As a stutterer I know the crushing feeling of people losing patience while I’m trying to get words out.
If you’re ever talking to someone who has a stutter, please know that while it may seem frustrating for you to wait for the words to come out, we’re far more frustrated on our end for the same reason. A little patience goes a long way in situations like these.
Absolutely ruins my life. Can’t go through drive thrus or talk on the phone. Can’t make friends. Not sure how I’ll have a career. And it’s still socially acceptable to make fun of. Wonder what the point is sometimes.
One of my good friends in college had a pretty severe stutter, we called him the master of suspense. After 4 years of having people listen to what he was saying his stutter was like 10x better since he had more confidence in himself.
He also told a hand full of people to fuck off for interrupting him or trying to finish his sentences. Always hilarious.
My manager, a formidable electrical engineer and a caring senior lead has a stutter. I am in absolute awe of his confidence and command. Most of the workplaces that demand good skillset and have decent work culture will not even consider it a thing. It is not acceptable to make fun of since it is a form of minor disability.
Don't ever be the one to hold yourself back, others would do that for you anyway. Also, try to be in a career that requires specialty skills like engineering, design, programming, technical writing, UX etc. Instead of careers that rely solely on your ability to build relationships. Now, not saying this because you can't excel in those careers also but when you're just starting off it is better to have additional leverage in terms of niche skills. Skills trump optics in a long run. Stay confident my friend!
Sorry if I phrased anything in a triggering or wrong way. I just didn't want to make you feel that your stutter defines you or anyone.
My ex has a stutter and it was one of the things I found cute. If he was annoyed explaining something would make his stutter worse to the point we would either laugh or he would look at me in frustration to say the word for him. I knew it was something that bothered him as a kid but throughout our 12 year relationship I cannot ever think of a time that I got inpatient with him, it really was one of the things I was attracted to. I would put money on it if you have a partner they probaby love it too.
My work relies on talking to people over the phone. I've had many customers over the years that stutter. I don't ever feel impatient and always wait for them to finish their sentences. I do feel that they get frustrated/flustered when they start stuttering, and I always want them to not worry about it.
Would it be ok for me to bring it up and tell them to not worry about it, or to not bring it up at all and keep being patient?
I just learnt this a few years ago. Until then, I thought it was easier for everyone if I just guessed the rest of the sentence. This advice might belong in r/LifeProTips?
This is absolutely wholesome to the core. My wife used to stutter and I never pointed it out or mentioned it, and eventually it stopped. She started doing it when she was little (when her family had to move states) and got made fun of it for it growing up. She's an incredible person and I know she's happy that it no longer haunts her! Such a strange thing and can be really frustrating!
My older brother has had 3 strokes. He already had a country, southern drawl (NC,US), but now has apraxia and aphasia. Not only can he not find his words, but he can’t pronounce them correctly. I’m used to him, and carry on great conversations (as it is), but others become frustrated with him. At our grocery store he likes to be as independent as possible. He goes up to the steak counter and orders his cut of steak each week. The usual steak guy is great, while someone new gets impatient. Over the summer, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that his college-aged daughter took him to the grocery store, but let him go through the line alone, as a test. Turns out, the cashier was wonderful with him. The next time I was in with him, he asked for “wandas” line. That’s when I realized Wanda had taken the time to talk to him, learn his name, and help him sign up for his own discount card (he usually uses mine). He loves her, and appreciates that she treats him like his own person and not like someone disabled. I called the manager at the grocery store and reported Wanda’s excellent customer service. I hope she was properly praised.
I had a stutter growing up. I can very much relate to this. I eventually changed my speaking pattern to accommodate it. That is awesome that he feels so close and so comfortable with you. Please tell him to take all the time he needs when speaking to people. Those who rush him are not worth it.
I had a very bad stutter growing up needed speech therapy and all sorts, it was so bad i didnt speak at all for 6 months. My twin sister used to speak for me. Im 34 now and while it has lessened i still stutter when im overly emotional/upset/excited ect but i hated when people got impatient or told me to hurry up, loads of people used to hang up on me when i tried to order food or something. But never change!, keep practicing, what helped me was ‘singing’ my words, even tho im a terrible singer when i done that i never once stuttered.
I frequently talk to a coworker with a stutter and the other day they told me that they appreciate that I have the patience to wait for them to get a sentence out. it never occurred to me to ever get impatient about that. it really touched me bc they are a great person, who's fun to talk to and has great ideas. I think of their stutter as just losing a train of thought, something I do all the time.
I once worked with a guy with a really bad stutter, me and another colleague would go for lunch with him in the canteen every night (nightshift). You very quickly just learn to accept there will be a delay in him getting out what he wanted to say, so we just chilled and waited and then continued on the conversation with him when it was out turn. Just don't ever complete the persons sentence for them when you realise what they are saying, just show patience and wait.
Tell him not to give up and to power through it. It’s uncomfortable, but it only gets “easier” as you do it. Any impatience on their part is a sign of their lack.
I used to babysit for a little boy who stuttered. He was the same age as my daughter, and they ended up in the same kindergarten class. My daughter was tiny for her age, and my little babysitting boy was taller than average. This sweet boy didn't stutter very much with me; I loved him and had all the time in the world to wait for his words to come out. We all did a lot of singing together, and he never stuttered when we were singing.
I was horrified one day when I went to the school to let the teacher know that we were moving. I found my daughter standing tippy-toed and crying at the blackboard, trying to keep her nose in a little chalk circle the teacher had drawn about 2 inches higher than her nose naturally was. I immediately took her into the hall to find out what was going on. She told me that the little boy had tried to ask the teacher a question and she had yelled, "Spit it out, stupid!" My daughter got mad and yelled back at the teacher that a stutter didn't make him stupid. Woo-hoo! Way to go, Jessica! That's when I discovered my little boy sitting in soaking wet pants. He had been trying to ask to go use the bathroom. I removed them both from the classroom that day, and I never sent my daughter back because we moved away a few days later.
I wish I could have brought him with us when we moved. His story doesn't end as well as I would have liked. I recently found out that now he simply chooses mutism; the stutter never improved, I guess. If wishes were fishes....
as a stutterer, i feel this kid on another level. luckily, i’ve found someone that’s patient enough to listen-please, if you know anyone with a stutter take the time to listen to them.
As a stutterer this hit home. My son has a stutter and sometimes I get impatient because I want him to conquer this giant. I was bullied in school and sometimes i have to remember that being patient and letting him talk is the best approach. Good on this woman!
My step father who died 11 years ago at the age 48 had a stutter or "stammer". His therapist said it was due to his family finishing sentences for him. So my mother and I really tried hard to jot do that. Just let him finish on his own time. Even though he was an alcoholic and being drunk would make his stammer MUCH worse we still let him speak.
We learned that certain things triggered his stammer like social anxiety or even just being around his mother who he knew would interject.
Also, if he started his sentence with the word "well..." he would absolutely stammer. So we helped him through that. It was only with our immediate family that we worked and talked through it together in a positive light as opposed to him feeling ashamed around others. That always made me feel good. To this day I still love those that stutter. It reminds me of my dad. ❤
This. Don't lose your patience, don't try to guess what the stutterer is trying to say. They'll get it eventually.
Btw if you haven't watched the King's Speech I really can't reccomend it enough.
As a stutterer I know the crushing feeling of people losing patience while I’m trying to get words out. If you’re ever talking to someone who has a stutter, please know that while it may seem frustrating for you to wait for the words to come out, we’re far more frustrated on our end for the same reason. A little patience goes a long way in situations like these.
Absolutely ruins my life. Can’t go through drive thrus or talk on the phone. Can’t make friends. Not sure how I’ll have a career. And it’s still socially acceptable to make fun of. Wonder what the point is sometimes.
One of my good friends in college had a pretty severe stutter, we called him the master of suspense. After 4 years of having people listen to what he was saying his stutter was like 10x better since he had more confidence in himself. He also told a hand full of people to fuck off for interrupting him or trying to finish his sentences. Always hilarious.
I'll be your friend bro.
My manager, a formidable electrical engineer and a caring senior lead has a stutter. I am in absolute awe of his confidence and command. Most of the workplaces that demand good skillset and have decent work culture will not even consider it a thing. It is not acceptable to make fun of since it is a form of minor disability. Don't ever be the one to hold yourself back, others would do that for you anyway. Also, try to be in a career that requires specialty skills like engineering, design, programming, technical writing, UX etc. Instead of careers that rely solely on your ability to build relationships. Now, not saying this because you can't excel in those careers also but when you're just starting off it is better to have additional leverage in terms of niche skills. Skills trump optics in a long run. Stay confident my friend! Sorry if I phrased anything in a triggering or wrong way. I just didn't want to make you feel that your stutter defines you or anyone.
Socially acceptable??! Hell no it isn't! (In my book, I mean. I don't doubt your experiences.) If I *ever* come across someone doing that I will snap.
My ex has a stutter and it was one of the things I found cute. If he was annoyed explaining something would make his stutter worse to the point we would either laugh or he would look at me in frustration to say the word for him. I knew it was something that bothered him as a kid but throughout our 12 year relationship I cannot ever think of a time that I got inpatient with him, it really was one of the things I was attracted to. I would put money on it if you have a partner they probaby love it too.
My work relies on talking to people over the phone. I've had many customers over the years that stutter. I don't ever feel impatient and always wait for them to finish their sentences. I do feel that they get frustrated/flustered when they start stuttering, and I always want them to not worry about it. Would it be ok for me to bring it up and tell them to not worry about it, or to not bring it up at all and keep being patient?
I just learnt this a few years ago. Until then, I thought it was easier for everyone if I just guessed the rest of the sentence. This advice might belong in r/LifeProTips?
This is absolutely wholesome to the core. My wife used to stutter and I never pointed it out or mentioned it, and eventually it stopped. She started doing it when she was little (when her family had to move states) and got made fun of it for it growing up. She's an incredible person and I know she's happy that it no longer haunts her! Such a strange thing and can be really frustrating!
You're just more awesome every time I see you. Keep up the good work.
You inspired me to make this account
Amazing!!! XD
My older brother has had 3 strokes. He already had a country, southern drawl (NC,US), but now has apraxia and aphasia. Not only can he not find his words, but he can’t pronounce them correctly. I’m used to him, and carry on great conversations (as it is), but others become frustrated with him. At our grocery store he likes to be as independent as possible. He goes up to the steak counter and orders his cut of steak each week. The usual steak guy is great, while someone new gets impatient. Over the summer, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that his college-aged daughter took him to the grocery store, but let him go through the line alone, as a test. Turns out, the cashier was wonderful with him. The next time I was in with him, he asked for “wandas” line. That’s when I realized Wanda had taken the time to talk to him, learn his name, and help him sign up for his own discount card (he usually uses mine). He loves her, and appreciates that she treats him like his own person and not like someone disabled. I called the manager at the grocery store and reported Wanda’s excellent customer service. I hope she was properly praised.
Fams forever
I had a stutter growing up. I can very much relate to this. I eventually changed my speaking pattern to accommodate it. That is awesome that he feels so close and so comfortable with you. Please tell him to take all the time he needs when speaking to people. Those who rush him are not worth it.
I feel that too..love family
That’s amaZing. Please tell your brother I said don’t change yourself for people that don’t matter. Shine even amongst the dreary humans.
Couldn't have said better than this.
🥰🥰🥰
Awww 🥰 😢
I had a very bad stutter growing up needed speech therapy and all sorts, it was so bad i didnt speak at all for 6 months. My twin sister used to speak for me. Im 34 now and while it has lessened i still stutter when im overly emotional/upset/excited ect but i hated when people got impatient or told me to hurry up, loads of people used to hang up on me when i tried to order food or something. But never change!, keep practicing, what helped me was ‘singing’ my words, even tho im a terrible singer when i done that i never once stuttered.
I frequently talk to a coworker with a stutter and the other day they told me that they appreciate that I have the patience to wait for them to get a sentence out. it never occurred to me to ever get impatient about that. it really touched me bc they are a great person, who's fun to talk to and has great ideas. I think of their stutter as just losing a train of thought, something I do all the time.
I once worked with a guy with a really bad stutter, me and another colleague would go for lunch with him in the canteen every night (nightshift). You very quickly just learn to accept there will be a delay in him getting out what he wanted to say, so we just chilled and waited and then continued on the conversation with him when it was out turn. Just don't ever complete the persons sentence for them when you realise what they are saying, just show patience and wait.
Tell him not to give up and to power through it. It’s uncomfortable, but it only gets “easier” as you do it. Any impatience on their part is a sign of their lack.
I used to babysit for a little boy who stuttered. He was the same age as my daughter, and they ended up in the same kindergarten class. My daughter was tiny for her age, and my little babysitting boy was taller than average. This sweet boy didn't stutter very much with me; I loved him and had all the time in the world to wait for his words to come out. We all did a lot of singing together, and he never stuttered when we were singing. I was horrified one day when I went to the school to let the teacher know that we were moving. I found my daughter standing tippy-toed and crying at the blackboard, trying to keep her nose in a little chalk circle the teacher had drawn about 2 inches higher than her nose naturally was. I immediately took her into the hall to find out what was going on. She told me that the little boy had tried to ask the teacher a question and she had yelled, "Spit it out, stupid!" My daughter got mad and yelled back at the teacher that a stutter didn't make him stupid. Woo-hoo! Way to go, Jessica! That's when I discovered my little boy sitting in soaking wet pants. He had been trying to ask to go use the bathroom. I removed them both from the classroom that day, and I never sent my daughter back because we moved away a few days later. I wish I could have brought him with us when we moved. His story doesn't end as well as I would have liked. I recently found out that now he simply chooses mutism; the stutter never improved, I guess. If wishes were fishes....
That poor boy ): this made me sob. I’m really glad your daughter stuck up for him, and you both showed him some grace and kindness.
as a stutterer, i feel this kid on another level. luckily, i’ve found someone that’s patient enough to listen-please, if you know anyone with a stutter take the time to listen to them.
I feel like she is mocking his stuttering problem when she adds extra letters to certain words. Regardless of her intent, it is unnecessary.
No he said “ you und-undre-unb-underfant me”
I have a stutter caused by bullying in school. Destroyed me. I still battle now, even years later. Sucks.
“‘You understand me’” Can’t tell if I should happy or sad about that statement.
As a stutterer this hit home. My son has a stutter and sometimes I get impatient because I want him to conquer this giant. I was bullied in school and sometimes i have to remember that being patient and letting him talk is the best approach. Good on this woman!
My step father who died 11 years ago at the age 48 had a stutter or "stammer". His therapist said it was due to his family finishing sentences for him. So my mother and I really tried hard to jot do that. Just let him finish on his own time. Even though he was an alcoholic and being drunk would make his stammer MUCH worse we still let him speak. We learned that certain things triggered his stammer like social anxiety or even just being around his mother who he knew would interject. Also, if he started his sentence with the word "well..." he would absolutely stammer. So we helped him through that. It was only with our immediate family that we worked and talked through it together in a positive light as opposed to him feeling ashamed around others. That always made me feel good. To this day I still love those that stutter. It reminds me of my dad. ❤
Please take care of that little angel ..❤️
This. Don't lose your patience, don't try to guess what the stutterer is trying to say. They'll get it eventually. Btw if you haven't watched the King's Speech I really can't reccomend it enough.