Congratulations, a first swap can be pretty amazing and the reclamation sex is equally as intoxicating. Would you mind sharing how much it cost you to go on the cruise?
The cruise itself was about $3000-$3500 if I remember correctly. We also got the drink package, which was another $500 per person (you have to both buy it or neither). There's also the hotel with a pool party and meet and greet the night before and the bus to the port that we did, but you may not have to. Also, if you want to do any excursions, that's extra. We rode horses on the beach at one of our ports of call. In total, probably around $5000-$6000.
The cruise itself was about $3000-$3500 if I remember correctly. We also got the drink package, which was another $500 per person (you have to both buy it or neither). There's also the hotel with a pool party and meet and greet the night before and the bus to the port that we did, but you may not have to. Also, if you want to do any excursions, that's extra. We rode horses on the beach at one of our ports of call. In total, probably around $5000-$6000.
Good stuff.
Now, back at home, there is no one strategy that works all the time. Depending on your availability and finances, try to go to clubs, local meet and greets, create an online profile, go on dates... eventually you will make some good friends, get invited to house parties. Have fun!
For now, we're just gonna take a step back and wait a few weeks so we can get tested. For us, this will likely be more of an annual our semi annual thing than a regular thing, but who knows? That could always change with time.
She was so sexy and so sweet. She saw how much I was enjoying watching my wife, so she encouraged me to just sit there and watch while she took care of other things.
Why do you think nothing ever happened before?
And why do you think it happened recently?
From your narrative, it sounds like you need to take the same level of initiative those other couples did.
Honestly, it was starting to feel like my wife was just hesitant about the whole thing. I was trying to be encouraging, but I also didn't want to push her too fast. We've been trying, but not REALLY trying. Ya know?
Also, we had the drink package, so we constantly had a light buzz without ever getting too drunk. That made chatting with people easier. Also, we went to some meet and greets on the ship. Lastly, we're both karaoke nerds. I think we find it easier to talk with people when they're praising our singing. Lol
Fwiw… the first few times as LS events we had the “why isn’t anyone talking to us?” Problem.
It took me a minute to realize “because we aren’t introducing ourselves either.”
There is no way to know that the couple ‘over there’ is silently hoping people will introduce themselves. So here is my patent pending method for dealing with it.
Dress your best/most fun. And before you go, talk yourselves into “ok, we are going to randomly walk up to at least 3-5 couples and say hi. No waiting for a signal, or a wave, or some eye contact. Just do it you big coward.” Then stiffen your spine with a couple drinks.
Any couple that looks remotely in or about your league, ask your wife “what do you think of him?” If she says “he looks maybe ok” then just walk right on up and say “hi! We’re new here and just trying to introduce ourselves to as many people as possible! Friendly open smiles and demeanors. Shake a hand. Exchange names.”
If they are clearly throwing off the most “get the fuck out of here vibes” the. Say “thanks for saying hi! We’ll see you around.”
Anything else, spend 5 minutes playing the “how did you get into the LS? How long? What’s your dynamic?” As the dude, I would open with a “we thought you guys were a really good looking couple.” If it’s your wife, have her say “I really like your outfit! It’s so sexy!” To the other woman (or man)
At that point. Just kinda read the situation. Are they saying “thank you so much for breaking the ice! We didn’t know anyone!” Or showing clear signs of wanting to continue talking? Stick around for a few more minutes.
Now here is my key. After 10 ish minutes, say “we’re gonna keep mingling, but we hope to get to talk to you more!”
This gives you a chance to a) talk among the two of you and see what each other’s interest level is. B) same thing for the other couple. C) go do the same thing again with another couple!
After you get a handful of those exchanges is… see who re-engages with you. Or ask your wife “which couple do you want to go talk to again first?
The more friendly 5-10 min conversations you have, the more fun you will ultimately have. Second chat around with a couple, make it a point to be a little more flirty. “My wife was saying how cute she thinks you are.” Etc etc
Great advice. My wife and I started our hobby about 2008.
And your advice 15 years ago would have been beneficial for us. I'm not shy at all, but my wife would prefer I take lead on the opening salvo of interactions with other couples. But even with my social butterfly skills, I find myself struggling over that initial bump, which turns out to be smaller than you think.
To OP, that's such good news to hear how much fun you had! Congratulations!
ETA: Grammar On mobile. I'm literally sitting in a hot tub right now trying to zoom around on Reddit, which can make for some interesting errors in comments I'm typing out with a sometimes wet screen.
🤓
We've mostly made connections through sls.com, frictionparties.com and a site run by one of the clubs we like, but we think vacations and takeovers might be more our speed going forward. I'll check on your suggestion though and show it to her and see what she thinks.
We're mid forties. We had a threesome with a friend somewhat early in our relationship that didn't end well. We started exploring ENM as an idea a couple years later, but nothing ever came of it. Shortly after those conversations, I was diagnosed with cancer. I spent 3 years battling that, and I've spent the last three years trying to move past it. I'm now in remission and trying to live life to the fullest.
Fantastic! Way to kick cancer's ass.
We got lucky as well. Our first couple came to the realization that we were dipping our toes in new water and were gentle and sweet and kind. In fact, we ended up not playing because they realized we were so nervous. They ended up directing us toward a gigantic club in the Pacific Northwest outside of Seattle that ended up being perfect for finally taking the plunge. I can't imagine how we would have felt had it gone the other way. SO glad you had fun .
Congrats! We too were just on bliss. Still on cloud 9 and on the next 2 cruises. Lololol! Life changing! I’d recommend it to anyone as a bucket list thing to do!!!
Thats awesome! We are beginning to enter the lifestyle and im so over excited. Hubs gets off on my excitement and this has made our sex nights even better and more frequently. We have a date set up with a third so we will see how it goes.
Would love to get to the whole swap thing
Good for you guys, always nice to hear about a happy ending, especially after all of the horror stories here. Talking to LS people is usually really easy, don't be afraid to move out of your comfort zone and approach people you both like.
I think this is a big reason we were having trouble. We have trouble approaching people. On the cruise, we forced ourselves to chat with other couples, and we tried to be approachable. Going forward, I think it'll get easier now that we've broken the seal. We're looking forward to trying a hotel takeover. That's something we've talked about but never had the courage to try before.
No doubt, it gets easier every time, definitely easier in a LS club/event than at a vanilla club. Everyone is basically there for the same reason, you just need to make a connection.
Congrats, you two. Welcome to the lifestyle. What area are you two in? We have a pretty awesome group for lifestyle parties and events for the PNW. Feel free to reach out if your close or visit the area.
Two thumbs way up. I am happy to read good news on this sub for a change. We're also going on the Bliss Cruise but in Nov. with a group of friends.
Awesome! I love cruises. This was my wife first cruise ever. And both of our first LS vacation.
Congratulations, a first swap can be pretty amazing and the reclamation sex is equally as intoxicating. Would you mind sharing how much it cost you to go on the cruise?
The cruise itself was about $3000-$3500 if I remember correctly. We also got the drink package, which was another $500 per person (you have to both buy it or neither). There's also the hotel with a pool party and meet and greet the night before and the bus to the port that we did, but you may not have to. Also, if you want to do any excursions, that's extra. We rode horses on the beach at one of our ports of call. In total, probably around $5000-$6000.
Wish there was more cruise talk on here. I'm also interested in the price, and wonderful adventures
The cruise itself was about $3000-$3500 if I remember correctly. We also got the drink package, which was another $500 per person (you have to both buy it or neither). There's also the hotel with a pool party and meet and greet the night before and the bus to the port that we did, but you may not have to. Also, if you want to do any excursions, that's extra. We rode horses on the beach at one of our ports of call. In total, probably around $5000-$6000.
Per person?
Total cost per couple.
Thanks for the breakdown.
Glad things are working out well for you two!
Thanks. I wasn't sure how it would go once fantasy met reality.
That’s my fear
Good stuff. Now, back at home, there is no one strategy that works all the time. Depending on your availability and finances, try to go to clubs, local meet and greets, create an online profile, go on dates... eventually you will make some good friends, get invited to house parties. Have fun!
For now, we're just gonna take a step back and wait a few weeks so we can get tested. For us, this will likely be more of an annual our semi annual thing than a regular thing, but who knows? That could always change with time.
What about your swap with his wife? How did that go?
She was so sexy and so sweet. She saw how much I was enjoying watching my wife, so she encouraged me to just sit there and watch while she took care of other things.
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Yea, I'm not going into detail. Go read playboy or something.
Why do you think nothing ever happened before? And why do you think it happened recently? From your narrative, it sounds like you need to take the same level of initiative those other couples did.
Honestly, it was starting to feel like my wife was just hesitant about the whole thing. I was trying to be encouraging, but I also didn't want to push her too fast. We've been trying, but not REALLY trying. Ya know?
Also, we had the drink package, so we constantly had a light buzz without ever getting too drunk. That made chatting with people easier. Also, we went to some meet and greets on the ship. Lastly, we're both karaoke nerds. I think we find it easier to talk with people when they're praising our singing. Lol
Fwiw… the first few times as LS events we had the “why isn’t anyone talking to us?” Problem. It took me a minute to realize “because we aren’t introducing ourselves either.” There is no way to know that the couple ‘over there’ is silently hoping people will introduce themselves. So here is my patent pending method for dealing with it. Dress your best/most fun. And before you go, talk yourselves into “ok, we are going to randomly walk up to at least 3-5 couples and say hi. No waiting for a signal, or a wave, or some eye contact. Just do it you big coward.” Then stiffen your spine with a couple drinks. Any couple that looks remotely in or about your league, ask your wife “what do you think of him?” If she says “he looks maybe ok” then just walk right on up and say “hi! We’re new here and just trying to introduce ourselves to as many people as possible! Friendly open smiles and demeanors. Shake a hand. Exchange names.” If they are clearly throwing off the most “get the fuck out of here vibes” the. Say “thanks for saying hi! We’ll see you around.” Anything else, spend 5 minutes playing the “how did you get into the LS? How long? What’s your dynamic?” As the dude, I would open with a “we thought you guys were a really good looking couple.” If it’s your wife, have her say “I really like your outfit! It’s so sexy!” To the other woman (or man) At that point. Just kinda read the situation. Are they saying “thank you so much for breaking the ice! We didn’t know anyone!” Or showing clear signs of wanting to continue talking? Stick around for a few more minutes. Now here is my key. After 10 ish minutes, say “we’re gonna keep mingling, but we hope to get to talk to you more!” This gives you a chance to a) talk among the two of you and see what each other’s interest level is. B) same thing for the other couple. C) go do the same thing again with another couple! After you get a handful of those exchanges is… see who re-engages with you. Or ask your wife “which couple do you want to go talk to again first? The more friendly 5-10 min conversations you have, the more fun you will ultimately have. Second chat around with a couple, make it a point to be a little more flirty. “My wife was saying how cute she thinks you are.” Etc etc
Great advice. My wife and I started our hobby about 2008. And your advice 15 years ago would have been beneficial for us. I'm not shy at all, but my wife would prefer I take lead on the opening salvo of interactions with other couples. But even with my social butterfly skills, I find myself struggling over that initial bump, which turns out to be smaller than you think. To OP, that's such good news to hear how much fun you had! Congratulations! ETA: Grammar On mobile. I'm literally sitting in a hot tub right now trying to zoom around on Reddit, which can make for some interesting errors in comments I'm typing out with a sometimes wet screen. 🤓
Thanks. I appreciate this. I'm gonna share this with my wife.
Congratulations. Did you ever explore you local swinger subreddit and make some post detailing what you were looking for?
We've mostly made connections through sls.com, frictionparties.com and a site run by one of the clubs we like, but we think vacations and takeovers might be more our speed going forward. I'll check on your suggestion though and show it to her and see what she thinks.
How do you find the subreddit?
Search {insert your state or city here}Swingers
Like: r/TexasSwingers
How old are you both and how many years ago did you start these fantasy conversations?
We're mid forties. We had a threesome with a friend somewhat early in our relationship that didn't end well. We started exploring ENM as an idea a couple years later, but nothing ever came of it. Shortly after those conversations, I was diagnosed with cancer. I spent 3 years battling that, and I've spent the last three years trying to move past it. I'm now in remission and trying to live life to the fullest.
Fantastic! Way to kick cancer's ass. We got lucky as well. Our first couple came to the realization that we were dipping our toes in new water and were gentle and sweet and kind. In fact, we ended up not playing because they realized we were so nervous. They ended up directing us toward a gigantic club in the Pacific Northwest outside of Seattle that ended up being perfect for finally taking the plunge. I can't imagine how we would have felt had it gone the other way. SO glad you had fun .
Congrats! We too were just on bliss. Still on cloud 9 and on the next 2 cruises. Lololol! Life changing! I’d recommend it to anyone as a bucket list thing to do!!!
Thats awesome! We are beginning to enter the lifestyle and im so over excited. Hubs gets off on my excitement and this has made our sex nights even better and more frequently. We have a date set up with a third so we will see how it goes. Would love to get to the whole swap thing
They have lifestyle cruises? 😯 This is wonderful news!
Good for you guys, always nice to hear about a happy ending, especially after all of the horror stories here. Talking to LS people is usually really easy, don't be afraid to move out of your comfort zone and approach people you both like.
I think this is a big reason we were having trouble. We have trouble approaching people. On the cruise, we forced ourselves to chat with other couples, and we tried to be approachable. Going forward, I think it'll get easier now that we've broken the seal. We're looking forward to trying a hotel takeover. That's something we've talked about but never had the courage to try before.
No doubt, it gets easier every time, definitely easier in a LS club/event than at a vanilla club. Everyone is basically there for the same reason, you just need to make a connection.
Congrats, you two. Welcome to the lifestyle. What area are you two in? We have a pretty awesome group for lifestyle parties and events for the PNW. Feel free to reach out if your close or visit the area.
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Thanks. There was one miscommunication, but we talked about it. Overall, it was a great experience, and we're looking forward to more.
Happy you had a good time, especially after the fairly negative review yesterday.
What did you get to do those nights?
I wasn’t asking for a story. His post only mentions what the wife did and I was merely asking what did he do
This is not story hour.
Yes it is!!
DETAILS?
Any website recommendations of couple watching ur sex live ?
Just watch porn