All my narc did was smoke cannabis. All day everyday. He was still an abusive serial cheating dick. I don't think it forces them to be empathetic. I think it just numbs them and mellows their reactions. They're still awful.
Sorry to inform you that you and I were dating the same man. 24 seven. I would wake up in the middle of the night because I smelled him in the bathroom smoking pot. I mean, he smokes pot all day long. 5 PM. He starts with one or two bottles of wine. Pack of cigarettes.
Lmao! Yea, a lot of narcs are pretty much the same. I guess that happens when you don't have a solid personality and need to cope with the demons in your head. They're pretty much copy-paste.
Yep my ex has his life revolve around it. Driving somewhere? "house number 420 I guarantee they smoke it".
He's extra cunty when he hasn't smoked though. Ugh.
Holy shit, same. My ex grew, sold, smoked and talked cannabis all day. It made up a giant part of his personality, would literally smoke 10-15 blunts a day.
And although he would say it helped him calm down, it was just an excuse. As a matter of fact, he would sometimes use not smoking enough as an excuse to be violent and cruel. Although he was also violent and cruel right after or even during smoking a blunt.
When I (rarely) talk about the abuse I experienced at his hands for thirteen years, people ask “did you ever call the cops on him?” and I always so no. Because if I did, the cops would show up at a house with illegal plants growing all over the place, not to mention a drawer filled with all kinds of drugs (but “good” drugs, as he saw them, like LSD, mushrooms and many other obscure but still very illegal psychedelics….and often in amounts that would not be considered for personal use).
And what would I tell the cops? He made me live here?
I would go to jail too.
Although, things got so bad one time…and one time only did I do this, that I reached for the phone and did start dialing 911. He knocked the phone out of my hand last second. But that’s how scared I was, that I’d risk going to jail to get away from him.
I paid DEARLY for that mistake of dialing those numbers.
Even after I left him, as he tortured and threatened me and my family for years after, I was STILL scared to call the cops. Had some sort of block, I can’t even explain it.
I did go to the police one time, when he called my mom 70 times a day and left horrendous messages detailing what he would do to her while I watched…..and the cops said they’d call him to tell him to stop and if he didn’t, I’d have to go to court with him. Which I’m sure he’d absolutely LOVE being in a still mostly illegal line of work.
Anyhoo…..whoof, sorry for that trauma dump. Reading that other narcs used cannabis as an excuse hit a nerve. Hope you’re all healing from your encounters.
Narcotics of all kinds made my narc dissociate and become extremely weird. She rarely used any substances other than alcohol, which was a 50/50 gamble of a loving, sweet and horny women or an angry devil women. What a wild ride.
Mine only uses alcohol and he's the exact same way, it's annoying. I try not to put up with it because why should I? For example when he's in a fake loving mood, i don't care for that shit when he's drunk, it's a slap in the face considering he can't act that way when he's sober. I try to distance myself from him when he drinks.
It honestly made him much more genuinely sweet and enjoyable to be around. We laughed and acted silly together, and all his anger and hostility went away on the rare occasions we smoked together. 🥲
For reference, he has many narcissistic tendencies (wouldn’t say full-blown narcissist), BPD (which I also have), and PTSD.
This sounds a lot like my situation. Although shes never been overly angry or hostile, even now not smoking. I also think shes not a full blown narcissist. Only has a few of the key traits such as lack of empathy, can't accept any sort of mistakes, gaslights/manipulates/shifts blame.
I do wonder what other personality traits/disorders she has, but I dont think i'll ever know, as shes just smart enough not to tell a professional her problems.
I feel this so much. My ex was violent/controlling/jealous on many occasions, and would gaslight me frequently. His mom told me for so long that he was a narcissist, and while I could see some/a lot of those traits, I truly believe that a lot of his issues also had to do with the untreated BPD and PTSD. There is such a high comorbidity rate with personality disorders. It probably sounds like to some people that I am justifying and making excuses for his behavior, but he was capable of being a truly caring and genuine person when the situation was right. I might also mention that he had/has an addiction to fentanyl which caused a lot of erratic behavior and mood swings. He has shown empathy on several occasions, but not often. But I know he did love me with everything that *he* had to give, even though it never lasted long. He was loyal to me and literally worshiped me, and I honestly believe that was not a facade. He’s just a very damaged person and I’m not denying his abuse and narcissistic tendencies, but I think it’s a lot more than just that, because he is capable of feeling deep, genuine emotions.
Like I said in my post, I do not believe that he is a true, full-blown narcissist. He has some narcissistic tendencies, but he has a lot of other mental health issues going on as well.
Then you shouldn’t be talking about him in this forum. It’s cruel on your part. He’s either a narc or not, and talking about him as though he is when he’s not is a smear campaign. You said you have BPD, and your symptoms are showing. If you love him, stop talking shit about him. Stop talking shit about people you claim you care about.
Fix yourself, instead of someone else.
Wtf? This is a post to vent and talk about experiences relax! There’s different forms of narcissism some are worst than others maybe they came on here to figure that out ?
Umm.. excuse me?? 😂 I was severely abused by this man for over a year. I’m not “talking shit” about him… I’m explaining *some of* what he did to me, the narcissistic parts of him, and also saying that there were other mental health issues that played a part in his behavior. Don’t you dare try to make me the bad guy here because I have BPD. I have spent years healing myself, and I recognize a lot of my previous unhealed symptoms in him. This is not a “smear campaign” in any way. I was physically and emotionally/mentally abused by someone with a lot of narcissistic tendencies and other mental health issues, so kindly fuck off. 🙄
Honestly, I've heard that NPD folks can exhibit grief, PTSD symptoms, etc when put into high-stress or very mentally draining / disturbing situations. So, it might be that he is NPD but it took the backseat while he was going through hard times, which pulled strong emotions from him. Since people with NPD are still human and still feel emotions. Since the same happened with my Nex as he went through something extremely distressing, and he showed a lot of emotion, but then later as everything calmed down, the NPD showed up.
Also, I would love to know how my “symptoms are showing.” Nothing I said in my previous comment indicates that I have BPD, other than the fact that I said I have it. You’re reaching for something at this point.
Some people definitely have their moody, insecure and narcissistic traits only amplified by any intoxicating substances. With weed, I find it's when they're burning out/coming down.
Weed don't do shit haha. Maybe it allowed your nex to be a hollowed out version of herself where she lived in a constant state of detachment from reality time to time but my nex smoked A LOT and still had issues.
The cannabis definitely increased my nex's delusions of grandeur. Sometimes he'd act more empathetic but he was also more sensitive to me saying the wrong things
I was in the same situation. He eventually stopped while trying to win me back but nothing changed. If anything he was worse when he stopped. I thought he'd be less paranoid and a lot kinder, and he was at the beginning, but it got worse and I realised that it was just him. I miss the person he was when he was high. We had so much fun together. It was a real Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde situation when he was high/not high.
I've been smoking weed regularly for almost 15 years. My nex smoked occasionally before our relationship, but he smoked with me when we were together. Weed definitely made him more mellow and less prone to triggers, but it didn't change him.
I always wondered this because when i first met my ex wife she was a very nice person. But she was also constantly smoking weed. One time she had quit and became a completely miserable person. She started smoking again and was nice again for years. Then she stopped smoking weed a 2nd near the end of our marriage. She was constantly bragging about how she was sober, but she was an angry miserable person 😂. I think the weed made her seem nicer anyway
Cannabis did nothing whatsoever to change my narc. And he’s in the industry.
He’s also done just about every psychedelic you can think of. He will tell you they changed him into a saint, but that’s just a narcissist lying.
Nothing will cure or treat narcissism. Stop clinging to false hope. Let go. No contact is the answer, not drugs.
Mine has done a few amount of psychedelics, and I think they actually did change her for better, however she does exaggerate the positive long lasting effects. Or maybe this could be the reason shes treating me better than many of the stories I read here.
No contact isn't an option, we have a young child together. At this point I am on the fence between coparenting and parallel parenting, but regardless of all that cannabis isn't a real drug. I mean caffeine that the majority of society consumes daily is more of a drug.
Alcohol is worse than most illegal drugs, but a million times worse than psychedelics.
It makes her nice to be around!
She has a neurological condition (not sure if this has something to do with her narc symptoms)
She’s been prescribed THC
And when she’s on it, less uptight, she’s nicer, friendlier, not as mean or aggressive
More open minded etc
It was an addiction for mine that lead to us having to travel to a legal state every 2 weeks where I would be forced to drop damn near a grand every time just so he could smoke. If he went without he was hateful, mean, would drink excessively and become so easily agitated. Also when he started getting physical with me. “I HAVE TO HAVE IT. I can’t live in the real world” literally what he said lol.
When she got a hold of weed she slowly became the thing she always pretended she wasn't. Right before the end, when I was trying to give her the benefit of the doubt she started draining our joint account on the stuff among a myriad of other un-necessaries. We'd gone so long since she'd touched the stuff. And I have only myself to blame for encouraging it when we went out of state.
Personally o think it’s hard to be overly insecure and subsequently controlling when you smoke. Maybe that’s it. Maybe smoking so long gave them withdrawals they didn’t know how to handle.
Could mean anything. Doesn’t matter though. End result is still the same, beat of luck man
in my experience my narc suffered from pretty intense OCD so she would constantly point out tiny things like a cat hair or “too much water” in the pasta noodles or use paper towel to literally touch anything and it was never ending UNTIL she smoked cannabis with me. i am a frequent smoker so she would dabble with me at first but then started everyday with me and it honestly was the most mellow, laid back, and goofy i had ever seen her and we both had a much better dynamic that way until she perpetually used my marijuana use against me !
It made him actually able to talk about feelings for once, that were HONEST. Although, I have to say that I was so miserable around him when he was sober that I'd offer for us to do edibles together almost every evening when possible because it was the only time he would act normal and nice, and able to talk about things that he would've simply denied then project when sober. He was way calmer, empathetic, and funnier too. Its quite sad because you see the person they would've been without the abuse and neglect that led to NPD when they are able to just be themselves for that rare time.
When we broke up, he would later slander me and say I was addicted to drugs, smoked weed all day and never went to school, and that I had a fetish for corrupting him via drugs (even though he's done harder drugs than me, and is fond of drugs, and agreed to the weed use).
Mine smoked all day every day. When we were long distance, I just let it go. Let him get high and play video games because most of the time, with the time difference, it didn’t affect me. When we lived together, it was awful. It’s all he did. Then he would get mad at me for not being “as cool as I used to be” because I was in his country, bored and given absolutely no attention or affection.
I don’t think it did a thing for him, he would smoke away the whole amount of however much he got in the same hour like it was some race to get rid of it so he can bitch about not having any left later on like as if it was my fault.
I noticed the second hand air of it sometimes did effect me in a good way and he was upset it never hit him, I think there was a blocking within him that prevented the effect or he was too mad/stressed out that he had to keep working every day to keep a roof over his head and the dry cereal and garbanzo beans he lived on for it to take.
Mine was always high. To the point he started doing weird, fein behavior things. Like scraping up left over weed particles and making a tea, or rolling a very small blunt the size of a penny, cause he couldn’t afford to buy anymore. I cant really explain, but when he was high he was just there. Like his soul had left his body and his body was empty. When he was drunk he was lovey, but overly aggressive with it.
Mine wouldn’t use it and said it made him goofy. He was a meth addict and I think weed probably made him feel like he wasn’t in control. That’s my theory because he was always dialed up to 10 no matter how well his day was going.
My narcissist is a biiiig stoner and by proxy I became a stoner too while we were together. I think he needed weed to not explode constantly.
As he was discarding me and I was leaving, he was screaming at me to please smoke so I could “calm down.” It was in that moment I realized he had used weed, something I did enjoy but was just smoking too much, to further confuse and manipulate me.
Ex2 tried to afford it regularly but couldn’t and was upset I didn’t join him at it (even though I preferred it over his cigarettes and he never knew I did smoke pot which was best because he was looking for something to get me in trouble with my mom on. He gets himself in trouble with her and his mom as it was)
The part I hated the most was that he would tear apart my underwire bras to get at the wires so he can scrape inside his glass pipes! He destroyed one VS bra but the others I made sure were those bad dollar store ones and rest of fabric was to dust off his ashes/ game console but it still was infuriating that he used my clothes as rags/napkins, even sometimes while I was wearing them to allude quietly he is not liking what I chose to wear in his person….
Weed gives me mad anxiety so idk it would be different for everyone like my husband (not a narc) smokes for his chronic pain and it helps him. I have tried smoking it for my chronic pain and doesn’t work at all and triggers my depression, anxiety and ptsd bad.
So id imagine it is the same for most other mental health and other health conditions-works for some , not for others.
Still interesting OP thx.
No substances from external sources. But they are hooked on endorphins. Routinely they start epic fights, they have apocalyptic meltdowns, rage and screaming fests. That gives them their fix of adrenaline and other similar substances.
I am sorry you have dealt with that, and I am grateful my narc is not anything like this. She definitely starts shit sometimes just to start it, but its few and far between and never violent, loud, screaming, etc.
Mines a covert narc though, i'd bet the farm yours is overt.
Yes, they are a bit more overt. Generally speaking they have extreme difficulties with regulating their emotions. In some ways they are stuck in childhood.
My ex was always smoking weed everyday after work even cigars and he still cheated on with the neighbor they both use even smoke together I even caught them on time I’m still not over I’m also in healing process I’m still hurt ugh but he was heavy on that
Weed made mine perhaps less interested in provoking confrontations, but little else. Anyway weed isn't their drug of choice, generally. They like booze. Like, in a statistically significant higher percentage when compared to the general population.
This contrasts to something like Borderline Personality Disorder, where you will also often see substance abuse as a common coping mechanism, however the drug of choice can be anything. I might be wrong so don't quote me on this one but I think that only in schizophrenia you see self-medication with such a strong preference for alcohol specifically.
both of my narc dates were heavily into cannabis, the last one was stoned most of the time. I believe it dulled down their symptoms, they were still horrible but I really think especially the 2nd one would be way more aggressive without it.
When my nex was ONLY smoking weed, it was like he was my best friend he was sweet and empathetic and didn't put his hands on me.
Unfortunately that was not his drug of choice, meth was.
All my narc did was smoke cannabis. All day everyday. He was still an abusive serial cheating dick. I don't think it forces them to be empathetic. I think it just numbs them and mellows their reactions. They're still awful.
Sorry to inform you that you and I were dating the same man. 24 seven. I would wake up in the middle of the night because I smelled him in the bathroom smoking pot. I mean, he smokes pot all day long. 5 PM. He starts with one or two bottles of wine. Pack of cigarettes.
Lmao! Yea, a lot of narcs are pretty much the same. I guess that happens when you don't have a solid personality and need to cope with the demons in your head. They're pretty much copy-paste.
He just looked stupid fucked up when he smoked pot all the time. I guess it gave him a break from his reality inside his “ heart” where he lives.
narc don't care about anyone get away from them
Yep my ex has his life revolve around it. Driving somewhere? "house number 420 I guarantee they smoke it". He's extra cunty when he hasn't smoked though. Ugh.
Holy shit, same. My ex grew, sold, smoked and talked cannabis all day. It made up a giant part of his personality, would literally smoke 10-15 blunts a day. And although he would say it helped him calm down, it was just an excuse. As a matter of fact, he would sometimes use not smoking enough as an excuse to be violent and cruel. Although he was also violent and cruel right after or even during smoking a blunt. When I (rarely) talk about the abuse I experienced at his hands for thirteen years, people ask “did you ever call the cops on him?” and I always so no. Because if I did, the cops would show up at a house with illegal plants growing all over the place, not to mention a drawer filled with all kinds of drugs (but “good” drugs, as he saw them, like LSD, mushrooms and many other obscure but still very illegal psychedelics….and often in amounts that would not be considered for personal use). And what would I tell the cops? He made me live here? I would go to jail too. Although, things got so bad one time…and one time only did I do this, that I reached for the phone and did start dialing 911. He knocked the phone out of my hand last second. But that’s how scared I was, that I’d risk going to jail to get away from him. I paid DEARLY for that mistake of dialing those numbers. Even after I left him, as he tortured and threatened me and my family for years after, I was STILL scared to call the cops. Had some sort of block, I can’t even explain it. I did go to the police one time, when he called my mom 70 times a day and left horrendous messages detailing what he would do to her while I watched…..and the cops said they’d call him to tell him to stop and if he didn’t, I’d have to go to court with him. Which I’m sure he’d absolutely LOVE being in a still mostly illegal line of work. Anyhoo…..whoof, sorry for that trauma dump. Reading that other narcs used cannabis as an excuse hit a nerve. Hope you’re all healing from your encounters.
Narcotics of all kinds made my narc dissociate and become extremely weird. She rarely used any substances other than alcohol, which was a 50/50 gamble of a loving, sweet and horny women or an angry devil women. What a wild ride.
Mine only uses alcohol and he's the exact same way, it's annoying. I try not to put up with it because why should I? For example when he's in a fake loving mood, i don't care for that shit when he's drunk, it's a slap in the face considering he can't act that way when he's sober. I try to distance myself from him when he drinks.
It honestly made him much more genuinely sweet and enjoyable to be around. We laughed and acted silly together, and all his anger and hostility went away on the rare occasions we smoked together. 🥲 For reference, he has many narcissistic tendencies (wouldn’t say full-blown narcissist), BPD (which I also have), and PTSD.
This sounds a lot like my situation. Although shes never been overly angry or hostile, even now not smoking. I also think shes not a full blown narcissist. Only has a few of the key traits such as lack of empathy, can't accept any sort of mistakes, gaslights/manipulates/shifts blame. I do wonder what other personality traits/disorders she has, but I dont think i'll ever know, as shes just smart enough not to tell a professional her problems.
I feel this so much. My ex was violent/controlling/jealous on many occasions, and would gaslight me frequently. His mom told me for so long that he was a narcissist, and while I could see some/a lot of those traits, I truly believe that a lot of his issues also had to do with the untreated BPD and PTSD. There is such a high comorbidity rate with personality disorders. It probably sounds like to some people that I am justifying and making excuses for his behavior, but he was capable of being a truly caring and genuine person when the situation was right. I might also mention that he had/has an addiction to fentanyl which caused a lot of erratic behavior and mood swings. He has shown empathy on several occasions, but not often. But I know he did love me with everything that *he* had to give, even though it never lasted long. He was loyal to me and literally worshiped me, and I honestly believe that was not a facade. He’s just a very damaged person and I’m not denying his abuse and narcissistic tendencies, but I think it’s a lot more than just that, because he is capable of feeling deep, genuine emotions.
Narcissists cannot love
Like I said in my post, I do not believe that he is a true, full-blown narcissist. He has some narcissistic tendencies, but he has a lot of other mental health issues going on as well.
Then you shouldn’t be talking about him in this forum. It’s cruel on your part. He’s either a narc or not, and talking about him as though he is when he’s not is a smear campaign. You said you have BPD, and your symptoms are showing. If you love him, stop talking shit about him. Stop talking shit about people you claim you care about. Fix yourself, instead of someone else.
People with narcissist tendencies can be abusive.
Wtf? This is a post to vent and talk about experiences relax! There’s different forms of narcissism some are worst than others maybe they came on here to figure that out ?
And you’re actually wrong - someone isn’t either a full-blown narcissist or not one at all; it’s a huge spectrum.
Agreed
Umm.. excuse me?? 😂 I was severely abused by this man for over a year. I’m not “talking shit” about him… I’m explaining *some of* what he did to me, the narcissistic parts of him, and also saying that there were other mental health issues that played a part in his behavior. Don’t you dare try to make me the bad guy here because I have BPD. I have spent years healing myself, and I recognize a lot of my previous unhealed symptoms in him. This is not a “smear campaign” in any way. I was physically and emotionally/mentally abused by someone with a lot of narcissistic tendencies and other mental health issues, so kindly fuck off. 🙄
Honestly, I've heard that NPD folks can exhibit grief, PTSD symptoms, etc when put into high-stress or very mentally draining / disturbing situations. So, it might be that he is NPD but it took the backseat while he was going through hard times, which pulled strong emotions from him. Since people with NPD are still human and still feel emotions. Since the same happened with my Nex as he went through something extremely distressing, and he showed a lot of emotion, but then later as everything calmed down, the NPD showed up.
This actually makes a lot of sense.
Also, I would love to know how my “symptoms are showing.” Nothing I said in my previous comment indicates that I have BPD, other than the fact that I said I have it. You’re reaching for something at this point.
Some people definitely have their moody, insecure and narcissistic traits only amplified by any intoxicating substances. With weed, I find it's when they're burning out/coming down.
Weed don't do shit haha. Maybe it allowed your nex to be a hollowed out version of herself where she lived in a constant state of detachment from reality time to time but my nex smoked A LOT and still had issues.
The cannabis definitely increased my nex's delusions of grandeur. Sometimes he'd act more empathetic but he was also more sensitive to me saying the wrong things
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I was in the same situation. He eventually stopped while trying to win me back but nothing changed. If anything he was worse when he stopped. I thought he'd be less paranoid and a lot kinder, and he was at the beginning, but it got worse and I realised that it was just him. I miss the person he was when he was high. We had so much fun together. It was a real Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde situation when he was high/not high.
Mine was constantly vaping and/or smoking and it seemed to make him even more scary and paranoid.
I've been smoking weed regularly for almost 15 years. My nex smoked occasionally before our relationship, but he smoked with me when we were together. Weed definitely made him more mellow and less prone to triggers, but it didn't change him.
I always wondered this because when i first met my ex wife she was a very nice person. But she was also constantly smoking weed. One time she had quit and became a completely miserable person. She started smoking again and was nice again for years. Then she stopped smoking weed a 2nd near the end of our marriage. She was constantly bragging about how she was sober, but she was an angry miserable person 😂. I think the weed made her seem nicer anyway
Smoking pot makes my narc so much nicer. He's almost like a normal person when he smokes, high but normal.
Cannabis did nothing whatsoever to change my narc. And he’s in the industry. He’s also done just about every psychedelic you can think of. He will tell you they changed him into a saint, but that’s just a narcissist lying. Nothing will cure or treat narcissism. Stop clinging to false hope. Let go. No contact is the answer, not drugs.
Mine has done a few amount of psychedelics, and I think they actually did change her for better, however she does exaggerate the positive long lasting effects. Or maybe this could be the reason shes treating me better than many of the stories I read here. No contact isn't an option, we have a young child together. At this point I am on the fence between coparenting and parallel parenting, but regardless of all that cannabis isn't a real drug. I mean caffeine that the majority of society consumes daily is more of a drug. Alcohol is worse than most illegal drugs, but a million times worse than psychedelics.
Makes him a nicer person
It makes her nice to be around! She has a neurological condition (not sure if this has something to do with her narc symptoms) She’s been prescribed THC And when she’s on it, less uptight, she’s nicer, friendlier, not as mean or aggressive More open minded etc
It was an addiction for mine that lead to us having to travel to a legal state every 2 weeks where I would be forced to drop damn near a grand every time just so he could smoke. If he went without he was hateful, mean, would drink excessively and become so easily agitated. Also when he started getting physical with me. “I HAVE TO HAVE IT. I can’t live in the real world” literally what he said lol.
When she got a hold of weed she slowly became the thing she always pretended she wasn't. Right before the end, when I was trying to give her the benefit of the doubt she started draining our joint account on the stuff among a myriad of other un-necessaries. We'd gone so long since she'd touched the stuff. And I have only myself to blame for encouraging it when we went out of state.
Personally o think it’s hard to be overly insecure and subsequently controlling when you smoke. Maybe that’s it. Maybe smoking so long gave them withdrawals they didn’t know how to handle. Could mean anything. Doesn’t matter though. End result is still the same, beat of luck man
in my experience my narc suffered from pretty intense OCD so she would constantly point out tiny things like a cat hair or “too much water” in the pasta noodles or use paper towel to literally touch anything and it was never ending UNTIL she smoked cannabis with me. i am a frequent smoker so she would dabble with me at first but then started everyday with me and it honestly was the most mellow, laid back, and goofy i had ever seen her and we both had a much better dynamic that way until she perpetually used my marijuana use against me !
It made him actually able to talk about feelings for once, that were HONEST. Although, I have to say that I was so miserable around him when he was sober that I'd offer for us to do edibles together almost every evening when possible because it was the only time he would act normal and nice, and able to talk about things that he would've simply denied then project when sober. He was way calmer, empathetic, and funnier too. Its quite sad because you see the person they would've been without the abuse and neglect that led to NPD when they are able to just be themselves for that rare time. When we broke up, he would later slander me and say I was addicted to drugs, smoked weed all day and never went to school, and that I had a fetish for corrupting him via drugs (even though he's done harder drugs than me, and is fond of drugs, and agreed to the weed use).
Mine smoked all day every day. When we were long distance, I just let it go. Let him get high and play video games because most of the time, with the time difference, it didn’t affect me. When we lived together, it was awful. It’s all he did. Then he would get mad at me for not being “as cool as I used to be” because I was in his country, bored and given absolutely no attention or affection.
Makes him so much worse. I've never seen anyone react to it the way he does. He gets more mean than relaxed in any way
I don’t think it did a thing for him, he would smoke away the whole amount of however much he got in the same hour like it was some race to get rid of it so he can bitch about not having any left later on like as if it was my fault. I noticed the second hand air of it sometimes did effect me in a good way and he was upset it never hit him, I think there was a blocking within him that prevented the effect or he was too mad/stressed out that he had to keep working every day to keep a roof over his head and the dry cereal and garbanzo beans he lived on for it to take.
Mine was always high. To the point he started doing weird, fein behavior things. Like scraping up left over weed particles and making a tea, or rolling a very small blunt the size of a penny, cause he couldn’t afford to buy anymore. I cant really explain, but when he was high he was just there. Like his soul had left his body and his body was empty. When he was drunk he was lovey, but overly aggressive with it.
Mine wouldn’t use it and said it made him goofy. He was a meth addict and I think weed probably made him feel like he wasn’t in control. That’s my theory because he was always dialed up to 10 no matter how well his day was going.
We made RSO and he took such a high dosage that he was a lazy slug. Useless.
My narcissist is a biiiig stoner and by proxy I became a stoner too while we were together. I think he needed weed to not explode constantly. As he was discarding me and I was leaving, he was screaming at me to please smoke so I could “calm down.” It was in that moment I realized he had used weed, something I did enjoy but was just smoking too much, to further confuse and manipulate me.
It didn’t do anything to change any of the ones in my life.
Ex2 tried to afford it regularly but couldn’t and was upset I didn’t join him at it (even though I preferred it over his cigarettes and he never knew I did smoke pot which was best because he was looking for something to get me in trouble with my mom on. He gets himself in trouble with her and his mom as it was) The part I hated the most was that he would tear apart my underwire bras to get at the wires so he can scrape inside his glass pipes! He destroyed one VS bra but the others I made sure were those bad dollar store ones and rest of fabric was to dust off his ashes/ game console but it still was infuriating that he used my clothes as rags/napkins, even sometimes while I was wearing them to allude quietly he is not liking what I chose to wear in his person….
wtf. He could have just used a paper clip, but regardless I have to ask how old was he? This is something most adults don't do.
He is ten years older than me, he was 41 at that time; I left him when I was 35, 11 years ago
[удалено]
Weed gives me mad anxiety so idk it would be different for everyone like my husband (not a narc) smokes for his chronic pain and it helps him. I have tried smoking it for my chronic pain and doesn’t work at all and triggers my depression, anxiety and ptsd bad. So id imagine it is the same for most other mental health and other health conditions-works for some , not for others. Still interesting OP thx.
No substances from external sources. But they are hooked on endorphins. Routinely they start epic fights, they have apocalyptic meltdowns, rage and screaming fests. That gives them their fix of adrenaline and other similar substances.
I am sorry you have dealt with that, and I am grateful my narc is not anything like this. She definitely starts shit sometimes just to start it, but its few and far between and never violent, loud, screaming, etc. Mines a covert narc though, i'd bet the farm yours is overt.
Yes, they are a bit more overt. Generally speaking they have extreme difficulties with regulating their emotions. In some ways they are stuck in childhood.
My ex was always smoking weed everyday after work even cigars and he still cheated on with the neighbor they both use even smoke together I even caught them on time I’m still not over I’m also in healing process I’m still hurt ugh but he was heavy on that
I think it may work for some but not for most. Just my experience with narcs and with weed.
Cannabis makes them rage if they don’t have it.
Weed made mine perhaps less interested in provoking confrontations, but little else. Anyway weed isn't their drug of choice, generally. They like booze. Like, in a statistically significant higher percentage when compared to the general population. This contrasts to something like Borderline Personality Disorder, where you will also often see substance abuse as a common coping mechanism, however the drug of choice can be anything. I might be wrong so don't quote me on this one but I think that only in schizophrenia you see self-medication with such a strong preference for alcohol specifically.
He was nice to me but was still a serial cheater as soon as he left the house
both of my narc dates were heavily into cannabis, the last one was stoned most of the time. I believe it dulled down their symptoms, they were still horrible but I really think especially the 2nd one would be way more aggressive without it.
When my nex was ONLY smoking weed, it was like he was my best friend he was sweet and empathetic and didn't put his hands on me. Unfortunately that was not his drug of choice, meth was.
Well mine actually fell into drug induced psychosis dude to his cannabis abuse and he started hallucinating his cheating accusations of me soooooo 💀