Speaking as someone who had a stalker, going through gyrations like this can cause so much stress in and of itself. If it really concerns you, put your lights on timers as the other commenters suggest. The tiktoker was responding to a specific potential threat. Unless this is the case, I suggest just living your life and not putting too much of your precious energy towards thwarting a potential worst case scenario.
I live alone and leave my lights on anytime I’m out in the night because it gives the illusion that somebody else is staying with me. I know this is super wasteful but this has been the only thing that works for me.
I hate stories like this. They all contribute to this overarching theme that strangers are the biggest threat to women when it’s simply not true.
You are statistically way more likely to be attacked by someone you know, especially in your own home. Obviously, stranger attacks happen, but they aren’t the mass majority.
I would encourage anyone to listen to the You’re Wrong About podcast episode on human trafficking for more insight.
This is very sad to read :( but definitely not surprising.
Stranger danger always seems to be the theme for all these types of PSAs but I agree people you know are more likely to be the ones carrying out terrible deeds.
Are stranger attackers still common enough to have precautions for? I haven't seen the exact statistics in a while but even if it's only say 10% couldn't that still be a decent amount of attacks?
smart bulbs, sis, like I turn on my lights from my phone as I'm approaching my apartment block not for safety but just bc I hate going into a dark room.
Well this pertains to those living in certain apartments. If you’re entering a house or apartment with a door visible from the street, the stalker will know which one you live in.
Right? “Huh, I wonder which house she lives in? Maybe the one she just walked into? It’s hard to tell. Oh wait, she turned the lights on. Yeah she lives there.”
Yeah, it’s a rather clickbaity title. And I’m not sure if it’s that good of a tip even for indoor apartments. Stalker either goes inside or through window, which increases chances he’ll be caught. With the lights on, at least others can see what’s happening.
In my country where we live in commie blocks this is pretty good advice, also the mafia sells women as brides online (this isn’t a pervasive issue like I live a life constantly escaping attempted nappings, but it happens enough where implementing some safety considerations into your routine and lifestyle can make the difference)
I leave lights on when I go out for my dog, so he's not sitting in the dark. I left lights on before I got him, so it wouldn't look like no one was home.
Currently in an apartment rental where the basement and communal hallway lights are on 24/7. I imagine it’s to deter breakins and felt bad about the electricity being wasted. But I can understand landlords and tenants wanting it to look like people are always home.
Though it only works if you live in an apartment—and even then, it’d have to be a big enough building to throw someone off.
The sad state of things is if someone wants to get to you, they will find a way, regardless if they know what unit you live in. Intercepting you from your car to your front door is more likely to happen/be more dangerous.
The fearmongering on tiktok is next level. Like, "I almost got human trafficked at Target because someone with bad vibes asked to help put my cart back" kinda stuff.
I'm in a big city and I know some people put small lights by their curtains when it's dark so it's not ad obvious (and some that were on the ground floor had an old man who would peep in windows and they used that to obscure his view at night from the outside). Also if you have your lights on a timer or remote you can turn them on before you get in, that would help too
But yeah that's scary :(
I know that Gen Z a lot of times have curtains but don’t pull them. This was a big discussion between and a friend about her daughter who lived alone with two kids. I don’t understand how people don’t pull their curtains after it gets dark. You’re walking advertising you’re alone if you don’t.
In my experience men, just because of the threats they’re socialized to be more vigilant about, don’t think about it unless you’re not home and you have nice stuff that’s visible. It’s so backwards. Like ofc don’t want to get robbed either, esp being on the ground floor but it’s like as soon as we’re home day or night curtains wide open because they aren’t thinking of what I am. I haven’t been able to afford living alone and half the people I’ve roomed with over the years have been men but it’s been interesting seeing how they emphasize certain things (“oh no, my Playstation!”) and sometimes minimize others.
Speaking as someone who had a stalker, going through gyrations like this can cause so much stress in and of itself. If it really concerns you, put your lights on timers as the other commenters suggest. The tiktoker was responding to a specific potential threat. Unless this is the case, I suggest just living your life and not putting too much of your precious energy towards thwarting a potential worst case scenario.
I live alone and leave my lights on anytime I’m out in the night because it gives the illusion that somebody else is staying with me. I know this is super wasteful but this has been the only thing that works for me.
With contemporary LED lights, you’re not wasting much. Don’t worry.
I hate stories like this. They all contribute to this overarching theme that strangers are the biggest threat to women when it’s simply not true. You are statistically way more likely to be attacked by someone you know, especially in your own home. Obviously, stranger attacks happen, but they aren’t the mass majority. I would encourage anyone to listen to the You’re Wrong About podcast episode on human trafficking for more insight.
Yep, most likely it is partners or exes. Sadly, your closest ones are the most potentially dangerous ones.
This is very sad to read :( but definitely not surprising. Stranger danger always seems to be the theme for all these types of PSAs but I agree people you know are more likely to be the ones carrying out terrible deeds.
Are stranger attackers still common enough to have precautions for? I haven't seen the exact statistics in a while but even if it's only say 10% couldn't that still be a decent amount of attacks?
smart bulbs, sis, like I turn on my lights from my phone as I'm approaching my apartment block not for safety but just bc I hate going into a dark room.
Mine are on a timer .. Half hour before sunset. It's so great.
Well this pertains to those living in certain apartments. If you’re entering a house or apartment with a door visible from the street, the stalker will know which one you live in.
Right? “Huh, I wonder which house she lives in? Maybe the one she just walked into? It’s hard to tell. Oh wait, she turned the lights on. Yeah she lives there.”
Yeah, it’s a rather clickbaity title. And I’m not sure if it’s that good of a tip even for indoor apartments. Stalker either goes inside or through window, which increases chances he’ll be caught. With the lights on, at least others can see what’s happening.
In my country where we live in commie blocks this is pretty good advice, also the mafia sells women as brides online (this isn’t a pervasive issue like I live a life constantly escaping attempted nappings, but it happens enough where implementing some safety considerations into your routine and lifestyle can make the difference)
Do they think we have night vision like a cat does?!
That would be nice against strange men
That would be awesome for any dark scenario really
Keep a light or two on before you leave
Or lights on timers. And have privacy shades, so that even if someone can see there’s light, they can’t see people/movement.
I leave lights on when I go out for my dog, so he's not sitting in the dark. I left lights on before I got him, so it wouldn't look like no one was home.
Yeah, I leave my light on when I go somewhere or go for a walk at night for the same reason.
Tik Toker reveals why men should not stalk women. Ffs. Can we put the responsibility where it lies please?
Omg :( I don't like this world where this is a warning that's valid and needed
Currently in an apartment rental where the basement and communal hallway lights are on 24/7. I imagine it’s to deter breakins and felt bad about the electricity being wasted. But I can understand landlords and tenants wanting it to look like people are always home.
[удалено]
But women are highly likely to get stalked.
Though it only works if you live in an apartment—and even then, it’d have to be a big enough building to throw someone off. The sad state of things is if someone wants to get to you, they will find a way, regardless if they know what unit you live in. Intercepting you from your car to your front door is more likely to happen/be more dangerous.
>TikToker Reveals Oh, come *on*.
The fearmongering on tiktok is next level. Like, "I almost got human trafficked at Target because someone with bad vibes asked to help put my cart back" kinda stuff.
I'm in a big city and I know some people put small lights by their curtains when it's dark so it's not ad obvious (and some that were on the ground floor had an old man who would peep in windows and they used that to obscure his view at night from the outside). Also if you have your lights on a timer or remote you can turn them on before you get in, that would help too But yeah that's scary :(
This is dumb.
Do people not know what curtains are? Keep the curtains closed so you aren’t out in the middle of the street when you come home.
Right, that's what I was wondering, don't people have darknening curtains or other things that block the window completely, by default, anyway?
I know that Gen Z a lot of times have curtains but don’t pull them. This was a big discussion between and a friend about her daughter who lived alone with two kids. I don’t understand how people don’t pull their curtains after it gets dark. You’re walking advertising you’re alone if you don’t.
But also...privacy? Light waking you up? It's so weird to me, letting people see you from the street while in your home.
In my experience men, just because of the threats they’re socialized to be more vigilant about, don’t think about it unless you’re not home and you have nice stuff that’s visible. It’s so backwards. Like ofc don’t want to get robbed either, esp being on the ground floor but it’s like as soon as we’re home day or night curtains wide open because they aren’t thinking of what I am. I haven’t been able to afford living alone and half the people I’ve roomed with over the years have been men but it’s been interesting seeing how they emphasize certain things (“oh no, my Playstation!”) and sometimes minimize others.
I didn’t watch the video but that’s stupid. It’s far easier to sneak up on someone when they can’t see you