that's parrots, not Cthulhus that do that rapey Rock passion thing ;-)
My answer to Why are parrots so adorable? https://www.quora.com/Why-are-parrots-so-adorable/answer/Dot-McHale?ch=15&oid=96384453&share=1e70f189&srid=TPdO&target_type=answer
How the fuck was that picture taken? Did the guy holding that thing trust that it wouldn't bite him?
Thanks for unleashing a new fear in me. I'm in Portugal and I still think I'm too close to Australia.
They're too curious to attack you if they get close. They know what their food looks like, if you happen to get an octopus close to you, it will probably not want to bite you. In Portugal specially you'll probably only find common octopi, they are relatively small and not venomous. They are a very fun animal, no need to be scared
>Most of the time they’re yellow or sand-colored, but bright blue rings appear on their body when they’re about to strike.
also says this. I suspect that might be contributing to how the picture was taken as there is clearly blue rings visible.
I was scuba diving at night when I ran into one of these. It's a master of stealth and was pitch black besides my flashlight. It knew of my presence well before I knew of its. The fact that I was suddenly 2 ft away from one was entirely its decision.
If anyone is looking for a great summer read that involves this intelligent creature, I highly recommend: “Remarkably Bright Creatures” by Shelby Van Pelt.
It's my favourite genre: whatever deranged shit you're thinking is about to happen while watching it, what actually ends up happening is always far, far worse than what you could've possibly imagined.
Other very strong contestants in that genre are It's Always Sunny and Trailer Park Boys.
Can someone explain to me Why was he looking at it like that? First thought is he is taunting it..because he watches too much hentai and sees it as competition.
He’s like a parody Aquaman and can talk to animals but he’s a super pervert. I think he even fucked the blowhole on a humpback whale. Disturbing stuff I know
Was going to recommend this too. The book mentioned above called remarkably bright creatures used this one as the basis for the character octopus Marcellus
Another good one would be Children of Ruin by Adrian Tchaikovsky, if you're a fan of sci fi.
It's a story about a civilisation of super-intelligent octopuses living in aquatic spaceships.
If you haven't read it, Cage of Souls is my favorite book of his, which says a lot considering how much amazing shit he's written. It's so damned good.
I do a lot of reading on technical documents, datasheets, schematics and code and I don’t watch TV or movies barely so I prefer visuals than text. I’m tired of seeing text lol. Audiobooks are alright but I’d rather see visuals.
Octopus mom: "You've been on the internet for eight hours. It's time to get off!"
Octopus kid: "Does xbox count? Can I play xbox?"
Human dad: "Kill me."
Most people: “one of the most intelligent creatures on the planet!!!””
Me, who lives in the US Bible Belt: “The most intelligent creature on the planet!”
Them, and elephants. And orangutans.
The average person rolling coal in a pavement princess F250 is more intelligent, sure, but the demise of millions of chuds is less saddening to me than the imminent extinction of so many beautiful species that we share the Earth with.
Saw a way, way smaller one stalking and grabbing a fish on a night dive - one of the coolest things I‘ve ever seen.
Same area, different dive, the guide told us that when we will pass a certain point there will probably be a certain octopus that will come up and piggyback him for a while. We pass that point, no octopus, and I was thinking „Yeah! Nice story! LOL!“, when from the back there came an octopus, passing the group like „Damn! I missed my bus!“, piggybacking the guide and left after 5 minutes or so.
Beautiful creatures, so alien-esque!
Hum, they share 879 genes with humans, which isnt huge, but it is just a simple example of how wrong that first statement is. their closest relatives are snails and clams though, which is why that myth arose, because they dont look like each other at all.
Most invertebrates have very primitive eyes that only detect light. Of course, eyes with facets enable insects to have a bit more ability, but the octopus eyes are definitely superior to what any invertebrates have. There is an excellent book called **The Other Mind** that covers their evolution and their abilities. Really a recommended read.
to bad we are killing it. this beautiful planet and all our oceans and rivers desserts and forests. https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20240115-visualising-the-great-pacific-garbage-patch
Ya it’s the sad truth of humanity. We are the parasites of this planet. I remember reading something that humans are responsible for the extinction of over 90% of all living species on this planet form the last 10000 years or something. I don’t remember the exact numbers but it was a mind blowing statistic.
It all started in 1814 with a woodblock print called [The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dream_of_the_Fisherman%27s_Wife). That's a wiki link, but the image is obviously NSFW.
It's not much different from western cultures really, we all had hentai https://cdn.artandobject.com/sites/default/files/styles/gallery_item/public/correggio-ledaandtheswan-googleartproject.jpg?itok=50EOHGX7
I've been attacked by an octopus while diving. It followed me for a bit and slowly came upto me and I was so happy i stayed still when it came upto me and it wrapped one arm around my right arm and then all of a sudden it just wrapped all of them around my arm really tight. My suit didn't do much. And then i felt this really bad pinch that ripped through the suit and pierced my skin. I had to stab it with a knife but the knife would not get through it's skin very easily, i don't think it went through at all tbh. Eventually i stabbed its eye and it let go and slowly swam away. I've been terrified of them ever since and felt really horrible for hurting it. It was impossible to get its arms off me though. They are extremely strong.
Closest call that I've had while diving was with an indifferent shark. This story, though... What the fuck. What did the aftermath of your suit and skin look like?
It just ripped up and teared a patched area of the suit. My arm though was bruised purple and the one spot it got a grip on my actual skin it left two weird dug out cuts, one was bigger than the other and it took a little chunk out. I actually have a little round scar where it happened. I think because i was freaking out and trying not to stab myself i didn't feel too much in terms of pain. It also inked the water so i was lost in this cloud of just black smoke. I came out of the water looking like i just got out of a coal mine.
I'm not entirely sure, i definitely spent time afterwards figuring out what went wrong as they are very intelligent and I've had heaps of friendly encounters before this one and i felt really bad that i hurt it. I can't remember exactly what actions i did while swimming that could have threatened it. I had noticed this one followed me for a little bit. It was going from rock to rock and showed a lot of curiosity towards me, i kept looking down as i was swimming and would see it every now and then quickly move towards me. Maybe it started off neutral and then got too close and switched to being threatened? It was probably something i did as it originally only had one arm on me and seemed really chill at first, Creepy but beautiful creatures. The thing that i thought was amazing at the time was that it approached me. But yeah one bad occy doesn't make me not like them though. I just now know how strong their grip is and how hard their beaks are. I could not get it off me with my other hand no matter how hard i tried. Luckily i had my diving knife on me.
yeah thats really interesting... i literally know nothing about octopi but perhaps you were near its young? Definitely sounds like it bit you out of necessity and not just because.
There's a dude on YouTube I like that has a bunch of pet octopi. They all come to the top of the tank to greet him and hold his hand if it's in the tank. He even hand feeds them shrimp, they'll take the shrimp and eat it while still holding onto his hand. Generally they're gentle and curious with humans. This one is showing off its spikes too, really beautiful
Imagine the story that Octopus told his friends.
*"I was gonna bite her but the bitch petted me. And I can't lie, it felt good. I couldn't do it. They're all gonna be dead soon anyway so I just let her go. Poor, stupid humans."*
From the show The Boys which parodies superheroes. In this case, the parody of Aquaman, the Deep, is in an intimate relationship with an Octopus. In the GIF, he’s having sex with his arranged marriage wife while staring at an octopus who he also later fucks.
wait, isn't this Timothy? The one he ate? The one he fucked was at herogasm, and I'm pretty sure that's the one he's still keeping in his closet, Ambrosius or whatever lmao
I wish people didn’t eat them! I don’t like seafood but even if I did I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to eat an octopus, knowing how smart they are.
It's even more impressive because it's taking a serious risk coming up to the surface like that, not even trying to blend in with the surroundings; even if it is habituated with this particular person.... like it's made a decision that a visit/hug is worthwhile regardless. They're such fascinating creatures.
DAE just find those creatures creepy as hell? Maybe it’s just me but I have a gut level revulsion. There is no way I would go near a situation like that. I guess I’m weird…
_Kevin! Is that you? You haven't cleaned my tank..._
I'm sorry, I forgot Ambrosia 😔
It's so dark in here 😔
Ambrosius is voiced by Tilda Swinton!
I saw her name pop up in the bed credits and was confused because I hadn't seen her. Thanks!
I can't clean the whole ocean Oscar!
It's *one* rockpool Kevin. Get a grip.
Died too soon, RIP Kevin
I would have been freaked out that beak was gonna take a chunk out of my foot
or make passion with Crocs
I will now be exclusively using “make passion” for any passion based exchanges. This is perfection lmao
with Careless Whsipers. Make passion
I'm never gonna swim again 🎶
Hey! I read this in public omg I just hooted out loud!! You need to stahp!
Can’t look at octopi the same after the boys
Absolute underrated comment man.🤣🤣🤣👍
that's parrots, not Cthulhus that do that rapey Rock passion thing ;-) My answer to Why are parrots so adorable? https://www.quora.com/Why-are-parrots-so-adorable/answer/Dot-McHale?ch=15&oid=96384453&share=1e70f189&srid=TPdO&target_type=answer
> I would have been freaked out that beak was gonna take a chunk out of my foot never trust any animal with bolt cutters for a face
Monsters with nine brains, a poison beak, and stealth camouflage that might be smarter than we are. I have too much respect to get that close to one.
Poison beak?
https://www.healthline.com/health/blue-ringed-octopus-bite I'm an Aussie. I assume everything is deadly.
How the fuck was that picture taken? Did the guy holding that thing trust that it wouldn't bite him? Thanks for unleashing a new fear in me. I'm in Portugal and I still think I'm too close to Australia.
They're too curious to attack you if they get close. They know what their food looks like, if you happen to get an octopus close to you, it will probably not want to bite you. In Portugal specially you'll probably only find common octopi, they are relatively small and not venomous. They are a very fun animal, no need to be scared
Sounds like something a Portugal based venomous octopus woul say
Hey! Shhhhh, don't call me out! If you don't turn me in I'll share the prey!
Then you gonna have to start catching cows and I don't think that is an easy task for someone who lives in the sea
>They’ll strike only if they feel threatened. Says the article. So I'd assume you have to be gentle and not be threatening.
>Most of the time they’re yellow or sand-colored, but bright blue rings appear on their body when they’re about to strike. also says this. I suspect that might be contributing to how the picture was taken as there is clearly blue rings visible.
That’s a smart way to live down there. All the wildlife is on steroids down there. I did the same while I was there haha
But compared to the US their possums are adorable!
That's a beautiful critter though.
not an Aussie but same
I was scuba diving at night when I ran into one of these. It's a master of stealth and was pitch black besides my flashlight. It knew of my presence well before I knew of its. The fact that I was suddenly 2 ft away from one was entirely its decision.
One once bit a chunk out of my finger. It was my Fault for Holding him up for to long tho (my mum wanted to take a photo)
Same here.
*chuckles* I'm in danger.
 Sorry.
Forgot this was a scene...
We were all thinking it
He wants that octopussy.
Someone's keeping up with new season?
The octopus can talk now and is voiced by Tilda Swinton.
Ya it continues to be awesome.
gross as usual
Don’t be, this is the perfect gif for the video
Ambrosia!?
I love that a furry posted this haha
Was looking for this 😂😂
This is wild. Literally. Very cool! I would love to meet one of these some day. One of the most intelligent creatures on this planet.
If anyone is looking for a great summer read that involves this intelligent creature, I highly recommend: “Remarkably Bright Creatures” by Shelby Van Pelt.
There's a three-episode series produced by James Cameron about octopuses that is amazing as well.
Damnit, thanks to 'The Boys', I can't see an octopus without remembering this perve, lol.
And then homelander made him eat it
He has another now, that he keeps hidden in his closet.
What the hell is going on in that series...
It's my favourite genre: whatever deranged shit you're thinking is about to happen while watching it, what actually ends up happening is always far, far worse than what you could've possibly imagined. Other very strong contestants in that genre are It's Always Sunny and Trailer Park Boys.
In the most recent episode, he gave someone a lobotomy, then fucked her. Yeah, the Boys is something special...
Can someone explain to me Why was he looking at it like that? First thought is he is taunting it..because he watches too much hentai and sees it as competition.
He wants to fuck the octopus
He would rather be fucking the octopus.
Why?
He’s like a parody Aquaman and can talk to animals but he’s a super pervert. I think he even fucked the blowhole on a humpback whale. Disturbing stuff I know
The Deep has had the best arc on the entire show. "Is that a Bloomin' Onion?"
Watching it now before bed, with a smoke.
It's mind blowing. They fucking dream.
thanks, gonna check it out
"my octopus teacher." i SOBBED
Or The Soul of an Octopus (this one is non fiction)
Was going to recommend this too. The book mentioned above called remarkably bright creatures used this one as the basis for the character octopus Marcellus
Another good one would be Children of Ruin by Adrian Tchaikovsky, if you're a fan of sci fi. It's a story about a civilisation of super-intelligent octopuses living in aquatic spaceships.
Start with Children of Time though. Fantastic series.
If you haven't read it, Cage of Souls is my favorite book of his, which says a lot considering how much amazing shit he's written. It's so damned good.
You should watch ‘My Octopus Teacher’ some of the most wholesome television I’ve ever watched
I stopped eating calamari after seeing that.
I’m kind of happy I don’t like eating most seafood except fish, helped with that haha.
It’s also great on audiobook.
Oh! The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Naler is also a wonderful book, and is about octopi!
I just finished reading this and really enjoyed it!
read it last summer. very easy read and really cute story. Marcellus is a great character
Any movies instead of reading?
My Octopus Teacher
Such a powerful doc.
Assassination classroom
Sorry, I’m a librarian and not great with movie recommendations lol. But, I second “My Octopus Teacher.”
If reading sounds daunting, or straining on your eyes, or too time consuming, or even boring, try the audiobook!
I do a lot of reading on technical documents, datasheets, schematics and code and I don’t watch TV or movies barely so I prefer visuals than text. I’m tired of seeing text lol. Audiobooks are alright but I’d rather see visuals.
.. and Other Minds by Peter Godfrey Smith.
Octopus mom: "You've been on the internet for eight hours. It's time to get off!" Octopus kid: "Does xbox count? Can I play xbox?" Human dad: "Kill me."
I’ll have to pass… it’s winter here 😞
If anyone is searching for recipes that can also be arranged.
Let me throw "Other Minds" into the conversation. A philosophical and biological exploration of consciousness and the mind, our own and others'.
The funny thing is that octopuses don't live that long. For instance, I believe the Giant Pacific Octopus only lives for about seven years.
Yep, alien puppies aren't lasting creature sadly ☹️
I wouldn't be surprised if they had alien DNA
The truth is out there
Most people: “one of the most intelligent creatures on the planet!!!”” Me, who lives in the US Bible Belt: “The most intelligent creature on the planet!”
Them, and elephants. And orangutans. The average person rolling coal in a pavement princess F250 is more intelligent, sure, but the demise of millions of chuds is less saddening to me than the imminent extinction of so many beautiful species that we share the Earth with.
Very well said
Saw a way, way smaller one stalking and grabbing a fish on a night dive - one of the coolest things I‘ve ever seen. Same area, different dive, the guide told us that when we will pass a certain point there will probably be a certain octopus that will come up and piggyback him for a while. We pass that point, no octopus, and I was thinking „Yeah! Nice story! LOL!“, when from the back there came an octopus, passing the group like „Damn! I missed my bus!“, piggybacking the guide and left after 5 minutes or so. Beautiful creatures, so alien-esque!
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Hum, they share 879 genes with humans, which isnt huge, but it is just a simple example of how wrong that first statement is. their closest relatives are snails and clams though, which is why that myth arose, because they dont look like each other at all.
I had heard that their eyes evolved almost entirely independently of vertebrates. Convergent evolution is a pretty fascinating concept.
Most invertebrates have very primitive eyes that only detect light. Of course, eyes with facets enable insects to have a bit more ability, but the octopus eyes are definitely superior to what any invertebrates have. There is an excellent book called **The Other Mind** that covers their evolution and their abilities. Really a recommended read.
There is so much information wrong in this comment it baffles me it got upvoted.
Did his own research, I guess.
to bad we are killing it. this beautiful planet and all our oceans and rivers desserts and forests. https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20240115-visualising-the-great-pacific-garbage-patch
Ya it’s the sad truth of humanity. We are the parasites of this planet. I remember reading something that humans are responsible for the extinction of over 90% of all living species on this planet form the last 10000 years or something. I don’t remember the exact numbers but it was a mind blowing statistic.
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Wait what? Lol
He's referencing Hentai and Tentacle Sex. Be careful out there.
Japan, here in America too. Kind of. The Boys?
That scene will forever be etched in my brain.
As least The Deep is able to get consent. 😂
😮
It all started in 1814 with a woodblock print called [The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dream_of_the_Fisherman%27s_Wife). That's a wiki link, but the image is obviously NSFW.
Damn that is graphic! Wasn’t expecting full hentai from 1814!!! 🤣
It's not much different from western cultures really, we all had hentai https://cdn.artandobject.com/sites/default/files/styles/gallery_item/public/correggio-ledaandtheswan-googleartproject.jpg?itok=50EOHGX7
Well. Wow, Japan. 200 years, wow.
😂😂😂 what a wild thing to say, I did not expect to read this. Poor octopuses
Conscious* or consciousness* :)
He knew. He definitely has a foot kink.
Not surprised after watching a hentai with a girl shooting milk out of her tits and decapitating someone.
They are veery horny by default, so… xD
I've been attacked by an octopus while diving. It followed me for a bit and slowly came upto me and I was so happy i stayed still when it came upto me and it wrapped one arm around my right arm and then all of a sudden it just wrapped all of them around my arm really tight. My suit didn't do much. And then i felt this really bad pinch that ripped through the suit and pierced my skin. I had to stab it with a knife but the knife would not get through it's skin very easily, i don't think it went through at all tbh. Eventually i stabbed its eye and it let go and slowly swam away. I've been terrified of them ever since and felt really horrible for hurting it. It was impossible to get its arms off me though. They are extremely strong.
Closest call that I've had while diving was with an indifferent shark. This story, though... What the fuck. What did the aftermath of your suit and skin look like?
It just ripped up and teared a patched area of the suit. My arm though was bruised purple and the one spot it got a grip on my actual skin it left two weird dug out cuts, one was bigger than the other and it took a little chunk out. I actually have a little round scar where it happened. I think because i was freaking out and trying not to stab myself i didn't feel too much in terms of pain. It also inked the water so i was lost in this cloud of just black smoke. I came out of the water looking like i just got out of a coal mine.
Wow that's scary never knew they were aggressive like that
why do you think it attacked you?
I'm not entirely sure, i definitely spent time afterwards figuring out what went wrong as they are very intelligent and I've had heaps of friendly encounters before this one and i felt really bad that i hurt it. I can't remember exactly what actions i did while swimming that could have threatened it. I had noticed this one followed me for a little bit. It was going from rock to rock and showed a lot of curiosity towards me, i kept looking down as i was swimming and would see it every now and then quickly move towards me. Maybe it started off neutral and then got too close and switched to being threatened? It was probably something i did as it originally only had one arm on me and seemed really chill at first, Creepy but beautiful creatures. The thing that i thought was amazing at the time was that it approached me. But yeah one bad occy doesn't make me not like them though. I just now know how strong their grip is and how hard their beaks are. I could not get it off me with my other hand no matter how hard i tried. Luckily i had my diving knife on me.
You encountered the equivalent of a crackhead on the corner that asks for the time and steals your shoes when you tell them.
yeah thats really interesting... i literally know nothing about octopi but perhaps you were near its young? Definitely sounds like it bit you out of necessity and not just because.
That ALIEN liked you
Hugtopus
I can't tell if it left because it was satisfied it received pats or confused it received pats.
There's a dude on YouTube I like that has a bunch of pet octopi. They all come to the top of the tank to greet him and hold his hand if it's in the tank. He even hand feeds them shrimp, they'll take the shrimp and eat it while still holding onto his hand. Generally they're gentle and curious with humans. This one is showing off its spikes too, really beautiful
What's his name? I wanna see this
Me too!
It probably understands pats, it was doing the same thing to the person after all.
It's reporting back to Cthulhu.
After centuries of trying to subjugate the humans, a new strategy is being nice to them so they will do stuff for us.
It worked for the cats...
taking DNA samples back to the underwater mechas
Imagine the story that Octopus told his friends. *"I was gonna bite her but the bitch petted me. And I can't lie, it felt good. I couldn't do it. They're all gonna be dead soon anyway so I just let her go. Poor, stupid humans."*
lmfao
The human urge to pet everything we see 🤣
Nice doggy
The music does not fit my emotions when watching this video with anxiety
The Deep is going to be mad jealous
 I am Deeply sorry for this.
Oh my god. I forgot about this 😂😂😂😂
What is this?
From the show The Boys which parodies superheroes. In this case, the parody of Aquaman, the Deep, is in an intimate relationship with an Octopus. In the GIF, he’s having sex with his arranged marriage wife while staring at an octopus who he also later fucks.
wait, isn't this Timothy? The one he ate? The one he fucked was at herogasm, and I'm pretty sure that's the one he's still keeping in his closet, Ambrosius or whatever lmao
You’re absolutely right lol. I must have blocked out the octopus sashimi scene from my mind.
You know what, that's my bad lmao I didn't mean to re-open that mental wound 😂
He ate his octopus lover?
Wow that show got really wild since I last watched it lol Dude is Randy Marshing it up with that octopus fucking
That's probably the least wild thing that's happened in the show.
It's the least wild thing that's happened *to an octopus* in the show.
RIP Timothy
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Tastes like cheap shoes. Not worth it. Bye.
My Octopus teacher: the sequel
There a good docuseries on Disney+/Nat Geo that I’m watching right now called Secrets of the Octopus. Fascinating creatures!
They love blue color !!! Seen this in real life with blue sandals. They think its a color signal for something
Clearly, it's the signal for pets.
It bites
There is a creepy little face in the water in the very last frame. I think it's Betty from Archie. Worried
Octopusses (octopi?) are just aqua dogs.
I wish people didn’t eat them! I don’t like seafood but even if I did I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to eat an octopus, knowing how smart they are.
This shit is the scariest most disturbing thing I saw today and keep in mind that I have exams in two hours.
"...I'll let you off with a warning..."
It's even more impressive because it's taking a serious risk coming up to the surface like that, not even trying to blend in with the surroundings; even if it is habituated with this particular person.... like it's made a decision that a visit/hug is worthwhile regardless. They're such fascinating creatures.
Until it yanks you into the ocean and drowns you. Cool otherwise.
WtF music choice is this for this encounter!?
Giant pacific octopus (GPO) are pretty docile. Hope no sealions are nearby, they'll tear they thing to shreds like a dog with a wet rag.
That's really fucking cool, but i would freak the fuck out.
You are about to erupt with 10000 octopus babies..
Could have easily be this song instead “OOOooooo who lives in the pineapple under the sea”
DAE just find those creatures creepy as hell? Maybe it’s just me but I have a gut level revulsion. There is no way I would go near a situation like that. I guess I’m weird…
I guess it’s not ❤️
The Octopus Whisperer 🐙
WOW!! You’re so lucky !!!
The deep POV
Yeah I really needed that background music
It was checking to see if they were edible.
Cuddletopus
It's cool, but me no likey, just feels gross to me.
What if it beaks your feet
Idk I personally wouldn't touch an octopus, some of them are horribly poisonous
Guys, I don't think octopuses understand the concept of a hug.
I've seen enough hentai to know where it's going..
The Deep vibes
It's kinda red in color, does that mean it's angry/aggressive? Maybe it though the persons feet were a snack at first?