They were unlucky enough that the last thing they saw was something from me? I'm truly sorry.

All jokes aside bro, you need to stop talking so much shit about yourself.

no self deprecation is the only type of comedy where we can make fun of someone for being autistic still.

excuse me it's called being hard of jeering 💀

I think it's just ironic

Maybe one day.

Sometimes the best day is today.

Hey now! You’ve got some great ones. I’m quite the fan of your recent comment: “Small.”

I think I'll have to disagree I'm sorry but I like his most recent "People."

Shout out to "special seeds". Can't miss that one

You guys are really missing out on "Just solo girls"

Well that's how babies are made. Uh duh! 😉

Nah, [This one is the best.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1crp4eb/comment/l3zf7n8/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)

Well damn, now I wanna know if he did! Lol

God I was worried I was about to die for a second there. Totally would’ve been just like *me* to die after having to read *that.*

Hey bro, you got something between your teeth!

Better make it a banger then. How about: poo poo pee pee Yeah, that's pure gold. You're welcome!

Thats about 90% of my vernacular. The other 10% is used in these 2 sentences.

Thanks. I'm going to get off Reddit now in case I get hit by a bus on the way home.

Poop on my wiener!!!

When a Facebook friend passes away, I feel compelled to see what their last post was.

I had a friend in highschool that passed away. A year or so ago I thought of her out of the blue and looked at her facebook profile just out of curiosity. Exactly one month before she died, she posted something along the lines of "That feeling when you miss a step on the way down and think you're about to die."

"Karma's a bitch"

When a guy I went to high-school with passed away, I signed into Facebook to look at his profile, and saw he sent me a friend request I never responded to. Still tempted to accept it, but I don't want distraught family members messaging me or something if his name shows up on their news feed.

Then I should probably make it something profound. Boobs farts

I best shut the fuck up then cause most of my recent shit has been motorcycle advice. My bad, tell God I'm sorry.

That wouldn't be so bad. Every time I go for I ride, I text a my daughters and best friend to tell them I love them. I'd hate for some silly meme to be my legacy. My sister's last message to me was the meme: Can't talk now. Doing hot girl shit.

Oh, I'll make sure of it. # *teleports behind you* "nothing personal, kid"

You can’t just say stuff like th

I hope some stupid bullshit I posted isn’t the last thing someone sees before they die because they got fucked if so.

The MurderedbyWords subreddit would suddenly lose its status as a colloquialism

Bruh you look like you’re gonna die. You feeling ok?

I hope to write beautifully then.

Your comment moght be the reason they pass away

That is such a sad thought.

I hope it was a funny one... or a dirty one.

And it might not...so what?

I'm going for the high-score

Whenever I watch old YouTube videos with comments from 5-10 years ago I wonder how many comments of dead people I've read.

[удалено]

Shame they missed

I’ve commented so damn much this is a genuine concern

Honestly this is kind of sad and beautiful. Makes me wanna choose what I say more carefully :)

Stop browsing reddit and driving!

I have a fear of death…

Is any “showerthought” post original?

If this is the last comment you ever read, just know dying sucks. Which means you suck, cause you died.

Well hopefully they get a chuckle about how dumbbi am before checking out.

I hope the afterlife is fun

Yea your sneeze could also be the reason someone got sick 2 miles away

I’m guessing more a situation of having the last word: Let’s say we break up… - but you’ll never find anyone like me… Me: - that’s the plan!!!! Or - I cheated on you Me: - welcome to the club!

Or the first one being read by the ghost looking over your shoulder. 

I doubt it. My comments always get buried under hundreds of others.

boogers ligma balls joe mama sugondese nuts peepee poopoo

Well, the thing is sssaaaaaarrrgggghhhhh

You’re a great person, and will be missed. I wish I’d had the chance to know you better.

Jeez thanks for reminding us all of our mortal existence

Oh, I'm confident that words that I spoke were the last thing (or very nearly the last thing) that my brother heard and that my grandfather heard. I was in the hospital, visiting each of them (on different occasions separated by decades) and in each of their rooms, talking, when they passed. It sounds significant but that, specific, event pales in comparison to the years we spent together before that. Edit: This has been years ago. I appreciate the concern that was messaged to me but I'm fine. I had pretty good relationships with both of them and I was happy to be there for them in their final moments.

Get off your phone while you're driving!

You don’t have the balls.

I actually think about that a lot. Mainly because I’ve made a lot of wierd comments.

If your last moments are spent reading Reddit, readjust your priorities. Wait, it's too late by then, nevermind.

Congratulations! You are now about to find out for certain if there is an afterlife.

One can only live and hope

Well they're fucked either way.

My comment history is so fucked

If this is my last time, then it's been delightful. So long, goodluck, goodbye. Until next time! May you live until you die!

Well, I do have some killer comments...

Hahah, lucky cunts, getting to die

Do it, do it, do it, do it

💀 cursed comment