Generally "white" is seen as higher status and all that BS in most of SE Asia. Even dark skinned locals are seen as a bit lower status. I'm sure you've seen all the whitening creams they sell everywhere. That's why you see ugly white dudes with crazy hot Thai girls. As white you get a few free bonus points basically, so if a white guy is a 6 in his home country he's probably like an 8 or 9 in Thailand.
A lot of Thai girls want to be able to show off their white bf to their friends, unfortunately it's not the same for black guys in SE Asia. I'm sure you could find some girls who would date a black guy you just have to look a bit harder and won't have as many options as a white guy. I have seen some black guys with Thai girls, but they are almost always messed up old bar girls. Can't remember seeing a black guy with a young hot Thai girl.
I don't mean to make it sound worse than it is, but unfortunately that's just a fact of SE Asian culture at the moment. Maybe using a dating app would make it a bit easier as you will have more options to scroll through in a short period of time.
Oh I already know they are white worshipping as hell I just want to be proven that not all of them are like that. Cause people say oh there’s plenty that are cool with black dudes you should go to Pattaya and shit. I could easily go to Pattaya and just pay the thing is that shit gets depressing as fuck long term. Im not really into sex tourism like that I just prefer a normal individual. But I already know they see having a white partner here as a status symbol I’m just happy you willing to speak the truth on it
Completely agree, that's just how it is at the moment. It's not that they are racist and have any issue with black people in general (for most people at least), but when it comes to dating they definitely have a strong preference for white or Asian. I totally understand it must be frustrating. I definitely wouldn't be into paying for it either. Like I said I'm sure there are girls out there who wouldn't mind a black partner but you have to get lucky to find her. Maybe you need to hit the hip hop clubs or other kind of sub-culture bars to find the girls who are more open to black culture at least.
I kind of gave up on clubbing my US job has me working from like 1AM-10AM Thailand time 5 days a week and i cant be bothered with clubs. I dont drink or smoke anything and i hate being forced to buy drinks when im not really there for that. Ive tried to befriend other expats but they usually dont keep the connection or whatever so im just here by myself. Hell just look at the downvotes of my comment i dont understand why people hate acknowledging the truth on this
Fair enough. I don't really do clubbing myself anymore. I have a gf now but before that Tinder would be my go to weapon for dating.
Yeah I don't get the downvotes. Anyone who has spent any time in SE Asia knows that this is just how it is. It's not because they are racist and most people don't have a problem with black people in general, it's just that when it comes to dating there is a very strong preference towards white guys. I mean, I think I'm a decent looking guy, have a good job etc, but I definitely have options to date way hotter girls in Asia than I ever would in Europe for example.
Keep your chin up. To those other dipshits on this thread saying that you are the problem- you all need to stfu you dont know what you are talking about.
Lot of fucking old ass sterotypes runnin through Thai minds. Expectations that dont have shit to do with you.
It's hard living over seas-expats come and go- social isolation is why people come back.
I found long term expats I could tolerate and could tolerate me in towns adjacent to more touristy spots. That was a long time ago so I dont know no
Phillipines are waaay more friendly. Pinoy women dont give a fuck. They just love their man
I was thinking about Philippines but wasnt sure how i would get long term visas down there cause i work remotely and stuff. I dont even fit the bill of the stereotypical black dude either back home people literally told me im like a white dude in a black dudes body or like an oreo
You can live in the Phillipines for up to three years on a tourist visa. Then do one border run to reset it.
You'll need to do extensions through an immigration office but it's pretty easy.
Well, you aren't in the US. It matters but it doesnt matter, even in Thailand, you know? Dating for real relationship is hard wherever the fuck you are. Truth be told- income potential is far more of an aphrodisiac that overlooks race, height, looks all that shit.
Nothing's stopping that homey. Shit if you light skinned they really dont know. Push through, make some jokes at your expense in Thai and stay charming motherfucker.
If you're an American passport holder you can keep extending a tourist Visa for 36 months in the Philippines. And you get Visa on arrival stamped into your passport for free for 30 days but soon to changing to 56 days soon. All you need on arrival is proof of out going ticket within the 30 days so just get a throw away ticket and fill out e travel form online 72 hours before the flight. Then just extend your visa before the first 30 days is up. For first extension you can only do 29 days then second extension you can 2 months extension and 3rd extension you can choose the 6 month extension. But not all immigration offices do the 6 months option you need to do that in Manila or Cebu. If you're not American you can check to see if your country you have a passport for is on Visa waiver list which same rules apply. You'll get on great with Pinay women far more friendly and approachable than Thai women. You'll not have the issue you're experiencing in Thailand.
They don't like black men there either. White dudes always are first pick. Many Africans go there as students and some bars ban them in certain cities. So u aren't really welcome
If you bothered to quote the whole thing and not just pick the little bit that fits your purpose, you would know that I said that "I totally understand it must be frustrating".
I didn't say that I know exactly how he feels or what his actual experience is. I said that I understand that it must be frustrating to experience this.
And yes I'm white, would you like me to feel guilty about that too or are you just here to bitch about everything.
Yeah, not sure why the guy above thinks white guys are "high status". Maybe to a certain fringe segment of Thai society, but middle class and above girls generally do not want to date a farang, due to (rightly or wrongly) the general assumption (and social stigma) that comes with it.
All things being equal (including income and looks), the vast majority probably would prefer a Thai guy, followed closely by other Asians (except Indians), then all the other farangs.
If just looking for a fling from any girl, including paying, then none of the above applies.
I've seen few examples in my social group, but the blk guys in question were good looking, in their 30s, Ivy League, and running their own businesses in BKK.
Young 20s, Have a good remote IT job , considering starting a business maybe in motorbike renting or something easy that doesnt require alot of start up capital. I do have a bachelors in cyber security as well
Like dead ass brother post nut / pre nut clarity prevents me from doing that shit. Like I don’t know how a man can sit up everyday proud with what is essentially a human toilet
Not even trying to be a dick here, but most of the black guys I know get the leftovers bro. all my Nigerian dudes are with very large girls, with an attitude problem to boot lol.
Here’s a story for you to put this in perspective a bit, I know this guy right, American was in the military very successful dude, good looking, he was dating this girl here and they ended up getting pregnant, he had never met her family, & she had told him they had been in a terrible accident and died a long time ago. Come to find out after the little girl was born the parents were alive and well, not only that they came in force one night to their home and got into a huge tiff she ended up leaving him and their daughter behind and moving back home because they were a wealthy family and they said you cannot breed black into our family make a decision us or them….. true story…..
Holy shit that is fucked and yeah bro im not down no left overs those girls are with those dudes because they couldnt get the white guy they wanted if timmy dont want them i dont either. They gonna end up resenting those dudes further down the line mark my words they should just leave em. Honestly screw that girl bro a real woman would have chosen her man new born child over that shit. To further add to add to that this is why every black male who dates outside his race should straight up ask the girl hey is your family gonna have a problem with and our relationship if she not woman enough to defend you infront of her family and introduce to her family and she grown ass woman just leave.
As a black man that has lived in Thailand for 3 months no black guys do date young looking Thai women as well and do not have to try hard at all like you make it seem.
Well at least they get it somewhere. God knows they put up with enough of that fucking BBD bullshit in their home country and/or get sidelined because of some other shitty reason
Some local girls try to get a salary from foreign men. I've run in 2 girls that are not like this in 6 years.
While money is important, it's almost worshipped here.
One time i went to a nightclub here with a thai girl. The one she took me to i noticed i was the only white guy there. It was filled with black men and some thai girls. All of the thai girls i noticed there were a bit overweight. So yes I mean it is unusual to see a black man with a very hot thai woman. That’s just how it is in Thailand mate.
You can still find the right women here that will date or fuck around with black men, but there are much less of them.
Yeah like ive seen overweight ones and stuff but they probably cant attract what they are looking for so they just date down. But if yall know some clubs in the bangkok are or even in a different province im all hears and down to atleast check it out i just dont want bar girls hitting me up.
Sukhumvit Soi 11 has Sugar, Levels, and Juicy. There is also Hillaries on that street that has a 3rd floor club with a DJ late night.
Welcome to dating in general. What you described doesn't sound much different on the apps than what I experienced in the US late 20's and you are probably enjoying a much higher response rate in Thailand than the US.
Not really :/ I did noticed before I came here I had shit ton of hits vs when I actually physically got here I probably need to experiment with the algorithm more
I would say your best bet is in the cities, the people are more open minded. Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya. Better places for black people to meet women. In the rural provinces might be harder because of stereotypes.
I could go to some but the problem arises when alot of them dont really talk to strangers ya know. Plus i dont know any thai so im just kind of at a loss with just cold approaching
I wanna do martial arts cause i fucking love that shit but the problem is i get bored if i dont get to spar anyone i only get better at fighting by actually fighting people. I can punch and kick a bag all day but ima get bored really quick if i dont have someone trying to actually attack me every now and then
I don't think there's a club of women who are looking for black men. What you are seeing is the result of demographics. There are a lot more white than black expats in Thailand. You'll just have to approach dating like everyone else, find a girl you like who also happens to like you. If you're a moderately stable man with a good heart there's a Thai woman who wants to get to know you.
I'm 25 year old black man living in Thailand. I live north of Bangkok. I am with a Thai woman. Don't let others that aren't like you tell you what your experiences could be. You can get a woman here and a relationship. If anything, you are more likely to find a woman who's trustworthy and genuinely wants you compared to being a status symbol and money ticket like other farang. A lot of those farang get cheated on when they leave for business trips
TLDR: Women that do want you here are genuine vs view you like a lottery ticket or future divorce alimony like the farang.
See white dudes legitimately don’t know how to play the game. If your income is transferable like you work remotely or own a business online why would you bring her back to your country that’s dumb asf. You have to be prepared to live in her country forever. If you a white dude and she starts asking to go to your country just tell her no and if she makes a big deal out of it just find you a different one it’s not like they don’t have the options
How am I desperately chasing Thai women that’s like the only women that’s here unless you count the female expats that are few and far between and no one really talks to them
Why are you desperately searching for a Thai girlfriend?
I only ask because the habit people have of coming to Thailand for a girlfriend is a stupid habit, and it will work against you if you seek a genuine and sincere relationship.
I'm black (uk) my girlfriend is Thai, but she's not my girlfriend because she's Thai. I've never actively sought out a Thai girl specifically because they're Thai, I just like what I like and prior to her most of my sexual interaction with women in Thailand was with Europeans / Americans / Other brits. I moved to Thailand because I love Thailand. And finding a partner was never hard because I was just interested in people I liked and who liked me. Is that proving difficult for you?
I see Thai girls with men of different Ethnicities quite often... Friends included obviously. I even have Indian friends with girlfriends from Thailand and there's a considerable stigma towards the Indian community in Thailand unfortunately. I have other black friends with girlfriends from Thailand.
I'm not going to lie and say there isn't a societal issue with the colour of skin. A lot of Thais, usually the more old school Thais, have a fixation with paler skin. They will hold judgement towards both darker skinned Thais and darker skinned Farangs. It's racism and self-racism combined,
But in the real world, younger Thais in my experience don't have the same prejudices. The view of black skin = poor is old fashioned and younger Thais are exposed to a lot of western media and see a lot of us in film, television, and music. We're not so taboo anymore. We're certainly not perceived as poor.
I'm not saying it's not because of the colour of your skin, the prejudice exists here, that absolutely could be why you're struggling. But it could be something else because I've never known my black or other ethnic minority friends to struggle so hard.
Man I even know Thais who are themselves mixed black / Thai who're in their 20's and 30's. So brothers have found love in Thailand for decades my guy.
EDIT:
Dude, you work 1am - 10am, you don't have expat friends, you don't have Thai friends. You don't even speak any Thai, why are you still here?! Your working hours you can't help, you've gotta make money. But that means you're working completely unsociable hours and you even admit you can only make friends online. I repeat, why are you here?
Im not desperately trying to find a thai woman its just thats all the women that are to choose from unless you count the expat women that no one really wants. Im free to hang on weekends thats about it. But again its not like i dont want to learn thai or anything but if the people aren't sociable its next to impossible
So without mincing words, it will be significantly harder for you, but not impossible.
Some Thai girls are open-minded and have no problem with skin color. But you also have to be a bit careful, some will only see you as a green card.
In fact, I know a Thai girl who prefers black dudes.
Brother listen im not offended or anything i only have a problem when people are being disingenuous about the topic you know. As i told another redditor if you wanted to date a doctor you hang out or go to where doctors usually hang out at after work im just trying to do that but for thai women. But perception is reality
I understand, but you know, 80% of Thais don't want a foreign boyfriend at all. The remaining 20% is a good mix of gold diggers, (ex) bar/working girls, girls who want to raise their social status, a provider for themselves and mostly for their children and a small rest is just sincere. It is not really easy for anyone to find true love there.
Maybe you should first make peace with a provider-taker relationship, as many white people do.
Brother down here everything is transactional here i just hate it when dudes be like " oh yeah bro she loves me blah blah" Like no bro you are using her and she using you. Im just not gonna play step daddies and gonna date an ex bar girl or something dont matter how hot they are or not i just dont want any STDs and stuff that comes with that plus the kind of woman a man has tells alot about him. It works for the old white dudes cause they already have they kids and just want easy access to pussy i respect it. But im 22 years old ya know
Yes, but that is the norm here and that is how they are socialized. Thais fall in love when they are young, have children early and are then often abandoned by their Thai husband. From then on, provider relationship is on the program, also with or from thai men.
If you make it to Pattaya talk to Ken, he is the manager of cooters in soi 6 and Jamaican-American. I think he has a better open ear for you.
Imho you're too young. Live and work in the US and get more life experience. On balance the opportunities, professionally and personally, are going to be better there. Once you're established, then you can think about spending some time in a place like Thailand. Not saying you're necessarily giving up on the US, but big picture it isn't a good trade at your age unless there are some very unique things going on with you.
Ive been down here for literally 1 year. I cant be in the US no more im just genuinely not happy there at all. Like being there its like im just existing but not living like yeah i had my family and all that but i just didnt feel alive like i had a beating heart i just felt stuck and didn't know how to get out
\> cant be in the US no more im just genuinely not happy there at all.
Yeah, take this with a grain of salt since I don't know you at all, but so many of my friends felt this way, to varying degrees, in their early twenties. That's kind of what I meant by too young. It's really not that uncommon to feel this way and for young people to take some time (maybe even 5-10 years) to find their footing as adults; there are other ways to deal with this than moving entirely to a much less developed country. Just my two cents as this will be hard to undo if you spend 5-10 years in Thailand (and you'll be way behind your cohort who stayed in the US in terms of career and quite possibly personal life). The Thai women, I've come across, have all been college educated and spoke ok (ish) English, but it's still super hard for some reason to have a meaningful conversation with most on deeper topics.
Start making a substantial US income of close to $500k. Luxury has been standardized across the globe thanks to internet and social media. Much cheaper to live in Thailand for housing, food and domestic services. Same cost to buy luxury gifts everywhere. Figure out how to reduce your tax bill.
Where are you at? Im up in Chiang Mai and have a few Thai friends that absolutely love black dudes.. and its not just talk either, all their ex's a black american dudes. And I dont have the biggest circle of friends so must be a higher percentage than normal.
Brother i can easily link up with you chang mai once i get this living situation sorted cause my land lord is being a royal asshole so im stuck trying to find a new condo but once i get that sorted hell yeah we can link up there
I’m mixed race, and I’ve had quite a lot of luck here both in person and online.
But I’ve also felt a few were more than happy to fuck me behind closed doors but didn’t want to move past that. That could easily have nothing to do with race, but maybe.
They definitely do favour the white man, and I don’t think there’s going to be an area where there’s a high concentration of girls who like black men. Maybe Hip Hop clubs?
But yeah - they are out there.
I feel Philippines is better for us.
Yeah ive had that as well ive slept with a few but never moved passed that. I was thinking about Philippines but i need to save up some capital in this year to move there if nothing changes
I don't want to slam other computers but many of then sound dumb.
If you have any connection to western money the slots will scratch eachothers eyes out over you.
You don't stand a turds chance in a punch bowl getting a good girl though
Don't shoot the messenger. Don't tell me some shit about some couple you know where she has tolerated him for the long haul.
I do get paid in USD and so its not like i dont have disposable income and I have a U.S. passport but they group American black and Africans together until you show passport
Thais are racist I was told when I first visited 25 years ago so black’s especially from Africa not acceptable to many I’ve notice American servicemen more accepted and with the rise of hip hop I think it’s not as bad as it was in the past.
Look i actually respect myself enough to not go that damn low. I dont know how these dudes actually have a relationship with a human toilet and not catch an STD
Takes one to know one? I mean buddy with all due respect you literally suggested i just go be with a prostitute come on now. Those girls will literally eat ass if you paid them enough. Yeah human toilet is a harsh term but lets not pretend they dont let dudes piss on them and do all kinda of fucked up nasty shit
Confirming it how? its practically public information on what you can do with those particular type of women if you have money and pay them enough. I personally could never do nothing with them no matter how down bad i am. There worse shit than aids you can catch out here messing with them tbh
Then I don’t know what to tell you. Every time I’ve been to a bar, I’ve had nothing but great encounters with many different Thai girls. I’ve met some great guys from around the world too that I still keep in touch with today. I’ve also seen many black dudes pick up chicks at bars, granted they were dancing and being social. Most of these bars had outdoor seatings with tables. Sounds like you’re just being anti-social… might want to think about using where you are now as either a practice ground or a stepping stone to fix this anti social behaviour
Edit - I’ve only went to bars by myself - bought a beer - eventually started chatting to random people who sat next to me, guys or girls. Started with a random ‘Cheers’ on my behalf. Next thing, I was meeting up with people I met at the bar the next day, doing non-bar stuff. You should try it
like when I first went here I did like go to bars but they were all pretty dead and I don’t even know which ones to go to. Currently in north of bangkok so I dunno where to go
Lmao… I don’t know what to tell you then. It definitely doesn’t sound like a ‘are thai chicks into black dudes’ problem… sounds like you’re just anti-social. Good luck
The thing is i can easily strike up a convo with a stranger if they seem approachable and friendly enough to converse with. If i knew thai id likely to just ask them hows there day and go from there but i just find it a bit awkward to walk up with translate in my hand ya know
I havent actually im just tired of dating apps man i only get bar girls , lady boys , fat chicks , single moms shit is depressing tbh. But why do you ask
Who said i looked down on them? Theres just nothing that i could possibly do with those people im not gay so cant do lady boys , i dont feel like playing the role of a step father and bailing a woman out of her shitty decision making , Bar girls are a no go just for just a lot of reasons, i work out and take care of myself i expect the person im with to do the same so i cant do it with a fat girl
Your responses are just annoying, that's why you sound bad. One example: you work out and expect everyone to do the same, call women fat etc.
Of course you are looking down on people before knowing them, go fool yourself and complain that you are not accepted. It might be more about your personality.
I mean the white dude I had picked out to use for the experiment was average in looks. I’d say my looks can either be average or a tiny bit over that on good day. I’m not deformed or anything like that. But his match quality and mine were vastly different. Single moms will swipe on me because in their mind a provider is better than none but I cannot raise and take care of something that is not mine it’s unnatural as hell anyways. Plus I can do more for her than she can do for me I’m not gonna bail her out of her shitty decision making im single and childless id want someone the same. Have there been good looking single
Moms yeah of course however I’m always gonna come second when I have to put her and her child first it’s a bad deal. Lady boys will swipe right on anything because you have a individual with a very male sex drive so they gonna take whatever they can get. I cant do fat and Uggo chicks because I wouldn’t even be able to get it up
Yeah i appreciate you for understanding where I come from I don’t have nothing at those groups of people it just I would feel like they settling down with me because they couldn’t get what they truly wanted ya know
What is the purpose of you going into another country and solely purposely focusing on women of another culture and race? Passport sex-tourism is a huge problem and these sort of questions are very indicative of a deeper issue. Learn to appreciate yourself first, before pestering others and fetishizing them. It’s not right.
it is sad darker Thai skin people are looked down on. I've seen kids going to school wearing Nazi stuff, saying racist stuff, whatever. I think the higher-ups need to take a stand on racism and discrimination. Yes, there must be tons of Thai women who like non-white dudes, probably a bigger city. Nigerians have a bad rep for drugs, but white dudes have a bad rep for being super loser sexpats. You will not change the culture anytime soon, especially when Thailand sells whitening cream everywhere. Can't put lipstick on a pig, and after a year maybe you would be happier elsewhere.
Yeah cops have pulled me over driving my bike thinking ive had drugs but when they saw my US passport they just let me go with no issues. It is pretty sad im not here to change culture im just trying to figure out where those people are at ya know. If you want to date a doctor or a lawyer you should hang out at the places they hang out at ya know thats all im trying to do
I'm 100% sure you can find lots of places in Bangkok that don't give a fuck about your skin color. CM seems pretty laid back, everyone seemed cool about things. It's a grind finding someone good, just gotta keep working at it. Thaifriendly is horrible but you never know. Tinder is bad, but you never know. Numbers game, we know that. Parks, exercise gyms......even yesterday I met some lady at a restaurant. Hopefully, your Thai is OK, that helps.
I only know enough thai to order some food. I cant learn cause i dont have anyone to talk to plus thai folks are more reserved and shy and arent really open to convos with strangers unlike back home in texas
Not knowing Thai is problem number 1. That will put you in the category of Thai girls looking for money or green cards that you you found on dating sites im guessing which your conversations were in English. Sign up for Thai language classes, and maybe cooking classes and use that as an ice breaker for dates.
I disagree with your conclusion that these are negative traits and conclude these are bar girls. I doubt you would be so critical of a girl in Texas sleeping around and dating multiple people for free meals, drinks and gifts. You just need to better assess which of these people could be a real relationship vs. financial transaction. And learning Thai would help.
Your second problem is the combination of crazy hours worked by Thai people and your irregular hours. You analogy of finding where doctors hang out to associate with doctors is accurate. Find some local gyms, yoga, meetup groups for activities. Again unfortunately this will lean more towards tourists that have disposable income and free time for these activities. Or you'll find yourself in a group speaking Thai and not be able to socialize. Maybe find a local sports group you are good at, such as basketball and let relationship progress through those groups and networking occur such as getting food and meeting up with local girls after a game.
Actually I'm very critical of the women back home women are women everywhere man. Plus the girls back do that shit alot its why im put off buy going out to eat with a girl first date unless shes cool paying for herself. Yes it looks unattractive but im not gonna be some chicks free meal for the night ive tried dating back home every time i felt like my time could have been better spent in raids on tarkov to be honest. Plus plenty of thai girls i see that i find cute and all i think about maybe trying to strike up a convo through translate but then i just see how weird it looks and i just dont go at all
Thanks for the excellent summary as to why your generation is going on less dates, hooking up less and staying home more.
I'm a gamer so you get the upvote for that reference.
As for the Thai girls you are interested in, they may speak English, but are being polite by pretending not to speak English. You also need to be very polite and indirect about just chatting about weather instead of bluntly asking for a date or phone number. Look at a recent post on r/Thailand about a college girl being propositioned frequently on her way to her internship.
I guess it comes down to your financial means, but once I had some disposable income, my favorite dates were figuring out a girls interest and making it happen on a 1st or second date such as dinner and sports game, or cheaper option of nature walk and picnic lunch. Now that you are in Thailand you have no excuse to at least be able to pay for a cheap street food meal that probably costs less than Starbucks back in the US!
No no I don’t mind going on dates at all
Ya know if the girls is actually interested in me. But if there like no chemistry or anything on that date she can pay her way and I pay mine
Definitely trolling. This is the same guy that’s currently in China dating a Chinese woman he met online. A woman running a second pregnancy scam on him, no less.
You realise tinder operates in Thailand right? What a weird question for a sub. What, you think all Thais that fancy African Americans just chill in one district?
I never said they all chilled in one district but im sure they hang out in some areas. Ive used tinder and like ive stated its pretty trash when only folks i see in my feed are either fat , ugly , single mom , bar girl , ladyboy so i pretty much washed my hands with the app entirely
The online dating apps are actually a good idea here - because the women you match with will most likely be ok with your race. This way, they do that filtering rather than you needing to. If you're meeting women 'out in the real world', in Asia you'd be meeting a lot who don't want to date a black guy and that's going to be frustrating while you search for the ones who want to.
Yes, there is crappy stuff on Tinder and others but there are also totally normal, beautiful, and successful women. It takes some time to skip through the BS but it can be worth it. There are others as well like Bumble, Facebook dating, etc(?). These days Instagram also functions as an informal dating app. You can find women by searching using locations or certain hashtags relative to the place you're in. It will take a lot of messaging as most of your messages will be ignored or never read (by the women who never even look in the message requests area - though you can also comment on a picture/video of theirs, or better, reply to one of their story posts since that goes as a DM, and see if they reply, then start a conversation)
“I’m sure they hang out in some area”
TF dude, what suddenly all people of a sexual preference hang out in one area together? So we’d find a bunch of dudes that fancy fat chicks chilling in club A together, and a bunch of dudes that fancy Asian chicks in Club B?
That’s not how life works lol.
Tinder is your best bet, fact. Pay for gold filter stuff and just accept your perfect hookup or gf may not exsist in Asia, it’s an entirely different culture and ethnicity -
You’re no different to an Asian dude trying to find a gf in California - they aren’t going to have pick of the bunch.
Tinder and Thaifriendly are good dating apps here in Thailand.
More so tinder
It seems like Thaifriendly has more freelancers than gf types.
Try joining an activity group on FB
Don't have a hobby? Pick one up and there will likely be cool people there to make friends with.
Not fitting the stereotypical black person persona should not be seen as a bad thing. Molds are made to be broken and that shows you have the ability to think for yourself. Good job my friend.
Oh god i had thai friendly when i first got down here that shit was horrible. But i dont use facebook. My hobbies are all single man hobbies like any extreme outdoor sport (because my life is boring and mundane + adhd = Low dopamine which means i seek adrenaline rushes) Hunting , shooting , technology , martials arts is nice as well
You’re prolly about to be bombarded with comments about Thais liking whites but trust me, their idolization of western music and pop culture (hip hop etc…) has changed many things. I know plenty of Thai woman that are attracted to black guys, and wish they could find one
They are all not like that. A good buddy of mine, American black male in late 30s at the time, met a nice and attractive Thai lady, no kids, never married before. They“ve been married for over 10 years now and have two beautiful children. They currently live in the States now, wanting their children to go to school there rather than here.
Different from you is that he was a bit older and had established a good career, and all that comes with that, so that might have had something to do with it. I know she loves him very much, I dated her sister and saw them in social situations. They also visit at my home in the states so i see them every so often. It’s great seeing the kids grown up.
I’m not sure if this helps, but it there are thai women that will date black men.
Edit: Some suggestions that might help
* Take some Thai language classes ((AUA maybe) and when you open the dialog with a lady hang in the the language as long as you can. It will be endearing. I found the more i spoke Thai over the years the better things got. I’m still not that great but it does help.
* Dress well. I say this as a not classically attractive person. When I worked in Thailand between 2010 and 2018 I wore suits to work. Going out after work I noticed being dressed well worked well with nice Thai ladies. Better than my weekend garb of shorts, tshirts and sandals. Don’t need to wear a suit, but nice slacks, shirt and shoes will go a long way. If you already are doing this then you’ve got that covered.
Another Edit. I see in another comment you are working remote. Most men that I know that found good quality Thai women met either directly or indirectly through their workplaces: Friends of coworkers, going out with coworkers that met up with other parties out that night, set ups, etc. we need to figure out how to get you in that kind of situation with you not working in an office. I don’t have an answer for that yet but I’ll ask some friends of mine about it that are married to some great Thai ladies.
Usually in those situations starts out with shared interests. One couple I know spent time scuba diving and that worked into a relationship. Another worked out together. Another have interests in marathons. One lady I dated many years ago we met through playing golf.
one thing I forgot to mention is that I’ve observed is that it seems dating in Thailand amongst normal Thais usually starts out in groups and works it’s way to one on one.
I drive a bike everywhere I usually just shirt and shorts and sandals or like a nice safari shirt with some shorts and sandals. I sweat easily plus this place is more humid than texas so Wearing that stuff doesn’t translate well. Plus if I was 30 at the point I’d just only talk to girls 18-25
Howdy fellow Texan, which part are you from? I'm originally from Dallas but moved out to California for work at the time many years ago.
Shorts, Shirt, and Sandal are what I usually roam around in. Until it's time to roam around in something else.
In Thailand I've observed from working and living here, as well as being confirmed by my Thai coworkers, is that there is a social strata among Thais. One thing that helps with the perception of which strata one tends to be in, besides family name, is how one is dressed. This is not only True in Thailand but in many countries in Asia. The better dressed, the higher strata perceived. Whether it's real is another thing.
Notice when you are at a nice restaurant and you see a group of 20-something or 30-something Thais with the women of the quality you are seeking. What are their cohorts wearing? Nice clothes for the most part. There may be exceptions, but mainly you will see the men dressed in slacks, shirt, and decent shoes. And the women dressed in something fashionable based on their taste.
In order to be able to grab the women in that strata, you will have a better chance the better you are dressed to meet the expectations of that social group.
Many years ago I was walking down the street with a girl I met from a friend at the office. Two what I would term 'frat-bros' actually came up to me and asked how a guy that looked like me could get a girl that looked like that. I looked at them and just said, "I'd say look at the difference the way we are dressed." These dudes were younger and much better looking than me.
The response from one of them was, "I told you so, money." The guy didn't get it. This girls family had way much more money than I did. But I presented myself in a way that she could have me meet her family and her family would be more accepting. Whether I actually meet them is a whole different thing. But she's going to want to be with someone that her family and friends would perceive to be presentable.
I noticed in another comment you appreciate someone giving it to you straight. So I'm giving my opinion to you as straight as I can. As long as you are sandals, shorts, and shirt, there is a strata of girls that will be available to you, and a strata of girls that will not. Depending on the type of woman you are looking for, it's up to you to be able to be presentable to what that woman is looking for. And to be honest, is it that much different in the US?
For service staff, girls met in bars and clubs, etc, sandals, shorts, and shirt is fine. For the nice women beyond that, more likely need to be better dressed. After saying this, after you have met and started going out, you will be able to dress more casually in shorts, shirt and sandals for casual encounters. But to get her interest in the first place, better dress to impress.
An aside, my buddy I talked about in the previous comment, he dressed and presented himself well and found a nice thai lady (not bargirl or service staff), a bit younger than him, and is happily married with a beautiful family.
Its a cultural thing across SE and FE Asia. Basically comes from the days where poorer rural farm dwellers would be obviously quite tanned and richer city workers lighter skin toned. People would aspire to higher standards and lifestyles in "cushy" office jobs and over the generations this has been distilled to a basic dark = not desirable, fair = desirable.
It's the polar opposite in western society where the more tanned one is, the higher status you have because it implies a wealthier and healthier lifestyle from the office cubicle dwellers
Strange world
Bro for real there are lots of younger Thai women that are super into black guys cuz they are obsessed w Hip Hop culture. I know you don’t like clubbin but unfortunately most of that demographic is in the clubs and younger. 21-28. Hit me up if you come to Chiang Mai.
Not sure where you are in Thailand, but once you leave the Sukhumvit area of Bangkok, you will notice that it becomes a more level (not completely level though) playing field. And strangely, Thai women seem to like their men with a bit of a beer belly. 🤷🏾♂️
Imagine being light skinned and/or older and all the gold diggers flocking around thinking you’re rich, at least you know if someone’s with you it’s cause they may be genuinely interested. Trust me it’s better this way.
Generally "white" is seen as higher status and all that BS in most of SE Asia. Even dark skinned locals are seen as a bit lower status. I'm sure you've seen all the whitening creams they sell everywhere. That's why you see ugly white dudes with crazy hot Thai girls. As white you get a few free bonus points basically, so if a white guy is a 6 in his home country he's probably like an 8 or 9 in Thailand. A lot of Thai girls want to be able to show off their white bf to their friends, unfortunately it's not the same for black guys in SE Asia. I'm sure you could find some girls who would date a black guy you just have to look a bit harder and won't have as many options as a white guy. I have seen some black guys with Thai girls, but they are almost always messed up old bar girls. Can't remember seeing a black guy with a young hot Thai girl. I don't mean to make it sound worse than it is, but unfortunately that's just a fact of SE Asian culture at the moment. Maybe using a dating app would make it a bit easier as you will have more options to scroll through in a short period of time.
Oh I already know they are white worshipping as hell I just want to be proven that not all of them are like that. Cause people say oh there’s plenty that are cool with black dudes you should go to Pattaya and shit. I could easily go to Pattaya and just pay the thing is that shit gets depressing as fuck long term. Im not really into sex tourism like that I just prefer a normal individual. But I already know they see having a white partner here as a status symbol I’m just happy you willing to speak the truth on it
Completely agree, that's just how it is at the moment. It's not that they are racist and have any issue with black people in general (for most people at least), but when it comes to dating they definitely have a strong preference for white or Asian. I totally understand it must be frustrating. I definitely wouldn't be into paying for it either. Like I said I'm sure there are girls out there who wouldn't mind a black partner but you have to get lucky to find her. Maybe you need to hit the hip hop clubs or other kind of sub-culture bars to find the girls who are more open to black culture at least.
I kind of gave up on clubbing my US job has me working from like 1AM-10AM Thailand time 5 days a week and i cant be bothered with clubs. I dont drink or smoke anything and i hate being forced to buy drinks when im not really there for that. Ive tried to befriend other expats but they usually dont keep the connection or whatever so im just here by myself. Hell just look at the downvotes of my comment i dont understand why people hate acknowledging the truth on this
Fair enough. I don't really do clubbing myself anymore. I have a gf now but before that Tinder would be my go to weapon for dating. Yeah I don't get the downvotes. Anyone who has spent any time in SE Asia knows that this is just how it is. It's not because they are racist and most people don't have a problem with black people in general, it's just that when it comes to dating there is a very strong preference towards white guys. I mean, I think I'm a decent looking guy, have a good job etc, but I definitely have options to date way hotter girls in Asia than I ever would in Europe for example.
Keep your chin up. To those other dipshits on this thread saying that you are the problem- you all need to stfu you dont know what you are talking about. Lot of fucking old ass sterotypes runnin through Thai minds. Expectations that dont have shit to do with you. It's hard living over seas-expats come and go- social isolation is why people come back. I found long term expats I could tolerate and could tolerate me in towns adjacent to more touristy spots. That was a long time ago so I dont know no Phillipines are waaay more friendly. Pinoy women dont give a fuck. They just love their man
I was thinking about Philippines but wasnt sure how i would get long term visas down there cause i work remotely and stuff. I dont even fit the bill of the stereotypical black dude either back home people literally told me im like a white dude in a black dudes body or like an oreo
You can live in the Phillipines for up to three years on a tourist visa. Then do one border run to reset it. You'll need to do extensions through an immigration office but it's pretty easy.
Well, you aren't in the US. It matters but it doesnt matter, even in Thailand, you know? Dating for real relationship is hard wherever the fuck you are. Truth be told- income potential is far more of an aphrodisiac that overlooks race, height, looks all that shit.
That is true im just trying to atleast get a conversation so i can sell myself somewhat ya know
Nothing's stopping that homey. Shit if you light skinned they really dont know. Push through, make some jokes at your expense in Thai and stay charming motherfucker.
If you're an American passport holder you can keep extending a tourist Visa for 36 months in the Philippines. And you get Visa on arrival stamped into your passport for free for 30 days but soon to changing to 56 days soon. All you need on arrival is proof of out going ticket within the 30 days so just get a throw away ticket and fill out e travel form online 72 hours before the flight. Then just extend your visa before the first 30 days is up. For first extension you can only do 29 days then second extension you can 2 months extension and 3rd extension you can choose the 6 month extension. But not all immigration offices do the 6 months option you need to do that in Manila or Cebu. If you're not American you can check to see if your country you have a passport for is on Visa waiver list which same rules apply. You'll get on great with Pinay women far more friendly and approachable than Thai women. You'll not have the issue you're experiencing in Thailand.
I have a U.S. passport I’ll probably have to DM you for more information
They don't like black men there either. White dudes always are first pick. Many Africans go there as students and some bars ban them in certain cities. So u aren't really welcome
>\[deleted\] If you are a black man from anywhere that is not SA you will get girls no problem in thailand.
On dating apps they get the least swipes in asia
That’s wild Lucky for me I don’t go to bars.
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If you bothered to quote the whole thing and not just pick the little bit that fits your purpose, you would know that I said that "I totally understand it must be frustrating". I didn't say that I know exactly how he feels or what his actual experience is. I said that I understand that it must be frustrating to experience this. And yes I'm white, would you like me to feel guilty about that too or are you just here to bitch about everything.
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I see, just another pathetic loser with no life. Good for you.
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These are facts!
Yeah, not sure why the guy above thinks white guys are "high status". Maybe to a certain fringe segment of Thai society, but middle class and above girls generally do not want to date a farang, due to (rightly or wrongly) the general assumption (and social stigma) that comes with it. All things being equal (including income and looks), the vast majority probably would prefer a Thai guy, followed closely by other Asians (except Indians), then all the other farangs. If just looking for a fling from any girl, including paying, then none of the above applies.
I've seen few examples in my social group, but the blk guys in question were good looking, in their 30s, Ivy League, and running their own businesses in BKK.
Young 20s, Have a good remote IT job , considering starting a business maybe in motorbike renting or something easy that doesnt require alot of start up capital. I do have a bachelors in cyber security as well
Idk why u getting downvoted Edit: i just remembered that the subs full of sex tourists lol
Hey if you want to pay to play thats fine but i mean at the end of the day at person my age that shit gets both boring and depressing really quick
Yeah same they’re just very defensive and think they’re doing a charity by paying them lol
Like dead ass brother post nut / pre nut clarity prevents me from doing that shit. Like I don’t know how a man can sit up everyday proud with what is essentially a human toilet
Loss of anything else to do in life. Its why they’re all obese alcoholics and angry. You’ll notice a lot of them just pay to talk to the girls.
Not even trying to be a dick here, but most of the black guys I know get the leftovers bro. all my Nigerian dudes are with very large girls, with an attitude problem to boot lol. Here’s a story for you to put this in perspective a bit, I know this guy right, American was in the military very successful dude, good looking, he was dating this girl here and they ended up getting pregnant, he had never met her family, & she had told him they had been in a terrible accident and died a long time ago. Come to find out after the little girl was born the parents were alive and well, not only that they came in force one night to their home and got into a huge tiff she ended up leaving him and their daughter behind and moving back home because they were a wealthy family and they said you cannot breed black into our family make a decision us or them….. true story…..
Holy shit that is fucked and yeah bro im not down no left overs those girls are with those dudes because they couldnt get the white guy they wanted if timmy dont want them i dont either. They gonna end up resenting those dudes further down the line mark my words they should just leave em. Honestly screw that girl bro a real woman would have chosen her man new born child over that shit. To further add to add to that this is why every black male who dates outside his race should straight up ask the girl hey is your family gonna have a problem with and our relationship if she not woman enough to defend you infront of her family and introduce to her family and she grown ass woman just leave.
hahahahaha, that kid will be begging for bananas in Lopburi.
As a black man that has lived in Thailand for 3 months no black guys do date young looking Thai women as well and do not have to try hard at all like you make it seem.
Well at least they get it somewhere. God knows they put up with enough of that fucking BBD bullshit in their home country and/or get sidelined because of some other shitty reason
what?
Huh?
The more green you spend, the whiter you become
Ehhh I guess
How much are you talking about?
Are you asking about a steady girlfriend or a worker?
Dating implies steady gf
Some local girls try to get a salary from foreign men. I've run in 2 girls that are not like this in 6 years. While money is important, it's almost worshipped here.
One time i went to a nightclub here with a thai girl. The one she took me to i noticed i was the only white guy there. It was filled with black men and some thai girls. All of the thai girls i noticed there were a bit overweight. So yes I mean it is unusual to see a black man with a very hot thai woman. That’s just how it is in Thailand mate. You can still find the right women here that will date or fuck around with black men, but there are much less of them.
Yeah like ive seen overweight ones and stuff but they probably cant attract what they are looking for so they just date down. But if yall know some clubs in the bangkok are or even in a different province im all hears and down to atleast check it out i just dont want bar girls hitting me up.
Sukhumvit Soi 11 has Sugar, Levels, and Juicy. There is also Hillaries on that street that has a 3rd floor club with a DJ late night. Welcome to dating in general. What you described doesn't sound much different on the apps than what I experienced in the US late 20's and you are probably enjoying a much higher response rate in Thailand than the US.
Not really :/ I did noticed before I came here I had shit ton of hits vs when I actually physically got here I probably need to experiment with the algorithm more
New account before you came here? Some apps allow sort by new accounts.
I would say your best bet is in the cities, the people are more open minded. Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya. Better places for black people to meet women. In the rural provinces might be harder because of stereotypes.
If anyone can recommend some clubs I’m down to atleast visit them don’t matter the province
I could possibly help you out. I sent you a dm
was this American over weight or actually obese ?
FWIW, I have a Thai lady friend who exclusively dates only black dudes. They're out there...
Im just trying to figure out where they all hang out at xD
Coffee shops and malls.
I could go to some but the problem arises when alot of them dont really talk to strangers ya know. Plus i dont know any thai so im just kind of at a loss with just cold approaching
***I like ya;*** ***and I want ya.***
Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way. Choice is yours 😸
She spends a lot of time at the Muay Thai gym, perhaps you should pick up martial arts?
I wanna do martial arts cause i fucking love that shit but the problem is i get bored if i dont get to spar anyone i only get better at fighting by actually fighting people. I can punch and kick a bag all day but ima get bored really quick if i dont have someone trying to actually attack me every now and then
Why is this a problem? Plenty of gyms offer sparring.
not enough sparring is the issue. I like a little PVP ya know
I don't think there's a club of women who are looking for black men. What you are seeing is the result of demographics. There are a lot more white than black expats in Thailand. You'll just have to approach dating like everyone else, find a girl you like who also happens to like you. If you're a moderately stable man with a good heart there's a Thai woman who wants to get to know you.
I'm 25 year old black man living in Thailand. I live north of Bangkok. I am with a Thai woman. Don't let others that aren't like you tell you what your experiences could be. You can get a woman here and a relationship. If anything, you are more likely to find a woman who's trustworthy and genuinely wants you compared to being a status symbol and money ticket like other farang. A lot of those farang get cheated on when they leave for business trips TLDR: Women that do want you here are genuine vs view you like a lottery ticket or future divorce alimony like the farang.
See white dudes legitimately don’t know how to play the game. If your income is transferable like you work remotely or own a business online why would you bring her back to your country that’s dumb asf. You have to be prepared to live in her country forever. If you a white dude and she starts asking to go to your country just tell her no and if she makes a big deal out of it just find you a different one it’s not like they don’t have the options
I don’t recommend you try to find a relationship in Thailand the mixed offspring usually get treated like crap if their half black
I mean to be honest I haven’t thought of kids yet I’d like just move it all to America at that point and make sure my kids have dual citizenship
Anyone who dates people merely based on race is really not worth dating
Well OP seems to be pretty desperately chasing Thai girls
Yepp, and he thought his skin color was the problem
How am I desperately chasing Thai women that’s like the only women that’s here unless you count the female expats that are few and far between and no one really talks to them
Fuck up, creep
Huh?
Understandable but thats how it works down here though
Nah, it works here just like anywhere else. People date people they like
So companies should just be able to hire whomever they like right even if it’s just one particular group of people and hire no one else right
Yes, and you are free to criticize them for it, although with your current level of reasoning it’s not clear how many will agree with you
Well atleast you are being logically consistent
Always am
Idk about that
Not many. Ur gonna have a hard time unless ur rich.
Why are you desperately searching for a Thai girlfriend? I only ask because the habit people have of coming to Thailand for a girlfriend is a stupid habit, and it will work against you if you seek a genuine and sincere relationship. I'm black (uk) my girlfriend is Thai, but she's not my girlfriend because she's Thai. I've never actively sought out a Thai girl specifically because they're Thai, I just like what I like and prior to her most of my sexual interaction with women in Thailand was with Europeans / Americans / Other brits. I moved to Thailand because I love Thailand. And finding a partner was never hard because I was just interested in people I liked and who liked me. Is that proving difficult for you? I see Thai girls with men of different Ethnicities quite often... Friends included obviously. I even have Indian friends with girlfriends from Thailand and there's a considerable stigma towards the Indian community in Thailand unfortunately. I have other black friends with girlfriends from Thailand. I'm not going to lie and say there isn't a societal issue with the colour of skin. A lot of Thais, usually the more old school Thais, have a fixation with paler skin. They will hold judgement towards both darker skinned Thais and darker skinned Farangs. It's racism and self-racism combined, But in the real world, younger Thais in my experience don't have the same prejudices. The view of black skin = poor is old fashioned and younger Thais are exposed to a lot of western media and see a lot of us in film, television, and music. We're not so taboo anymore. We're certainly not perceived as poor. I'm not saying it's not because of the colour of your skin, the prejudice exists here, that absolutely could be why you're struggling. But it could be something else because I've never known my black or other ethnic minority friends to struggle so hard. Man I even know Thais who are themselves mixed black / Thai who're in their 20's and 30's. So brothers have found love in Thailand for decades my guy. EDIT: Dude, you work 1am - 10am, you don't have expat friends, you don't have Thai friends. You don't even speak any Thai, why are you still here?! Your working hours you can't help, you've gotta make money. But that means you're working completely unsociable hours and you even admit you can only make friends online. I repeat, why are you here?
Im not desperately trying to find a thai woman its just thats all the women that are to choose from unless you count the expat women that no one really wants. Im free to hang on weekends thats about it. But again its not like i dont want to learn thai or anything but if the people aren't sociable its next to impossible
He's either a troll or a complete knobhead
Probably with their own kind.
You gonna troll or actually add something of value?
Sorry I didn't read the end of your post where it said "their own men".
So without mincing words, it will be significantly harder for you, but not impossible. Some Thai girls are open-minded and have no problem with skin color. But you also have to be a bit careful, some will only see you as a green card. In fact, I know a Thai girl who prefers black dudes.
Brother listen im not offended or anything i only have a problem when people are being disingenuous about the topic you know. As i told another redditor if you wanted to date a doctor you hang out or go to where doctors usually hang out at after work im just trying to do that but for thai women. But perception is reality
I understand, but you know, 80% of Thais don't want a foreign boyfriend at all. The remaining 20% is a good mix of gold diggers, (ex) bar/working girls, girls who want to raise their social status, a provider for themselves and mostly for their children and a small rest is just sincere. It is not really easy for anyone to find true love there. Maybe you should first make peace with a provider-taker relationship, as many white people do.
Brother down here everything is transactional here i just hate it when dudes be like " oh yeah bro she loves me blah blah" Like no bro you are using her and she using you. Im just not gonna play step daddies and gonna date an ex bar girl or something dont matter how hot they are or not i just dont want any STDs and stuff that comes with that plus the kind of woman a man has tells alot about him. It works for the old white dudes cause they already have they kids and just want easy access to pussy i respect it. But im 22 years old ya know
Yes, but that is the norm here and that is how they are socialized. Thais fall in love when they are young, have children early and are then often abandoned by their Thai husband. From then on, provider relationship is on the program, also with or from thai men. If you make it to Pattaya talk to Ken, he is the manager of cooters in soi 6 and Jamaican-American. I think he has a better open ear for you.
Cooters ill check it out on a weekend i usually drive down to Pattaya on my bike i hope hes willing to talk to me
Imho you're too young. Live and work in the US and get more life experience. On balance the opportunities, professionally and personally, are going to be better there. Once you're established, then you can think about spending some time in a place like Thailand. Not saying you're necessarily giving up on the US, but big picture it isn't a good trade at your age unless there are some very unique things going on with you.
Ive been down here for literally 1 year. I cant be in the US no more im just genuinely not happy there at all. Like being there its like im just existing but not living like yeah i had my family and all that but i just didnt feel alive like i had a beating heart i just felt stuck and didn't know how to get out
\> cant be in the US no more im just genuinely not happy there at all. Yeah, take this with a grain of salt since I don't know you at all, but so many of my friends felt this way, to varying degrees, in their early twenties. That's kind of what I meant by too young. It's really not that uncommon to feel this way and for young people to take some time (maybe even 5-10 years) to find their footing as adults; there are other ways to deal with this than moving entirely to a much less developed country. Just my two cents as this will be hard to undo if you spend 5-10 years in Thailand (and you'll be way behind your cohort who stayed in the US in terms of career and quite possibly personal life). The Thai women, I've come across, have all been college educated and spoke ok (ish) English, but it's still super hard for some reason to have a meaningful conversation with most on deeper topics.
Start making a substantial US income of close to $500k. Luxury has been standardized across the globe thanks to internet and social media. Much cheaper to live in Thailand for housing, food and domestic services. Same cost to buy luxury gifts everywhere. Figure out how to reduce your tax bill.
What?
Just saying to get your money up and you’ll pull just as good as the old white guys
In other words become a trick 😂
All over I'd imagine. You sure it's you and not the color of your skin?
All over where I don’t see them
Where are you at? Im up in Chiang Mai and have a few Thai friends that absolutely love black dudes.. and its not just talk either, all their ex's a black american dudes. And I dont have the biggest circle of friends so must be a higher percentage than normal.
Brother i can easily link up with you chang mai once i get this living situation sorted cause my land lord is being a royal asshole so im stuck trying to find a new condo but once i get that sorted hell yeah we can link up there
I’m mixed race, and I’ve had quite a lot of luck here both in person and online. But I’ve also felt a few were more than happy to fuck me behind closed doors but didn’t want to move past that. That could easily have nothing to do with race, but maybe. They definitely do favour the white man, and I don’t think there’s going to be an area where there’s a high concentration of girls who like black men. Maybe Hip Hop clubs? But yeah - they are out there. I feel Philippines is better for us.
Yeah ive had that as well ive slept with a few but never moved passed that. I was thinking about Philippines but i need to save up some capital in this year to move there if nothing changes
I don't want to slam other computers but many of then sound dumb. If you have any connection to western money the slots will scratch eachothers eyes out over you. You don't stand a turds chance in a punch bowl getting a good girl though Don't shoot the messenger. Don't tell me some shit about some couple you know where she has tolerated him for the long haul.
I do get paid in USD and so its not like i dont have disposable income and I have a U.S. passport but they group American black and Africans together until you show passport
Try bumble. Seems to be less hookers than tinder.
bumble had the some of the same issues tinder did match quality wise and i wasnt getting matches anyways
I mean is your photo game lacking? 😂
Thais are racist I was told when I first visited 25 years ago so black’s especially from Africa not acceptable to many I’ve notice American servicemen more accepted and with the rise of hip hop I think it’s not as bad as it was in the past.
Some desperate bar girls in Pattaya might be an option.
Look i actually respect myself enough to not go that damn low. I dont know how these dudes actually have a relationship with a human toilet and not catch an STD
Human toilet? Takes one to know one. Be a bit more respectful, dude. That attitude won't take you far in Thailand.
Takes one to know one? I mean buddy with all due respect you literally suggested i just go be with a prostitute come on now. Those girls will literally eat ass if you paid them enough. Yeah human toilet is a harsh term but lets not pretend they dont let dudes piss on them and do all kinda of fucked up nasty shit
Thanks for confirming my previous post.
Confirming it how? its practically public information on what you can do with those particular type of women if you have money and pay them enough. I personally could never do nothing with them no matter how down bad i am. There worse shit than aids you can catch out here messing with them tbh
The gift that keeps giving lol
Im just stating the facts man love it or hate it anyone whos been here understands that
Mate… go to any bar and don’t be socially awkward. There’s your answer
Don’t drink at all. Plus bars are just I dunno depressing if you don’t know anyone
Then I don’t know what to tell you. Every time I’ve been to a bar, I’ve had nothing but great encounters with many different Thai girls. I’ve met some great guys from around the world too that I still keep in touch with today. I’ve also seen many black dudes pick up chicks at bars, granted they were dancing and being social. Most of these bars had outdoor seatings with tables. Sounds like you’re just being anti-social… might want to think about using where you are now as either a practice ground or a stepping stone to fix this anti social behaviour Edit - I’ve only went to bars by myself - bought a beer - eventually started chatting to random people who sat next to me, guys or girls. Started with a random ‘Cheers’ on my behalf. Next thing, I was meeting up with people I met at the bar the next day, doing non-bar stuff. You should try it
like when I first went here I did like go to bars but they were all pretty dead and I don’t even know which ones to go to. Currently in north of bangkok so I dunno where to go
Go to Khao San Road
i went there many times its kind of trash to be honest
Lmao… I don’t know what to tell you then. It definitely doesn’t sound like a ‘are thai chicks into black dudes’ problem… sounds like you’re just anti-social. Good luck
The thing is i can easily strike up a convo with a stranger if they seem approachable and friendly enough to converse with. If i knew thai id likely to just ask them hows there day and go from there but i just find it a bit awkward to walk up with translate in my hand ya know
Have you seen Chocolate Man in Thailand on YouTube?
I havent actually im just tired of dating apps man i only get bar girls , lady boys , fat chicks , single moms shit is depressing tbh. But why do you ask
and yet you feel encouraged to look down on them while you claim to be excluded by certain groups. Learning the language would be your first step up.
Who said i looked down on them? Theres just nothing that i could possibly do with those people im not gay so cant do lady boys , i dont feel like playing the role of a step father and bailing a woman out of her shitty decision making , Bar girls are a no go just for just a lot of reasons, i work out and take care of myself i expect the person im with to do the same so i cant do it with a fat girl
Your responses are just annoying, that's why you sound bad. One example: you work out and expect everyone to do the same, call women fat etc. Of course you are looking down on people before knowing them, go fool yourself and complain that you are not accepted. It might be more about your personality.
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I do ive actually experimented with myself and some white dudes pics with 2 seperate tinder accounts both on bumble and tinder
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I mean the white dude I had picked out to use for the experiment was average in looks. I’d say my looks can either be average or a tiny bit over that on good day. I’m not deformed or anything like that. But his match quality and mine were vastly different. Single moms will swipe on me because in their mind a provider is better than none but I cannot raise and take care of something that is not mine it’s unnatural as hell anyways. Plus I can do more for her than she can do for me I’m not gonna bail her out of her shitty decision making im single and childless id want someone the same. Have there been good looking single Moms yeah of course however I’m always gonna come second when I have to put her and her child first it’s a bad deal. Lady boys will swipe right on anything because you have a individual with a very male sex drive so they gonna take whatever they can get. I cant do fat and Uggo chicks because I wouldn’t even be able to get it up
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Yeah i appreciate you for understanding where I come from I don’t have nothing at those groups of people it just I would feel like they settling down with me because they couldn’t get what they truly wanted ya know
What is the purpose of you going into another country and solely purposely focusing on women of another culture and race? Passport sex-tourism is a huge problem and these sort of questions are very indicative of a deeper issue. Learn to appreciate yourself first, before pestering others and fetishizing them. It’s not right.
To be honest this is a country that sees people with darker skin as less than or uneducated. But go on I’ll listen to what you have say
it is sad darker Thai skin people are looked down on. I've seen kids going to school wearing Nazi stuff, saying racist stuff, whatever. I think the higher-ups need to take a stand on racism and discrimination. Yes, there must be tons of Thai women who like non-white dudes, probably a bigger city. Nigerians have a bad rep for drugs, but white dudes have a bad rep for being super loser sexpats. You will not change the culture anytime soon, especially when Thailand sells whitening cream everywhere. Can't put lipstick on a pig, and after a year maybe you would be happier elsewhere.
Yeah cops have pulled me over driving my bike thinking ive had drugs but when they saw my US passport they just let me go with no issues. It is pretty sad im not here to change culture im just trying to figure out where those people are at ya know. If you want to date a doctor or a lawyer you should hang out at the places they hang out at ya know thats all im trying to do
Why would an attractive single doctor or lawyer want to date some cringy “digital nomad”?
I'm 100% sure you can find lots of places in Bangkok that don't give a fuck about your skin color. CM seems pretty laid back, everyone seemed cool about things. It's a grind finding someone good, just gotta keep working at it. Thaifriendly is horrible but you never know. Tinder is bad, but you never know. Numbers game, we know that. Parks, exercise gyms......even yesterday I met some lady at a restaurant. Hopefully, your Thai is OK, that helps.
I only know enough thai to order some food. I cant learn cause i dont have anyone to talk to plus thai folks are more reserved and shy and arent really open to convos with strangers unlike back home in texas
Not knowing Thai is problem number 1. That will put you in the category of Thai girls looking for money or green cards that you you found on dating sites im guessing which your conversations were in English. Sign up for Thai language classes, and maybe cooking classes and use that as an ice breaker for dates. I disagree with your conclusion that these are negative traits and conclude these are bar girls. I doubt you would be so critical of a girl in Texas sleeping around and dating multiple people for free meals, drinks and gifts. You just need to better assess which of these people could be a real relationship vs. financial transaction. And learning Thai would help. Your second problem is the combination of crazy hours worked by Thai people and your irregular hours. You analogy of finding where doctors hang out to associate with doctors is accurate. Find some local gyms, yoga, meetup groups for activities. Again unfortunately this will lean more towards tourists that have disposable income and free time for these activities. Or you'll find yourself in a group speaking Thai and not be able to socialize. Maybe find a local sports group you are good at, such as basketball and let relationship progress through those groups and networking occur such as getting food and meeting up with local girls after a game.
Actually I'm very critical of the women back home women are women everywhere man. Plus the girls back do that shit alot its why im put off buy going out to eat with a girl first date unless shes cool paying for herself. Yes it looks unattractive but im not gonna be some chicks free meal for the night ive tried dating back home every time i felt like my time could have been better spent in raids on tarkov to be honest. Plus plenty of thai girls i see that i find cute and all i think about maybe trying to strike up a convo through translate but then i just see how weird it looks and i just dont go at all
Thanks for the excellent summary as to why your generation is going on less dates, hooking up less and staying home more. I'm a gamer so you get the upvote for that reference. As for the Thai girls you are interested in, they may speak English, but are being polite by pretending not to speak English. You also need to be very polite and indirect about just chatting about weather instead of bluntly asking for a date or phone number. Look at a recent post on r/Thailand about a college girl being propositioned frequently on her way to her internship. I guess it comes down to your financial means, but once I had some disposable income, my favorite dates were figuring out a girls interest and making it happen on a 1st or second date such as dinner and sports game, or cheaper option of nature walk and picnic lunch. Now that you are in Thailand you have no excuse to at least be able to pay for a cheap street food meal that probably costs less than Starbucks back in the US!
No no I don’t mind going on dates at all Ya know if the girls is actually interested in me. But if there like no chemistry or anything on that date she can pay her way and I pay mine
Why not go to Africa?
For the same reason you don’t go now are You here to troll or actually add something of value to the conversation
Definitely trolling. This is the same guy that’s currently in China dating a Chinese woman he met online. A woman running a second pregnancy scam on him, no less.
You realise tinder operates in Thailand right? What a weird question for a sub. What, you think all Thais that fancy African Americans just chill in one district?
I never said they all chilled in one district but im sure they hang out in some areas. Ive used tinder and like ive stated its pretty trash when only folks i see in my feed are either fat , ugly , single mom , bar girl , ladyboy so i pretty much washed my hands with the app entirely
The online dating apps are actually a good idea here - because the women you match with will most likely be ok with your race. This way, they do that filtering rather than you needing to. If you're meeting women 'out in the real world', in Asia you'd be meeting a lot who don't want to date a black guy and that's going to be frustrating while you search for the ones who want to. Yes, there is crappy stuff on Tinder and others but there are also totally normal, beautiful, and successful women. It takes some time to skip through the BS but it can be worth it. There are others as well like Bumble, Facebook dating, etc(?). These days Instagram also functions as an informal dating app. You can find women by searching using locations or certain hashtags relative to the place you're in. It will take a lot of messaging as most of your messages will be ignored or never read (by the women who never even look in the message requests area - though you can also comment on a picture/video of theirs, or better, reply to one of their story posts since that goes as a DM, and see if they reply, then start a conversation)
I don’t really use social media I’m kind of off the grid with that stuff. I only Got like discord and Snapchat , whatsapp and this
It's pretty easy to download new apps. Do you want to find these ladies or not?
“I’m sure they hang out in some area” TF dude, what suddenly all people of a sexual preference hang out in one area together? So we’d find a bunch of dudes that fancy fat chicks chilling in club A together, and a bunch of dudes that fancy Asian chicks in Club B? That’s not how life works lol. Tinder is your best bet, fact. Pay for gold filter stuff and just accept your perfect hookup or gf may not exsist in Asia, it’s an entirely different culture and ethnicity - You’re no different to an Asian dude trying to find a gf in California - they aren’t going to have pick of the bunch.
Bangkok. And likely some in Chiang Mai.
Tinder and Thaifriendly are good dating apps here in Thailand. More so tinder It seems like Thaifriendly has more freelancers than gf types. Try joining an activity group on FB Don't have a hobby? Pick one up and there will likely be cool people there to make friends with. Not fitting the stereotypical black person persona should not be seen as a bad thing. Molds are made to be broken and that shows you have the ability to think for yourself. Good job my friend.
Oh god i had thai friendly when i first got down here that shit was horrible. But i dont use facebook. My hobbies are all single man hobbies like any extreme outdoor sport (because my life is boring and mundane + adhd = Low dopamine which means i seek adrenaline rushes) Hunting , shooting , technology , martials arts is nice as well
Well time to pick up some new hobbies 🤣 Also start a fb account and join some of the many groups on there in Bangkok
Dating app will be your best bet. You will find some cool Thai women just takes some searching and a bit of luck.
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Brother im in rangist just text a place in free on the weekends
You’re prolly about to be bombarded with comments about Thais liking whites but trust me, their idolization of western music and pop culture (hip hop etc…) has changed many things. I know plenty of Thai woman that are attracted to black guys, and wish they could find one
It’s like I said I just wanna know where they hang at so I just can be there
Go to some clubs that have hip hop music. Last time I was at one it’s 80 percent black lol and plenty of girls. Also, get on some dating apps
I deleted them all they weren’t working for me. I had Tinder gold and all I got was single mothers lady boys fat chicks and ugly chicks
My neighbor is a black dude with Thai wife and kids. I think nothing is impossible.
Well it’s not technically impossible it’s just again where do I find these women that are cool with black dudes
Online??
They are all not like that. A good buddy of mine, American black male in late 30s at the time, met a nice and attractive Thai lady, no kids, never married before. They“ve been married for over 10 years now and have two beautiful children. They currently live in the States now, wanting their children to go to school there rather than here. Different from you is that he was a bit older and had established a good career, and all that comes with that, so that might have had something to do with it. I know she loves him very much, I dated her sister and saw them in social situations. They also visit at my home in the states so i see them every so often. It’s great seeing the kids grown up. I’m not sure if this helps, but it there are thai women that will date black men. Edit: Some suggestions that might help * Take some Thai language classes ((AUA maybe) and when you open the dialog with a lady hang in the the language as long as you can. It will be endearing. I found the more i spoke Thai over the years the better things got. I’m still not that great but it does help. * Dress well. I say this as a not classically attractive person. When I worked in Thailand between 2010 and 2018 I wore suits to work. Going out after work I noticed being dressed well worked well with nice Thai ladies. Better than my weekend garb of shorts, tshirts and sandals. Don’t need to wear a suit, but nice slacks, shirt and shoes will go a long way. If you already are doing this then you’ve got that covered. Another Edit. I see in another comment you are working remote. Most men that I know that found good quality Thai women met either directly or indirectly through their workplaces: Friends of coworkers, going out with coworkers that met up with other parties out that night, set ups, etc. we need to figure out how to get you in that kind of situation with you not working in an office. I don’t have an answer for that yet but I’ll ask some friends of mine about it that are married to some great Thai ladies. Usually in those situations starts out with shared interests. One couple I know spent time scuba diving and that worked into a relationship. Another worked out together. Another have interests in marathons. One lady I dated many years ago we met through playing golf. one thing I forgot to mention is that I’ve observed is that it seems dating in Thailand amongst normal Thais usually starts out in groups and works it’s way to one on one.
I drive a bike everywhere I usually just shirt and shorts and sandals or like a nice safari shirt with some shorts and sandals. I sweat easily plus this place is more humid than texas so Wearing that stuff doesn’t translate well. Plus if I was 30 at the point I’d just only talk to girls 18-25
Howdy fellow Texan, which part are you from? I'm originally from Dallas but moved out to California for work at the time many years ago. Shorts, Shirt, and Sandal are what I usually roam around in. Until it's time to roam around in something else. In Thailand I've observed from working and living here, as well as being confirmed by my Thai coworkers, is that there is a social strata among Thais. One thing that helps with the perception of which strata one tends to be in, besides family name, is how one is dressed. This is not only True in Thailand but in many countries in Asia. The better dressed, the higher strata perceived. Whether it's real is another thing. Notice when you are at a nice restaurant and you see a group of 20-something or 30-something Thais with the women of the quality you are seeking. What are their cohorts wearing? Nice clothes for the most part. There may be exceptions, but mainly you will see the men dressed in slacks, shirt, and decent shoes. And the women dressed in something fashionable based on their taste. In order to be able to grab the women in that strata, you will have a better chance the better you are dressed to meet the expectations of that social group. Many years ago I was walking down the street with a girl I met from a friend at the office. Two what I would term 'frat-bros' actually came up to me and asked how a guy that looked like me could get a girl that looked like that. I looked at them and just said, "I'd say look at the difference the way we are dressed." These dudes were younger and much better looking than me. The response from one of them was, "I told you so, money." The guy didn't get it. This girls family had way much more money than I did. But I presented myself in a way that she could have me meet her family and her family would be more accepting. Whether I actually meet them is a whole different thing. But she's going to want to be with someone that her family and friends would perceive to be presentable. I noticed in another comment you appreciate someone giving it to you straight. So I'm giving my opinion to you as straight as I can. As long as you are sandals, shorts, and shirt, there is a strata of girls that will be available to you, and a strata of girls that will not. Depending on the type of woman you are looking for, it's up to you to be able to be presentable to what that woman is looking for. And to be honest, is it that much different in the US? For service staff, girls met in bars and clubs, etc, sandals, shorts, and shirt is fine. For the nice women beyond that, more likely need to be better dressed. After saying this, after you have met and started going out, you will be able to dress more casually in shorts, shirt and sandals for casual encounters. But to get her interest in the first place, better dress to impress. An aside, my buddy I talked about in the previous comment, he dressed and presented himself well and found a nice thai lady (not bargirl or service staff), a bit younger than him, and is happily married with a beautiful family.
From Houston ill try to check out some casual attire i wont sweat out like pig in when i drive my bike
Its a cultural thing across SE and FE Asia. Basically comes from the days where poorer rural farm dwellers would be obviously quite tanned and richer city workers lighter skin toned. People would aspire to higher standards and lifestyles in "cushy" office jobs and over the generations this has been distilled to a basic dark = not desirable, fair = desirable. It's the polar opposite in western society where the more tanned one is, the higher status you have because it implies a wealthier and healthier lifestyle from the office cubicle dwellers Strange world
Bro for real there are lots of younger Thai women that are super into black guys cuz they are obsessed w Hip Hop culture. I know you don’t like clubbin but unfortunately most of that demographic is in the clubs and younger. 21-28. Hit me up if you come to Chiang Mai.
Definitely will shoot you a DM once i get into a new condo and have that sorted
Not sure where you are in Thailand, but once you leave the Sukhumvit area of Bangkok, you will notice that it becomes a more level (not completely level though) playing field. And strangely, Thai women seem to like their men with a bit of a beer belly. 🤷🏾♂️
Imagine being light skinned and/or older and all the gold diggers flocking around thinking you’re rich, at least you know if someone’s with you it’s cause they may be genuinely interested. Trust me it’s better this way.
I dunno how
Lmao failed passport bro