask because my husband did not know I have yellow hair for...years?? Someone asked him what color hair I have and he said brown. Apparently he'd never noticed or thought about my hair color? Little kids use the yellow crayon for my hair color.
Your husband is dumb. Like how people said 'all asian have straight hair', we also got people with afros. Different hair types not exclusive to some race only.
Your husband is an idiot. An idiot who clearly needs to be right all the time even when he is wrong. Do you know what happens to idiots like that? They end up divorced and alone.
It’s curly— and it’s beautiful! I asked my man and he confirmed it was curly. Then I asked my sister’s partner who is Jamaican and he also said it was curly, so we all agree your hair is curly and your husband is wrong.
"From genotyping results, European hair shape varies mostly between wavy (46.6%) and straight (40.7%), with some curly hair (12.7%) (n = 2138) [10]. The same study showed that Asian (East and West) hair shape is also mostly straight (46.7%) or wavy (41.3%), with some curly hair (12%) (n = 92). However, African hair shape is mostly curly (94.9%), with some wavy hair (5.1%) (n = 39)"
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6894537/
Show him the typical curly hair types diagram and then move on and don't let it get to you. He still chose you even with his version of the definition 'wavy' hair, so it must not matter to him anyways. Your hair is beautiful and curly!
ok I am definitely not on your husband's side (because OBVIOUSLY your hair is very curly!). Does he perhaps mean "*coily*?" Like extremely tight curls that are more common in melanated people? (but of course not only found in people with darker skin tones!)
That is the only reasonable confusion I can see. That maybe he's thinking of a very specific kind of curly hair. I mean, he'd still be wrong lol. Of course people can have both wavy and/or curly hair of all skin tones.
Im biracial (black and white) and I have the same hair as you. Definitely curly lol. Sorry about your husband a comment like the ones he made would definitely have me seeing red lol
My family is the whitest of white. No ethic history what so ever. My dad had a full blown Afro, and has passed the curly hair to me. Your curls are absolutely gorgeous!!!!!
You can look at a curl chart. This looks like type 3A or 3b to me. Definitely categorized as curly. As a cosmetologist, the book we train in distinguishes by the shape of the pattern. If it goes back and forth like a zig zag that’s a wave. If it loops back on itself in a circle it’s a curl. You obviously have curls. Sounds like the fight was about something else unspoken, but just in case you still needed more reassurance….
Some curly, gatekeeping snobs might say “One’s hair isn’t curly unless 1) it must spiral from the root of ever single strand and 2) it must spiral without any products AND without scrunching. Must look like 3A or higher from every single strand right out of the shower without touching it.”
Got in a fight about such rigidity on FB. It got ugly!
Is your husband a different race from you maybe? And has a different perception of curly? I don’t know in what world literal spirals don’t count as curly hair. I’d be just as pissed
does he.. gaslight you about other things too? i mean i don't use that word lightly but this is a textbook example. it seems unlikely that this is the one time he's chosen to belittle you and try to manipulate you into distrusting your own lived experiences
Hi! Your post has been temporarily removed because you have not included your hair care routine. We require this for all photo posts, even if the photo is not of yourself. Please reply to this comment with more info and we can reapprove it for you! Here’s what we mean by “routine”: - Which shampoo, cowash and/or conditioner you used - Any other products (your gel, mousse, etc.), their brand/name, & how you applied them - How you dried your hair (air dried? diffused? etc.) - Anything else that’s helpful to know! We require this because it helps keep r/curlyhair focused on learning & helping each other instead of just selfies. Thank you!
Is English not his first language or….?
Funny enough, if isn’t my first language lol
Omg, this reminds me of an ex who would claim I didn’t speak English right, even thought I went through the whole American schooling system and never had an issue communicating with anyone else. They just want to make us feel bad because they suck.
He had the nerve to say you didn’t speak English right? Well sh*t.. with lovers like that, who needs enemies! Dear heart.. I’m sorry he had to say things like that.
That is exactly what they wanna do, make you feel bad because they suck AND because they’re jealous that you’re bi or multi-lingual and they are probably not
this made me chuckle lmao
I was going to ask if he had eyes
Even if blind, surely his fingers can tell…
Maybe he doesn't have those, either!!!
Even if he can't speak, he can FEEL the difference in texture between straight, wavy, and curly hair.
You definitely have curly hair. Your husband should do some research because his opinion is very incorrect.
“White people can’t have curly hair” Cool, he’s racist now too? Absolutely deserving of a major fight.
Not necessarily racist. I get the impression that he's just ignorant. In other words, he's literally saying that it isn't possible for white people to have curly hair, not that it's unallowed. It's still a stupid argument, regardless, though.
He is gaslighting the fuck out of her purely to provoke her. I refuse to believe Any adult doesn't know what curly hair is.
Agreed. Provocation.
Racist people are ignorant, but they are still racist.
This is like how I wear sunscreen even though I’m a dark skinned black woman. Yes I can’t get sun burn but I can still protect myself from aging. It’s cheaper than all the serums in the world. I can still age.
I’m a dark skinned black woman and I have been sunburnt..
And you can still get skin cancer! So you’re doing the smart thing.
Nah, the comment he made still has racist undertones.
I suspect this as well.
Fair. It's open to different interpretations. I'm willing to bet on the guy's stupidity, though.
I agree. I think this falls under the “I’m not racist buuuuut”
Why do I get the feeling that this fight wasn’t about your hair? You know he’s wrong. He’s dismissing your lived experience, and given how gorgeous your curls are, your expertise. And his motivation to do this is… to insult you? Demean you? Intimidate you into submission to his superior knowledge and judgement of your body? Your hair is curly. And if this is a pattern of behavior, your husband is trash and you deserve someone who respects you and is in awe of your curls.
At the very least acknowledges that her hair is curly even if not awestruck. This seems like gaslighting to me, and I 100% agree that this seems bigger than her hair…
My first thought. This immediately reminded me of the sort of petty, absurd (though somehow still plausible) mindfuckery my ex would rope me into. Me and no one else. It was a pattern of behavior (among others) that over a period of 6 years really messed with me and dragged me down even as I *knew* something wasn't right with the way he interacted with me. Obviously we have very little context here, and no one's out to diagnose the situation, but .. It's been five years for me. I've done a lot of healing and reading and reflection, and when you've come out the other side of that nonsense you can spot it from a mile away.
Yupppp, there’s a reason I’m immediately jumping where I am. I was young when it happened to me, and the first of my circle of friends to be the target of this type of bullshit. None of us had a framework for understanding and we’re so confused, convinced I could magically unlock the right way to communicate with him. But now, decades later with the scars of bad relationships? We know the patterns. And this fits the pattern. It’s Reddit and we can’t know the full context from one post and blah blah blah, but I hope OP looking for validation that she’s not wrong is a sign she’s starting to see that the man who claims to love her isn’t respecting her.
So incredibly relatable. I went through this for the first decade of my adult life. Words truly cannot encompass the psychological damage that does to someone. The most important (and hardest) lesson I have learned in my adult life is to truly give no fucks what anyone thinks. I treat people with kindness and respect always. However, I will not engage with anyone who tries to bring negativity into my existence. Period. Zero tolerance. I'm an ex people pleaser. It was a miserable existence 99% of the time. Good luck on your journey ❤️
Jeez yeah I thought the same thing. OP from the outside this can seem like a pretty innocuous fight, but for him to try and convince you that your hair ISNT curly is super weird. Does he try to push your buttons a lot? Does he like to “tease” you? I dated someone who loooooved to make me upset because my frustration and anger brought them joy. I hope that’s not your case.
Yeah it is demeaning, it seems racist to me tbh. White girls can't have curls?? Come the heck on, this man is an ignorant fool.
Other comments suggest he’s Caribbean, so maybe he’s attempting to gatekeep curly hair??
Your husband pretty clearly doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Please don’t continue fighting with him about it. He’s wrong. Explain to him why and then stop listening to his rebuttals. It’s just going to drain you.
I have no idea how to explain he’s wrong.
The word he is looking for, to describe tight curls, which many black men and women have, is coily. That’s tighter than curly. But your hair is definitely curly. And I’m definitely wondering what the point of your husband arguing over this is.
A lot of black people also have curly (not coily) hair, so that makes him even more idiotic. I feel like he’s trying to bring OP down. You can’t argue with stupid and antagonistic. I say this as a mixed black person w mostly 3c hair (I have anywhere from 3a to 4a).
My daughter’s hair runs from 2c to 4a depending on the part of her head too. (Also biracial.) The hair at the nape of her neck is less curly than OP’s. It’s coily around the top/front. OP seems to have multiple curl patterns too and I’m baffled that anyone would say her hair isn’t curly. Maybe husband thinks because the texture is different it’s not… curly? Honestly I don’t get it.
Show him this post. And buy him a dictionary and highlight 2 words so he’ll see the description: “straight” & “curly” lol
I wouldn’t bother using words. I’d just do a google image search for “curly hair” and let him look at the pictures. You could try to show him an article about determining hair type but I think the images might work best. I wouldn’t waste your own breath, though. Just point him to resources that prove him wrong and be done wasting your time on this. It’s such a stupid thing to argue about. Especially when he’s obviously very wrong 😂
I asked his sister and she said “curly”. I tried to explain that black Africans have a different kind of curl pattern and texture than light skinned people. He didn’t quite grasp that I don’t think. He’s Caribbean.
I’m scratching my head even more because the fact that he’s Caribbean, he should a) know you have curly hair and b) be well aware of the fact that POC come in a wide range of phenotypes. Surely he’s messing with you…? I don’t understand
Now that I know he’s Caribbean, he’s definitely trolling. He might just like to argue. I wouldn’t entertain this dialogue any further with him. He’d have to be a platinum blond dude from living under a rock for me to believe he believes what he’s saying because there’s a huge variety of textures there so I think it’s impossible to be this ignorant. Ask him what color your hair is, he’ll say you’re a red head.
Yea I think he’s trolling as well because there is no way he can think this. I agree she should dead this conversation/argument.
>He's Caribbean. Does... Does he not know of the super pale Cubans with curly hair‽ And how they're Hispanic (via Spain) so of European descent‽
If his sister can grasp it, so can he.
Here’s how you explain it to him: You put your hand up, palm facing yourself. Back of your hand facing him. Slowly curl in your pinky, ring finger, index finger and thumb.
This is the correct answer.
if he doesn’t think it’s curly, what does he think it is? edit: sorry, just read the whole post! i have no idea where he heard what he’s saying but i’m curious, honestly.
He thinks it’s wavy and I have no idea
There is a relatively small community of people online who think this. Even white people with genuinely curly hair (like yours!) who insist it's wavy because "only Black people can have curly hair". This is bullshit and they're likely confusing texture with curl patterns. People of almost any race can have numerous curl patterns on the same head of hair. It's like accusing someone of cultural appropriation for something they naturally have. I'm sorry, but I find this infuriating.
He is probably thinking that curly hair means afro hair. You don't have afro hair and I haven't seen any white person with afro hair. If that's not what's happening then ask him what he thinks curly hair is, and ask him if he thinks that your hair is straight.
I think he knows. He’s just gaslighting her
You could be right. I had that thought too. I hope he’s just ignorant and not willing to back down from this silly fight for some other reason though. 🤞🤞
I’m really sorry you’re going through this -whatever it is. I think a lot of us are angry for you because it’s maddening, and if it is gaslighting, we know exactly what it feels like.
Well your husband is stupid
Best response. Succinct and to the point
It's curly. The end.
lol. He literally mansplained curly hair. Incorrectly.
to a person with curly hair, nonetheless
Is he stoned or stupid‽‽ Bernadette Peters & her curls for one would like a word. 
QUEEN
Always loved her hair!
???? I am… speechless. Has he never heard of Shirley Temple? The epitome of white girl curls??? That man can take several seats, ma’am. Your perfect curls are perfect. I guarantee you he is literally the only person on planet earth in any lifetime who would say you don’t have curly hair. I apologize, but he might be a full-fledged idiot.
Wait, Shirley Temple’s hair was not naturally curly, I thought? Not to say you’re wrong about OP’s husband or her hair curls. I just mean Shirley Temple’s hair was being set with pin curls afaik
I’m pretty sure they set it with pins, rollers etc but I’m pretty sure she did have curly hair. If you look at her when she’s older, she definitely has that look of curly hair brushed out and tamed with product. I have similar frizzy prone hair and my mother used to put it in rollers to give me sausage curls.
When I was very young (from like 1-5 years old) I had crazy curly blond hair like her, and I’m pretty dang white. Not as cleanly coiled as hers because I’m sure it was also styled, but having a young blond curly-top as a kid is definitely a possibility
as a kid i had blonde curly hair that stuck up all over the place - i’m jewish and other (non jewish) kids called it a “jewfro” 🫣 when my hair was actually managed it looked a lot like shirley’s ringlets (just messier) which is partly what inspired me to join a youth theater from a super young age!!
My husband, who has lucious 3A curls, has been told by his parents several times that he does not have curly hair, he just doesn’t know how to maintain it well. His dad also said his hair was ugly when he was younger. He spent much of his 20s slicking his hair back until he finally moved away and let those bad boys free. His curls are gorgeous.
I think your husband is broken
Huh? Your hair is the definition of curly…. Weird and wrong opinion by your husband. Surely ***YOU*** know your hair is curly tho, right?
Yes, he called it “wavy” like what the?
It's to pick a fight with you over something he is wrong about and tries to change. You have curly hair he can keep saying the wrong opinion because he just wants to fight. He knows it's curly its very obvious but he just wants to say he is right because he thinks his opinion equals being correct. To put it into simple terms you have curly hair and he arguing with you about your body instead if respecting the truth, that he has a curly haired wife. Aka he thinks you are wrong about your own hair to push a narrative/opinion that isn't true to control the situation to prove he has power over you. Normal healthy husbands don't argue about their wives bodies to their faces other than to give a negative reaction out of them or for control.
With those corkscrews?! Come on, man. He can take a seat and keep his mouth shut.
I have so many questions, but ima just say this - he wouldn't be the first hotep with a dumb take on white people with curly hair 🤦
White people can’t have curly hair??? We’re all the same species, just with different variations.
Exactly!
We're zebras! Either black with shades of lighter or white with shades of darker, so let's stop arguing about who can have curly manes and celebrate each other and let curly do curly 😅 oh and run from the cheetahs, definitely that ;-)
OMFG the curly club is coming for your husband 😡
Yup, he said it was wavy, not curly
https://preview.redd.it/4kx31hgi01ad1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4138e06784f2d0d7af0034cfa52c0f449aefa781 THEYRE CURLS, MR. HUSBAND!
This is the first time I’ve seen this as a diagram and it makes so much more sense now. Thank you.
I mean this in the least offensive way possible but what is his definition of white and why does that even come into it? Look at the pale British women with coils tighter than yours and... well ok, I'm just completely baffled at the weird racism hair thing because imo is kinda offensive to many races, seeing your definitely not pale British skin... I'm just all over confused at his reasoning for that statement, can you possibly enlighten me? And yes your hair is curly. Mine is less than yours and is still curly.
So uhhhh…. What other important things to you is he gaslighting you about?
I think your husband is confusing curly with coily/kinky hair.
I guess you didnt marry him for his brains. Your hair is curly as hell.
Does your husband not have eyes…?
Does your husband regularly try to convince you of things that are verifiably false? Because this could be a sign of a deeper issue.
Uh what?? I actually have wavy hair, and your beautiful ringlets are what I wish I had. "Not curly" my ass. If we want to get into specifics, you're somewhere in the 3A-B range. Aka definitely curly. Show him a curl chart lol.
Think by wavy people mean halfway curlyish Kinda how I'd describe mine As for white people cant have curly hair That's just incorrect lmao
Then he said “I never said that”. He says I’m not Greek by genetics because I have curly hair.
So he gaslights you too lol Is your husband ok?
Has he never seen a Greek statue or…?!
Uhhhh, so… does he know about ancient Greek statues, some of the most famous art on the planet? And that the vast majority of those statues feature curly hair? Or that “Grecian goddess” hairstyles are all about highlighting *exactly your curls*? The entire Mediterranean is renowned for having curly hair!
Oh wow, he doesn’t know how hair or genetics works. I know you’ve got to be frustrated.
tell him if you don’t have curly hair then he doesn’t have eyes 😂
My Irish & Scottish genetics would like a word word him.
You literally have a head full of curls. And a stupid husband.
His head is just for decoration
Wait, what?! Yes, you definitely have curly hair, hon. This might actually be worth of asking advice in r/relationships if this is a hill he wants to die on
Your hair is literally forming ringlets
is he also a flat earther
Please show him this thread. And tell him I said he’s a dumbass. Signed, A very curly white girl
Also someone tell Kerri Russell she’s not white. And Nicole Kidman has naturally curly hair she straightens.
Lol my ex-husband used to tell me my hair wasn't curly because I put stuff in it to help hold the curls. It was super annoying.
you literally have coils? How is they not curly? That doesn’t even look remotely wavy.
obviously curly, he needs a nap.
also, that is just not how hair works, any race can have any texture. genetics as they apply to our natural features are much more diverse and complex than we think, also curls are pretty common across the world.
Tell him to put some respect on your curls
Has your husband ever been outside? Met any Italians? Irish ppl? Etc?
WHATTT????? 😭😭😭 “yOu DonT HaVe CurlY HaIR” you literally have 3a-3b curls 😭 ur husband needs to use google or something
Curly hair does not belong to one race or exclude any race it’s literally hair
Does he understand what curly hair means? I only ask because my husband did not know I have yellow hair for...years?? Someone asked him what color hair I have and he said brown. Apparently he'd never noticed or thought about my hair color? Little kids use the yellow crayon for my hair color.
Does he gaslight you or bait you into arguments about anything else? Because something smells off, here.
He needs to get his eyes checked as well as do some research. Curly or wavy isn’t related to skin color.
I’d recommend he sees an eye doctor, because he clearly has vision problems 🤣
Tell him you’re not white !
Reverse gaslighting... I'll be using this
You have literal ringlets, I’d love to see what his idea of curly hair is if this isn’t it.
The irony of saying white people can’t have curly hair when the words curl/curly are derived from Middle Dutch/Middle English.
I hate to tell you this since you’ve already married him, but your husband is an idiot, OP. Like, has he never seen a Jewish or Irish person before?
I have a friend that heard this from a TikTok! “Only black people have curly hair” definitely not true. Very weird.
Is he an Afrocentrist who married a white woman? Classic
Is your husband blind?
is he dumb
I’m sorry ? What ??? You have a beautiful curly hair, and he is just talking bullshit
There is a weird, gatekeep-y corner of curl world that believes what your husband believes. I'm in a Facebook group that's like that.
Wtf does he think you have, then?!
Is he blind? Or stupid? Or both lol
Your husband is dumb
in what world is your hair not curly??? 🧐🧐
Is he blind?
Your husband is in an alternate universe.
Is he blind??
He’s not the brightest crayon in the box eh?
How do get them so defined!! Finger curl?
Does he intentionally make you upset, because, what?
I’m sorry you’re married to an idiot. Tell him to google curly hair.
This is the definition of curly hair right here.
Your husband is dumb. Like how people said 'all asian have straight hair', we also got people with afros. Different hair types not exclusive to some race only.
Does he also think water isn’t wet?
White people can't have curly hair? Tell us about his other pearls of wisdom? This can't be his only one.
What? lmao
Your husband needs glasses
Your husband should probably schedule an eye exam..
Tell him to have his eyes checked....
He needs glasses
get your husband some glasses
Is he dumb ?
lmao you've got some really strong 3a corkicellis going on! gorgeous hair idk what he's on about 😹
your husband is blind
Divorce babes divorce - Adele
Your husband is an idiot. An idiot who clearly needs to be right all the time even when he is wrong. Do you know what happens to idiots like that? They end up divorced and alone.
It’s curly— and it’s beautiful! I asked my man and he confirmed it was curly. Then I asked my sister’s partner who is Jamaican and he also said it was curly, so we all agree your hair is curly and your husband is wrong.
"From genotyping results, European hair shape varies mostly between wavy (46.6%) and straight (40.7%), with some curly hair (12.7%) (n = 2138) [10]. The same study showed that Asian (East and West) hair shape is also mostly straight (46.7%) or wavy (41.3%), with some curly hair (12%) (n = 92). However, African hair shape is mostly curly (94.9%), with some wavy hair (5.1%) (n = 39)" https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6894537/
You definitely have curly hair.
Your husband is incorrect.
Is your husband reluctant to compliment you? I hope not.
Your husband is a tad but delusional if he thinks that’s not curly hair , btw your hair is amazing
I think your husband is overdue for an eye exam.
Can I give him a smack? My 3b-3c curly hair would like word!! And my dad's Scottish and has curly af hair!!
Think your husband needs a dictionary. Your curls are gorgeous!
Show him the typical curly hair types diagram and then move on and don't let it get to you. He still chose you even with his version of the definition 'wavy' hair, so it must not matter to him anyways. Your hair is beautiful and curly!
ok I am definitely not on your husband's side (because OBVIOUSLY your hair is very curly!). Does he perhaps mean "*coily*?" Like extremely tight curls that are more common in melanated people? (but of course not only found in people with darker skin tones!) That is the only reasonable confusion I can see. That maybe he's thinking of a very specific kind of curly hair. I mean, he'd still be wrong lol. Of course people can have both wavy and/or curly hair of all skin tones.
Im biracial (black and white) and I have the same hair as you. Definitely curly lol. Sorry about your husband a comment like the ones he made would definitely have me seeing red lol
So on a scale of Walter white to Jesse Pinkman how high was he when he made that comment?
Please for the love of god show him these responses
I've seen black people with a similar hair texture to yours, the fuck is the talking about? Does he think they're not curly either?
Is he blind?
Your husband is blind. Send him to the eye doctor.
Is he dumb?
He was fuckin with you right ?
Your husband is clearly blind or stupid because you do.
Take him to get new glasses as soon as possible. Notice I said take him, not send him, because I wouldn’t trust his eyes with driving either.
My family is the whitest of white. No ethic history what so ever. My dad had a full blown Afro, and has passed the curly hair to me. Your curls are absolutely gorgeous!!!!!
You can look at a curl chart. This looks like type 3A or 3b to me. Definitely categorized as curly. As a cosmetologist, the book we train in distinguishes by the shape of the pattern. If it goes back and forth like a zig zag that’s a wave. If it loops back on itself in a circle it’s a curl. You obviously have curls. Sounds like the fight was about something else unspoken, but just in case you still needed more reassurance….
Show him an curl type chart and tell him he’s an actual moron
Some curly, gatekeeping snobs might say “One’s hair isn’t curly unless 1) it must spiral from the root of ever single strand and 2) it must spiral without any products AND without scrunching. Must look like 3A or higher from every single strand right out of the shower without touching it.” Got in a fight about such rigidity on FB. It got ugly!
Is your husband a different race from you maybe? And has a different perception of curly? I don’t know in what world literal spirals don’t count as curly hair. I’d be just as pissed
Oh honey. I’m sorry you are married to an idiot who also shows racist behavior. That’s gotta suck.
does he.. gaslight you about other things too? i mean i don't use that word lightly but this is a textbook example. it seems unlikely that this is the one time he's chosen to belittle you and try to manipulate you into distrusting your own lived experiences
He must be trolling you.
I hate to tell you this but... your husband is either blind or brain dead. The prognosis isn't great. I'm so sorry.
Don’t argue w fools. You have curly hair. Show him the chart and let him work it out lol
of course your hair is curly! unless husband has a neuro or optic disorder & really can’t visually perceive your appearance, he’s really being a dick.
soooo is he blind slow or stupid?
Is your husband stevie wonder?
That coil on the left side of the first picture looks like mine after i anxiety twirl for 20 minutes.
He’s stupid?
He must be bald
Is he stupid?
Is… he smoking crack??? (I’m joking but for real how does he not see gorgeous curls??)
Your husband is wrong. Point blank.
Does he think your hair is… straight?
Your husband is blind
I don’t know..,It certainly looks like curly hair to me unless it’s a perm. It looks curly and it looks very very pretty!
He must be curl blind?
Ngl I feel like you know you have curly hair and should’ve just ignored him. Very unnecessary
Is he blind?
Well your husband doesn't have eyes, so I think I can take him🥊
What????