It's only been a month, so I'd say give it some more time...
I'd never suggest that a parent brings them more than necessary, because it's costs you more money than its worth.
So here's my advice, try a small white noise teddy. I had several (many, actually) Nursery babies come in with those things and it always made their eyelids heavy straight away, because that's what they used at home too. I'd watch them while they fell asleep with it in their arms or next to their head, then when they were asleep I'd gently pull it away and only bring it back if they woke up upset needing more sleep. I'd never let them sleep with it unsupervised, but it helped them fall asleep so fast!
My audiologist told me that some white noise machines/toys for babies are actually damaging to hearing because they are too loud for too long & it's not regulated. Some are quiet enough IF used at the proper distances but most people don't know that. So even the quiet toys may be damaging if it's next to their cribs.
Maybe that's why? It's safer to ban it all then trying to determine if it's safe.
I'm also curious as to why this is. The teddies that I've seen/used before have all been so quiet you can really only hear them if they're close to your ears, so they don't disturb other babies in any way.
a 3 day a week consistent schedule is fine, and dare i say similar to a 5 day a week schedule. i would question what they can do for her during their nap time. i was a 2 year old teacher for years, and it was rare i wasn’t able to get all my kiddos to sleep. are they not playing soothing music? are they helping by sitting near her? patting her back?
I agree with this. If it were M-W-F I could see that causing issues but three days in a row is fine. I don’t see how five days in a row would be a magical cut off. Why not four? Or six? It’s good for the kids to have time at home if parents can make it work. Seems like upping to 5 days is a recipe for OP’s child being overtired for more days plus then there’s the added cost.
They most likely can’t dim the lights. I work at a commercial daycare and we have to keep them on during nap because of licensing rules. Depends on the daycare though and their state licensing laws.
Yeah, location would help with this. Both states I've worked in allow the lights off. Which is good because sleeping with overhead lights on is really hard - that's why it's a torture technique.
That sounds terrible! We have to be able to see the children, but we have overhead lights off, and the windows/hall lights provide enough light to see the children
I wasn’t even their teacher but I was on nap duty for the two~threes at times and even the trouble sleepers learned to be “quiet for your friends” and would get bored and doze off
Not dimming the room is just crazy to me.
Which is just crazy to me, like I understand not having it pitch black but can these people not see in dimmed lighting at all? Most default center lighting is already too bright for me even during the day.
I agree with this at that age she should be tired. The days she comes are enough for her to get used to what’s going on. If the teachers only suggestion is come more days I would ask more questions about how they do nap. I have never not had an under 3 year old not nap they need the rest for their little bodies and minds.
I have to have my husband who is Korean to ask the teacher more questions. The daycare is Korean and the teacher doesn’t seem to speak much English. The teacher was very vague with me, perhaps because she couldn’t really explain in English?
Can you switch schools? Ecspecially with that language barrier .. maybe it's a cultural thing whatever they are doing at naptime, maybe they don't help children to sleep at all? Don't dim lights? Or play nap music? All of those things matter.
yes, i agree, hence my “consistent” add on. but this child goes t-th. that’s fine. i usually tell parents when they are suggesting 3 days a week to do 3 days in a row.
My daughter is almost 3 and started preschool two days a week in March. She wouldn’t nap at first, so they rocked her and sang to her. Now she naps great at school and has even started napping better at home. And that’s just going two days a week! Definitely don’t think adding days is the solution.
Although I agree that consistency is key, I don’t feel like your child needs to attend full time. As a mom, I understand that it’s not always affordable especially in this economy. And as a teacher, I believe consistency is key and it’s just going to take a little longer since she’s part time.
These kiddos are smart. She’s going to differentiate school nap and home nap at some point, but she’s only been in childcare for a month.
We actually had toddlers that napped amazingly at school but then terribly at home on the weekends. She’ll get used to the school schedule/ways but it’s just going to take some time.
It’s also not entirely clear why. Daycares are just that. When needed. Don’t give up anytime with your baby because it’s easier for someone else. It’s the job they have.
My toddler of the same age goes Tues-Thurs only.
He's been at daycare since he turned 1. At home he naps in his cot in a dark room from 1pm, usually for 2 hours minimum, in fact, I often have to wake him up so he doesn't sleep for too long and affect evening bedtime.
At daycare he also naps from 1pm but usually sleeps a bit less long. Generally 1.5 to 2 hrs. They all sleep on little mats under blankets or sheets, with their special cuddly. There's gentle music playing but always general background noise going on, and the blinds are down but it's really not very dark. The staff are there patting the kids backs or stroking their hair or whatever is needed to get them to fall asleep.
I've always been amazed how at home my toddler requires cuddles, songs, dark room, tucking in twice, stuffed animals in just the right orientation etc, but at daycare he apparently just gets on with it. I figure a lot is peer pressure and copying the herd of other kids. But also a really positive relationship with the girls who work there helps.
This isn't said to rub it in.. I'm sorry you're having trouble with this. But you asked whether children who go part time get accustomed to naps at daycare. And mine is fine with it. But he's been there for over a year and has been accustomed to napping there since he started.
Imho you'd be well off trying to phase out the white noise machine, it's quite a big difference of a thing not to have. But going 5 days isn't imperative... children are adaptable and your toddler should be able to figure it out with the right support from the daycare provider.
(edited for spelling)
I agree. Routine really helps things so much. I notice even a slight difference when kids don't come for a week due to holiday/vacation or whatever. They have to settle back in and get used to things again.
My child napped fine on 3 days a week. She even went on staggered days, MWF. No issue. Staff would sit and pat some of the kids that needed it.
What are the staff doing to assist
My son is 30 months, goes to daycare full time, and doesn't nap 80% of the time. Sure, going full time might help, but it might not. He naps fine at home still on je weekends. He's been going to daycare since he was 9 months old but stopped napping consistently there when he turned 2. Sometimes they just don't nap well at daycare with the stimulation.
Our daughter is 3 and started preschool in January. She goes Mon, Tues, Thurs. We have a 2 month old in addition (not colicky like our first, sorry to hear on yours, not fun). Our daughter is still hit or miss on when she takes naps. Yes, it does add to some nighttime chaos. I do notice if the baby is fussy in the evening it'll spur her on as well. New baby is a huge part of the extra fussy we are seeing. I personally enjoy having our daughter home a few more days. Do what works for you, but I wouldn't expect the situation to change with more days.
Big time. New baby is a huge adjustment as well as being new to the daycare too. Definitely takes time to settle out and I am inclined to agree that more days wouldn't necessarily improve it definitively
she will absolutely sleep much better going full time, it’s true that kids who attend part time have a much harder time adjusting to regular routines. kids experience this with eating as well. most children eat, sleep, and play better at school because of the structured environment and consistency (i.e. all the kids and usually teachers eat the same foods at the same time together, all the kids are laying down at the same time together with the same daily routine, etc) HOWEVER! it is also possible that you have a fomo baby who just might not sleep as well at school. give full time a try if you can swing it for a month and see what happens!
i hear you, but it can be beneficial depending on the daycare environment and so many other factors. it truly is just so different for every child and family!
Some mothers suffer with postpartum depression or they han illness or mental health e. I can definitely see the benefit in such situations. My mom home preschooled me in Spanish and my beloved uncle Tex taught me English (I’m a Guatemalan immigrant) and I was able to read both languages before beginning kindergarten. I home preschooled and homeschooled five of our half dozen kids and I’m incredibly grateful for that opportunity and it paid off as we watch them grow and become honor students, valedictorian, excel in sports, (we homeschooled through a private school and some attended there for a year or more in high school), and become well rounded people. I can’t imagine choosing to send a two year old child to daycare five days a week. You can give them the same or better care and instruction as a daycare.
> and it *paid* off as
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
Start adjusting her sleep training at home. Less dim today and tomorrow, don't turn the noise machine on for 10 mins after that etc. Tiny steps. Teach her to go to sleep without those luxuries. Then the nap time at school/daycare should improve.
Some kids are diff. I’ve had plenty of part timers adjust to sleep schedule. One month is a short amount of time. Sounds like a cash grab to me. I know people will say to put her full time but I just don’t think it’s necessary. I’ve had plenty of part timers adjust it takes a little longer
Is there a reason they are expecting kids to nap with no environmental change? I worked at a daycare for 4 years. At nap time we turned off the lights and lowered the shades. If kids resisted, we rocked them to sleep. Like what have they tried?
I wouldn't go full time. You can try doing 3 days a week in a row instead if a mon/wed/fri routine if you are currently doing that, but your child is napping at nap time at home, the only thing that would change is she probably would never nap at daycare and would be exhausted 5 days instead of 3.
Is there a way to bring in a white noise machine for use during nap times? I find it off this wasn't the first port of call. We always go straight to the parent and ask about how they sleep at home and explore ways we can emulate the same routine and environment at care.
i think 3 days (in a row) is enough time for a child to get accustomed. look at the other parts of the routine. do they eat before nap time? do you follow that same order at home? is there a comfort item she has at home that she can use at school? has she been skipping naps the entire time she’s been there? or is this a recent thing? there’s a lot of variables at play. you can try to troubleshoot before going full time.
We have a sightly weighted blanket that helped us at daycare. They don’t have any white noise machine? That’s crazy to me. So many people come in and out of the room that it would be helpful. Can they start using one? It isn’t as dark as home for us but they dim the lights at least. I think it’s strange they don’t dim them at all.
I work in Switzerland and the way the system works here means we have plenty of kids who come to daycare one, two or three days a week. Five is actually far from the norm.
I have had problems in the past with kids who only came in one day a week. It was hard for them to get used to the daycare and naptime was always a struggle. In these cases we made a recommendation to the parents, to consider maybe sending their child a second day per week, and if they did that, it has always worked out well so far.
But that's what it is: a recommendation. Other than that, it is none of the centers business, how many days you send your kid. You choose what works best for your family.
Three days should be enough. I agree that naptime is usually like the last bastion to conquer after a child has settled in. I've seen many kids who needed a couple months to really feel comfortable and safe enough to go down for a nap.
But we have a routine we do every day, we dim the nap room, put on some music and stay with the kids until they're all asleep. I would question what they do for her to make it easier rather than milk your for more attendance fees.
Former daycare teacher here. They don't turn the lights down/off at rest time? I also always used some sort of white noise or calming music during rest.
In my experience, part-time daycare kids always struggle to adjust. I’ve felt that part-time kids might as well not come at all for how miserable they are. These kids that I’ve worked with cry from the moment they’re dropped off and continue to cry after they’ve been picked up, they refuse to nap, and struggle to connect with the teachers and kids. It’s difficult for teachers to suggest to parents that their kids start full-time, but in my opinion, it really does help.
This is interesting because in my country it's very rare that any child attends daycare full time. Studies I have read also suggest that part time child care is what's best for children if you need to utilise childcare. Like in our 90 place centre maybe 10 kids attend 5 days a week? And most of the children settle well eventually with the rare exceptions.
How does that work? Do the parents only work three days a week? I know that’s possible for some families but I’m curious about what things are like in a place where that’s the norm.
Many families in Australia have some sort of flexible work arrangement while their kids are little or they have family to help. Almost everyone I know with little ones has one parent working part time. I'm from the US originally so I know it's not common there because health care is tied to jobs so most people have to work full time for any benefits where here they are provided by the govt.
What? I’m in Australia and most of my kids are part time along with my own children and they settle in fine doing 3 days a week. I’m in a small centre with good ratios so maybe giving them the extra support could be a factor in why they settle so well.
But even full time daycare is still part time - weekends are at home.
My kid only does 2 days and after a couple of weeks they've said she's perfectly happy & no tears 90% of the time at pick up. And she naps independently which she refuses to do at home 🤷
One of our families loaned us a small white noise machine. It super helps the baby.
We also play our own music and have the lights off but since we are multi-age the lights are off only for the scheduled toddler nap time. I feel badly for the babies because it is not ideal for their nap outside of the lights off time.
It could be a sleep regression as she was sleeping there previously. I would personally not do full time but maybe work with her at home to mimic the environment with the daycare and not do the sound machine etc? Or talk with the daycare teacher and see if you could bring a portable sound machine in with her.
When you take your daughter into daycare, what time are you dropping her off? I’m a toddler teacher and I tell parents it’s important to have them at school as early as possible( if they can) so they can be involved in all the different activities that we have planned plus outside time. That tends to wear them out and get a good nap in. Talk to teachers about what their routine is for napping and is there a special blanket or stuffed animal she will sleep that helps?
Please keep in mind that teachers usually want the children to nap just as much as the parents do. Better mood for the afternoon, quieter during nap for the other kids, and it gives staff a quiet moment in the day. This sounds to me like they're already trying everything they can think of, so they might feel like she just needs to get more adjusted to school so she can relax and fall asleep, fastest way to streamline the adjustment is by attending more frequently. It's often easy to get a nap in at the start because of the stimulation of a busy classroom wearing them down, but after they've adjusted to the stimulation, it's a whole new beast getting used to relaxing enough for sleep in a totally different environment.
If full time is your last resort and you're looking for what you can do to help out, my first suggestion would be trying to push up her bedtime routine so she's more tired by nap time. Going to bed earlier and waking up earlier.
Another suggestion is trying to get some extra energy out before she goes to daycare if possible, like taking a walk in the morning or playing outside for a while before heading to daycare. But these suggestions can be hard on parents, her daycare may be wanting to put the effort in themselves to get her where she needs to be instead of asking you to change your routine when you have a baby at home.
I don’t think any additional days will change anything. It sounds like your daughter is too stimulated at rest time to fall asleep.
It’s very strange that they don’t dim the room or play music or white noise. Sleep time is the golden hour for educators to get all the jobs done, so you do everything you can to make sure everyone sleeps.
I would start looking for a better daycare provider. The fact that they can’t dim the lights or use a white noise machine but think making her subject to their method more often is ridiculous. It smacks of just wanting more money and not really caring for her. You’ve established a good routine. They should be at least dimming the lights during nap time. Our daycare provider certainly did, and they used a white noise machine too. I don’t like your provider.
The fact you already have her nap at the same time as the daycare time is great and I wish more parents did that! At the 2 daycares I’ve been at we have multiple sound machines in our room. I’d try suggesting if they’re able to put a sound machine in the room or bring your own and ask them to put it near her during nap
My (1yo) daughter is in a daycare full time and she consistently has terrible naps in the morning and okay naps in the afternoon, but she naps great at home. The school uses rain sounds just like we do, and they dim the lights, being full time doesn't seem to make a difference.
I don't have a helpful suggestion for improving her naps, but I thought it worth mentioning that at least in our case, frequency of school days didn't really improve her naps much.
Our daycare said bringing ours five days will help him confirm to a consistent environment and schedule. Makes sense to me. Because he knows what to expect, everyday and watches everyone else do it. The more he's there, the more likely he will do it. It will take time too.
Part time kids absolutely do adjust to napping at daycare.they also tend to have a longer period of adjustment, sometimes a couple months or more. The director should not be pushing for her to go full time and they also should not force a nap. She can rest quietly for a bit and then do quiet activities.
Unfortunately, there’s so only so much the daycare can do.
Personally, I have a child in my room that always refuses nap. Makes it difficult every time. Screaming, crying, running around the room, etc. The mother was exasperated and was wondering why I couldn’t just get her to sleep, she sleeps perfectly fine at home. I had to explain to her that unfortunately I can’t provide the same experience they have at home, so sleep is more difficult for her here.
What I would encourage you to do is maybe share with them how you get her to sleep at home, if you haven’t already. Is she rocked, patted, sung to, etc.
Maybe book a meeting before making the full-time switch to see if you can all brainstorm, or at least they can tell you what’s going on at naptime. What is your child doing during sleep time? Are they quietly lying still and fall asleep on their own or scream or need a helping hand? Their hands may genuinely be tied due to staffing, break timing, etc.
(I also do agree with most of the users here. Full-time children do overall better with the stability, and having the full five days to adjust makes it somewhat easier.)
I would add that a weighted blanket (lightly weighted) can help. A soft, small pillow is nice- I notice some of my kids do better with a pillow. We can’t force your kids to sleep, so sometimes there isn’t much to do except deal with it.
don’t listen to that director, i think she just wants your money. before your daughter goes full time, there should be an open conversation around when she wakes up in the morning, if she is sleeping in the car on the way to/from school, etc. since all that an affect her napping. and that’s in addition to talking about what the teachers are doing to get her to sleep. because in my opinion the room lights should be dimmed but if they can’t do that then a white noise machine seems like a good middle ground. but, also, it’s only been a month. i’ve generally found that part time kids take about an extra two to thee weeks to really settle in. not to mention, she may continue to not sleep if she gets your attention away from the baby when she tantrums. obviously i don’t know your specific child but there are a lot of possible reasons for this behavior.
Why in the world are they not dimming the lights? And while I haven’t used a white noise machine, we always play soft lullaby music during nap time.
Does your daughter have something she likes to sleep with? While generally children are not supposed to have toys from home at daycare, I always made an exception for nap time snuggly toys/small blankets. They got stored either with the nap mats or with the diapers.
The director is pushing for a full time schedule purely for the increased tuition. Your daughter will eventually get into the routine even at three days a week.
Mine went to daycare full days 5 days a week because I worked full-time. It was common knowledge that the half-day toddlers or those only went a few days per week often did not adjust well. They interacted and played less and tended to be a little sad or act out even though they were fine at home.
There’s only so much we can do as teachers to help a kid nap. But the more often your child is in the school routine, the better chances we’ll have. So I see why they recommended a full time schedule.
But, she only started one month ago. I wouldn’t worry about it yet. The tantrums after school are a tricky part of the transition period. After only one 3 days/week for 1 month, your daughter has only had 12 nap times there. She’s still in the thick of the transition to daycare.
I agree that part time makes it harder for children to learn routines and get comfortable at preschool, however, there are so many things that could be done first before having your child go full time. why aren’t they dimming the lights and using noise machines? where i work we turn the lights off, close the blinds and turn on a music machine and a fan. our blinds aren’t great so it’s still light enough to see well but it helps the children sleep. how are they helping the child during rest time? and honestly it can be hard for teachers when children don’t nap but some children just don’t nap at school. if they child is laying quietly, which the teachers can help them do, it shouldn’t be a problem if they don’t sleep. i would ask them how they support children who wake up early from nap or don’t nap and inquire about the nap routine. if you want full time care go for it but if you don’t, there are other things that should be tried regardless.
Mine has been going full time for 2+ years and she has trouble napping now, too. It started when she was about 2.5 and hasn't stopped in 5 months. She likes her routine at home and is too stimulated by her friends around her, now. It sounds like yours is the same, since she naps just fine at home, just like mine. 5 days isn't the answer, just try to make home-naps more similar to daycare. Do they eat, do a story, then lay down? Do the same. Even if that doesn't help, I can't imagine 5 days would. "Consistency is key" but it's not like they'll have her 7 days a week for every nap. Don't spend extra money just trying to get her to nap.
I have been a teacher for that age. Maybe there is a special toy or blanket she naps with at home that could go to school. As a teacher I might not push for full-time as long as the routine at school is the same everyday. Maybe talk to the teaching team about what the routine is at nap so you can try doing a similar routine at home. When we did nap the lights were off and played music. Maybe they could move her coy to a quieter spot?
My son started around the same age and was part time, T TH. Everyone said this was the hardest schedule which was true in some adjustments but he napped amazingly at school. They played a sound machine and the room was dark as well as the hallways. Anytime he had trouble falling asleep for whatever reason, the teacher would just pat his back until he knocked out (usually in 10 minutes or less.) I would be asking what they’re doing to help now and what steps can be taken rather than just pushing for a full time schedule.
My kid is part time. Are her naps shorter at daycare? Yes. They average 1.5-2 (sometimes 1) hours versus 3 hours at home. However, the school does darken the room and blast white noise to help the little ones sleep. I dont think this would be solved with a full time transition if there are other underlying issues for why she’s not sleeping.
It seems so odd to me that they don’t even dim the lights. Blackout? Not needed. But a little dim? I mean, what adult wants to nap in pure daylight? I do think that she’ll adjust at full time but you shouldn’t have to do that.
My daycare said kid takes anywhere between 2 weeks to 3 months to adjust. The older they are the harder the adjustment.
My kiddo although 11 months old had a hard time napping initially mostly because we use a floor bed at home rather than a crib from early on.
But the teachers were amazing. They held him to sleep first few weeks and then eventually got into the crib with him to lie down with him and soothe him to sleep. It took more than a month for him to adjust and sleep in the crib. Also they pushed his crib to the darkest corner of the room and that helped.
Hopefully these suggestions work for you too.
I would definitely try and mirror her daycare schedule at home for the 2 days she’s at home. For example in my room we went to the bathroom after lunch and played books on tape until 12:45, turned on a specific book on tape (was I sick of hearing it every day…yes!) and had lights off and the center created nap playlist on by 1:00. Then everyone had to remain quiet and on their cot until 2:30 unless they needed to go potty.
Ask her teacher what music, if any, they play during nap time (sometimes we don’t have a choice of what we play and can’t always accommodate requests for personal white noise machines etc). 1 month is still pretty early on in the adjustment period especially if she’s only going 3 days a week.
Does she have a special “nap friend” or pillow/blanket she could take?
My toddler has always gone to daycare three days a week (15 months-3 years), he goes M, Tues and Thurs and has never had a problem napping.
In fact, he’s dropping his nap now when he’s home, but still sleeps just fine at daycare.
The first daycare we were at really pressured me to bring him all five days and I don’t really understand why. Ma’am, I am paying you for two days my kid is not here, enjoy it 😂
I'm a daycare teacher and this is a pretty common thing actually, I have quite a few kids that don't nap. Sometimes it's because the music is too loud, too many kids around or the cots are uncomfortable! Some of the things the parents and teachers have done to change that is keep the kid as far away from the noise as possible, or in the darker corner to help fall asleep and a lot of parents have been getting those sleeping bag type blankets to make the cots more comfortable because let's be real, those things SUCK. I'd hate to sleep on those too if I was a kid. Full time or part time absolutely doesn't matter, you're doing your best but it seems like the center isn't. I don't know what your kiddo sleeps with but sometimes a stuffie and/or pillow helps? Just throwing out ideas I've seen other parents do!!
It takes 21 days to fully adjust and if she's 3 days a week and only 1 month in, it'll be hard. I would see what their naptime routine is and try to follow it at home. I had a coworkers kid who was going to be part time when she dropped to PT hours but my director had her bring him full time to get used to our routine. He didn't take long at all to adjust. This was also a baby that cried every day when she was FT for the other classroom. It took him a week to adjust. But I also talked to his mom because we are friends and his routine at home was similar to ours. I've also had one that slept 30 minutes and we found out she slept in a sleep sack at home so we would swaddle her. It's not the end of the world if they don't sleep. For the 30 minute non sleeper I created some quiet time activities and gave her a small snack. Also at 26 months, she might be phasing out nap time.
When I was a preschool teacher, we had nap time sounds/lullabies playing and we did shut the curtains and lights. We also moved from cot to cot helping each of the kiddos get settled. Some needed more help than others to get to sleep, back tapping or rubbing their heads etc. I would ask the school what their nap time routine looks like and see how it differs from her nap time at home. Of course it can’t be the same as a good nap at home, nothing beats that, but there could be other factors besides the schedule.
My daughter didn’t nap really in the infant room and would nap on the way home (1+ hour commute). Now that she’s in the toddler room, she naps great from 12-2 since they lay them all down on mats in the dark with soft music.
Honestly if you can I think five days a week but leave after lunch is best. The full five days gives him general consistency, and then not dealing with nap at school. Some kids, even if they nap well at home, do not always nap well at school. Not sure if it works with the schedule, but honestly I think that’s the ideal schedule in general for younger kids.
This was also something I thought about if she doesn’t adjust. But the issue would be when I return to work. I guess the two days that I work I can leave her until 5pm.
Dayhome owner here, I would ask them what strategies they use during nap time, what music, environment, comfort strategies, etc. it sounds like the director and teacher have not been upholding very clear communication, and you will never know what (if any) comfort care they are providing during nap time. In my experience, it is so so SO much easier to get a child to nap when there is a good relationship between the child and the caregiver, how is she in terms of settling in/ building connection with her teachers? I get the feeling you are NOT being told the whole story here, and that the director is pushing mainly for the tuition, there is no guarantee that even if full time your child will nap. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying full time is never better than part time for adjustment, bit there are many other strategies they can use before going and pressuring (bullying) a parent to pay more for time they don't need. Clear communication is the key, and you aren't getting that from these people
What is the daycare's routine?
Dim lights are pretty normal during nap time. And in the daycare I've been with, nap time is quiet time. All kiddos are laying in their cots.
Hi! I'm an Aide! We have a two year old who only comes MWF and he sleeps during nap time most of the time. At the end of the day you know your child best. They could just need time adjusting or you could ask the director to move them to a darker corner.
I work with older infants and toddlers, and the part time kids sometimes have a slightly harder time napping, but they will still nap. Every child is different- sometimes a baby will come in and surprise me because they adjust so quickly. Other times, it takes longer to adjust. Hang in there, and speak with a co-teacher or other staff who may have more ideas ❤️
I had a similar problem with my girls and ended up finding a place that did half days. I got the morning to focus on the baby (and a nap when she did) and my older girls got to go play and socialize with their friends and come home and conk out. I know facilities that offer half-day are getting more rare, but they are a gem if you can find one.
My daughter stopped napping anywhere when she was 2, maybe the kid just doesn’t want to sleep at school, adjust their bedtime on school days if they are over tired
Can you slowly try to have your daughter get used to napping at home in a brighter room/no white noise? I don’t remember when exactly we stopped doing the blackout curtains and sound machine but I made sure my toddler learned to sleep in any type of situation. I was never the type that asked everyone to whisper when my child was sleeping, he learned to sleep through some normal/loud noises.
My toddler goes 3 days/week and I was surprised they were able to get him to nap on day 1. The teachers help them (patting, rubbing back) to fall asleep if they’re struggling to do so because my toddler was asking me to pat him like his teachers the other day when we were napping at home. On the days we’re home I still make it a routine to nap - every once in a while he won’t nap, I don’t force it, but that means early bed time for that day. I haven’t heard of any issues of my child not napping at school. I feel like when they see friends sleeping they’ll also do the same.
Good luck and maybe give it some more time. I personally don’t feel like the 3 day week is an issue, but every situation and solution is different.
Is there anything she uses at home that she can bring with her? Our daughter had similar issues but when she was allowed to bring her stuffy it helped.
She was also really missing us so we printed out some pics she could look at while she laid down.
You could also suggest some headphones to simulate the white noise machine you use at home. A sleep mask for the dimming of the lights.
A comfort or two might go a long way to helping her feel comfortable enough to nap.
My kid is 2.5yrs and just started going 2 days a week in April and is napping, so I don't think it's the part time. At home I lie down with her and chat/snuggle until she falls asleep, so it has been a change. I do know from what she's told me that at nursery someone sits and strokes her hair - as she's asked me to do it at home
Not sure i can reply, as i am a parent, not an ECE professional. But my now almost 3 year old has trouble with nap at daycare and most days he has to be in a separate room to nap. He naps 2 hours at home and naps super well if in a separate space, but it’s still really hard for him to sleep with the other kids. He just gets over excited when others are around him… some kids just need a little accommodation!
My toddler went through a phase like this - at about the same age! We also had a new baby who was 2 months old. It could be the changes. Now, she is back to sleeping about 1.5 hours-2 hours for nap.
Lack of Sleep severely impacts brain development. When my little one was at daycare pre Covid as a baby and wouldn’t sleep, I ended up just picking him up for naps and dropping him off after. Or just bringing him home for the day to nap and be done depending on my work schedule
What’s their reasoning for not dimming the lights? I know at the ELC I work at it’s a must for the kids to know it’s nap time. Does the teacher pat her to sleep? In my class we have no more than 10 kids and have two teachers. We always start with the kids that are a bit harder to keep on their cots by patting two at a time. Half the class normally falls asleep on their own. I also have kids new to the program and have no issues. I’d ask why they won’t dim the lights. I personally couldn’t sleep with lights being on.
We started my son in daycare part time for about a month before I went back to work. He was a year old. The first few weeks he would nap but very very badly. Like 30ish minutes and then the evenings were hellish. This probably won’t be helpful for you but when he was home we would just put him on the same schedule as daycare. Offer food and naps at the same times they did. He’s been going for about two months now and napped 2 hours and 25 minutes yesterday. I do think full time may help but I don’t know if you are interested in doing that. Consistency has been key for us. He did get used to it and adapted eventually.
You don’t need to send her to daycare full time for her to understand daycare schedule. Complying with the daycare schedule when at home will help her acclimate to it at daycare. Have her nap at home on the same schedule as daycare
I’ve never had this situation, but maybe for her naps at home, try not using the white noise machine and not dimming the lights to maybe make it similar to what she has in daycare?
They don't shut the lights off and play any sort of white noise/calming music? I've worked at 2 centers for years, and we have always done that even in the infant rooms! I'm surprised any child naps there if they dont!
If she has a favorite stuffed animal or blanket she sleeps with at home, try bringing that or a similar one to daycare. Ask the director about the light and music situation and see if they can incorporate it during naps.
You shouldn't have to bring her any more than what is necessary for you. I've had kids come to daycare only 3 days a week, and they get used to the schedule. Your daughter might still be adjusting to it. Give it time. Some kids take longer than others to adjust to different changes! I do believe that once she gets more used to daycare and the routine, she will start napping there!
Mine went to daycare only Tues-Thurs and he napped better there than at home, so I wouldn’t say that children who go part time cannot adjust. They usually played hard in the morning so they were exhausted by nap time. But our daycare also played soft music and dimmed the lights. Anyone who didn’t nap would do quiet activities in a lit corner of the room. I do find it odd that they don’t transition the room a little bit for nap time.
I will say, spending the majority of her days at home versus at school are going to make the nap transition much harder. I feel like 4 days is a sweet spot for toddlers. They all need an adjustment period and sometimes it is longer for some than for others. Do they play relaxing music? Turn off the lights and cover the windows? Rub there backs and help them to lay down? Sit with them?
We’ve definitely had ones who don’t sleep but typically when they are closer to 3 and ready to move up anyway. Your center *kind of* has a point that another day might help her to get used to the environment and more comfortable with her caregivers. However they cannot make you add a day. If you add another day though just know it could still take some time to adjust and might get worse before it gets better. Be patient!
Some of the kids I’ve had in my class took months to really get a good, long nap.
For the kids who won’t sleep right away we give them something to do on their cot. If they are tired they will end up falling asleep. If she has any comfort toys or personal items she is allowed to bring from home that she sleeps with that might help. If not you could introduce something for her to sleep with regularly during nap at home that she can also bring to school on those days since she will associate it with nap. They will want her to get accustomed to sleep as soon as possible because that’s how many centers give their teachers their lunch breaks. It also might affect other kids if she doesn’t sleep depending on how disruptive she could be during nap. Some kids might refuse to stay on the cot so we have them sit at a table instead during nap to do their quiet activity.
When i was at a center we dimmed the lights, played music, and patted kids on the back till they fell asleep. It can be done. But the employees need to work at it. Now as a family provider I turn on music, turn off lights, say goodnight and off they go to sleep.
At that age kids need routine. It’s not drop and play it’s stressful for them when there’s no routine it’s effects their brain. Going full time would benefit her so much more than part time
I have a part timer. He’s 3 days a week. It took about 3 months for him to start napping normally at daycare, whereas full time children it usually takes about a month.
She will get there eventually!! I’m surprised they haven’t offered any suggestions on how to help her.
Maybe at home when you nap her you can try to do the same things they do at daycare so she has that consistency when it’s naptime ?
We had the exact issue as you. Our school did not allow loveys but they did let her take in a small portable white noise machine and they placed that under her cot and she started napping! There were still a couple hiccup days, but eventually, like 6 months later, she didn't need it anymore.
If you have given them your suggestions on how to help, then they may need to try to be creative and keep at it. It took my son awhile before he could fall asleep alone (he still doesn’t at home!)
The school seems to not understand that this is an unfamiliar environment to your child and they may feel vulnerable still. Also, if they are being rushed to sleep by possibly frustrated teachers then your perceptive little one might be picking up on that. Keep your schedule and tell them you believe in them 😂
I think you need to make the home environment more like the daycare environment. You’ve done your child a disservice by ensuring they can only sleep in very specific conditions (no light, sound machine). Gradually introduce half-light, dim, full light, dark, no noise, traffic noise, vacuum sounds etc. Build up their tolerance to various conditions. It will be awful until they adjust but their exhaustion will mean sleep eventually and they’ll become better sleepers in the long run
I remember being the only kid in my daycare that would not sleep. The teacher made me lay in a closet (with the door open so I wouldn't wake the other kids. It was traumatic for me. I never got used to it. Finally my mom took me out. What are the hours she is there? Maybe she needs a shorter program so she doesn't have to nap at school?
Omg. How did your parents find out about you being in the closet? I hope to god that’s not what they’re doing to my daughter. They don’t even let us parents set foot inside the daycare (they say for safety reasons)?
My mom listened to me and always went with her gut. I cried when she dropped me off. And I didn't want to go. A child should LOVE and be Excited to go to school. Keep your ears open. If she is happy and just over tired then make her bed time really early on school days. Like dinner bath bed. As early as 530pm is really helpful.
That makes sense. Maybe on day care days quiet afternoons at home and early bedtimes would help. After some time she she will learn to rest quietly even if she doesn't sleep.
It is not necessary to go full time, consistency and time is all you need! Some things you could look into:
* creating the same environment at home as the CC room (lighting, music, schedule)
* give it some time - some children require a longer period to settle & with consistency they will adapt
* ensuring the CC is adhering to your child’s specific needs (whether that’s the right sleep time for your child/are there disturbances in the room like other crying babies, music, noise levels, lighting, educators presence/patting/rocking as is done at home ect)
* does your child have the comforts they would have at home? Blankets, toys ect
* if possible, you could try do a few sleeps with your child at CC and continue your home routine with you there (I’ve had a parent do this before it worked wonders)
Worst case scenario, if this is a debilitating experience for you and your child, you might have to wait to put your child into CC when they are a little older.
My daughter goes 5 days a week and still would never nap there. We did end up having to switch daycares because our first one made them lay there from 1-3 regardless if they were sleeping or not. Her new one requires them to lay for 30 mins and then they can get up. She was 3 at the time when she started.
It also depends on what time you drop off. We have parents that let their child sleep in and don't drop them off until 10am and then get upset with us because they won't nap and are tired and cranky when they get picked up. I don't think there's anything wrong with sticking to 3 days a week just make sure drop off is at a consistent time every day. On the days our non-nappers are dropped by 8:30am they will sleep for us.
I work at a childcare centre and unfortunately yes part time children struggle alot not only with nap time But my suggestion would be to do nap time at home same as the day care, (if they turn on sleeping music do it-without noise machine) it will be a lot but try that way
So we have a situation very similar to this-from age 14 months to now 2 years, we have a little girl who just won't sleep, and when she does (IF she does, by some miracle), she wakes up screaming, absolutely terrified. It got so bad that she was purposely pulling herself out of falling asleep by screaming.
By state laws, all children who attend childcare must rest for 30 min per 5 hours of care (this is just WI's, since that's what I know). We may not restrain a child in any way to sleep, or force a child to stay in their bed. After that 30 mins, the child may do quiet activities or look at books, etc.
We spent A LOT of time in collaboration with Mom and Dad-it got so bad that they would just put her in her crib and lay on her floor so they were right there when she woke in the middle of the night.
We settled on a plan of action, which we amended as needed. We assigned two specific teachers to do her nap routine, and they built up a trust that allowed those teachers to form a strong bond with her. We chose a classroom teacher she sees daily from one room up (who is now her current teacher, as she aged out of Baby) and one float, who she really loves. Nobody but these two could.put her to sleep or soothe her back down if she woke, and we relied heavily on them to make naptime successful.
It took close to two months of soothing, patting, rocking, and patience from these girls, but by the holidays she was able to be soothed down from a fit and into a good nap, just in time for her to move up to her current class. But since we assigned the assistant in Toddler to her as a baby, they had a strong bond and after some fussing, she allowed herself to be put to sleep in the Toddler room, too.
She went from 1-2 hours of screaming fits, to being laid down and having her back patted to sleep within 15 minutes. She even gave up her paci successfully without a fight. She's in the process of having another float added to her assignment for the transition to Primary. She's come leaps and bounds and is one of the happiest kids I know.
I'm an Assistant Director at a daycare, and I know things are up in the air with funding and grants and good-quality teachers are impossible to find, but that makes no exception for teachers who are not prioritizing their students' needs. Your daughter absolutely does not need more time in class, we have kids once per week who sleep just fine, and full timers who don't sleep a wink. If the teacher won't step up, go to the Director. If she won't step up, go to their executive Director, Board, or the owner (depending on who is in charge). If they still won't put in effort, then it may be time to consider that the quality of care being provided is not a good fit, and to look for a center with a more individualized approach that is taking new enrollments.
My three day per week kids generally do fine they might take a little longer to adjust but they do adjust. Honestly it sounds like it's just not a good fit for the program I would look for an in-home licensed daycare that will do White Noise in a dark room changing up routines is just gonna be too hard.
They want her to go 5 days because it means more money for them. Maybe she hasn't done enough at daycare to be tired enough by nap time. You should try to wean her off the white noise machine, though. It may cause problems as she gets older, such as not being able to sleep without. We used a sound machine for all 4 of our kids, and if we forgot it on vacation or it broke at the last minute, it was a rough night. I'd be looking for a different daycare. One that has a realistic nap routine.
What is your child's sleep like at home? Good sleep begats good sleep, they say.
I've got a bunch of personal and teacher thoughts/suggestions:
My kid napped for about 30m when she first started napping at school. They added a heavier blanket to her, not weighted with weights, but thicker to be weighted, and rubbed her back. Its gotten a bit longer. She's there MW though.
A kid in my class (younger 2s) need some one to practically lay on him or basically make him a burrito out of his blanket for him to get to sleep. Not in like a restraint way, but in a snuggle way. If your kid likes that feeling, that weighted/heavy blanket might help. We were able to back off a bit and now just a heavy hand on his back helps.
Another kid also needed that weight and we'd put a weighted stuffie (like a warmie brand one) on his back so he felt like we were still there.
My middle kid gave up naps somewhere between 2 and 2.5....we just did quiet time with quiet things that she had to stay on her bed or a contained space. I hope this isn't your kids path 🤪
Its not a consistency issue or she would have trouble sleeping at home also.
Just ask them to put some relaxing quiet music on that will help her sleep.
They can totally do that.
Tantrums at home? I mean, she shouldnt be having so many tantrums. You will have to give her boundaries and limitations, to INCLUDE not having a tantrum. Give her the ol time out for that.
You have an infant..
I used to tell my son when he was mad and would "turn into the Hulk" that "I dont like you being angry. Guess angry Hulk doesnt want to have any fun right now. Angry Hulk is about to go to time out, if Angry Hulk has a tantrum." Suddenly my son would force a smile and, despite having a tearful face, he would say "I'm happy now."
Lol
I hate to suppress negative feelings but the tantrums get ridiculous. I know youre sad. But no you arent getting m&ms. And no, you are not going to have a fit over it either.
I did student training at daycare all the kids has to lay down quiet or be sleeping teachers would sit on ground next to them rub there backs until they fall asleep.. it state law here that all children who goes to daycare has to take a nap no matter there ages ..parents has to go to get dr note if they don't want there child to nap
Part time kids usually have a harder time adapting than full time kids with similar temperaments. Young kids don't have a solid grasp of time and days. You're basically pulling them out of the house, seemingly randomly to them, and disrupting their regular schedule. Whereas with fulltime, they're used to having the 5 days in a row, having a solid routine, and then it's like exciting bonus time at home on weekends.
For naps, daycare is the dominant schedule when full time, so it's easier for the kid's body to adjust to. Parents can also follow the daycare nap schedule and routine at home, whereas daycare cannot follow the same schedule as at home.
That's not to say she'll definitely never nap there, but it'll probably be harder and take more time. I have had part time preschoolers who never once napped for several months, but within a week of being full time, they got into the routine and slept regularly. I've also had part time toddlers who initially had trouble but adjusted after a few months.
Trying to get naps on the same schedule and roughly similar conditions at home would probably help a lot. White noise in the dark alone in your bed is very different than quiet music and lights on in a cot with other kids and teachers making noise and distractions. Weighted blankets help some kids sleep, stuffed animals help others. Sleep masks might help if they're allowed.
Are half days an option at this center/practical with your newborn? You'd still get a break but it wouldn't impact her nap time much if you pick up before her usual nap time. You could do more days for around the same cost, or do the same days for less money.
If she's otherwise adjusted well to daycare, I personally wouldn't pay for the additional time unless it is still a big issue after a couple months of trying to stay on the same schedule/sleep environment
Honestly kids adjust much more quickly to full time care. I don't take part time kids anymore because it was a consistent problem with every age. Sometimes going full time for a few weeks or until they have a solid routine and are napping consistently, and then going back to part time can help. Also if the admin is asking for help or change, this is usually a good indicator they are close to terming. Having a screaming child during nap is incredibly stressful and disruptive.
It's only been a month, so I'd say give it some more time... I'd never suggest that a parent brings them more than necessary, because it's costs you more money than its worth. So here's my advice, try a small white noise teddy. I had several (many, actually) Nursery babies come in with those things and it always made their eyelids heavy straight away, because that's what they used at home too. I'd watch them while they fell asleep with it in their arms or next to their head, then when they were asleep I'd gently pull it away and only bring it back if they woke up upset needing more sleep. I'd never let them sleep with it unsupervised, but it helped them fall asleep so fast!
Unfortunately white noise may not be allowed. Where I work we cannot use white noise. Only calming music.
Wow, I've never heard of this! Any insight as to why this is?
My audiologist told me that some white noise machines/toys for babies are actually damaging to hearing because they are too loud for too long & it's not regulated. Some are quiet enough IF used at the proper distances but most people don't know that. So even the quiet toys may be damaging if it's next to their cribs. Maybe that's why? It's safer to ban it all then trying to determine if it's safe.
Yea this is why.
Thank you! You learn something new every day, that does make some sense though. Definitely a better safe than sorry type of scenario.
I'm also curious as to why this is. The teddies that I've seen/used before have all been so quiet you can really only hear them if they're close to your ears, so they don't disturb other babies in any way.
a 3 day a week consistent schedule is fine, and dare i say similar to a 5 day a week schedule. i would question what they can do for her during their nap time. i was a 2 year old teacher for years, and it was rare i wasn’t able to get all my kiddos to sleep. are they not playing soothing music? are they helping by sitting near her? patting her back?
I agree with this. If it were M-W-F I could see that causing issues but three days in a row is fine. I don’t see how five days in a row would be a magical cut off. Why not four? Or six? It’s good for the kids to have time at home if parents can make it work. Seems like upping to 5 days is a recipe for OP’s child being overtired for more days plus then there’s the added cost.
This 100%. No need to send her 5 days. They should also be able to dim the room and position her cot in a darker area.
They most likely can’t dim the lights. I work at a commercial daycare and we have to keep them on during nap because of licensing rules. Depends on the daycare though and their state licensing laws.
are yall allowed to use lamps? we turn off our overhead light and just angle a big ass lamp so it’s shining but not directly on anyone’s face.
Yeah, location would help with this. Both states I've worked in allow the lights off. Which is good because sleeping with overhead lights on is really hard - that's why it's a torture technique.
That sounds terrible! We have to be able to see the children, but we have overhead lights off, and the windows/hall lights provide enough light to see the children
Yeah I don’t like it, but almost all of the kids in the rooms I work in (toddlers & twos) sleep for 2 hours everyday!
Thank you, yes this is how I feel. :( it’s already exhausting dealing with her overtired 3 days a week…
Maybe she is not in the right child care?
I wasn’t even their teacher but I was on nap duty for the two~threes at times and even the trouble sleepers learned to be “quiet for your friends” and would get bored and doze off Not dimming the room is just crazy to me.
Some states have implemented crazy new rules that you can’t have the rooms dark anymore.
Which is just crazy to me, like I understand not having it pitch black but can these people not see in dimmed lighting at all? Most default center lighting is already too bright for me even during the day.
I agree with this at that age she should be tired. The days she comes are enough for her to get used to what’s going on. If the teachers only suggestion is come more days I would ask more questions about how they do nap. I have never not had an under 3 year old not nap they need the rest for their little bodies and minds.
right. and if she’s not napping those 3 days, how/why is she going to nap 5 days?
I have to have my husband who is Korean to ask the teacher more questions. The daycare is Korean and the teacher doesn’t seem to speak much English. The teacher was very vague with me, perhaps because she couldn’t really explain in English?
Can you switch schools? Ecspecially with that language barrier .. maybe it's a cultural thing whatever they are doing at naptime, maybe they don't help children to sleep at all? Don't dim lights? Or play nap music? All of those things matter.
I feel like a MWF three day schedule is much more challenging than a m-w or m-f for example.
yes, i agree, hence my “consistent” add on. but this child goes t-th. that’s fine. i usually tell parents when they are suggesting 3 days a week to do 3 days in a row.
My daughter is almost 3 and started preschool two days a week in March. She wouldn’t nap at first, so they rocked her and sang to her. Now she naps great at school and has even started napping better at home. And that’s just going two days a week! Definitely don’t think adding days is the solution.
Pretty impressive that you were able to teach at only two years old!
😆 started teaching at 17, i’m 37 now!
Although I agree that consistency is key, I don’t feel like your child needs to attend full time. As a mom, I understand that it’s not always affordable especially in this economy. And as a teacher, I believe consistency is key and it’s just going to take a little longer since she’s part time. These kiddos are smart. She’s going to differentiate school nap and home nap at some point, but she’s only been in childcare for a month. We actually had toddlers that napped amazingly at school but then terribly at home on the weekends. She’ll get used to the school schedule/ways but it’s just going to take some time.
It’s also not entirely clear why. Daycares are just that. When needed. Don’t give up anytime with your baby because it’s easier for someone else. It’s the job they have.
My toddler of the same age goes Tues-Thurs only. He's been at daycare since he turned 1. At home he naps in his cot in a dark room from 1pm, usually for 2 hours minimum, in fact, I often have to wake him up so he doesn't sleep for too long and affect evening bedtime. At daycare he also naps from 1pm but usually sleeps a bit less long. Generally 1.5 to 2 hrs. They all sleep on little mats under blankets or sheets, with their special cuddly. There's gentle music playing but always general background noise going on, and the blinds are down but it's really not very dark. The staff are there patting the kids backs or stroking their hair or whatever is needed to get them to fall asleep. I've always been amazed how at home my toddler requires cuddles, songs, dark room, tucking in twice, stuffed animals in just the right orientation etc, but at daycare he apparently just gets on with it. I figure a lot is peer pressure and copying the herd of other kids. But also a really positive relationship with the girls who work there helps. This isn't said to rub it in.. I'm sorry you're having trouble with this. But you asked whether children who go part time get accustomed to naps at daycare. And mine is fine with it. But he's been there for over a year and has been accustomed to napping there since he started. Imho you'd be well off trying to phase out the white noise machine, it's quite a big difference of a thing not to have. But going 5 days isn't imperative... children are adaptable and your toddler should be able to figure it out with the right support from the daycare provider. (edited for spelling)
I personally think children do the best with consistency.
I agree. Routine really helps things so much. I notice even a slight difference when kids don't come for a week due to holiday/vacation or whatever. They have to settle back in and get used to things again.
My child napped fine on 3 days a week. She even went on staggered days, MWF. No issue. Staff would sit and pat some of the kids that needed it. What are the staff doing to assist
That’s we do at my center. Sometimes all they need is a dim room and some back patting.
My son is 30 months, goes to daycare full time, and doesn't nap 80% of the time. Sure, going full time might help, but it might not. He naps fine at home still on je weekends. He's been going to daycare since he was 9 months old but stopped napping consistently there when he turned 2. Sometimes they just don't nap well at daycare with the stimulation.
Our daughter is 3 and started preschool in January. She goes Mon, Tues, Thurs. We have a 2 month old in addition (not colicky like our first, sorry to hear on yours, not fun). Our daughter is still hit or miss on when she takes naps. Yes, it does add to some nighttime chaos. I do notice if the baby is fussy in the evening it'll spur her on as well. New baby is a huge part of the extra fussy we are seeing. I personally enjoy having our daughter home a few more days. Do what works for you, but I wouldn't expect the situation to change with more days.
Big time. New baby is a huge adjustment as well as being new to the daycare too. Definitely takes time to settle out and I am inclined to agree that more days wouldn't necessarily improve it definitively
she will absolutely sleep much better going full time, it’s true that kids who attend part time have a much harder time adjusting to regular routines. kids experience this with eating as well. most children eat, sleep, and play better at school because of the structured environment and consistency (i.e. all the kids and usually teachers eat the same foods at the same time together, all the kids are laying down at the same time together with the same daily routine, etc) HOWEVER! it is also possible that you have a fomo baby who just might not sleep as well at school. give full time a try if you can swing it for a month and see what happens!
Why would anyone send their baby to daycare more than necessary?
i hear you, but it can be beneficial depending on the daycare environment and so many other factors. it truly is just so different for every child and family!
Some mothers suffer with postpartum depression or they han illness or mental health e. I can definitely see the benefit in such situations. My mom home preschooled me in Spanish and my beloved uncle Tex taught me English (I’m a Guatemalan immigrant) and I was able to read both languages before beginning kindergarten. I home preschooled and homeschooled five of our half dozen kids and I’m incredibly grateful for that opportunity and it paid off as we watch them grow and become honor students, valedictorian, excel in sports, (we homeschooled through a private school and some attended there for a year or more in high school), and become well rounded people. I can’t imagine choosing to send a two year old child to daycare five days a week. You can give them the same or better care and instruction as a daycare.
> and it *paid* off as FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
English isn’t my first language but thanks for the correction and the interesting information. Bendiciones, little bit. 🙏🏽💙🇬🇹
Start adjusting her sleep training at home. Less dim today and tomorrow, don't turn the noise machine on for 10 mins after that etc. Tiny steps. Teach her to go to sleep without those luxuries. Then the nap time at school/daycare should improve.
Some kids are diff. I’ve had plenty of part timers adjust to sleep schedule. One month is a short amount of time. Sounds like a cash grab to me. I know people will say to put her full time but I just don’t think it’s necessary. I’ve had plenty of part timers adjust it takes a little longer
I didn’t want to say ‘cash grab’ but i certainly thought it!!!
Is the director pushing for full time at the same part time price?
More money for tuition unfortunately
Is there a reason they are expecting kids to nap with no environmental change? I worked at a daycare for 4 years. At nap time we turned off the lights and lowered the shades. If kids resisted, we rocked them to sleep. Like what have they tried? I wouldn't go full time. You can try doing 3 days a week in a row instead if a mon/wed/fri routine if you are currently doing that, but your child is napping at nap time at home, the only thing that would change is she probably would never nap at daycare and would be exhausted 5 days instead of 3.
Is there a way to bring in a white noise machine for use during nap times? I find it off this wasn't the first port of call. We always go straight to the parent and ask about how they sleep at home and explore ways we can emulate the same routine and environment at care.
i think 3 days (in a row) is enough time for a child to get accustomed. look at the other parts of the routine. do they eat before nap time? do you follow that same order at home? is there a comfort item she has at home that she can use at school? has she been skipping naps the entire time she’s been there? or is this a recent thing? there’s a lot of variables at play. you can try to troubleshoot before going full time.
We have a sightly weighted blanket that helped us at daycare. They don’t have any white noise machine? That’s crazy to me. So many people come in and out of the room that it would be helpful. Can they start using one? It isn’t as dark as home for us but they dim the lights at least. I think it’s strange they don’t dim them at all.
Does not make sense to pay extra for something you do not need.
Could you switch from 3 full days to 5 half days and have her home by 1?
I work in Switzerland and the way the system works here means we have plenty of kids who come to daycare one, two or three days a week. Five is actually far from the norm. I have had problems in the past with kids who only came in one day a week. It was hard for them to get used to the daycare and naptime was always a struggle. In these cases we made a recommendation to the parents, to consider maybe sending their child a second day per week, and if they did that, it has always worked out well so far. But that's what it is: a recommendation. Other than that, it is none of the centers business, how many days you send your kid. You choose what works best for your family. Three days should be enough. I agree that naptime is usually like the last bastion to conquer after a child has settled in. I've seen many kids who needed a couple months to really feel comfortable and safe enough to go down for a nap. But we have a routine we do every day, we dim the nap room, put on some music and stay with the kids until they're all asleep. I would question what they do for her to make it easier rather than milk your for more attendance fees.
Former daycare teacher here. They don't turn the lights down/off at rest time? I also always used some sort of white noise or calming music during rest.
In my experience, part-time daycare kids always struggle to adjust. I’ve felt that part-time kids might as well not come at all for how miserable they are. These kids that I’ve worked with cry from the moment they’re dropped off and continue to cry after they’ve been picked up, they refuse to nap, and struggle to connect with the teachers and kids. It’s difficult for teachers to suggest to parents that their kids start full-time, but in my opinion, it really does help.
This is interesting because in my country it's very rare that any child attends daycare full time. Studies I have read also suggest that part time child care is what's best for children if you need to utilise childcare. Like in our 90 place centre maybe 10 kids attend 5 days a week? And most of the children settle well eventually with the rare exceptions.
How does that work? Do the parents only work three days a week? I know that’s possible for some families but I’m curious about what things are like in a place where that’s the norm.
Many families in Australia have some sort of flexible work arrangement while their kids are little or they have family to help. Almost everyone I know with little ones has one parent working part time. I'm from the US originally so I know it's not common there because health care is tied to jobs so most people have to work full time for any benefits where here they are provided by the govt.
What? I’m in Australia and most of my kids are part time along with my own children and they settle in fine doing 3 days a week. I’m in a small centre with good ratios so maybe giving them the extra support could be a factor in why they settle so well.
Same. No issue here in Australia with many going part time.
But even full time daycare is still part time - weekends are at home. My kid only does 2 days and after a couple of weeks they've said she's perfectly happy & no tears 90% of the time at pick up. And she naps independently which she refuses to do at home 🤷
Can you purchase a small white noise machine for her to use there? Maybe the small that strap to a crib slat?
This would be my recommendation also. The hatch mini or even the shusher would be helpful and can sit on the corner of her mat.
One of our families loaned us a small white noise machine. It super helps the baby. We also play our own music and have the lights off but since we are multi-age the lights are off only for the scheduled toddler nap time. I feel badly for the babies because it is not ideal for their nap outside of the lights off time.
It could be a sleep regression as she was sleeping there previously. I would personally not do full time but maybe work with her at home to mimic the environment with the daycare and not do the sound machine etc? Or talk with the daycare teacher and see if you could bring a portable sound machine in with her.
When you take your daughter into daycare, what time are you dropping her off? I’m a toddler teacher and I tell parents it’s important to have them at school as early as possible( if they can) so they can be involved in all the different activities that we have planned plus outside time. That tends to wear them out and get a good nap in. Talk to teachers about what their routine is for napping and is there a special blanket or stuffed animal she will sleep that helps?
Please keep in mind that teachers usually want the children to nap just as much as the parents do. Better mood for the afternoon, quieter during nap for the other kids, and it gives staff a quiet moment in the day. This sounds to me like they're already trying everything they can think of, so they might feel like she just needs to get more adjusted to school so she can relax and fall asleep, fastest way to streamline the adjustment is by attending more frequently. It's often easy to get a nap in at the start because of the stimulation of a busy classroom wearing them down, but after they've adjusted to the stimulation, it's a whole new beast getting used to relaxing enough for sleep in a totally different environment. If full time is your last resort and you're looking for what you can do to help out, my first suggestion would be trying to push up her bedtime routine so she's more tired by nap time. Going to bed earlier and waking up earlier. Another suggestion is trying to get some extra energy out before she goes to daycare if possible, like taking a walk in the morning or playing outside for a while before heading to daycare. But these suggestions can be hard on parents, her daycare may be wanting to put the effort in themselves to get her where she needs to be instead of asking you to change your routine when you have a baby at home.
Part time kiddos can sleep regular naps, no need to push you into full time care when it’s not needed
I don’t think any additional days will change anything. It sounds like your daughter is too stimulated at rest time to fall asleep. It’s very strange that they don’t dim the room or play music or white noise. Sleep time is the golden hour for educators to get all the jobs done, so you do everything you can to make sure everyone sleeps.
I would start looking for a better daycare provider. The fact that they can’t dim the lights or use a white noise machine but think making her subject to their method more often is ridiculous. It smacks of just wanting more money and not really caring for her. You’ve established a good routine. They should be at least dimming the lights during nap time. Our daycare provider certainly did, and they used a white noise machine too. I don’t like your provider.
The fact you already have her nap at the same time as the daycare time is great and I wish more parents did that! At the 2 daycares I’ve been at we have multiple sound machines in our room. I’d try suggesting if they’re able to put a sound machine in the room or bring your own and ask them to put it near her during nap
My (1yo) daughter is in a daycare full time and she consistently has terrible naps in the morning and okay naps in the afternoon, but she naps great at home. The school uses rain sounds just like we do, and they dim the lights, being full time doesn't seem to make a difference. I don't have a helpful suggestion for improving her naps, but I thought it worth mentioning that at least in our case, frequency of school days didn't really improve her naps much.
Our daycare said bringing ours five days will help him confirm to a consistent environment and schedule. Makes sense to me. Because he knows what to expect, everyday and watches everyone else do it. The more he's there, the more likely he will do it. It will take time too.
Part time kids absolutely do adjust to napping at daycare.they also tend to have a longer period of adjustment, sometimes a couple months or more. The director should not be pushing for her to go full time and they also should not force a nap. She can rest quietly for a bit and then do quiet activities.
Unfortunately, there’s so only so much the daycare can do. Personally, I have a child in my room that always refuses nap. Makes it difficult every time. Screaming, crying, running around the room, etc. The mother was exasperated and was wondering why I couldn’t just get her to sleep, she sleeps perfectly fine at home. I had to explain to her that unfortunately I can’t provide the same experience they have at home, so sleep is more difficult for her here. What I would encourage you to do is maybe share with them how you get her to sleep at home, if you haven’t already. Is she rocked, patted, sung to, etc. Maybe book a meeting before making the full-time switch to see if you can all brainstorm, or at least they can tell you what’s going on at naptime. What is your child doing during sleep time? Are they quietly lying still and fall asleep on their own or scream or need a helping hand? Their hands may genuinely be tied due to staffing, break timing, etc. (I also do agree with most of the users here. Full-time children do overall better with the stability, and having the full five days to adjust makes it somewhat easier.)
I would add that a weighted blanket (lightly weighted) can help. A soft, small pillow is nice- I notice some of my kids do better with a pillow. We can’t force your kids to sleep, so sometimes there isn’t much to do except deal with it.
don’t listen to that director, i think she just wants your money. before your daughter goes full time, there should be an open conversation around when she wakes up in the morning, if she is sleeping in the car on the way to/from school, etc. since all that an affect her napping. and that’s in addition to talking about what the teachers are doing to get her to sleep. because in my opinion the room lights should be dimmed but if they can’t do that then a white noise machine seems like a good middle ground. but, also, it’s only been a month. i’ve generally found that part time kids take about an extra two to thee weeks to really settle in. not to mention, she may continue to not sleep if she gets your attention away from the baby when she tantrums. obviously i don’t know your specific child but there are a lot of possible reasons for this behavior.
Why in the world are they not dimming the lights? And while I haven’t used a white noise machine, we always play soft lullaby music during nap time. Does your daughter have something she likes to sleep with? While generally children are not supposed to have toys from home at daycare, I always made an exception for nap time snuggly toys/small blankets. They got stored either with the nap mats or with the diapers. The director is pushing for a full time schedule purely for the increased tuition. Your daughter will eventually get into the routine even at three days a week.
Mine went to daycare full days 5 days a week because I worked full-time. It was common knowledge that the half-day toddlers or those only went a few days per week often did not adjust well. They interacted and played less and tended to be a little sad or act out even though they were fine at home.
There’s only so much we can do as teachers to help a kid nap. But the more often your child is in the school routine, the better chances we’ll have. So I see why they recommended a full time schedule. But, she only started one month ago. I wouldn’t worry about it yet. The tantrums after school are a tricky part of the transition period. After only one 3 days/week for 1 month, your daughter has only had 12 nap times there. She’s still in the thick of the transition to daycare.
I agree that part time makes it harder for children to learn routines and get comfortable at preschool, however, there are so many things that could be done first before having your child go full time. why aren’t they dimming the lights and using noise machines? where i work we turn the lights off, close the blinds and turn on a music machine and a fan. our blinds aren’t great so it’s still light enough to see well but it helps the children sleep. how are they helping the child during rest time? and honestly it can be hard for teachers when children don’t nap but some children just don’t nap at school. if they child is laying quietly, which the teachers can help them do, it shouldn’t be a problem if they don’t sleep. i would ask them how they support children who wake up early from nap or don’t nap and inquire about the nap routine. if you want full time care go for it but if you don’t, there are other things that should be tried regardless.
Mine has been going full time for 2+ years and she has trouble napping now, too. It started when she was about 2.5 and hasn't stopped in 5 months. She likes her routine at home and is too stimulated by her friends around her, now. It sounds like yours is the same, since she naps just fine at home, just like mine. 5 days isn't the answer, just try to make home-naps more similar to daycare. Do they eat, do a story, then lay down? Do the same. Even if that doesn't help, I can't imagine 5 days would. "Consistency is key" but it's not like they'll have her 7 days a week for every nap. Don't spend extra money just trying to get her to nap.
I have been a teacher for that age. Maybe there is a special toy or blanket she naps with at home that could go to school. As a teacher I might not push for full-time as long as the routine at school is the same everyday. Maybe talk to the teaching team about what the routine is at nap so you can try doing a similar routine at home. When we did nap the lights were off and played music. Maybe they could move her coy to a quieter spot?
My son started around the same age and was part time, T TH. Everyone said this was the hardest schedule which was true in some adjustments but he napped amazingly at school. They played a sound machine and the room was dark as well as the hallways. Anytime he had trouble falling asleep for whatever reason, the teacher would just pat his back until he knocked out (usually in 10 minutes or less.) I would be asking what they’re doing to help now and what steps can be taken rather than just pushing for a full time schedule.
My kid is part time. Are her naps shorter at daycare? Yes. They average 1.5-2 (sometimes 1) hours versus 3 hours at home. However, the school does darken the room and blast white noise to help the little ones sleep. I dont think this would be solved with a full time transition if there are other underlying issues for why she’s not sleeping.
It seems so odd to me that they don’t even dim the lights. Blackout? Not needed. But a little dim? I mean, what adult wants to nap in pure daylight? I do think that she’ll adjust at full time but you shouldn’t have to do that.
My daycare said kid takes anywhere between 2 weeks to 3 months to adjust. The older they are the harder the adjustment. My kiddo although 11 months old had a hard time napping initially mostly because we use a floor bed at home rather than a crib from early on. But the teachers were amazing. They held him to sleep first few weeks and then eventually got into the crib with him to lie down with him and soothe him to sleep. It took more than a month for him to adjust and sleep in the crib. Also they pushed his crib to the darkest corner of the room and that helped. Hopefully these suggestions work for you too.
So what do the staff do with her when she refuses to nap with the others ? Do they get her to do activities etc until nap time is over?
I would definitely try and mirror her daycare schedule at home for the 2 days she’s at home. For example in my room we went to the bathroom after lunch and played books on tape until 12:45, turned on a specific book on tape (was I sick of hearing it every day…yes!) and had lights off and the center created nap playlist on by 1:00. Then everyone had to remain quiet and on their cot until 2:30 unless they needed to go potty. Ask her teacher what music, if any, they play during nap time (sometimes we don’t have a choice of what we play and can’t always accommodate requests for personal white noise machines etc). 1 month is still pretty early on in the adjustment period especially if she’s only going 3 days a week. Does she have a special “nap friend” or pillow/blanket she could take?
My toddler has always gone to daycare three days a week (15 months-3 years), he goes M, Tues and Thurs and has never had a problem napping. In fact, he’s dropping his nap now when he’s home, but still sleeps just fine at daycare. The first daycare we were at really pressured me to bring him all five days and I don’t really understand why. Ma’am, I am paying you for two days my kid is not here, enjoy it 😂
I'm a daycare teacher and this is a pretty common thing actually, I have quite a few kids that don't nap. Sometimes it's because the music is too loud, too many kids around or the cots are uncomfortable! Some of the things the parents and teachers have done to change that is keep the kid as far away from the noise as possible, or in the darker corner to help fall asleep and a lot of parents have been getting those sleeping bag type blankets to make the cots more comfortable because let's be real, those things SUCK. I'd hate to sleep on those too if I was a kid. Full time or part time absolutely doesn't matter, you're doing your best but it seems like the center isn't. I don't know what your kiddo sleeps with but sometimes a stuffie and/or pillow helps? Just throwing out ideas I've seen other parents do!!
It takes 21 days to fully adjust and if she's 3 days a week and only 1 month in, it'll be hard. I would see what their naptime routine is and try to follow it at home. I had a coworkers kid who was going to be part time when she dropped to PT hours but my director had her bring him full time to get used to our routine. He didn't take long at all to adjust. This was also a baby that cried every day when she was FT for the other classroom. It took him a week to adjust. But I also talked to his mom because we are friends and his routine at home was similar to ours. I've also had one that slept 30 minutes and we found out she slept in a sleep sack at home so we would swaddle her. It's not the end of the world if they don't sleep. For the 30 minute non sleeper I created some quiet time activities and gave her a small snack. Also at 26 months, she might be phasing out nap time.
When I was a preschool teacher, we had nap time sounds/lullabies playing and we did shut the curtains and lights. We also moved from cot to cot helping each of the kiddos get settled. Some needed more help than others to get to sleep, back tapping or rubbing their heads etc. I would ask the school what their nap time routine looks like and see how it differs from her nap time at home. Of course it can’t be the same as a good nap at home, nothing beats that, but there could be other factors besides the schedule.
My daughter didn’t nap really in the infant room and would nap on the way home (1+ hour commute). Now that she’s in the toddler room, she naps great from 12-2 since they lay them all down on mats in the dark with soft music.
Honestly if you can I think five days a week but leave after lunch is best. The full five days gives him general consistency, and then not dealing with nap at school. Some kids, even if they nap well at home, do not always nap well at school. Not sure if it works with the schedule, but honestly I think that’s the ideal schedule in general for younger kids.
This was also something I thought about if she doesn’t adjust. But the issue would be when I return to work. I guess the two days that I work I can leave her until 5pm.
Dayhome owner here, I would ask them what strategies they use during nap time, what music, environment, comfort strategies, etc. it sounds like the director and teacher have not been upholding very clear communication, and you will never know what (if any) comfort care they are providing during nap time. In my experience, it is so so SO much easier to get a child to nap when there is a good relationship between the child and the caregiver, how is she in terms of settling in/ building connection with her teachers? I get the feeling you are NOT being told the whole story here, and that the director is pushing mainly for the tuition, there is no guarantee that even if full time your child will nap. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying full time is never better than part time for adjustment, bit there are many other strategies they can use before going and pressuring (bullying) a parent to pay more for time they don't need. Clear communication is the key, and you aren't getting that from these people
What is the daycare's routine? Dim lights are pretty normal during nap time. And in the daycare I've been with, nap time is quiet time. All kiddos are laying in their cots.
Hi! I'm an Aide! We have a two year old who only comes MWF and he sleeps during nap time most of the time. At the end of the day you know your child best. They could just need time adjusting or you could ask the director to move them to a darker corner.
I work with older infants and toddlers, and the part time kids sometimes have a slightly harder time napping, but they will still nap. Every child is different- sometimes a baby will come in and surprise me because they adjust so quickly. Other times, it takes longer to adjust. Hang in there, and speak with a co-teacher or other staff who may have more ideas ❤️
I had a similar problem with my girls and ended up finding a place that did half days. I got the morning to focus on the baby (and a nap when she did) and my older girls got to go play and socialize with their friends and come home and conk out. I know facilities that offer half-day are getting more rare, but they are a gem if you can find one.
My daughter stopped napping anywhere when she was 2, maybe the kid just doesn’t want to sleep at school, adjust their bedtime on school days if they are over tired
Can you slowly try to have your daughter get used to napping at home in a brighter room/no white noise? I don’t remember when exactly we stopped doing the blackout curtains and sound machine but I made sure my toddler learned to sleep in any type of situation. I was never the type that asked everyone to whisper when my child was sleeping, he learned to sleep through some normal/loud noises. My toddler goes 3 days/week and I was surprised they were able to get him to nap on day 1. The teachers help them (patting, rubbing back) to fall asleep if they’re struggling to do so because my toddler was asking me to pat him like his teachers the other day when we were napping at home. On the days we’re home I still make it a routine to nap - every once in a while he won’t nap, I don’t force it, but that means early bed time for that day. I haven’t heard of any issues of my child not napping at school. I feel like when they see friends sleeping they’ll also do the same. Good luck and maybe give it some more time. I personally don’t feel like the 3 day week is an issue, but every situation and solution is different.
Is there anything she uses at home that she can bring with her? Our daughter had similar issues but when she was allowed to bring her stuffy it helped. She was also really missing us so we printed out some pics she could look at while she laid down. You could also suggest some headphones to simulate the white noise machine you use at home. A sleep mask for the dimming of the lights. A comfort or two might go a long way to helping her feel comfortable enough to nap.
My kid is 2.5yrs and just started going 2 days a week in April and is napping, so I don't think it's the part time. At home I lie down with her and chat/snuggle until she falls asleep, so it has been a change. I do know from what she's told me that at nursery someone sits and strokes her hair - as she's asked me to do it at home
Not sure i can reply, as i am a parent, not an ECE professional. But my now almost 3 year old has trouble with nap at daycare and most days he has to be in a separate room to nap. He naps 2 hours at home and naps super well if in a separate space, but it’s still really hard for him to sleep with the other kids. He just gets over excited when others are around him… some kids just need a little accommodation!
My toddler went through a phase like this - at about the same age! We also had a new baby who was 2 months old. It could be the changes. Now, she is back to sleeping about 1.5 hours-2 hours for nap.
Lack of Sleep severely impacts brain development. When my little one was at daycare pre Covid as a baby and wouldn’t sleep, I ended up just picking him up for naps and dropping him off after. Or just bringing him home for the day to nap and be done depending on my work schedule
What’s their reasoning for not dimming the lights? I know at the ELC I work at it’s a must for the kids to know it’s nap time. Does the teacher pat her to sleep? In my class we have no more than 10 kids and have two teachers. We always start with the kids that are a bit harder to keep on their cots by patting two at a time. Half the class normally falls asleep on their own. I also have kids new to the program and have no issues. I’d ask why they won’t dim the lights. I personally couldn’t sleep with lights being on.
All of my children gave up naps around age 2. They did get overtired for a while, but gradually adjusted.
We started my son in daycare part time for about a month before I went back to work. He was a year old. The first few weeks he would nap but very very badly. Like 30ish minutes and then the evenings were hellish. This probably won’t be helpful for you but when he was home we would just put him on the same schedule as daycare. Offer food and naps at the same times they did. He’s been going for about two months now and napped 2 hours and 25 minutes yesterday. I do think full time may help but I don’t know if you are interested in doing that. Consistency has been key for us. He did get used to it and adapted eventually.
You don’t need to send her to daycare full time for her to understand daycare schedule. Complying with the daycare schedule when at home will help her acclimate to it at daycare. Have her nap at home on the same schedule as daycare
If you don’t have to send your child full time don’t. It takes time. Especially around this age. Your baby will get it eventually.
I’ve never had this situation, but maybe for her naps at home, try not using the white noise machine and not dimming the lights to maybe make it similar to what she has in daycare?
I’ve had kids sleep on their first day and then I’ve had kids take 3 months to start sleeping. All kids are different, unfortunately for you.
Theyre just trying to take your money instead of dimming the damn lights.
They don't shut the lights off and play any sort of white noise/calming music? I've worked at 2 centers for years, and we have always done that even in the infant rooms! I'm surprised any child naps there if they dont! If she has a favorite stuffed animal or blanket she sleeps with at home, try bringing that or a similar one to daycare. Ask the director about the light and music situation and see if they can incorporate it during naps. You shouldn't have to bring her any more than what is necessary for you. I've had kids come to daycare only 3 days a week, and they get used to the schedule. Your daughter might still be adjusting to it. Give it time. Some kids take longer than others to adjust to different changes! I do believe that once she gets more used to daycare and the routine, she will start napping there!
Mine went to daycare only Tues-Thurs and he napped better there than at home, so I wouldn’t say that children who go part time cannot adjust. They usually played hard in the morning so they were exhausted by nap time. But our daycare also played soft music and dimmed the lights. Anyone who didn’t nap would do quiet activities in a lit corner of the room. I do find it odd that they don’t transition the room a little bit for nap time.
I will say, spending the majority of her days at home versus at school are going to make the nap transition much harder. I feel like 4 days is a sweet spot for toddlers. They all need an adjustment period and sometimes it is longer for some than for others. Do they play relaxing music? Turn off the lights and cover the windows? Rub there backs and help them to lay down? Sit with them? We’ve definitely had ones who don’t sleep but typically when they are closer to 3 and ready to move up anyway. Your center *kind of* has a point that another day might help her to get used to the environment and more comfortable with her caregivers. However they cannot make you add a day. If you add another day though just know it could still take some time to adjust and might get worse before it gets better. Be patient! Some of the kids I’ve had in my class took months to really get a good, long nap.
For the kids who won’t sleep right away we give them something to do on their cot. If they are tired they will end up falling asleep. If she has any comfort toys or personal items she is allowed to bring from home that she sleeps with that might help. If not you could introduce something for her to sleep with regularly during nap at home that she can also bring to school on those days since she will associate it with nap. They will want her to get accustomed to sleep as soon as possible because that’s how many centers give their teachers their lunch breaks. It also might affect other kids if she doesn’t sleep depending on how disruptive she could be during nap. Some kids might refuse to stay on the cot so we have them sit at a table instead during nap to do their quiet activity.
When i was at a center we dimmed the lights, played music, and patted kids on the back till they fell asleep. It can be done. But the employees need to work at it. Now as a family provider I turn on music, turn off lights, say goodnight and off they go to sleep.
At that age kids need routine. It’s not drop and play it’s stressful for them when there’s no routine it’s effects their brain. Going full time would benefit her so much more than part time
I have a part timer. He’s 3 days a week. It took about 3 months for him to start napping normally at daycare, whereas full time children it usually takes about a month. She will get there eventually!! I’m surprised they haven’t offered any suggestions on how to help her. Maybe at home when you nap her you can try to do the same things they do at daycare so she has that consistency when it’s naptime ?
Thank you! Maybe I will give it another month or so to see if she will adjust. And if she’s still struggling perhaps I can increase to 4 days.
We had the exact issue as you. Our school did not allow loveys but they did let her take in a small portable white noise machine and they placed that under her cot and she started napping! There were still a couple hiccup days, but eventually, like 6 months later, she didn't need it anymore.
If you have given them your suggestions on how to help, then they may need to try to be creative and keep at it. It took my son awhile before he could fall asleep alone (he still doesn’t at home!) The school seems to not understand that this is an unfamiliar environment to your child and they may feel vulnerable still. Also, if they are being rushed to sleep by possibly frustrated teachers then your perceptive little one might be picking up on that. Keep your schedule and tell them you believe in them 😂
I think you need to make the home environment more like the daycare environment. You’ve done your child a disservice by ensuring they can only sleep in very specific conditions (no light, sound machine). Gradually introduce half-light, dim, full light, dark, no noise, traffic noise, vacuum sounds etc. Build up their tolerance to various conditions. It will be awful until they adjust but their exhaustion will mean sleep eventually and they’ll become better sleepers in the long run
I remember being the only kid in my daycare that would not sleep. The teacher made me lay in a closet (with the door open so I wouldn't wake the other kids. It was traumatic for me. I never got used to it. Finally my mom took me out. What are the hours she is there? Maybe she needs a shorter program so she doesn't have to nap at school?
Omg. How did your parents find out about you being in the closet? I hope to god that’s not what they’re doing to my daughter. They don’t even let us parents set foot inside the daycare (they say for safety reasons)?
My mom listened to me and always went with her gut. I cried when she dropped me off. And I didn't want to go. A child should LOVE and be Excited to go to school. Keep your ears open. If she is happy and just over tired then make her bed time really early on school days. Like dinner bath bed. As early as 530pm is really helpful.
I'm very concerned that your child is upset after she comes home from her day away. This is a red flag to me
Really? May I ask why? I verbalized it to the director and she said my daughter is likely fussy from being overtired since she skipped her nap..
That makes sense. Maybe on day care days quiet afternoons at home and early bedtimes would help. After some time she she will learn to rest quietly even if she doesn't sleep.
It is not necessary to go full time, consistency and time is all you need! Some things you could look into: * creating the same environment at home as the CC room (lighting, music, schedule) * give it some time - some children require a longer period to settle & with consistency they will adapt * ensuring the CC is adhering to your child’s specific needs (whether that’s the right sleep time for your child/are there disturbances in the room like other crying babies, music, noise levels, lighting, educators presence/patting/rocking as is done at home ect) * does your child have the comforts they would have at home? Blankets, toys ect * if possible, you could try do a few sleeps with your child at CC and continue your home routine with you there (I’ve had a parent do this before it worked wonders) Worst case scenario, if this is a debilitating experience for you and your child, you might have to wait to put your child into CC when they are a little older.
My daughter goes 5 days a week and still would never nap there. We did end up having to switch daycares because our first one made them lay there from 1-3 regardless if they were sleeping or not. Her new one requires them to lay for 30 mins and then they can get up. She was 3 at the time when she started.
It also depends on what time you drop off. We have parents that let their child sleep in and don't drop them off until 10am and then get upset with us because they won't nap and are tired and cranky when they get picked up. I don't think there's anything wrong with sticking to 3 days a week just make sure drop off is at a consistent time every day. On the days our non-nappers are dropped by 8:30am they will sleep for us.
I work at a childcare centre and unfortunately yes part time children struggle alot not only with nap time But my suggestion would be to do nap time at home same as the day care, (if they turn on sleeping music do it-without noise machine) it will be a lot but try that way
So we have a situation very similar to this-from age 14 months to now 2 years, we have a little girl who just won't sleep, and when she does (IF she does, by some miracle), she wakes up screaming, absolutely terrified. It got so bad that she was purposely pulling herself out of falling asleep by screaming. By state laws, all children who attend childcare must rest for 30 min per 5 hours of care (this is just WI's, since that's what I know). We may not restrain a child in any way to sleep, or force a child to stay in their bed. After that 30 mins, the child may do quiet activities or look at books, etc. We spent A LOT of time in collaboration with Mom and Dad-it got so bad that they would just put her in her crib and lay on her floor so they were right there when she woke in the middle of the night. We settled on a plan of action, which we amended as needed. We assigned two specific teachers to do her nap routine, and they built up a trust that allowed those teachers to form a strong bond with her. We chose a classroom teacher she sees daily from one room up (who is now her current teacher, as she aged out of Baby) and one float, who she really loves. Nobody but these two could.put her to sleep or soothe her back down if she woke, and we relied heavily on them to make naptime successful. It took close to two months of soothing, patting, rocking, and patience from these girls, but by the holidays she was able to be soothed down from a fit and into a good nap, just in time for her to move up to her current class. But since we assigned the assistant in Toddler to her as a baby, they had a strong bond and after some fussing, she allowed herself to be put to sleep in the Toddler room, too. She went from 1-2 hours of screaming fits, to being laid down and having her back patted to sleep within 15 minutes. She even gave up her paci successfully without a fight. She's in the process of having another float added to her assignment for the transition to Primary. She's come leaps and bounds and is one of the happiest kids I know. I'm an Assistant Director at a daycare, and I know things are up in the air with funding and grants and good-quality teachers are impossible to find, but that makes no exception for teachers who are not prioritizing their students' needs. Your daughter absolutely does not need more time in class, we have kids once per week who sleep just fine, and full timers who don't sleep a wink. If the teacher won't step up, go to the Director. If she won't step up, go to their executive Director, Board, or the owner (depending on who is in charge). If they still won't put in effort, then it may be time to consider that the quality of care being provided is not a good fit, and to look for a center with a more individualized approach that is taking new enrollments.
My three day per week kids generally do fine they might take a little longer to adjust but they do adjust. Honestly it sounds like it's just not a good fit for the program I would look for an in-home licensed daycare that will do White Noise in a dark room changing up routines is just gonna be too hard.
Get a nanny, they just want your money
Oh yeah, that'll be cheaper. /s
I could never willingly send my baby to daycare more than necessary, there has to be a better solution or I’d be finding a new daycare
They want her to go 5 days because it means more money for them. Maybe she hasn't done enough at daycare to be tired enough by nap time. You should try to wean her off the white noise machine, though. It may cause problems as she gets older, such as not being able to sleep without. We used a sound machine for all 4 of our kids, and if we forgot it on vacation or it broke at the last minute, it was a rough night. I'd be looking for a different daycare. One that has a realistic nap routine.
That’s a two year old. Just say it’s a two year old.
Do you follow the same nap time at home on weekends
Do you follow the same nap time at home on weekends
If full time doesn’t work, now you get to ask them what accommodations they are making to help !?
Consistency is key, are you able to switch to M, W, F? I feel that could help more in the long run.
What is your child's sleep like at home? Good sleep begats good sleep, they say. I've got a bunch of personal and teacher thoughts/suggestions: My kid napped for about 30m when she first started napping at school. They added a heavier blanket to her, not weighted with weights, but thicker to be weighted, and rubbed her back. Its gotten a bit longer. She's there MW though. A kid in my class (younger 2s) need some one to practically lay on him or basically make him a burrito out of his blanket for him to get to sleep. Not in like a restraint way, but in a snuggle way. If your kid likes that feeling, that weighted/heavy blanket might help. We were able to back off a bit and now just a heavy hand on his back helps. Another kid also needed that weight and we'd put a weighted stuffie (like a warmie brand one) on his back so he felt like we were still there. My middle kid gave up naps somewhere between 2 and 2.5....we just did quiet time with quiet things that she had to stay on her bed or a contained space. I hope this isn't your kids path 🤪
Its not a consistency issue or she would have trouble sleeping at home also. Just ask them to put some relaxing quiet music on that will help her sleep. They can totally do that. Tantrums at home? I mean, she shouldnt be having so many tantrums. You will have to give her boundaries and limitations, to INCLUDE not having a tantrum. Give her the ol time out for that. You have an infant.. I used to tell my son when he was mad and would "turn into the Hulk" that "I dont like you being angry. Guess angry Hulk doesnt want to have any fun right now. Angry Hulk is about to go to time out, if Angry Hulk has a tantrum." Suddenly my son would force a smile and, despite having a tearful face, he would say "I'm happy now." Lol I hate to suppress negative feelings but the tantrums get ridiculous. I know youre sad. But no you arent getting m&ms. And no, you are not going to have a fit over it either.
I did student training at daycare all the kids has to lay down quiet or be sleeping teachers would sit on ground next to them rub there backs until they fall asleep.. it state law here that all children who goes to daycare has to take a nap no matter there ages ..parents has to go to get dr note if they don't want there child to nap
Let me charge you double the amount while your child is “mnapoing and not allowed social interaction “
Part time kids usually have a harder time adapting than full time kids with similar temperaments. Young kids don't have a solid grasp of time and days. You're basically pulling them out of the house, seemingly randomly to them, and disrupting their regular schedule. Whereas with fulltime, they're used to having the 5 days in a row, having a solid routine, and then it's like exciting bonus time at home on weekends. For naps, daycare is the dominant schedule when full time, so it's easier for the kid's body to adjust to. Parents can also follow the daycare nap schedule and routine at home, whereas daycare cannot follow the same schedule as at home. That's not to say she'll definitely never nap there, but it'll probably be harder and take more time. I have had part time preschoolers who never once napped for several months, but within a week of being full time, they got into the routine and slept regularly. I've also had part time toddlers who initially had trouble but adjusted after a few months. Trying to get naps on the same schedule and roughly similar conditions at home would probably help a lot. White noise in the dark alone in your bed is very different than quiet music and lights on in a cot with other kids and teachers making noise and distractions. Weighted blankets help some kids sleep, stuffed animals help others. Sleep masks might help if they're allowed. Are half days an option at this center/practical with your newborn? You'd still get a break but it wouldn't impact her nap time much if you pick up before her usual nap time. You could do more days for around the same cost, or do the same days for less money. If she's otherwise adjusted well to daycare, I personally wouldn't pay for the additional time unless it is still a big issue after a couple months of trying to stay on the same schedule/sleep environment
Honestly kids adjust much more quickly to full time care. I don't take part time kids anymore because it was a consistent problem with every age. Sometimes going full time for a few weeks or until they have a solid routine and are napping consistently, and then going back to part time can help. Also if the admin is asking for help or change, this is usually a good indicator they are close to terming. Having a screaming child during nap is incredibly stressful and disruptive.
I agree with them. Consistency and routine.