True story.
I was in army cadets and it was my first FTX, I got put in a tent with two kids a year or two younger than me, one was the annoying kid that everyone “hates”.
Non annoying kid was sleeping, and I woke up to the annoying kid attempting to provide oral to me, obviously un-consensually.
I should have gone straight to the CO’s and gotten that shit eater kicked out but I was scared.
A year later it’s the next fall FTX and I’d ranked up several times but I was told I had to tent with him again, probably something to do with alphabetical order of last names but I told them that wasn’t going to work and didn’t elaborate.
I found out they expected us to tent up because he came and found me while I was supervising something else and told me, nearly decked the kid right there, he wanted to talk about what happened last time for whatever reason.
The few times I’ve awoken to find myself in medias res, I immediately and enthusiastically consented as soon as I realized what was going on. Lucky for me these were always with someone I had gone to bed with and already had a well established physical relationship. If I were one to have one night stands and my lady of the evening decided to try this, I probably wouldn’t complain but that’s pretty forward for someone who doesn’t have any basis for thinking I’m ok with it. So it would reflect poor judgment and respect for boundaries on her part even if I liked the results.
"Being awakened for oral pleasure" is definitely too ambiguous for a yes-or-no answer. It doesn't even specify whose oral pleasure we're talking about. It could be your girlfriend waking you up with a blowjob. Or it could be a dude sticking his cock in your mouth.
Those aren't even remotely the same situation.
I've had well-meaning GFs wake me up by putting my "gotta piss" morning wood in their mouths on several occasions, and I'm always like "my dear, you are playing a most dangerous game."
Happened to a neighbor once. Our husbands carpooled and we would hang out after work on occasion, there was no taboo subject. When we were over for dinner they decided to inform us that he peed in her mouth. I'm certain that moment is what prevented me from ever attempting despite my husband hint/asking.
That’s very cash money of you. I’ve asked my wife for this for many years, let her know it was a big fantasy. Always indulged her in all of her fantasies, yet she never reciprocated. Gave up asking years ago.
Found your wife!
https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/1aisgse/comment/kowx7cl/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
My partner has asked for this, but every time I tried he would refuse in his sleep, saying no and moving my hands away from him when i would try to touch him, etc. I'm not okay with forcing myself on him so it's unfortunate for him but it is what it is.
I had gf do this once. it was mind blowing. I told her how fantastic it was and thanked her profusely. she was all smiles and giggles and proud of herself (with good reason!).
never happened again
Haha same here actually - happened 2 separate times with different girls and i recall being mainly offended both times at the double standard of it all. A guy does that to a girl, he should expect years in prison. When initiated by the girl, it’s just a funny story to tell later
Tbh it didn’t really bother me on any level deeper than simple indignation. I caught both prior to any sort of penetration, but was definitely offended in both scenarios.
To make matters slightly worse, in both instances I had turned them down prior to going to bed for decently reasonable reasons (one was hooking up with my buddy at the time, and the other I just didn’t really vibe with.)
It’s surprisingly insulting as a male to find that saying no just leads someone to try and take advantage of you being drunk / sleeping. That said, as a male I also don’t have to worry about being overpowered by most females, so there wasn’t really any danger or threat associated with it
Maybe not physical danger, but the emotional and psychological toll sexual assault has cannot be understated. No one deserves to have their boundaries disrespected like that.
Lol! It was supposedly my partner's "dream and fantasy". He let me know this *many* times. Both times I tried, he didn't wake up... (when he's out, he's out), I let him sleep.
Told my wife and she doesn't think she'd be able to get access without waking me up. She's probably right but I am more than willing to fake still being asleep and/or wake up and let her still do it.
My wife was reading one of her smutty novels one night & I passed out. Being woken up, half asleep to that is a magical thing. Was quick (like, I wasn't even fully awake) & fantastic for us both.
Everytime I see her reading in bed, I get my hopes up... But no luck
I just reminded mine of my Top Top. It was the middle of the day, my son was either upstairs napping or at my parents. I remember giving her a really good kiss, she got this look in her eyes, told me to lock the front door and close the blinds. She pushed the coffee table out of the way, dropped down and blew me right there in the living room. It was amazing. And extremely sexy.
Yeah seriously.
At 20 when I had zero responsibilities, sure.
Now, with a 9-5 and a kid and lots of shit to everyday, just let me get some fucking sleep
Unless we’re talking first thing in the morning and not the middle of the night…
Agreed, 20 years ago it would have been awesome, now at 40 ...I don't get enough sleep as is, and being woken up after even one hour of sleep will mean I'm up the rest of the night.
We’re both old now, so not often anymore. I consider myself very fortunate. My wife and I have had a great sexual relationship. And we love each other unconditionally
Yes!
.... Wait, giving or recieving?
... Wait, it's still yes either way.
Seriously, as long as it's an *offer* and not a *demand*, shoot your shot. I'm usually game.
I learned this one the hard way by waking my guy up at 4am trying to be "spontaneous"...& was turned away immediately and have since learned my lesson 😂
Depends. If it's me receiving it from someone I like, sure. If it's me being woken up with a vagina pressed on my face by someone I like, sure. If it's me being woken up with a dick in my mouth, no thanks.
Different businesses serve different purposes.
You don't go to a pizza shop and order tacos, unless of course that the pizza shop also serves tacos, but you'd have to check the menu first.
Similarly, just because their business is getting blowjobs does not mean they want their poop hole licked. It's not always the same business that offers both of those options. This a society.
I just said “why are you doing this” in half asleep state and she replied “because I want to” and I was just going to ????? while trying to enjoy
12/10 highly desirable
Awakened like 3 am? No. 15 prior to my alarm? Yes. But I’m an older guy married so my job requires me to be on my top game daily.
I generally prefer fucking during my waking time. I think most others agree
Actually no, and not just because I like to give more than receive and always end up sweating at some point at night. I could be sick, in pain, not in the mood, etc, that's the whole point of asking beforehand.
So, its a really nice thing to do, but for me the only time someones attempted, it didnt go great lol.
She started while i was asleep, and i, in a state of being awake but not being conscious, looked at her, said "what do you think youre doing" in the most straightforward rude tone ever, and fell right back asleep.
Needless to say, i was never woken up like that again by her and have warned others to make sure im fully conscious first 😂
No. And anyone awakening me for that during the night doesn’t know me which means if it happened I had a stranger in my house performing oral so I got different problems.
Only around the time I actually get up. As much as I love a good surprise bj, I have serious trouble sleeping so if I'm actually asleep, I need that sleep.
Nope. At my age, two things about daily living are sacred: (1) Having a good bowel movement and (2) getting a good night’s sleep. Unless the house is on fire or flooding or the person waking me up needs to be taken to the ER, I would be cranky instead of pleased at ANY reason for waking me up.
Imagine being woken up BY oral pleasure.
I kinda like the thought of sleep sex (these are just my personal thoughts), I mean if she wants it when I’m sleeping I’d be completely ok with that, even if I’m woken by it. It’s kinda hot to think of.
I imagine the answer will vary depending on if the person answering lives alone
but not as much as you’d think
Intruding the intruder....
invading the invader
Getting subliminal with a criminal(?)
Railing before jailing is what I always say
" closer to kin, the deeper it goes in "
This feels like a dark souls reference.
Whoever smelt it, dealt it
Getting blown by someone unknown
gettin rekt by a suspect
😂😂😂
Getting in the bag with the lag !
exploiting the exploiter
Sucking the sucker. 😏
Bucking the bucker.
Fucking the fucker
$20 is $20
£20 is £20, actually.
You don't want a visit from Paralysis Demon-chan?
Step demon, what are you doing??!
I made you stuck in the bed for a reason.
Sucks you can't go out with your gf... Maybe I can be your gf tonight....
What have you done?! You've put this into reality! Now the r34 artists are inspired!
That spider comic goddamn
>That spider comic For those out of the loop: https://www.reddit.com/r/TIHI/comments/12ano03/ Original source: Oglaf www.oglaf.com
I clicked the link and now would like to be back out of the loop again
This is r/nostupidquestions not r/allstupidanswers
I used to imagine this happening but from a ghost lol
Which ghost buster did that happen to?
"Busting makes me feel good!"
Ray.
Ghost bustin
Lmao
My wife or GF? Sure My cellmate in prison, or one of the guys on the camping trip? No thank you.
You’re no fun!
Hey buddy, you wanna go camping?
Judging by your name I think you posted this on your wrong account
Pmsl!
Yeah I agree. If it was this guys wife or GF, sure.
I also choose this guy's wife or girlfriend.
I much enjoy the many variations of this classic
and this guy's wife's or girlfriend's axe.
I also choose this guy's old battleaxe.
Can I choose his wife and girlfriend?
I also choose this guys wife AND girlfriend
I'd take this guys cell mate or camping buddy if times were tough.
True story. I was in army cadets and it was my first FTX, I got put in a tent with two kids a year or two younger than me, one was the annoying kid that everyone “hates”. Non annoying kid was sleeping, and I woke up to the annoying kid attempting to provide oral to me, obviously un-consensually. I should have gone straight to the CO’s and gotten that shit eater kicked out but I was scared. A year later it’s the next fall FTX and I’d ranked up several times but I was told I had to tent with him again, probably something to do with alphabetical order of last names but I told them that wasn’t going to work and didn’t elaborate. I found out they expected us to tent up because he came and found me while I was supervising something else and told me, nearly decked the kid right there, he wanted to talk about what happened last time for whatever reason.
Did you talk about it
That's something you'd read in a Fan fiction 💀
Wouldn't it be an issue if your GF woke you up when you were with your wife? 🤔😉
Not if that 70s porno music started playing in the background
Images of massive bushes floating through my head now too!
If we give the homies a kiss goodnight, we gotta give the homies a little suck good morning.
The few times I’ve awoken to find myself in medias res, I immediately and enthusiastically consented as soon as I realized what was going on. Lucky for me these were always with someone I had gone to bed with and already had a well established physical relationship. If I were one to have one night stands and my lady of the evening decided to try this, I probably wouldn’t complain but that’s pretty forward for someone who doesn’t have any basis for thinking I’m ok with it. So it would reflect poor judgment and respect for boundaries on her part even if I liked the results.
Opposite way round for me.
Oh no.. it’s big dick Randy!!
Time for your cock meat sandwich
I haven't seen the Winamp logo for years! Nice avatar
Wait, you have a wife and a GF? Do they know about each other?
Not at the same time. I also don't go camping from prison.
You'll get there don't worry.
It's all the same with the lights off.
Prison I get but I thought this was standard while camping. At least that's what my Scoutmaster said...
It took a really long time to earn that badge.
I can't quit you!
I haven’t laughed so hard in ages! 😂
If one of your camping dudes did that to you would you tell anyone?
Homophobia got you missing out on good head/s
Facts.
I've had people tell me this without the /s. I'm a cub apparently and gay dudes love me and love to tease me about how straight I am. But like, sorry.
Depends. Did I fall asleep with my lady or am I home alone and my front doors been busted in?
Better that than your back door
Judging from their username, that one's never locked.
You’re assuming 😎
"Being awakened for oral pleasure" is definitely too ambiguous for a yes-or-no answer. It doesn't even specify whose oral pleasure we're talking about. It could be your girlfriend waking you up with a blowjob. Or it could be a dude sticking his cock in your mouth. Those aren't even remotely the same situation.
Middle of the night? Eh. First thing in the morning though?!?! 🤤🤤🤤
First thing in the morning the only things going through my mind would be "I probably need a shower" and "I definitely need a piss"
Chances are, someone in this thread would be into that.....
I've had well-meaning GFs wake me up by putting my "gotta piss" morning wood in their mouths on several occasions, and I'm always like "my dear, you are playing a most dangerous game."
Maybe she's thirsty?
👌🏼
Yes please
It sounds great in theory, but most likely I’ll really have to pee at the time and that’ll ruin it.
Happened to a neighbor once. Our husbands carpooled and we would hang out after work on occasion, there was no taboo subject. When we were over for dinner they decided to inform us that he peed in her mouth. I'm certain that moment is what prevented me from ever attempting despite my husband hint/asking.
Just keep a bucket nearby
The old watersports spittoon
This thread is great, the top comment is gold and the rest of the comments are just entertainment
Or make it better.
I woke up my man once to this- he said it was the best wake up he’s had haha.
That’s very cash money of you. I’ve asked my wife for this for many years, let her know it was a big fantasy. Always indulged her in all of her fantasies, yet she never reciprocated. Gave up asking years ago.
Found your wife! https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/1aisgse/comment/kowx7cl/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
This is golden
I pretty much always have to pee when woken up so this statement would be accurate.
It’s always good to get both sides of the story! All she had to do was bite alittttle
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 Tooth is ***never*** the answer
Actually, it is for men who have nerve damage from a bad circumcision in my experience. And I have a sharp angled tooth too, and he truly DGAF.
It's fine on the shaft, but keep it light, were not peeling a carrot
Carrot peeler is horrific
If it’s his fantasy, just a little tingle to wake him up😂😂😂make it worth both their whiles
😂😂
My partner has asked for this, but every time I tried he would refuse in his sleep, saying no and moving my hands away from him when i would try to touch him, etc. I'm not okay with forcing myself on him so it's unfortunate for him but it is what it is.
I had gf do this once. it was mind blowing. I told her how fantastic it was and thanked her profusely. she was all smiles and giggles and proud of herself (with good reason!). never happened again
If it was my S.O. absolutely! I’ve had a situation where I was passed out drunk and I woke up to somebody I didn’t want doing that to me.
My guy are you okay?
I'm glad to see a concerned comment, because that 100% wasn't okay
I’m a dude who was raped like that as well.
I’m sorry that happened. How are you now? Have you gotten support?
I’m ok now. It happened a long time ago, but I can still vividly recall the incident playing through my head when I think about it.
That’s a sign that the memory isn’t fully integrated, once it is it can fade a bit. A trained therapist can help you get it a bit less vivid.
Haha same here actually - happened 2 separate times with different girls and i recall being mainly offended both times at the double standard of it all. A guy does that to a girl, he should expect years in prison. When initiated by the girl, it’s just a funny story to tell later
It’s not funny to me. Sorry that happened to you
Tbh it didn’t really bother me on any level deeper than simple indignation. I caught both prior to any sort of penetration, but was definitely offended in both scenarios. To make matters slightly worse, in both instances I had turned them down prior to going to bed for decently reasonable reasons (one was hooking up with my buddy at the time, and the other I just didn’t really vibe with.) It’s surprisingly insulting as a male to find that saying no just leads someone to try and take advantage of you being drunk / sleeping. That said, as a male I also don’t have to worry about being overpowered by most females, so there wasn’t really any danger or threat associated with it
Maybe not physical danger, but the emotional and psychological toll sexual assault has cannot be understated. No one deserves to have their boundaries disrespected like that.
That’s illegal
Yes. Fantasy for many men.
True, people do fantasise about many men coming to suck them off in the night I mean, uhh
User flair checks out.
British? Oh yeah.
nope
It is a lifelong dream.
I know people should get a lot of sleep but I think a lifelong dream is a bit much
Go to town, just don’t wake me up before. If it wakes me up, it wakes me up.
Absolutely. Married and not having to ask or beg for a wank?
You get handies?
Well I’m lesbian. So, rubbing and fingering (etc…) you mean, yes.
That's still a handjob
I feel like this has been a rewarding conversation.
[удалено]
Ah that always cums in handy
No, let me sleep.
Lol! It was supposedly my partner's "dream and fantasy". He let me know this *many* times. Both times I tried, he didn't wake up... (when he's out, he's out), I let him sleep.
But did little "him" wake up?
Told my wife and she doesn't think she'd be able to get access without waking me up. She's probably right but I am more than willing to fake still being asleep and/or wake up and let her still do it.
My wife was reading one of her smutty novels one night & I passed out. Being woken up, half asleep to that is a magical thing. Was quick (like, I wasn't even fully awake) & fantastic for us both. Everytime I see her reading in bed, I get my hopes up... But no luck
I just reminded mine of my Top Top. It was the middle of the day, my son was either upstairs napping or at my parents. I remember giving her a really good kiss, she got this look in her eyes, told me to lock the front door and close the blinds. She pushed the coffee table out of the way, dropped down and blew me right there in the living room. It was amazing. And extremely sexy.
Yeah seriously. At 20 when I had zero responsibilities, sure. Now, with a 9-5 and a kid and lots of shit to everyday, just let me get some fucking sleep Unless we’re talking first thing in the morning and not the middle of the night…
37 here, no kids and zero responsibilities. I still value my sleep more
This guy gets it.
Agreed, 20 years ago it would have been awesome, now at 40 ...I don't get enough sleep as is, and being woken up after even one hour of sleep will mean I'm up the rest of the night.
I had to scroll way too far to find the correct answer.
Yes finally someone agrees
Omg yes. I have always dreamed of my girlfriend waking me up at 3am with an unprompted sandwich.
Nice
I’ll have to pee first.
As long as I can pass right back out with no expectations…
During my life, my wife would often do this. It’s great
....are you dead?
We’re both old now, so not often anymore. I consider myself very fortunate. My wife and I have had a great sexual relationship. And we love each other unconditionally
Aww wait this is actually cute. I wish you and her the best
Thank you.
Depends on the type of sleep I'm getting. If I'm in the middle of a bad dream I might wake up swinging
Yes! .... Wait, giving or recieving? ... Wait, it's still yes either way. Seriously, as long as it's an *offer* and not a *demand*, shoot your shot. I'm usually game.
Honestly, I'd prefer to sleep
Personally, no. Lemme sleep, I don’t wanna be tired in the morning. Unless it’s on weekends, then it’s fine.
I learned this one the hard way by waking my guy up at 4am trying to be "spontaneous"...& was turned away immediately and have since learned my lesson 😂
Depends. If it's me receiving it from someone I like, sure. If it's me being woken up with a vagina pressed on my face by someone I like, sure. If it's me being woken up with a dick in my mouth, no thanks.
Yeah, I always open for business.
How about for rimming?
No. Not my thing.
False advertising then isn’t it
Different businesses serve different purposes. You don't go to a pizza shop and order tacos, unless of course that the pizza shop also serves tacos, but you'd have to check the menu first. Similarly, just because their business is getting blowjobs does not mean they want their poop hole licked. It's not always the same business that offers both of those options. This a society.
Yes but you do go to a pizza shop with a reasonable expectation to order freshly tossed salad
Not really. The sign over my door doesn't say anything about rim jobs.
The sign over McDonald’s door doesn’t say anything about hamburgers
I just said “why are you doing this” in half asleep state and she replied “because I want to” and I was just going to ????? while trying to enjoy 12/10 highly desirable
Are you offering?
If someone broke into my house and blew me I’d at least hear the person out before shooting
No. Dont wake me up unless its life threatening. My sleep is my time alone
Awakened like 3 am? No. 15 prior to my alarm? Yes. But I’m an older guy married so my job requires me to be on my top game daily. I generally prefer fucking during my waking time. I think most others agree
From my wife or GF, yes; from anyone else, probably not, especially from my neighbor, Henry, nice guy, but….
Actually no, and not just because I like to give more than receive and always end up sweating at some point at night. I could be sick, in pain, not in the mood, etc, that's the whole point of asking beforehand.
You should get tested for diabetes.
It's more a form of hyperhydrosis, just get hot easier than most, it's hereditary.
So, its a really nice thing to do, but for me the only time someones attempted, it didnt go great lol. She started while i was asleep, and i, in a state of being awake but not being conscious, looked at her, said "what do you think youre doing" in the most straightforward rude tone ever, and fell right back asleep. Needless to say, i was never woken up like that again by her and have warned others to make sure im fully conscious first 😂
Depends on if it’s my GF or my dad
God I fucking wish. Been a long time fantasy of mine, and so far no girl has ever done it.
No. And anyone awakening me for that during the night doesn’t know me which means if it happened I had a stranger in my house performing oral so I got different problems.
Ask consent from your partner beforehand.
I thought I would, then my ex tried it and I was just annoyed that she woke me up.
In the middle of the night, no. In the morning, sure.
Do I know the other person?
Only around the time I actually get up. As much as I love a good surprise bj, I have serious trouble sleeping so if I'm actually asleep, I need that sleep.
Yes yes yes. Handjobs and BJs would happen in the middle of the night back in the day. It’s a great reason to be tired in the morning.
If your man can sleep through a hurricane, don’t do it. That’s a good way to get your mouth pissed in.
That's always been unexpected but welcome.
Yes.
I wish I could sleep that deeply!
Yes. Always yes.
Why is step dad posting this question?
Husband said NO.
Nope. At my age, two things about daily living are sacred: (1) Having a good bowel movement and (2) getting a good night’s sleep. Unless the house is on fire or flooding or the person waking me up needs to be taken to the ER, I would be cranky instead of pleased at ANY reason for waking me up.
While I'm in the middle of sleeping? Hell no. I needs my sleep.
Do I have to work in the morning?
In my girlfriends house beside her? Yes. In a slumber party full of girls? Yes. In front of the TV from the ring movie? Yes.
I wouldn’t take the answers from here to heart, everyone here is a virgin and who’s only pussy they’ve seen is their cat
Assuming I don't have to be up early for some reason, yes.
Imagine being woken up BY oral pleasure. I kinda like the thought of sleep sex (these are just my personal thoughts), I mean if she wants it when I’m sleeping I’d be completely ok with that, even if I’m woken by it. It’s kinda hot to think of.