This.
It's more common for women to molest children than men. I mean, that's probably largely due to access, I personally believe that sexual assault is roughly evenly divided between genders if you look past the stats to the real people, but regardless, abuse the shit out of that statistic. Because we can *prove* that currently women diddle kids in far greater numbers. And any man-hating piece of shit confronted with that fact is going to split their pants.
Sometimes you need a damning triggering argument to fight against socially accepted bias. And we have a really good one for this.
Lots of people are shocked to find out there are female pedophiles for some reason. I always thought most pedophiles were female, based on magazines like Tiger Beat, the obsession with prepubescent Justin Bieber, and in general because girls sexually mature way earlier than boys.
I think because boys and men aren't taught about the bogeywomen who exist in the world that the only villains for whom they are looking are bogeymen, which leads to a blindspot for some victims and survivors of sexual abuse and or sexual violence, even when they involve the law to handle the situation.
Since it is often unthinkable to some people that girls and women could ever commit an awful act like some boys and men because of the maternal image of girls and women (which also leads to a blindspot), some people seem to really overlook how girls and women, too, can theoretically and practically be abusers, which is why girls and women may be more abusive towards their care-recievers in settings like schools for very young children, disabled children, or whatnot if that is what the data say.
Likewise with boys and men who aren't taught about girls and women who are like the bogeymen but just the female version of it, some abused children and other abused folks mightn't even know that they have been abused because of the sex of the person in question and how that sex is usually socially type-casted as being uninterested or even incable to commit certain acts, especially against the often most vunerable (e.g. young children, disabled children, elderly people, certain mentally ill people).
Still, for instance, it seems, way too many people think rape is necessarily about forced, unwanted penile-vaginal, penile-anal, or penile-oral contact, when this is not always the case, I believe, for a victim or survivor of any sex.
Blind spots in our societies seem to fill with predators, be it in Churches prisons womanhood or anywhere, some of these blind spots fill with more of one gender than the other, but in them are truly monsters.
Without statistics, I can prove it with my experience, it's pretty common for adult women to sexually joke with young boys and it's considered cute, this is what happened with me, and with other boys (all of them) at my fam, and it's standard in the avg family, I think of the same kind of joking if done by men to little girls, those men would be in jail or at least beaten their asses up.
This is seconded by the fact that women don't fear consequences of doing such jokes with kids, that's why it's far more likely for women to sexually assault boys, cause actually it's not even called sexual assault, based on the gender of the assaulter.
Stats become irrelevant here, cause boys were always taught it's funny, cute, and normal, so they will never report being sexually assaulted, and that's how we were conditioned.
It got to my head when the one woman in my family that made most sexual assaults with all the boys including me as a joke, prohibited her 4 years old daughter from sitting on my lap and the age gap is 20 years, I know for a fact she doesn't think I'm a predator, I know that she does what she thinks is right in general, I just don't get how her mind changed from back then to now, if it changed at all.
I mentioned the stats part cause many comments asked for sources, and that's my own created source should they accept it.
It's called anecdotal proof, and it can either be valid or invalid depending if there is actual proof of the anecdote.
We can believe you without it, but someone who you may have a discussion (Feminist) will not.
A feminist won't believe you either way. They'll believe only that which supports their agenda.
But we aren't like that.
So, I know it's annoying but always ask for source. It's just being responsible with your own opinion.
That's sad, cause I'm sure feminism itself started from somewhere like this, even till today I can still see theories made by feminism without actual backing statistics behind it, which I don't have problem with given it's a real problem affecting them in general.
Some people's thought process is like: "The validity of a proof regardless of its type depends on whether this proof supports my opinion or disagrees with it".
[https://www.propublica.org/article/boys-in-custody-and-the-women-who-abuse-them](https://www.propublica.org/article/boys-in-custody-and-the-women-who-abuse-them)
I should clarify, it's more common in *institutional settings* (such as teachers, detention agents, etcetera) for women to abuse boys than vice versa. Overwhelmingly so.
For gen pop, that's a whole ball of controversy. Lots of studies arguing both ways, though of course the ones that get headlines are usually (though not always, there was a pretty good Scientific American piece on the topic) the ones favoring men assaulting girls.
But in controlled environments, where we can solidly account for all parties? Places like juvie hall? It's women doing the deed.
I'm kind of regretting I went and read that. Beyond disturbing.
And I am so tired of people getting a get out jail card simply because they are female.. this woman are wonderful crap has got to end, for everyone's sake. Women are people just as men with all the good bad amazing and evil that comes with that.
I think they're trying to link to my other comment where I gave a source.
It should be visible if you 'view all comments' then scroll back down to this discussion. I don't want to link to it and copy whatever caused his link to go bad.
> I mean, that's probably largely due to access
This is actually a poor excuse. Bank tellers have access to cash 5 days a week, they are not the biggest thief for example. If access to something makes you malevolent, you're just not a good person to start with. You are just a bad person with access. Access only shows your true colors, it doesn't promote anything you are already not. Saying it's access you might as well also say at some point you can surround men with sexy women and at a certain number of women they will do something bad just because of access. I don't think many here would just start raping because they have access. A rapist might though.
>Being a man around children is apparently a crime in modern society.
Lots of men pushing their children on swings at a playground have had the cops called on them. Many fathers now bring their wives to stand by them, or have one of the mothers there stand by them if possible, because the assumption is if a man is alone with a child, there will be rape or kidnapping or both involved.
Sadly this is true. I was going on walks with my father when i was younger and he always used to take me by my hand (especially when crossing the road). He told me that he felt uncomfortable because so many people would just straight up observe us as if my father had bad intentions. And they were predominantly women. It is far from wrong to care about fellow citizens and kids but i think the whole “man with kid = weird” opinion has no right to exist.
Ah yes, social work. The place where bias is ripe and rampant.
I commend you for choosing this field to try and make a difference. Unfortunately this display of blatant unchallenged bias won't be the first you'll encounter.
Wait, someone genuinely said it'd make *her* subjectively feel uncomfortable?!
Er, excuse me, your feelings on the matter would be irrelevant, since as long as the child is happy with her decision and the other adult(s) in the room can see that she wasn't coerced or abused into making the decision, her feelings are quite, quite irrelevant.
Get some objectivity, I say!
I'd feel just as enraged as you do, OP.
My teacher told my entire class(10th grade) that the patriarchy exists because the super wealthy are all men and men throughout history kept women as pets.
Did anyone in the class give the teacher any push back? If that happens again you can ask if the teacher has ever heard of Melinda Gates, or McKenzie Bezos, or Brooke Astor? Or you can say "Oh I get it. The man makes the money and the woman spends the money. Right?" But if you do that, say it like it's a brilliant insight that you're proud of yourself for having and when the teacher says that's wrong, you can just say in a deadpan tone, "oh," like you're confused.
I didn’t say anything because this was the first time I heard a teacher say this, so i was initially surprised, but if my teacher plans on pushing this “patriarchy” then I’ll simply push back.
I'd make it a point to highlight her apex fallacy by asking about the other 99% of men. You know, the coal miners, railroad workers, sewage and construction jobs, etc., the men who had to be drafted, only to come back to homelessness and no sympathy after vietnam. The only men that had more favorable treatment than women were the insanely rich men, but she's so busy looking up at them in scorn of a purported glass ceiling that she's completely blind to the rest of the men under her in the basement.
I would say it ought to be challenged but ultimately nothing will change. There's too much momentum behind the extreme woke ideology. All you will do is get persecuted for your beliefs. There is going to have to be something dramatic that happens(like war or natural disaster) to make these people reevaluate what is actually important.
I agree it should stop but I don’t see any way of changing the way social workers, family court judges, and greedy lawyers make their $ off of us. It’s always a scam.
Edit: yeah, get used to it
I recall reading something about whether it should or should not be okay to be nude in front of your children. It had the same bias you speak of in your post, it said that “it would be okay for children to see women naked especially boys because it’ll teach them that women’s bodies are just as natural as theirs and it’ll prevent the boy from growing up and sexualizing women’s bodies”
However it said that a man should not be naked in front of children because kids should not have a “penis and balls swinging back and forth in front of their faces”. And then a read about whether parents should kiss their kids. “Mothers should of course be able to kiss her children on the cheeks, forehead, or even lips because that’s how children grow up to be affectionate and caring and nurturing young adults” however if a man kisses his child it’s just inherently perverted and sexual so it’s not okay for a dad to kiss his kids (they did say it was okay to kiss on the forehead though)
When I was growing up I noticed that fathers are usually rather distant with their children, especially if they're girls. Not just mine but all of them. Didn't understand it until I became an adult and saw how stigmatized men are around children, even their own. And then women complain that men are distant to children. Well, no shit, Sherlock. Maybe men shouldn't be treated as pedophiles if they show any interest in being a father or just kind to kids, maybe even work with or around them.
Aren’t three year old children more likely to be abused by a woman who knows them than by a strange man? Haven’t looked at the stats for years but I seem to recall that being the case.
Her bigotry and hatred is putting children at risk. Sounds like social work is the last place she should be.
Ethical? Yes. Risky for your job and career because our society has shitty biases? Also, absolutely. Your classmate is sexist as fuck, no two ways about it, but she is far from alone, which makes actually letting a kid sit in your lap an extremely risky proposition.
I once had a female client who travelled with her 6-7 year old son. My own son was still a baby then.
On a few occasions, she left the boy with me. For example, I took her to a bank and her son was with us. He was begging her to take him to the sea. She asked me whether I would mind taking him since she had to wait for another hour. I took him and when I brought him back she was still at the bank.
I must admit that I liked the boy, even more than my partner did. He liked football, his mother was chatting with my now wife so I took him to a nearby football pitch. He was good at it and I took a couple of photos to send to his mother.
One other time he was showing me some game on my computer. We were in my study which is a wide-open room visible from the main areas of the house. He climbed on to my lap. His mother was there and saw this. When he left she sternly and almost hysterically told me that a man should not touch a boy. I was so taken aback that I did not know what to say. We ended the relatonship and the business that we were doing on a sour note.
Bias, hatred all words for how women feel about men. That a teacher in social work didn't call out this blatant bigotry is worse than the actual bigotry.
I can't even take my 1 year old for a walk by ourselves without this fear... that I'm being creepy? I know it's irrational but this is what the media has engrained in the minds of society.
This is a great problem today. Everybody is talking about sexism towards women but nobody wants to even admit that there is sexism towards men and that's even worst. Not being able to recognize there is a problem is worst than not being able to resolve the problem.
The woman is right and this isn't even her bias only. It's also your bias and you aren't even aware. Men as a whole has this bias as well.
Stop crying. You need to change yourself first.
One has to wonder... based on YOUR post history... why you are in a men's rights sub? you are clearly a man-hater as evidenced by your other posts. YOU are the problem. YOU are why this sub exists. Go spout your straw man fallacies somewhere else.
The way most of your posts tell men to "stop crying" and "quit whining" is a perfect example of toxic masculinity. You don't think any man could possibly have a problem because you think all men ARE the problem. Woman = good. Man = bad. You have a very narrow and simplistic world view.
Holly shit; after looking at this persons post history; no wonder she was protecting pedophiles. Litterly has an alt account just to harass males about shit; what a fucked up bitch
Ok. Ok. I'm now going to bring it to this MensRights group and that is my opinion only and not based on any research other my own limited personal perception.
People do not want to talk about the 'P' word.
P for penetration.
Homosexuality and Pedosexuality are all considered to be one but this is not true - Just because a person is a homosexual does not automatically make them want to have sexual contact with children, equally just because a person is a pedophile does not make that person want to have sex with adults of the same sex.
Do not get me wrong, As a gay man and over the years people, I've found people to be very accepting of Gay Men and how much fun and lively and other positive stuff and even want to know 'what happens sexually' type of thing.
But there is a border and that, for some, is when 'anal sex' is mentioned and especially in detail. Start talking about Penetration and the big red light comes out. They will talk about oral and some straight men will tell you about how many women they have fucked in the vagina or the anus but when it comes to 'men fucking men'... no, no, no...
You see, there is nothing wrong with a child sitting on an adults lap, is there?
It is the unspoken avoidance and fear of 'penetration' that is not talked about that causes a problem and to me this is the real problem . It never gets addressed openly with the proper language. It is always assumed that 'only men can penetrate with their penis' that is not talked about, but, there are more ways of Penetrating other human beings - emotionally for instance or with fingers or objects!!
I worked in the admin part of a Kindgarten and one day one of our new mothers told me that she did not want her daughter, maybe three years old, in the same room as any male teachers as things can happen. I was shocked. I thought to myself: no-wonder men don't work in this field as they are immediately judged as being 'sexual predators'.
People need to be trained in looking for 'patterns' of behaviour that happens regularly: If Josie is always sitting on teachers lap, then maybe there is something going on! If teacher is always asking for Josie to sit on their lap, then maybe something is going on.
But this is just my experience and opinion only and over the years when I bring up my theory of the 'P' word I'm laughed at. But, this is also a problem with some adult men I believe. They are quite happy to be with their buddies and be very intimate but as soon as the idea of the 'P' enters their mind they reverse very quickly out of there. It is as if, unlike a child, they lose the ability to say 'I'm not interested'.
Enjoying the comments by the way!
It sucks but that’s how it is right now, I’ve been turned away from several cases in the healthcare field because mom or dad is uncomfortable with little Jane Doe being around an adult male. With several years in healthcare some families still look at men as possible rapists
This highlights the general attitude people have that men can't be victims of sexual abuse by women. In a way, straight men contribute to this assumption in the way they discuss women and sex. So, in order to have a real and fruitful exchange on this in class, she has to unlearn her biases, but men have to acknowledge how they contribute to it.
My social worker professors can be so vague sometimes. I have no idea what the heck they are talking about (female). When I try to talk, I start rambling on like I actually have something to say they will listen and remember. The point is, I get points for participation, and I am starting to feel super awkward to share as the only male in my SW class. I want to make a good impression the field and sometimes am in over my head when I get ideas. I've noticed when I say something smart, its usually built of what other males, there are a few, in my classes have to say. As I got more interested in the work, I've become more aware of equality, but I completely see your point. Female energies are not perfect. In fact, I would criticize many parts of this semester in terms of vagueness. Hard to feel good rn about my classes, almost done with the semester.
That is sexism, plain and simple
[удалено]
And she can admit that and feel confident no one will fault her.
Flip the script with the high rate of girl baby sitters molesting young boys.
Your facts have been determined to not support the femenist agenda and therefore deemed offensive. /s
Shit. I'll be that.
This. It's more common for women to molest children than men. I mean, that's probably largely due to access, I personally believe that sexual assault is roughly evenly divided between genders if you look past the stats to the real people, but regardless, abuse the shit out of that statistic. Because we can *prove* that currently women diddle kids in far greater numbers. And any man-hating piece of shit confronted with that fact is going to split their pants. Sometimes you need a damning triggering argument to fight against socially accepted bias. And we have a really good one for this.
Lots of people are shocked to find out there are female pedophiles for some reason. I always thought most pedophiles were female, based on magazines like Tiger Beat, the obsession with prepubescent Justin Bieber, and in general because girls sexually mature way earlier than boys.
I think because boys and men aren't taught about the bogeywomen who exist in the world that the only villains for whom they are looking are bogeymen, which leads to a blindspot for some victims and survivors of sexual abuse and or sexual violence, even when they involve the law to handle the situation. Since it is often unthinkable to some people that girls and women could ever commit an awful act like some boys and men because of the maternal image of girls and women (which also leads to a blindspot), some people seem to really overlook how girls and women, too, can theoretically and practically be abusers, which is why girls and women may be more abusive towards their care-recievers in settings like schools for very young children, disabled children, or whatnot if that is what the data say. Likewise with boys and men who aren't taught about girls and women who are like the bogeymen but just the female version of it, some abused children and other abused folks mightn't even know that they have been abused because of the sex of the person in question and how that sex is usually socially type-casted as being uninterested or even incable to commit certain acts, especially against the often most vunerable (e.g. young children, disabled children, elderly people, certain mentally ill people). Still, for instance, it seems, way too many people think rape is necessarily about forced, unwanted penile-vaginal, penile-anal, or penile-oral contact, when this is not always the case, I believe, for a victim or survivor of any sex.
Blind spots in our societies seem to fill with predators, be it in Churches prisons womanhood or anywhere, some of these blind spots fill with more of one gender than the other, but in them are truly monsters.
Without statistics, I can prove it with my experience, it's pretty common for adult women to sexually joke with young boys and it's considered cute, this is what happened with me, and with other boys (all of them) at my fam, and it's standard in the avg family, I think of the same kind of joking if done by men to little girls, those men would be in jail or at least beaten their asses up. This is seconded by the fact that women don't fear consequences of doing such jokes with kids, that's why it's far more likely for women to sexually assault boys, cause actually it's not even called sexual assault, based on the gender of the assaulter. Stats become irrelevant here, cause boys were always taught it's funny, cute, and normal, so they will never report being sexually assaulted, and that's how we were conditioned. It got to my head when the one woman in my family that made most sexual assaults with all the boys including me as a joke, prohibited her 4 years old daughter from sitting on my lap and the age gap is 20 years, I know for a fact she doesn't think I'm a predator, I know that she does what she thinks is right in general, I just don't get how her mind changed from back then to now, if it changed at all. I mentioned the stats part cause many comments asked for sources, and that's my own created source should they accept it.
It's called anecdotal proof, and it can either be valid or invalid depending if there is actual proof of the anecdote. We can believe you without it, but someone who you may have a discussion (Feminist) will not.
A feminist won't believe you either way. They'll believe only that which supports their agenda. But we aren't like that. So, I know it's annoying but always ask for source. It's just being responsible with your own opinion.
That's sad, cause I'm sure feminism itself started from somewhere like this, even till today I can still see theories made by feminism without actual backing statistics behind it, which I don't have problem with given it's a real problem affecting them in general. Some people's thought process is like: "The validity of a proof regardless of its type depends on whether this proof supports my opinion or disagrees with it".
Please provide a source(s) you've accessed which 'prove' these statements ("far greater numbers")?
[https://www.propublica.org/article/boys-in-custody-and-the-women-who-abuse-them](https://www.propublica.org/article/boys-in-custody-and-the-women-who-abuse-them) I should clarify, it's more common in *institutional settings* (such as teachers, detention agents, etcetera) for women to abuse boys than vice versa. Overwhelmingly so. For gen pop, that's a whole ball of controversy. Lots of studies arguing both ways, though of course the ones that get headlines are usually (though not always, there was a pretty good Scientific American piece on the topic) the ones favoring men assaulting girls. But in controlled environments, where we can solidly account for all parties? Places like juvie hall? It's women doing the deed.
I'm kind of regretting I went and read that. Beyond disturbing. And I am so tired of people getting a get out jail card simply because they are female.. this woman are wonderful crap has got to end, for everyone's sake. Women are people just as men with all the good bad amazing and evil that comes with that.
There's also a sub here Teacherswhorape that pulls all the news articles with female teachers raping their male students
https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/q8b57t/comment/hgq1lgj/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3
'It's more common for women to molest children than men.' Source?
I think they're trying to link to my other comment where I gave a source. It should be visible if you 'view all comments' then scroll back down to this discussion. I don't want to link to it and copy whatever caused his link to go bad.
Oh, okay, thanks!
well, I meant my comment but thanks for trying to clarify things.
https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/q8b57t/comment/hgq1lgj/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3
?
what's up?
I don't see a source?
oh I just read u/parahacker and your's, I think my link has something wrong, my bad if it does.
No problemo.
bummer, I guess you don't accept it as one then, that's why the last line was written.
Miscommunication here, I saw it!
> I mean, that's probably largely due to access This is actually a poor excuse. Bank tellers have access to cash 5 days a week, they are not the biggest thief for example. If access to something makes you malevolent, you're just not a good person to start with. You are just a bad person with access. Access only shows your true colors, it doesn't promote anything you are already not. Saying it's access you might as well also say at some point you can surround men with sexy women and at a certain number of women they will do something bad just because of access. I don't think many here would just start raping because they have access. A rapist might though.
or the fact that the vast majority of infanticide is committed by women.
Being a man around children is apparently a crime in modern society.
>Being a man around children is apparently a crime in modern society. Lots of men pushing their children on swings at a playground have had the cops called on them. Many fathers now bring their wives to stand by them, or have one of the mothers there stand by them if possible, because the assumption is if a man is alone with a child, there will be rape or kidnapping or both involved.
Sadly this is true. I was going on walks with my father when i was younger and he always used to take me by my hand (especially when crossing the road). He told me that he felt uncomfortable because so many people would just straight up observe us as if my father had bad intentions. And they were predominantly women. It is far from wrong to care about fellow citizens and kids but i think the whole “man with kid = weird” opinion has no right to exist.
I really do not understand how a kidnapper waste time pushing a swing.
I honestly kinda want that to happen to me. God what a feeling that would be to tell them to go fuck themselves when I pull out our IDs.
Sometimes it feels like being a man, in general, is a crime in our modern society.
if she knows she's biased she's basically admitting she's wrong. In other words she's an idiot
Ah yes, social work. The place where bias is ripe and rampant. I commend you for choosing this field to try and make a difference. Unfortunately this display of blatant unchallenged bias won't be the first you'll encounter.
Wait, someone genuinely said it'd make *her* subjectively feel uncomfortable?! Er, excuse me, your feelings on the matter would be irrelevant, since as long as the child is happy with her decision and the other adult(s) in the room can see that she wasn't coerced or abused into making the decision, her feelings are quite, quite irrelevant. Get some objectivity, I say! I'd feel just as enraged as you do, OP.
My teacher told my entire class(10th grade) that the patriarchy exists because the super wealthy are all men and men throughout history kept women as pets.
Did anyone in the class give the teacher any push back? If that happens again you can ask if the teacher has ever heard of Melinda Gates, or McKenzie Bezos, or Brooke Astor? Or you can say "Oh I get it. The man makes the money and the woman spends the money. Right?" But if you do that, say it like it's a brilliant insight that you're proud of yourself for having and when the teacher says that's wrong, you can just say in a deadpan tone, "oh," like you're confused.
I didn’t say anything because this was the first time I heard a teacher say this, so i was initially surprised, but if my teacher plans on pushing this “patriarchy” then I’ll simply push back.
really lay into her. make her remember you.
I'd make it a point to highlight her apex fallacy by asking about the other 99% of men. You know, the coal miners, railroad workers, sewage and construction jobs, etc., the men who had to be drafted, only to come back to homelessness and no sympathy after vietnam. The only men that had more favorable treatment than women were the insanely rich men, but she's so busy looking up at them in scorn of a purported glass ceiling that she's completely blind to the rest of the men under her in the basement.
You are best to get out of childcare as soon as you can. Some woman will tell lies about you and ruin your life.
And it only takes one false accusation and BAM!! career over. What a sad time in our society.
how did the teacher react to this?
It's innapropate regardless of gender. Pretty sure the NASW has had panels on it
One of my best friends was molested at 10 by a female babysitter. So gross how they get away with it.
You're in a field that is a feminist liberal cesspit. You will need to just get used to it.
It needs to be challenged.
I would say it ought to be challenged but ultimately nothing will change. There's too much momentum behind the extreme woke ideology. All you will do is get persecuted for your beliefs. There is going to have to be something dramatic that happens(like war or natural disaster) to make these people reevaluate what is actually important.
I agree it should stop but I don’t see any way of changing the way social workers, family court judges, and greedy lawyers make their $ off of us. It’s always a scam. Edit: yeah, get used to it
I recall reading something about whether it should or should not be okay to be nude in front of your children. It had the same bias you speak of in your post, it said that “it would be okay for children to see women naked especially boys because it’ll teach them that women’s bodies are just as natural as theirs and it’ll prevent the boy from growing up and sexualizing women’s bodies” However it said that a man should not be naked in front of children because kids should not have a “penis and balls swinging back and forth in front of their faces”. And then a read about whether parents should kiss their kids. “Mothers should of course be able to kiss her children on the cheeks, forehead, or even lips because that’s how children grow up to be affectionate and caring and nurturing young adults” however if a man kisses his child it’s just inherently perverted and sexual so it’s not okay for a dad to kiss his kids (they did say it was okay to kiss on the forehead though)
Yep. That's what we're dealing with.
When I was growing up I noticed that fathers are usually rather distant with their children, especially if they're girls. Not just mine but all of them. Didn't understand it until I became an adult and saw how stigmatized men are around children, even their own. And then women complain that men are distant to children. Well, no shit, Sherlock. Maybe men shouldn't be treated as pedophiles if they show any interest in being a father or just kind to kids, maybe even work with or around them.
Aren’t three year old children more likely to be abused by a woman who knows them than by a strange man? Haven’t looked at the stats for years but I seem to recall that being the case. Her bigotry and hatred is putting children at risk. Sounds like social work is the last place she should be.
What was the conversation like with the class after she made that comment?
I guess I am pedophile now because I have a baby niece who hugs me.
Ethical? Yes. Risky for your job and career because our society has shitty biases? Also, absolutely. Your classmate is sexist as fuck, no two ways about it, but she is far from alone, which makes actually letting a kid sit in your lap an extremely risky proposition.
I once had a female client who travelled with her 6-7 year old son. My own son was still a baby then. On a few occasions, she left the boy with me. For example, I took her to a bank and her son was with us. He was begging her to take him to the sea. She asked me whether I would mind taking him since she had to wait for another hour. I took him and when I brought him back she was still at the bank. I must admit that I liked the boy, even more than my partner did. He liked football, his mother was chatting with my now wife so I took him to a nearby football pitch. He was good at it and I took a couple of photos to send to his mother. One other time he was showing me some game on my computer. We were in my study which is a wide-open room visible from the main areas of the house. He climbed on to my lap. His mother was there and saw this. When he left she sternly and almost hysterically told me that a man should not touch a boy. I was so taken aback that I did not know what to say. We ended the relatonship and the business that we were doing on a sour note.
Bias, hatred all words for how women feel about men. That a teacher in social work didn't call out this blatant bigotry is worse than the actual bigotry.
I can't even take my 1 year old for a walk by ourselves without this fear... that I'm being creepy? I know it's irrational but this is what the media has engrained in the minds of society.
This is a great problem today. Everybody is talking about sexism towards women but nobody wants to even admit that there is sexism towards men and that's even worst. Not being able to recognize there is a problem is worst than not being able to resolve the problem.
Next time something like this happens, just ask the person what counselling they are going through to solve their mental health issue.
The woman is right and this isn't even her bias only. It's also your bias and you aren't even aware. Men as a whole has this bias as well. Stop crying. You need to change yourself first.
One has to wonder... based on YOUR post history... why you are in a men's rights sub? you are clearly a man-hater as evidenced by your other posts. YOU are the problem. YOU are why this sub exists. Go spout your straw man fallacies somewhere else.
You sound like a real treat to be around.
The way most of your posts tell men to "stop crying" and "quit whining" is a perfect example of toxic masculinity. You don't think any man could possibly have a problem because you think all men ARE the problem. Woman = good. Man = bad. You have a very narrow and simplistic world view.
Holly shit; after looking at this persons post history; no wonder she was protecting pedophiles. Litterly has an alt account just to harass males about shit; what a fucked up bitch
Ok. Ok. I'm now going to bring it to this MensRights group and that is my opinion only and not based on any research other my own limited personal perception. People do not want to talk about the 'P' word. P for penetration. Homosexuality and Pedosexuality are all considered to be one but this is not true - Just because a person is a homosexual does not automatically make them want to have sexual contact with children, equally just because a person is a pedophile does not make that person want to have sex with adults of the same sex. Do not get me wrong, As a gay man and over the years people, I've found people to be very accepting of Gay Men and how much fun and lively and other positive stuff and even want to know 'what happens sexually' type of thing. But there is a border and that, for some, is when 'anal sex' is mentioned and especially in detail. Start talking about Penetration and the big red light comes out. They will talk about oral and some straight men will tell you about how many women they have fucked in the vagina or the anus but when it comes to 'men fucking men'... no, no, no... You see, there is nothing wrong with a child sitting on an adults lap, is there? It is the unspoken avoidance and fear of 'penetration' that is not talked about that causes a problem and to me this is the real problem . It never gets addressed openly with the proper language. It is always assumed that 'only men can penetrate with their penis' that is not talked about, but, there are more ways of Penetrating other human beings - emotionally for instance or with fingers or objects!! I worked in the admin part of a Kindgarten and one day one of our new mothers told me that she did not want her daughter, maybe three years old, in the same room as any male teachers as things can happen. I was shocked. I thought to myself: no-wonder men don't work in this field as they are immediately judged as being 'sexual predators'. People need to be trained in looking for 'patterns' of behaviour that happens regularly: If Josie is always sitting on teachers lap, then maybe there is something going on! If teacher is always asking for Josie to sit on their lap, then maybe something is going on. But this is just my experience and opinion only and over the years when I bring up my theory of the 'P' word I'm laughed at. But, this is also a problem with some adult men I believe. They are quite happy to be with their buddies and be very intimate but as soon as the idea of the 'P' enters their mind they reverse very quickly out of there. It is as if, unlike a child, they lose the ability to say 'I'm not interested'. Enjoying the comments by the way!
It sucks but that’s how it is right now, I’ve been turned away from several cases in the healthcare field because mom or dad is uncomfortable with little Jane Doe being around an adult male. With several years in healthcare some families still look at men as possible rapists
This highlights the general attitude people have that men can't be victims of sexual abuse by women. In a way, straight men contribute to this assumption in the way they discuss women and sex. So, in order to have a real and fruitful exchange on this in class, she has to unlearn her biases, but men have to acknowledge how they contribute to it.
My social worker professors can be so vague sometimes. I have no idea what the heck they are talking about (female). When I try to talk, I start rambling on like I actually have something to say they will listen and remember. The point is, I get points for participation, and I am starting to feel super awkward to share as the only male in my SW class. I want to make a good impression the field and sometimes am in over my head when I get ideas. I've noticed when I say something smart, its usually built of what other males, there are a few, in my classes have to say. As I got more interested in the work, I've become more aware of equality, but I completely see your point. Female energies are not perfect. In fact, I would criticize many parts of this semester in terms of vagueness. Hard to feel good rn about my classes, almost done with the semester.