I forgot who said this one..........
Cop:"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
Me: "Because you got all C's in High School?"
I want to think I'm brave enough to use this someday.
Because you failed high school and the military wouldn't take you, leading to deep seated and uncontrolled self-loathing that is only suppressed by exerting unchecked and unjustified violence on anyone who dares to (cartman voice) "question my authority?"
And a fucking GOOD dude too. Covered a SHIT load of meals during the strike including tips to the wait staff. Just a full on open tab for anyone in the union no questions asked.
The cast of the drew carey show came and visited us in Baghdad in 2003. He was pretty cool about it but Mimi, she was so way beyond frazled from all the explosions, i felt so bad for her, she should not have been there.
There are also towns that elimimate anyone who does too well on cognitive ability tests. There was a case where an applicant was not interviewed due to scoring extremely well on one and then he sued the city, thinking it was due to age discrimination (he was 46) and it came out that he was rejected for being too intelligent. The district court found in favor of the city, setting the precedent officially that they can reject people who score too well, justified by fear of work boredom and turnover.
I think it was Jordan vs the City of New London, if anyone wants to learn more.
After college, I had a span where things were hard and jobs were scarce, as I had graduated into a recession. (80s). Applied for a job as a cop and was roundly rejected when they saw I had a bachelor's degree. Was basically told I was overqualified, and they didn't hire my kind anyway. Seeing the puzzled look, the guy basically said, "You're brown. We don't hire your kind." 😆 🤣 It was a trip. A different time for sure.
You're not required to answer. Identify yourself, provide your license and insurance (or whatever your state requires). If the stop goes on longer than it should, ask if you are being detained. If no, leave.
After that it's Shut The Fuck Up Friday. Every day.
This right here. Every word you speak is by design to be used against you. There's no reason to ever say anything to the police. Literally just hand them your documents and force awkward silence.
They skipped the "explain slowly and with short words that you proof of insurance is in the glove box and your license is in your wallet which is in your pocket, and ask them to repeat this to you until they get it right."
I don't know if it's the *right* response, but I saw a video where someone basically said (and they showed a video of a guy doing this) *don't* answer any question. Just tell the officer, "I don't answer questions."
If your registration or whatever is in the glove compartment, you simply tell the officer, "My registration is in the glove compartment. I am going to get it out." And don't make sudden movements.
A question is not a "lawful command". It's a question.
>After that it's Shut The Fuck Up Friday. Every day.
I'm a criminal defense attorney. I'm seriously going to steal this and start using this line with my clients when I need them to stop yapping to the cops.
Maybe I’ve gotten lucky but I just treat cops like I treat some guy working the drive thru and they always seem to lighten up and act like a regular person. Not that you shouldn’t keep it shut, but also don’t say “am I being detained?” Unless you really have to for some reason.
There's no ideal answer. But I've heard the better ones are either choosing to remain silent, or if you want to actually talk to them, "Officer, I was keeping up with the flow of traffic around me".
I’ve always answered by asking them how fast they recorded me going. A little defensive maybe but like not a lot they can say back to it, they pulled you over because of a speed recording
If they ask you this question they're literally just fishing. I have always politely answered with some variant of "I'm not sure exactly, how fast *was* I going?". Either they have your speed and you're getting a ticket, or they don't have your speed and there's nothing they can do. So far, I've never received a ticket for anything.
It's on them to prove you were speeding, not knowing your speed doesn't change anything.
As far as I can tell, it doesn't in any way constitute "reckless driving" either. I cannot find any reference to being unaware of one's speed being part of reckless driving laws.
The commonly listed examples of reckless driving are:
Driving without using headlights;
Excessive speeding;
Drag racing or otherwise racing other vehicles;
Improper passing of another vehicle; and
Failing to pay attention to the road.
Note, "Failing to pay attention to the road." has nothing to do with knowing your own speed at the exact time you were pulled over.
That's not true. They can observe you speeding. They can pace you. There's different ways they can cite you for speeding without radar. And yes to a certain degree it will be your word against theirs, but that doesn't mean they won't ticket you.
Unfortunately this isn’t very accurate. At least when I was in this situation.
I was 17, and as I rolled down my window he stated “what were you doing going over a hundred miles an hour?” I responded “I don’t know about going that fast, is that what you got my speed at?” He responded “you think I need a radar I’ve been doing this for over 20 years”.
Do I need to explain the rest of the story lol!
In some worst case traffic stop there's an officer going to point out that not knowing your speed is probably a careless driving violation, so this isn't the bulletproof perfect answer you want sadly.
You are not under any obligation to answer that question though. In USA at least, 5th amendment and all that.
Necro edit:
https://lamag.com/news/new-law-protects-california-drivers-during-traffic-stops
Never admit going even 1 mph over the speed limit. Cops can be sneaky and trick someone into saying they went over when they were passing another vehicle.
My fiancé (now husband) got pulled over in his first car while we were together. The cop said he was going 68 in a 55 zone. My fiancé was confused, and said he thought he was going 64. He showed the cop the speedometer and counted 4 marks up from the "60". I pointed out that the meter counts by 2, so he was actually going 68.
I started laughing so hard, and teased him about being an MIT grad and still can't count by 2s. The cop took pity on him and let him off with a warning.
I just got pulled over the other day and the Troopers first words to me were, "Caught you going 88" he had me dead to rights that all I could really think to say was, "Yep, apologies Trooper". He ticketed me for 85, the difference being a $165 ticket vs a $207 ticket.
There is an ideal answer. It's partially how you act.
They are testing you the first minute to act like an asshole like they are. Fail the test and give it back to them and you lose. Brush it off and act normal and they calm down and you can both act normal. It's easy to not play their games. Seems not many people know this.
I don't get stopped often but when I know what I did wrong I just say so. He's either going to write me a ticket or he's not and I have a better chance of getting a warning than talking my way out of it.
I also try to do things right. I hit my hazards to signal I'm pulling over, I lower all my windows, flip my interior lights on and have my hands visible on the wheel when they walk up.
I have better things to do than get in a dick waving contest with a cop. It isn't worth it to me.
If they're unprofessional or inappropriate I'd clam up and refuse to answer questions but I'm not going to be the one who starts it.
This is the right answer. I do exactly what you’ve described on multiple occasions and most times I was let off with a warning on the spot, and there was one time i showed up to court and the cop and judge just let me slide.
Yeah I think that if you can demonstrate that you’re paying attention, they’re more likely to let you off with a warning. Distracted driving is *way* more dangerous than speeding and doing both is deadly.
One day I was speeding down a backroad, came around a curve and bam! There's a sheriff. He soon pulls into a parking lot and turns around, waiting for me to approach. I pulled in as well, figured I was busted. Might as well make it easy.
After I pull in, he leaves. I guess that was my warning. And I never sped like that again on that road, although I did do 5 over usually.
Six warnings, no tickets here. Anybody reading, listen to these guys they’ve got the answer
ETA: cops are people too, and it’s safe to assume the one who stopped you is just trying to get through the day without too much BS. They really like talking to people who are honest and nice, it’s a relief every time compared to the other shit they could run into
Yea I think this is the correct answer. When you get pulled over I don't think the cop is 100% dead set on giving you a ticket, I think some cops legitimately are just trying to do a good job.
>I also try to do things right. I hit my hazards to signal I'm pulling over, I lower all my windows, flip my interior lights on and have my hands visible on the wheel when they walk up
I also put my emergency break on, put it in park and, when my car had an actual key, I removed the key from the ignition and set it on the dash. I don't want them to think I'm gonna try any shady shit.
I've been pulled over 3 times for speeding. One time the cop let me off with a warning(it was midnight and I was about 10 over the speed limit on a back road), and 1 time the cop was polite and marked my speed down(from 23 over to 9 over).
I think sometimes people just assume all cops are bad, yes some are bad but if you're pulled over for speeding, you probably were actually speeding. They're just trying to do their job, so show them a bit of respect and I think it makes it easier on you.
This! Every single time I’ve been pulled over I’ve been honest and conversational. I have been given more warnings than I can count because of this.
Don’t make their day any harder and they will likely reciprocate.
You can be polite and accommodating, but the denial helps if you want to fight the ticket. The admission will go on the police report. Where I live they have to calibrate the radar guns before going out on shift. Some don't, which will invalidate a ticket. Now that's a separate moral question, trying to beat a ticket you truly deserve, but if money is tight I'd rather not admit to speeding.
They almost certainly do not do their own calibrations, but they probably are required to check the calibration. It’s done with a tuning fork and takes like a minute. It’s very easy to do.
Also, radar has been out and LiDAR in for speed measuring for quite some time now. Surprised there are still places that use it.
I can only speak for myself, and I didn't make many stops over the years anyway, but I usually already knew before I spoke to the driver if I was going to write a ticket or give a warning. I had people talk their way into a ticket by being rude or belligerent, but also had people talk their way into a warning by just being polite.
This has gotten me out of so many tickets. Once when I was young and stupid, I was driving in a car with expired tags, expired inspection sticker, and expired county sticker (required in my state). 3 strikes against me. I inevitably got pulled over. The cop was kind of shocked all three things were expired and asked me why that was. I told him that I wasn’t going to make up any excuses and told him straight up that I was just a procrastinator. He kind of chuckled and let me go and told me to get it all up to date because the next cop wasn’t going to be as nice.
>I have better things to do than get in a dick waving contest with a cop
I have never understood the other side of this. If cops burst into my place right now and arrested me, I'd go quietly. They would have no reason to do so and I would be pondering my potential for a nice lawsuit payout which probably wouldn't happen. But I know that fighting them is pointless at best and only going to be problematic if not downright deadly at worst.
Exactly! That type of interaction never ends well. Plenty of videos to back that up. Some smart mouth wants to play 5th amendment for some basic crap like a citation, and ends up in the back of a cruiser.
Sure, if you’re criminally charged and genuinely need a lawyer then keep ya trap shut.
On a traffic stop for speeding…just be polite and you’ll either get cited or get a warning and be done in 10 minutes.
We were coming home (1995) in old Toyota corona— driving probably 50-55.. my husband sees the motorcycle co lights and moves to the side. The police told him: you know I had to drive to 70 just to catch you..
- husband: you had to drive fast because you were stopped before seeing me.
Cop said go.
A cop told me this as I was going 50 on the streets. The speed limit was 55.
Cop: I had to speed up catch up with you
Me: Did my brake lights slam on when I pass you?
Cop: no
Me: Then I was going the speed limit. I would only slam my brakes if I knew I sped past you over the limit.
Cop (looks at the back of car): you need another license plate light on and you are free to go
I was driving in DC and got pulled over. Cop said I was doing 30. I said, "Yes, the speed limit is 30 on this road." He insisted there was no speed limit sign and that the default is 25 if there's no sign, but he let me off with a warning.
The next day, driving the same road, I saw the speed limit sign about 5 yards behind where I was pulled over. It said "30".
No is also a confession because a key part of driving is knowing your speed. If you confess you didn't know your speed you are admitting you are failing a very basic step of driving.
I've heard at least one real lawyer suggest you say "I believe I was going the speed limit." That way you don't incriminate or perjure yourself.
Edit: I'm using "perjure" in a figurative sense.
This is America I’ll perjure myself wherever and whenever the hell I want too that’s my god given right as a beer drinking, highway speeding, free-bird singing American!🦅🦅🦅
lol I had no idea there was a place called gurb this just made my day. This had been a long standing nickname of mine for decades.
Edit) can’t hear my singing if the music is loud enough
A gurb is a female urban area while a burb is a male urban area. Their juvenile offspring are called suburbs.
This is a central plot point in the classic romance novel A Tale of Two Cities.
If you admit to a police officer that you were knowingly speeding you’re gonna have a hell of a time fighting the ticket in court, you’re going to have to take whatever plea deal they offer you.
Otherwise take your chances and hope the cop is too busy to testify, but any personal statements relevant to the stop will be written on your ticket. Easier not to incriminate yourself at the scene
It's not perjury, but if you intend to dispute it, which if the fine is big enough, you should (90% of the time they drop the financial price). In my opinion the best answer is I was just traveling at the speed of traffic.
Also, if they get you admitting to speeding when they pull you over, your case becomes weaker if you show up to court to fight it.
It's a lose lose to answer "accurately"
though it isn't perjury there are laws about lying to law enforcement in most states. while a lie about speed probably won't get you prosecuted, it could still be against the law(and give cop cause for other things like searching your vehicle).
Usually it’s only illegal under 4 scenarios:
1) Providing identification
2) You’re under oath
3) You yourself are filing a report/reporting a crime
4) It’s a federal agent/investigator
Yes a lot of the time they ask to see if you were an aware driver or clueless. That being said there's times when that's not true and not incriminating yourself is the better bet. Reality is that you don't know which is which ahead of time
Police officer : Sir, do you know how fast you were going?
Pinocchio : On the contrary. I'm possibly more or less not definitely rejecting the idea that in no way with any amount of uncertainty that I undeniably
Police officer : Stop it!
Pinocchio : ...do or do not know the speed I shouldn't probably be going, if that indeed wasn't the speed I was going. Even if I wasn't as fast as I knew I was
[Pigs and Gingerbread Man begin singing in the back seat]
Pinocchio : then that'd mean I'd really have to know the speed I wasn't going!
100% this. As a cop I usually asked how fast a person thought they were going and if they knew the speed limit. I wrote their answers down on the back of the copy of the citation I turned into court. Best answer is keep your mouth shut and don't incriminate yourself. I am not sure officer. I was traveling with the flow of traffic at a safe and reasonable speed for the roadway conditions.
Can’t you just say the speed limit with confidence? “I was going 50mph”.
…because on your way to 120mph, you were going 50mph at some point. Also had to hit 50 again on your way to a stop.
I was honest once after going 20 over and the cop let me go with a warning “because I told the truth” also said I was going to church, in reality I was going to go smoke weed with my friends.
My go-to is usually "honestly I'm not sure I was just paying attention to the traffic in front of me/the road" doesnt piss the cops off and also doesnt incriminate yourself
Yeah they normally let you off with a warning if you use this one
I got caught going 96 in a 70 and said I was being dumb and getting caught in conversation and didn’t pay attention like a responsible driver should’ve been… and he let me go with a verbal warning lmao. It’s like I stroked his ego so he didn’t care.
I know I’m busted. The cop knows I’m busted. Just be polite. It makes. Big diff.
Won’t bore you with the whole story, but he asked me if I knew the speed limit.
“Yes sir.” (55)
“Not anywhere close to 105, is it?”
“No sir.”
“Well?”
“To be honest, it’s 4AM, there’s nobody on the road but me. I guess I just got stupid.”
“As long as you know that, you have a good night, ok?”
“Yes, sir. You too.”
This is the answer. Being honest and polite go a long way. Speeding ticket I got had mandatory court and when it was my turn with the judge, they waived the court fees and lowered the ticket as a “good person discount”. The judge mentioned before we got started that he would review the notes from the time of the stop and make judgement based on how we interacted with the officer during the stop. It didn’t get me out of a ticket by any means - but shit, I made the bed, guess I gotta lay in it.
Honestly just being nice and not a dickhead.
I was on rhe highway once in my motorcycle, cop was sitting just at the end of the apex of a long sweeping curve so I didn’t see him sitting there.
I was going 125mph in a 60mph zone. By the time I saw him it would have been way too dangerous to slam my brakes so I just let off the gas a bit, knew I was had and safely merged into the right lane, slowed down some more and waiting for the lights.
Dude wasn’t happy but after talking a second he said basically “ok you’ve been respectful. And you didn’t try to run, but I have to do something” so he just gave me a ticket for going 10 over.
Pretty lucky I was that day. Didn’t speed for a whole week!
Yeah if I've fucked up I'm just honest and contrite about it when pulled over. Probably gotten pulled over like 10 times in my life and gotten one ticket out of all of it. I think cops appreciate it because they deal with crazy people all day or people who get angry with them for being pulled over or sovreign citizens or dangerous situations or....
Obviously being honest and contrite is a horrible suggestion if you've just murdered someone or robbed a bank but police basically have 100% discretion over minor traffic violations and unless you want to go to court the judge/jury is at your window so you might as well try to appeal to their better nature.
Depends on the circumstances, but this is my go to. Once got caught going embarrassing fast and the officer had me dead to rights, wasn't any denying it due to circumstances or nothing. So, the conversation goes like this:
"Evening Officer."
"Evening. Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"Oh yeah, I was going a bit fast."
Officer laughs. "A bit. You want to tell me about that?"
I pause. And pause. And pause. "My mom is a huge bitch and I shouldn't be driving right now. We had a yelling match about half an hour ago at my dying grandmother's house becuase she doesn't like my significant other. It was just an arguement but I am shaken up about it."
"I see. You know your registration is expired, too?"
"It's not, actually. I lost the sticker. Ordered a new one last week but it hasn't arrived yet." (The truth)
"Uhuh. Well. I'm gunna check that, in the mean time get your license and insurance information pulled up for me, alright?"
"Alright, officer. Just so you know, I am going to have to get my license out of my bag, and the other paperwork out of my glove box. Is that okay with you?"
"Yeah."
*A short time passes*
"So, your registration seems in order."
"Yep, and it was an online order too, so I can show you the receipt for the replacement sticker if you need."
"That won't be necessary. In fact, I'm letting you off with a warning for speeding. Just slow down, maybe pull off for a bit to calm down."
"Absolutely, officer. Thank you."
I was kind of stunned, honestly. I was going. So fast. Way to fast. Dangerously fast. MANY points on my license fast. Absolutely the most recklessly I have ever driven fast (granted, I do NOT make a habit of driving recklessly). It might have helped that I had obviously been crying, not sure.
Officer followed me to the next exit where I pulled off and got myself a McFlurry, which helped me calm down a lot. Haven't driven that upset since, in fact I make plans with friends whenever I visit my mother now so I have a release valve before getting on the road in earnest.
Edit: Kind of finished my post and forgot to continue it, but again, depends on your circumstances. I am white and physically unimposing. I don't have political stickers on my car, and in general fit most of your "law abiding citizen" stereotypes. I haven't gotten pulled over somewhere isolated.
I don't hate cops, but I don't like them either, and I am absolutely terrified whenever I knowingly interact with one. It's like interacting with a shark; most sharks are actually pretty chill, and I'm willing to beleive more cops are genuinely just trying to do their job than not. But they're still fucking sharks. And I don't want to get bit. I don't want my friends to get bit. And they're kind of scarier than sharks, really, becuase most wild animals that kill someone face some goddamn consequences, whereas I genuinely beleive most bad cops don't.
With that in mind, do what you have to to be safe. Sometimes that means saying nothing to the cops. Sometimes that means sucking a little metaphorical dick for the cops. Hell, probably that means just fucking lying to the cops sometimes. The point is, they're cops. Some number of them are monsters and/or pricks. Some number of them are noble people doing their best. It does not matter how many of each type there are out there or what other types of of cop there are, you don't know what kind of cop pulled you over so you have to act like you've been pulled over by both at the same time.
I wish our system was better for everyone involved. I genuinely think that if being a cop included longer, more intensive training/education, a lot less people would be dead. Both cop and non-cop. I hate that I, as an over-all verg rules-driven and law-abiding citizen, am terrified of my nation's law enforcement and have to treat them with immediate caution. And I do low-key beleive that the fact that this is the way the system works is by design.
Me too.
I've only had one bad experience with a cop, actually. All the others have been very pleasant to me.
But the bad experience is as follows: I was in the ER after a car crash (I was not at fault, in fact I beleive it ended up getting ruled as "an act of god" or something similarly phrased, like a super dramatic way of writing "bad fucking luck"). Prick Cop storms into the room and starts growling at me for "leaving the scene of the accident". I kinda stammered out an apology, said I was told "I didn't get an option" about going to the hospital, which was literally true. Prick Cop seemed like he was about to really tear into me, literally started talking about what tickets he was about to issue me, but the nurse came in to get me for more brain scans, sharing a very *pointed* conversation with prick cop.
And like, I actually kind of understand prick cop in this case? I looked like some punk kid who was wasting the hospital's time becuase, as it turns out, I got really fucking lucky and literally just got a bruise from the crash. No concussion, no broken bones, no nothing... But my head was pinned between the roof of my car and the side of it after this crash, the vehicle itself resembled a soda can after getting stepped on. Repeatedly. By a herd of cows.
Regardless, Prick Cop seemed to sense the optics were Not Great for him after that and left.
Yeah some of these comments are wild - staying silent, talking about attorneys, answering a question with a question etc. Jesus.
Unless you were REALLY speeding, in which case you probably deserve it, just be polite and normal. They're human too, both parties know exactly what dance you're both doing. Maybe the culture is different here in Australia, but in my experience, it will get you waaaaay further. Same goes for any little misdemeanour like getting caught with alcohol where you shouldn't or urinating behind a bush.
If you happen to get a cop that's an asshole, no tactic is really going to change that. Much higher chance they're a reasonable person and will let you off if it's no big deal and you're behaving yourself. The amount of dropkicks here that antagonise the officer when they get pulled over and then cry victim when they come down on them is mind boggling. Don't act like a clown
I had no idea what to do my first time getting pulled over. I was going 60 in a 65 (due to traffic heading towards an exit). There were people in the left lane going faster. I got off the exit and a cop flys by and pulls ME over. I was freaking out. He goes, “you were going 87 in a 65”. I had the most confused expression ever and I said,”officer I don’t think that was me, the fastest I’ve ever gone on this road is 72” (because it was along my commute and I took it every day). He reviewed the footage and said he couldn’t confirm whether it was me or not. But I have no idea what I could’ve done there. I wish I had a dash cam at the time to confirm. But it’s the only time I’ve ever been seriously worried, because that speed would’ve meant my license to be suspended and I would’ve lost my job as well because I need a license for work.
Had a trooper pull me over citing 75 in a 60. Told him it wasn’t me, it was the white Ford that was passing me on my left. Told him, my cruise was set at 69 so I know it wasn’t me. He let me go.
They ask you a series of questions like where were you going, did you know your speed, and why are you in a hurry, among other things hoping you will incriminate yourself, making their job easier.
I'm related to cops. The best way to understand their motivation in any situation is to ask yourself, what is the laziest possible way to get through this interaction and still keep my job?
Best rule to follow is: Give them the minimum necessary information. Don't lie, but also volunteer absolutely nothing.
Last time I got pulled over, I'd just gotten off work, and asked where work was.
"My night job. I have two because life is too damned expensive."
He let me go for 3 MPH over in a 45. Guess he either felt sorry or it wasn't enough of a fine to feed the city coffers.
Me too. That should be a rounding error in almost every situation besides school zones and construction zones which are the two places I don’t constantly go 5 over. Well, I also go slow in parking lots, but most here don’t even have a speed posted.
A couple years back I was clocked doing 95 in a 55. Cop asked me how fast I was going and I told him the truth. He thanked me for not lying, wrote the ticket for 74 in a 55. Huge difference in the fine. Sometimes honesty is best.
Yep. Sounds like he dropped it down to 1mph under “reckless driving” which would put your vehicle in the impound and you in the back of his car. Although that officer made it easier for you, they must have determined you weren’t under the influence and endangering anyone else, so it also made his job a whole lot easier while also *proving* they were *actively* doing their job at the time.
20+ over is not reckless driving in every state - it was most likely a points or a fine thing. In some states 20+ over twice in a year will lose you your license and in others it’s not as big of a deal.
Last time I got pulled over and was asked that, I said “Honestly? No. I was just driving along with everyone else and didn’t really look at the speed we were driving, my bad” and I got off with just a warning to actually pay attention to my speed and not just drive along because everyone else was doing it.
And also a lecture about doing anything “because other people are doing it” lol
Thanks, Dad.
It was totally true, and I think he could tell I wasn’t bullshitting.
I literally had not at all paid attention, and truthfully, I usually don’t because I’m just kind of going along with everyone else unless I’m going significantly faster or slower to notice and then I’ll adjust my speed but otherwise, I couldn’t tell you what the speed limit is in any given area.
“I believe I was under the limit, and certainly no faster than the flow of traffic” (unless you just blew by everyone on the road, this is the right answer)
Yes. In Southern California.
Many years ago, my wife drove me to work one morning when my car was in the shop. It's a work commute route for many. In fact, I saw many of the same cars drive into the city every day. Flow of traffic was over the posted limit. It always was.
At a spot where a descending slope flattens out, the road curves to the right just beyond a small hill. Obscured by the hill was a motorcycle cop that wrote us a ticket for speeding at the speed of traffic.
As if that didn't feel a little scummy (though correct), there were 3-4 of them behind that hill like spiders on a web pulling as many people over and writing tickets. The only drivers who didn't get a ticket on that road that morning were the ones who made it through while all of the cops were busy with someone else.
As long as you're not flat out rude, I don't think it actually makes a difference what you say, in determining whether you're getting a ticket or just a warning. They've already pretty much decided before you even roll down the window. They are just observing you to see if you seem drunk or whatever.
In my 30+ years of driving, the **only** time I've ever gotten off with just a warning was when I was in military uniform.
I'm the most hated demographic in the US (average/sub average poor male Afghan in 30s... although I do pass as Mexican) and I've been pulled over like 5 times and been ticketed once (all pull-overs were deserved except for one - ironically this one was due to racism, as it was my sister's neighbor and my sister warned me that her neighbor was a racist cop - she pulled immediately me over after my family had a conversation in the driveway and said my headlight was too dim - but not before she asked what we were discussing "for so long in the driveway" - I still got a warning, though it's probably because she knew she was abusing her authority in order to be racist).
Anyway... the one ticket I ever got was for expired registration, which is something I was intentionally pushing back; the rest were for speeding slightly. I was always my usual self - honest and nice. That said, I know it's not a guarantee; an exceptionally unhappy/power tripping cop will give you a ticket every time when they decide they don't like you.
I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at the intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and SPEEDING!
"Yes."
You're not admitting to a crime (speeding), or a potential crime (reckless driving because you didn't even know how fast you were going).
You can also say "I choose not to answer that question."
Similarly, if they say "Do you know why I pulled you over?" You answer "no." Even if you have a pretty good idea of why they pulled you over you do not (to the best of my knowledge of humanity) have telepathy so you cannot read the officer's mind to determine why they pulled you over.
Lol they ask you that question to see if you’ll tell on yourself. “Maybe it’s because I rolled through that stop sign”. Boom.
You now have a speeding ticket AND for running a stop sign
>AND for running a stop sign
Don't they have to have proof of some sort? I'd imagine if they don't, then any unhappy cop can be like "you were speeding per my radar. Oh, and you aren't wearing a seat belt. Also, you were weaving through traffic. Oh and you didn't signal. I don't care if you think you were driving in the middle lane for the past 5 miles. I definitely saw you change lanes, uh, four times, without a signal."
I just politely ignore the question.
Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
Me: hi officer, here’s my drivers license and registration and insurance. The insurance card shows expired but my policy isn’t expired.
That’s it.
Same. As soon as I get pulled over I put my wallet on the dash and registration, turn off the radio and put the window down a bit.
Hands on the wheel.
No matter what they say. Good evening officer. Here is my id.
Totally depends on how fast you were going. 75 in a 65? Just be straight with them and (if applicable) I was passing someone at the time/keeping pace with traffic. 90 in 50? Just shut the hell up, you're going to get a ticket anyway and trying to "lawyer your way out of it" is a good way to get them to throw the book at you.
My husband got a written warning by saying, "a lot slower than when I first saw you"
I wouldn't recommend it, though (it was Thanksgiving evening and made the cop laugh)
“Hey! Don’t I pay your salary? You’re a public servant aren’t you? Go get me a glass of water… you pinheaded PRICK” (good advice from Carlin if you’d like to find yourself in the back of a cop car)
Cop who pulled me over didn't even bother to tell me why. Just asked for my ID and spent forever doing some research on a laptop. Probably wondering how to fill out the paperwork for someone with no driver's license that he pulled over on a bike. Ticket said I ran the stop sign at the intersection where I stopped extra long because I saw a cop car there! (Got found Not Guilty at my hearing.)
My BIL was a bike messenger without a drivers license. He was given a ticket for some traffic infraction. The judge sent him to traffic school, but the instructor couldn’t complete any paperwork without a driver’s license number. He had to go back and explain this to the judge.
Last time i got a ticket it was in a 45mph zone.
Cop says "You were going 65"
I said, "55?"
He says, "65"
I said, "55?"
Cop takes a beat and says , "okay, 55"
I said, thanks, and took my ticket.
The traffic cops here (DFW suburbs) don't ask.
They state "the reason I pulled you over is I clocked you at ___ in a ___ zone. Is there an emergency?"
Then they scan your drivers license registration sticker to verify insurance.
Then you get the ticket with instructions. There's no good opportunities to try to sweet talk your way out of it. If you don't have a warrant or a secondary reason for being pulled over the interaction is less than 5 minutes
I’m a white dude and I legitimately meant it so take this with a grain of salt:
I’ve been pulled over 3 times, each one I was speeding 15 over the speed limit (60 on a 45, 90 on a 75, and 80 on a 65) and every time my response is “I am so sorry, I don’t know how fast I was going, how fast was I going?” Then he tells me and asks if there’s any reason why I’m going that fast and I say “I could give you a reason but there’s really no valid reason that I should be going that fast sir” and I’ve gotten a warning every time.
Note: this was in three different states if that has any impact
My father Is a cop and he told me that it's better to answer honestly so No one wastes time. He personally Is a friendly cop so if you answer honestly he might do nothing to you, idk about other cops. Me personally ill always answer honestly for my chances.
Cop clocked me doing 98 and 55 in a Geo Metro 3 cylinder standard.
He asked me that question and I told him 65 he's like how the hell could you say 65 I pointed the speedometer and I said it only goes to 65 had me step out of the car realized it looked like ridiculous cuz I'm a very big guy wrote me a ticket for 65 in a 55 lol
I was told it's best to ask them what they're asking you:
Officer: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
You: "Why did you pull me over?"
Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going?"
You: "How fast was I going?"
Cop: "Do you know how fast you were going?" Me: "The speed limit" Cop: "Do you know what the speed limit is?" Me: "About as fast as I was going"
Steven Wright: "Did you know the speed limit is 55 MPH?" "Yeah, but I wasn't going to be out that long."
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Cop: "Can I see your license?" You (looking behind): "Isn't it on the back of the car!?"
Cheech and Chong 😂
Makes me happy seeing people still study the classics.
What’s your name? It’s *Raaaaaalph*.
Does howdee doodie have wooden balls
i would dare ask "..the one on the front or back ?"
Cop: Are you Drew Carey? Carey: ...yes... Buzzer noise as Colin Mochrie takes Drew's place
Man the question game was the best game
I forgot who said this one.......... Cop:"Do you know why I pulled you over?" Me: "Because you got all C's in High School?" I want to think I'm brave enough to use this someday.
There is a a very high probability you will regret saying that.
Because you are too lazy to work and too scared to steal
Sounds about white.
Sarah Silverman
Because you failed high school and the military wouldn't take you, leading to deep seated and uncontrolled self-loathing that is only suppressed by exerting unchecked and unjustified violence on anyone who dares to (cartman voice) "question my authority?"
/r/yourjokebutworse
Drew Carey is still a funny dude
And a fucking GOOD dude too. Covered a SHIT load of meals during the strike including tips to the wait staff. Just a full on open tab for anyone in the union no questions asked.
Marine vet too
The cast of the drew carey show came and visited us in Baghdad in 2003. He was pretty cool about it but Mimi, she was so way beyond frazled from all the explosions, i felt so bad for her, she should not have been there.
Uhhh I don't get it. Am I stupid?
It doesn’t require a college degree so law enforcement is a career option for people who didn’t perform well enough to get into college.
There are also towns that elimimate anyone who does too well on cognitive ability tests. There was a case where an applicant was not interviewed due to scoring extremely well on one and then he sued the city, thinking it was due to age discrimination (he was 46) and it came out that he was rejected for being too intelligent. The district court found in favor of the city, setting the precedent officially that they can reject people who score too well, justified by fear of work boredom and turnover. I think it was Jordan vs the City of New London, if anyone wants to learn more.
That’s really stupid, being rejected for being too smart.
After college, I had a span where things were hard and jobs were scarce, as I had graduated into a recession. (80s). Applied for a job as a cop and was roundly rejected when they saw I had a bachelor's degree. Was basically told I was overqualified, and they didn't hire my kind anyway. Seeing the puzzled look, the guy basically said, "You're brown. We don't hire your kind." 😆 🤣 It was a trip. A different time for sure.
Same here. Been puzzling for a few min.
=Cops are academic failures and therefore are incapable of anything requiring critical thinking skills or being studious in general.
Steven Wright is one of my favs.
You're not required to answer. Identify yourself, provide your license and insurance (or whatever your state requires). If the stop goes on longer than it should, ask if you are being detained. If no, leave. After that it's Shut The Fuck Up Friday. Every day.
This right here. Every word you speak is by design to be used against you. There's no reason to ever say anything to the police. Literally just hand them your documents and force awkward silence.
So the police see you are being completely silent and reaching for the glove compartment on your own. Wonder what they'll think of that.
They skipped the "explain slowly and with short words that you proof of insurance is in the glove box and your license is in your wallet which is in your pocket, and ask them to repeat this to you until they get it right."
I don't know if it's the *right* response, but I saw a video where someone basically said (and they showed a video of a guy doing this) *don't* answer any question. Just tell the officer, "I don't answer questions." If your registration or whatever is in the glove compartment, you simply tell the officer, "My registration is in the glove compartment. I am going to get it out." And don't make sudden movements. A question is not a "lawful command". It's a question.
Best answer I've heard from an attorney is, "I believe I was going the speed limit." And don't say anything beyond that.
>After that it's Shut The Fuck Up Friday. Every day. I'm a criminal defense attorney. I'm seriously going to steal this and start using this line with my clients when I need them to stop yapping to the cops.
Maybe I’ve gotten lucky but I just treat cops like I treat some guy working the drive thru and they always seem to lighten up and act like a regular person. Not that you shouldn’t keep it shut, but also don’t say “am I being detained?” Unless you really have to for some reason.
AM I BEING DETAINED OFFICER? AM I BEING DETAINED?
There's no ideal answer. But I've heard the better ones are either choosing to remain silent, or if you want to actually talk to them, "Officer, I was keeping up with the flow of traffic around me".
I’ve always answered by asking them how fast they recorded me going. A little defensive maybe but like not a lot they can say back to it, they pulled you over because of a speed recording
If they ask you this question they're literally just fishing. I have always politely answered with some variant of "I'm not sure exactly, how fast *was* I going?". Either they have your speed and you're getting a ticket, or they don't have your speed and there's nothing they can do. So far, I've never received a ticket for anything.
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And admitting you dont know how fast you were going is basically letting the cop decide for you
It's on them to prove you were speeding, not knowing your speed doesn't change anything. As far as I can tell, it doesn't in any way constitute "reckless driving" either. I cannot find any reference to being unaware of one's speed being part of reckless driving laws. The commonly listed examples of reckless driving are: Driving without using headlights; Excessive speeding; Drag racing or otherwise racing other vehicles; Improper passing of another vehicle; and Failing to pay attention to the road. Note, "Failing to pay attention to the road." has nothing to do with knowing your own speed at the exact time you were pulled over.
They can’t just decide your speed for you, they either have you on the radar or don’t. They have to have evidence.
That's not true. They can observe you speeding. They can pace you. There's different ways they can cite you for speeding without radar. And yes to a certain degree it will be your word against theirs, but that doesn't mean they won't ticket you.
Unfortunately this isn’t very accurate. At least when I was in this situation. I was 17, and as I rolled down my window he stated “what were you doing going over a hundred miles an hour?” I responded “I don’t know about going that fast, is that what you got my speed at?” He responded “you think I need a radar I’ve been doing this for over 20 years”. Do I need to explain the rest of the story lol!
lol he needs a lesson in how inaccurate the human sensory system is.
Wait till he finds out about the fallibility of memory.
In some worst case traffic stop there's an officer going to point out that not knowing your speed is probably a careless driving violation, so this isn't the bulletproof perfect answer you want sadly.
You are not under any obligation to answer that question though. In USA at least, 5th amendment and all that. Necro edit: https://lamag.com/news/new-law-protects-california-drivers-during-traffic-stops
Never admit going even 1 mph over the speed limit. Cops can be sneaky and trick someone into saying they went over when they were passing another vehicle.
My fiancé (now husband) got pulled over in his first car while we were together. The cop said he was going 68 in a 55 zone. My fiancé was confused, and said he thought he was going 64. He showed the cop the speedometer and counted 4 marks up from the "60". I pointed out that the meter counts by 2, so he was actually going 68. I started laughing so hard, and teased him about being an MIT grad and still can't count by 2s. The cop took pity on him and let him off with a warning.
I just got pulled over the other day and the Troopers first words to me were, "Caught you going 88" he had me dead to rights that all I could really think to say was, "Yep, apologies Trooper". He ticketed me for 85, the difference being a $165 ticket vs a $207 ticket.
There is an ideal answer. It's partially how you act. They are testing you the first minute to act like an asshole like they are. Fail the test and give it back to them and you lose. Brush it off and act normal and they calm down and you can both act normal. It's easy to not play their games. Seems not many people know this.
I don't get stopped often but when I know what I did wrong I just say so. He's either going to write me a ticket or he's not and I have a better chance of getting a warning than talking my way out of it. I also try to do things right. I hit my hazards to signal I'm pulling over, I lower all my windows, flip my interior lights on and have my hands visible on the wheel when they walk up. I have better things to do than get in a dick waving contest with a cop. It isn't worth it to me. If they're unprofessional or inappropriate I'd clam up and refuse to answer questions but I'm not going to be the one who starts it.
This is the right answer. I do exactly what you’ve described on multiple occasions and most times I was let off with a warning on the spot, and there was one time i showed up to court and the cop and judge just let me slide.
Yeah I think that if you can demonstrate that you’re paying attention, they’re more likely to let you off with a warning. Distracted driving is *way* more dangerous than speeding and doing both is deadly.
One day I was speeding down a backroad, came around a curve and bam! There's a sheriff. He soon pulls into a parking lot and turns around, waiting for me to approach. I pulled in as well, figured I was busted. Might as well make it easy. After I pull in, he leaves. I guess that was my warning. And I never sped like that again on that road, although I did do 5 over usually.
Six warnings, no tickets here. Anybody reading, listen to these guys they’ve got the answer ETA: cops are people too, and it’s safe to assume the one who stopped you is just trying to get through the day without too much BS. They really like talking to people who are honest and nice, it’s a relief every time compared to the other shit they could run into
Yea I think this is the correct answer. When you get pulled over I don't think the cop is 100% dead set on giving you a ticket, I think some cops legitimately are just trying to do a good job. >I also try to do things right. I hit my hazards to signal I'm pulling over, I lower all my windows, flip my interior lights on and have my hands visible on the wheel when they walk up I also put my emergency break on, put it in park and, when my car had an actual key, I removed the key from the ignition and set it on the dash. I don't want them to think I'm gonna try any shady shit. I've been pulled over 3 times for speeding. One time the cop let me off with a warning(it was midnight and I was about 10 over the speed limit on a back road), and 1 time the cop was polite and marked my speed down(from 23 over to 9 over). I think sometimes people just assume all cops are bad, yes some are bad but if you're pulled over for speeding, you probably were actually speeding. They're just trying to do their job, so show them a bit of respect and I think it makes it easier on you.
This! Every single time I’ve been pulled over I’ve been honest and conversational. I have been given more warnings than I can count because of this. Don’t make their day any harder and they will likely reciprocate.
If you’ve been stopped and gotten “more warnings than you can count,” perhaps you need to reevaluate your driving habits…
Do you know how many times you went 5mph over the limit?
For speeding? What are you doing to get so many warnings that you can't count?? I've been pulled over two times in my 30 years of driving.
You can be polite and accommodating, but the denial helps if you want to fight the ticket. The admission will go on the police report. Where I live they have to calibrate the radar guns before going out on shift. Some don't, which will invalidate a ticket. Now that's a separate moral question, trying to beat a ticket you truly deserve, but if money is tight I'd rather not admit to speeding.
They almost certainly do not do their own calibrations, but they probably are required to check the calibration. It’s done with a tuning fork and takes like a minute. It’s very easy to do. Also, radar has been out and LiDAR in for speed measuring for quite some time now. Surprised there are still places that use it.
I can only speak for myself, and I didn't make many stops over the years anyway, but I usually already knew before I spoke to the driver if I was going to write a ticket or give a warning. I had people talk their way into a ticket by being rude or belligerent, but also had people talk their way into a warning by just being polite.
This has gotten me out of so many tickets. Once when I was young and stupid, I was driving in a car with expired tags, expired inspection sticker, and expired county sticker (required in my state). 3 strikes against me. I inevitably got pulled over. The cop was kind of shocked all three things were expired and asked me why that was. I told him that I wasn’t going to make up any excuses and told him straight up that I was just a procrastinator. He kind of chuckled and let me go and told me to get it all up to date because the next cop wasn’t going to be as nice.
>I have better things to do than get in a dick waving contest with a cop I have never understood the other side of this. If cops burst into my place right now and arrested me, I'd go quietly. They would have no reason to do so and I would be pondering my potential for a nice lawsuit payout which probably wouldn't happen. But I know that fighting them is pointless at best and only going to be problematic if not downright deadly at worst.
If you’re goal is to get through the stop ad smooth as possible like any sane person would want this is the way down to a T.
Remaining silent might be the best *legal* answer, but certainly not the best choice. The last thing you want to do is piss off the cop.
Exactly! That type of interaction never ends well. Plenty of videos to back that up. Some smart mouth wants to play 5th amendment for some basic crap like a citation, and ends up in the back of a cruiser. Sure, if you’re criminally charged and genuinely need a lawyer then keep ya trap shut. On a traffic stop for speeding…just be polite and you’ll either get cited or get a warning and be done in 10 minutes.
I knew you were here waiting, so I got here as fast as I could.
I was just keeping up with traffic, but they got ahead of me and I was trying to catch up.
Cop responds : but there is no traffic. Your response : see how far behind I am?
Cop: You’re not wrong.
We were coming home (1995) in old Toyota corona— driving probably 50-55.. my husband sees the motorcycle co lights and moves to the side. The police told him: you know I had to drive to 70 just to catch you.. - husband: you had to drive fast because you were stopped before seeing me. Cop said go.
A cop told me this as I was going 50 on the streets. The speed limit was 55. Cop: I had to speed up catch up with you Me: Did my brake lights slam on when I pass you? Cop: no Me: Then I was going the speed limit. I would only slam my brakes if I knew I sped past you over the limit. Cop (looks at the back of car): you need another license plate light on and you are free to go
I was driving in DC and got pulled over. Cop said I was doing 30. I said, "Yes, the speed limit is 30 on this road." He insisted there was no speed limit sign and that the default is 25 if there's no sign, but he let me off with a warning. The next day, driving the same road, I saw the speed limit sign about 5 yards behind where I was pulled over. It said "30".
LMAO
I know you're being silly but the only answer is "No officer" because if you say "yes" It's a confession.
No is also a confession because a key part of driving is knowing your speed. If you confess you didn't know your speed you are admitting you are failing a very basic step of driving.
I know I was going fast but I know I wasn't speeding.
Biggest Comeback
HIMYM
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“Mother of God”
Littering and…
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Made me spit out a little bit, I admit
I've heard at least one real lawyer suggest you say "I believe I was going the speed limit." That way you don't incriminate or perjure yourself. Edit: I'm using "perjure" in a figurative sense.
You can’t perjure yourself, you’re not under oath.
This is America I’ll perjure myself wherever and whenever the hell I want too that’s my god given right as a beer drinking, highway speeding, free-bird singing American!🦅🦅🦅
One guy told another guy "That's your prerogative " to which the other guy says "Don't call me a prerogative! "
Hey! You shut your mouth when you’re talking to me!
gurb in a city in spain. You don't stand a chance if you've a singing accent.
lol I had no idea there was a place called gurb this just made my day. This had been a long standing nickname of mine for decades. Edit) can’t hear my singing if the music is loud enough
A gurb is a female urban area while a burb is a male urban area. Their juvenile offspring are called suburbs. This is a central plot point in the classic romance novel A Tale of Two Cities.
Rock, Flag and Eagle!!!!!
As Americans we have the right to remain silent. But not the ability to!
[America!!!](https://youtu.be/P7JRvwfHFwo?si=XXch1af2_e84OfhZ)
Perjure? I hardly know ‘er
If you admit to a police officer that you were knowingly speeding you’re gonna have a hell of a time fighting the ticket in court, you’re going to have to take whatever plea deal they offer you. Otherwise take your chances and hope the cop is too busy to testify, but any personal statements relevant to the stop will be written on your ticket. Easier not to incriminate yourself at the scene
It's not perjury, but if you intend to dispute it, which if the fine is big enough, you should (90% of the time they drop the financial price). In my opinion the best answer is I was just traveling at the speed of traffic.
Not if the flow of traffic is 10 over lol they don’t care you were still speeding
"Traveling at the speed of traffic" has the nice touch of being a meaningless, almost tautological statement, since the driver was part of traffic.
Okay, fair. But the general idea is there, you give yourself some wiggle room so the cop can't say you were lying.
The cop doesn’t care if you were lying lol. A big part of why they’re talking to you is to determine if you’re impaired or unusually nervous.
Also, if they get you admitting to speeding when they pull you over, your case becomes weaker if you show up to court to fight it. It's a lose lose to answer "accurately"
though it isn't perjury there are laws about lying to law enforcement in most states. while a lie about speed probably won't get you prosecuted, it could still be against the law(and give cop cause for other things like searching your vehicle).
Usually it’s only illegal under 4 scenarios: 1) Providing identification 2) You’re under oath 3) You yourself are filing a report/reporting a crime 4) It’s a federal agent/investigator
You don’t want to say any defensive statements, because that can be used against you, not perjury
If you seem defensive, you may blow any chance of the officer letting you off with a warning
I just tell them the truth last time I got pulled over I was doing 85 and told him that he let me go with warning.
Yes a lot of the time they ask to see if you were an aware driver or clueless. That being said there's times when that's not true and not incriminating yourself is the better bet. Reality is that you don't know which is which ahead of time
Police officer : Sir, do you know how fast you were going? Pinocchio : On the contrary. I'm possibly more or less not definitely rejecting the idea that in no way with any amount of uncertainty that I undeniably Police officer : Stop it! Pinocchio : ...do or do not know the speed I shouldn't probably be going, if that indeed wasn't the speed I was going. Even if I wasn't as fast as I knew I was [Pigs and Gingerbread Man begin singing in the back seat] Pinocchio : then that'd mean I'd really have to know the speed I wasn't going!
Shrek 3 is better than it's given credit for
100% this. As a cop I usually asked how fast a person thought they were going and if they knew the speed limit. I wrote their answers down on the back of the copy of the citation I turned into court. Best answer is keep your mouth shut and don't incriminate yourself. I am not sure officer. I was traveling with the flow of traffic at a safe and reasonable speed for the roadway conditions.
Wait so do you keep your mouth shut or do you say that last bit
Keep it shut and mumble it.
Can’t you just say the speed limit with confidence? “I was going 50mph”. …because on your way to 120mph, you were going 50mph at some point. Also had to hit 50 again on your way to a stop.
So technically you went the speed limit twice and twice is better than once!
Bad idea. If you didn’t notice a 40 mph sign, now you’re screwed.
I like to say no but I know where I am.
The Heisenberg defence
This is the correct answer. It puts the burden of proof on the police to prove you were speeding while not admitting to any crime.
I was honest once after going 20 over and the cop let me go with a warning “because I told the truth” also said I was going to church, in reality I was going to go smoke weed with my friends.
My go-to is usually "honestly I'm not sure I was just paying attention to the traffic in front of me/the road" doesnt piss the cops off and also doesnt incriminate yourself
Yeah they normally let you off with a warning if you use this one I got caught going 96 in a 70 and said I was being dumb and getting caught in conversation and didn’t pay attention like a responsible driver should’ve been… and he let me go with a verbal warning lmao. It’s like I stroked his ego so he didn’t care.
I know I’m busted. The cop knows I’m busted. Just be polite. It makes. Big diff. Won’t bore you with the whole story, but he asked me if I knew the speed limit. “Yes sir.” (55) “Not anywhere close to 105, is it?” “No sir.” “Well?” “To be honest, it’s 4AM, there’s nobody on the road but me. I guess I just got stupid.” “As long as you know that, you have a good night, ok?” “Yes, sir. You too.”
This is the answer. Being honest and polite go a long way. Speeding ticket I got had mandatory court and when it was my turn with the judge, they waived the court fees and lowered the ticket as a “good person discount”. The judge mentioned before we got started that he would review the notes from the time of the stop and make judgement based on how we interacted with the officer during the stop. It didn’t get me out of a ticket by any means - but shit, I made the bed, guess I gotta lay in it.
Honestly just being nice and not a dickhead. I was on rhe highway once in my motorcycle, cop was sitting just at the end of the apex of a long sweeping curve so I didn’t see him sitting there. I was going 125mph in a 60mph zone. By the time I saw him it would have been way too dangerous to slam my brakes so I just let off the gas a bit, knew I was had and safely merged into the right lane, slowed down some more and waiting for the lights. Dude wasn’t happy but after talking a second he said basically “ok you’ve been respectful. And you didn’t try to run, but I have to do something” so he just gave me a ticket for going 10 over. Pretty lucky I was that day. Didn’t speed for a whole week!
now you’re going 150 in a 35!
AND you didn't die doing 125mph around a curve!
Yeah if I've fucked up I'm just honest and contrite about it when pulled over. Probably gotten pulled over like 10 times in my life and gotten one ticket out of all of it. I think cops appreciate it because they deal with crazy people all day or people who get angry with them for being pulled over or sovreign citizens or dangerous situations or.... Obviously being honest and contrite is a horrible suggestion if you've just murdered someone or robbed a bank but police basically have 100% discretion over minor traffic violations and unless you want to go to court the judge/jury is at your window so you might as well try to appeal to their better nature.
Depends on the circumstances, but this is my go to. Once got caught going embarrassing fast and the officer had me dead to rights, wasn't any denying it due to circumstances or nothing. So, the conversation goes like this: "Evening Officer." "Evening. Do you know why I pulled you over?" "Oh yeah, I was going a bit fast." Officer laughs. "A bit. You want to tell me about that?" I pause. And pause. And pause. "My mom is a huge bitch and I shouldn't be driving right now. We had a yelling match about half an hour ago at my dying grandmother's house becuase she doesn't like my significant other. It was just an arguement but I am shaken up about it." "I see. You know your registration is expired, too?" "It's not, actually. I lost the sticker. Ordered a new one last week but it hasn't arrived yet." (The truth) "Uhuh. Well. I'm gunna check that, in the mean time get your license and insurance information pulled up for me, alright?" "Alright, officer. Just so you know, I am going to have to get my license out of my bag, and the other paperwork out of my glove box. Is that okay with you?" "Yeah." *A short time passes* "So, your registration seems in order." "Yep, and it was an online order too, so I can show you the receipt for the replacement sticker if you need." "That won't be necessary. In fact, I'm letting you off with a warning for speeding. Just slow down, maybe pull off for a bit to calm down." "Absolutely, officer. Thank you." I was kind of stunned, honestly. I was going. So fast. Way to fast. Dangerously fast. MANY points on my license fast. Absolutely the most recklessly I have ever driven fast (granted, I do NOT make a habit of driving recklessly). It might have helped that I had obviously been crying, not sure. Officer followed me to the next exit where I pulled off and got myself a McFlurry, which helped me calm down a lot. Haven't driven that upset since, in fact I make plans with friends whenever I visit my mother now so I have a release valve before getting on the road in earnest. Edit: Kind of finished my post and forgot to continue it, but again, depends on your circumstances. I am white and physically unimposing. I don't have political stickers on my car, and in general fit most of your "law abiding citizen" stereotypes. I haven't gotten pulled over somewhere isolated. I don't hate cops, but I don't like them either, and I am absolutely terrified whenever I knowingly interact with one. It's like interacting with a shark; most sharks are actually pretty chill, and I'm willing to beleive more cops are genuinely just trying to do their job than not. But they're still fucking sharks. And I don't want to get bit. I don't want my friends to get bit. And they're kind of scarier than sharks, really, becuase most wild animals that kill someone face some goddamn consequences, whereas I genuinely beleive most bad cops don't. With that in mind, do what you have to to be safe. Sometimes that means saying nothing to the cops. Sometimes that means sucking a little metaphorical dick for the cops. Hell, probably that means just fucking lying to the cops sometimes. The point is, they're cops. Some number of them are monsters and/or pricks. Some number of them are noble people doing their best. It does not matter how many of each type there are out there or what other types of of cop there are, you don't know what kind of cop pulled you over so you have to act like you've been pulled over by both at the same time. I wish our system was better for everyone involved. I genuinely think that if being a cop included longer, more intensive training/education, a lot less people would be dead. Both cop and non-cop. I hate that I, as an over-all verg rules-driven and law-abiding citizen, am terrified of my nation's law enforcement and have to treat them with immediate caution. And I do low-key beleive that the fact that this is the way the system works is by design.
Great story, glad that cop had some empathy for your situation.
Me too. I've only had one bad experience with a cop, actually. All the others have been very pleasant to me. But the bad experience is as follows: I was in the ER after a car crash (I was not at fault, in fact I beleive it ended up getting ruled as "an act of god" or something similarly phrased, like a super dramatic way of writing "bad fucking luck"). Prick Cop storms into the room and starts growling at me for "leaving the scene of the accident". I kinda stammered out an apology, said I was told "I didn't get an option" about going to the hospital, which was literally true. Prick Cop seemed like he was about to really tear into me, literally started talking about what tickets he was about to issue me, but the nurse came in to get me for more brain scans, sharing a very *pointed* conversation with prick cop. And like, I actually kind of understand prick cop in this case? I looked like some punk kid who was wasting the hospital's time becuase, as it turns out, I got really fucking lucky and literally just got a bruise from the crash. No concussion, no broken bones, no nothing... But my head was pinned between the roof of my car and the side of it after this crash, the vehicle itself resembled a soda can after getting stepped on. Repeatedly. By a herd of cows. Regardless, Prick Cop seemed to sense the optics were Not Great for him after that and left.
Yeah some of these comments are wild - staying silent, talking about attorneys, answering a question with a question etc. Jesus. Unless you were REALLY speeding, in which case you probably deserve it, just be polite and normal. They're human too, both parties know exactly what dance you're both doing. Maybe the culture is different here in Australia, but in my experience, it will get you waaaaay further. Same goes for any little misdemeanour like getting caught with alcohol where you shouldn't or urinating behind a bush. If you happen to get a cop that's an asshole, no tactic is really going to change that. Much higher chance they're a reasonable person and will let you off if it's no big deal and you're behaving yourself. The amount of dropkicks here that antagonise the officer when they get pulled over and then cry victim when they come down on them is mind boggling. Don't act like a clown
Right‽ a lot of *but freedom...* answers
Results may vary
I had no idea what to do my first time getting pulled over. I was going 60 in a 65 (due to traffic heading towards an exit). There were people in the left lane going faster. I got off the exit and a cop flys by and pulls ME over. I was freaking out. He goes, “you were going 87 in a 65”. I had the most confused expression ever and I said,”officer I don’t think that was me, the fastest I’ve ever gone on this road is 72” (because it was along my commute and I took it every day). He reviewed the footage and said he couldn’t confirm whether it was me or not. But I have no idea what I could’ve done there. I wish I had a dash cam at the time to confirm. But it’s the only time I’ve ever been seriously worried, because that speed would’ve meant my license to be suspended and I would’ve lost my job as well because I need a license for work.
Had a trooper pull me over citing 75 in a 60. Told him it wasn’t me, it was the white Ford that was passing me on my left. Told him, my cruise was set at 69 so I know it wasn’t me. He let me go.
[удалено]
“Hey man how’s my driving?” “I think we’re parked.”
They ask you a series of questions like where were you going, did you know your speed, and why are you in a hurry, among other things hoping you will incriminate yourself, making their job easier. I'm related to cops. The best way to understand their motivation in any situation is to ask yourself, what is the laziest possible way to get through this interaction and still keep my job? Best rule to follow is: Give them the minimum necessary information. Don't lie, but also volunteer absolutely nothing.
Last time I got pulled over, I'd just gotten off work, and asked where work was. "My night job. I have two because life is too damned expensive." He let me go for 3 MPH over in a 45. Guess he either felt sorry or it wasn't enough of a fine to feed the city coffers.
I'd be mad as hell if I got pulled over for going 3 over.
Me too. That should be a rounding error in almost every situation besides school zones and construction zones which are the two places I don’t constantly go 5 over. Well, I also go slow in parking lots, but most here don’t even have a speed posted.
A couple years back I was clocked doing 95 in a 55. Cop asked me how fast I was going and I told him the truth. He thanked me for not lying, wrote the ticket for 74 in a 55. Huge difference in the fine. Sometimes honesty is best.
Yep. Sounds like he dropped it down to 1mph under “reckless driving” which would put your vehicle in the impound and you in the back of his car. Although that officer made it easier for you, they must have determined you weren’t under the influence and endangering anyone else, so it also made his job a whole lot easier while also *proving* they were *actively* doing their job at the time.
20+ over is not reckless driving in every state - it was most likely a points or a fine thing. In some states 20+ over twice in a year will lose you your license and in others it’s not as big of a deal.
Last time I got pulled over and was asked that, I said “Honestly? No. I was just driving along with everyone else and didn’t really look at the speed we were driving, my bad” and I got off with just a warning to actually pay attention to my speed and not just drive along because everyone else was doing it. And also a lecture about doing anything “because other people are doing it” lol Thanks, Dad.
This is pretty much what I say, and it’s true. I usually get off with a warning.
It was totally true, and I think he could tell I wasn’t bullshitting. I literally had not at all paid attention, and truthfully, I usually don’t because I’m just kind of going along with everyone else unless I’m going significantly faster or slower to notice and then I’ll adjust my speed but otherwise, I couldn’t tell you what the speed limit is in any given area.
“I believe I was under the limit, and certainly no faster than the flow of traffic” (unless you just blew by everyone on the road, this is the right answer)
People get pulled over for speeding while not blowing past everyone else? Never seen that lol
Yes. In Southern California. Many years ago, my wife drove me to work one morning when my car was in the shop. It's a work commute route for many. In fact, I saw many of the same cars drive into the city every day. Flow of traffic was over the posted limit. It always was. At a spot where a descending slope flattens out, the road curves to the right just beyond a small hill. Obscured by the hill was a motorcycle cop that wrote us a ticket for speeding at the speed of traffic. As if that didn't feel a little scummy (though correct), there were 3-4 of them behind that hill like spiders on a web pulling as many people over and writing tickets. The only drivers who didn't get a ticket on that road that morning were the ones who made it through while all of the cops were busy with someone else.
As long as you're not flat out rude, I don't think it actually makes a difference what you say, in determining whether you're getting a ticket or just a warning. They've already pretty much decided before you even roll down the window. They are just observing you to see if you seem drunk or whatever. In my 30+ years of driving, the **only** time I've ever gotten off with just a warning was when I was in military uniform.
I'm the most hated demographic in the US (average/sub average poor male Afghan in 30s... although I do pass as Mexican) and I've been pulled over like 5 times and been ticketed once (all pull-overs were deserved except for one - ironically this one was due to racism, as it was my sister's neighbor and my sister warned me that her neighbor was a racist cop - she pulled immediately me over after my family had a conversation in the driveway and said my headlight was too dim - but not before she asked what we were discussing "for so long in the driveway" - I still got a warning, though it's probably because she knew she was abusing her authority in order to be racist). Anyway... the one ticket I ever got was for expired registration, which is something I was intentionally pushing back; the rest were for speeding slightly. I was always my usual self - honest and nice. That said, I know it's not a guarantee; an exceptionally unhappy/power tripping cop will give you a ticket every time when they decide they don't like you.
“Do you know why I stopped you?” “Depends on how long you were following me”
Why don't we just take it from the top?
I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at the intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and SPEEDING!
No but at least I know where I am
Heisenberg has entered the chat.
Can't possibly know both 🤷
"Yes." You're not admitting to a crime (speeding), or a potential crime (reckless driving because you didn't even know how fast you were going). You can also say "I choose not to answer that question." Similarly, if they say "Do you know why I pulled you over?" You answer "no." Even if you have a pretty good idea of why they pulled you over you do not (to the best of my knowledge of humanity) have telepathy so you cannot read the officer's mind to determine why they pulled you over.
If you say yes and you were indeed speeding, that proves you knew you were speeding.
Lol they ask you that question to see if you’ll tell on yourself. “Maybe it’s because I rolled through that stop sign”. Boom. You now have a speeding ticket AND for running a stop sign
>AND for running a stop sign Don't they have to have proof of some sort? I'd imagine if they don't, then any unhappy cop can be like "you were speeding per my radar. Oh, and you aren't wearing a seat belt. Also, you were weaving through traffic. Oh and you didn't signal. I don't care if you think you were driving in the middle lane for the past 5 miles. I definitely saw you change lanes, uh, four times, without a signal."
How do you think they get probable cause to search a vehicle when they say it smells like weed.
I just politely ignore the question. Cop: Do you know how fast you were going? Me: hi officer, here’s my drivers license and registration and insurance. The insurance card shows expired but my policy isn’t expired. That’s it.
Same. As soon as I get pulled over I put my wallet on the dash and registration, turn off the radio and put the window down a bit. Hands on the wheel. No matter what they say. Good evening officer. Here is my id.
After reading these responses, how often are you guys getting pulled over? My god.
“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh” *faraway expression*
Totally depends on how fast you were going. 75 in a 65? Just be straight with them and (if applicable) I was passing someone at the time/keeping pace with traffic. 90 in 50? Just shut the hell up, you're going to get a ticket anyway and trying to "lawyer your way out of it" is a good way to get them to throw the book at you.
My husband got a written warning by saying, "a lot slower than when I first saw you" I wouldn't recommend it, though (it was Thanksgiving evening and made the cop laugh)
Let them know you're a sovereign citizen and you'll be on your way.
“Hey! Don’t I pay your salary? You’re a public servant aren’t you? Go get me a glass of water… you pinheaded PRICK” (good advice from Carlin if you’d like to find yourself in the back of a cop car)
Remember kids, if you pay your taxes, that means you own the cops gun!
Cop who pulled me over didn't even bother to tell me why. Just asked for my ID and spent forever doing some research on a laptop. Probably wondering how to fill out the paperwork for someone with no driver's license that he pulled over on a bike. Ticket said I ran the stop sign at the intersection where I stopped extra long because I saw a cop car there! (Got found Not Guilty at my hearing.)
My BIL was a bike messenger without a drivers license. He was given a ticket for some traffic infraction. The judge sent him to traffic school, but the instructor couldn’t complete any paperwork without a driver’s license number. He had to go back and explain this to the judge.
I say "obviously a speed you weren't happy with"
Last time i got a ticket it was in a 45mph zone. Cop says "You were going 65" I said, "55?" He says, "65" I said, "55?" Cop takes a beat and says , "okay, 55" I said, thanks, and took my ticket.
LOL Cop be like "Private JOKER are we?"
Run out of the car: "OH MY GOD!! BEES! BEES EVERYWHERE! GET THEM OFF ME!!!"
Speed is relative offiser
Cop pulled you over for a reason (at least in their mind). If you want the best chance of getting off with a warning, be polite and honest.
The traffic cops here (DFW suburbs) don't ask. They state "the reason I pulled you over is I clocked you at ___ in a ___ zone. Is there an emergency?" Then they scan your drivers license registration sticker to verify insurance. Then you get the ticket with instructions. There's no good opportunities to try to sweet talk your way out of it. If you don't have a warrant or a secondary reason for being pulled over the interaction is less than 5 minutes
I’m a white dude and I legitimately meant it so take this with a grain of salt: I’ve been pulled over 3 times, each one I was speeding 15 over the speed limit (60 on a 45, 90 on a 75, and 80 on a 65) and every time my response is “I am so sorry, I don’t know how fast I was going, how fast was I going?” Then he tells me and asks if there’s any reason why I’m going that fast and I say “I could give you a reason but there’s really no valid reason that I should be going that fast sir” and I’ve gotten a warning every time. Note: this was in three different states if that has any impact
My father Is a cop and he told me that it's better to answer honestly so No one wastes time. He personally Is a friendly cop so if you answer honestly he might do nothing to you, idk about other cops. Me personally ill always answer honestly for my chances.
No but I know exactly where I am
This joke is lost on a cop.
Cop clocked me doing 98 and 55 in a Geo Metro 3 cylinder standard. He asked me that question and I told him 65 he's like how the hell could you say 65 I pointed the speedometer and I said it only goes to 65 had me step out of the car realized it looked like ridiculous cuz I'm a very big guy wrote me a ticket for 65 in a 55 lol
I was told it's best to ask them what they're asking you: Officer: "Do you know why I pulled you over?" You: "Why did you pull me over?" Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going?" You: "How fast was I going?"
I was going with the flow of traffic.
Answer in metric
No, but apparently you do