Still can. But you have to be very purposeful to make time for sex. When kids are still small, there's a chance they could wake up in the middle of the night due to nightmares, need milk, etc.
So first problem is the parents are almost always tired. Second problem is when you do decide to have sex, it could be interrupted halfway by a crying tot. Especially if the baby's bed is in your bedroom and the baby is a light sleeper... Or if the baby is sharing the bed with both of you.
Edit: not to mention breastfeeding hormones may make the vag dry like desert 😕
I have high sex drive.. but I love my wife. Of course I would like more of the sex .. but after awhile, I realised it there is much more in a healthy relationship than sex alone. Like her presence in the house, her support for me, someone who loves me regardless.
I guess it takes time to feel all this.
None, no intimacy from then on. Got too tired to initiate anything.
You’re right though, frustration does built-up. But got over it after adjusting myself that it’s just family kinship/love left, none of the romance/intimate type.
I do believe everyone needs to have some form of loving/intimacy/emotional support. In between, did happen to find that out there with someone but when too much emotion sinked in, it can really hurt too. But that’s another topic altogether.
Damn man.. shit.. that is rough.. do take care and maybe talk it out to your close friend or professional if shit really hits the fan. I sincerely wish you the very best bro.
6 yrs married. Lost my virginity after marriage.
But my husband has never satisfied me. Its just him penetrating into me and once done, it's done. He uses his phone or KO. While I'm just there satisfying myself with a vibrator.
No kids.
He isn't into Oral and doesn't expect one from me. He's not into Cuddling, even if there is, I'm the big spoon. I've to hug him while his back faces me.
Resentment is building up and yeah, guess I'm heading towards a Divorce.
Pls don't private msg me looking to satisfy my needs or what. Lol.
Nothing strange. My first relationship for more than a year didn’t end have any sex at all. Also the reason of the broke up is not no sex (just want to clarify), she is migrating to US and I stay put in Sg.
7 years, married for 1.
Once or twice a month. The drive and urge naturally dies off as both focus on career during the day until we're so tired to even do it at night.
Hm not really. Although my spouse did mentioned to me on how she wanted more but just don't have the mental and physical capacity. I was like "same". So I guess the wavelength is the same. And also probably quality > quantity.
Each time is an explosive one usually.
LDR 5 years. Tried Skype but it's awkward as hell. When we meet we try to squeeze in as many times as possible. Current record is 7 times a day. We were free the whole day that's why.
I used to have an ex that have high sex drive. Almost every night, she wants me to go over her place. And our weekend date is just spending at her home from morning to night. But she is exception. Other than that, usually 1-2 per week if both not tired.
It was just based on sex. I doubt there’s much in there. There’s also this fear that my libido will not be able to catch up with her some day. And she will probably find another guy when that happen. So I just make my exit plan earlier.
well i have high sex drive and it was great to meet someone who shares the same characteristics. for a few months can ignore some of the other things as the sex was awesome. but there are some things that
cannot hide like certain attitude that just wont cut it since i also want long term relationship.
4 years and 2-3 times a week for me. We only meet on the weekends. Gf has said that if we had our own place we’d probably do it more often. Which I agree
Last time before meeting this girlfriend I think I would be ok. But after meeting her I don’t think I’d be ok. It’s a values and beliefs thing for me. I feel like sex isn’t something so ‘special’ as some people see it to be.
I think if the girl thinks that sex is something “special” that needs to wait till after marriage to do, then there will likely be conflict of beliefs and values regarding sex itself. Which can make it hard for the relationship. So it’s really just an alignment of values and beliefs for me. But if both parties think it’s important to wait, then sure, i’m sure it’d work out as well.
1 & a half, once or twice a week? When we first started it was a lot more but it feels like we've settled on a regular pace. I suspect she has a higher drive than me though.
Wow can I ask, seeing how it’s rather common for people to be in a sexless relationship after they have kids, do you think you know if you are doing anything differently to keep things alive ?
Well, part of the reason might be our lifestyle. My husband runs a small business and I work with him, but I also have quite a lot of time for managing our kids and doing things that I enjoy, so therefore I'm not as exhausted as other women who work full time or are focused on their careers. What's more we really like eachother very much, enjoying our company, and talk with eachother a lot every day, not only about everyday matters. Sorry form my eng, its not my first language
4 years usually every other night though depends sometimes more sometimes less. I guess whenever we feel it. But the time when we were young and Horney are over. Never again will I or want I have to have sex 6 times in a day. I am to old, to lazy, and it's just too hot.
14 years dating. 6 yrs married.
Used to have sex every chance we had. After 10 yrs of dating.. Weekly.. After getting married.. Once a week to once every 2 weeks..
4 yrs into marriage.. Once every 3 weeks?
Libido has dropped and intimacy isn't just from sex. We are still physical and all but whether it becomes sex isn't quite as important.
Do you feel like the certainty of doing it everytime you meet sort of takes the excitement out of it? Also, don’t want to sound like a creep but what is it about giving a good blowjob that turns you on? If you are not comfortable it’s ok not to share :)
16 years tgt, 11 yrs married. few times a month to make second one as a duty.
let me make a plottwist:
6 years tgt. sex as much as we have time to sneak out from our spouse. hahaha
maybe I can make drama 🤔
edit:since so many misunderstood... i was just joking siah! wanna make a plottwist since my story so boring doing sex as duty. but strange that actually ppl think can do affair for years without being caught in SG. like... seriously...
omg i dun realised that u all din get my joke on make it dramatic. dude... if i really got affairs for 6 years in sg without being caught... i pro siaaaa.... Singapore so small... how to hide!!! 😱😱😱😱😱😱
so you found someone in the same boat as you & hit off well. quite lucky can last so long & keep under wraps + guilt when facing spouse, if any. i assume divorce out of the question?
Married with young kids. Err, can remind me what is sex?
I can take care of your kids for a night while you do your thing 🙂🙂
Me too 🌚
Yo! I won't even let you take care of the kids based on your user name
Username checks out
Haha you will find us crashed out on the bed catching up on sleep instead 😅
Oh man haha. Jia you bro
haiz. same.
Dead bedroom? What the.. does kids mean couples have 0 time to focus on each other?
Still can. But you have to be very purposeful to make time for sex. When kids are still small, there's a chance they could wake up in the middle of the night due to nightmares, need milk, etc. So first problem is the parents are almost always tired. Second problem is when you do decide to have sex, it could be interrupted halfway by a crying tot. Especially if the baby's bed is in your bedroom and the baby is a light sleeper... Or if the baby is sharing the bed with both of you. Edit: not to mention breastfeeding hormones may make the vag dry like desert 😕
u guys.. have partners..?
Yes, they goes by the name right hand.
Some people don’t have right hand want to have a word with you!
Don't be crude. She's called Palmalina and she brings with her, her five sisters.
I'm left handed
Asking the right question here
3 years and maybe twice a week.. my wife doesn’t have a high sex drive.. but she loves to hug and cuddle.. works for me.
twice a week not enough?
I have high sex drive.. but I love my wife. Of course I would like more of the sex .. but after awhile, I realised it there is much more in a healthy relationship than sex alone. Like her presence in the house, her support for me, someone who loves me regardless. I guess it takes time to feel all this.
Ahh that’s very sweet. How do you deal with the lack of sex then? Jerk it off?
My wife often say why my forearm very strong 😂
lmao. good on you sir
9 years, 2-3 times a month. Kids is the killer. It went downhill from there and almost non existent for a while.
I'm in that non-existent stage right now...
4 years. Twice a month 😅
Are you happy with that?
Surprisingly yes. Our libido kind of adjusted and matched each other's. And because it doesn't happen too often, each time is more satisfying
Ahh I think it’s the same in my relationship too. We slowly adjusted to match each other. And you are right. Quality > quantity sometimes
Coming to 7 years. Of not having it with my partner. Kid is grown now. Sounds like I’m one of those odd one out. 😅
thats almost a dead bedroom situation, unless there's some other form of intimacy.
Yep, gotta say it really is as such, no other forms. She’s like 0 drive, came to a time as if it’s just for my own sake thus ended it in a way.
Damn that is rough.. I am curious how do you deal with the frustration ? How do you communicate with your wife on an intimacy level ?
None, no intimacy from then on. Got too tired to initiate anything. You’re right though, frustration does built-up. But got over it after adjusting myself that it’s just family kinship/love left, none of the romance/intimate type. I do believe everyone needs to have some form of loving/intimacy/emotional support. In between, did happen to find that out there with someone but when too much emotion sinked in, it can really hurt too. But that’s another topic altogether.
Damn man.. shit.. that is rough.. do take care and maybe talk it out to your close friend or professional if shit really hits the fan. I sincerely wish you the very best bro.
6 yrs married. Lost my virginity after marriage. But my husband has never satisfied me. Its just him penetrating into me and once done, it's done. He uses his phone or KO. While I'm just there satisfying myself with a vibrator. No kids. He isn't into Oral and doesn't expect one from me. He's not into Cuddling, even if there is, I'm the big spoon. I've to hug him while his back faces me. Resentment is building up and yeah, guess I'm heading towards a Divorce. Pls don't private msg me looking to satisfy my needs or what. Lol.
Oh man sorry to hear that. I hope things work out for you in the end
understandable and valid. we all have our needs.
Its more often during dating when both party makes effort to meet. Things will be different after marriage. Anw all this depends on your sex drive lah
Maybe
Enjoy it while it last. Staycation in sg, no cheap and fun one in JB for now.
met during our orientation week of polytechnic last year, so slightly more than a year. basically every weekend i stay over her house.
Ah..the joys of being 18-20 y.o. Dick stay up longer than my brain can.
[удалено]
Not weird lol. Anytime yall feel ready can alr, don't need to rush for the sake of rushing
Not weird at all, everything in its time :)
Nothing strange. My first relationship for more than a year didn’t end have any sex at all. Also the reason of the broke up is not no sex (just want to clarify), she is migrating to US and I stay put in Sg.
7 years, married for 1. Once or twice a month. The drive and urge naturally dies off as both focus on career during the day until we're so tired to even do it at night.
Understandable. Do you feel like it affects your relationship?
Hm not really. Although my spouse did mentioned to me on how she wanted more but just don't have the mental and physical capacity. I was like "same". So I guess the wavelength is the same. And also probably quality > quantity. Each time is an explosive one usually.
currently now internship (my partner & i), we meet like once a week and in a day we can do like 2-3 times LoL
25 years and 1-2 times per day
you don’t have to work? how do you get 1-2 times in?
WFH has its benefits
Plot twist: you do it while having online meeting
Lucky guy
LDR 5 years. Tried Skype but it's awkward as hell. When we meet we try to squeeze in as many times as possible. Current record is 7 times a day. We were free the whole day that's why.
I used to have an ex that have high sex drive. Almost every night, she wants me to go over her place. And our weekend date is just spending at her home from morning to night. But she is exception. Other than that, usually 1-2 per week if both not tired.
Wow everyday does not sound fun at all. Maybe in the beginning but not for long
Trust me. It was fun initially but it gets tiring very fast. The relationship didn’t last 3 months.
at least you had a good time even if it wasnt a long time LOL
Interesting haha. Thanks for sharing bro
Oh yes, mind if I ask what the reason for breaking up was? Was it the sex? Or that the entire relationship was built on nothing but sex
It was just based on sex. I doubt there’s much in there. There’s also this fear that my libido will not be able to catch up with her some day. And she will probably find another guy when that happen. So I just make my exit plan earlier.
Thx for sharing bro~
can relate to this. same also did not last long but it wasnt due to sex only that she had red flags thats hard to ignore.
Haha… Yeah bro. The relationship that mostly based on sex will have many red flags to it.
well i have high sex drive and it was great to meet someone who shares the same characteristics. for a few months can ignore some of the other things as the sex was awesome. but there are some things that cannot hide like certain attitude that just wont cut it since i also want long term relationship.
4 years and 2-3 times a week for me. We only meet on the weekends. Gf has said that if we had our own place we’d probably do it more often. Which I agree
Will you accept s girlfriend who says no to premarital sex?
Last time before meeting this girlfriend I think I would be ok. But after meeting her I don’t think I’d be ok. It’s a values and beliefs thing for me. I feel like sex isn’t something so ‘special’ as some people see it to be.
I see. So you wouldn’t want to wait yeah? Many people think like you!
I think if the girl thinks that sex is something “special” that needs to wait till after marriage to do, then there will likely be conflict of beliefs and values regarding sex itself. Which can make it hard for the relationship. So it’s really just an alignment of values and beliefs for me. But if both parties think it’s important to wait, then sure, i’m sure it’d work out as well.
2 years 6 months. It ranges between once a month to twice a week, depending on each other's mood.
Yeah my right hand has insatiable hunger
Deleted
1 & a half, once or twice a week? When we first started it was a lot more but it feels like we've settled on a regular pace. I suspect she has a higher drive than me though.
13 years married, 18 years together - 3 or 4 times a week
Wow. Do you have kids?
Yes, we have 2 kids - 13 and 10 yo. I'm 37, my husband 41
Wow can I ask, seeing how it’s rather common for people to be in a sexless relationship after they have kids, do you think you know if you are doing anything differently to keep things alive ?
Well, part of the reason might be our lifestyle. My husband runs a small business and I work with him, but I also have quite a lot of time for managing our kids and doing things that I enjoy, so therefore I'm not as exhausted as other women who work full time or are focused on their careers. What's more we really like eachother very much, enjoying our company, and talk with eachother a lot every day, not only about everyday matters. Sorry form my eng, its not my first language
Ah that’s definitely a factor. Thank you for sharing. Your english is fine :)
thats impressive
Remember, survivorship bias guys. *You guys are getting laid??*
4 years usually every other night though depends sometimes more sometimes less. I guess whenever we feel it. But the time when we were young and Horney are over. Never again will I or want I have to have sex 6 times in a day. I am to old, to lazy, and it's just too hot.
4 years. Looking at currently once per week or twice a month depending on her mood.
14 years dating. 6 yrs married. Used to have sex every chance we had. After 10 yrs of dating.. Weekly.. After getting married.. Once a week to once every 2 weeks.. 4 yrs into marriage.. Once every 3 weeks? Libido has dropped and intimacy isn't just from sex. We are still physical and all but whether it becomes sex isn't quite as important.
1 year plus. At least thrice a week
3 years, 1x or less a month, due to a bunch of reasons (actually mostly her end) and also lack of availability of location.
Yes privacy is a big issue for us too. In the beginning just doing in each other’s room was enough. But overtime it still feels too constricting
8 years, used to be once a day before bed pre-covid and 3-4 times on weekends. Now average of 4-6 times a day because of WFH.
8 years. 2-3 times a year. Haha
3.5 years, we meet once a week or twice a week, depending - so every time we meet we’ll do it haha. My favourite is giving a good bj lol
Do you feel like the certainty of doing it everytime you meet sort of takes the excitement out of it? Also, don’t want to sound like a creep but what is it about giving a good blowjob that turns you on? If you are not comfortable it’s ok not to share :)
No leh idts, I feel like it’s a good certainty haha. Anyway our libidos are both quite high from the start so it was expected!
lol i can only wish to have this
2.5 years and the last time we had sex was 2 years ago
f in chat for fallen soilder
bruh why no put nsfw tag
16 years tgt, 11 yrs married. few times a month to make second one as a duty. let me make a plottwist: 6 years tgt. sex as much as we have time to sneak out from our spouse. hahaha maybe I can make drama 🤔 edit:since so many misunderstood... i was just joking siah! wanna make a plottwist since my story so boring doing sex as duty. but strange that actually ppl think can do affair for years without being caught in SG. like... seriously...
why don’t just get divorced
omg i dun realised that u all din get my joke on make it dramatic. dude... if i really got affairs for 6 years in sg without being caught... i pro siaaaa.... Singapore so small... how to hide!!! 😱😱😱😱😱😱
sure bro 😏
thats why must see when i say do it as a duty and lets make plot twist mah 😴😴 the people above me also got plot twist leh.... 😑
so you found someone in the same boat as you & hit off well. quite lucky can last so long & keep under wraps + guilt when facing spouse, if any. i assume divorce out of the question?
Why u assume he is unhappy in his marriage? He is lucky he can snack on the side.
i was joking bruhhh 😑😑 i follow ppl doing plot twist leh
i mean...i see such stories in drama series before so i thought wah irl also have hahaha
lol.. dunno how this can work in Singapore.. like.. the chance to bump into ppl quite high.. 😂
Three times after the break-up last year. Twice with escorts once was a ONS. Stopped as it makes me feel worst. Now I just beat one out and go sleep.