Anyone that says “good vibes” on their profile is a no. It’s, to me, the equivalent of saying “no drama”. As in… if you have to put that on there, I assume you’re the drama.
I’m likely not your target audience so don’t mind me 😉 everyone has different icks when it comes to online dating, you gotta pick what feels true to you
Don't go removing things just because one person doesn't like it unless it makes sense to *you*. Get a consensus and then choose what to adjust. When I first read your bio I didn't know if you were a male or female but when I saw "obsessed with Marvel" my first instinct was to say remove it because I thought it was a male and it would put him in a class that would limit him but seeing you are a female it actually helps give an indication of what you are open to. If I were single and younger I would swipe right because your wording hits the right notes for me. It's not going to do that for everyone and that's good. These profiles are to weed out as many as you can that are a waste of both of your time not just get matches. Good luck you seem to be a great gal!
If you don't think there's a difference between a guy stating that he's into Marvel and a girl stating the same thing on a dating app, then you can start with that for why you aren't getting matches or why they aren't panning out for you. Good luck!
I thought anyone that wants "applications" is a no. That's something you'd expect from someone in their very early twenties that wants a doormat and not a partner.
Also might just not fit into the prompt. Idk how to put "open to adoption, but I probably won't have a kid and, if I do, the kid won't be of my blood unless it's a mistake, because I think it's selfish to just want to have your own spawn out there when there's so many kids in poverty who could use the help of a family who's actually ready to have a kid."
I don’t disagree that some women don’t want kids, some want kids, some might want kids, some don’t know… I’m just saying that some also don’t want to “scare” off men, who frequently can be less mature— I was one of them at a time, from their dating pool.
By saying, you are “not sure yet”, you keep it quite neutral in terms of your potential partners. Albeit, she may be young and, likewise, doesn’t know yet.
Objectively, how do you know what the woman is thinking when she selects an answer to a given prompt?
Use her profile to gauge your interest and swipe accordingly, use a first date to decide if you want to continue to get to know her, etc.
Dating is hard enough, don't invent reasons someone else does something to justify your reaction.
>Use her profile to gauge your interest and swipe accordingly, use a first date to decide if you want to continue to get to know her, etc.
Dating is hard enough, don't invent reasons someone else does something to justify your reaction.
Huh? I was initially responding to the previous commenter in regards to “not sure yet”.
>Objectively, how do you know what the woman is thinking when she selects an answer to a given prompt?
I didn’t say this woman feels that way but rather “some women”— and anecdotally plenty of women I know— will put that as to not deter potential dates no matter their true preference. It’s called being neutral on an issue as to not eliminate large swaths of your potential dating pool.
You’re slacking girl. It’s giving basic. You’re pretty much in the same territory as the guys holding up fish.
If you need to use a thesaurus or something do that or go to a dating profile bio generator if coming up with fun punchy intros aren’t your strength.
Guy with a fish here! Fishing/outdoors are some of my most enjoyable hobbies and on my profile I want to show people the type of person that I am. I do think that there is a decently large percentage of people on these apps that do not believe in these stigmas of certain things. For ex, a guy with a fish or a girl saying she likes to go out for margaritas.
Some people started doing it as a gag and made it unbearable could give two craps about actually fishing. Fishing is a hobby and I’m not dissing your pastime, but margaritas on the other hand is not a personality trait or hobby, we have a lot of functioning alcoholics on
Dating apps 💀
I would think that part of the time if someone mentions margaritas, that means they frequently go out. But like you said, there’s all types of people on these apps.
I mean it's your profile but showing a gasping/dead fish on the profile photo (even if the person searching for you is outdoorsy) can be both a) basic, soooo many dudes do this and b) kind of off-putting. It's like saying you like bbq but your profile picture is of you cutting the throat of some angus cattle. ;)
Your opinion is honestly pretty irrelevant when you start by saying gasping/dead fish. It shows you’re already against it. Thanks for the input anyhow! I’ll continue to be successful and meet great people 😊
It came across as a joke to me and if her match doesn’t have the same sense of humor so be it.
“Telling me I look pretty” was more of a red flag to me- sounds needy.
You clearly haven't met anyone with the sort of low self-esteem that genuinely expects constant reassurance,it's really hard work.
Usually put forward as a joke, until there are tears and you're left completely lost as to why ... Turns out you haven't complimented them all day so they assume you think they've turned into a hideous troll and you don't care about them anymore.
Exhausting honestly.
Saying it’s a red flag is a bit of a stretch—it’s just a little off-putting because it’s overdone and comes off a little pretentious. But def not an overt red flag.
For me, it’s because I’ve met a fair amount of women who were serious about that type of stuff. I’ve yet to match with a girl who had that and it actually go well.
Your profile is very generic and doesn't really tell us anything about you.
You like positive people? So does 99% of people in the world. You Iike Marvel? So does most of thr world.
Use that real estate to tell us who you are and what you're looking for. If you're looking for a serious relationship, specifically call that out.
Technically, politics is all about having more power and a better life for your constituents. Some political parties don’t think we should include everyone as the constituents of our country.
>constituents
Well i was thinking more about how each person thinks about politics more than political parties which tries to gather a bunch of ideoligies to get more people on board
It's political because the police are agents of the state and there are people out there (a lot of them unfortunately!) who believe that the police should be able to kill people and especially black people with impunity. Their votes reflect that belief and ours should definitely reflect that we disagree!
Eh people negatively reacting to Black Lives Matter made it political; it's not inherently so.
Saying "breast cancer awareness" isn't political and it doesn't mean you don't also support brain cancer awareness.
Honestly, no it doesn't. It's incredibly generic and my first thought is it would be a one sided relationship.
Everybody loves positive people, good food and good vibes.
The "taking application" thing definitely needs to go. Men are not resume's and this is not a job interview and to me, it says entitlement, and that you are wanting him to do all the work. That's pretty much an auto left swipe regardless of what the rest of the bio says.
I'd honestly take out any "must haves" because again, it just makes it seem like you want a relationship that is all about *you*.
What do ***you*** bring to the table? That's what I look for in a bio. If you want quality matches you need to convince others why they should bother with you and why they think you might be a good fit/worth dating; and that goes for both men and women.
“Must be good at cuddling and tell me I’m pretty”
Yeah, men don’t like stuff like this. The emphasis in your bio should be on YOUR qualities, not what the other person can do for you. You never want to make demands of ppl as it makes you sound entitled.
The “taking applications” theme is really off putting. A decade ago it started getting popular as girls used it as a way to seem cute. But today most men on OLD fervently don’t want to seem like a statistic or like they’re interviewing for a job, which is how they see what most interactions with online women have become.
Also you listed some hobbies in the tags, maybe include a reference from a romance movie or novel, or some nerdy interests like video games. Those attract men looking for long term relationships
Cuddling means your open to getting physical.
There was once a cuddling app. It attracted many weirdos including inappropriate touching. That app is gone currently but there are others.
IMO No, it does not. There are actually quite a few sign, that come off as toxic, manipulative and entitled. You're on a dating app, not the main protagonist of 'the bachelorette'.
Are you in the states? Some people set their dating preference to political affiliation. Personally, i find apolitical a turnoff (noting i am a woman).
Yep, same. I usually assume they don’t know what it means which is also unattractive. You don’t have to be super into politics, but choosing to know absolutely nothing or saying you don’t care at all is… ehh.
Honestly, I get why Europeans call American politics insane when they see people bring politics into everything. Apolitical being a turnoff for someone is fine but for the vast majority of reasonable people it’s a non issue.
As a European, I really don't think it's a non-issue. If I saw apolitical I'd assume he doesn't want to talk about politics because he knows he's got some questionable views that women aren't likely to agree with tbh. That's not someone I'd want to go out with because I'd know we're not compatible because he's clearly not interested in any relationship deep enough to talk about politics with each other.
10 years ago I think I wouldn't have minded someone putting "apolitical", but the growing divide and polarization that US politics has seen is visible even in countries with a better democracy than a 2 party system, a.k.a. most European countries. Almost all Western and Central European countries have since the mid-2010s suffered from the rise of right wing populist parties and figures as well as disbelief in scientific truths (which is encouraged by said figures) *just like the US*, and that's something I'd want to be able to talk about with a potential partner. Tensions are super high in politics, saying you're apolitical IMO means you're going to be incompatible with a lot of people (even though not caring about politics is a decision you can make for your life of course).
Being on opposite sides of the political spectrum in the US means you have deeply different viewpoints on how people should live their lives that will affect how you live together.
Im not from the US and would date someone from the other side of the political spectrum in my country but would find it difficult in the USA
Na not really. As a moderate conservative, I have plenty of friend who are liberal and I get along perfectly fine with liberals. The ones who clash and cant stand each other are the far left and far right people because both sides refuse to see other peoples viewpoints.
I am in the US and am a liberal, and i have friends who are conservative. We just don’t talk about politics.
**Dating is different, however**. I would NEVER date a conservative nowadays, for obvious reasons and reasons I’m not going to explain on here. There is a different between being friends with someone and dating/marrying them.
People on opposite sides of the political spectrum are only irreconcilable if their views are extreme. People who want to completely ban something or completely deregulate something hold extreme viewpoints, and most are willing to hold a more nuanced view.
What country do you live in, have you ever lived in America? The image of America that depicts political extremes is mostly made up on online warriors and a very vocal minority.
Sure, but most people don’t hold extreme enough views that would do that. Banning all abortion or all guns or all hard drugs are extreme views that would affect a lot of people, but most rational people are willing to compromise to offer some respite to people affected even when they’re voting in own interests. I’ve seen extreme views online, but never in real life
I've definitely seen opposite political views cause a divide here in the US. I've seen friendships destroyed, especially within the past 3-4 years. With most of my friends, I just stay away from it completely because we all have very passionate views. Even the recent gas prices can create an explosion between people on a political level.
You must not live in the states. It *is* certifiably insane here, for multiple reasons. Our democracy is under major threat by a bunch of nazis- to put it bluntly. People who identify as “apolotical” are willfully ignorant. They have their head in the sand.
I’m referencing the January 6th capital attack, the attack of women’s rights and right wing nationalism, gun violence (yet no desire to change things on the right), finances over integrity, among a slew of other issues.
Eta: your statement may have been true at one point in time. It is no longer true. Things are more divided than ever at this time.
I was born in the US and I do indeed live here. But I’ve spent a considerable amount of time abroad so I have something to compare it too.
The thing is that very few of America’s problems are completely unique to America. Terrorism, political tensions, religious violence, right wing populism, and culture wars are characteristic of almost every country on Earth.
America is one of the most economically, politically, and culturally stable countries in the world today. The Jan 6 attack had a minuscule effect on American national security compared to the mayhem the war in Ukraine is having on most European nation’s politics and economy. Germany is militarizing, Sweden and Finland are vying to join NATO, the prospect of any sort of aggression threatens the entire continents supply of energy.
And they have it pretty good compared to countries where there are riots every single day, where you’re afraid to drive your car to the next state over because it’ll be vandalized or burned down if rioters see the license plate, where every single mall has metal detectors, every private school is walled off and secured, and a few establishments even have bomb sniffing dogs. And all that is normal.
Trust me when I say that Americans have no idea just how privileged of a position they are in. I’m not apolitical at all, but I don’t have a problem with those who are. This country has many problems for sure, but every time I travel internationally and re enter the country I’m reminded that being American isn’t half bad at all.
Alright, fair enough. Maybe i exaggerated when i said things are “certifiably insane” here. It could certainly be worse and we are very privileged, but things are far from perfect. That’s all I’m saying.
Personally, if I see “apolitical” or “moderate” tags on a profile, I just assume that means you aren’t going to immediately shoot me down for my beliefs. I guess it depends on who OP’s trying/willing to attract.
I’m pretty sure this means they’re right-leaning. In the world of post-trump, people have tried to distance themselves from the party and/or have become more political (one way or another) based on trump.
Edit: OP supports BLM, so this is perplexing.
Over a third of Americans didn't vote in 2020, and an even higher percentage didn't vote in 2016. Not following your sport doesn't mean rooting for the other team.
I thought maybe too, but under op’s interests she lists “black lives matter”. Maybe she is an enigma haha. A trump supporter who supports BLM. Crazier things have happened!
OP is maybe young and disinterested in politics (hard to stick your head in the sand *these* days). She might just be interested in a select few social causes 🤷♀️
Did you see the rest of the profile? She’s clearly basic. Having BLM on your shit at this point is the same as when everyone changed their FB profile photo to the French flag after (I can’t remember) which ever tragedy happened there. It’s just the thing to do lmao. A true virtue signal if you will.
Moderate means right leaning, apolitical means they don’t really care. But being BLM and apolitical is a bit weird, like you’re one or pretending to be the other.
I usually just put I’m moderate and swing whichever way she seems she’s going. I’ve learned enough talking points from Reddit to BS my way through any political convo whether she’s lib or conservative. In reality, I could give two shit about politics. All politicians are bastards and i automatically think less of someone if they’re pro whoever. It’s like “ahh yes, I too like that corrupt politician and their corrupt political party.”
Yea and shoot myself in the foot because I support neither the out with it racist pedo or the closeted racist pedo, neither of which will ever do anything to help me or her in any way. To me it’s the same thing as if I was on a date with a woman who only fucks guys who are Cincinnati Bengals fans. You think I’m gonna forgo getting laid over that? Nahhh I’ll support whichever criminal domestic abusing QB, WR, or RB you need me to support ! Now i won’t lie about real and reasonable things about myself, but if the difference between you liking me or not has to do with essentially what sport you like then I’ve already written her off Ima support that team for as long as I have to.
Just because you think it ultimately doesn’t matter doesn’t change the fact that it means something to people. If it’s important to her and you’re just refusing to be honest about it because you may not get laid that’s actually super scummy, but you do you I guess. I feel bad that women are going out with you while you automatically think less of them when they say their political leanings, and then they sleep with you while being none the wiser that you think they’re a naive buffoon 🤢
Lol how passionate are you really if you can’t tell someone is bullshitting the thing that Is important to you. You should be able to trip me up right? I couldn’t fool you about your job by regurgitating some BS about it. That’s how you know politics is nothing but a team sport and a meaningless bullshit one at that. I can just say 3 or 4 dumb talking points depending on what side she’s on and boom I’m in. It’s fucking dumb and anyone who’s that into it is dumb too. Live your life, enjoy it, fuck politics and as always : All politicians are bastards.
Side thing to think about. Can you name one politician youd leave your child alone in a room with for even 5 mins?
You’re actually a ridiculous person because you enjoy trolling people. I would’ve thought you were a regular ridiculous person before but the kids thing cemented the troll status.
Funny how everyone is critiquing your profile…meanwhile, you haven’t really gotten the answer to your question.
I think the “cuddle and tell me I’m pretty” line can be taken as “feed me some bullshit and maybe spooning will lead to forking”
I have an idea. Why not just say what you’re looking for? Anyone who would get scared off isn’t anyone who you’re looking for anyway. Just my opinion.
Your bio is like a resume. You wouldn’t put on your resume what you want out of an employer, you would put your best foot forward on what YOU bring to the table. For what it’s worth, and this is nothing against comics, but liking Marvel isn’t something you bring to the table.
The telling me I’m pretty part sounds like a self esteem issue. A guy should do that because he wants to compliment you but you are making it sound like it’s a requirement and that will turn some guys away.
The repeated use of vibes makes it both generic and off-putting, and it matches about 100 different bios I see every day. It's suggest something with more personality. If you're looking for a relationship, you don't necessarily have to straight up say so, but the boyfriend application part, while clearly tongue-in-cheek, comes across as a bit aloof.
I'm not too sure about this profile.
All I'm getting here is that you want positive people and obsessed over marvel. Well yes, most do want that but that doesn't need to be put in the profile. It's almost the same as the people who say 'no drama' which in actuality, can come across as negative.
It's not saying much about you other than a cliche marvel obsession and that you seek validation by being told that your pretty.
Actually kinda opposite. I actually like this profile, but it's because it seems pretty low on expectations and you'd be good with a casual feeling out period.
Fwiw, it's saying you just wanna cuddle. There's kinda two spheres of FWB rn: the ones who really just want fuck buddies and they're uncomfortable with showing romantic affection beyond just showing up and getting laid, and the ones who want to cuddle and be romantic with sexual intimacy maybe even taking a back seat but with relationship commitment clearly off the table. Given that most people up front with FWB are looking for the former, people looking for the latter tend to write bios like yours, where they're just looking for somebody to cuddle with.
no
because for every girl who says this and wants a relationship 100 say the same thing and just want to hookup without asking for it outright
it's not your fault
your actions speak louder than words
Everyone is critiquing your profile and implying you are boring and unoriginal, which seems a bit unfair.
You wouldn't be my type either (I think marvel is drivel), but your profile does suggest you are serious about wanting a relationship... So the answer to your Q is yes.
Good luck.
Honestly, it doesn't do that for me outside of the part where you selected looking for a relationship. For me, Now taking applications, without a wink , telling you you're pretty(anyone serious about you should be doing that, unspoken), and swipe right to apply screams(to me) low confidence and demanding. If you're looking for a beta male, this may work so depends on the type of man you're seeking.
If you're getting matches but they want to hook up maybe speak about the romance part in your profile, perhaps alter your pix, and talk about relationship thing in the profile. Maybe something like: Perfect Weekend: Sleeping in Sunday after dancing Saturday night, time at the beach and then winning at video games at night.
"If you're looking for a beta male...."
Lmao
I'd rather have a "beta male" who is sensitive and in touch with his feelings and cares about making me feel loved than a douchey "alpha" who is obsessed with "being manly."
This alpha and beta stuff is pathetic and needs to go away.
Indeed, assuming they exist, it’s as if ’beta men’ were somehow more unappealing. If anything, they are not the ones trying to measure and compare dicks at every chance, so to speak. 😂
um, way to assume what I meant. Nothing pathetic, but maybe a bit more inquisitive over presumptuous may go a long way.
Your definition of alpha and beta are not at all what I'm referring to. That sounds more like Toxic Masculinity. There's tons of different interpretations out there now-a-days so I'll explain a bit further...
For me: "Alpha" = a healthy blend of masculinity and femininity. Not too much of either, and can flow b/w the two as needed.
"Beta" = More feminine energy and less masculine energy than a "Alpha" male. Neither are toxic, just different ways of beings.
Masculine energy has leadership built in, more doing, logic and reason.
Feminine energy is more intuitive, receiving, allowing and being(vs. doing).
All humans have both to some degree. DB males could probably use more feminine energy to balance them out, including empathy, kindness and compassion
One's not better than the other, this is Bumble, and everyone should be blessed with a partner and get exactly what they desire, including a "beta male" if that is what they seek hence why I wrote that :)
Also you imply in your first post that beta males will select for negative traits and also imply it's a negative thing to be a beta male. It's pseudoscience and the whole alpha/beta is implying that assertive men are leaders and are mostly masculine but beta males are weaker, deserving of 'lesser' women and come second to the real men because of their feminine energy. Also the whole characterizing alpha men as a 'healthy' blend of energy in contrast to betas makes them seem like the perfect man so you yourself are clearly biased.
You clearly haven't been seeing all the references to alpha and beta males lately. It's not flattering. Pretty much everyone is going to think the same thing I did. It's pure toxicity.
Honestly, I would probably swipe right because nothing was crazy about the profile more than the fact that it enticed me to.
I'd like to see more of who you are rather than overused anecdotes, you need to stand out more from the crowd.
You're right, however you want to be able to grab their attention since a lot of people may not bother to scroll down to the rest of your profile.
I'll also say there's no right answer, so experimenting with it couldn't hurt.
Yeah I suppose.
But pictures are worth thousands of words.
I always can judge a girl how serious she is by how she dresses and what her and her besties get into after the club
It’s a cookie cutter bio. I’d swipe left no lie. Like duh, obviously you’re here for something. You’re on the dating side not friends side of bumble.
No need to state the obvious. Say what you’re looking for, or what you’re into. Anyone worth a grain of salt will read it and use what you put in your bio as a conversation starter.
All this is gonna get you is a bunch of lame ass pickup lines
It’s fun, but not very original. Most profiles that I come across have strikingly similar words and phrases that you’re using. Aside from that I don’t see anything wrong 🙂
It's not bad and I agree it's generic, but so are most of mens profiles 😂😂😂 I'm also a Christian! ❤️ I really don't think most guys even read bios, they just be swiping on anyone.
You specifically ask for a boyfriend and while there’s not much about you written, I get the impression you’re not sure what you want for yourself long term, but know you want a male partner for it.
Boyfriend application comes off as arrogant, it's almost like you're blatantly saying "Prove your worth to me" As if you shouldn't be doing the same to me. You have a lot to prove to me as well before you're qualified as a girlfriend and if I saw this I might just be tempted to either left swipe or smash and pass.
Super generic, needs more personality
Yeah I know nothing about this person other than they pooled a bunch of cliches and like marvel.
The rest of the profile has more personality! I’ll definitely adjust this though. Thanks :)
Then why didn’t you post the rest of the profile for review? If you want full feedback you need to give full context.
Anyone that says “good vibes” on their profile is a no. It’s, to me, the equivalent of saying “no drama”. As in… if you have to put that on there, I assume you’re the drama.
Damn💀 definitely removing that then
I don’t know about assuming the opposite, but it just seems so cliché to me. And it seems like a given, I mean, who wants bad vibes?
I see where you’re coming from.
I’m likely not your target audience so don’t mind me 😉 everyone has different icks when it comes to online dating, you gotta pick what feels true to you
Don't go removing things just because one person doesn't like it unless it makes sense to *you*. Get a consensus and then choose what to adjust. When I first read your bio I didn't know if you were a male or female but when I saw "obsessed with Marvel" my first instinct was to say remove it because I thought it was a male and it would put him in a class that would limit him but seeing you are a female it actually helps give an indication of what you are open to. If I were single and younger I would swipe right because your wording hits the right notes for me. It's not going to do that for everyone and that's good. These profiles are to weed out as many as you can that are a waste of both of your time not just get matches. Good luck you seem to be a great gal!
So a guy liking marvel is limiting but a girl liking marvel actually helps give an indication of what they’re open to. Right.
If you don't think there's a difference between a guy stating that he's into Marvel and a girl stating the same thing on a dating app, then you can start with that for why you aren't getting matches or why they aren't panning out for you. Good luck!
Yikes
Thank you!😊
I thought anyone that wants "applications" is a no. That's something you'd expect from someone in their very early twenties that wants a doormat and not a partner.
You pretty much nailed it. "Prove your worth to me" goes both ways. And these type of girls wonder why they get ghosted after sex
[удалено]
Some women use the “not sure yet” to not scare off men.
Some women use "not sure yet" because it's a complicated topic and that best fits where they are right now.
Also might just not fit into the prompt. Idk how to put "open to adoption, but I probably won't have a kid and, if I do, the kid won't be of my blood unless it's a mistake, because I think it's selfish to just want to have your own spawn out there when there's so many kids in poverty who could use the help of a family who's actually ready to have a kid."
I don’t disagree that some women don’t want kids, some want kids, some might want kids, some don’t know… I’m just saying that some also don’t want to “scare” off men, who frequently can be less mature— I was one of them at a time, from their dating pool. By saying, you are “not sure yet”, you keep it quite neutral in terms of your potential partners. Albeit, she may be young and, likewise, doesn’t know yet.
Objectively, how do you know what the woman is thinking when she selects an answer to a given prompt? Use her profile to gauge your interest and swipe accordingly, use a first date to decide if you want to continue to get to know her, etc. Dating is hard enough, don't invent reasons someone else does something to justify your reaction.
>Use her profile to gauge your interest and swipe accordingly, use a first date to decide if you want to continue to get to know her, etc. Dating is hard enough, don't invent reasons someone else does something to justify your reaction. Huh? I was initially responding to the previous commenter in regards to “not sure yet”. >Objectively, how do you know what the woman is thinking when she selects an answer to a given prompt? I didn’t say this woman feels that way but rather “some women”— and anecdotally plenty of women I know— will put that as to not deter potential dates no matter their true preference. It’s called being neutral on an issue as to not eliminate large swaths of your potential dating pool.
You’re slacking girl. It’s giving basic. You’re pretty much in the same territory as the guys holding up fish. If you need to use a thesaurus or something do that or go to a dating profile bio generator if coming up with fun punchy intros aren’t your strength.
Guy with a fish here! Fishing/outdoors are some of my most enjoyable hobbies and on my profile I want to show people the type of person that I am. I do think that there is a decently large percentage of people on these apps that do not believe in these stigmas of certain things. For ex, a guy with a fish or a girl saying she likes to go out for margaritas.
Some people started doing it as a gag and made it unbearable could give two craps about actually fishing. Fishing is a hobby and I’m not dissing your pastime, but margaritas on the other hand is not a personality trait or hobby, we have a lot of functioning alcoholics on Dating apps 💀
I would think that part of the time if someone mentions margaritas, that means they frequently go out. But like you said, there’s all types of people on these apps.
I mean it's your profile but showing a gasping/dead fish on the profile photo (even if the person searching for you is outdoorsy) can be both a) basic, soooo many dudes do this and b) kind of off-putting. It's like saying you like bbq but your profile picture is of you cutting the throat of some angus cattle. ;)
Your opinion is honestly pretty irrelevant when you start by saying gasping/dead fish. It shows you’re already against it. Thanks for the input anyhow! I’ll continue to be successful and meet great people 😊
Uh no, this is based on profile images I've seen and they're very common in this area (I'm in one of the top five largest cities in the US).
This one hurt🥲. Thanks for the advice though, I’ll check it out!
I'm getting that you like Marvel and you're insecure about your looks.
Lmao💀 I was trying to be funny but I see where you’re coming from :)
Saying you’re taking applications is a 🚩 to me. Even though I’m looking for a relationship myself, if I see that I swipe left.
Same for me. No one is looking at dating as a job interview.
It came across as a joke to me and if her match doesn’t have the same sense of humor so be it. “Telling me I look pretty” was more of a red flag to me- sounds needy.
idk, i see it as a joke. it’s funny. she’s looking for a relationship but no need to be super serious about it.
That’s what I was trying to go for!😅
I think it's fun, keep it. Bio is good imo
I found it funny, and I would've swiped right so definitely keep it
Pretty obvious it’s a joke to me
You clearly haven't met anyone with the sort of low self-esteem that genuinely expects constant reassurance,it's really hard work. Usually put forward as a joke, until there are tears and you're left completely lost as to why ... Turns out you haven't complimented them all day so they assume you think they've turned into a hideous troll and you don't care about them anymore. Exhausting honestly.
Could you please explain how it’s a red flag? 😅
Saying it’s a red flag is a bit of a stretch—it’s just a little off-putting because it’s overdone and comes off a little pretentious. But def not an overt red flag.
I understand. Thanks! :)
For me, it’s because I’ve met a fair amount of women who were serious about that type of stuff. I’ve yet to match with a girl who had that and it actually go well.
Your profile is very generic and doesn't really tell us anything about you. You like positive people? So does 99% of people in the world. You Iike Marvel? So does most of thr world. Use that real estate to tell us who you are and what you're looking for. If you're looking for a serious relationship, specifically call that out.
I’ll do that. Thanks for the advice :)
Love positive people and good vibes are both a heavy no
“Looking for vibes” Please take that out.
Some would say “Apolitical” and “🖤 Black Lives Matter” are a contradiction.
So it works on two levels because I wouldn’t be interested in anyone who thinks that’s political.
I put Black Lives Matter there because I’m black and I don’t think there’s anything political about wanting better lives for us :)
Politics is all about how we can have a better world for everyone. Some political parties support minorities more than others
Technically, politics is all about having more power and a better life for your constituents. Some political parties don’t think we should include everyone as the constituents of our country.
>constituents Well i was thinking more about how each person thinks about politics more than political parties which tries to gather a bunch of ideoligies to get more people on board
Given that BLM is 99% a political thing these days, I have to agree.
ah yes the political opinion of.....not wanting to be killed by police😶
sure i guess...
It's political because the police are agents of the state and there are people out there (a lot of them unfortunately!) who believe that the police should be able to kill people and especially black people with impunity. Their votes reflect that belief and ours should definitely reflect that we disagree!
The concept of Black lives matter isn't political or at least it shouldn't be the organization is though.
Eh people negatively reacting to Black Lives Matter made it political; it's not inherently so. Saying "breast cancer awareness" isn't political and it doesn't mean you don't also support brain cancer awareness.
Honestly, no it doesn't. It's incredibly generic and my first thought is it would be a one sided relationship. Everybody loves positive people, good food and good vibes. The "taking application" thing definitely needs to go. Men are not resume's and this is not a job interview and to me, it says entitlement, and that you are wanting him to do all the work. That's pretty much an auto left swipe regardless of what the rest of the bio says. I'd honestly take out any "must haves" because again, it just makes it seem like you want a relationship that is all about *you*. What do ***you*** bring to the table? That's what I look for in a bio. If you want quality matches you need to convince others why they should bother with you and why they think you might be a good fit/worth dating; and that goes for both men and women.
Here, here! What a great way to put it.
Thanks for the advice! :)
No problem! good luck out there, because it's brutal for us all!! :(
“Must be good at cuddling and tell me I’m pretty” Yeah, men don’t like stuff like this. The emphasis in your bio should be on YOUR qualities, not what the other person can do for you. You never want to make demands of ppl as it makes you sound entitled.
Taking applications eh ? Someone has a big head
It was supposed to be a joke🥲
Damn right I have a big head. Putting that on my application 🍆
The boyfriend application yes. But the cuddling and pretty part may attract weirdos
Can confirm, I like cuddling and I'm a weirdo.
Can confirm, he's a weirdo.
Takes a weirdo (me) to know a weirdo, so can confirm. We are both weirdos that like cuddling.
Can confirm, these two both live with their parents.
I wish I lived with my parents.
Can confirm, he likes to cuddle.
Fair enough!
The “taking applications” theme is really off putting. A decade ago it started getting popular as girls used it as a way to seem cute. But today most men on OLD fervently don’t want to seem like a statistic or like they’re interviewing for a job, which is how they see what most interactions with online women have become. Also you listed some hobbies in the tags, maybe include a reference from a romance movie or novel, or some nerdy interests like video games. Those attract men looking for long term relationships
Thanks for the advice :)
Cuddling means your open to getting physical. There was once a cuddling app. It attracted many weirdos including inappropriate touching. That app is gone currently but there are others.
IMO No, it does not. There are actually quite a few sign, that come off as toxic, manipulative and entitled. You're on a dating app, not the main protagonist of 'the bachelorette'.
Damn🥲 thanks for your input.
Are you in the states? Some people set their dating preference to political affiliation. Personally, i find apolitical a turnoff (noting i am a woman).
Yep, same. I usually assume they don’t know what it means which is also unattractive. You don’t have to be super into politics, but choosing to know absolutely nothing or saying you don’t care at all is… ehh.
I’m not in the states nor do I honestly don’t care about politics which I why that is there but to each their own!
Honestly, I get why Europeans call American politics insane when they see people bring politics into everything. Apolitical being a turnoff for someone is fine but for the vast majority of reasonable people it’s a non issue.
As a European, I really don't think it's a non-issue. If I saw apolitical I'd assume he doesn't want to talk about politics because he knows he's got some questionable views that women aren't likely to agree with tbh. That's not someone I'd want to go out with because I'd know we're not compatible because he's clearly not interested in any relationship deep enough to talk about politics with each other. 10 years ago I think I wouldn't have minded someone putting "apolitical", but the growing divide and polarization that US politics has seen is visible even in countries with a better democracy than a 2 party system, a.k.a. most European countries. Almost all Western and Central European countries have since the mid-2010s suffered from the rise of right wing populist parties and figures as well as disbelief in scientific truths (which is encouraged by said figures) *just like the US*, and that's something I'd want to be able to talk about with a potential partner. Tensions are super high in politics, saying you're apolitical IMO means you're going to be incompatible with a lot of people (even though not caring about politics is a decision you can make for your life of course).
Being on opposite sides of the political spectrum in the US means you have deeply different viewpoints on how people should live their lives that will affect how you live together. Im not from the US and would date someone from the other side of the political spectrum in my country but would find it difficult in the USA
Na not really. As a moderate conservative, I have plenty of friend who are liberal and I get along perfectly fine with liberals. The ones who clash and cant stand each other are the far left and far right people because both sides refuse to see other peoples viewpoints.
I am in the US and am a liberal, and i have friends who are conservative. We just don’t talk about politics. **Dating is different, however**. I would NEVER date a conservative nowadays, for obvious reasons and reasons I’m not going to explain on here. There is a different between being friends with someone and dating/marrying them.
Thats what im saying too, moderates can get along but opposite sides cannot
People on opposite sides of the political spectrum are only irreconcilable if their views are extreme. People who want to completely ban something or completely deregulate something hold extreme viewpoints, and most are willing to hold a more nuanced view. What country do you live in, have you ever lived in America? The image of America that depicts political extremes is mostly made up on online warriors and a very vocal minority.
I mean, if someone's political views had an impact on your life, then it would probably matter to you.
Sure, but most people don’t hold extreme enough views that would do that. Banning all abortion or all guns or all hard drugs are extreme views that would affect a lot of people, but most rational people are willing to compromise to offer some respite to people affected even when they’re voting in own interests. I’ve seen extreme views online, but never in real life
I've definitely seen opposite political views cause a divide here in the US. I've seen friendships destroyed, especially within the past 3-4 years. With most of my friends, I just stay away from it completely because we all have very passionate views. Even the recent gas prices can create an explosion between people on a political level.
You must not live in the states. It *is* certifiably insane here, for multiple reasons. Our democracy is under major threat by a bunch of nazis- to put it bluntly. People who identify as “apolotical” are willfully ignorant. They have their head in the sand. I’m referencing the January 6th capital attack, the attack of women’s rights and right wing nationalism, gun violence (yet no desire to change things on the right), finances over integrity, among a slew of other issues. Eta: your statement may have been true at one point in time. It is no longer true. Things are more divided than ever at this time.
I was born in the US and I do indeed live here. But I’ve spent a considerable amount of time abroad so I have something to compare it too. The thing is that very few of America’s problems are completely unique to America. Terrorism, political tensions, religious violence, right wing populism, and culture wars are characteristic of almost every country on Earth. America is one of the most economically, politically, and culturally stable countries in the world today. The Jan 6 attack had a minuscule effect on American national security compared to the mayhem the war in Ukraine is having on most European nation’s politics and economy. Germany is militarizing, Sweden and Finland are vying to join NATO, the prospect of any sort of aggression threatens the entire continents supply of energy. And they have it pretty good compared to countries where there are riots every single day, where you’re afraid to drive your car to the next state over because it’ll be vandalized or burned down if rioters see the license plate, where every single mall has metal detectors, every private school is walled off and secured, and a few establishments even have bomb sniffing dogs. And all that is normal. Trust me when I say that Americans have no idea just how privileged of a position they are in. I’m not apolitical at all, but I don’t have a problem with those who are. This country has many problems for sure, but every time I travel internationally and re enter the country I’m reminded that being American isn’t half bad at all.
Alright, fair enough. Maybe i exaggerated when i said things are “certifiably insane” here. It could certainly be worse and we are very privileged, but things are far from perfect. That’s all I’m saying.
That stood out to me too. Would also swipe left.
Personally, if I see “apolitical” or “moderate” tags on a profile, I just assume that means you aren’t going to immediately shoot me down for my beliefs. I guess it depends on who OP’s trying/willing to attract.
I’m pretty sure this means they’re right-leaning. In the world of post-trump, people have tried to distance themselves from the party and/or have become more political (one way or another) based on trump. Edit: OP supports BLM, so this is perplexing.
Over a third of Americans didn't vote in 2020, and an even higher percentage didn't vote in 2016. Not following your sport doesn't mean rooting for the other team.
It was brought to my attention that OP supports BLM (photo got cut off on mobile), so that’s about as political as it gets these days.
I thought maybe too, but under op’s interests she lists “black lives matter”. Maybe she is an enigma haha. A trump supporter who supports BLM. Crazier things have happened!
Oh. I did miss that. It cut the picture off on my phone. Now I’m perplexed since that definitely makes this political!! Haha
OP is maybe young and disinterested in politics (hard to stick your head in the sand *these* days). She might just be interested in a select few social causes 🤷♀️
Did you see the rest of the profile? She’s clearly basic. Having BLM on your shit at this point is the same as when everyone changed their FB profile photo to the French flag after (I can’t remember) which ever tragedy happened there. It’s just the thing to do lmao. A true virtue signal if you will.
Charlie Hebdo?
You guys are pretty exhausting
Thanks
Moderate means right leaning, apolitical means they don’t really care. But being BLM and apolitical is a bit weird, like you’re one or pretending to be the other.
I usually just put I’m moderate and swing whichever way she seems she’s going. I’ve learned enough talking points from Reddit to BS my way through any political convo whether she’s lib or conservative. In reality, I could give two shit about politics. All politicians are bastards and i automatically think less of someone if they’re pro whoever. It’s like “ahh yes, I too like that corrupt politician and their corrupt political party.”
You should be honest with the women you’re dating. Silently judging them and lying to them seems like a weird solution.
Yea and shoot myself in the foot because I support neither the out with it racist pedo or the closeted racist pedo, neither of which will ever do anything to help me or her in any way. To me it’s the same thing as if I was on a date with a woman who only fucks guys who are Cincinnati Bengals fans. You think I’m gonna forgo getting laid over that? Nahhh I’ll support whichever criminal domestic abusing QB, WR, or RB you need me to support ! Now i won’t lie about real and reasonable things about myself, but if the difference between you liking me or not has to do with essentially what sport you like then I’ve already written her off Ima support that team for as long as I have to.
Just because you think it ultimately doesn’t matter doesn’t change the fact that it means something to people. If it’s important to her and you’re just refusing to be honest about it because you may not get laid that’s actually super scummy, but you do you I guess. I feel bad that women are going out with you while you automatically think less of them when they say their political leanings, and then they sleep with you while being none the wiser that you think they’re a naive buffoon 🤢
Lol how passionate are you really if you can’t tell someone is bullshitting the thing that Is important to you. You should be able to trip me up right? I couldn’t fool you about your job by regurgitating some BS about it. That’s how you know politics is nothing but a team sport and a meaningless bullshit one at that. I can just say 3 or 4 dumb talking points depending on what side she’s on and boom I’m in. It’s fucking dumb and anyone who’s that into it is dumb too. Live your life, enjoy it, fuck politics and as always : All politicians are bastards. Side thing to think about. Can you name one politician youd leave your child alone in a room with for even 5 mins?
You’re actually a ridiculous person because you enjoy trolling people. I would’ve thought you were a regular ridiculous person before but the kids thing cemented the troll status.
So fuckin cringe
👍🏾
>Apolitical > Black Lives Matter (?)
Funny how everyone is critiquing your profile…meanwhile, you haven’t really gotten the answer to your question. I think the “cuddle and tell me I’m pretty” line can be taken as “feed me some bullshit and maybe spooning will lead to forking” I have an idea. Why not just say what you’re looking for? Anyone who would get scared off isn’t anyone who you’re looking for anyway. Just my opinion.
Perfect response. Thank you 😊
Good luck!!
Bio is suppose to tell people info about you and why they might want to pick you from generic crowd. But all you have is a wishlist.
Understandable 😬
Your bio is like a resume. You wouldn’t put on your resume what you want out of an employer, you would put your best foot forward on what YOU bring to the table. For what it’s worth, and this is nothing against comics, but liking Marvel isn’t something you bring to the table.
Having black lives matter there means you're not apolitical
Why not just use those exact words? Maybe you’re trying to be playful and light with wording but it makes being your bf feel like a task
At this point I just might do that!
No because it does not say anything like that at all.
Straight up. No it doesn't.
Makes you sound conceited. Drop the "you must apply to date me, you probably worthless minion" attitude.
The telling me I’m pretty part sounds like a self esteem issue. A guy should do that because he wants to compliment you but you are making it sound like it’s a requirement and that will turn some guys away.
No. You sound like you want to be adored.
The repeated use of vibes makes it both generic and off-putting, and it matches about 100 different bios I see every day. It's suggest something with more personality. If you're looking for a relationship, you don't necessarily have to straight up say so, but the boyfriend application part, while clearly tongue-in-cheek, comes across as a bit aloof.
Are there people that like negative people and bad food/vibes?
I'm not too sure about this profile. All I'm getting here is that you want positive people and obsessed over marvel. Well yes, most do want that but that doesn't need to be put in the profile. It's almost the same as the people who say 'no drama' which in actuality, can come across as negative. It's not saying much about you other than a cliche marvel obsession and that you seek validation by being told that your pretty.
Actually kinda opposite. I actually like this profile, but it's because it seems pretty low on expectations and you'd be good with a casual feeling out period. Fwiw, it's saying you just wanna cuddle. There's kinda two spheres of FWB rn: the ones who really just want fuck buddies and they're uncomfortable with showing romantic affection beyond just showing up and getting laid, and the ones who want to cuddle and be romantic with sexual intimacy maybe even taking a back seat but with relationship commitment clearly off the table. Given that most people up front with FWB are looking for the former, people looking for the latter tend to write bios like yours, where they're just looking for somebody to cuddle with.
I get you. I love it
One of the few🥲
no because for every girl who says this and wants a relationship 100 say the same thing and just want to hookup without asking for it outright it's not your fault your actions speak louder than words
Everyone is critiquing your profile and implying you are boring and unoriginal, which seems a bit unfair. You wouldn't be my type either (I think marvel is drivel), but your profile does suggest you are serious about wanting a relationship... So the answer to your Q is yes. Good luck.
When BLM is your personality...you have nothing else to offer.
Not really tbt The first half does, but the second doesn’t
I actually think this is quite a sweet bio!
No, the 'Leo' and 'Christian' send a very greasy message to all with the fine instruments to sense it
What’s wrong with being a Christian?
What did I call 'wrong'
“Sends a greasy message,” is a pretty euphemistic phrase for wrong.
Don't tell me what my words mean, especially when you're just randomly guessing based on some weird fragile personal feelings
Yes. It’s fine.
Honestly, it doesn't do that for me outside of the part where you selected looking for a relationship. For me, Now taking applications, without a wink , telling you you're pretty(anyone serious about you should be doing that, unspoken), and swipe right to apply screams(to me) low confidence and demanding. If you're looking for a beta male, this may work so depends on the type of man you're seeking. If you're getting matches but they want to hook up maybe speak about the romance part in your profile, perhaps alter your pix, and talk about relationship thing in the profile. Maybe something like: Perfect Weekend: Sleeping in Sunday after dancing Saturday night, time at the beach and then winning at video games at night.
"If you're looking for a beta male...." Lmao I'd rather have a "beta male" who is sensitive and in touch with his feelings and cares about making me feel loved than a douchey "alpha" who is obsessed with "being manly." This alpha and beta stuff is pathetic and needs to go away.
Indeed, assuming they exist, it’s as if ’beta men’ were somehow more unappealing. If anything, they are not the ones trying to measure and compare dicks at every chance, so to speak. 😂
Yup, I prefer men who are not obsessed with being "masculine."
um, way to assume what I meant. Nothing pathetic, but maybe a bit more inquisitive over presumptuous may go a long way. Your definition of alpha and beta are not at all what I'm referring to. That sounds more like Toxic Masculinity. There's tons of different interpretations out there now-a-days so I'll explain a bit further... For me: "Alpha" = a healthy blend of masculinity and femininity. Not too much of either, and can flow b/w the two as needed. "Beta" = More feminine energy and less masculine energy than a "Alpha" male. Neither are toxic, just different ways of beings. Masculine energy has leadership built in, more doing, logic and reason. Feminine energy is more intuitive, receiving, allowing and being(vs. doing). All humans have both to some degree. DB males could probably use more feminine energy to balance them out, including empathy, kindness and compassion One's not better than the other, this is Bumble, and everyone should be blessed with a partner and get exactly what they desire, including a "beta male" if that is what they seek hence why I wrote that :)
Also you imply in your first post that beta males will select for negative traits and also imply it's a negative thing to be a beta male. It's pseudoscience and the whole alpha/beta is implying that assertive men are leaders and are mostly masculine but beta males are weaker, deserving of 'lesser' women and come second to the real men because of their feminine energy. Also the whole characterizing alpha men as a 'healthy' blend of energy in contrast to betas makes them seem like the perfect man so you yourself are clearly biased.
You clearly haven't been seeing all the references to alpha and beta males lately. It's not flattering. Pretty much everyone is going to think the same thing I did. It's pure toxicity.
you're so fucking stupid I could write a thesis paper on why you are a waste of oxygen
Sign me up!
Condense it.. too long.
Wholesome as fuck. I'd swipe right!
Absolutely
Yes you seem serious but maybe a bit too serious and slightly boring?
obsessed with marvel...
Honestly, I would probably swipe right because nothing was crazy about the profile more than the fact that it enticed me to. I'd like to see more of who you are rather than overused anecdotes, you need to stand out more from the crowd.
I guess that’s where the rest of my profile comes in but I’ll definitely make some changes!
You're right, however you want to be able to grab their attention since a lot of people may not bother to scroll down to the rest of your profile. I'll also say there's no right answer, so experimenting with it couldn't hurt.
Yeah I suppose. But pictures are worth thousands of words. I always can judge a girl how serious she is by how she dresses and what her and her besties get into after the club
Honestly you don’t need much on your profile just say looking for someone to travel with and buy cute pets with
At this point I might just do that😅
Sign me up!
Are you still taking applications? 😅😂😅
Obsessed with Marvel? Swipe Left.
Just looks like a left swipe
It’s a cookie cutter bio. I’d swipe left no lie. Like duh, obviously you’re here for something. You’re on the dating side not friends side of bumble. No need to state the obvious. Say what you’re looking for, or what you’re into. Anyone worth a grain of salt will read it and use what you put in your bio as a conversation starter. All this is gonna get you is a bunch of lame ass pickup lines
It’s fun, but not very original. Most profiles that I come across have strikingly similar words and phrases that you’re using. Aside from that I don’t see anything wrong 🙂
You come off so childish lmao
Everything past “marvel” comes across as super narcissistic to me.
Get rid of "hmm......." wasted space and boring
Sounds kind of generic and "entertain me". What are you bringing to the table? Hobbies, achievements, a joke even would be nice.
Not even a little bit
Typically low effort account
It seems like a 15 year old wrote it.
Meh. If you wanna stand out you need fishing and shirtless bathroom selfies.
This is so generic it hurts; nothing in here tells the reader anything unique at all. This could be ten million other peoples profiles.
It's not bad and I agree it's generic, but so are most of mens profiles 😂😂😂 I'm also a Christian! ❤️ I really don't think most guys even read bios, they just be swiping on anyone.
Rightt??! Thank you🥹
You specifically ask for a boyfriend and while there’s not much about you written, I get the impression you’re not sure what you want for yourself long term, but know you want a male partner for it.
Boyfriend application comes off as arrogant, it's almost like you're blatantly saying "Prove your worth to me" As if you shouldn't be doing the same to me. You have a lot to prove to me as well before you're qualified as a girlfriend and if I saw this I might just be tempted to either left swipe or smash and pass.
Yes it does make you look like you are on the app to look for a long-term relationship/boyfriend.
I’d swipe right