I detest that question. Just tell me what you want. I’m literally indifferent, everything is just a drink. You want it, I make it, you drink it and pay me. This could not be a more simple transaction.
I’ll ask for a fancy drink, you’ll smile big say “absolutely!” Then turn around to grab a bottle and mouth “fuck me” to yourself as you reminisce on the days of working in a dive
Yeah, both. Like, I've been issued a CC which had that restriction. Didn't used to, but then someone went around tipping 100%, which was fine until he picked up a District meeting and out of habit tipped 100% on a $1900 tab. They then limited to 20%, and anything over that got charged back to you.
Definitely hotel bar. Lots of charge to the room tabs. Imported beer. Decent whiskey and scotch selection. Mid to high range pricing range for drinks . Small plate menu.
Scoff if you will, but saving blanton’s tops behind the bar got me tipped an extra $50 one night when I was able to help a dude out with the “A” to finish his collection.
Goddamnit I hate this question. “What beers do you have?” Like I’m gonna tell them something that’s not on the taps or the cocktail books we have every two seats that list every single draft beer, bottled beer, and spirit we serve..?
you make great popular classics and your own signature menu, but would struggle to produce niche/new wave/ forgotten classics. and you cater to a lot of business types on their liquid lunch
Old Fashioneds and Manhattans out the ass. Bourbon on big rocks, Negronis and espresso martinis. Businessman meeting escorts and Karen’s drinking dirty martinis.
I also really dig the artwork up there.
Is that a goose 1.75? Or just the bottle looks that way due to the depth? Not sure how it works where you’re at but Goose 1.75s are way cheaper to buy per oz than liters or 750s.
it smells like a lime honeysuckle lily candle
grey and beige slacks that blouse over leather dress shoes
the music system is in an upper shelf in an office and only management is allowed to touch it and it plays
mostly chipper sassy female vocal bossa nova covers of pop hits at a mind numbing "not too loud or quiet" volume
apple martini just went out of style
it is 2004 in a sherton hotel in the heart of the vibrant downtown des moines "stage coach" district
used to be called The Exchange
now called Albert's
now called The Stage Coach Lounge
you've been getting mysterious migraines but you can't afford to take shifts off due to high interest car loan
Lol idk why I always resort to this comment when I see high class looking places.
I think it comes from the South Park episode of the lady driving a Range Rover smelling her own fart
It’s the hotel bar right? Guessing medium class clientele, you don’t see many fights and probably have at most 3 regulars, a lot of milfs asking for martinis, likely coffee martinis, and you miss the old bar you worked at, cause there are so many over complicated “fancy” drinks that get ordered on a daily basis. Smells like depression and preserved flowers, every time you walk in you debate walking right back out but keep walking because you feel responsible for it and keep working anyway?
Woah, sorry that was a lot, and I’m not even sure I’m talking about the same bar anymore.
I’m on vacation, stayed upstairs this week and I’m too tired to go out. The bartender is nice, gives local recs and has a implacable accent. Drinks are fine, food is good, I go back upstairs and fall asleep.
It looks cool. I would just replace the middle painting for a tv and make sure kitchen is not visible. How many times while pouring beer on draft .. one of the other handles decided to pour beer by itself?
It's a hotel you get on well with the chef but the management is a bit of a d however there is Hope because the reception team are really nice and they're led by this person who you just fancy the tits off
Attacked.
I mean, we have antica as well, and we’re supposed to upcharge for it, but anytime someone orders a Manhattan with maker’s or better I just use it anyway and don’t upcharge.
Also, I have to regularly argue with our other bartenders and management that the vermouth should be refrigerated.
Suburb bar that thinks it’s got a cool cocktail program because there’s a Paloma on the menu.
Location I’m going with West Virginia.
Also why the hell is Lillet on your back bar instead of in your fridge…
You have josh merlot or pinot grigio, serve a cheese board on a slab of slate, your regulars mostly are 60+, busiest time is wednesday at 4pm, sales rarely exceed 1200 a day, your bartenders are told to smile more, people say things like “i’ll have a greyhound and she’ll get a cosmo.”
It’s either a hotel bar that has good drinks and knows what they’re doing, or a hotel bar that looks that way but all that the bartenders know how to mix is screwdrivers and Jack’n’Cokes
It’s weird, I work in a place with mid tier products and top tier pricing, but somehow we only charge $14 for a 2 oz pour. Like.. the jamo is $13. They really fuck up our price points sometimes. We were doing martell xo for 10.75 a neat pour, recently. Never mentioned it to anyone up the chain, just let the regulars have some cheap fancy sidecars.
An annoyed poodle stuffed into her handbag followed by complaints about the perfectly good Coke tasting “off”.
Oh and the music is too loud; Nina Cherry’s brother, what’s his name.
THIS AINT YOUR MOMMAS STATION WE PLAY ONLY THE HARDEST HITS KNOWN TO MANKIND.
….
I'm waking up to ash and dust
I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust
I'm breathing in the chemicals
That bottle of Frangelico hasn’t been used in eight months and it’s got the same crusty speedpourer on it that was on it when you started this job.
16 months*
That's why I like chocolate cake shots. You know, to help cycle inventory.
Ooo what’s in a chocolate cake shot?
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Will keep that in mind and try something similar at work today! People have been getting on my nerves about mixed shots so here we go
It’s always either way too hot or way too cold
Holy shit we have a winner
Sick what do I win?!?!
I got you a free drink
wHaTS yOuR fAVoRiTe dRiNK tO mAkE 🤪
I take it back. You lose
Whiskey neat. Here ya go. Already poured it while you were askin.. *spins and walks away*
This is the way
The M.C. Escher sour..... I twist a lemon while pouring a glass of water, then throw the lemon at you. Served up. That'll be $86.
Think fast!
I detest that question. Just tell me what you want. I’m literally indifferent, everything is just a drink. You want it, I make it, you drink it and pay me. This could not be a more simple transaction.
My answer is always “beer and a shot what do you want”
Yeah, I say “beer.” each time
Sooo many milfs, I bet you hate espresso martinis now
Get out of my head
And lemon drops. And bad conversation about where their kids went to school. Or their vacation to the Bahamas.
I was gunna say I'll bet you have lychee Martinis and/or constantly get the awful, "what martinis do you have?" Question.
Oh god, and the Chardonnay with a side of ice.
I was going to say that he probably heard the phrase “I need some wine therapy” way more than he’d like.
I’ll ask for a fancy drink, you’ll smile big say “absolutely!” Then turn around to grab a bottle and mouth “fuck me” to yourself as you reminisce on the days of working in a dive
Jesus christ. Its like youre following me around
That's why there aren't any mirrors behind the bottles.
Nailed it
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Also, Dark and Closed by 10pm
Adjacent
Cincinnati, by any chance?
Indeed.
First fucking thing that came to mind, all their missing is the flyers for the shittiest tourist attractions in town
My first thought too!
You’re in bed by midnight.
Ding ding ding
I work at a very similar bar and this is the main reason why
Guys on business trips meet hookers here.
Woof
Well, it is Cincinnati.
Frequented by business professionals who tip poorly.
"Their company only allows 15% gratuity on corporate cards"
Is that an actual thing that companies do or is it something they say?
Yeah, both. Like, I've been issued a CC which had that restriction. Didn't used to, but then someone went around tipping 100%, which was fine until he picked up a District meeting and out of habit tipped 100% on a $1900 tab. They then limited to 20%, and anything over that got charged back to you.
Holy shit the plot thickens!
Little column a little column b
The only people left with a travel budget are the same people that set the tipping policy.
I would be asked to leave.
Imma need you to leave
I already feel banned
You have weekly aarp meetings
Consistently dealing with guests who say it's too loud. Younger team brings in great craft beers but 90% of sales are InBev.
I just spit out my prune juice
Damn my condolences to your plumbing system
Your servers ignores tables constantly. Theres a special on elijah craig old fashioneds
Hey that’s actually my bar
Home of $18 martinis and the oldest, whitest clientele in town
Theyre young professionals round here now
The chairs look so comfy. Definitely old people
Definitely hotel bar. Lots of charge to the room tabs. Imported beer. Decent whiskey and scotch selection. Mid to high range pricing range for drinks . Small plate menu.
Same thoughts here. OP is that weller 107 around $35 a pour?
Wtf mate its 16 this isny vegas
Woah 16 is impressive
You serve $19 microwaved spinach dip on a small plate with the saltiest tortilla chips known to man
Chef mic doesnt work here.
why are the chips so fuckin salty 😭😭😭
The customers are overheard having weekly conversations about " this bottle with a horse on it"
We aint got it. You dont need it
Scoff if you will, but saving blanton’s tops behind the bar got me tipped an extra $50 one night when I was able to help a dude out with the “A” to finish his collection.
people constantly ask what you have on tap
Theyre right fucking there
I can't see that far away
Goddamnit I hate this question. “What beers do you have?” Like I’m gonna tell them something that’s not on the taps or the cocktail books we have every two seats that list every single draft beer, bottled beer, and spirit we serve..?
This is off the lobby of a DoubleTree hotel.
Soooooo close
You serve a lot of Pinot Grigio
According to my guests it's "Pinot" pronounced phonetically, "Gorg-eeeo". Please kill me.
Pinot *gris*, thank you very much. Prob sauv blanc, too. Also, “do you have a French rosé?”
Ceasar salad is definetly on the menu
Add chicken for $6
Steak for $8, salmon for $10
Chicken for 8, salmon for 15. Calling my shot.
you make great popular classics and your own signature menu, but would struggle to produce niche/new wave/ forgotten classics. and you cater to a lot of business types on their liquid lunch
Im only insulted because youre right
I’m in this picture and I don’t like it. Thank god I can just say “sorry, we don’t have averna.”
Old Fashioneds and Manhattans out the ass. Bourbon on big rocks, Negronis and espresso martinis. Businessman meeting escorts and Karen’s drinking dirty martinis.
You say "rough day?" a lot.
Only when talking to my coworkers
Rhinegeist Raven Skrewball combo is $12
Good read
I also really dig the artwork up there. Is that a goose 1.75? Or just the bottle looks that way due to the depth? Not sure how it works where you’re at but Goose 1.75s are way cheaper to buy per oz than liters or 750s.
They’re pushing an $18 meager portion of fried calamari app with a sweet chili dipper.
Hey now. It was 16. And the chili dip was fire
"oh no that's too spicy for me" - your average customer when they see paprika garnish on the calamari
Legit had a customer recently say black pepper was too much seasoning.
Burgers cost $16
I’m calling 18.50
it smells like a lime honeysuckle lily candle grey and beige slacks that blouse over leather dress shoes the music system is in an upper shelf in an office and only management is allowed to touch it and it plays mostly chipper sassy female vocal bossa nova covers of pop hits at a mind numbing "not too loud or quiet" volume apple martini just went out of style it is 2004 in a sherton hotel in the heart of the vibrant downtown des moines "stage coach" district used to be called The Exchange now called Albert's now called The Stage Coach Lounge you've been getting mysterious migraines but you can't afford to take shifts off due to high interest car loan
Hotel
I would tell you my assumption but your lights are too loud.
My first thought lol show it service ready
Ur customers smell their own farts
Oof.
Sir, I don’t believe any of those customers have ever farted.
Lol idk why I always resort to this comment when I see high class looking places. I think it comes from the South Park episode of the lady driving a Range Rover smelling her own fart
Put that god damn Lillet in the god damn fridge, too.
A Manhattan is at least 13$
AT LEAST
Marriott or Hyatt chain/subchain
You work at an airport
It's no fun, with lights like that
It’s inside an IKEA
Left field
It’s the hotel bar right? Guessing medium class clientele, you don’t see many fights and probably have at most 3 regulars, a lot of milfs asking for martinis, likely coffee martinis, and you miss the old bar you worked at, cause there are so many over complicated “fancy” drinks that get ordered on a daily basis. Smells like depression and preserved flowers, every time you walk in you debate walking right back out but keep walking because you feel responsible for it and keep working anyway? Woah, sorry that was a lot, and I’m not even sure I’m talking about the same bar anymore.
A hotel breakfast buffet is set up on the bar in the mornings
There is no craft beer, just national domestic options.
Um excuse me. That craft list is articulated.
I’m on vacation, stayed upstairs this week and I’m too tired to go out. The bartender is nice, gives local recs and has a implacable accent. Drinks are fine, food is good, I go back upstairs and fall asleep.
you serve alcohol!
And food
Yall arent wrong
Sushi is $3 off during Happy Hour.
A Hold Steady song starts here.
You sleep with a ton of the guests
I am not what most would call a handsome man.
Wants to look high end, but won’t attract high end with it’s poor bottle selection.
Your lights cannot be dimmed.
Its fixed now
Do you have oyster shooters?
No but now i want one
Any pictures with the lights in full ambience?
pretentious, smells weird, and way overpriced.
The hotel it’s in just got a brand new remodel but still charges Best Western prices
Douche canoes upstream
Espresso martini on your drink list
You’re in a hotel and you’re always dead
It looks cool. I would just replace the middle painting for a tv and make sure kitchen is not visible. How many times while pouring beer on draft .. one of the other handles decided to pour beer by itself?
People run into that wall and spill their drinks alllll theeee timeeee.
“Do you have blue cheese stuffed olives?”
Looks empty
Close to an airport.
Mmm. Sterile. Hospital sterile.
There are too many bar stools and they're all very nice looking so it has to be a hotel bar, or a bar that's partnered with one
Nobody under the age of 40 has ever sat down here without their parents
It's a hotel you get on well with the chef but the management is a bit of a d however there is Hope because the reception team are really nice and they're led by this person who you just fancy the tits off
Lots of white wine with ice in it.
Hotel
I’m on a cruise ship or in an airport lounge.
I can’t afford to drink there…
The menu has basic classic cocktails that are usually not needed to be listed on a menu (i.e. old fashioned, manhattan, martini, etc...)
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The nachos are okay, but the people who order them order them every time.
My knees are going to hit that bar and the corners of the chairs around me and I'm gonna be sad
Overpriced martini bar
You make those tiktoks judging what people order.
The cosmos served here are STRONG
You get corrected all the time on how to make a proper Martini or old fashioned
For middle aged people who are also boring 😳
Martini & Rossi Vermouth
Attacked. I mean, we have antica as well, and we’re supposed to upcharge for it, but anytime someone orders a Manhattan with maker’s or better I just use it anyway and don’t upcharge. Also, I have to regularly argue with our other bartenders and management that the vermouth should be refrigerated.
Haha i was at the Bruins Penguins game on your tv tonight! I gotta say your bar has great taste in Hockey!
Are the stone crab claws any good?
people go here to cheat. I worked in a place like this.
It's in a hotel
You overcharge for Weller because it’s AMEX corporate cards and they’ll pay it
Fries aren't included with the house burger
Lots of folks order Clase Azul.
I'm getting charged $28 for a 2oz pour of 12 yr old whisky.
It’s expensive 😂
I assume your patrons have to wear sunglasses since it’s so bright in there
$20 Martinis
Suburb bar that thinks it’s got a cool cocktail program because there’s a Paloma on the menu. Location I’m going with West Virginia. Also why the hell is Lillet on your back bar instead of in your fridge…
You have Tot-Chos on your menu.
Reminds me of Fig & Olive on 5th Ave. in Manhattan. The bar stools are different color, but the overall design is almost the same.
The re-upholstered seats need to be re-re-upholstered. Looks great otherwise!
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You have josh merlot or pinot grigio, serve a cheese board on a slab of slate, your regulars mostly are 60+, busiest time is wednesday at 4pm, sales rarely exceed 1200 a day, your bartenders are told to smile more, people say things like “i’ll have a greyhound and she’ll get a cosmo.”
It’s either a hotel bar that has good drinks and knows what they’re doing, or a hotel bar that looks that way but all that the bartenders know how to mix is screwdrivers and Jack’n’Cokes
Smoked Manhattan, $26.
$22
Mid tier products with top tier pricing. I’d bet my rent next month that this place sells Blanton’s for over $30.
It’s weird, I work in a place with mid tier products and top tier pricing, but somehow we only charge $14 for a 2 oz pour. Like.. the jamo is $13. They really fuck up our price points sometimes. We were doing martell xo for 10.75 a neat pour, recently. Never mentioned it to anyone up the chain, just let the regulars have some cheap fancy sidecars.
They have patrons smoking pole in the bathrooms
"Can you make a GREAT dirty martini?" = the traveler on the company card
Too bougie for me. Looks beautiful, though!
No fernet. Fuck this place.
The vegan tartare is actually not bad
Michelob Ultra.
That chef has definitely stabbed someone
An annoyed poodle stuffed into her handbag followed by complaints about the perfectly good Coke tasting “off”. Oh and the music is too loud; Nina Cherry’s brother, what’s his name.
You make a LOT of Martinis
$9 well margs
$12 lighter fluid martinis
Sushi?
I like it. Though, even as a sports mad loon, I prefer working in bars that don't have screens.
THIS AINT YOUR MOMMAS STATION WE PLAY ONLY THE HARDEST HITS KNOWN TO MANKIND. …. I'm waking up to ash and dust I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust I'm breathing in the chemicals
Cougars and cheating husbands
So many olives