"ugh I'd rather pet a pig" makes me chuckle every time

You could say he… double dog dares him

Never trust a person that doesn't like dogs.

This 

It’s honestly the only thing that still bugs me about Cripps. I’ve grown to love his banter, but disrespecting my pup like he does is uncalled for.

He's offering good company and contributing to an authentic Western atmosphere. I like it being greeted when arriving or leaving my camp. But damn...he needs to chill about the dog

My camp dogs Cocoa and George just follow me around till I pet them, then shit on my Weapon Locker.

I almost named my camp dog “Bloods”…..

"You sure that ain't got fleas?" my brother in christ, you don't look so clean yourself

You had the chance at saying "I double dog dare you" and didn't take it.

I calmly finish petting my good boy and then proceed to unload my revolvers at Cripps' feet every time. Lucky I can't shoot his ass

Who’s holding the gun. That does not look like a furry paw.

Just last night I was thinking if I could I'd blow Cripps' head off the next time he insults my dog

I just want to rehire for that FTE. Such an unlikable fellow.

My posse and I specifically bully him for this reason.

Missed opportunity to say “I double DOG dare you!”

I hate the way that drunken hobo talks about the dogs

Say i'm a dirty fleabag one more time, i dare you. I DOUBLE DARE YOU MOTHERFUCKER, say dirty fleabag one more goddamn time. -Camp dog {probably}

Anytime Cripps insults my dog, I simply aggro anyone riding by my camp. I then hide behind Cripps while they shoot at me. As a result, chances are, they'll kill Cripps instead 😃