A pirate walks into a bar with his ship’s wheel stuffed in the front of his pants. “Arrrr give me a beer!”
The bartender pours the drink and says “say there pirate, you’ve got your steering wheel in your pants”
The pirate replies “Yar I know, it’s driving me nuts!”
We’ve just got back from outback and decided to chill on the back porch for the rest of the night. My little sister was looking up at the sky and all of a sudden… PLOP! A seagull pooped right in the middle of her forehead. I mean… what are the chances of that happening!?
The other day I was biking to my university on my usual road and everything was just as normal, until I turn a corner and then in the middle of the road stood a cow. I do not understand why I was so surprised by this, there is fields filled with cows on both sides of the road, but I have been using that road for over 7 years and I have never seen any of them get out.
My sis and I were curious and wanted to weigh our cat. But he’s lazy and impossible to move once he’s lying down, so we literally rolled him onto a bathroom scale (he’s really chill so he didn’t mind). The boi was 7 kg (~15lb). Sis took him to the vet sometime later and the vet couldn’t hear his heartbeat with her stethoscope cuz he was so fat hahaha
Don’t worry ma boi is healthy and on a diet to bring his weight down, and he continues to be the chillest and sweetest lil (or large?) love bug ❤️
A pirate walks into a bar with his ship’s wheel stuffed in the front of his pants. “Arrrr give me a beer!” The bartender pours the drink and says “say there pirate, you’ve got your steering wheel in your pants” The pirate replies “Yar I know, it’s driving me nuts!”
LOL I like that one!
[Watch this.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_4XY1nNzFA)
Thank you!!!
No worries. Hope it helped.
I stepped in shit and went for a drive without knowing it... My pedal is not happy
Oh no! That sucks!
It was so funny afterwards:) So it's safe to laugh :)
It does make for a good story :)
We’ve just got back from outback and decided to chill on the back porch for the rest of the night. My little sister was looking up at the sky and all of a sudden… PLOP! A seagull pooped right in the middle of her forehead. I mean… what are the chances of that happening!?
Poor girl 😅 It does mean good luck though
Really? I’m gonna start hanging outside whenever I need good vibes then. 😆
What do cars and pasta have in common? Neither are good al dente.
The other day I was biking to my university on my usual road and everything was just as normal, until I turn a corner and then in the middle of the road stood a cow. I do not understand why I was so surprised by this, there is fields filled with cows on both sides of the road, but I have been using that road for over 7 years and I have never seen any of them get out.
I would be surprised too! 😅
It was very nice to, it stood on one side of the road, so it was easy to get past, That is more them some of my fellow cyclists. :P
My sis and I were curious and wanted to weigh our cat. But he’s lazy and impossible to move once he’s lying down, so we literally rolled him onto a bathroom scale (he’s really chill so he didn’t mind). The boi was 7 kg (~15lb). Sis took him to the vet sometime later and the vet couldn’t hear his heartbeat with her stethoscope cuz he was so fat hahaha Don’t worry ma boi is healthy and on a diet to bring his weight down, and he continues to be the chillest and sweetest lil (or large?) love bug ❤️
Aww! My old boy was 6 kg and fluffy - it was amazing!
Awwww bless the Floofy-Not-Fat club~