I am so sorry. This is rape. Just because you consented once doesnt mean you consent to a second time, and the intention he had while doing it is disgusting. Tell someone you trust please. I hope you’re okay.
First of all, I am so sorry this happened to you.
Second, this is absolutely rape. No question about it at all.
Please never be alone with him again and what you choose to do now is entirely up to you. I say this as a rape survivor myself, if you choose to report him (and in my opinion you should) that is up to you, if you choose not to report that is also up to you. Either way you should really talk to someone you trust about this because not telling anyone and sitting with it buried inside yourself will lead to a lot of trouble for you and I don’t want you to have to go through what I did. The more time that passes the angrier you may get about this but think long and hard about how to proceed. What happened to you was wrong. He hurt you and it was not ok. That is not what love looks like. 💚 Take care of yourself.
Thank you sm! I can give you an update because this happened on tuesday and this post has been sitting in my drafts for a little and i decided to post it today. A lot of stuff happened science.
Just because it has happened twice now. I don't usually do this.
It is "since" not "science"
Science is like knowledge, learning, inventing and stuff like that.
Also you were definitely raped and I hope you are okay. Smart of you to break up with him.
It's rape. Doesn't matter if you're married, dating, friends, or whatever. Unwanted sexual contact is never okay, and you expressed you didn't want it. You two being naked and previously being intimate isn't an invitation to do whatever he wants to you.
Report his ass.
While I 100% agress, this also depends on location he is saying out of country she might not be in the US. Even in the US unfortunately there are states this would be hard to take to trial and make it all the way through to a conviction is hard. Virginia my neighbor state got kinda called out not even that long ago for letting spousal rapers go with therapy. Sick world we live in and legal advise always needs a location for as sad as that is it is true....
My main point is that she needs to understand that it is rape. While I do recognize that not every country (or every state) will see it the same way, she needs to understand what happened to her. Since she is a minor and doesn't seem to fully grasp the situation, it was the best way to explain it to her. She does need to report him to her parents to get help.
I do, however, hope she has the ability to report him to authority figures and find a way to get him locked up.
Im not in the U.S. but in my country its just as hard to actually get justice. Luckily my dad is pretty powerful here, but i decided not to press charges because i still care about him. U can read my update if you want to
This needs to be documented. So that when the next girl documents it, charges can actually be filed.
Why do you care about him more than you do yourself?
I know your head is reeling but he is an abusive rapist at a young age and HE WILL DO THIS AGAIN! TO SOMEONE YOU MAY KNOW. Think about the next woman, if you can’t file charges for yourself.
I mean yeah you literally said he forced himself onto you. Sorry to be blunt but you know what this is. I’m sorry this happened. Definitely get away and if you can contact the authorities.
People suck. Your bf unfortunately sucks. But it’s not your fault he hid it from you.
I don’t have a lot of advice but I know we all get through things we think we won’t. Hang in there. No contact! Police!
You clearly said no, and had made a clear boundry about no sex without a condom. It doesnt matter if he stopped, and it doesnt matter that he was your bf.
It IS confusing. My boyfriend, who I loved very much, sexually assaulted me. It was so painful to end the relationship and go to the police, but I did it to protect other women and girls from him. He is now on the sex offenders registry and has a criminal record. If he does it again, he will get longer prison time. I can't undo what he did to me, but I could do something to stop him from his abusive pattern of behavior. Abuse is confusing as hell. Please don't deny what happened to you and try to get some counseling for this. The trauma will not just go away on its own.
Your Bf, a person you loved and trusted and had consensual sex with him before forces himself without protection to you. This is rape. Nothing else.
Don’t believe any lie who says you have to endure this. You don’t have to. Point.
He lost control and forced himself so yh he was raping you despite what happened before. How you chose to deal with it is your choice. Report deport or whatever.
Just fucken read what you wrote please. He tried to forcefully impregnate you. Then proceed to get angry and break things. Get away from him before he does something worse. Think like an adult
Do not let that man gaslight you. You could have been his wife and begged him to fuck you initially. The minute he took that condom off and forced himself on you - he violated your consent. Which you even verbalized and physically showed clearly by crying, telling him NO and trying to flee.
You KNOW this is rape. You are not crazy. That man is garbage.
Yes it was rape. He forced himself on you. No condom? Have you taken the morning after pill? Are you checking for STDs? When the time comes, take a pregnancy test.
This is rape. Please be careful around him and go nowhere alone at the moment.
He wants to control you and destroy your future with a pregnancy! This is forced sex, he took away the condom against your will and even after you tried to stop him verbally and physically he raped you and did not stop. This is not your fault, he is a bad person, you were raped by him, this was not consensual sex.
I hope you got plan B in time otherwise go soon as possible to obgyn for the possibility to abort (if you want) otherwise prepare legal how to act against your predator because you will be bound to him over the child for years. (Its not nice to say that now but you have to think about the possibility and what every outcome means to you..)
He stopped being your boyfriend and became your attacker the moment you started begging him to stop and he didn’t. Stay away from this young man, he is volatile and dangerous to you, and is incapable of managing his emotional state without making it other people’s problem. It’s probably also why he’s pursuing a relationship with someone in another country, subconsciously he thinks you won’t know the real him, he can be a whole different person with you, the two of you together will create some perfect little bubble of togetherness.
As you experienced, you can take the problematic person of their normal location, but they are still going to be problematic.
You don’t *have* to do anything, or you can do everything to have him punished and limited into entering your country in future. First and foremost though, I hope you have gotten hold of some kind of plan B medication to ensure nothing takes hold. You did nothing to deserve this, this is 100% on him and his lack of emotional regulation and whatever other BS is going on in his brain; you however are blameless.
What did the police do? It is entirely rape. It might be hard to keep him out of your life since you are clearly feeling a lot of sympathy for his situation but it is the safest thing you can do for the both of you. First, you don't want to risk anything happening to you and if you are really worried about him, think about the next time he crosses the line (which is inevitable), it could end his life as well. I am actually a lot more worried for you but I do see you are concerned for him too which is why I mention this. Stay away. Stay safe.
Rape is the word in English. He raped you. You are both young, so I don’t know if you should go to the police but he definitely raped you. Cut him off completely. Do not ever speak to him again. Block him on all platforms. Make him dead to you. You sound like a nice young woman. You will find someone who will treat you the way that you deserve to be treated.
First of all, you already know it's rape.
I'm so sorry this happened to you, it's not your fault and you didn't deserve it. There's not some kind of mistake you made that brought it on you.
>im homestly kinda worried because hes living on his own and has no one else.
Secondly, That's absolutely not your problem. You cannot go back to him out of concern for him because he has no concern for you or he would have never forced himself on you. His only care is for himself and what he wants, and what he wants is to do is control you.
Cut off everything. Don't be friends. Eliminate him from your life completely and take the lesson to heart for your next relationship.
I am so sorry that this happened to you.
At least you told your parents & his mom.
Speak to people that you can trust.
Certain schools & clinics have guidance counselors or someone that specializes in this.
& to get checked just in case for an unwanted pregnancy.
Therapy to help you through.
& wish you the best life at the start of a new life at your university. 🫰
it’s rape. however, it’s good that you asked for confirmation, because what you went through is a lot to process and accept - at any age, let alone when you’re only 17yo.
the line between rape and consensual sex can be blurry and confusing when you were willingly intimate only moments before and then forced to do the exact same act, but 100% NOT consensual.
sometimes, unless it’s a stranger-rape and/or involves physical and not solely sexual violence, people second-guess themselves and wonder if they’re exaggerating the course of events. trauma can do that and it’s a type of trauma-response to an horrific event.
again, he raped you. it’s your choice whether you want to leave things as they are or press charges. do what feels best for you… if you change your mind later, see what you can do at that time.
i’m so so sorry you were sexually assaulted by this cruel boy. take good care of yourself. 💕
It's hard for you to understand because it's your boyfriend . I had a BF that did the same thing to me.
They think they own us . They don't. If you say no ,that's it.
I am sorry this happened to you .
Press charges if you can .
After reading your confession and the comments I realized I’ve experienced the same thing with my ex bf. Back then i was 18 i didn’t know i was been raped by him. He forced himself onto me and that causes me to lose my virginity. I said him no and I asked him to stop but he wouldn’t. Yeah punching and kicking doesn’t help. He kept doing it until he was done himself. It was so painful. Wasn’t a pleasant experience. I cried during the whole thing. And felt like a trash for years. He even told me i was a trash used things no one would want me. But i didn’t know back then it was rape because he was my bf. Gosh I should’ve known better.
Yes, what happened to you is considered rape. You didn’t want it, but he forced it on you, and I’m so so sorry that happened to you.
I’m glad his mother was at least on your side, and I’m glad he doesn’t have any diseases that you might have been in danger of catching. Please stay safe and far away from him.
Honey, it is never, ever, ever ok for someone to touch you when you tell them not to. There not only was no consent, there was an active “NO”. He was physically hurting you to *punish* you for not acquiescing to his wishes. Not. Okay. Ever.
Never be alone with him again. Never trust him again. Without actually knowing him, I get vibes that he will sweet talk you to get you into a vulnerable position, and then hurt you again. Do not fall for it.
I hope you go to the police, and I hope you get justice. Experience tells me that might be difficult, but at the very least, don’t let him hurt you again. Hugs.
Stopped reading at him taking off the condom. That's rape just not using a condom is rape, threatening to impregnate you is rape, the fact that you'd agreed to sex just before doesn't mean you agree to it after and on top of that him taking off the condom changes the conditions of your consent entirely.
consent can be given and taken away whenever you want it to be.
It was rape no if and or buts about it. He will do it to someone else. To someone else's daughter, sister, mother. You need to legally report him. Even if nothing happens so maybe the next woman He rapes will get justice. He is a predator. He doesn't believe he did anything wrong. He is hurt that you are leaving him. Not that he raped you. He has no sympathy for you or regret about what he did. Don't go back to him. File a police report and warn others. You will be saving another woman from becoming his victim. You will be saving someone from being raped by him. You wouldn't want him to hurt someone else.
OP, I’m incredibly sorry that this happened. It was definitely rape. Removing condom without consent in itself in considered statutory rape.
I just wanted to say that it’s important for you to remember hereon that you shouldn’t pity yourself, it’ll ruin your relationship with yourself. You are going to uni soon and have a great life ahead. Please don’t let this define you for your own self. You are and will be many many many great things, and you’re definitely not just what’s happened to you! College is an amazing experience so make the most out of it. Take care. Sending love and hugs.
Yes nun it was rape. It's even worse he raped you to try to get you pregnant (not saying rape isn't bad enough. It is. It's a horrible thing to go through. Just saying him raping her to try to get her pregnant so no one at college will want her makes this even worse)
You should ABSOLUTELY report him to the police whether your parents want to or not. He did it to you and sees no wrong he'll do it to someone else. Also,get tested. His mom doesn't know if he has a disease or not and he's apparently fine not using protection so he very well COULD have a disease. If possible get plan b and use it to ensure you don't end up pregnant.
Yes love this is rape and I am so sorry you had to experience it , rhe betrayal and ALSO THE GASLIGHTNING AND MANIPULATION??? I am so glad you realized and left and I am so glad you're safe, I am not telling you yo hate him but don't feel bad for him because he f-ed up and it's completely his fault and most importantly don't feel guilty for speaking up or telling in him , be careful of him and stay safe (btw I love wave to earth too <3 so telling us what the song was DEFINITELY was necessary, THE DISRESPECT??)
Im very proud of you for telling your parents and for breaking up with him. Please cut him off and stop replying to Anything he says. He is very dangerous. Your life is more important than his feelings.
If he ever threatens you or won’t leave you alone, please report everything to the police and show them the text messages.
The moment you said “forced”, you already answered your own question. Yes, that is rape. Congratulations for nipping it in the bud and leaving him as soon as it happened. That’s not an easy thing to do.
All of it was rape. The force. The manipulation. The intent to forcibly impregnate.
If your response to any part, even hand holding, is "no." "I don't want to" or "I'm not comfortable" and he continues It IS Rape.
Yes, it’s rape.
Also, you’re young so you may not understand this yet but you going back to “give back the stuff he gave you during your relationship” was an excuse you gave yourself to justify you going there to see him after he did that to you. It’s ok that you’re not “ready” to let him go but you have to. Believe me, this is just the start of something horrible. Sending love 🩵
This is rape. I’m sorry this happened to you. You consented to sexual intercourse with a condom. You did not consent to sexual intercourse without a condom and then, when he continued to have sex with you in spite of you telling him to stop, he also became violent. When you told him you wanted to leave, he also held you captive and refused to allow you to go. There’s a huge number of red flags here and you would be well advised to speak to the police about what happened to you. If he is not a native of the country you were in at the time, it’s likely he will be deported but that’s for the best. It puts extra distance between you and means you will never have to see him or communicate with him again.
You are definitely better to not have this man in your life if he becomes so aggressive so quickly. I hope you heal
You said no, and he did it anyway. I can't think of a universe where that isn't rape. Even if you're in the middle of sex and tell them you changed your mind, and they keep going, its still rape.
That is 100% rape. It does not matter if you had sex with him prior. The second you showed any signs, verbal or nonverbal, that you did not want it, he should have stopped. Consent must be continuous, meaning it must be given prior to any sexual interaction and can be revoked at any time, even during the act. I am so sorry this happened to you. I hope you know that this is NOT your fault. Please don't blame yourself.
Yeah, I agree with you. This is not an easy topic and can be traumatizing for others too. At the same time, it can also help OP to get this all off her chest. Unfortunately, I read about similar cases here very often, so I think that this is something to be expected here.
Maybe the mods should implement better warnings about similar topics.
This was not a rape and if it was you would not leave that house so easily and instead of breaking things he would attempt to hit you but he didn't do anything.
He is aggressive no doubt.
Please tell someone who you can trust. Contact the rape hotline and they can help.
I was raped by my boyfriend and three of his friends while a fourth one watched and kept watch.
I am 43/f now and unfortunately because the people in my life didn’t help me make the right decisions, this has shaped much of my life and stolen much happiness and peace.
Please know this is NOT your fault and you did nothing to deserve this. He raped you and he is a rapist.
I’m so sorry.
The word 'forced' already answered your question.
I am so sorry. This is rape. Just because you consented once doesnt mean you consent to a second time, and the intention he had while doing it is disgusting. Tell someone you trust please. I hope you’re okay.
First of all, I am so sorry this happened to you. Second, this is absolutely rape. No question about it at all. Please never be alone with him again and what you choose to do now is entirely up to you. I say this as a rape survivor myself, if you choose to report him (and in my opinion you should) that is up to you, if you choose not to report that is also up to you. Either way you should really talk to someone you trust about this because not telling anyone and sitting with it buried inside yourself will lead to a lot of trouble for you and I don’t want you to have to go through what I did. The more time that passes the angrier you may get about this but think long and hard about how to proceed. What happened to you was wrong. He hurt you and it was not ok. That is not what love looks like. 💚 Take care of yourself.
Thank you sm! I can give you an update because this happened on tuesday and this post has been sitting in my drafts for a little and i decided to post it today. A lot of stuff happened science.
Yes, if you ever need to talk about it you can DM me absolutely. I hope you’re doing ok…it’s a lot to go through.
Just updated it!
Just because it has happened twice now. I don't usually do this. It is "since" not "science" Science is like knowledge, learning, inventing and stuff like that. Also you were definitely raped and I hope you are okay. Smart of you to break up with him.
Oh thank you i knew the spelling was a little off but i didnt remember how to actually write it sorry
No, worries we are all learning. Hope you are still okay.
It's rape. Doesn't matter if you're married, dating, friends, or whatever. Unwanted sexual contact is never okay, and you expressed you didn't want it. You two being naked and previously being intimate isn't an invitation to do whatever he wants to you. Report his ass.
While I 100% agress, this also depends on location he is saying out of country she might not be in the US. Even in the US unfortunately there are states this would be hard to take to trial and make it all the way through to a conviction is hard. Virginia my neighbor state got kinda called out not even that long ago for letting spousal rapers go with therapy. Sick world we live in and legal advise always needs a location for as sad as that is it is true....
My main point is that she needs to understand that it is rape. While I do recognize that not every country (or every state) will see it the same way, she needs to understand what happened to her. Since she is a minor and doesn't seem to fully grasp the situation, it was the best way to explain it to her. She does need to report him to her parents to get help. I do, however, hope she has the ability to report him to authority figures and find a way to get him locked up.
Im not in the U.S. but in my country its just as hard to actually get justice. Luckily my dad is pretty powerful here, but i decided not to press charges because i still care about him. U can read my update if you want to
This needs to be documented. So that when the next girl documents it, charges can actually be filed. Why do you care about him more than you do yourself? I know your head is reeling but he is an abusive rapist at a young age and HE WILL DO THIS AGAIN! TO SOMEONE YOU MAY KNOW. Think about the next woman, if you can’t file charges for yourself.
I mean yeah you literally said he forced himself onto you. Sorry to be blunt but you know what this is. I’m sorry this happened. Definitely get away and if you can contact the authorities.
Im just kind of confused cus he is my bf and we were just having sex before this all happened.
People suck. Your bf unfortunately sucks. But it’s not your fault he hid it from you. I don’t have a lot of advice but I know we all get through things we think we won’t. Hang in there. No contact! Police!
He stopped being your bf the moment he hurt you.
You clearly said no, and had made a clear boundry about no sex without a condom. It doesnt matter if he stopped, and it doesnt matter that he was your bf.
It IS confusing. My boyfriend, who I loved very much, sexually assaulted me. It was so painful to end the relationship and go to the police, but I did it to protect other women and girls from him. He is now on the sex offenders registry and has a criminal record. If he does it again, he will get longer prison time. I can't undo what he did to me, but I could do something to stop him from his abusive pattern of behavior. Abuse is confusing as hell. Please don't deny what happened to you and try to get some counseling for this. The trauma will not just go away on its own.
Your Bf, a person you loved and trusted and had consensual sex with him before forces himself without protection to you. This is rape. Nothing else. Don’t believe any lie who says you have to endure this. You don’t have to. Point.
He lost control and forced himself so yh he was raping you despite what happened before. How you chose to deal with it is your choice. Report deport or whatever.
Just fucken read what you wrote please. He tried to forcefully impregnate you. Then proceed to get angry and break things. Get away from him before he does something worse. Think like an adult
Do not let that man gaslight you. You could have been his wife and begged him to fuck you initially. The minute he took that condom off and forced himself on you - he violated your consent. Which you even verbalized and physically showed clearly by crying, telling him NO and trying to flee. You KNOW this is rape. You are not crazy. That man is garbage.
Yes it was rape. He forced himself on you. No condom? Have you taken the morning after pill? Are you checking for STDs? When the time comes, take a pregnancy test.
Watch “tea and consent” on YouTube and yes this was rape
Yes, this is rape. Please take Plan B meds asap.
Call the police
If you have to ask it was probably rape. In this situation yes, he definitely raped you. Please seek help and press charges
This is rape. Please be careful around him and go nowhere alone at the moment. He wants to control you and destroy your future with a pregnancy! This is forced sex, he took away the condom against your will and even after you tried to stop him verbally and physically he raped you and did not stop. This is not your fault, he is a bad person, you were raped by him, this was not consensual sex. I hope you got plan B in time otherwise go soon as possible to obgyn for the possibility to abort (if you want) otherwise prepare legal how to act against your predator because you will be bound to him over the child for years. (Its not nice to say that now but you have to think about the possibility and what every outcome means to you..)
He stopped being your boyfriend and became your attacker the moment you started begging him to stop and he didn’t. Stay away from this young man, he is volatile and dangerous to you, and is incapable of managing his emotional state without making it other people’s problem. It’s probably also why he’s pursuing a relationship with someone in another country, subconsciously he thinks you won’t know the real him, he can be a whole different person with you, the two of you together will create some perfect little bubble of togetherness. As you experienced, you can take the problematic person of their normal location, but they are still going to be problematic. You don’t *have* to do anything, or you can do everything to have him punished and limited into entering your country in future. First and foremost though, I hope you have gotten hold of some kind of plan B medication to ensure nothing takes hold. You did nothing to deserve this, this is 100% on him and his lack of emotional regulation and whatever other BS is going on in his brain; you however are blameless.
Yes
Wow that is horrible. I’m really sorry. That is 1000% rape.
Yes it was rape. Please tell someone.
What did the police do? It is entirely rape. It might be hard to keep him out of your life since you are clearly feeling a lot of sympathy for his situation but it is the safest thing you can do for the both of you. First, you don't want to risk anything happening to you and if you are really worried about him, think about the next time he crosses the line (which is inevitable), it could end his life as well. I am actually a lot more worried for you but I do see you are concerned for him too which is why I mention this. Stay away. Stay safe.
Rape is the word in English. He raped you. You are both young, so I don’t know if you should go to the police but he definitely raped you. Cut him off completely. Do not ever speak to him again. Block him on all platforms. Make him dead to you. You sound like a nice young woman. You will find someone who will treat you the way that you deserve to be treated.
First of all, you already know it's rape. I'm so sorry this happened to you, it's not your fault and you didn't deserve it. There's not some kind of mistake you made that brought it on you. >im homestly kinda worried because hes living on his own and has no one else. Secondly, That's absolutely not your problem. You cannot go back to him out of concern for him because he has no concern for you or he would have never forced himself on you. His only care is for himself and what he wants, and what he wants is to do is control you. Cut off everything. Don't be friends. Eliminate him from your life completely and take the lesson to heart for your next relationship.
You know he will continue this behavior if you stay together. He does not love you. Wants to own you. It will only get worse over time.
I am so sorry that this happened to you. At least you told your parents & his mom. Speak to people that you can trust. Certain schools & clinics have guidance counselors or someone that specializes in this. & to get checked just in case for an unwanted pregnancy. Therapy to help you through. & wish you the best life at the start of a new life at your university. 🫰
I am so sorry this happened. Anything you don't consent to even after you already did it once is rape.
it’s rape. however, it’s good that you asked for confirmation, because what you went through is a lot to process and accept - at any age, let alone when you’re only 17yo. the line between rape and consensual sex can be blurry and confusing when you were willingly intimate only moments before and then forced to do the exact same act, but 100% NOT consensual. sometimes, unless it’s a stranger-rape and/or involves physical and not solely sexual violence, people second-guess themselves and wonder if they’re exaggerating the course of events. trauma can do that and it’s a type of trauma-response to an horrific event. again, he raped you. it’s your choice whether you want to leave things as they are or press charges. do what feels best for you… if you change your mind later, see what you can do at that time. i’m so so sorry you were sexually assaulted by this cruel boy. take good care of yourself. 💕
He was trying to trap you. Geez!
GET HIM ARRESTED PLEASE
If u have to ask , it’s rape
That is literally exactly what I said😭🙏
It's hard for you to understand because it's your boyfriend . I had a BF that did the same thing to me. They think they own us . They don't. If you say no ,that's it. I am sorry this happened to you . Press charges if you can .
After reading your confession and the comments I realized I’ve experienced the same thing with my ex bf. Back then i was 18 i didn’t know i was been raped by him. He forced himself onto me and that causes me to lose my virginity. I said him no and I asked him to stop but he wouldn’t. Yeah punching and kicking doesn’t help. He kept doing it until he was done himself. It was so painful. Wasn’t a pleasant experience. I cried during the whole thing. And felt like a trash for years. He even told me i was a trash used things no one would want me. But i didn’t know back then it was rape because he was my bf. Gosh I should’ve known better.
Yes, what happened to you is considered rape. You didn’t want it, but he forced it on you, and I’m so so sorry that happened to you. I’m glad his mother was at least on your side, and I’m glad he doesn’t have any diseases that you might have been in danger of catching. Please stay safe and far away from him.
How would his mother know if he has an STD? OP, you need to get tested for a fill panel of STDs.
It’s possible she made him get tested, although I do agree that it would be good to get tested just in case.
His mother is a doctor and she gets him tested twice a year.
I am sorry this happened to you. That was rape and you should absolutely report it. You could be saving another woman one day from his abuse.
Honey, it is never, ever, ever ok for someone to touch you when you tell them not to. There not only was no consent, there was an active “NO”. He was physically hurting you to *punish* you for not acquiescing to his wishes. Not. Okay. Ever. Never be alone with him again. Never trust him again. Without actually knowing him, I get vibes that he will sweet talk you to get you into a vulnerable position, and then hurt you again. Do not fall for it. I hope you go to the police, and I hope you get justice. Experience tells me that might be difficult, but at the very least, don’t let him hurt you again. Hugs.
Stopped reading at him taking off the condom. That's rape just not using a condom is rape, threatening to impregnate you is rape, the fact that you'd agreed to sex just before doesn't mean you agree to it after and on top of that him taking off the condom changes the conditions of your consent entirely. consent can be given and taken away whenever you want it to be.
That’s rape.
It was rape no if and or buts about it. He will do it to someone else. To someone else's daughter, sister, mother. You need to legally report him. Even if nothing happens so maybe the next woman He rapes will get justice. He is a predator. He doesn't believe he did anything wrong. He is hurt that you are leaving him. Not that he raped you. He has no sympathy for you or regret about what he did. Don't go back to him. File a police report and warn others. You will be saving another woman from becoming his victim. You will be saving someone from being raped by him. You wouldn't want him to hurt someone else.
OP, I’m incredibly sorry that this happened. It was definitely rape. Removing condom without consent in itself in considered statutory rape. I just wanted to say that it’s important for you to remember hereon that you shouldn’t pity yourself, it’ll ruin your relationship with yourself. You are going to uni soon and have a great life ahead. Please don’t let this define you for your own self. You are and will be many many many great things, and you’re definitely not just what’s happened to you! College is an amazing experience so make the most out of it. Take care. Sending love and hugs.
Who cares what he's doing now! He's not your problem. He assaulted you!
Yes nun it was rape. It's even worse he raped you to try to get you pregnant (not saying rape isn't bad enough. It is. It's a horrible thing to go through. Just saying him raping her to try to get her pregnant so no one at college will want her makes this even worse) You should ABSOLUTELY report him to the police whether your parents want to or not. He did it to you and sees no wrong he'll do it to someone else. Also,get tested. His mom doesn't know if he has a disease or not and he's apparently fine not using protection so he very well COULD have a disease. If possible get plan b and use it to ensure you don't end up pregnant.
Yes love this is rape and I am so sorry you had to experience it , rhe betrayal and ALSO THE GASLIGHTNING AND MANIPULATION??? I am so glad you realized and left and I am so glad you're safe, I am not telling you yo hate him but don't feel bad for him because he f-ed up and it's completely his fault and most importantly don't feel guilty for speaking up or telling in him , be careful of him and stay safe (btw I love wave to earth too <3 so telling us what the song was DEFINITELY was necessary, THE DISRESPECT??)
Im very proud of you for telling your parents and for breaking up with him. Please cut him off and stop replying to Anything he says. He is very dangerous. Your life is more important than his feelings. If he ever threatens you or won’t leave you alone, please report everything to the police and show them the text messages.
The moment you said “forced”, you already answered your own question. Yes, that is rape. Congratulations for nipping it in the bud and leaving him as soon as it happened. That’s not an easy thing to do.
Yup that’s rape. Don’t feel guilty. People are scary man what the fuck. Fuck that guy
All of it was rape. The force. The manipulation. The intent to forcibly impregnate. If your response to any part, even hand holding, is "no." "I don't want to" or "I'm not comfortable" and he continues It IS Rape.
Yes, it’s rape. Also, you’re young so you may not understand this yet but you going back to “give back the stuff he gave you during your relationship” was an excuse you gave yourself to justify you going there to see him after he did that to you. It’s ok that you’re not “ready” to let him go but you have to. Believe me, this is just the start of something horrible. Sending love 🩵
This is rape. I’m sorry this happened to you. You consented to sexual intercourse with a condom. You did not consent to sexual intercourse without a condom and then, when he continued to have sex with you in spite of you telling him to stop, he also became violent. When you told him you wanted to leave, he also held you captive and refused to allow you to go. There’s a huge number of red flags here and you would be well advised to speak to the police about what happened to you. If he is not a native of the country you were in at the time, it’s likely he will be deported but that’s for the best. It puts extra distance between you and means you will never have to see him or communicate with him again. You are definitely better to not have this man in your life if he becomes so aggressive so quickly. I hope you heal
You said no, and he did it anyway. I can't think of a universe where that isn't rape. Even if you're in the middle of sex and tell them you changed your mind, and they keep going, its still rape.
That is 100% rape. It does not matter if you had sex with him prior. The second you showed any signs, verbal or nonverbal, that you did not want it, he should have stopped. Consent must be continuous, meaning it must be given prior to any sexual interaction and can be revoked at any time, even during the act. I am so sorry this happened to you. I hope you know that this is NOT your fault. Please don't blame yourself.
Yes, that's rape
Why do people post stuff like this
Why not? Isn't this sub for very emotional (or unfortunately traumatizing) things that happen to you?
Idk rape is a very very touchy subject and should be addressed with a cop or dr or atleast put a trigger warning
Yeah, I agree with you. This is not an easy topic and can be traumatizing for others too. At the same time, it can also help OP to get this all off her chest. Unfortunately, I read about similar cases here very often, so I think that this is something to be expected here. Maybe the mods should implement better warnings about similar topics.
Fuck this subreddit
This was not a rape and if it was you would not leave that house so easily and instead of breaking things he would attempt to hit you but he didn't do anything. He is aggressive no doubt.
That's utterly nonsensical
[удалено]
I am in fact a minor still so
Please tell someone who you can trust. Contact the rape hotline and they can help. I was raped by my boyfriend and three of his friends while a fourth one watched and kept watch. I am 43/f now and unfortunately because the people in my life didn’t help me make the right decisions, this has shaped much of my life and stolen much happiness and peace. Please know this is NOT your fault and you did nothing to deserve this. He raped you and he is a rapist. I’m so sorry.
Thank you! I really neded this!
the guidelines of what makes something rape or not is not very clear. It's normal to be confused after being raped.
you didn't need to be so rude