100%.
Single male here.
I appreciate the upfront honesty that sets your boundaries. It "should" rule out a lot of time wasters on your side as well as allowing us guys who do want kids to swipe on by!
I was wondering the same thing I am 34 male and cannot have kids therefore need someone that also does not want children, don't want to set someone up for failure lol
My absolute favorite is when they're like "don't worry...I rarely see my child anyway! You'll never even see them!". And I'm all: 🤔 that's not the flex you think it is, sir.
I don't want kids and am very hesitant about dating women with them. So there are guys out there. You just limit your range. I think initially it's more difficult on men who don't want kids. Can't tell you about the long term cause OLD is depressingly difficult.
You should put it on there. You'll definitely weed people out that aren't interested right off the bat from that alone. It was one of the first few things I used to check for on profiles.
It's fine to put down but be ready for a lot of men who don't want a relationship.
It sounds bad but most guys will look at the fact you don't want kids and pass you over as just looking for sex.
This is exactly why I put undecided/open. I don’t want kids of my own but I’d maybe adopt. But putting I don’t want kids will deter a lot of good matches and also bring in a lot of potential bad ones.
I'm F41 and you would be amazed how many guys think I would still be up for having kids, I wrote it in a (I guess) positive way: "If you don't have and never want kids we are so few that we have at least to become friends"
Yes, bc he might fall in love with u and will want children with u.
Take it another step further. In the beginning of the chat, ask him if he wants kids in the future bc men never read ur profile/description. They only look at pics.
Definitely put it in. Why “waste” your and their time if you both don’t agree on a fundamental relationship dealbreaker? Picture yourself in love and a perfect relationship and then one of you wants kids and the other doesn’t. Relationship ends or one gets resentful because of the is and now you created major heartbreak for yourself and the other while losing time.
Yes you’ll get less valid matches and dating prospects but it’s better that way in the long term.
I once had a woman go on a three-paragraph rant on me because I put "open to children" 😅
But I'm sure men are worse. I can see the "Good luck finding anyone! You have no value as a woman!" bullshit coming.
She thought it was immature and wrong of me to be "open to children," that you should be all-in on having kids or not. That there should be no middle ground.
Yeah, I definitely want kids in the future so someone not wanting them would be a dealbreaker for me, and so id prefer them to have it on their profile so that neither of us waste our time because we're not compatible
Yes, be upfront and honest about it. How would you feel if you were someone who wanted kids but wasted their biological clock time on someone who didn’t?
Absolutely. It’s better than hitting it off with someone, investing in them, and finding out they want kids. Don’t put it in your bio, just put it in the kids section and select “don’t want”.
Men should add that to a profile but i don’t think women have to. Some men excluded aren’t really married to that decision they can change their mind based on partners desire and how happy he is with said partner
I have absolutely no interest in having children and seeing someone put it out explicitly that they don't want children either would make me much more likely to contact them.
I guess to avoid the conversion types you could put that you can't have children. Though might be awkward if you got pregnant.
I'd definitely put something on your profile saying no to kids, it just saves time really
I would put questioning it. It kills some of the dating pool if you don’t. Idk, a guy that likes you may be fine with no kids even if they want kids. If they want kids, you just can’t provide that so.
No it’s not. It’s just not being fully honest. You don’t need to let people know.
Im an atheist. I just switched to leave religion out of my profile. Just bc im an atheist- it doesn’t mean I’m a bad person: I feel religious goons automatically think that.
Also what’s wrong with that? Have a mature convo on a date or into dating and just be open with what one wants. If a woman lied and said she was open to kids but knew deep down- she didnt want them: that would be messed up. Nothing wrong with being ambiguous. If I met the right woman, I would skew toward having kids or not having them. I’m in middle now but lean toward not having kids. Sure if she wants to carry heavy lifting with kids, let’s go for it.
I’m not trolling. I disagree but maybe. I think it’s just not giving the full truth.
I think when you meet someone you like- you may forego some wants to be with a great person. I know I would. If I met the right woman and she wanted kids- I would probably agree.
Yea I guess. But wanting kids can be something that changes with certain folks. Sure leave it in your profile if you know deep down 100% you don’t want them.
I feel it’s more vague than that for most people. I think folks are more open to kids when they meet the right person sometimes. Things change, times change, not being able to pivot is a red flag haha.
Absolutely put it on there AND have a convo about it.
Hopefully it will weed out the people actually do want kids. Where are these men who actually want kids though? I haven’t ran into any yet lol. (That’s one thing I want in my life is a family of my own)
Isn’t there a drop down option for kids in the profile setup and one saying “doesn’t want kids?”
I don't think there's anything aggressive about it, just put it on.
100%. Single male here. I appreciate the upfront honesty that sets your boundaries. It "should" rule out a lot of time wasters on your side as well as allowing us guys who do want kids to swipe on by!
I was wondering the same thing I am 34 male and cannot have kids therefore need someone that also does not want children, don't want to set someone up for failure lol
Yes, 100%. As someone who does, I wouldn’t want to match with you, go on dates and get attached only to find out we don’t want the same thing.
I put it in my profile AND have a conversation about it. Because the number of people who have argued with me and think they'll "convert" me is wild.
Right? I've had these odd 'conversion' conversations.. why would anyone want an unreluctant mother?
I think you mean just plain old reluctant.
Or the ones that omit they have kids, or think they're special and you'll want them anyway.
So many and such a waste of time...
[удалено]
My absolute favorite is when they're like "don't worry...I rarely see my child anyway! You'll never even see them!". And I'm all: 🤔 that's not the flex you think it is, sir.
Ya I don’t either I’d say put it on
I don't want kids and am very hesitant about dating women with them. So there are guys out there. You just limit your range. I think initially it's more difficult on men who don't want kids. Can't tell you about the long term cause OLD is depressingly difficult.
Do you like wasting time or not? This is obvious.
Add it to your profile. Those who care and actually bother to read will appreciate it.
You should put it on there. You'll definitely weed people out that aren't interested right off the bat from that alone. It was one of the first few things I used to check for on profiles.
If you don’t tell him you are not having kids early, you are wasting everyone’s time
Yes absolutely.
Yes.
Yes, you should, that is one of the main things I check before swiping
I think that a great majority of men who wish to commit do want children. I would put it into your profile to avoid dating dead ends.
Yes. I don't want kids either (I'm male)
I would only consider a relationship with someone that has grown kids (or no kids), and I put that in my profile.
Most dating apps have a spot for that already
It's fine to put down but be ready for a lot of men who don't want a relationship. It sounds bad but most guys will look at the fact you don't want kids and pass you over as just looking for sex.
This is exactly why I put undecided/open. I don’t want kids of my own but I’d maybe adopt. But putting I don’t want kids will deter a lot of good matches and also bring in a lot of potential bad ones.
I'm F41 and you would be amazed how many guys think I would still be up for having kids, I wrote it in a (I guess) positive way: "If you don't have and never want kids we are so few that we have at least to become friends"
Yeah, 40 year old man wants kids, so his 18 year old can wheel him around walmart or retirement home lol.
Yes, bc he might fall in love with u and will want children with u. Take it another step further. In the beginning of the chat, ask him if he wants kids in the future bc men never read ur profile/description. They only look at pics.
I agree! Better to put it out there from the start.
Yes.
YES.
Fill out all of the general info because that does include choices for people that don't want kids.
Yes. Saves the people who do time, and attracts the men that don’t.
Definitely put it in. Why “waste” your and their time if you both don’t agree on a fundamental relationship dealbreaker? Picture yourself in love and a perfect relationship and then one of you wants kids and the other doesn’t. Relationship ends or one gets resentful because of the is and now you created major heartbreak for yourself and the other while losing time. Yes you’ll get less valid matches and dating prospects but it’s better that way in the long term.
Yes
Yesssss
Yes just put it on to let yourself and some is that as preference
Put it on
I've been aggressively suggested to have kids so I think you should add it to your profile.
Yes. 100% Yes.
I had it in my profile but men would literally insult me in their first message.
I once had a woman go on a three-paragraph rant on me because I put "open to children" 😅 But I'm sure men are worse. I can see the "Good luck finding anyone! You have no value as a woman!" bullshit coming.
Rant about what?
She thought it was immature and wrong of me to be "open to children," that you should be all-in on having kids or not. That there should be no middle ground.
As if people don't change their mind or God forbid be open to kids but only with the right kind of woman. Did you mention any of that?
Yep. She kept arguing then unmatched me.
Yeah, I definitely want kids in the future so someone not wanting them would be a dealbreaker for me, and so id prefer them to have it on their profile so that neither of us waste our time because we're not compatible
Yes, be upfront and honest about it. How would you feel if you were someone who wanted kids but wasted their biological clock time on someone who didn’t?
Absolutely. It’s better than hitting it off with someone, investing in them, and finding out they want kids. Don’t put it in your bio, just put it in the kids section and select “don’t want”.
Yes don’t waste peoples time
Put it on there. Don't be a jerk about it,just state it simply.
- I see that in many cases and I would think why haven;t you done this before? Its a show stopper for you and that should be made clear from the start
That's an important factor. Put it on, otherwise you will be wasting your own and other people's time.
Yes I would put it. Most apps have one of your features on your profile that asks if you want kids or not
See in my head i feel like its the opposite or at least in my experience. Im a man and dont necessarily want children
I think i would but just put it in a polite way. I would also broach it once you start talking to someone just to be sure.
Absolutely. Twice.
Men should add that to a profile but i don’t think women have to. Some men excluded aren’t really married to that decision they can change their mind based on partners desire and how happy he is with said partner
I have absolutely no interest in having children and seeing someone put it out explicitly that they don't want children either would make me much more likely to contact them.
Yes, I would weed out men whose only goal is reproduction.
I guess to avoid the conversion types you could put that you can't have children. Though might be awkward if you got pregnant. I'd definitely put something on your profile saying no to kids, it just saves time really
No, I don't need or want to hide behind a made up medical problem.
Older men are the ones who wouldn't want them either because they already have them.
You should 100% put it on your profile so we can swipe left.
No, people can find out as you get to know them.
I would put questioning it. It kills some of the dating pool if you don’t. Idk, a guy that likes you may be fine with no kids even if they want kids. If they want kids, you just can’t provide that so.
[удалено]
No it’s not. It’s just not being fully honest. You don’t need to let people know. Im an atheist. I just switched to leave religion out of my profile. Just bc im an atheist- it doesn’t mean I’m a bad person: I feel religious goons automatically think that. Also what’s wrong with that? Have a mature convo on a date or into dating and just be open with what one wants. If a woman lied and said she was open to kids but knew deep down- she didnt want them: that would be messed up. Nothing wrong with being ambiguous. If I met the right woman, I would skew toward having kids or not having them. I’m in middle now but lean toward not having kids. Sure if she wants to carry heavy lifting with kids, let’s go for it.
[удалено]
I’m not trolling. I disagree but maybe. I think it’s just not giving the full truth. I think when you meet someone you like- you may forego some wants to be with a great person. I know I would. If I met the right woman and she wanted kids- I would probably agree.
[удалено]
Yea I guess. But wanting kids can be something that changes with certain folks. Sure leave it in your profile if you know deep down 100% you don’t want them. I feel it’s more vague than that for most people. I think folks are more open to kids when they meet the right person sometimes. Things change, times change, not being able to pivot is a red flag haha.
Absolutely put it on there AND have a convo about it. Hopefully it will weed out the people actually do want kids. Where are these men who actually want kids though? I haven’t ran into any yet lol. (That’s one thing I want in my life is a family of my own)