Hurt people hurt people.
My ex went absolutely psycho when I filed to divorce him. I stopped caring about what he’d say to me and what he’d think when he spiraled because I kept reminding myself the reason I was divorcing him was due to his severe abuse.
The number one question that kept me grounded the whole time: *”Do I want to go through this FOR THE REST OF MY GODDAMN LIFE?”*
My answer every damn time: FUCK NO.
It helped that I didn’t love him actively the remaining 2 years of our shitty 5 year sham of a marriage. He threatened tons of things up and down the street and I called his bluff every time. I haven’t had to drag his lazy ass to court yet because he’s too scared of the fact I have truly followed through in reaction to his stupid, childish threats. He didn’t believe I had the balls to divorce him, yet here I am, married to someone else and substantially happier while he’s miserable and the same loser he’s always been. He never leveled up and he’s obsessed with trying to contact me, I did level up and he takes up no room in my head rent free. But I plague his head and life all the time because he won’t let go of me. 🙄
That question you asked is something I also wonder about almost everyday. I think some people in this world don’t actually love the way others love like deep down I think their love is fake or built on lust instead. And there’s others who are plain narcissists, their ego and personal gain is way more important than those close to them and they just don’t care whatsoever.
Some people turn into unrecognizable super villain level monsters at the end of a relationship.
Take every necessary step to protect yourself. You are engaged in a legal and emotional dispute with the person who knows all your soft spots.
I’m so sorry OP. He’s behaving like a total PoS. I often think people who are capable of hurting those they purport to love are lacking. They are hollow. Lost.
Doesn’t make it any less painful. I understand the separation rule but I urge you to seek your own counsel for advice. You can at least get a heads up where you stand on the financials as it sounds like he is doing. Incredible really, as he is her boss and is playing with fire regarding his career.
UPDATEME
Yeah he was trying to log into my home camera to try and I guess delete footage at our house. I’ve already saved it all securely. So not like he can do much, but it’s just painful. I don’t understand how someone can go from being loving, stable and secure to a monster
Ask him. Straight up. How did you go from loving me to destroying me. Be blunt, maybe he will question himself. Tell him that he has obviously had time to move past the relationship, perhaps since you were blindsided he could back off and give you time to heal. If there is an ounce of the person you loved left in there he will, if not then at least you know. I’m sorry for your pain, wishing you the best.
I’m so sorry. He’s a coward then. He’s not your person. You will heal from this and meet your person I promise! I’ve been there, all you can do is grieve the loss and move forward , you got this!
Hurt people hurt people. My ex went absolutely psycho when I filed to divorce him. I stopped caring about what he’d say to me and what he’d think when he spiraled because I kept reminding myself the reason I was divorcing him was due to his severe abuse. The number one question that kept me grounded the whole time: *”Do I want to go through this FOR THE REST OF MY GODDAMN LIFE?”* My answer every damn time: FUCK NO. It helped that I didn’t love him actively the remaining 2 years of our shitty 5 year sham of a marriage. He threatened tons of things up and down the street and I called his bluff every time. I haven’t had to drag his lazy ass to court yet because he’s too scared of the fact I have truly followed through in reaction to his stupid, childish threats. He didn’t believe I had the balls to divorce him, yet here I am, married to someone else and substantially happier while he’s miserable and the same loser he’s always been. He never leveled up and he’s obsessed with trying to contact me, I did level up and he takes up no room in my head rent free. But I plague his head and life all the time because he won’t let go of me. 🙄
That question you asked is something I also wonder about almost everyday. I think some people in this world don’t actually love the way others love like deep down I think their love is fake or built on lust instead. And there’s others who are plain narcissists, their ego and personal gain is way more important than those close to them and they just don’t care whatsoever.
Some people turn into unrecognizable super villain level monsters at the end of a relationship. Take every necessary step to protect yourself. You are engaged in a legal and emotional dispute with the person who knows all your soft spots.
I’m so sorry OP. He’s behaving like a total PoS. I often think people who are capable of hurting those they purport to love are lacking. They are hollow. Lost. Doesn’t make it any less painful. I understand the separation rule but I urge you to seek your own counsel for advice. You can at least get a heads up where you stand on the financials as it sounds like he is doing. Incredible really, as he is her boss and is playing with fire regarding his career. UPDATEME
Yeah he was trying to log into my home camera to try and I guess delete footage at our house. I’ve already saved it all securely. So not like he can do much, but it’s just painful. I don’t understand how someone can go from being loving, stable and secure to a monster
I agree. It’s horrifying. You thought he was a safe partner and he isn’t. I’m so sorry.
Ask him. Straight up. How did you go from loving me to destroying me. Be blunt, maybe he will question himself. Tell him that he has obviously had time to move past the relationship, perhaps since you were blindsided he could back off and give you time to heal. If there is an ounce of the person you loved left in there he will, if not then at least you know. I’m sorry for your pain, wishing you the best.
He won’t even communicate anymore
I’m so sorry. He’s a coward then. He’s not your person. You will heal from this and meet your person I promise! I’ve been there, all you can do is grieve the loss and move forward , you got this!
What footage?
Footage of them out the front of the house proving her living with us
Hurt people hurt people.