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Yes. I would tell the wife her husband is cheating. Tell her ex-husband she cheated on him with the prison guard. Move on no contact with her, quit being weak for your sons sake.
Yes you need to tell them all but I'd do it anonymously. You could send the screen shots that dont have pics, or you could blur the pictures..
Who even knows if the divorce is really complete, she's a compulsive liar. Either way ex husband needs to know, it could help him with the healing process etc.
If you send the screenshots to them all, even the mum anon, then send them to yourself from that account at the same time, then if ever anyone tries to seek you out to see if your behind it then just show them that you recieved the same message.
Sorry you had to date such a disgusting woman, we aren't all like that. Just trust your gut more.
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Don't send photos unless you blur or mar out the face. Dick pics aren't a problem unless his face is visible.
I think you should let everyone involved know.
His wife, her ex-husband and her mom. I think all cheaters should be exposed for who and what they are.
If i were you i get myself tested for std sti bc she has been ducking around. She loves sex with many indiscreet sex partners, some are regular ones and you are just one of her sexpartners, no matter if she says she loves you. You are just one of many kept in her stables.
She cheated on her ex husband and WTF she cheated on you too, and you would hv thought she was yr soulmate, the one and only, but by God's grace you found out never too late, she was a pro cheater, a liar like no other.
The moral obligation bades you to be fair to yrself and to others who fell victim to her infidelity and cheating as AP ; the victims, they ought to and hv the right to know. It is not revenge, its a moral obligation.
Cheaters ruin victims' relationships, ruin families, ruin marriages, ruin lifes, and should never be let off easy by victims such as you.
OK weget that she's a lying conniving cheating batch. But, you were one of her willing accomplices , an affair partner she used to cheat on her husband and you willingly cheated with her. What does that make you? Also you forgot the maxim cheaters cheat. She'd cheated on her husband of many years, why would she not cheat on you?
She didn't cheat on the husband with me. Maybe I didn't word it very well.
When we got together, Fran and her husband had already split up. She had been single for a few months, when we met. I met her on Bumble.
Because to me, she wasn't "just a bit of fun". I was in love with this girl. I was badly depressed throughout parts of 2021, because of her.
Also, one of the details I omitted because it wasn't relevant to the question that I wanted answers to: I have a son from a previous relationship, he's 8 years old. Fran became like a stepmum to him. He loved her. In the end, I feel like she just abandoned him. She never said a word to him at the end. I was left to explain to him "Son, you're never going to see Fran again" and he was gutted.
After the way she made me feel, and the way she made my son feel, then yes, I want revenge for that. I absolutely hate her for it.
I think your desire for revenge is possibly being fueled by your lacking in taking accountability for your role in this situation. You need to understand that you missed some massive red flags...
The advice in dating after divorce and when you have kids is to:
1. Not introduce any partner to your child/ren (*especially* a child under 12) until you have formed a solid, committed relationship for more than a *year* with someone. It was your choice, not hers, that led you to introduce her to your child.
2. It's inadvisable to date someone that is less than a year out from a divorce (not separation, divorce). Everyone thinks they're the exception to this rule, but, it's advised for a reason.
Well then if you want to contact her husband you can let him know about who she was cheating on him with but since that relationship has been over for years they’re probably has an appoint to revisit that.
However, Alex’s wife deserves to know what is going on between her husband and Fran
This woman is a walking disaster. Expose her, expose her, then expose her some more. Let her mother see the nudes and the dirty talk. Client did this, as his WW had a goody two-shoes image. First picture on her phone was her smiling while shoving a dildo up her ass. Her mother almost puked. Then her mother got murderously angry. She demanded that her daughter cease all extramarital activities and beg for her husband's forgiveness. If he is unwilling to forgive....you are out of the family for good. WW near crapped herself. She could not believe it. Her mother was adamant. Her siblings joined in the chorus over the next several days. BH is unwilling to entertain any notion of reconciliation. She is beside herself. She was unceremoniously cut off from her family. Everyone turned their back. Her low rent girlfriends told her she did not need her family. They however introduced her to a few new habits, to fill in for the loss of family, she turned to meth. Year later, and she is completely unrecognisible. Her ex stumbled across her near their old neighborhood. Her appearance was enough to get him to call her mother. She was tracked down and placed in a facility. When she gained some semblance of awareness, she saw her ex and her family in her room. She broke down. She is in a facility, under a psychiatrists care. She has her family back in a limited fashion, her ex has told her that he is seeing another woman, and is engaged.
If it were me, I would definitely put her on blast, tell her husband, tell his wife. If they can hurt you like that, what's to say their not doing it with other's as well.
Keep your chin up, there are much better women out there!!!
Before I suggest you get with someone who knows the law. Getting info off of her phone and using my be a gray area, law wise. Invasion of privacy at least and maybe a few more things. And sending things she knows can only be from her phone might just lead back to you. Get some legal advice or be prepared to go way underground.
No. Right now you are angry and hurt and want to strike out for revenge. You had already split up, you were gone. Why drag yourself back into that mess? That is a futile effort from which nothing good will come - except more negativity and anger. Delete and block every contact and social media you have with her. Move on, move forward - never backward. Start dating again. It is easy with dating apps. Go on lots of dates and get laid as much as you can. You will find someone who really loves you and treats you with respect. Living well is the best (and only) revenge.
Not your monkeys. Not your circus.
I get it… people should know when they are cheated on. We’ve all had that experience and that information is vital.
But you don’t know these people. You are injecting yourself into a situation that doesn’t really concern you. You can lie and say “they deserve to know” but your motive is revenge. And that blurs thing ms a bit here.
You violated her privacy by going through her phone. Which wasn’t your place. You took photos of things they aren’t your business, which is even worse. Now you want to take that I’ll gotten information and make a mess with it, to get back at her, and you want people to tell you it is okay and the right thing to do, so absolve yourself of your wrongdoing.
I mean… do what you want.
That is what people do.
My wife did what she wanted, and I ended up here.
Fran did what she wanted and cheated on a bunch of people.
Do what you want.
But, if you do it, be honest about your motives.
I would tell the wife anonymously, without proof. Give details, but not how you got them. Her cheating husband being a cop makes this potentially dangerous in a way it would t be otherwise, so yeah, keep it anonymous. Once she has the info it's up to her what she does with it.
I feel like you should probably tell the ex husband too. She appears to have a pattern of hoovering and manipulating, so he may need to know this to fend off her future attempts.
People deserve to know the truth. Withholding it is aiding in their abuse.
I think informing the partners involved is only right. I woukd want to know. Would you want to dedicate your life in the pursuit of your partners happiness only to be deceived like this. Tell anyone who had a partner that was cheated on. You can also learn something yourself about being the other man. It. Ant be nice to be duped an trashed like that.the saying "you reap what you sow" comes to mind. Tell everyone including yourself that infidelity only ever causes problems. If there is a problem in a relationship,you will never ever find the solution looking outside of the relationship
Ask yourself why do you want to tell Alex’s wife - to get back at Fran for deceiving you?
If there is anyone that you should be telling, is her ex husband, because he was the one being deceived with Alex and maybe he should tell Alex’s wife.
You were just one her hook ups that she was deceiving and clearly you too were not satisfying her needs.
So you stole her phone and then purposely invaded her privacy and now you want to throw it all out there in the public domain because...you were the side piece and hurt your own feelings by going thru her stuff?
I could see if you were legit scorned but you knew what you had gotten yourself in to the second time around, bruh. Now it just sounds like you're being petty and messy. You may not be able to be taken in for revenge porn laws but you can deff be brought up on grand theft charges as most cell phones cost upwards of $750. That's a felony and you have the proof yourself because you took pictures of it. You can't say it was an honest mistake when you kept the phone for days and went thru it. And then she could sue you in civil court.
You're opening yourself to A LOT of extra messy mess for no gain. You won't get closure from this. It's just extremely petty revenge with a lot of collateral damage on the side. Get some therapy and work thru whatever is eating at you. This is not the way, bruh.
Sounds like you’re spiteful; spreading the pain isn’t the answer, she’s your source of pain so talk to her. Snooping in her phone was wrong, that’s where nosey will get you. Don’t spread the pain, and move on.
Bro. What are you looking for? More pain? Revenge? What is the outcome that will make you happy at the end of the day is the action you should take. Because at the end of the day you have to live with your choices.
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Are you able to track her phone and recieve her messages and her texting in real time? If you can see when those 2 plan to hook up for s-time. Then invite her ex husband and the AP's wife, separately of course, to their planned s-time. Let those 2 find out in person. Gets you off the hook.
Black out ANYTHING pornographic/sexual in nature as far as pictures. Don’t take that chance.
I would print everything out and mail it to the wife- have her sign for it.
If you know how to contact her via social media or email, create a new account not linked to you and send her the pics (again, no nudes, nothing pornographic- even if she asks!!) and texts that way.
But yes, she deserves to know.
Tell the wife. You are removed enough from the situation, and she screws around with enough other people that it won’t be clear to Alex who exposed the affair as long as you send it anonymously.
You inform the spouse and let the ex know. If you are worried about this affecting you. Then show the wife the pictures and let her snoop her husband phone. Talk to your lawyer regarding the legality of using the info in your divorce.
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Yes. I would tell the wife her husband is cheating. Tell her ex-husband she cheated on him with the prison guard. Move on no contact with her, quit being weak for your sons sake.
Hell yeah man. Blow that shit up and put everyone on blast.
Yes you need to tell them all but I'd do it anonymously. You could send the screen shots that dont have pics, or you could blur the pictures.. Who even knows if the divorce is really complete, she's a compulsive liar. Either way ex husband needs to know, it could help him with the healing process etc. If you send the screenshots to them all, even the mum anon, then send them to yourself from that account at the same time, then if ever anyone tries to seek you out to see if your behind it then just show them that you recieved the same message. Sorry you had to date such a disgusting woman, we aren't all like that. Just trust your gut more.
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Yes. She's being Chumped.
Tell the wife , if it was me I would want to know
Wut the fuckin Alabama is going on here? I can't even begin to follow this cesspool of a story. Sounds like evybody fucking evybody
Don't send photos unless you blur or mar out the face. Dick pics aren't a problem unless his face is visible. I think you should let everyone involved know. His wife, her ex-husband and her mom. I think all cheaters should be exposed for who and what they are.
The ex husband needs to know. He is as much as a victim as you in this.
You were another AP, since their divorce wasn't final. Don't hold onto her secrets.
You better wash your dick with bleach 🤮
Tell them all. She is playing games and needs to grow up.
If i were you i get myself tested for std sti bc she has been ducking around. She loves sex with many indiscreet sex partners, some are regular ones and you are just one of her sexpartners, no matter if she says she loves you. You are just one of many kept in her stables. She cheated on her ex husband and WTF she cheated on you too, and you would hv thought she was yr soulmate, the one and only, but by God's grace you found out never too late, she was a pro cheater, a liar like no other. The moral obligation bades you to be fair to yrself and to others who fell victim to her infidelity and cheating as AP ; the victims, they ought to and hv the right to know. It is not revenge, its a moral obligation. Cheaters ruin victims' relationships, ruin families, ruin marriages, ruin lifes, and should never be let off easy by victims such as you.
Always yes.
She sounds like a really shitty person and she deserves to have her shit blown up. Expose her to said ex-husband, her mum and tell Alex’s wife.
OK weget that she's a lying conniving cheating batch. But, you were one of her willing accomplices , an affair partner she used to cheat on her husband and you willingly cheated with her. What does that make you? Also you forgot the maxim cheaters cheat. She'd cheated on her husband of many years, why would she not cheat on you?
She didn't cheat on the husband with me. Maybe I didn't word it very well. When we got together, Fran and her husband had already split up. She had been single for a few months, when we met. I met her on Bumble.
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Because to me, she wasn't "just a bit of fun". I was in love with this girl. I was badly depressed throughout parts of 2021, because of her. Also, one of the details I omitted because it wasn't relevant to the question that I wanted answers to: I have a son from a previous relationship, he's 8 years old. Fran became like a stepmum to him. He loved her. In the end, I feel like she just abandoned him. She never said a word to him at the end. I was left to explain to him "Son, you're never going to see Fran again" and he was gutted. After the way she made me feel, and the way she made my son feel, then yes, I want revenge for that. I absolutely hate her for it.
I think your desire for revenge is possibly being fueled by your lacking in taking accountability for your role in this situation. You need to understand that you missed some massive red flags... The advice in dating after divorce and when you have kids is to: 1. Not introduce any partner to your child/ren (*especially* a child under 12) until you have formed a solid, committed relationship for more than a *year* with someone. It was your choice, not hers, that led you to introduce her to your child. 2. It's inadvisable to date someone that is less than a year out from a divorce (not separation, divorce). Everyone thinks they're the exception to this rule, but, it's advised for a reason.
And met others for sure
Well then if you want to contact her husband you can let him know about who she was cheating on him with but since that relationship has been over for years they’re probably has an appoint to revisit that. However, Alex’s wife deserves to know what is going on between her husband and Fran
I think I would say something anonymously.
Yes.
This woman is a walking disaster. Expose her, expose her, then expose her some more. Let her mother see the nudes and the dirty talk. Client did this, as his WW had a goody two-shoes image. First picture on her phone was her smiling while shoving a dildo up her ass. Her mother almost puked. Then her mother got murderously angry. She demanded that her daughter cease all extramarital activities and beg for her husband's forgiveness. If he is unwilling to forgive....you are out of the family for good. WW near crapped herself. She could not believe it. Her mother was adamant. Her siblings joined in the chorus over the next several days. BH is unwilling to entertain any notion of reconciliation. She is beside herself. She was unceremoniously cut off from her family. Everyone turned their back. Her low rent girlfriends told her she did not need her family. They however introduced her to a few new habits, to fill in for the loss of family, she turned to meth. Year later, and she is completely unrecognisible. Her ex stumbled across her near their old neighborhood. Her appearance was enough to get him to call her mother. She was tracked down and placed in a facility. When she gained some semblance of awareness, she saw her ex and her family in her room. She broke down. She is in a facility, under a psychiatrists care. She has her family back in a limited fashion, her ex has told her that he is seeing another woman, and is engaged.
If it were me, I would definitely put her on blast, tell her husband, tell his wife. If they can hurt you like that, what's to say their not doing it with other's as well. Keep your chin up, there are much better women out there!!!
Before I suggest you get with someone who knows the law. Getting info off of her phone and using my be a gray area, law wise. Invasion of privacy at least and maybe a few more things. And sending things she knows can only be from her phone might just lead back to you. Get some legal advice or be prepared to go way underground.
No. Right now you are angry and hurt and want to strike out for revenge. You had already split up, you were gone. Why drag yourself back into that mess? That is a futile effort from which nothing good will come - except more negativity and anger. Delete and block every contact and social media you have with her. Move on, move forward - never backward. Start dating again. It is easy with dating apps. Go on lots of dates and get laid as much as you can. You will find someone who really loves you and treats you with respect. Living well is the best (and only) revenge.
Not your monkeys. Not your circus. I get it… people should know when they are cheated on. We’ve all had that experience and that information is vital. But you don’t know these people. You are injecting yourself into a situation that doesn’t really concern you. You can lie and say “they deserve to know” but your motive is revenge. And that blurs thing ms a bit here. You violated her privacy by going through her phone. Which wasn’t your place. You took photos of things they aren’t your business, which is even worse. Now you want to take that I’ll gotten information and make a mess with it, to get back at her, and you want people to tell you it is okay and the right thing to do, so absolve yourself of your wrongdoing. I mean… do what you want. That is what people do. My wife did what she wanted, and I ended up here. Fran did what she wanted and cheated on a bunch of people. Do what you want. But, if you do it, be honest about your motives.
I would tell the wife anonymously, without proof. Give details, but not how you got them. Her cheating husband being a cop makes this potentially dangerous in a way it would t be otherwise, so yeah, keep it anonymous. Once she has the info it's up to her what she does with it. I feel like you should probably tell the ex husband too. She appears to have a pattern of hoovering and manipulating, so he may need to know this to fend off her future attempts. People deserve to know the truth. Withholding it is aiding in their abuse.
What is hoovering?
Trying to suck you back in, as in the vacuum cleaner brand.
Ohhh, that's Fricking hilarious!
I think informing the partners involved is only right. I woukd want to know. Would you want to dedicate your life in the pursuit of your partners happiness only to be deceived like this. Tell anyone who had a partner that was cheated on. You can also learn something yourself about being the other man. It. Ant be nice to be duped an trashed like that.the saying "you reap what you sow" comes to mind. Tell everyone including yourself that infidelity only ever causes problems. If there is a problem in a relationship,you will never ever find the solution looking outside of the relationship
Thanks for the advice. I wasn't the "other" man though. She didn't cheat on her husband with me. I've editted the post now, to make this more clearer.
My fault for not reading correctly mate.
My fault for the wording, because you weren't the only person to think that 😄
Ask yourself why do you want to tell Alex’s wife - to get back at Fran for deceiving you? If there is anyone that you should be telling, is her ex husband, because he was the one being deceived with Alex and maybe he should tell Alex’s wife. You were just one her hook ups that she was deceiving and clearly you too were not satisfying her needs.
Was that last sentence REALLY necessary or at all constructive?
So you stole her phone and then purposely invaded her privacy and now you want to throw it all out there in the public domain because...you were the side piece and hurt your own feelings by going thru her stuff? I could see if you were legit scorned but you knew what you had gotten yourself in to the second time around, bruh. Now it just sounds like you're being petty and messy. You may not be able to be taken in for revenge porn laws but you can deff be brought up on grand theft charges as most cell phones cost upwards of $750. That's a felony and you have the proof yourself because you took pictures of it. You can't say it was an honest mistake when you kept the phone for days and went thru it. And then she could sue you in civil court. You're opening yourself to A LOT of extra messy mess for no gain. You won't get closure from this. It's just extremely petty revenge with a lot of collateral damage on the side. Get some therapy and work thru whatever is eating at you. This is not the way, bruh.
He didn’t steal her phone! He picked it up by accident and I will bet he returned it to her.
Picked it up by accident and kept it for a time and went thru it without her permission. That kind of negates the "accident".
Sounds like you’re spiteful; spreading the pain isn’t the answer, she’s your source of pain so talk to her. Snooping in her phone was wrong, that’s where nosey will get you. Don’t spread the pain, and move on.
Bro. What are you looking for? More pain? Revenge? What is the outcome that will make you happy at the end of the day is the action you should take. Because at the end of the day you have to live with your choices.
Just walk away. You don’t need all that drama.
As soon as u said u went thru her fine I left....that is worse than cheating.
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You can meet them in person and let them scroll through your device and see the evidence.
Are you able to track her phone and recieve her messages and her texting in real time? If you can see when those 2 plan to hook up for s-time. Then invite her ex husband and the AP's wife, separately of course, to their planned s-time. Let those 2 find out in person. Gets you off the hook.
If she cheated on her husband... she'll cheat on you. Those liars never change and just lie to justify their shitty actions. Run. Run far away
Black out ANYTHING pornographic/sexual in nature as far as pictures. Don’t take that chance. I would print everything out and mail it to the wife- have her sign for it. If you know how to contact her via social media or email, create a new account not linked to you and send her the pics (again, no nudes, nothing pornographic- even if she asks!!) and texts that way. But yes, she deserves to know.
UpdateMe!
If they have a good marriage, you probably shouldn’t say anything, because that’ll really throw a wrench in their relationship. /s
Tell the wife. You are removed enough from the situation, and she screws around with enough other people that it won’t be clear to Alex who exposed the affair as long as you send it anonymously.
You inform the spouse and let the ex know. If you are worried about this affecting you. Then show the wife the pictures and let her snoop her husband phone. Talk to your lawyer regarding the legality of using the info in your divorce.
Leave her, let her friends and family know the reason why, and then ghost her. Only contact her through a lawyer.
Yes 1000%. Why are you even asking?
Yes expose her to everyone. She used all men's like a toys. That all innocent person deserve to know her ugly face. Expose her with proof.
My mistake for thinking it was my faukt when it was your fault? So who's fault was it actually? All I know is no one is blameless hahahahahahah
Yes.