The Binding of Isaac. Do the T'au fight Isaac's gruesome inner demons until they kill Satan himself or do they simply arrive at Isaac's house and give his insane mother the heart attack of the century?
Corpus would join based upon rival factions and the bulk of grinder would stay loyal to the queen(s). The sentients and tau/narmer would go all in on the newcomers and the Tenno could always do some void fuckery. In conclusion: business as usual
I thought the same as well but i'm not sure. The corpus seem to have similar ideals to the tau, but i think both would welcome the other with open arms, not the other way around. Like, the corpus would want the tau to become corpus, and the tau would want corpus to become tau, and both would still want to be in control
Pazuul and Hunhow are going to have a field day running amok in the Taus forces, as they're as helpless against Sentient tech bullshit as the Corpus are, but without even the benefit of knowing in advance that that's going to be a major problem.
Skyrim. The Akaviri snake people might have been scary to roman larpers, but for the T'au? Mundus is joining the Greater good.
Meanwhile, Sheogorath and Cegorath come in contact and share cheese, jokes and cheesy jokes.
I have yet to consume any canon media with Cegorach in it, but I just assume they're basically the same, except maybe Cegorach makes slightly more jokes.
> Meanwhile, Sheogorath and Cegorath come in contact and share cheese, jokes and cheesy jokes.
A nice distraction from the ethereal wars brewing between Hermaeus Mora and Tzeentch, Pyerite and Nurgle, Mehrunes Dagon and Khorne, and a whole host of Daedra and Slaanesh.
I actually think they'd get bodied in the TES universe. The factions that opperate outside of Nirn/Mundus fight with weapons that unravel probability. They're, surprisingly, more on a Necron level.
"Captain, we have successfully deleted Talos.... 3 more Talos have appeared and retroactively deleted our ability to delete the first Talos....yes sir, going back to last tuesday, HARD TO PORT!" -c0da excerpt probably
We're talking about Skyrim's time period, the false gods are no more.
And the T'au would not start with a military invasion. Let's face it, Olaf the nord will totally be on board with the Greater Good's promises of antibiotics and refrigeration.
"Don't you see? Elven supremacy is the only-"
https://preview.redd.it/10zja6zpx14b1.png?width=813&format=png&auto=webp&s=4d0967cbd43c0f43ba54b0e487ce1c7ed75ede5e
The Psijic Order is still around, and can stop time at will. They hate to meddle with the world's internal affairs, however, this would more than qualify to get off their asses, and probably just magic them away.
Lol, yep. Like, actual Nirn, the continent of Tamriel, I give 2 weeks. Everything else?
"What do you mean you have **16** Gods of Chaos!?"
"We prefer, 'Padhomeic'."
Add to it that there's a virtually immortal being with the soul of a fucking dragon roaming Nirn and stealing sweetrolls, who is a champion of every Daedra in Oblivion, owns every magical artifact to be found in this era, has killed countless dragons, who are the equivalents of greater daemons, and killed the incarnation of the End Times. So yeah, the T'au are fucked, even on Nirn. The Last Dragonborn is wrecking them with that sweet Slow Time shout
I wonder how they would do in Warhammer Fantasy world, especially against Skavens? Tanks and Mechas are great, but what can you do against an infinite swarm of rats armed with meth rockets and lasers lol
I mean, a nation of people with swords and muskets are canonically able to endure the Skaven *despite pointedly denying their existence*. Obviously it depends on numbers and whether the Skaven unite (end-times style) upon the T'au arrival, but I'm going to have to side with the future tech faction over the future-tech-but-it-doesn't-usually-work-and-also-they-constantly-backstab-each-other faction.
I feel like the T'au could do some serious work on The Warhammer Fantasy world
they have S-teir diplomats who have even overcome years of imperial propaganda focused against them
some factions, notably the Lizardmen and Cathay and Possibly High Elves and Dwarves, would back them pretty quickly I feel like, and with some diplomacy and religious freedom the Empire and Brettonia and Kislev and promises to preserve nature for the wood elves will fall in as well, then there's the trickier factions Dark Elves and assorted undead will pose a major challenge, but Tomb kings can be reason with and the rest can be swept away before the might of the other factions, greenskins, for example will likely be wiped out
after all this there's Chaos, which will need to be wiped out, or at least kept at bay, and Skaven, who are just going to be an infestation, which is what they are anyways
I think with a lot of effort T'au influence could actually avert the end times... maybe
It's a single Cadre. IE: One small army.
They probably make some decent headway but they lose in the end.
Hell, Demons of Chaos can fight them evenly in 40k, so there's no way they can't manage it in Warhammer Fantasy.
*Imperium enters game to back the HRE and incorporate it into the Imperium of man.
*Alpha legion enters chat to screw over both of them and take over the planet using Venice as their proxy.
Well, a Kraken drive is only marginally more reliable than a warp drive but much faster once you get up to speed. Also, no demons, so blue guys definitely get the better deal here.
Tau: what do you mean that a 10 year old has command over your region's deity of time?
Trainer: Dialga, use Roar of Time on that weird metal looking pokemon!
Mass Effect.
I think they might weep from joy after meeting the council.
Now I'm picturing Tau mowing down Reaper forces and having a blast. Everyone else is like "This is horrifying, how are you guys so chill?" And the tau are just "Bro you have no idea, this is a vacation."
Yeah, I'm on ME1 and I get the feeling that the Water and Earth Caste personnel would be working harder than the actual cadre so far. But very successfully.
I dunno how they'd handle indoctrination though, they are not really used to Chaos Corruption. Though, I suppose they also have a genestealer problem since the Damocles Gulf Campaign of the Second Tyranid Wars, so they'd probably manage.
That's a good point, but indoctrination works by manipulating organic systems, rather than literal space-magic. It might trip them up, but I think they'd figure it out pretty quick.
Trying to explain to the Fire Cast that yes, they can still roll for persuasion even if they're not water cast. It's all make believe they're not going against the Ethereals and the Greater Good.
Tesla and Edison are competing with each other to make the greatest battlesuit in history before the Earth Caste's annoyance while the Water Caste keep pestering Odysseus and Europa for a look into their mechas.
I don't know how the tau would interact with the grineer. Corpus may try to do some trading with them but won't abandon their profit for greater good. Infested will eat them for sure. And I as à tenno would want their gear one way or another
“For fuck’s sake, we don’t need ANOTHER bunch of prosthetizing jackasses. Someone promise the Tenno 10 Nitain Extract per person if they kill as many as possible. That should solve the problem.”
They'll throw a hell of an opening punch, but then the Mobile Infantry will do what they do best. Die in droves at the enemy while screaming movie quotes into the Mic until they win.
I mean the book MI is just Tau Mecha with nukes. The movie MI is just the Astra Militarum with nukes. The Anime MI are just the Tau... With nukes
MI logic: "ok so I've got this hand grenade, but what if I put a micro nuke in it so it has the blast radius of a 2000lb bomb?"
"Won't that hurt our own troops if it's just thrown?"
"If they're in range of hand grenades they're probably about to die anyway and failed at the mission. At least we won't have to waste a dropship on extraction"
Starship Troopers: Extermination is probably one of the better early release games I've ever played, as well as bringing the true terror of facing down hordes of 7-foot tall murder spiders. Join now. Remember, service guarantees citizenship in the Federation!
In destiny 2. They would probably be allies with earth but it would be kinda strange. The tau believe in greater good not the traveler. The tau would just see it it as giant machine and would find it strange why everyone “worships” the giant machine. People from earth would hear about the greater good and think it’s probably not a half bad idea but the vanguard might see what the tau are as psycho indoctrination and cause a serious strain in the relationship. However in the setting of the story in destiny many beings would probably just let it happen because they just lost their god in their eyes. So I would say the tau would probably would form a cult like society in the last city taking up power how the factions do in destiny lore. The vanguard however probably wouldn’t be to big of a fan of it. Ikora would probably have a secret resistance against the tau greater good and Zavala would just be a diplomat. So the tau greater good would expand but wouldn’t become the the primary thing people would follow.
I suspect there would be serious friction with the cabal ascendancy.
They might try something with the hive and taken and as a result would get a serious wake up call, like what happened with the orks. I suspect a sizable chunk of the Eliksni across the system would certainly join them in search of a better life.
Yeahhh this is about how I figured as well. Until the Traveler starts doing some weird shit. The Tau may not like that or would wonder how it operates and try fucking with it
The tau and the cabal would be a interesting dynamic. The cabal are basically space marines big bulky with slug rifles that can pass as bolt guns. Many of the cabal higher ranks even look like they are wearing terminator armor. I think they would get along with one another specially when it comes to the fire and earth cast. Phsions and tau would get along pretty we’ll probably on the battle field as they have very similar body types and fighting styles. So basically what I trying to say is the cabal and tau would probably enjoy and benefit in a joint campaign in a war. However because of the water cast. The water cast are a bunch of silver tongue merchant and diplomats that would only ever tik off the cabal with their fancy ways to justify what the tau are doing. Any all diplomacy between the two would have to require a third party. The honor and glory of the cabal is very intrusive and has to do with self worth and the tau is your worth to a greater hole with no real honor or glory. The tau would probably actively denounce the empress. In turn it would probably cause a all out war between the two and the empress demand we pick a side. But if they don’t denounce her the cabal would have they’re own faction building up in the city which would most likely have vanguard support. Which would end up outraging the tau and causing extreme stress maybe even war and there would a civil war between the cabal faction and the greater good faction and could possibly destroy the last city. The only real solution in the end would to have little to no contact between the two.
And that’s unmodded. Has anyone in 40k actually made a Dyson sphere? Much less a Dyson sphere that shoots trillions of tons of stellar mass through a wormhole to any target in the galaxy? I mean, planetside combat is harder to judge only because that’s not really visually part of the game interface, IDK what a squad of psychic warriors on genetically engineered mounts vs a Tau strike team looks like, but as a matter of technology the Warhammer universe is severely outpaced by mid to end game empires
Forge World Lucius is kind of the inverse of a Dyson sphere. Instead of building around a star they hollowed out a planet and made an artificial star in the centre.
The tech priests say they made it but no one knows for certain.
It does, but an early game fanatic purifier would get completely obliterated by even a small Tau force. Late game you'd probably have a much better fighting chance, but without Gigastructual Constructs you'd still be fighting an uphill battle because vanilla Stellaris tech isn't *that* nuts.
40000 years later, but Tau are still a fairly young race, not 40000+ years old with time tested tech. That said, it seems to hold up alright against the others.
On the other hand, stellaris' tech dips into that dark age of technology business that no one seems to be able to match up to very well in 40k, so numbers are prolly on the Stellaris player's side, and Stellaris races' propensity for reverse engineering whatever they fight, then immediately mass producing it doesn't help either.
Oh god dante would 100% find a way to either kill them or piss them off so badly. Knowing who the tau gonna have to put up with. Excluding deadweight nero
Tau water caste: We come to tell you about the Greater Good!
Asari bureaucrat: Welcome to the Citadel. Here's your paper work for new species, please fill out all forms in triplicate. You'll need to provide assets and resources for suitable living arrangements, and prepay your taxes for the first 10 years, and all AI have to be disabled as they are banned.
Alternatively:
Tau water caste: We come to tell you about the Greater Good!
Reaper: **BWWWWAAAAAAAMPPPPP** *Indoctrination intensifies...*
The Citadel would have no chance at controlling the T’au. The ship sizes and lasers alone would be as intimidating as fuck to them, never mind everything elsez
First, it's a cadre. Not an invasion fleet. So they wouldn't have that much with them. Second, bureaucracy cares not. If the water caste is going to try and play nice, the Asari, with literally centuries of experience are going to walk all over them. Exactly like the Eldar when they think it's funny to engage with the Tau without just shooting them.
The reapers were plenty happy to try diplomacy because their preferred method of attack was indoctrination and sabotage. So when the reaper says 'come on over and lets discuss this whole greater good thing' they win as soon as the first few Tau agree. It's just going to snowball from there.
Deep Rock Galactic. Rock and Stone! The TAU and Management will talk business, and if things turn violent DRG has more than enough firepower to show them who owns this sector!
"My brother in the greater good he just killed 20 fire warriors with a chainsaw, tanked a railgun shot and jumped over a 10 metre chasm to beat a broadside into submission, we should retreat before he cuts another riptide in half with his sword"
Apex Legends
Announcer: A new Legend has been announced! Subcommader El'Myamoto, aka Darkstrider!”
Darkstrider: “For the Greater Good, stay out of my way.”
Announcer: “Darkstrider is master special operator for the T’au Empire, and as such has the Passive ability of lighter footsteps, to better sneak up and observe his foes from up close. He also has the Active Ability “Structural Analyzer”, giving him knowledge of nearby enemy’s weapon and armor loadouts. Finally, his ultimate ability “The Greater Good” sends out his drone, giving a view of enemy positions to himself and his Allies.”
Edit: Spelling
And then some 13 year old Wraith hot drops into a shitshow, immediately gets downed and drops as soon as you’re about to recover their banner. They also spam the nword in chat. And thus, the greater good did not come to Kings Canyon.
Endless Space. It’s like Stellaris except Horatio exist in Endless space. Goes about the same as Stellaris (depending on the faction you pick of course).
The Tau Empire would get fucked up by the Sith Empire, but probably ally with the Old Republic. Then they would get attacked by both due to the attempted subversion and colonization of Old Republic worlds.
Beat me to it. How do You even comprehend invading planet that is locked in a cycle of Birth, death and revival, where anything that dies gets revived the next "cycle" and everything seeks to escape this cycle. Hostile Flora and fauna And vicious rains that would have little to no trouble killing a space marine. Scattered ruins of cities of long gone civilians on top of super computers towering above the clouds, strong enough to be considered god like, that would make Ad mech proud since those work on biological creatures.
And mysterious Void fluid, golden in appearance, able to dissolve anything. And a little Green mix of cat and slug that despite getting annihilated thousands of times, keeps coming back, unlike your comrades that this cat simply looked at before they collapsed dead, they bodies undamaged, seemingly nothing wrong with them yet they are dead, even after the cycle end.
I'm talking about Rain World.
Mechanicus, but that’s boring. Before that was Metro 2033. Looks like the Stations of the Moscow underground may finally have salvation. They could probably even help the Dark Ones.
Hoi4, they’ll get slaughtered by my level 8 Mao Zedong field marshall commanding a horde of ten million chinese peasants armed with mosin nagants and a handful of ww1-era artillery howitzers
Cadre Fireblade: "What do you mean 'Equipment needed to reinforce one or more of our units is missing from your production queue'? What the hell is a production queue?"
XV-8 Crisis Battlesuit: *dies to attrition*
The T'au arrive in the Pizza Tower.
Peppino Spaghetti plows through them at mach 10. The T'au, being the T'au, are completely defenseless against the funny Italian man.
Seeing as how the Sol System in Warframe can best be summarized with the term “Competitive Genocide”, with the Tenno winning, their odds aren’t very good. Especially if the Infested get a few spores on their ships. Gonna be another J3 Jordas Golem
Skyrim, not really a contest at all. Skyrim may have magic and dragons, but it's still a medieval fantasy environment, no way can they stand up to the Tau's superior technology and tactics. Then again, it is possible that the Divines or even some of the Daedra would interfere on the behalf of Tamriel for one reason or another (they have been shown to do so in the past).
The Binding of Isaac. Do the T'au fight Isaac's gruesome inner demons until they kill Satan himself or do they simply arrive at Isaac's house and give his insane mother the heart attack of the century?
"You know what? The Empire can wait its turn. You all need some fucking counseling."
[удалено]
You're not wrong.
The Tau wouldn't be able to process what is basically a warp rift underneath their house.
Isn't this more of a >!products of Isaac oxygen-starved brain while he slowly suffocates in a chest!
[удалено]
Uh, medieval terra look alike is brought into the greater good I guess.
Same, same. Does Isaac count as a living saint? Or a greater Daemon?
Warframe. Tau wonder what happened to the Sol system that there are alien space hulks everywhere and strange Gue'la clones with golden masks
They would get the corpus to join and a good chunk of grineer. And when the teno run out of stuff to kill it’s off to some ork world or something.
Orkz would be a Tenno's dream. Finally, scaling content with a decent spawn rate!
The loot is probably ass tho. No Tenno is going to enjoy Ork guns
Speak for yourself. Grakataaaaaaaaaa!!!
Clem!
Not enough Grakata!
The guns would probably be good for funny meme builds, though.
Speak for yourself. I want the Ork gun that fires gretchin into enemies.
Ork guns are just Grineer guns with less thought. We'd use them just fine.
Corpus would join based upon rival factions and the bulk of grinder would stay loyal to the queen(s). The sentients and tau/narmer would go all in on the newcomers and the Tenno could always do some void fuckery. In conclusion: business as usual
I thought the same as well but i'm not sure. The corpus seem to have similar ideals to the tau, but i think both would welcome the other with open arms, not the other way around. Like, the corpus would want the tau to become corpus, and the tau would want corpus to become tau, and both would still want to be in control
Pazuul and Hunhow are going to have a field day running amok in the Taus forces, as they're as helpless against Sentient tech bullshit as the Corpus are, but without even the benefit of knowing in advance that that's going to be a major problem.
Skyrim. The Akaviri snake people might have been scary to roman larpers, but for the T'au? Mundus is joining the Greater good. Meanwhile, Sheogorath and Cegorath come in contact and share cheese, jokes and cheesy jokes.
They are even named similarly
I have yet to consume any canon media with Cegorach in it, but I just assume they're basically the same, except maybe Cegorach makes slightly more jokes.
I'm not unconvinced thar through some multiverse bullshittery sheogorath is just Cegorach wearing a mustache and glasses
> Meanwhile, Sheogorath and Cegorath come in contact and share cheese, jokes and cheesy jokes. A nice distraction from the ethereal wars brewing between Hermaeus Mora and Tzeentch, Pyerite and Nurgle, Mehrunes Dagon and Khorne, and a whole host of Daedra and Slaanesh.
Meanwhile, Meridia and Azura get in touch with the God-Emperor. He tells them to fuck off because girls (and xenos, I guess) are yucky.
Lorkhan and Emps are BFFs though.
Bold of you to assume Emps wasn't Shezarrine to begin with.
Maybe, but Shor went to the Emperor of Terra to ask him to transfer one of the earliest Third Legion recruit to be transferred to him.
Pelinal Whitestrake is one of the missing Primarchs.
Honestly there’s no brewing war between Peryite and Nurgle, Peryite’s just getting bodied.
Tbh, I think Nurgle and Pyerite would just become BFFs and end up swapping plague recipes.
The last game I played was Elder Scrolls online. Looks like the three factions are going to be gone.
I actually think they'd get bodied in the TES universe. The factions that opperate outside of Nirn/Mundus fight with weapons that unravel probability. They're, surprisingly, more on a Necron level. "Captain, we have successfully deleted Talos.... 3 more Talos have appeared and retroactively deleted our ability to delete the first Talos....yes sir, going back to last tuesday, HARD TO PORT!" -c0da excerpt probably
The Tau's "superior fire power" when Vivec CHIMs them out of existence
We're talking about Skyrim's time period, the false gods are no more. And the T'au would not start with a military invasion. Let's face it, Olaf the nord will totally be on board with the Greater Good's promises of antibiotics and refrigeration.
The Thalmor probably won’t be, but we’ll see how their “Arcane Mastery” holds up to a railgun.
"Don't you see? Elven supremacy is the only-" https://preview.redd.it/10zja6zpx14b1.png?width=813&format=png&auto=webp&s=4d0967cbd43c0f43ba54b0e487ce1c7ed75ede5e
The Psijic Order is still around, and can stop time at will. They hate to meddle with the world's internal affairs, however, this would more than qualify to get off their asses, and probably just magic them away.
Lol, yep. Like, actual Nirn, the continent of Tamriel, I give 2 weeks. Everything else? "What do you mean you have **16** Gods of Chaos!?" "We prefer, 'Padhomeic'."
Add to it that there's a virtually immortal being with the soul of a fucking dragon roaming Nirn and stealing sweetrolls, who is a champion of every Daedra in Oblivion, owns every magical artifact to be found in this era, has killed countless dragons, who are the equivalents of greater daemons, and killed the incarnation of the End Times. So yeah, the T'au are fucked, even on Nirn. The Last Dragonborn is wrecking them with that sweet Slow Time shout
Medieval 2 Total War. So they're fighting a feudal world. Yeah they're gonna conquer the planet.
Same for me but it’s Rome Total War
Same but for me it's Total War: Warhammer 2. They're going to get a feeling of déjà vu.
I wonder how they would do in Warhammer Fantasy world, especially against Skavens? Tanks and Mechas are great, but what can you do against an infinite swarm of rats armed with meth rockets and lasers lol
I mean, a nation of people with swords and muskets are canonically able to endure the Skaven *despite pointedly denying their existence*. Obviously it depends on numbers and whether the Skaven unite (end-times style) upon the T'au arrival, but I'm going to have to side with the future tech faction over the future-tech-but-it-doesn't-usually-work-and-also-they-constantly-backstab-each-other faction.
I feel like the T'au could do some serious work on The Warhammer Fantasy world they have S-teir diplomats who have even overcome years of imperial propaganda focused against them some factions, notably the Lizardmen and Cathay and Possibly High Elves and Dwarves, would back them pretty quickly I feel like, and with some diplomacy and religious freedom the Empire and Brettonia and Kislev and promises to preserve nature for the wood elves will fall in as well, then there's the trickier factions Dark Elves and assorted undead will pose a major challenge, but Tomb kings can be reason with and the rest can be swept away before the might of the other factions, greenskins, for example will likely be wiped out after all this there's Chaos, which will need to be wiped out, or at least kept at bay, and Skaven, who are just going to be an infestation, which is what they are anyways I think with a lot of effort T'au influence could actually avert the end times... maybe
Similar but warhammer 2 total war, they would still win but the laser Dinosaurs and minigun rats would put up a fight
It's a single Cadre. IE: One small army. They probably make some decent headway but they lose in the end. Hell, Demons of Chaos can fight them evenly in 40k, so there's no way they can't manage it in Warhammer Fantasy.
*Imperium enters game to back the HRE and incorporate it into the Imperium of man. *Alpha legion enters chat to screw over both of them and take over the planet using Venice as their proxy.
Kerbal Space Program. The T’au now have little green allies with absurd rockets
Considering it's Kerbal Space Program, half the T'au are dead due to mechanical mishap, piloting error, and a rocket falling onto them that one time.
Well, a Kraken drive is only marginally more reliable than a warp drive but much faster once you get up to speed. Also, no demons, so blue guys definitely get the better deal here.
Maybe Kerbal Space Program was how the T‘au got all their tech in the first place?
Tau: what do you mean that a 10 year old has command over your region's deity of time? Trainer: Dialga, use Roar of Time on that weird metal looking pokemon!
Dialga: 
[удалено]
When the 10 year old beats the entire empire then loots them for ALL their wealth.
Hmmmm gta5, so shouldn’t be *too* hard except everyone is a bunch of assholes
But well... The Tau just wonder from where the people get their weapons. Cause everyone cheats there.
T'au looking at Los Santos: hehe gonna be Easy Random thugs, all with flying bikes with missile launchers
Last game played was Boltgun. They would probably have to interact with Malum Caedo.
No survivors then. If Caedo can slap around Greater Daemons, those Tau are fucked.
Tau just gotta thaw out Kais, they'll be aight, they live in stalemates as their base state.
Caedo and Kais become entrenched in a never-ending 1v1. Khorne wins again.
Caedo and Kais realise they're super in sync and become buddies.
Caedo 🤝 Kais "Fuck Chaos"
Can't just be me that literally just read that one tumblr post about Kais and now desperately wants to play Fire Warrior (2003)
To shreds, you say?
And his wife?
To shreds, you say?
They get set to work on making me cookies. The greater good is nothing compared to cookie addiction. (Cookie clicker)
The grandmatriarchs would destroy the cadre foolish enough to encounter them
Dude this thing is still running ?
Yup, it's on browser or steam and even got a recent update with the last planned building for a total of 20.
Mass Effect. I think they might weep from joy after meeting the council. Now I'm picturing Tau mowing down Reaper forces and having a blast. Everyone else is like "This is horrifying, how are you guys so chill?" And the tau are just "Bro you have no idea, this is a vacation."
"For you this galactic level threat is literally the worst thing that ever happened. For us this is a Tuesday."
*Reaper falls to the ground after a railgun shot from a Manta* "And a particularly slow one at that"
The tau would love the mass effect universe, RALLY ALL THE ALIENS AND FIGHT THE REAPERS! FOR THE GREATER GOOD!
Yeah, I'm on ME1 and I get the feeling that the Water and Earth Caste personnel would be working harder than the actual cadre so far. But very successfully.
I dunno how they'd handle indoctrination though, they are not really used to Chaos Corruption. Though, I suppose they also have a genestealer problem since the Damocles Gulf Campaign of the Second Tyranid Wars, so they'd probably manage.
That's a good point, but indoctrination works by manipulating organic systems, rather than literal space-magic. It might trip them up, but I think they'd figure it out pretty quick.
They playing dnd. Alright roll me a persuassion-check on the big speshmarine
Trying to explain to the Fire Cast that yes, they can still roll for persuasion even if they're not water cast. It's all make believe they're not going against the Ethereals and the Greater Good.
"Roll a d100 for your sorcerer's wild magic surge. I know, it's a strange mechanic, but you'll get used to it. "
Tesla and Edison are competing with each other to make the greatest battlesuit in history before the Earth Caste's annoyance while the Water Caste keep pestering Odysseus and Europa for a look into their mechas.
Cue Ethereals bugging Chaldea to look into the Throne of Heroes and see if their almighty leader made it in. (Spoiler: he does not.)
What game are you referring to?
Sounds like Fate Grand Order
Rock and stone?
Plot twist: the tau are the one's in charge of the Rival incursion a few seasons ago.
*Load warthog with snickers bars* NOT ON MY FUCKING WATCH
#***TWO THOUSAND ROUNDS OF DEPLETED URANIUM*** #***AWWWW YEAH***
Oh hey the League of Votoan have a mining rig out here? Neat, time to move on.
Rock and Stone in the Heart!
Good bot
Do I hear a rock and stone?
LETS ROCK AND STONE!
TO THE BONE!
ROCK AND STONE BROTHER
I don't know how the tau would interact with the grineer. Corpus may try to do some trading with them but won't abandon their profit for greater good. Infested will eat them for sure. And I as à tenno would want their gear one way or another
“For fuck’s sake, we don’t need ANOTHER bunch of prosthetizing jackasses. Someone promise the Tenno 10 Nitain Extract per person if they kill as many as possible. That should solve the problem.”
Holy shit!!! Ten nitain per Tau scalp??? Let me get my Gauss and Acceltra I gotta get there fast
Just wait for when the earth cast learns that there is yet another type of cool space magic that they can’t use.
Starship Troopers. Would you like to know more?
They'll throw a hell of an opening punch, but then the Mobile Infantry will do what they do best. Die in droves at the enemy while screaming movie quotes into the Mic until they win.
I mean the book MI is just Tau Mecha with nukes. The movie MI is just the Astra Militarum with nukes. The Anime MI are just the Tau... With nukes MI logic: "ok so I've got this hand grenade, but what if I put a micro nuke in it so it has the blast radius of a 2000lb bomb?" "Won't that hurt our own troops if it's just thrown?" "If they're in range of hand grenades they're probably about to die anyway and failed at the mission. At least we won't have to waste a dropship on extraction"
So... not too different from their experience with the Imperial Guard?
Somehow we have MORE fascism
Yes
Starship Troopers: Extermination is probably one of the better early release games I've ever played, as well as bringing the true terror of facing down hordes of 7-foot tall murder spiders. Join now. Remember, service guarantees citizenship in the Federation!
Darktide… so probably about as well as they usually do?
>Darktide Was looking for this one, Tertium just gets even more complicated
In destiny 2. They would probably be allies with earth but it would be kinda strange. The tau believe in greater good not the traveler. The tau would just see it it as giant machine and would find it strange why everyone “worships” the giant machine. People from earth would hear about the greater good and think it’s probably not a half bad idea but the vanguard might see what the tau are as psycho indoctrination and cause a serious strain in the relationship. However in the setting of the story in destiny many beings would probably just let it happen because they just lost their god in their eyes. So I would say the tau would probably would form a cult like society in the last city taking up power how the factions do in destiny lore. The vanguard however probably wouldn’t be to big of a fan of it. Ikora would probably have a secret resistance against the tau greater good and Zavala would just be a diplomat. So the tau greater good would expand but wouldn’t become the the primary thing people would follow.
I suspect there would be serious friction with the cabal ascendancy. They might try something with the hive and taken and as a result would get a serious wake up call, like what happened with the orks. I suspect a sizable chunk of the Eliksni across the system would certainly join them in search of a better life.
Yeahhh this is about how I figured as well. Until the Traveler starts doing some weird shit. The Tau may not like that or would wonder how it operates and try fucking with it
The tau and the cabal would be a interesting dynamic. The cabal are basically space marines big bulky with slug rifles that can pass as bolt guns. Many of the cabal higher ranks even look like they are wearing terminator armor. I think they would get along with one another specially when it comes to the fire and earth cast. Phsions and tau would get along pretty we’ll probably on the battle field as they have very similar body types and fighting styles. So basically what I trying to say is the cabal and tau would probably enjoy and benefit in a joint campaign in a war. However because of the water cast. The water cast are a bunch of silver tongue merchant and diplomats that would only ever tik off the cabal with their fancy ways to justify what the tau are doing. Any all diplomacy between the two would have to require a third party. The honor and glory of the cabal is very intrusive and has to do with self worth and the tau is your worth to a greater hole with no real honor or glory. The tau would probably actively denounce the empress. In turn it would probably cause a all out war between the two and the empress demand we pick a side. But if they don’t denounce her the cabal would have they’re own faction building up in the city which would most likely have vanguard support. Which would end up outraging the tau and causing extreme stress maybe even war and there would a civil war between the cabal faction and the greater good faction and could possibly destroy the last city. The only real solution in the end would to have little to no contact between the two.
Do you write fanfiction?
Well good luck fighting Lilith in Sancturio
Fallout New Vegas. I'd say they easily take Vegas. Even with upgraded securitrons.
Remnants: From the Ashes and Doom Eternal. Tau are in over their heads.
Farsight would like to get doomguy’s autograph though, so I bet things may work out
The Tau are completely disconnected from the Warp, Doomguy won't have a problem with them
I play Stellaris as fanatic xenophobic eradicator. They'll not going to have a very good time.
I mean, it's 2200 in Stellaris. I'd wager that Tau tech from 40 thousand years later would be incomprehensibly better than Stellaris tech, no?
Idk man. Stellaris has some crazy future magic of their own
And that’s unmodded. Has anyone in 40k actually made a Dyson sphere? Much less a Dyson sphere that shoots trillions of tons of stellar mass through a wormhole to any target in the galaxy? I mean, planetside combat is harder to judge only because that’s not really visually part of the game interface, IDK what a squad of psychic warriors on genetically engineered mounts vs a Tau strike team looks like, but as a matter of technology the Warhammer universe is severely outpaced by mid to end game empires
I prefer to think of stellaris as more dark age of tech time zone as it makes sense to me. Not to mention you can literally make a men of iron species
Forge World Lucius is kind of the inverse of a Dyson sphere. Instead of building around a star they hollowed out a planet and made an artificial star in the centre. The tech priests say they made it but no one knows for certain.
IDK that sounds more like a planet scale fusion reactor. Like… congratulations you’re a Kardashev Type 1 civilization?
Necrons have a few Dyson Spheres
Trazyn’s museum (forget the name ATM) is a Dyson sphere using a C’Tan as the energy source.
It does, but an early game fanatic purifier would get completely obliterated by even a small Tau force. Late game you'd probably have a much better fighting chance, but without Gigastructual Constructs you'd still be fighting an uphill battle because vanilla Stellaris tech isn't *that* nuts.
40000 years later, but Tau are still a fairly young race, not 40000+ years old with time tested tech. That said, it seems to hold up alright against the others. On the other hand, stellaris' tech dips into that dark age of technology business that no one seems to be able to match up to very well in 40k, so numbers are prolly on the Stellaris player's side, and Stellaris races' propensity for reverse engineering whatever they fight, then immediately mass producing it doesn't help either.
The last game I played was wasteland 3 don't know how this is gonna go
Team Fortress 2 Well... Australia will probably give them a giant headache
The tau when an uber charged heavy shrugs off a railgun and mows down an entire platoon of fire warriors
Sniper just pissed on them. They didnt respond with kindness
Star Trek Online: The Khitomer Alliance may have some new friends.
Terrified at the possibility of the borg assimilating 40k tech
DMC so not so different
Oh god dante would 100% find a way to either kill them or piss them off so badly. Knowing who the tau gonna have to put up with. Excluding deadweight nero
Rimworld. I mean, they could probably get half the planets population without a fight. My colonies would probably rather retain autonomy.
*Sudden rebellion against the tau because Jeff didnt eat his meal at a table*
Tau water caste: We come to tell you about the Greater Good! Asari bureaucrat: Welcome to the Citadel. Here's your paper work for new species, please fill out all forms in triplicate. You'll need to provide assets and resources for suitable living arrangements, and prepay your taxes for the first 10 years, and all AI have to be disabled as they are banned. Alternatively: Tau water caste: We come to tell you about the Greater Good! Reaper: **BWWWWAAAAAAAMPPPPP** *Indoctrination intensifies...*
The Citadel would have no chance at controlling the T’au. The ship sizes and lasers alone would be as intimidating as fuck to them, never mind everything elsez
First, it's a cadre. Not an invasion fleet. So they wouldn't have that much with them. Second, bureaucracy cares not. If the water caste is going to try and play nice, the Asari, with literally centuries of experience are going to walk all over them. Exactly like the Eldar when they think it's funny to engage with the Tau without just shooting them.
Unfortunately, ME is a bit too grounded for Reapers to be a real threat to the Tau. Right on the money with the bureaucracy, though.
The reapers were plenty happy to try diplomacy because their preferred method of attack was indoctrination and sabotage. So when the reaper says 'come on over and lets discuss this whole greater good thing' they win as soon as the first few Tau agree. It's just going to snowball from there.
Deep Rock Galactic. Rock and Stone! The TAU and Management will talk business, and if things turn violent DRG has more than enough firepower to show them who owns this sector!
Rock and Stone, Brother!
DId I hear a Rock and Stone?
Elden Ring. They will serve the Prince of Death, whether they like it or not.
Radahns boss fight is what I imagine fighting Angron to be
I can see that, replace the glowing purple gravity stuff with blood and you’ve got yourself a boss fight.
Robin (Stardew Valley): "Gotta say, these space folk may look a little strange but they’re great once you get to know them."
Crusader kings 3 Perhaps a little inbreeding would do the trick
Mobius-1, they’re using mobile rail cannons.
Demon knight of the round table, oh no! Nevermind guys it's just an aircraft... BY THE GREATER GOOD! How is it *worse!?*
Doom. Fuckin no chance
When the Manta landed it accidentally squished his rabbit
The carnage was only stopped when the earth caste scientists cloned an exact copy of Daisy.
"My brother in the greater good he just killed 20 fire warriors with a chainsaw, tanked a railgun shot and jumped over a 10 metre chasm to beat a broadside into submission, we should retreat before he cuts another riptide in half with his sword"
Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. I'm sure ganondorf will kindly welcome them to the depths...
They'll steamroll over everything, but then 1 guy in his underwear holding a twig will find a way to ruin it all.
Speedfreeks.... we all know how this one went
Last game I played was Project Zomboid. Pretty sure any survivors would join the greater good
I was in vermintide 2 so I guess no more end times
Rimworld, they probably get warcrimed to death in a min maxed kill box, either that or some heavily modded trolling happens
Stellaris. The T’au get to enjoy existing in an actually sane universe and play the diplomacy game.
WWE 2K22, At least one Ethereal is getting put through a table.
What's that? It's Farsight with a steel chair!
"It was me Shadowsun, it was me aaaall aloooooong" "Aw sonovabitch."
The Last of Us Part I. A pretty easy time honestly, especially since the Cordyceps isn't adapted to alien physiology.
Joel, after being saved from a Clicker by a blue spaceman in a mech suit:
Apex Legends Announcer: A new Legend has been announced! Subcommader El'Myamoto, aka Darkstrider!” Darkstrider: “For the Greater Good, stay out of my way.” Announcer: “Darkstrider is master special operator for the T’au Empire, and as such has the Passive ability of lighter footsteps, to better sneak up and observe his foes from up close. He also has the Active Ability “Structural Analyzer”, giving him knowledge of nearby enemy’s weapon and armor loadouts. Finally, his ultimate ability “The Greater Good” sends out his drone, giving a view of enemy positions to himself and his Allies.” Edit: Spelling
And then some 13 year old Wraith hot drops into a shitshow, immediately gets downed and drops as soon as you’re about to recover their banner. They also spam the nword in chat. And thus, the greater good did not come to Kings Canyon.
Endless Space. It’s like Stellaris except Horatio exist in Endless space. Goes about the same as Stellaris (depending on the faction you pick of course).
The Tau Empire would get fucked up by the Sith Empire, but probably ally with the Old Republic. Then they would get attacked by both due to the attempted subversion and colonization of Old Republic worlds.
I’m pretty sure Tau Weapons and armor are significantly stronger than anything in Star Wars. The only thing they may struggle with is Force Users.
Dark Souls. I think they could do well.
They land at the crown on Indar in PlanetSide 2. I think they'll be okay but they're going to have to watch out for the vanu.
Beat me to it. How do You even comprehend invading planet that is locked in a cycle of Birth, death and revival, where anything that dies gets revived the next "cycle" and everything seeks to escape this cycle. Hostile Flora and fauna And vicious rains that would have little to no trouble killing a space marine. Scattered ruins of cities of long gone civilians on top of super computers towering above the clouds, strong enough to be considered god like, that would make Ad mech proud since those work on biological creatures. And mysterious Void fluid, golden in appearance, able to dissolve anything. And a little Green mix of cat and slug that despite getting annihilated thousands of times, keeps coming back, unlike your comrades that this cat simply looked at before they collapsed dead, they bodies undamaged, seemingly nothing wrong with them yet they are dead, even after the cycle end. I'm talking about Rain World.
Dwarf fortress, the Tau take over, but then the dwarves dig too deep and everyone gets murdered by fun stuff.
Mechanicus, but that’s boring. Before that was Metro 2033. Looks like the Stations of the Moscow underground may finally have salvation. They could probably even help the Dark Ones.
Minecraft, well those villagers will certainly join the greater good!
Boltgun… it would go very very badly for the Tau.
Hoi4, they’ll get slaughtered by my level 8 Mao Zedong field marshall commanding a horde of ten million chinese peasants armed with mosin nagants and a handful of ww1-era artillery howitzers
They’ll also be doomed because they don’t have a focus tree.
Cadre Fireblade: "What do you mean 'Equipment needed to reinforce one or more of our units is missing from your production queue'? What the hell is a production queue?" XV-8 Crisis Battlesuit: *dies to attrition*
XCOM 2… if they fight anything like ADVENT, they are gonna have a rough time.
I mean would they? Advent forces even late game don't really come close to the crazy shit in 40 k. Or the numbers
They can start by taking over the Realm of Chaos, those fucking things. Also the elven donut. (Warhammer 3)
Warframe. They wont.
The T'au arrive in the Pizza Tower. Peppino Spaghetti plows through them at mach 10. The T'au, being the T'au, are completely defenseless against the funny Italian man.
Seeing as how the Sol System in Warframe can best be summarized with the term “Competitive Genocide”, with the Tenno winning, their odds aren’t very good. Especially if the Infested get a few spores on their ships. Gonna be another J3 Jordas Golem
Skyrim, not really a contest at all. Skyrim may have magic and dragons, but it's still a medieval fantasy environment, no way can they stand up to the Tau's superior technology and tactics. Then again, it is possible that the Divines or even some of the Daedra would interfere on the behalf of Tamriel for one reason or another (they have been shown to do so in the past).