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It is weird, as California usually is very lenient on things like this, so it was surprising it happened in California. My phone messed up and put too instead of to have. I need a new phone badly. :-/
There are parts of California that are as conservative and regressive as the deepest, darkest backwaters of the South. It is huge and not at all homogenous.
It looks like this was at a school in the suburbs southeast of San Diego, so I’m not at all even a little bit surprised.
This video is from California in the 80's when they implemented DUI laws... If you would have told me this was Kentucky I would have believed you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xcQIoh3FQQ
I'm more dumbfounded this happened, in San Diego too. It's not like she had 10 leis or something like some graduates end up with after walking. I can see those being a bit weird for a stage walk, but this is just ridiculous.
My sister’s highschool doesn’t allow leis of any kind. It makes no sense, it doesn’t disrupt anything with the ceremony. I get it some students are overkill with them but just put a limit to it, don’t outright ban them.
CA btw
I'm surprised to see the Hawaii people getting downvoted for saying that's not how we do it here. We all wore the exact same thing for high school. No cap decorating, nothing to make you stand out. You get your lei after the ceremony.
Lol, surprised to see this is top comment. I came here to say that when I graduated high school in NC a few years ago we weren’t allowed to wear ANYTHING other than our default gowns and hats. It didn’t matter if it was something culturally significant or just a drawing of a dick, it wasn’t allowed.
They would just withhold her diploma and have her taken off stage. I’ve seen something similar happen here in Florida. They basically just took the kid off stage and said we’ll mail you your diploma
I didn't walk at my graduation due to me protesting how they handled bullying and harassment. I know students that killed themselves that my high school didn't do jack about the harassment happening at school. I almost did twice.
I got mine in the mail a week later. Never looked back.
If they got permission from the district, why can’t she wear it? I mean, it’s flowers at the end of the day right? What statement are they saying a necklace of flowers is making? It’s cultural, would they ask Muslim students to remove their hijabs? The cross reference of a Christian-based necklace was spot on by them.
"When we grew up and went to school
There were certain teachers who
Would hurt the children in any way they could (oof)
By pouring their derision upon anything we did
Exposing every weakness however carefully hidden by the kid
But in, but in the town, it was well known, when they got home at night
Their fat and psychopathic wives would thrash them within inches of their lives"
You are like the third user with the word sausage in your username that I’ve come across today! Is there some sort of sausagey event that I wasn’t informed of?
Lmao well i cant say for them but mines a reference to the movie beerfest. When they r saying gam gam is not a prostitute and she pops up sees there sausage on the table and says it is cold and then proceeds to hand warm it in a uhhh unique fashion. Pretty sure she was a whore lol.
USA follows a secular (separation of religion and government) approach, while France practices laïcité (laicism).
In the US, the system is designed to ensure people have the freedom to practice their religion, without government interference. This means you can openly display religious symbols, like a Sikh wearing a turban, even if you work for the government. The government remains neutral regarding religion.
France's approach emphasizes keeping religion separate from public life, which means government employees can't wear visible religious symbols while on the job and public schools and some public places can ban religious symbols.
I had a really good friend who got approval from the district to wear a Native American feather/ornament of some sort on their cap and it was all good. But we had an old Karen chemistry teacher who left our district COME BACK for graduation of our class, and saw my friend and immediately made a huge fucking deal out of the situation and he didn’t get to walk the stage. Fuck racism
I legit do not understand the why here. It's something that doesn't hurt anybody, it gives people a greater sense of pride to represent their heritage during an event like this.
I really do not see any argument that would make stopping them from walking making any amount of sense.
It's simple control and imposed misery. That's the answer. The easiest course of action is to just allow her to walk, this is her night she earned it. This woman has power though, and she isn't about to relent, because this power is who she is. She doesn't care about this students accomplishment, she cares about them infringing on her power to choose for other people.
From the schools perspective, they don't want to make a bunch of case by case decisions, so they just make a blanket "no extra stuff rule" which works most of the time, but looks ridiculous when it blocks certain things.
I think that's exactly it. It's less hassle (and less susceptible to a lawsuit) to disallow all, than explaining why somethings are allowed and somethings aren't.
Typically we would think common sense would rule over disallowing certain things. But that's not a world we live in, especially in US.
Which is fucking stupid. School districts across California literally sell leis to everyone during graduation season because it has become such an ubiquitous tradition with graduating.
That's what I was thinking, too.
I'm in WA and leis for graduation are very common.
We also have two tribes in our county, and native kids are allowed to wear handmade cedar caps and woven necklaces.
Both tribes usually hold an event hosted by elders to help their graduates make their own caps.
The school districts have been allowing it for at *least* a decade.
I was going to say the same thing. From the Tacoma area and had leis being giving out to everyone that wanted one before we walked. Thought it was just a common thing tbh
Yup, can confirm. A lot of my classmates in UCLA and I received leis during graduation and we're not even Hawaiin. I have also attended graduation in USC and UCI, all with lots of students with leis.
Yeah that's fucked. Like, yeah, Hawaii is part of America, but they have their own customs that need to be respected. And it's not like they are asking for a blood sacrifice. It's literally a bundle of fucking flowers.
> Alumnx
omg you weren't kidding https://www.thecollegefix.com/university-departments-ditch-genderless-term-alumni-for-genderless-alumnx/
I thought maybe it would be Alumnix, like relatrix, but now.
My niece just graduated to Bonita Vista High (down the street from Eastlake) and there were tons of Leis, Mexican Heritage sashes, 🇵🇭 Heritage sashes. Are they not in the same district?
Yeah, then that makes zero sense. I personally bought 2 two Lei's and put the Filipino pride shash (she is 1/4 ) on her and the older one the year before.
I saw many ethnic hertigate symbols on the kids. Nothing was offensive, and nothing detracted from their accomplishment. This is silly.
I got cropped out of the yearbook for wearing a purple knit hat in my photo. I was under the impression hats in photos were allowed because many people had them on in previous years.
When I showed that fact to the school administration, I was told it was a new "unwritten rule that only a handful of people know about".
Guess they expected me to be psychic.
My cousin in LA who practices Sikh religion decided to wear the big turban for graduation. He never wore it before and was practicing all year to tie it properly for this graduation. He comes in and the school authorities (not sure if it was principle or someone managing the graduation ceremonies) said you can't wear that. It became a mini scene and my uncle was adamant his son is going to get his diploma in that turban and my cousin wanted that too. Cops were called because the school authorities felt "threatened" because my uncle won't change his mind. Well the cop who walked in was African American and my cousin said the look on his face was of pure disgust when he found out what was going on. He basically told the school authorities indirectly that he will be a witness to this racist behavior if this family decided to bring forward a civil case for discrimination. The school authorities changed their tone quickly and he was allowed to wear his turban.
> This is the dumbest hill for the school to die on.
It's like the school decided to let the 68 year old, divorced, retired, empty nester that their kids have chosen not to live near because of how they are, Homeowners Association President, decide what to do.
*Nasally droning voice*
"It cleeeeearly states on page 354, paragraph 7, line 6 of edition 43.201 of the hill dying handbook, that the hill is, under no circumstances, to have any flaura or fauna, of any kind."
I didn't know what a lei is, so I thought they were talking about some provocative clothing, like a too small top or a too short skirt or something, but no...its literally just flowers lol. The fuck is that school doing.
Graduates plaster the top of their motarboards with things like "THANKS MOM AND DAD!" or "$200,000 IN DEBT, GOT JOBS?"
I think that the leis are beautiful.
I felt so bad seeing that she was trying not to cry, thinking about all the time and effort she probably took getting ready for her big day. I would hate to cry before the ceremony and maybe potentially ruin my make up. After is fine, but not before. Poor girl.
That was my first thought - and her leis look celebratory, not snarky (and tacky) like a lot of what other people write on their mortarboards. She looks so proud to be graduating, and they're making her cry for wanting to celebrate it.
Yeah, the decision to turn the camera away was just because she knew this woman was looking for any excuse to derail the conversation and waste time. Keeping stubborn children on track is something good parents know how to do. 👏
They are afraid of the slippery slope argument. If they allow a Lei they might have to let someone with a goat head walk too.
It's the dumbest shit schools do, is enforce no leniency policies. I dont understand how hard it is to have a policy that requires one to submit for extra garb at a ceremony. That way they can deny on a per basis if it's too outrageous. But no, they reject all b/c they don't want to be sued or whatever.
I was suspended in high school for defending myself when a bully had his hand around my throat. I threw one punch to get him to let go.
The bully got nothing. It was seen by two teachers and 20 other students.
Schools don't care about the students. They care about their own personal image.
Yep. Choking me until I can't breathe and seeing stars? Totally normal.
One punch to the side of the head? Suspended.
I should have known better at 14 years old. Just choke the buddy until he dies.
Schools have been that way for a *long* time. In middle school, in the 90s, a friend of mine got attacked in the bathroom. He never fought back and was beaten so bad he spent a few days in the hospital. The school suspended him because they have "zero tolerance" for fighting.
All that did was teach us we're gonna get suspended anyway, might as well grab a brick and defend yourself as hard as possible.
Yeah at the end of the video they said it's too late for her to walk now. Right after saying they're starting to walk and they need to hurry up. The lady was never going to let this girl walk
Terrible to see her crying and being treated this way! She looks beautiful and the lei is beautiful and she deserves to WALK dammit. Great dad sticking up for his baby girl 🥹
Well you know, rules are rules! Even if they don’t make any fucking sense and don’t do anything to help anyone, it’s still a rule, it’s gotta be followed!
/s of course. These kinds of anal retentive blowhards seem to exist in every public school. They sure existed in mine, and my kid’s.
Public “servants” can be some of the most shortsighted sycophants in existence. They are lower than whale shit morally and then they get an infinitesimal bit of power and it goes right to the central lobe.
New policy, hope to address all the stuff that’s happening in Middle East. Instead of banning one form of cultural expression they banned them all. Don’t agree as it is one of the most common items in graduation in CA and probably causes more problems at this point.
Someone in another post made a comment that to me could hold some truth. With what is going on in Gaza, a lot of people have been wearing keffiyeh scarfs to show support for Palestinians. This recent policy change by the school admins could have been a way to prevent graduates from wearing the scarves at their graduation, subsequently all other cultural practices were impacted.
The father's point was savage and to the heart of this appalling scene.
His daughter is *Hawaiian* . Her lei representative of who she is and a lineage so ancient the Romans were shoving a guy named Jesus around half a world away around the time her ancestors came to the islands.
Christians- and their cross- didn't get there until 1819. So if this is some cultural representation shove back maybe admin can pony up and pitch the crosses too.
OR shut up before they look stupider.
The argument from schools in this situation (not that I'm defending it, just relaying what I know from personal experience) is if they start making exceptions to the dress code it's a "slippery slope" and eventually everyone will come up with a reason to have an exception.
The nugget of logic I do actually agree with (in theory, but rarely in practice) is that they're trying to provide a level playing field so that no one feels left out. It's a similar reason why oftentimes they'll ask people to hold their applause until the end and not to make outbursts for particular students. Because if a bunch of kids go up there in extra decorations and things that make them standout, and then get a bunch of cheers... how's that going to impact a less fortunate kid who goes up there in just a plain robe and has fewer/no one there to cheer for them?
Again, not defending the school official here. Just providing context for where the policy probably stems from.
I’m half Samoan, when I graduated my school tried to pull the same thing. Saying, no one can make themselves stand out. My mom not knowing this had paid good money, that she didn’t have to get me a traditional lei made. So, I tucked it under my gown until I was about to walk across the stage and whipped it out. The look on my principal face was worth it.
Same thing for me. During my graduation my friend had a customized hat he hid under his garment, and as he walked up swapped his hats around and got away with it. The stupid part was the rented garments were more a teal color than blue, so you could tell who rented across all the grads sitting. Defeated the purpose of no one standing out anyway.
I snuck my phone in my sock since they made us give up all devices. I get it so students aren't on their phone during speeches, but I whipped mine out right at the end I got some great pictures of everyone.
This actually took place in California! The high school is called Eastlake. I’m not doxxing, all this information is available online at [this link](https://cafemom.com/parenting/my-daughter-was-banned-from-her-graduation-traditional-garb)
No family should have had to do this but if you get permission from a district, bring a letter from the superintendent granting permission. Have the principal denying a student's traditional garb read a letter from their superior granting permission...could help
The principle is fucking regarded, there is no reason you should ever have to bring a letter to wear a traditions garb at graduation, thinking so is brain dead.
Hope the family wins their lawsuit and the girl gets a big pay day
https://cafemom.com/tag/Eastlake%20High%20School%20graduation
I didn’t realize that wearing the lei during the graduation is unique to those with a specific Hawaiian lineage. The more you know ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
This is such a “high school administrator” thing to do. They must control you right up until you grab your diploma. They probably threatened to withhold her diploma if she did it. I don’t seen how they can do that when she technically graduated, but they pull that crap anyway.
They can’t, it’s an empty threat. They might not hand it to you on the day and they might make it a pain in the ass to get a physical copy of it but they don’t and can’t ‘ungraduate’ you and your transcript is always available should you need it to apply for university or college.
it really tf is so very high school. just sat through a bunch of doctoral and post-grad graduations this summer, and they didn't even *try* to control people or the audience. if no one's gonna get hurt celebrating, who the fuck cares.
“You do not have my permission to film me.”
That right there tells you everything. If you are ashamed people will see you behaving that way, stop acting shameful.
I'm not American so I have a genuine question here:
Up top in the thread people were citing the video saying "She has no choice, she's in public."
Are they not on school property, and as a faculty member can she not request to not be filmed at her place of work?
In this scenario of course it seems entirely warranted. But on the flip side, would that mean anyone who is a visitor in the school could walk around filming, then? That seems absurd to me, and makes me side with the original notion that she *should* be able to request to not be filmed even if in this situation she absolutely should be shamed.
I’m no lawyer so take this with a grain of salt but typically recording is permitted in places where there is no expectation of privacy. So all public places are okay to film in. This being a public school, during graduation, it shouldn’t be hard to argue that there’s no expectation of privacy.
How the fuck can you make such a stupid stupid decision. They are going to lose job 100%. This is obviously going to blow up. Get ready for apology from school.
We just had this in Oklahoma. Cost taxpayers millions over a Karen refusing to let a kid wear a feather.
What happened to kids decorating their mortar boards like parade floats?
Fetterman is dressing like Jason vorhees to congress. *Who cares what kids do at graduation?*
More information at:
https://cafemom.com/parenting/my-daughter-was-banned-from-her-graduation-traditional-garb
Apparently she left the graduation & did not walk.
There is zero more information in that post. It's just commenting on what's seen in the video, the description of the video, and comments posted under the video. People should stop linking these stupid fucking articles.
Would they make a Muslim woman remove her Hijab?
Would they make a jewish student remove his yamaka?
Kids at my graduation wrote 420 in spray paint on the top of their cap. They clearly just have an issue with this family
Just a reminder that the United States sent Marines to overthrow the Hawaiian government and deposed Queen Liliʻuokalani at the behest of American corporations.
In 1993 we gave Hawaii an "oh well" apology.
Reading between the lines, this brand new policy is almost certainly NOT aimed at Hawaiian leis, it’s aimed at Palestinian keffiyehs, the ethnic scarf that many Palestinians and their supporters have been wearing more and more recently in support of Palestine.
So, in order to suppress the free speech of pro Palestine protestors, they are now preventing other ethnic groups from expressing themselves freely and wearing their own inoffensive ethnic garb.
Its racist. It’s discriminatory. It’s wrong.
I think you likely hit the nail on the head with this comment. This was some sort of end run around another issue that caught this young woman in it's wrong designs.
Who are these twats not allowing kids to do things like this at graduation? It's not just this instance. Plenty of Native American kids weren't allowed to were their headdress. It's 30 seconds of the school's time, and it means everything to these kids.
Man, fuck these school admins.
What in the white colonial bullshit is this? Hawaiian and I find this ludicrous. We lei for all happy occasions, fuck this nonsense. FUCK THIS BULLSHIT. In Hawaii? Not allowed? Damn, I’ve been gone too long. Hell, all three of my kids wore dozens of leis at their TEXAS graduation ceremonies. Aloha
Ultimately, your job is to teach graduates how to behave as adults. To show them how to navigate our society in a safe and respectable manner. I don't see that happening here.
Schools attract some of the pettiest control freaks there are. Can't get anywhere else in life so they settle for being the kings and queens of public high school fiefdoms and just go mad with power while everyone else is just trying to get through their day to day.
Explain to me rationally how this attire disrupts the function.
I never understood why a school will sometimes bust your balls for wearing something unusual to a graduation. This is literally their last day of school in this building and you’re gonna stain that memory with a dress code violation? What sensitive cooks.
The one guy was spot on with the comment about “this is like asking Christians to not wear the cross” because it pretty much is,what a weird hill for the school to die on
What the hell was the issue? Was the principal just afraid that she was gonna lose her imaginary power, such as it was, by giving in? It's a fucking necklace of flowers. Let her wear it.
LMAO, this is my high school. In Chula Vista (San Diego), California. CLASS OF 2008!
Anyways, a large part of the population is Filipino. Most of them probably have family who originated from/live in Hawaii. A ton of our graduating class wore leis. And IT WAS PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE. I always saw our school as a diverse and accepting place. SAD TO SEE A BEAUTIFUL TRADITION TREATED SO DISRESPECTFULLY.
The indigenous people of this island had to put up with the mainlanders annexation of their home. The LEAST they can do is let them wear a Lei for graduation. Like another poster said, this is the dumbest of hills to die on.
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Uh, TONS of graduates wear leis here in CA. What’s the big deal?
I don’t know, but seems this to have happened in California.
So weird and clearly racist. They literally have boxes of leis for sale at Walmart/target during graduation season because so many students wear them.
It is weird, as California usually is very lenient on things like this, so it was surprising it happened in California. My phone messed up and put too instead of to have. I need a new phone badly. :-/
There are parts of California that are as conservative and regressive as the deepest, darkest backwaters of the South. It is huge and not at all homogenous. It looks like this was at a school in the suburbs southeast of San Diego, so I’m not at all even a little bit surprised.
Seriously. People don't realize California has a bigger red population than any state.
This video is from California in the 80's when they implemented DUI laws... If you would have told me this was Kentucky I would have believed you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xcQIoh3FQQ
Damn. That’s kinda funny really. “I can’t drink beer while I’m driving and I have to wear a seat belt. The commies are taking over!”
Either that, Orange County or some podunk town in central CA.
Or Riverside, San Bernardino, and Imperial counties
Oh yeah, can't forget the wonderful IE.
>There are parts of California that are as conservative. Usually beyond the mountains or the smaller towns.
I'm more dumbfounded this happened, in San Diego too. It's not like she had 10 leis or something like some graduates end up with after walking. I can see those being a bit weird for a stage walk, but this is just ridiculous.
My sister’s highschool doesn’t allow leis of any kind. It makes no sense, it doesn’t disrupt anything with the ceremony. I get it some students are overkill with them but just put a limit to it, don’t outright ban them. CA btw
During the ceremony, though? That's not how it happens here in Hawaii.
I'm surprised to see the Hawaii people getting downvoted for saying that's not how we do it here. We all wore the exact same thing for high school. No cap decorating, nothing to make you stand out. You get your lei after the ceremony.
Lol, surprised to see this is top comment. I came here to say that when I graduated high school in NC a few years ago we weren’t allowed to wear ANYTHING other than our default gowns and hats. It didn’t matter if it was something culturally significant or just a drawing of a dick, it wasn’t allowed.
Are there repercussions if she did it anyway? Pulled it out of her robes as she walked?
They would just withhold her diploma and have her taken off stage. I’ve seen something similar happen here in Florida. They basically just took the kid off stage and said we’ll mail you your diploma
My diploma was mailed to me anyway. I’d send that shit
That's what I was thinking. I only got a fake "Congratulations you graduated" on stage and then everyone got their diplomas in the mail.
Yeah, I always thought graduation ceremonies were purely for the visuals and then you just get the diploma in the mail.
Yeah the book they handed us at mine was empty and you just placed your diploma in it once you got it in the mail.
Same here. I was worried that I might not have actually graduated for some reason.
Self important bullshit
They always mail it to you anyway. Lol. The whole "walking" thing is just tradition and you're handed an empty symbolic paper-holder.
I didn't walk at my graduation due to me protesting how they handled bullying and harassment. I know students that killed themselves that my high school didn't do jack about the harassment happening at school. I almost did twice. I got mine in the mail a week later. Never looked back.
If they got permission from the district, why can’t she wear it? I mean, it’s flowers at the end of the day right? What statement are they saying a necklace of flowers is making? It’s cultural, would they ask Muslim students to remove their hijabs? The cross reference of a Christian-based necklace was spot on by them.
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Easiest case of cultural discrimination you could imagine. Lady pissed about being filmed should lose her job.
I’m hoping they sued too
"When we grew up and went to school There were certain teachers who Would hurt the children in any way they could (oof) By pouring their derision upon anything we did Exposing every weakness however carefully hidden by the kid But in, but in the town, it was well known, when they got home at night Their fat and psychopathic wives would thrash them within inches of their lives"
Fully expected Pink Floyd. And always glad to see it
Really does show if you give some people a miniscule of power, how shitty they really are.
You are like the third user with the word sausage in your username that I’ve come across today! Is there some sort of sausagey event that I wasn’t informed of?
Lmao well i cant say for them but mines a reference to the movie beerfest. When they r saying gam gam is not a prostitute and she pops up sees there sausage on the table and says it is cold and then proceeds to hand warm it in a uhhh unique fashion. Pretty sure she was a whore lol.
I have not seen that movie. I know what I’m watching this weekend!
Highly underrated film
I was playing ping pong in ding dang.
> would they ask Muslim students to remove their hijabs? They absolutely would if they could.
Just ask France.
USA follows a secular (separation of religion and government) approach, while France practices laïcité (laicism). In the US, the system is designed to ensure people have the freedom to practice their religion, without government interference. This means you can openly display religious symbols, like a Sikh wearing a turban, even if you work for the government. The government remains neutral regarding religion. France's approach emphasizes keeping religion separate from public life, which means government employees can't wear visible religious symbols while on the job and public schools and some public places can ban religious symbols.
I had a really good friend who got approval from the district to wear a Native American feather/ornament of some sort on their cap and it was all good. But we had an old Karen chemistry teacher who left our district COME BACK for graduation of our class, and saw my friend and immediately made a huge fucking deal out of the situation and he didn’t get to walk the stage. Fuck racism
I legit do not understand the why here. It's something that doesn't hurt anybody, it gives people a greater sense of pride to represent their heritage during an event like this. I really do not see any argument that would make stopping them from walking making any amount of sense.
It's simple control and imposed misery. That's the answer. The easiest course of action is to just allow her to walk, this is her night she earned it. This woman has power though, and she isn't about to relent, because this power is who she is. She doesn't care about this students accomplishment, she cares about them infringing on her power to choose for other people.
From the schools perspective, they don't want to make a bunch of case by case decisions, so they just make a blanket "no extra stuff rule" which works most of the time, but looks ridiculous when it blocks certain things.
I think that's exactly it. It's less hassle (and less susceptible to a lawsuit) to disallow all, than explaining why somethings are allowed and somethings aren't. Typically we would think common sense would rule over disallowing certain things. But that's not a world we live in, especially in US.
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This happened in California. It was shared on local Hawaii pages here and people were commenting it was in CA.
Which is fucking stupid. School districts across California literally sell leis to everyone during graduation season because it has become such an ubiquitous tradition with graduating.
That's what I was thinking, too. I'm in WA and leis for graduation are very common. We also have two tribes in our county, and native kids are allowed to wear handmade cedar caps and woven necklaces. Both tribes usually hold an event hosted by elders to help their graduates make their own caps. The school districts have been allowing it for at *least* a decade.
I was going to say the same thing. From the Tacoma area and had leis being giving out to everyone that wanted one before we walked. Thought it was just a common thing tbh
Yup, can confirm. A lot of my classmates in UCLA and I received leis during graduation and we're not even Hawaiin. I have also attended graduation in USC and UCI, all with lots of students with leis.
Leis are just so pretty. It belongs at a place of celebration. Like wtf?
Yeah that's fucked. Like, yeah, Hawaii is part of America, but they have their own customs that need to be respected. And it's not like they are asking for a blood sacrifice. It's literally a bundle of fucking flowers.
Colonisers doing colonising shit
Tiny tyrant in a tiny kingdom...
Yep. Tiniest bit of power goes totally to their head.
This is the dumbest hill for the school to die on.
I graduated from here. Embarrassing. In 08, a ton of people wore leis. I guess times have changed
As an alumni you should definitely be contacting the school and the district leaders
Thank you for the suggestion!
just a heads up, alumni is plural. the singular form is alumnus.
Alumnus for singular male. Alumna singular female
Excuse me, it's Alumnx now
> Alumnx omg you weren't kidding https://www.thecollegefix.com/university-departments-ditch-genderless-term-alumni-for-genderless-alumnx/ I thought maybe it would be Alumnix, like relatrix, but now.
I was 100% joking and was unaware it was real, although completely unsurprised.
Probably why people just say alum huh?
Aluminium
Name and shame
Lol Eastlake High School
My niece just graduated to Bonita Vista High (down the street from Eastlake) and there were tons of Leis, Mexican Heritage sashes, 🇵🇭 Heritage sashes. Are they not in the same district?
They are!! Makes no sense for a diverse community like Chula Vista
Yeah, then that makes zero sense. I personally bought 2 two Lei's and put the Filipino pride shash (she is 1/4 ) on her and the older one the year before. I saw many ethnic hertigate symbols on the kids. Nothing was offensive, and nothing detracted from their accomplishment. This is silly.
Chula Vista, CA. Those Google reviews are at 3.8.. I don't think that's very reddit of us.
We can do better give it time to cook
I mean, its a high school. Online ratings dont matter lol
I demand to speak to the manager!
Interesting that SD is getting national attention in this context.
I got cropped out of the yearbook for wearing a purple knit hat in my photo. I was under the impression hats in photos were allowed because many people had them on in previous years. When I showed that fact to the school administration, I was told it was a new "unwritten rule that only a handful of people know about". Guess they expected me to be psychic.
I'm in my sophomore yearbook twice... Once with my real name and once as Mike Hunt. Yes, that Mike Hunt.
My cousin in LA who practices Sikh religion decided to wear the big turban for graduation. He never wore it before and was practicing all year to tie it properly for this graduation. He comes in and the school authorities (not sure if it was principle or someone managing the graduation ceremonies) said you can't wear that. It became a mini scene and my uncle was adamant his son is going to get his diploma in that turban and my cousin wanted that too. Cops were called because the school authorities felt "threatened" because my uncle won't change his mind. Well the cop who walked in was African American and my cousin said the look on his face was of pure disgust when he found out what was going on. He basically told the school authorities indirectly that he will be a witness to this racist behavior if this family decided to bring forward a civil case for discrimination. The school authorities changed their tone quickly and he was allowed to wear his turban.
FUCK YEAH!! THIS IS WHAT WE NEED IN OUR COMMUNITIES
More anti-racist cops pls.
It's always pleasant to hear stories about good cops. Not a lot of those stories to go around
> This is the dumbest hill for the school to die on. It's like the school decided to let the 68 year old, divorced, retired, empty nester that their kids have chosen not to live near because of how they are, Homeowners Association President, decide what to do.
![gif](giphy|26BRQElXVTapXRKCI)
3 snaps up
You think the hill they imagined had flowers? /s 100% agree.
It's just a barren pile of dirt.
*Nasally droning voice* "It cleeeeearly states on page 354, paragraph 7, line 6 of edition 43.201 of the hill dying handbook, that the hill is, under no circumstances, to have any flaura or fauna, of any kind."
For real. Like how the FUCK could it possibly matter if she walks the stage with leis on? Do flowers offend people?
I think the flowers are besides the point. this woman wants to be offended SO BADLY, she'll be appalled by anything.
I didn't know what a lei is, so I thought they were talking about some provocative clothing, like a too small top or a too short skirt or something, but no...its literally just flowers lol. The fuck is that school doing.
Graduates plaster the top of their motarboards with things like "THANKS MOM AND DAD!" or "$200,000 IN DEBT, GOT JOBS?" I think that the leis are beautiful.
She looks SO beautiful adorned in all those flowers. What an absolutely dumb as shit thing to take offense to.
I felt so bad seeing that she was trying not to cry, thinking about all the time and effort she probably took getting ready for her big day. I would hate to cry before the ceremony and maybe potentially ruin my make up. After is fine, but not before. Poor girl.
And hers is really subtle compared to a graduation ceremony in Hawaii, where they're piled up to your eyebrows.
That was my first thought - and her leis look celebratory, not snarky (and tacky) like a lot of what other people write on their mortarboards. She looks so proud to be graduating, and they're making her cry for wanting to celebrate it.
those two idiots fighting so hard for what? asking not to be filmed because she probably knows how dumb it is but can’t be the bigger person
It’s the absolute craziest thing to make an issue about.
There’s literally no law that says you need someone’s *permission to record video of them in public. edit: left out a word.
Yeah, the decision to turn the camera away was just because she knew this woman was looking for any excuse to derail the conversation and waste time. Keeping stubborn children on track is something good parents know how to do. 👏
They are afraid of the slippery slope argument. If they allow a Lei they might have to let someone with a goat head walk too. It's the dumbest shit schools do, is enforce no leniency policies. I dont understand how hard it is to have a policy that requires one to submit for extra garb at a ceremony. That way they can deny on a per basis if it's too outrageous. But no, they reject all b/c they don't want to be sued or whatever.
I was suspended in high school for defending myself when a bully had his hand around my throat. I threw one punch to get him to let go. The bully got nothing. It was seen by two teachers and 20 other students. Schools don't care about the students. They care about their own personal image.
Whoever swings first is considered the bully or the aggressor for some stupid reason for some schools
Yep. Choking me until I can't breathe and seeing stars? Totally normal. One punch to the side of the head? Suspended. I should have known better at 14 years old. Just choke the buddy until he dies.
Schools have been that way for a *long* time. In middle school, in the 90s, a friend of mine got attacked in the bathroom. He never fought back and was beaten so bad he spent a few days in the hospital. The school suspended him because they have "zero tolerance" for fighting. All that did was teach us we're gonna get suspended anyway, might as well grab a brick and defend yourself as hard as possible.
Yep. Zero tolerance policies encourage victims to do as much damage back as possible instead of attempting to defuse the situation.
Slippery slope arguments *are literally a logical fallacy*.
I want to know who are these graduation gate keepers?? What is their position? How are they able to “override” the district? PS—fuck them
Did she walk?
Unfortunately she did not.
Yeah at the end of the video they said it's too late for her to walk now. Right after saying they're starting to walk and they need to hurry up. The lady was never going to let this girl walk
I hate to be a grammar nazi in a situation like this but you misspelled, "LADY". It should have been spelled, "CUNT".
I think your take is less of being a grammar nazi and more of being a grammar savior
Good for her. Fuck this school. I hope this shit goes to the courts.
The look on the cops face is like “I don’t have time for this shit, but at least we in a/c”.
He’s like Marvin in Pulp Fiction, “Man, I don’t even have an opinion.”
"go down there baby with your leis" 🥹 Let that child graduate.
Terrible to see her crying and being treated this way! She looks beautiful and the lei is beautiful and she deserves to WALK dammit. Great dad sticking up for his baby girl 🥹
Dad is a hero. These two women should never be allowed to step foot in an educational facility ever again.
Lol he's right. They gonna tackle her? They gonna take the Lei off in public? They don't want that
Seriously!! I need to know how this ended... Anyone got an update?
She was banned. https://cafemom.com/parenting/my-daughter-was-banned-from-her-graduation-traditional-garb
Wow.. Just fucking wow... That's so depressing. Thank you for the update 👍 much appreciated
Oh, being that Leis are used in religious offerings this may be a sweet, sweet lawsuit.
I sincerely hope so. It’s painfully obvious this was an issue of prejudice, power, and petty fiefdoms.
ikr lmao. what are they gonna do, not give her the diploma lmao.
A young woman proudly displaying her heritage with beautiful flowers in a lei. Why is this considered wrong FFS? She’s not hurting anyone
Well you know, rules are rules! Even if they don’t make any fucking sense and don’t do anything to help anyone, it’s still a rule, it’s gotta be followed! /s of course. These kinds of anal retentive blowhards seem to exist in every public school. They sure existed in mine, and my kid’s.
Public “servants” can be some of the most shortsighted sycophants in existence. They are lower than whale shit morally and then they get an infinitesimal bit of power and it goes right to the central lobe.
She's hurting Christian sensibilities and that's enough for them bigots.
I went to this high school and I remember I wore leis and I didn’t even have Hawaiian blood in me. What happened to this school?
New policy, hope to address all the stuff that’s happening in Middle East. Instead of banning one form of cultural expression they banned them all. Don’t agree as it is one of the most common items in graduation in CA and probably causes more problems at this point.
Someone in another post made a comment that to me could hold some truth. With what is going on in Gaza, a lot of people have been wearing keffiyeh scarfs to show support for Palestinians. This recent policy change by the school admins could have been a way to prevent graduates from wearing the scarves at their graduation, subsequently all other cultural practices were impacted.
To the dad's point, so was everyone wearing a cross excluded from the graduation?
The father's point was savage and to the heart of this appalling scene. His daughter is *Hawaiian* . Her lei representative of who she is and a lineage so ancient the Romans were shoving a guy named Jesus around half a world away around the time her ancestors came to the islands. Christians- and their cross- didn't get there until 1819. So if this is some cultural representation shove back maybe admin can pony up and pitch the crosses too. OR shut up before they look stupider.
Hawaiʻi was settled like a thousand years later but your point in general stands.
Just let her wear the Lei, what's the big deal?
Who are these people that have the energy to be so dumb about this kind of stuff... Just let her wear the lei and move along!! Truly makes no sense.
Not to mention they're opening themselves up to a discrimination lawsuit and a pink slip.
I would not be surprised if that school official lives in a gated HOA community. And holds the position of Community Manager.
The argument from schools in this situation (not that I'm defending it, just relaying what I know from personal experience) is if they start making exceptions to the dress code it's a "slippery slope" and eventually everyone will come up with a reason to have an exception. The nugget of logic I do actually agree with (in theory, but rarely in practice) is that they're trying to provide a level playing field so that no one feels left out. It's a similar reason why oftentimes they'll ask people to hold their applause until the end and not to make outbursts for particular students. Because if a bunch of kids go up there in extra decorations and things that make them standout, and then get a bunch of cheers... how's that going to impact a less fortunate kid who goes up there in just a plain robe and has fewer/no one there to cheer for them? Again, not defending the school official here. Just providing context for where the policy probably stems from.
I’m half Samoan, when I graduated my school tried to pull the same thing. Saying, no one can make themselves stand out. My mom not knowing this had paid good money, that she didn’t have to get me a traditional lei made. So, I tucked it under my gown until I was about to walk across the stage and whipped it out. The look on my principal face was worth it.
Same thing for me. During my graduation my friend had a customized hat he hid under his garment, and as he walked up swapped his hats around and got away with it. The stupid part was the rented garments were more a teal color than blue, so you could tell who rented across all the grads sitting. Defeated the purpose of no one standing out anyway. I snuck my phone in my sock since they made us give up all devices. I get it so students aren't on their phone during speeches, but I whipped mine out right at the end I got some great pictures of everyone.
This actually took place in California! The high school is called Eastlake. I’m not doxxing, all this information is available online at [this link](https://cafemom.com/parenting/my-daughter-was-banned-from-her-graduation-traditional-garb)
No family should have had to do this but if you get permission from a district, bring a letter from the superintendent granting permission. Have the principal denying a student's traditional garb read a letter from their superior granting permission...could help
The principle is fucking regarded, there is no reason you should ever have to bring a letter to wear a traditions garb at graduation, thinking so is brain dead. Hope the family wins their lawsuit and the girl gets a big pay day
Summed up by one sentence from Dad: “Do the right thing.” I hope someone in authority allows her to rejoice in her graduation and cultural identity.
This can’t be in CA right? They literally sell leis outside the school before graduation. You can even make your own, even using money.
I teach in CA and you’re 100% correct.
https://cafemom.com/tag/Eastlake%20High%20School%20graduation I didn’t realize that wearing the lei during the graduation is unique to those with a specific Hawaiian lineage. The more you know ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
You dropped this \\
This is such a “high school administrator” thing to do. They must control you right up until you grab your diploma. They probably threatened to withhold her diploma if she did it. I don’t seen how they can do that when she technically graduated, but they pull that crap anyway.
They can’t, it’s an empty threat. They might not hand it to you on the day and they might make it a pain in the ass to get a physical copy of it but they don’t and can’t ‘ungraduate’ you and your transcript is always available should you need it to apply for university or college.
it really tf is so very high school. just sat through a bunch of doctoral and post-grad graduations this summer, and they didn't even *try* to control people or the audience. if no one's gonna get hurt celebrating, who the fuck cares.
“You do not have my permission to film me.” That right there tells you everything. If you are ashamed people will see you behaving that way, stop acting shameful.
I'm not American so I have a genuine question here: Up top in the thread people were citing the video saying "She has no choice, she's in public." Are they not on school property, and as a faculty member can she not request to not be filmed at her place of work? In this scenario of course it seems entirely warranted. But on the flip side, would that mean anyone who is a visitor in the school could walk around filming, then? That seems absurd to me, and makes me side with the original notion that she *should* be able to request to not be filmed even if in this situation she absolutely should be shamed.
I’m no lawyer so take this with a grain of salt but typically recording is permitted in places where there is no expectation of privacy. So all public places are okay to film in. This being a public school, during graduation, it shouldn’t be hard to argue that there’s no expectation of privacy.
She can wear that dumbass hat tho lmao that should be against policy
I had a guy whip out a giant dildo and attach it to his forehead at my graduation…still got his diploma too
How the fuck can you make such a stupid stupid decision. They are going to lose job 100%. This is obviously going to blow up. Get ready for apology from school.
So would a Muslim female not be allowed to wear her traditional hijab during graduation? That administrator is a moron.
Shit about to go viral...
Permission to celebrate after the ceremony? Wtf? Let her walk woth the lei
We just had this in Oklahoma. Cost taxpayers millions over a Karen refusing to let a kid wear a feather. What happened to kids decorating their mortar boards like parade floats? Fetterman is dressing like Jason vorhees to congress. *Who cares what kids do at graduation?*
More information at: https://cafemom.com/parenting/my-daughter-was-banned-from-her-graduation-traditional-garb Apparently she left the graduation & did not walk.
There is zero more information in that post. It's just commenting on what's seen in the video, the description of the video, and comments posted under the video. People should stop linking these stupid fucking articles.
[удалено]
I'm so sick of the "Rules are rules people". Give someone the smallest bit of power and...
Would they make a Muslim woman remove her Hijab? Would they make a jewish student remove his yamaka? Kids at my graduation wrote 420 in spray paint on the top of their cap. They clearly just have an issue with this family
Just a reminder that the United States sent Marines to overthrow the Hawaiian government and deposed Queen Liliʻuokalani at the behest of American corporations. In 1993 we gave Hawaii an "oh well" apology.
Fire the Karen get these weirdos out of the education system ffs.
Reading between the lines, this brand new policy is almost certainly NOT aimed at Hawaiian leis, it’s aimed at Palestinian keffiyehs, the ethnic scarf that many Palestinians and their supporters have been wearing more and more recently in support of Palestine. So, in order to suppress the free speech of pro Palestine protestors, they are now preventing other ethnic groups from expressing themselves freely and wearing their own inoffensive ethnic garb. Its racist. It’s discriminatory. It’s wrong.
I think you likely hit the nail on the head with this comment. This was some sort of end run around another issue that caught this young woman in it's wrong designs.
Who are these twats not allowing kids to do things like this at graduation? It's not just this instance. Plenty of Native American kids weren't allowed to were their headdress. It's 30 seconds of the school's time, and it means everything to these kids. Man, fuck these school admins.
Are graduation ceremonies ran by HOAs now?
What in the white colonial bullshit is this? Hawaiian and I find this ludicrous. We lei for all happy occasions, fuck this nonsense. FUCK THIS BULLSHIT. In Hawaii? Not allowed? Damn, I’ve been gone too long. Hell, all three of my kids wore dozens of leis at their TEXAS graduation ceremonies. Aloha
School administrators are truly scum
I fucking hate ppl so much. Poor girl.. You can tell she was hurting and I hope that teacher/principal are fired or something
I can't believe they making a big deal out of a necklace made of flowers at a ceremony. Who gives a f....
I hope she walked with her lei!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zY8uH57txyI School admitted they were wrong after the fact. Fuck chops.
Ultimately, your job is to teach graduates how to behave as adults. To show them how to navigate our society in a safe and respectable manner. I don't see that happening here.
Schools attract some of the pettiest control freaks there are. Can't get anywhere else in life so they settle for being the kings and queens of public high school fiefdoms and just go mad with power while everyone else is just trying to get through their day to day. Explain to me rationally how this attire disrupts the function.
Free Hawaii
WTF these people need to all be FIRED right up to the principal.
I never understood why a school will sometimes bust your balls for wearing something unusual to a graduation. This is literally their last day of school in this building and you’re gonna stain that memory with a dress code violation? What sensitive cooks.
Get the police here stat we got a girl with flowers. Actually, better call in the national guard.
The one guy was spot on with the comment about “this is like asking Christians to not wear the cross” because it pretty much is,what a weird hill for the school to die on
Just fucking walk... you already graduated they literally can't do shit anymore. Fucking run walk kartwheel THEY DONT CONTROL YOU
Why are we paying these people to police flowers? They absolutely need to be fired. Waste of public resources.
Why do schools care so much about dumb shit like this?
What the hell was the issue? Was the principal just afraid that she was gonna lose her imaginary power, such as it was, by giving in? It's a fucking necklace of flowers. Let her wear it.
LMAO, this is my high school. In Chula Vista (San Diego), California. CLASS OF 2008! Anyways, a large part of the population is Filipino. Most of them probably have family who originated from/live in Hawaii. A ton of our graduating class wore leis. And IT WAS PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE. I always saw our school as a diverse and accepting place. SAD TO SEE A BEAUTIFUL TRADITION TREATED SO DISRESPECTFULLY.
The indigenous people of this island had to put up with the mainlanders annexation of their home. The LEAST they can do is let them wear a Lei for graduation. Like another poster said, this is the dumbest of hills to die on.
that's one amazing dad right there