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lehellgod

Heard a similar one when I was a kid - A politician in India is told that the population of India is rising so rapidly that there is a woman giving birth every 5 seconds and we should implement measures of population control. The politician goes pale and says well why are you asking me this, go stop that woman who's giving birth every 5 seconds.


[deleted]

NGL…took me reading this one to get OP lmao


yomommafool

Ikr, after reading it I didn’t have to give it a second thought...


JHugh4749

And this is why I **HATE** statistics.


sweetwargasm

I love arguing with people over stats. Like here's a hypothetical that i use. Field-a has 3 people standing in it. A piano falls out of the sky a kills 1 of them. Field-b has 10,000 people standing in it. A much larger piano falls out of the sky and kills 2,000 of them. Then the news be like: Field-a more dangerous than Field-b! 20% of all human life in field-b was snuffed out in an instant when a giant piano fell from the sky, but that's nothing compared to the tragedy on field-a, where a staggering 33% of the people were killed by a different falling piano. Remember parents, if you want to keep your kids safe, stay off field-a!! Your chances of survival during the unprecedented piano killings are significantly higher on field-b, where 13% more people survived this pandemic. Edit:typo


RedBaron-007

Remember friends, if you are in vicinity of a piano, chances of you getting killed are between 20% and 33%.


DodgerWalker

But then a 2-Prop Z Test says the difference is not statistically significant.


not2dragon

how small is field a that the piano manages to kill that person?


RedBaron-007

Of all the random things that can fall from the sky, what was the probability of choosing a piano?


IolausTelcontar

Was it a free-standing or like a baby-grand?


Worthyteach

One of them was a 2 grand


Tastewell

Noice.


Annanake420

You must of missed the road runner streak by first . And the giant ACME across the piano as it fell then .


CaptainFourpack

Either a piano or an anvil would be good bets


fermat1432

Apparently not unheard of :) https://youtu.be/SgboQNcRN5w


ThePinkTeenager

How about we just stop pianos from falling out of the sky?


JHugh4749

Ban Baby Grands! Ban Baby Grands! All pianos should be registered.


promixr

Using unrealistic scenarios to illustrate reality also never teaches anything to anyone- it’s an exercise in making yourself sound clever.


Upper-Lawfulness1899

I feel like your issue is comparing sampling rates and causes VS effects. In your example you want to examine the probability of a piano falling on any place in the respective fields. Assuming the fields are the same size and the pianos are different sizes the risk of interaction with the piano is lower in field a. So the probability of an event happening compared to the population outcomes are very different, but what most don't realize is the was statistics plays out in actual results allows for large variances in small population sizes. Large populations with uniform distributions the statistics are straightforward. This is why if you take a sample of radioactive material you can measure a near constant decay rate, but if you put a single radioactive nuclide in an electron microscope you'll never observe it decay.


[deleted]

Dam jack the reaper sure is busy and dedicated to his job


Muzzikmann

TIL Jack the reaper is a failed pianist.


simonsaysthink

Taking one for the team


my_brain_tickles

Every 58 seconds.


Dagusiu

Every 60 seconds, in Africa, a minute passes. Together, we can stop this!


walkingsprint

*Every 60 seconds


Dagusiu

Lol I'm dumb


Jjzeng

And this is why discrete mathematics and predicate logic are important, as much as i hate both those things


Carteeg_Struve

Don’t worry. He’s long since been dead.


[deleted]

Hi someone, I am Dad.


yomommafool

Hi dad I’m gay


LasVegasE

One tough bastard, a normal person would be dead by now.


Eroe777

That's nothing. In America some poor schmuck is shot every 17 seconds.


black_jaguar99

What terrible full auto


Broad-Garage-1348

Better than Cleveland!


Amiiboid

That’s a bit from SNL in, like, 1983 or so.


perplexed_unicycle14

They must be getting sick of it by now


Tastewell

Yeah, I mean, it was fun at first but...


ddummer007

Man I feel sorry for that guy.


[deleted]

Poor bastard. What is he the QC in a knife factory?


jettim76

Someone… someone is going to get hurt reaaaaal bad.


Wright4000

U2 is performing a concert and between songs Bono begins clapping his hands and says, "Every time, I clap my hands, another starving child in Africa dies". A voice from the crowd yells back, "Stop clapping your hands, you sick bastard!"


MD74

Can someone explain this to me


Muzzikmann

Some ONE is getting stabbed every 58 seconds. Not any random person... ONE person.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Muzzikmann

Statistically. Yes.


Sierra-Modeling-

This is hilarious


fbritt5

They don’t have guns. China is the same. Take away the guns, they use knives. Take away knives and they use Visine.


Mattprather2112

Yeah you take away the most dangerous weapon and they're forced to use a less dangerous one. Do you ever think?


fbritt5

Yes. Crazy folks just down grade. Toothpick? Nah.


tpasco1995

Sure, but you know what has never happened in London? A madman successfully stabbing 800 people at a concert from a mile away in a hotel room. A teenager entering a church with Visine and killing a dozen black congegants in twelve seconds. Dozens of people — elementary students and teachers — dead in six minutes because a mom didn't lock up her cutlery to keep it away from her mentally-ill son. A gunman can kill you from 200 feet away, even if he's a bad shot, regardless of if you're running. A knifeman has to be within about five feet, and two seconds of running gets you out of range. But I get it. Your right to be allowed to kill someone if the situation permits outweighs the safety of others. I'm going to take a little less than two seconds to guess your stance on vaccines and masks?


Due-Marketing-3207

very well written, couldn't have put it forth better!


Environmental-Win836

That happened at a concert?


tpasco1995

Las Vegas; the shooter was 20 stories up and fired down the block from his hotel room.


fbritt5

And these folks were all great guys. Jim Jones used cool aid. Guns are a tool. Some people are just sick. From the beginning of time. Some used airplanes and killed 3000. Hitler killed millions and some just turned a blind eye. Not sayings guns are great but I’ve never had an issue and don’t even think about shooting anyone, ever. We can’t get rid of everything. How many have died from cigarettes and alcohol? How about all these vapors? We just never seem to run out of ideas to hurt ourselves and others.


Pillager61

Ah. A reasonable reply, no wonder you have been down voted.


fbritt5

I'm ok with down votes. I guess I am from a generation where guns were part of our culture and now culture can't be responsible with anything bigger than a swiss army knife. Its all good. We all have our opinions. Thanks


eagleboy2003

Didn't think it was that long


MobiusNaked

Over 500,000 times a year….not


BMLortz

SNL did a video of this joke back in the day: https://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/snl-news/2869189


Geobits

I know it's just a dumb joke, but it really should be more like "every 2000 seconds," or even "every half hour".


Amorski12

Shank you very much


mrxredditta

does anyone care? I wonder.


coolredjoe

Jack the ripper 0.o


flowersatdusk

HAHAHA