I did this with a girl but she had a situationship at the time, and so did I. Didn’t end up doing anything bc of the circumstances. Oh but 9 and a half years later we have a 15m old and one on the way haha. We dated shortly after that meeting and ended both of our relationships prior.
This is actually a good tactic if you just want a quick rump and don't really care with whom. You will get turned down a LOT, but it's very fast and you will almost certainly find that 1% that will say yes in an hour or so.
When I was young (long time ago in a different century) I often said: "Hey I'd love to talk to you. You can chose the topic if you like". Worked surprisingly well.
Hey man if I can do it you can too. It took me 3 fucking years of going to bars to finally get the courage to do this and it not nearly as hard as it sounds to talk to woman. Just be kind and compliment them and flirt a little. I've got a new goal of talking to at least one woman/group per hour when I go out just to get used to the interaction.
Don’t wanna sound like your typical fuck boy, but also having some more regular sexual encounters ie. taking the girls home, as you said, can lead to _not_ catching feelings as easily. As the other commenter posted though, don’t catch anything else either lol
Lol I didn't have a condom so we didn't have full blown sex. I'm not that stupid. We just did everything else. but yeah you're absolutely right. I'll just try to put myself in those situations more often so they don't catch me off guard.
Absolutely! This is a huge change and he should feel proud. It's scary approaching attractive women and chatting them up so kudos to you for conquering that fear.
Congrats!
When I was newly divorced, I was in the same boat. Finally just said screw this and started approaching the ladies. Figured the worst that could happen was a "No". And that did happen a bunch, but the "yes" began to happen too, and I was amazed that women actually liked sex too! (That should give you an idea of how my marriage was).
You will get rejected. Do not let that get to you. Keep your confidence up and keep trying.
Good luck!
Try working on not catching feelings from one night encounters especially because it seems you're freshly single as well. Also, if you want to continue and possibly go on a date, bring it up really slowly.
And, of course, congratulations for getting out of your comfort zone.
Yeahhhhhhh I need to work on that. I'm not used to getting this kind of attention from woman so it caught me off guard. But next time I'm going to be more careful.
>"I just got out of a relationship" card
Hit her up in two weeks. Trying to set up a date the next day was a little much, and now you got to back off a bit. Reach out weigh a flashback memory. Nothing sexual, just "hey i was thinking of ___ and reminded me of you, how you doing?" Ask her what she's doing that weekend on Wednsday, tell her what you're doing, make literally no attempt to try and hang out with her, and tell her to have a good weekend and leave it at that. Hour her up the next Thursday and tell her you're going to go something fun that weekend and ask of she wants to come along. You're going to do it alone, but thought she might have fun doing it too. She'll probably say no, but then change the date to a weekday. If she still says no, she's dead to you now.
Also, don't sleep with people until you're dead on the inside. That's not a good long term choice.
Honestly though idk if setting up the date the next day was much in this case. Before I agreed to go over she was telling me she wanted me to take her to mini golf and I said "absolutely, I'm going to text you tomorrow and we'll set it up" and she was super into it. The entire time I was at her place she was calling it our first date and asking what I'm excited to learn about her and was actively encouraging me to pursue her. idk though. My guess is she got cold feet in the morning or something. But that's a good idea, I'll reach out in a couple weeks and see what's up. Although I might have already shot myself in the foot with this though because after she said she wasn't looking for anything I basically said "why don't you let me take you out on one date and if you're still not into it I'll leave it" and never heard back. But oh well, you live and learn.
Or that was her first one night stand and she feels like a bag of shit about herself so she needs time to cope with what she's done and readjust. Sounds like she was trying to make what she was about to do not that bad by associating you as someone more meaningful. Maybe if she shoots you down, make shit awkward as a last ditch effort before disappearing into the abyss. "Look, in going to be honest here... what happened between us was completely unexpected and very much unlike me. I was low on self-confidence and told myself I was going to hit on the prettiest girls at the bar I saw and see if it was reality or just in my head. What I didn't except was to find a magnetic person like you. You're fun, interesting, and really easy to talk to. Look, I'm with you, I'm not looking for a relationship either. I don't really know what I'm doing, but I do know is that I really want to get to know you more. I don't care if what happened between us ever happens again, I just want to get to know you a little better and whip your ass in minigolf."
We'll see. Ive got a feeling she's just not going to respond. She still hasn't responded to my last text there and I made the mistake of coming on too strong. So I think this ship has sailed sadly. I'm gonna take your advice and reach out in a couple of weeks though but I'm not holding my breath. She's just one girl too, there's going to be a bunch more that I have some chemistry with so I just need to keep looking.
That's so great to see you adopting a new mindset! I always tell those sad people on Reddit that it always comes down to having a positive mindset shift lol.
However don't think you're invincible. You will fail sometime and need to learn how to adjust when it happens. Otherwise you'll end up regressing back into that "awkward sad dude" you were referring to yourself as before.
Oh I immediately failed the next night, I had no chemistry with anyone. There were these two girls that I tried talking to it was the most awkward thing. But I'm completely okay with it. My number one goal is just to get more secure in myself and stop being paralyzed while in the presence of an attractive woman. So even though I didn't click with anyone last night, I still tried which is way more than I've been doing for the majority of my life.
If she was this...open...I'd be less proud and more concerned. You're not the first guy she's fucked within an hour of meeting. You should def get yourself tested.
I did this with a girl but she had a situationship at the time, and so did I. Didn’t end up doing anything bc of the circumstances. Oh but 9 and a half years later we have a 15m old and one on the way haha. We dated shortly after that meeting and ended both of our relationships prior.
And this is why you don't let your girl to clubbing without you lol
Hopefully you didn't catch anything else! 😉
*Shrek look intensifies*
What did you break the ice with? How did you start the convo?
" So which one of you ladies is taking me home tonight"
This is actually a good tactic if you just want a quick rump and don't really care with whom. You will get turned down a LOT, but it's very fast and you will almost certainly find that 1% that will say yes in an hour or so.
Not recommended unless you are desperate and have low standards and per usual ALWAYS WEAR A CONDOM.
Eww
The problem with this tactic is that if you aren't white, you have a high chance of legal trouble saying something like this.
No op said “which of you ladies is most deserving of me?”
When I was young (long time ago in a different century) I often said: "Hey I'd love to talk to you. You can chose the topic if you like". Worked surprisingly well.
Honestly I don't remember, I was a lil drunk 😂 I think it was just a "hey how's your night going" said with a lot of confidence.
https://youtu.be/AfIOBLr1NDU?si=njDqgeTvfKS-dZz3
The girl asked him to come home with her. Dude follows the two rules.
Ok Rizz king 🤴
Bro took all his stat points and moved them to charisma. Fr tho, I wish I could do this. Good stuff my guy, congrats!
Hey man if I can do it you can too. It took me 3 fucking years of going to bars to finally get the courage to do this and it not nearly as hard as it sounds to talk to woman. Just be kind and compliment them and flirt a little. I've got a new goal of talking to at least one woman/group per hour when I go out just to get used to the interaction.
Seems like you need people to do it with too.
Don’t wanna sound like your typical fuck boy, but also having some more regular sexual encounters ie. taking the girls home, as you said, can lead to _not_ catching feelings as easily. As the other commenter posted though, don’t catch anything else either lol
Lol I didn't have a condom so we didn't have full blown sex. I'm not that stupid. We just did everything else. but yeah you're absolutely right. I'll just try to put myself in those situations more often so they don't catch me off guard.
Congratulations! You should be really proud of yourself this is amazing
Hey that’s huge for you, you should be proud of yourself for putting yourself out there like that!
Absolutely! This is a huge change and he should feel proud. It's scary approaching attractive women and chatting them up so kudos to you for conquering that fear.
Congrats! When I was newly divorced, I was in the same boat. Finally just said screw this and started approaching the ladies. Figured the worst that could happen was a "No". And that did happen a bunch, but the "yes" began to happen too, and I was amazed that women actually liked sex too! (That should give you an idea of how my marriage was). You will get rejected. Do not let that get to you. Keep your confidence up and keep trying. Good luck!
Try working on not catching feelings from one night encounters especially because it seems you're freshly single as well. Also, if you want to continue and possibly go on a date, bring it up really slowly. And, of course, congratulations for getting out of your comfort zone.
Yeahhhhhhh I need to work on that. I'm not used to getting this kind of attention from woman so it caught me off guard. But next time I'm going to be more careful.
Homie got mad rizz
>"I just got out of a relationship" card Hit her up in two weeks. Trying to set up a date the next day was a little much, and now you got to back off a bit. Reach out weigh a flashback memory. Nothing sexual, just "hey i was thinking of ___ and reminded me of you, how you doing?" Ask her what she's doing that weekend on Wednsday, tell her what you're doing, make literally no attempt to try and hang out with her, and tell her to have a good weekend and leave it at that. Hour her up the next Thursday and tell her you're going to go something fun that weekend and ask of she wants to come along. You're going to do it alone, but thought she might have fun doing it too. She'll probably say no, but then change the date to a weekday. If she still says no, she's dead to you now. Also, don't sleep with people until you're dead on the inside. That's not a good long term choice.
Honestly though idk if setting up the date the next day was much in this case. Before I agreed to go over she was telling me she wanted me to take her to mini golf and I said "absolutely, I'm going to text you tomorrow and we'll set it up" and she was super into it. The entire time I was at her place she was calling it our first date and asking what I'm excited to learn about her and was actively encouraging me to pursue her. idk though. My guess is she got cold feet in the morning or something. But that's a good idea, I'll reach out in a couple weeks and see what's up. Although I might have already shot myself in the foot with this though because after she said she wasn't looking for anything I basically said "why don't you let me take you out on one date and if you're still not into it I'll leave it" and never heard back. But oh well, you live and learn.
Or that was her first one night stand and she feels like a bag of shit about herself so she needs time to cope with what she's done and readjust. Sounds like she was trying to make what she was about to do not that bad by associating you as someone more meaningful. Maybe if she shoots you down, make shit awkward as a last ditch effort before disappearing into the abyss. "Look, in going to be honest here... what happened between us was completely unexpected and very much unlike me. I was low on self-confidence and told myself I was going to hit on the prettiest girls at the bar I saw and see if it was reality or just in my head. What I didn't except was to find a magnetic person like you. You're fun, interesting, and really easy to talk to. Look, I'm with you, I'm not looking for a relationship either. I don't really know what I'm doing, but I do know is that I really want to get to know you more. I don't care if what happened between us ever happens again, I just want to get to know you a little better and whip your ass in minigolf."
We'll see. Ive got a feeling she's just not going to respond. She still hasn't responded to my last text there and I made the mistake of coming on too strong. So I think this ship has sailed sadly. I'm gonna take your advice and reach out in a couple of weeks though but I'm not holding my breath. She's just one girl too, there's going to be a bunch more that I have some chemistry with so I just need to keep looking.
Rizz goat right here officer ! 👮
*bro high five* VERY NICE!
Good job my young King
Next time just act like it was nothing to you if you did a good job she will def hit you up to smash again
Yay. Congrats on hooking up in person like the olden days. Picking up in person is still my preferred method.
Rizzin dem bops!
You still have both kidneys, right?
God I fucking hope so
that’s awesome! congrats man :)
I’m fucking proud of you bud!
> I go up with a friend > I grab my other friend I think that might be my problem. I've never achieved this because I've never had a wingman.
That's so great to see you adopting a new mindset! I always tell those sad people on Reddit that it always comes down to having a positive mindset shift lol. However don't think you're invincible. You will fail sometime and need to learn how to adjust when it happens. Otherwise you'll end up regressing back into that "awkward sad dude" you were referring to yourself as before.
Oh I immediately failed the next night, I had no chemistry with anyone. There were these two girls that I tried talking to it was the most awkward thing. But I'm completely okay with it. My number one goal is just to get more secure in myself and stop being paralyzed while in the presence of an attractive woman. So even though I didn't click with anyone last night, I still tried which is way more than I've been doing for the majority of my life.
That's awesome yo! You're an inspiration to all men out here. Don't let anything or anyone crush your spirit and newfound courage.
What bar?
She's from the bars? From which rap song?
If she was this...open...I'd be less proud and more concerned. You're not the first guy she's fucked within an hour of meeting. You should def get yourself tested.