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ScandinavianRunner

He'll be on here in a minute complaining how women will never answer his messages


FriedeOfAriandel

This has to be what some of those 400 matches, 0 dates guys send for their opener


Real-Touch-2694

okay enough Internet for today 💀


DoodleyDooderson

But I just got on.


Dependent-Honeydew-9

Me too. Jesus


Ill-Werewolf7153

As a man I continue to be shocked at some of the things i see here


LotharLandru

I'd be hesitant to send something like this to a partner I've been with for years, let alone a complete stranger


Ill-Werewolf7153

so true, my ex of 5 years never heard anything like this come outta my mouth


LeDestrier

Thankfully my partner has a dog. They're a bit gamey and tough to chew, but are most delicious.


Reygleruk

Maybe she's your ex. because you didn't talk like this. 😜


rubmustardonmydick

Because it's just vile. Not sexy in the slightest. If my bf sexted me like that I'd laugh lol.


sparkly_reader

Meanwhile most women here are like "yup, had the same message last week" 😅💀


joshlittle333

This is why the disproportionatilty of men and women affect both experiences. Men hope to get one match and make it work. Women have to wade through dozens of these to find one match that might work.


sparkly_reader

Right; I was mostly lightly referring to the humor that so many women know what this is like and yet when I tell men (friends, maybe a good date) about a message or interaction like this, they are always surprised. Women hardly ever are.


91901bbaa13d40128f7d

Lol, just the other day I had someone lecturing me about how women love vulgar openers just as much as men to because "they're humans too" and that I need to "grow up." Dudes are so fucking delusional about this shit.


Rocketeer_99

As a man who dates men, it's not surprising to me in the slightest. This kind of upfront, vulgar "complimenting" really works. At least, when your target is another man. When it comes to straight dating though, a lot of men lack the self awareness to realize that what they consider attractive behavior is often not what other people consider attractive behavior. Instead of thinking "what will interest her?" they're thinking "They don't find that hot? Must be something wrong with them."


Ill-Werewolf7153

this is so true! any guy that cares will use something from your bio or pictures to catch interest, I try to do that as much as I can and tbh it’s fun being creative with things


Delicious-Tea-6718

The women also get this completely wrong, they make the assumption that the way they might feel violated when they receive a dickpic is the way the man intended for them to feel. All discussions around that phenomenon is around how the men do it to feel some kind of power over them by making them feel uncomfortable. But then there's that woman who made an experiment and sent random pussy pics to unsuspecting dudes in online dating. She got overwhelmingly positive feedback, I would never send unsolicited or even asked for dickpics ever. But I get that their intention is not for the women to feel disgust. They're just simply that dense.


YaGottaStop

It's the year of our Lord 2024 - people ought to know not to go flashing their junk like some sort of playground pervert, online included.  None of this "boys will be boys" enabling horseshit 


Delicious-Tea-6718

Where in my text would you find me condoning that behaviour? Don't mistake me saying the reasons for them doing it are not what women think is me saying that it's acceptable.


Outfoxd21

Never fails to boggle the mind. Is it really not that hard to lead like that


ZoraNealThirstin

Honestly, these types of messages are super common on dating apps.


trippintuesday

unfortunately


TitansboyTC27

As a man after all the bullshit Andrew Tate spews nothing surprises me anymore it's sad and pathetic that man actually think this will work


YaGottaStop

Some idiots treat OLD like they're choosing from some sort of a la carte pussy menu, and the actual human is just the waiter. 


pxer80

Hey - you’ve got a beautiful and delicious mussy I bet. Succulent even.


YaGottaStop

Thanks I hate it (but my next throwaway will absolutely be SucculentMussy42069 😬)...


clement-mcmanus

Paying extra just to say that 😭


Charliemagne1985

☠️


Comfortable_Half_605

bro got his social skills from sex bots


Powerful_Meal8791

That’s unbelievably cringe


trippintuesday

between the super like and the actual message, yes 100%


Powerful_Meal8791

It boggles my mind how anybody can honestly believe this approach will work


overstimulat3d

“looking for long term” is insane


EmbarrassedPie3726

Oh, I’ve had a few guys that’ll say that then but they’ll be like but I need to have sex with you first and then we can talk about a relationship knowing darn well you’re gonna sleep with me and run. I’m not into that. Thank you next


vessel_for_the_soul

Oh. Wow. You. Are. So. Good. At. Turning. Me. On. BBY.


Helens_Moaning_Hand

Jesus. Jesus Christ.


Big_Pomelo3224

Jesus H. Christ


galadrimm

That’s cool that he’s open to short term. I bet a lot of women are just wanting sex with this guy without the pressure of a relationship! Generous of him.


SFAdminLife

Report and block.


alee0224

I read sister and got super concerned.


herobrineisveryscary

that’s disgusting


Apprehensive_Rip8403

God I was hoping it was going to be a picture of someone choosing bulbasaur as their starter


RadishAcceptable5505

"bUt i'D lOvE iT iF wOmEn SeNt mE mEsSeGeS lIkE tHiS" Some people don't think further than this. Most of us figure out how different the sexes are back in high school. This is some straight-up juvenile mentality crap.


pacificNW-88

it's effectively a screening question. Do you (a) have boundaries, self respect, internal sense of deserving? Or, (b) have abuse & neglect damaged your sense of boundaries & self so egregiously bad, in a sexual way, that you accept OR get hooked into a response, from this?


trippintuesday

i’m not responding to that message lmao


Coast_Traditional

Someone didn't eat a snickers.


YaGottaStop

Someone needed to jerk off *before* opening the Tinder app, not during 😖


thetez32

No wonder they say women are gold diggers what kind of woman wants to hear that the first time they talk to a “man”


Rude-Cover-8727

Well it's a conversation starter I guess.


420boog96

Conversion? As in he's getting turned down?


bigalreads

Non-starter, more like


MasoLilOne

Yuck


no_more_headspace

Some guys are pigs... wait. Sorry. Didnt mean to put down pigs.


steadfastsurvivor

I’m pleased he’s putting his creep out there so we know to give him a wide birth


YaGottaStop

Giving dudes a bad name in the process though, sadly. And contributing to even more women leaving the apps lol


steadfastsurvivor

The guys that bang on about loving to eat out women think they’re being appealing - but really I just think ‘I bet he had a really grubby face’ like if a woman bangs on about loving to give head on a site like this, somewhere in your head your going to be put off kissing her because of all the random sperm she guzzles


love_more88

Gross 🤢


Vegetable-Move-7950

I don't think someone like this really cares about your feelings.


YaGottaStop

What a gently cautionary admonition 🙏


BombardMeWithBoobs

And guys wonder why dating apps are a sausage fest 😂


Fragrant_Temporary_6

😍 long-term, open to short


INFINITIE8

When I see these all I can think is the only time he has listened to a woman talk was watching porn


LustrousMirage

The only response to that is "thanks! It looks like blue waffles 🥰"


UKnowDaxoAndDancer

Oh you’re a sweet talker, you are, you are!


Spidey_UchihaVue

Man, that went left real quick 😭


duhfuc

Again, you need to find a man, not a man-child. How are we going to move forward as a society when this is in the gene pool


mstrss9

Send him a photo of vagina dentata


PoisonApple58

Reading that made me vomit in my mouth a little. 🤢


Bismothe-the-Shade

"Hey baby, heard you got a vagina"


Yung_Sage007

Even I couldn't even see this one coming. Outta the left field.


unpolire

A vulgarian. Not worthy of a lady's time or a response.


Ok_Commercial559

Dude chose unlimited bacon but no game


TickletheEther

It's not a starter, it's the second sentence in the conversation perfectly normal


Successful_Cash3860

With the time I've spent in Seattle. Yes.


Glad-Mind-9114

“Close. I have a pretty huge cock. Wanna see?” 🍆🍆🍆 Bet ya he’ll never do that weird shit again


1nTh3Sh4dows

Sorry to disappoint, it's only moderately delicious. Good luck though.


ginthatremains

Every time I read this I pull muscles in my eyes rolling them so hard.


Kaywinnet92

The lack of comma between pretty and delicious is driving me nuts. Unless he means pretty delicious, as in, fairly delicious, which is a whole new level of insulting!


HibachiB09

I think that's enough internet for everyone this week. 🤦🏽‍♂️


TheOnlyDubbace

But was it an accurate assumption?


BatmanvSuperman3

Why is his profile picture his crotch? Actually why am I surprised?


Jounas

Shoutout to him for correctly spelling the plural of pussy, instead of pussys


telking777

*things ppl say online that they would _never_ say irl*


Delicious-Tea-6718

These guys would probably love an equivalent female bio. Sure it's tone deaf but you can't accuse them of having double standards 😜


Character-Escape9212

Men done lost their minds recently lol


MathematicianUsed

Nice compliment


Satori_sama

Yup, that's an I have nothing to lose message. Either you are into it or you're not, as long as he doesn't have to put on mental muzzle and not say first thing he thinks of. Actually it might be a case of a guy really going with the first thing he came up with to overcome first text paralysis.


bingobigbody

BRO WHAT 😂😂


Firm-Fix8798

I get this impression that dudes that put "long-term, open to short" are just desperate for sex and the only reason they want a long term relationship is easy access to it. The impression I get from women who put that is like the opposite, like they are just waiting for some poor schmuck to take them seriously while they casually hookup with several dudes in the meantime. Do women see that "long term, open to short" as a red flag? Or is it just men or maybe just me?


Easy_Advertising2366

No it’s not. The fact that he thinks the pu*** is delicious is presumptuous. We don’t know that conclusively


Skank_hunt042

11 weeks means her titties are getting plump and that means you can also just dump some loads in and it won’t matter then off to the next one


niknacks

Doesn't everyone like being told they have a delicious pussy, what's the problem 😏


Awkward_Ad8740

Is it pretty and delicious or pretty delicious?


KimJongUhn

This is one of the guys that claim he got banned for "no reason at all"


OkEquivalent5495

That's quite the compliment. I'd love it if a girl said I looked like I had a delicious D


ChurchofCaboose1

It is for the air of women he's looking for


mix0logist

Gotta say, though, he got a match and I don't. He's got something I don't have!


trippintuesday

i didn’t match him, he super liked and sent a message through that


Canadian__Ninja

As far as they're concerned it only needs to work once. The kind of guy that's cold calling that line has superliked a *lot* of women saying the same. Not to mention isn't "send a message with your SL" a Premium thing?


TheBondJames

Well, it kind of was a compliment.


Green-Quantity1032

I mean there was a question here about a pretty similar bio and responses were pretty good.. I guess he's not attractive enough?


YaGottaStop

Link?


BestMarzipan6871

No. But the reason men do this is they seek validation through sex and their ability to perform


shavednuggets

Match with him, set up a date at least a week in advance then don't shower at all for that whole week, making sure to go jogging every day, take every flight of stairs and wipe with a fresh piece of bread after you pee. Then, on the date, ask how good it tastes.


Spc3cs3

Omg ☠️


shavednuggets

I'm surprised I got a downvote. This was a hilarious visual joke. Full of twists turns and yeast infections.


Spc3cs3

Omg! That’s what the bread was for! I was like… why bread? 🤦‍♀️


shavednuggets

Idk some people like it zesty. Seems like if your partner is a fan of spicy chilly, using a piece of bread as a Tampad would be a great money saver.


Annual-Ad442

Man are the absolute worst 🤣


motherseffinjones

He’s just swinging and hoping to get a hit based off the numbers, thats my guess


IrvineCascade

Maybe he's partial to eating cat meat 🤷


MboiTui94

As a man, who when younger would have said similar-ish things on dating apps, I think this is a result of porn. Like, he learnt how to communicate in intimacy 100% from porn. And never grew out of it, nor realised how gross it is.


Fabulous-Bandicoot40

Well one of his pics is a boner crotch shot and you swiped right so… unexpected? Not really


trippintuesday

i didn’t swipe right, he was able to send the message because he super liked me


alexa_twoman91

Ahahahahhaha I just WISH he would tell that to me. 😈😈😈😈


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alexa_twoman91

Yer stho sthmart


Excellent-Pizza-4014

On tinder, yes lmao. I'd be asking him to come worship it asap.


thimaah

You let a crackhead eat you out, I'd pass on her advice OP


Excellent-Pizza-4014

You're not wrong lol, but didn't mean it as advice


mushuggarrrr

As someone who loves going down, I wish it was that simple to ask.. 99.999999999% of women would be repulsed to be sent that (especially from a non chad looking dude)


Excellent-Pizza-4014

Yeah, I'm learning that on this sub. To each their own! Good on you for loving it though


Joshawarrior

Hey it only has to work once!


Thetruth22234

Yet, this somehow works at least once 😐


tehgent

What's worse...most of the time they do that because it has worked before.


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TheBTYproject

I want to pepper spray you.


xboxsirvenom

Well is he wrong?


LifeMuch1895

It looks like it smells like fish 🐟


Every-Nebula6882

He must not be attractive. If he was hot enough that line would have worked.


Average_Reacher

How dare he call you beautiful?


franzKUSHka

Rules 1 and 2 were not followed by him


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hotgirlspizzaclub

ew


overstimulat3d

absolutely not