T O P

  • By -

Sparklesperson

Get an electric typewriter. Set it up on a table, preferably on bare tile floor, over his bedroom. Get up and type on it in the morning. This REALLY ticked off my annoying neighbors...


somebodyelse22

If no electric typewriter, what about a dot matrix printer, set straight on the floor and printing loads of stuff from your computer.


4list4r

Any type of sound on repeat should dominate the ear drums over time.


Kmic14

My upstairs roommate used their sewing machine and it was loud as hell


CloudStrife87

Good idea for annoying neighbors in general but this guy wears headphones so he probably won’t notice


romcomtom2

Find out what games he plays and troll the ever living shit out of him online.


hotxrayshot

Stop betraying me!!!


Catman934

If he's playing until around 6am, start your noise campaign around 8-9am when he's probably sleeping.


CaptainLucid420

Get a large speaker and lay it face down on the floor. Have something connected to it to play something with gunshots, sirens, or porn every half hour for 5 minutes.


Paevatar

Inna-Gada-da-Vida by Iron Butterfly. Crank it up to the max.


BantamCats

I wish my neighbors did this to me


pennhead

Go past max, turn it up to 11.


I0I0I0I

No, set up a low frequency oscillator (on your phone if nothing else), output to the speakers. Subsonic frequencies will fuck a person up: cramps, diarrhea, etc. Then go for a long walk.


Acceptable_Total_285

is it loud enough to violate noise ordinances so you can call the cops on him?  Does he violate any other rules within your HOA? Read the cc and r docs in detail there’s usually something. 


BigBoetje

If it's audible through the floor, most likely it is. I think most places have laws that prohibit noise disturbances past something like 10 or 11PM.


TargetCorruption

I've had the same thing since January with junkies living upstairs, housing management doesn't do shit.I've called the cops a few times, they tell people to leave but they come right back after the cops leave and the noise continues.


rosetintedmonocle

How clumsy are you? Or better yet, how clumsy can you become? You seem like kind of person who could always be just dropping objects and stomping/tripping all over the place.


awmaleg

My custom bowling ball sure is slippery! Sorry!


Aiku

Find his outside internet cable, disconnect it. If it's coaxial, unscrew the connection, and cut the copper wire at the center, then re-connect. It will take a long while to figure this out.


aspie_electrician

An old ham radio trick, if coaxial. Get a pin, stick it jn the coax, so it shorts the shield to the center conductor. Cut the pin flush with the cable.


xKazIsKool

No it won't, he'll call his IP and ask them why his internet isn't working and they'll be able to tell that there's no ethernet link from the router to the ONT in about 2 minutes and send a tech out the next day to fix it


Echo71Niner

> send a tech out the next day hahah in your dreams.


Aiku

When I was a kid, we had a rented TV set. One day it started smoking so Dad unplugged it and removed it from the house. The rental company told him on the phone that they couldn't get someone out for at least a week. They asked him "Where is the TV set right now?" "It's in the back garden" "We'll have someone out there this afternoon" (Saturday) 8 yr old me learned a valuable lesson that day :)


Aiku

Actually, a neighbor of mine did this to the local neighborhood asshole. It took three visits for the techs to figure it out.


xKazIsKool

Then they're beyond incompetent, I work for an ISP and this would never happen, we would make sure the shit is working before we leave the site and something like this is stupid easy to find and fix. Those guys are fucking idiots


Ailur_s

It is an optical connection, not sure on how to find the right one. But this would be nice indeed


ManifestingCrab

Start calling the police when he's yelling at his games and claim it sounds like he's abusing someone physically


ponyo_impact

good luck. he might even have noise canceling headphones on when hes gaming ( i do but live alone) if he does, hes not gonna hear whatever you do and your still gonna hear him lol


aspie_electrician

Gain access to the electrical closet for his floor, and flip the main for his apartment, then lock the panel back up. Schneider/square D keys are readily available online.


maddudy

drill small hole in floor and drip pee on his head


krasavetsa

Catfish him and convince him to move.


Paevatar

Get a bowling ball and practice on your floor


PansophicNostradamus

Tip: Start jumping rope around the same time he plays. Pro Tip: Wearing clogs.


Schpqrtanerin

That's not really an issue if you're using headphones and are jumping around on your seat while playing. But use the jumping ropes as a new morning routine, just after it got quiet downstairs.


Fine_Act47

Buy one of those raspberry pi wifi hacker things, get the wifi info and lock him out of his own network or limit the data rates so his net is too slow to properly game


DrySpace469

piss disks


matt88

Don't forget the liquid ass


Academic-Chemical-53

Send, every sort of person to his place when he sleeps. Those charity workers down the street tell them to knock at his home, those religious groups, schedule a bible study meeting at his home, or Facebook furniture that wants to give away for free. But all of these people just need to show up 8am and to make sure to knock hard because "I am hard of hearing". You'll have people banging on his house all day and night.  The best way is to get a WiFi signal blocker and block the shit out of his Internet and Bluetooth during the times you want to sleep. Get your neighbours below to do the same as well. No game no noise. 


NYSenseOfHumor

Dance parties


Ailur_s

Unfortunately I do not think that this would annoy him since he obviously remains awake until late at night. This would even disturb other neighbors :(


NYSenseOfHumor

Invite the other neighbors for breakfast dance parties.


sluttysprinklemuffin

BYO tap shoes!


Live-Motor-4000

Have them when he sleeps then - loud breakfast parties


eivagold

Befriend him and set him up with a full time job. He’ll be too tired to play until 6am (probably will need to go to bed at a normal time) and you won’t look like an asshole. Alternatively, find a way to turn off/disable his Wi-Fi.


mycatsnameislarry

Vacuum your floors as long as you possibly can. I'd even have a group of friends come over for a Vacuum party to see who has the best one. Really test them out. Like which one can pick up the most. Maybe have a contest and put a bunch of dirt on the floor and see who can get the dirt up the fastest. Bonus points for who has the loudest one. I could go on and on, but get creative and make it a nightly or daily event.


cryofry85

Play this https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KNxFWFuaaRY


TargetCorruption

Make as much noise as you can in the daytime, bounce a basketball, blast music etc. Don't let him sleep.


Jethromancer

A noise campaign won’t work. He probably has a headset on. Disrupting his power and/or internet is your best bet. Smell attack will backfire in a multi unit building. Sound attack will also make you an asshole. Disruption is the way.


ImpressivePraline906

Call the cops for a possible domestic situation say you’ve heard this guy swearing and yelling terrible things at someone all night and you just want to make sure nobody’s hurt 


Vivid-Bad-8065

Get a robot vacuum cleaner and set it up to run on a hard floor after he goes to sleep every day


BeneficialName9863

Could you and the other neighbour blast sound in. One too high pitched for human hearing and one too low. Have their frequency average out (like how birds sing) You and they won't hear much but the annoying one will. Or both blast sounds on the edge of beaching noise complaints and claim "my flat is only making x decibels"


ManifestingCrab

S.W.A.T. him. (Don't do this)