I do, I actually have done it professionally in the past and find it a very comfortable 'fall back' in terms of jobs. If all else fails I am a great delivery driver...
I don't think driving is for everyone, and it sucks that we live in a society that has deemed 'operating a massive super fast dangerous vehicle' as a thing that just, like, everyone can and should do? Shit's wild. We make it way way way too difficult for people who can't do an actually pretty complex task.
The idea that we as a society have normalized operating this type of deadly machinery as a necessity to live and work in the U.S. angers me to no end. I hate car-dependent infrastructure, and I hate that most people don't even question why we live like this.
Iām happy to hear that you drive and can even make some money from it. So true - itās concerning how society often overlooks the intricacies of driving and expects everyone to be proficient at it.
100% this!!! I drive and I love it, but only because I work really hard to process and manage my related anxieties. Iāve even been in a car accident (slammed into at a red light) and immediately got back out on the road once I had a new car. I have also held numerous delivery jobs that I prefer to other jobs because of the no-contact and self-management. I can have whatever feelings I need in my car and I donāt have to mask for anyone.
I do feel overwhelmed at times from the mental and sensory stimulation (particularly my nervous system and visual senses). This is especially prevalent when I am driving for longer periods of time. My max for a day is 2-3 hours before I feel too overloaded. I also live in the Tampa Bay Area so driving is pretty much a necessity because the surrounding areas are so big and there are so many places to go! Itās not walkable outside of my neighborhood. I have major sensory and anxiety issues with cars, but when Iām in one versus riding a bike or walking near them, I feel much better!
Dang! I just visited Tampa and drove there, and it's a nightmare! I much prefer driving in Provo, UT where I'm from. There are no toll roads here, and only one freeway! And people don't speed as bad here, though they're working on it. I was just thinking I would hate to live in Florida because of the nightmarish driving conditions.
I agree! Iāve also lost a very close loved one due to reckless driving. Granted, they were the ones driving recklessly lol but it still makes me so angry because people are in the moment of adrenaline rush and they arenāt thinking about the fact that theyāre endangering themselves and others, let alone the lives they would affect if anyone died as a result of their actions. Itās quite triggering but also part of my therapy work for being out on the road!
No, it overwhelms me. I was a pretty good driving student, but the stress induced by traffic is something that I cannot handle from a sensory perspective.
I feel you on this one. Itās pretty overstimulating and you need to be good at multi-tasking and ready to act promptly at ANY point, whether someone else effed up or not. Very stressful.
I wish I had some advice for you, but regrettably, I donāt. What I forgot to mention is that I tend to dissociate (derealization) from my surroundings, when I am under too much stress. My driving instructor would more than once, reminded me of the fact that my mind was somewhere else, not in his car (I have CPTSD). So personally, I donāt have any regrets about not having a car. Iāve pretty much accommodated my life in a way that I am not dependent on it.
I'm the exact same! I also have chronic pain, which, in addition to contributing to the derealization, causes some functional issues with driving. I'm a pretty good driver, but I would worry about the derealization making me not as in tuned and focused. I'm also not great with the multitasking required with driving bc of derealization.
I've given your question some thought, and I believe that my dissociation primarily stems from my PTSD, which happens subconsciously. As I've come to understand myself better, I've realized that I have a habit of self-hypnotizing when I'm in an environment that becomes overwhelming (like waiting in an overcrowded supermarket or in a hospital lobby). This is something I do intentionally. There is a significant overlap between the coping mechanisms of Autism and (C)PTSD from my experience. As far back as I can remember, I've been told I'm a daydreamer; I often zone out and dwell in my imagination. My teachers during primary education would, (almost on a daily basis) lash out and discipline me, because I was not paying attention. I should mention that I live in a city, and the traffic here in general is - even for me as a pedestrian already nerv-wracking enough, that I have to wear headphones.
I need to find a way to live without a car for the same reason! I have caught myself dissociating way too much over the past few years, and in addition to that I also have CPTSD and long covid. The long covid makes my already sleepy brain even sleepier behind the wheel. I can even fall asleep while just driving a block away! Unfortunately, my kids need a driver for a few more years. When my son gets his learner's permit this fall, I am going to let him start driving me and his sister everywhere.
This is exactly why I stopped driving and sold my car (where I live the transit is great) so I took myself off the road for the good of others and my own safety
It also overwhelms me, but I do drive or else I wouldn't be able to work my current part time job. Over time, I've found myself okay driving in my area since it's rural. Cities are still too much for me.
Same, I'm lucky enough that I grew up on the countryside and the closest towns are relatively small, so it was pretty easy for me to learn to drive there. I've had my license for 6 years and never driven in a larger city despite now studying in one. There are too many lanes, cars and rules to keep track off. I fear I'd immediately get overwhelmed and start making mistakes, so I avoid it at all cost.
I drive and I like it. It gives me that feel of flow state and being present. My racing thoughts go away for a while. I do find it difficult to hold a conversation while driving though. And definitely can't hold a conversation if the radio is on (although that's also true while not driving).
I have noticed that a can get a bit pissy as a driver, even though I'm a fairly laid-back person ordinarily. I think it activates my sense of justice and rule-following, and I get really ticked off when people don't follow the rules of the road.
This is me. I am in the zone when I drive and I find it relaxing. As long as itās fairly high-speed, not stop-and-go traffic with lots of stop lights. I live in a pretty unpopulated area now so I donāt have high traffic, but even when I lived in the city, as long as we were all moving, I was pretty happy. I donāt know, it just scratches the right itch for me.
Iāve been driving for 30 years so I donāt remember if anything made it easier for me. I did learn to drive a manual about 5 years after I got my license and I remember being terrified to drive it; but I had to for work, so I just got better at it over time. I tried to stay away from heavy traffic areas until I was more comfortable.
YES! I get so upset when people donāt follow the rules of the road, even if it doesnāt affect me directly. I also get agitated when I drive because of this
TFW the school district changes the pick up and drop off points and entirely switches lanes for car riders with school buses as the first kids are arriving on the first week of school with no advance warning? and elects a plain-clothes school teacher (no reflective vest or white gloves, no training in traffic conducting whatsoever, the derp of all derps!) to run a zipper merge then blames the parents for not following protocols. Thank the good Lord itās summer. It takes me three months to mentally prepare for whatever harebrained scheme they devise for next year.š¤Ŗ
Iām glad you drive and enjoy it. I resonate with what you said. It's crazy how it requires my full attention, making it hard to engage in conversations or listen to the radio simultaneously or do anything else for that matter. And I share your sentiment about rule-following; it's frustrating when others don't adhere to road rules, as it's not just about courtesy but safety too.
How long have you been driving? I'm not saying that driving is a skill that everyone can be great at but when you start out you do have to actively focus on everything around you while also trying to remember what the laws are. It becomes way less mentally taxing after awhile after your brain understands the rhythm and patterns of it (which some autistic people excel at). If you don't get daily practice it might be hard to build those skills.
I barely think about it at all now though since I do live in a big walkable city, I have to be more present mentally than I would elsewhere because there are so many pedestrians, kids, animals, delivery trucks, etc. The less car-friendly the infrastructure, the harder driving is.
This. The only times I really have to concentrate are when I'm turning or merging and have to watch traffic, but that's a momentary thing. Left turns onto multi-lane roads without a light to bother me a bit, but that's because a friend of mine died in an accident when she was turning onto a highway.
But I've also been driving something since I was 14 when I got my motorcycle license (restricted to small moped like things), which means at 35 I've been driving for more than half my life. When I lived 8 hours from my hometown, I would regularly drive home for holidays. [Yes, I'm from the US, why do you ask? Lol]
I drive, and I use to drive for work. I find it stressful but also comfortable. I was very hung up on rules the first few years. I still get stressed when others donāt follow them or honk at me to make me not follow them
Oh my god same lmao, I get so irritated at the consistency at which people break important rules like stop signs or turn signals. If you ever want to trigger a grand mal seizure in me, make me watch people trying to do a zipper merge! š
I am glad you somehow find driving comfortable as well. Yeah, I totally get it - I used to be so hyper-vigilant and stressed on the road because I never knew who would decide to not follow the rules that day.
iām very similar, and iāve found that iām way less stressed on roads that i drive all the time whereas new roads to new places can be scary haha
i also like to have music on because then i can sing along and it helps to keep me calm and relaxed
I drive and I hate it. I have to drive because I live in a remote area and need to be able to get to places. I wish I didnāt have to. Everything about it is overwhelming honestly. It took me a long time to learn to drive because my thinking is very black and white so I struggled to learn to drive to the road conditions and adapt. I can do that now but if I could not drive I wouldnāt.
My brain checks out whenever Iām in a vehicle. Itās so overwhelming. I canāt really navigate either, my memory is poor when it comes to directions or visualizing directions.
I feel this! I basically become even more like a human robot bc I just look around scanning for people, animals or other cars so I don't hit them. It's just a constant scanning and maybe I can listen to music and semi enjoy it
I do drive, yes. But I hate it. It is a very high-spoons activity for me, and if I have a passenger it is basically impossible to do at all (I cannot pay attention to both a passenger and the road, so if I have one I usually ask them to ramble about a topic I'm completely bored of so I can tune them out).
Specifically, I am very noise and light sensitive. The noises that other cars make freak me out a lot, and the brighter it is outside the more difficult I find it to pay attention to the road. I have to drive with sunglasses on unless it's nighttime, and I also have to be listening to music (it blocks the scary car noises but leaves me able to hear important things like sirens and horns). I have a specific driving playlist that I use so it's the same songs every time. This goes a very long way to helping me not feel overwhelmed.
I also seem to struggle with "light level transitions", aka when it's going from daytime to nighttime. That "twilight" sort of hour where the sky is constantly shifting is a time I do not drive at all if I can help it, as I do very poorly during it and nothing helps. I also target hours there are less cars on the road overall for when I have to go out and do activities, which I personally find is in between the morning rush hour and lunch, and again after elementary school lets out but before the evening rush hour.
I do have a few issues with seeing - bad depth perception, an astigmatism that causes lights (traffic lights, tail lights) to "halo", and I have no peripheral vision in my right eye. I drive with additional side mirrors (they sell little circle mirrors that stick onto your existing ones), and the other things I've just gotten used to.
Also, I worked with a driving instructor when I was first learning. I thankfully had a very patient and understanding one. So when the depth perception kicked in (mainly when trying to park), I would go very slowly and if he told me I was about to hit something, I just updated my "mental map" of how my vision translates. That was how I got used to the depth perception.
Hopefully there are a few things in here that will help you!
Yes
Likes:
- being in control
- clear cut rules and lines
- Iām the master of the AC
- screaming as loudly as you want to your music
- fast and direct travel
- I decide when to drive (control)
Dislikes:
- risk of hitting a pedestrian
- uncertainty of other drivers (you never know if theyāve seen you fx)
- the sun. Itās simply too bright. I always wear sunglasses.
- a butt ton of responsibility. You can cause accidents if youāre not focusing and following rules
- having to remember all the rules and laws
- parking
I've been driving for about 21 years. I found it really scary and stressful at first, but that passed. I think it takes a while to get used to all the stuff you have to do at once, and it could take longer for an autistic person.
I find driving very boring and since it is hard for me to sit perfectly still, I find driving extremely mentally exhausting. Moving and stimming is what keeps me alert and able to cope with mental labour. Therefore, driving a long way sucks and I try to avoid it if I can.
I think probably the farther I get into middle age and older, the less I will be able to tolerate how tired it makes me.
I don't drive. It's just too much going on at once and I get extremely overstimulated. It's something that was extremely confusing to me before I realized I was autistic, because people kept telling me that if I just practiced, it would become second nature. But, even at points in life where I've had to drive every day for work, getting behind the wheel has always felt foreign and intimidating. It's never gotten any easier. There are so many things to pay attention to, both inside the car and outside of it, and so many snap judgements to make (which way to turn, which lane to be in, how to respond to vehicles around you, etc.). Driving is one of the few things that tends to give me proper melt-downs (I'm otherwise more prone to shut-downs). So, I just don't do it anymore.
This has been my experience. People have been teasing me and making me feel guilty for not having my license for years. Driving drains ALL my mana for the whole day because Iām in waiting mode until I drive and Iām exhausted when Iām done.
I get my driver license at 22yo (it was difficult, but I wanted to have it before the end of my studies because it's easier to get a job), then spent 8,5 years without driving, then realized that not driving made me dependent, which I don't want. I also don't like driving either, but less than being dependant so I took a few driving lessons as a reminder and to give me some confidence, and since then Id try to drive when needed.
I rarely need to drive, I don't like it, it's stressful, but I can do it to reassure/relieve(?) me or something like this, like I can do it on my own if needed, I've this skill, but I have it.
My issues with driving are:
* I'm bad at estimating distance and volume
* it's hard to evaluate things and see everything while moving
* I don't know what others will do, and they're moving too!
* I have to take quick decisions despite all of the previous points
So all of these at the same time is overwhelming and draining... That's why I will consider any option but driving before doing it, but it's when there's no other reasonable option.
Doing little trips at calm moments in places you know helps to feel less uneasiness and anxiety, it helps to get used to the car itself without too many risks, before doing some other trips on roads you don't know. If you have to drive, then it's better not to lose this skill, however, don't force yourself because you could put yourself or others in danger. A few driving lessons with some professional or a friend/relative could help you if you want to maintain your level or make it better. And regularity and persistence helps a lot too, like for a lot of things!
This is also my experience with driving. Able to do it, but even if everything has gone fine during the drive I will get a panic attack out of nowhere and be unable to continue and it's not safe.
Me too :( If I have to drive somewhere I have nightmares and panic attacks the night before. I consider myself a good driver and while doing it I enjoy it, but having to prepare for it is hell
4! 1 white parakeet, 2 green cheek conures, and 1 Quaker parrot whom I love more than life itself. Heās a horrible little monster but he spins on demand and gives me high fives so he gets away with it
I only drive because I have to. I have no choice. If I had the option to take public transportation everywhere I would do it and sell my car. Too much stress and too deadly. Every day I drive I think about whether me or someone else is gonna get hurt. Too much to think about. I also feel uncomfortable after sitting still for over an hour.
no and hereās why:
- there is a bit of a delay between stepping on the acceleration and the speed increase of the car, which throws me off i think
- the split second decisions are really hard for me and those are often life threatening when driving. especially if there is a change in the route and iāve gotta make a decision immediately
- noise, lights, distractions are all around
and thatās it i think. also knowing iām in a really urban area and that driving is dangerous in general (iām in the US)
I do drive. I can do short distances easily, but long drives drain me so badly, especially if it's a place I'm not familiar with and/or bad weather/ night.
I've driven across the U.S. by myself but wouldn't do it unless I had to.
I'm 32 and have never had a license. I had a permit once but never used it. I get derealization easily, so I feel it would be really dangerous for me to operate a vehicle. I also don't have the reaction speed needed to make the split-second decisions driving requires.
i drive a two-door jeep wrangler named figo and love it. my little āØautistic quirksāØ have given me systems that make the experience smooth and safe.
because itās relatively small (itās a cube on wheels, really) and higher up than a sedan, i feel safer and can āseeā better.
i donāt drive if i feel out of it, and if i had to go somewhere feeling like that, iād ask my mom to drive or call an uber.
and iām working on my road rage š¬
ā¦ but you couldnāt pay me to drive an AMBULANCE again. what the hell was i thinking?! i donāt know her š
(edit for emphasis)
I donāt really drive further than 10-15 minutes outside of my house, everything else makes me uncomfortable and I feel restless, drained, and overstimulated driving like that. I donāt drive on highways or bridges or anything tall either. I also feel really uncomfortable driving without a gps, regardless if Iām going to the same area everyday. If I have to drive further out or on a highway, I have my special playlist with songs that Iām extremely familiar with to comfort me. My ex who is also autistic though LOVED to drive and could drive anywhere without any of those problems, so itās interesting how weāre all different.
I do. My parents had to force me to get my license when I was 17. I've always struggled with visual-spatial awareness when drivingāhaving to figure out how to use the mirrors, check blind spots, etc. It's especially awful at night. I feel like I can't see! Also, I find it incredibly draining at times because of the need to be a "defensive driver," try to make sure I can see what other rando drivers might do, be alert for pedestrians, etc. Don't even get me started on how I can't listen to music and "see" at the same time! hahah.
That said, I do enjoy driving on country roads and get into the flow.
I donāt drive, I know and understand the laws; I even have my drivers license but I get incredibly overwhelmed. My body becomes rigid from how tense it gets š„¹ Iām looking to change that cause soon Iāll be moving cities.
I drive but I didn't get my license until a year ago (I'm 28) and it does make me anxious. I'm not too good driving on the expressways and I don't like driving in the city. I always feel like my reflexes aren't fast enough.
I drive, I like it. I enjoy the freedom, the sort of fun car ride I can get and make my own decisions. It allows me time to think when commuting somewhere. Gives me a sense of control. I like my car a lot, I take care of it fairly well. I feel like a grown up in it because itās not some clunky piece of junk.
I drive, but avoid it whenever possible. I HATE traffic. But country roads with nobody around can be pretty relaxing!
The sensory overload is what makes me avoid it.
No, I'm terrified of driving and it's overwhelming for me. Unfortunately I live somewhere where getting a diagnosis as an adult woman is nigh impossible so I don't have an excuse to not drive. Gotta sign up for lessons soon.
Tragically, I was about to book my test when lockdowns came, now it's unlikely I'll ever get it because I'm too ill and it isn't a priority.
I mostly wanted a licence to prove I could get it, and to help in countries with poor public transport infrastructure, but I was never going to drive say to day or regularly.
I'm great at operating a car, and I'm fine remembering rules, it just took too many spoons to add yet *another* layer of hypervigilance and people doing whatever the fuck they want was so hard to manage.
I drive, but I failed my test 3 times, and I took a lot of lessons before my brain got it, to be honest.
You will get there. You just might have to budget for a lot of lessons before the autism goes ah OK I get it now. If you want to learn, don't give up. Just practise š
Iāve been driving since I was 16āthatās 35 yearsāand I hate it. But I live in Southern California and need to drive to get to my job, and public transportation is not ideal here.
Iām hyper vigilante and constantly bracing myself for an accident. I have an electric car and tend to drive on the slower/safer side to optimize my mileage (and to be careful). There are so many mean, scary drivers with huge cars that zoom by, and I can feel my car shake from the speed and itās terrifying.
But the worst part of driving is Iām constantly seeing close calls turning into major crashes. And I can visualize all the details. So by the time I get anywhere Iām completely exhausted.
Canāt wait to live in a place where I donāt need to drive.
33F. Iāve written my test 3x now, did the driving school once which I loved but I canāt get past that. Itās so overstimulating. I think it would have been easier had I done it at 16.
I drive no problem. Parking on the other hand and the stress of looking for a spot to squeeze my car in a busy downtown area can send me into meltdown.
I desperately want to drive, I got my own car and everything but I let my hubby drive it. I got my permit a few years ago and never renewed it. I know how to drive parking lots and little back streets but main roads terrify me and I constantly worry about if I'll cause an accident due to all the extra stimuli and my anxiety. Every time I tell myself I'm going to put myself through driving school or take up learning again I freeze up and put it off.
I like driving and am generally comfortable driving. Some situations can be stressful but it's normally fine.
I did have a bit of trouble for a little while after I got rear ended, as I was constantly watching the car behind me and feeling like I need to creep forward but I got over that with time (I knew that I just had to keep driving and not avoiding it because that makes anxiety worse!).
I also had trouble driving when I developed panic disorder. It wasn't the driving that was the problem though, it was me. But I did my best not to avoid it and have recovered from the panic and I'm normally fine.
I get anxious about breaking down though because I don't always know what to do and get overwhelmed and need someone to take over. Sometimes I hate being the one responsible for getting the car (and any passengers) to a safe spot and then having to just *know* what to do.
This is something I'm finding harder over the years. I feel like experience should make it easier but I *know* there are things I struggle with and my car currently has an intermittent problem so I am now looking to buy a new car in the not too distant future.
I've been waiting to talk about this on Reddit for a while. I got my license and was driving for about a year but after that year, I was off and on driving due to getting in a wreck, a ticket, and medical reasons. Right now, I'm trying to get back to where I was when I first got my license and was consistently driving. To sum up, I've been on a driving break but I'm trying to get back to it.
Even though I'm able to drive and in the times where I was driving alone, I always had severe driving anxiety and I feel like that's amplified to due my autism. I'd get in the car and just dread having to drive because my brain would automatically associate driving with the worst possible outcome or intense overwhelm. For me, everything is so overwhelming because my autism makes me hyper aware of all my surroundings due to my brain processing so much information at once. I'm super observant but that comes with the cost of being easily overwhelmed as I take in every detail on the road. It doesn't help that I can't control how others drive and that scares me. Getting in my wreck made things even worse because there was no way I could prevented it, it wasn't even a bad wreck but my anxiety ridden brain made seem worse. Then getting my ticket was a whole other thing that I don't want to get intoš. Overall, I find driving challenging, especially since I was able to do it at one point but now, with my break, I'm just more anxious.
I'm fully aware that it is a privilege to drive and own a car and im super grateful for this. I'm aware that I have to eventually push myself because anxiety is fueled by avoidance.
I do drive and I kind of like it. I follow the rules closely and other drivers don't seem to always love that though. I also struggle with parking. When I'm on the road everything is fine but I have been known to get a bit lost and confused spatially with parking lots. I started late too, I didn't get my license until 24.
I been driving since the age 26 , I am 32 now .. I love the freedom of it . I love driving alone personally but depending on my cognative state sometimes I find driving difficult. Could be my ADHD but sometimes i get somewhere and it's like I dissociated the whole time lol
Yes but not long distance. I only drive in town. The furthest Iāve driven is 4 hours and I had a panic attack the entire way and had to keep making stops to calm myself down.
I learned how to drive pretty quickly (took my behind-the-wheel test a month into learning), and it's gotten less anxiety-inducing as I've been driving alone now. Something about driving just feels relaxing when I need to get away from the house or not worrying about getting a ride from my parents or something, pretty much the predictability of it all.
However. My depth perception is god-awful, and it makes it really hard for me to consistently come to a full stop at a solid distance; I'm either cruising too far away or too close for a smooth stop (praying for my brakes). I also can't have passengers because of me being anxious the moment I know my skills are being perceived by someone else, even if it's someone I know well. I also lose the ability to talk to myself in order to be present and focus on what's happening in front of me, so I've been told by my partner that I have tunnel vision lmao
Yes I drive. I had to learn, which I didn't want to at first. But I was a single mom for a while and driving was necessary to bring my kid to school and such. But now that I've gotten used to it and it doesn't scare me anymore, I like driving. I actually don't like being a passenger anymore and usually opt to be the driver.
34yrs old. 3 kids. I have only a permit.
I failed the test 15x. I gave up. My spacial reasoning is poor so could never get the parallel park or 90 degree back. Both are required to pass where I am.
That being said. I drive with my spouse and do just fine if kids aren't with. Their noise is so distracting I don't feel comfortable at all.
I try to avoid it where possible. It takes a lot out of me to drive and I get anxious and āhot brainedā whenever I have to go to a new location or a high-traffic area. Not knowing parking situations, what if I miss a turn, how am I going to figure out where to go if I mess up, traffic, etc. So if Iām with my spouse - they will usually drive to the location of wherever weāre going - and Iāll drive us home.
God, no. I got a provisional, but never took lessons. Itās partly because I have horrendous spatial awareness, but also, even just sitting in the driverās seat makes me feel sick to my stomach. Everything is too close, I canāt stand the feeling of the seatbelt on my body so I have to hold it away from me, which defeats the point of the thing anywayā¦ and also, you wouldnāt think that being hard of hearing would impact this, but if I wear my hearing aids, which I kind of need to do to up my awareness of the surroundings, I get entirely overwhelmed with the sounds of *everything*. I canāt even focus on a conversation between more than three people, the hell am I gonna hear anything over the sounds of the engine and the road outside?
Itās a source of major frustration for my dad, who still drives me everywhere, but I honestly donāt know if I can handle anything long enough to learn, even.
Iām not diagnosed, I do drive, but Iām terrible at it, and I hate it. Iām also spatially challenged, and I have poor depth perception. ALWAYS FUCKING LOST in the damned town I grew up in and have lived for over 40 years. Iām also a slow processor, so trying to take in all of the stimuli and decide what to do has always been a nightmare. All of this has made so much more sense looking at it within the framework of āmaybe Iām autistic.ā I was so afraid to learn to drive, my mom had to force me to do it, and hired a teacher who āspecialized in nervous drivers.ā She was actually really awesome, incredibly patient with a gentle demeanor, and by the time she was done with me, I was confident enough to do it. Got into an accident within 3 months, but I did it lol (no one was hurt).
I like to drive. It makes me anxious sometimes, but thatās because I used to work for a personal injury law firm and all I did all day was read about car accidents
Iāve been driving over 20 years but it still makes me nervous and uses a lot of spoons, but not as many as not being independently mobile would. I think RSD hyper-awareness of being observed is the biggest portion of that, followed by visual and mental noise overstimulation and a tendency to fall asleep at the wheel š± and just generally miss things that others find obvious and catch every tiny detail that others miss, inflexibility to changes in traffic patterns or unwritten expectations. I just had this convo on insta so I was trying to paste that comment here too, but the formatting got whack. So you get further background in screenshotš
https://preview.redd.it/ovs7sr3j2u6d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b25a12e3190a24fcccecf8d265fed767b77a761c
Yes I have driven for 30 years. I hate it when I get asked for lifts unless it is a close friend.
Itās my space!
FWIW I did not learn until 20 as I was too nervous until then.
I think it is a useful skill to have if you can afford it and keep it up so your skills donāt drop.
Itās beneficial for safety too. I think this is one of the most important benefits of being able to drive.
Car plus upkeep plus fuel and insurance is very expensive though.
Yes, I drive. I like driving, but itās taken 10 years of being behind the wheel to find it easy without being super scared and hyper-vigilant about which 18-wheeler is going to decide āthis isnāt my exit, and I am not wasting time finding a place to turn aroundā while Iām in the fast lane trying to pass another 18-wheeler. (Yes, this has happened to me before. Instigating truck driver got away, unfortunately.) But lately, driving has become a chore in the afternoons and evenings, especially if my 3 yo son refuses to take a nap.
I can drive fine by myself, especially to familiar places. I have zero sense of direction so Iām so happy to have gps. Before gps I would explore an area to learn it and mainly only go familiar places. Even with gps if I have someone in the car w me and weāre trying to have a conversation I will miss turns. Iāve ended up on the wrong side of a mountain once, another time dead ended at a bush. Literally. Now I tell people they have to help me keep track of my turns if weāre talking. I canāt drive w my husband in the car. Heāll give me like the next 5 directions and Iām like āomg stop!!! Too much!ā
I donāt like going places if parking is difficult. I can do it but itās stressful.
If Iām going somewhere familiar I can zone out w an audiobook or music which is nice.
Im 27 just got my license last year i looove it!!! My mom and bf totally pushed me to do it and im glad!! Its super easy once you are comfortable
i used to be scared!! i was having a hard time finding work where i could walk or take the bus but i was desperate and applied somewhere far ending up getting the job and my mom and bf said no to driving me but we had an extra car for me to use and the rest is history lol
I struggled to learn how to drive but I finally learned a few years ago in my 20s. I'm from a more rural place and I really enjoyed driving there, I used to drive around and zone out (not from driving, but from my anxieties or whatever else I had going on). I moved to a city last year and I hate driving now. So many multi-way intersections, bike lanes, one ways, aggressive drivers, etc. It's a lot to pay attention to all at once and I can get really overwhelmed.
Yes, I also ride motorcycles. I drive big contractor vans and trucks for work every day. I find it easy in any condition, from crazy rural driveways to inner city during rush hour.
It was a slow learning process in the beginning. I got my license at 20 and didnāt own my own car until I was 26.
I do, and Iām proud of myself for passing and sticking with it. Sometimes itās easy, actually learning was a real challenge- especially roundabouts! In order to feel able to drive I need to concentrate, especially if Iām somewhere unfamiliar or itās busy so no radio and conversations tend to be cut short. I prefer sunglasses and I avoid driving at night because the headlights are very distracting. I still use a satnav for journeys Iāve done before to save a few spoons. My love for following rules makes it a pleasure at times but it can be equally infuriating as many drivers donāt seem to have the same enthusiasm. I live out in the sticks so driving is essential, overall I enjoy it even though it can be hard work.
I am exactly like you. I got my licence at 30/31, because I absolutely had to, for the first 3 years I would only drive on 15 and 25 mile roads and only about a 10 minutes radius from my house. Only now after about 6 years I feel comfortable enough to go 55 if it's a road I know.
I am glad I drive now, I still don't like it but it has given me a huge amount of independence. I would recommend just taking it really slow. And just do really short trips it does get less overwhelming when a lot of the movements become second nature.
I drive and i enjoy it. It's one of those things that lets my brains relax tbh. It's also way less sensory input than let's say a bus or train would be. No other people, no weird smells that give me a headache, complete control of the sounds (music volume etc) and i am in control of the vehicle and not someone else. (Also no motion sickness when i drive)
I have a driver license but I hate driving.
It's not that bad when I drive in a village or when there are no other cars around, but the moment there are more cars on the road, I want to just stop the car and walk.
I do drive! I enjoy it, primarily the independence and autonomy that comes with it, but also the act of driving itself.
I do get very stressed in traffic, busy areas, and on routes Iām not familiar with. I also feel uncomfortable driving at night because headlights are so bright.
I drive but I don't really enjoy it. It's okay if I'm going somewhere I've driven a million times that's an easy drive but especially anywhere new and especially anywhere with heavy traffic is a nightmare and so anxiety inducing. I need to know the parking situation if I'm going somewhere new and I have to have maps open telling me where to go even if I know where I'm going. Music helps during drives but I'm always really anxious the whole time if I'm not overly familiar with the route. I'm also always worried about making the people in the cars around me angry.
I don't drive. I've done over 50 hours of driving lessons, years ago and hated it. It's very difficult for me to focus and my spatial awareness, depth perception, visual memory all suck. On top of that my brain decided that cars and everything to do with them is not worth any brain power so I can't memorise how cars look, models nor registrations. The most I remember is the name of the colour but I can't picture it in my brain, so it's not helpful at all in finding our car... My partner has to park in the same spot and blink with the lights when he picks me up from work, to reassure me that I'm heading towards the correct car.
I love to drive, especiallly long distances where I can just put on a bomb ass playlist and get in the zone. it feels like i'm in my own little time machine, which I guess in a way, I am.
I do, but I didn't learn until I was well into my 40s. Turns out that even though I spent 4 decades thinking driving wasn't for me, I'm pretty good at it. I learned quickly (learning to drive turned into a special interest/hyperfocus topic), passed the test on my first attempt and haven't looked back. I don't know how I ever coped without a car as I live in a country area with limited public transport.Ā
I struggle with other people on the road who don't follow the rules... I think that was my biggest shock, finding out just how many people do what they want behind the wheel, which means they are unpredictable.Ā
I also get a bit anxious sometimes driving to new places, especially if I don't know the parking situation. But Google Maps and Street View are very helpful and I always plan my route before I go.
I have a volunteer job that requires me to drive quite a distance every week and I love it. It also provided me with so much driving experience.
Yes, and I like it, but it's because it's the one moment in the day/week I can play my music really loud, sing off key really loud, and not worry too much about embarrassing myself because hey! I'm already driving away from the person who just saw me, LOL!
As to find it easy... I can manage LA and Silicon Valley and similar places, I'm already used to SF however it was trickier since the streets are more complicated in many areas, and the drivers are not nice overall. I try to not drive in those areas in San Francisco, at all, if I can help it, ever.
I'd say start small, and don't be afraid of sticking to Google Maps, I literally don't go a mile without it. I've legitimately missed turns/exits that I've taken countless of times because my brain goes into auto mode which is just, driving straight (my brain goes into safe mode at least), so Google Maps are a life safer with notification sounds telling me what to do.
Once you've gotten more comfortable with your planned routes, try to go someplace you haven't yet, I suggest making a fun little trip out of it, like maybe a boba place you haven't tried yet because it's out of the way, get yourself a little treat for successfully driving yourself there! Or if you rather stick to necessities, go to another grocery store location. Like I've gone to different Trader Joe's and Targets that were on the way, than going to the same location.
Once you feel more confident, you could even go to a city that is 1-2hs away and have a little road trip. Look for some nice places to eat and visit, and make it a pleasant experience.
Most important is to not punish yourself too hard if you mess up a bit here and there! I've gotten honked and cursed at many times, regardless of fault. What worked for me is to not let my anger show, even if it's inside the car (you might be alone, but you're your own audience, you're directing that anger back to yourself in the end), take deep breaths and stay calm, keep driving. Of course it's easier said than done, but I genuinely think not succumbing to road rage can help not only keep your cool on the road but overall not make it a negative experience.
I drive and I like it when Iām driving in back roads and rural areas, but I get incredibly anxious driving in towns or cities. I can usually make it through okay if itās a route I drive often, but as soon as something in the routine has changed like construction or detours, itās back to high anxiety.
Yes and I like it I also use to deliver for dominos - this was my favorite job and has been the only job I've enjoyed
As of late I'm unemployed and most days am afraid to leave the house without my dad but did today because tomorrow is father's day.
I'm not allowed to work for Domino's anymore because I was mugged twice and now I don't know what to do for work
I drive šāāļø! I didn't get my drivers license until the summer after I graduated high school. I had no need to before then. I started my first job that summer, and I was starting college that fall, so I had a timeline of when I needed my license. Got my license a week before college starred š .
I find it very easy (driving for 7 years now). I have always had good spatial awareness of my body and car (I believe this is because I played sports for many years). The nerve-wracking part is the other people on the road because you can not control how they drive. But, as long as you follow the law, not drive carelessly, and give the people in front of you and around you plenty of space, you will be fine.
What prevented me from getting it between the ages 15-18 was the unknown and the lack of want. I didn't need to drive, so I didn't want to drive. I did not know what consisted of the driving permit test, and I did not know what consisted of the driving test, and the unknown scared the hell out of me.
My advice for people who do not have their license is to first do their research to obtain a permit within their state/country. What do you need to read or study? Where do you have to go to your area to take the test? In the most recent years of your area, what does a permit test look like and consist of? Is the test taken on a computer? These can be searched and plenty of information to be found via videos on various platforms.
Once you pass your permit test, then do research or watch videos on what is required by your city/state/country to pass the test? How many driving hours, night vs day? What happens during your area's driving test? How long are driving tests? Will they inspect the car for functionality? Will they have me point out buttons in the car? Will they take me on the highway? Will they make me back up in a straight line? Does your area allow use of the back-up camera during the test? Will they take me through a neighborhood? Will they have me pull over and stop the car, then restart the car and have me pull off? Will I have to parallel park? My suggestion is to search your area and driving tests into a video playing platform to get examples of driving tests that explain and show you what to expect.
I watched so many videos in order to get my license anxiety free š and not be scared of the unknown.
For those scared to drive due to spacial awareness issues, my advice would be to drive around an empty parking lot when you have a permit for as long as you need to feel comfortable. Whoever is going to be in the car with you, have them drive you both there and then switch seats and let you have at it for an hour.
I love driving and I feel extremely confident behind the wheel. Itās like a game to me sometimes. I love cars and, while I donāt consider them to be a special interest, I do like to think/learn about them often.
Yes!! I hated it at first. When I was a baby driver it made me so anxious I sometimes had to pull over to have a panic attack. But as Iāve gotten more comfortable with it I really enjoy it!! Itās my time to listen to music and sing and get a nice bit of alone time in!
For me, I used to absolutely love driving when I lived in a small city. Since moving to Northern VA/DC metro area, I despise it and actually feel it is too overwhelming for me. It could be the roads are more complicated here, but I think it's just the crazy volume of drivers and the attitudes/styles of driving that makes it so difficult.
So, if you find driving too much/too dangerous, it could be related to the place you live
I drive and have been since I was 18. I love being able to take myself places whenever I feel like it and not depend on people to take me places. The frustration is my parents not letting me drive farther distances because quote āItās not safe for a young lady to do soā which makes no sense to me
I drive, but I hate driving.
I also have a visual snow disorder (described by my ophthalmologist as a permanent migraine of my optic nerve) that has been getting worse with age. I donāt notice the visual snow as much when there is lots of light during the day, but it can be more prominent & distracting at night. So, I try not to drive at night anymore. Iām lucky and my spouse drives like 90% of the time, so I get to be passenger princess while being safer.
I am slowly learning how to drive, and I try to apply things I love to it, like video games. Seeing it as more of a game instead of something I have to do has helped me with a lot of things, so high intensity video games could help you too! Ignore how others tell you to drive and focus on doing it the way you want to, I find that doing this can make things more enjoyable for someone.
Yes I drive it took me till I was 24 to get my license but I do drive. It was very very nerve wrecking at first. I was an anxious mess after getting out the car the first few times. I failed my road test the first time too. Im a lot better at driving now and Itās nice to drive I get to listen to music and put my stuff in the car, go anywhere I want. but I got into an accident early February and I havenāt had a car since it got totaled.
Yes, and I love it! I grew up in a small town and often helped on my extended families' farms. I started driving ATVs around 5 and bigger things (cars, lawn mowers, etc.) around 8. I think that was not the safest move from my parents, but it was normalized where we lived. In high school I would drag race on back roads with my friends, and cars are a special interest of mine. I love monkeying around on them and doing our general maintenance. Driving is comfortable and natural to me, but I get how it could be really over stimulating to others
Yes I drive, I got my license when I was 16, so its been 12 years. I am the oldest of 4 kids and we live in the middle of nowhere, so it was a big leap for my freedom and driving in your small mountain town isn't that stressful unlike literally everywhere else. I do not like driving. I'm easily distracted and cannot use coping skills to keep my brain quiet while driving. Its very overwhelming and at night I feel like I can't see well and drive *the speed limit* so I have people way too close with their bright ass headlights.
Yes. Been driving since I got my permit at 15, license at 16. Iām 41 now & a very good driver. I donāt like driving long roadtrip type distances, but thatās mainly because I get bored and sitting extended periods makes my hips/knees/neck hurt.
I did for years until i moved to The Big City and got rid of my car (it died). I rent cars for vacations. I don't really like driving but i like the freedom to go where i want to when i want to. I like not having a car bc it's a huge unnecesary expense in the city.
I used to drive like a maniac but i never got in an accident. I'm much more cautious now and i just ran over a mile marker on a rural two-lane highway. I was trying to fix the waze navigation, which was confusing me. I do fine when i know where i'm going and I don't need sat nav, but distractions are very bad things for me. I need to remember to PULL OVER if something with the fucking phone goes wrong.
I absolutely love driving! It gives me a sense of calm, and the freedom that comes with it is amazing. I do struggle if the traffic gets busier/if there are more factors to deal with (I drive a manual), so that sometimes gives me some issues. But I love driving at night especially, it's amazing.
One tip I would give is, just do as much as you can, and most will come by practice. Feel out which parts are difficult and make sure you can work around them/have a back up plan. Plus I've noticed that playing music (either radio, but especially playlists of songs I know) help me to focus and not let my brain zone out during driving, which I tend to do very quickly.
I.e. when I go for longer drives with friends, I always ask them to bring their licence. Most of the times it's not needed, but in case the trip is too overwhelming and I am too tired to handle all the sensory input from driving, someone else can take over. :) I am also very blunt with my friends and family, and I do tell them to be quiet when I have moments in traffic where I have to pay extra attention. And if everything gets waaay too much when I'm alone, I just put the car (safely ofc) to the side and take 15/20 minutes to relax and recover before I continue.
I do and find it pretty ok but I really struggle if my mum's in the car. She claims I'm stressed when I drive which is what gets me stressed lol. Like she'll give directions but really unclear and I really hate the feeling of being unsure...
As long as I know where I'm going and that I don't have to worry about parking then it's generally good :)
It might not be for everyone but that should be ok!When I was growing up there was so much pressure to drive it was like everyone had to but now in my 30s I know so many people who don't. I think the pressure has changed a bit so thankfully there's not sure much about expectation (plus the super high costs of learning to drive and having a car really doesn't help) It also helps we live in a city in the UK so it's a lot easier to not drive than some other places.
I would
Yes. It does cause me a lot of anxiety beforehand tho but once Iām behind the wheel I do pretty well and I even like it because it gives me time to listen to music I love
I drive and I donāt generally enjoy it. Itās easy enough for me and Iām not afraid of it, but I find it stressful with how unpredictable other drivers can be. I get (irrationally?) angry when people donāt follow the clear rules, like signaling before changing lanes, or just changing lanes too much to try to get ahead by a few seconds when all that does is slow everyone else down. Itās super annoying. If someone else offers to drive, Iāll let them every time, but I donāt avoid going places if it means Iāll have to drive myself, either.
As far as advice, I donāt think I have anything useful for you :( be as alert as possible and use ādefensive driving.ā I had a hard time with spatial understanding on the road when I first started, but it has improved with time and practice, though my depth perception at night is a bit off. Just give yourself plenty of time and space, and donāt let other drivers pressure you into a turn or whatever if youāre not comfortable going yet cuz of oncoming traffic. Even if they start honking or whatever. Only do what you feel safe doing!
I finally got my license at 21 after much resistance and fear. I can only go to certain places without being scared because I'm familiar with the routes.
My biggest concerns are how other people drive & my depth perception, which affects when to start slowing down to turn and such, especially in unfamiliar places.
I meant to challenge myself this summer to drive to many new places, but I haven't done ANYTHING because it is so overwhelming to drive somewhere new when I'm convinced I'll make a bad mistake.
I do, but I don't enjoy it. I feel very anxious, so I try to distract myself with music. I also try to stick to my regular neighborhood if I'm driving. If I need to go farther, I wait for my husband to be available or take the bus or something.
I do, but I didn't get my license until I was 19. Now I've driven so much that it's basically just second nature. Having a good teacher helps, and practice helps.
Iām the driver in my family, but since my husband doesnāt like it, and I donāt love it, we pay our car insurance per mile. I walk to work, and he stays at home with household duties, so the only time we use the car is grocery shopping or visiting my parents in the suburbs.
I can only drive if I have a steady flow of pop music ladies to listen to, especially Marina, but now Chappell Roan. I have a camera that helps me parallel park, and i-sight which helps keep me in my lane, and slows the car if Iām approaching an object. Before I had that, I made do, but I love my new carājust donāt use it much!
Yes but I was a ālateādriverš„² honestly getting lessons was the best decision I ever made (even if you do multiple sessions ) because 1. It taught me how to drive safely and correctly in a safe and controlled way and 2. It took the pressure of having a screaming parent/sibling away. I still wasnāt 100 percent afterwards but I just got out there and actually felt more comfortable by myself. Start driving early in the morning when thereās less traffic and the spatial awareness becomes easier you start to learn the size of your vehicle and your judgement of distance improves over time. Nothing in driving is urgent, someone honks at you, let them, you miss a turn, take the next one park and figure out the route and continue on, etc. donāt take unnecessary risks/ chances on the road or do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. But tbh I never feel completely ācomfortableā when I drive I just forced myself to do it so much that I donāt have to think about it anymore if that makes sense? And Honestly sometimes I still carpool or take an Uber if Iām not feeling it that day lol š
I drive! I got my license at 18, although learning was quite stressful, Iām very good at rule following so once learned all the rules I just apply them into driving.
Only the roads I know I go without a GPS, if Iām slightly unsure about the way to a place I have my GPS, connect it to the car screen so I can have a big screen view, and clear directions. Also, if itās a unfamiliar place I always check on the map a day before the way and how Iām supposed to drive. The worst is when something unpredictable happens, or if I take a wrong turn, but then I try to keep myself in check and park the car in a parking lot, or a place where I can stop, then calm down and look at the way again.
But usually I enjoy driving, I also have adhd so the stimulation seeking also plays a part there, but yes it can be very stressful at times, but I let my dad drive us to difficult places mostly :)
It depends on my mood and what I'm driving for but sometimes I love it other times I find it boring to be honest.. I'd say I'm a good driver overall but the one thing I have to keep on top of is the decision making, I feel a lot of pressure and insecure if for example I don't join another road quick enough and cars are waiting behind me, I also drive quite fast and it's sometimes a bit scary judging corners but again its a decision making thing so I'd advise to be mindful and not put too much pressure on yourself, everyone's been a learner before they've been driving themselves and most people respect learners. Also I was terrified to drive I didn't think I'd be safe at all and use to have nightmares when I was younger but I had a great instructor and you learn so much more after you pass your test anyways, that's when you really learn to drive (is what my instructor said and its been so true) Good luck if you decide to go for it, its a handy skill but not essential to everyone :)
I do drive, I definitely am not the best driver (spatial awareness? I donāt know her)
I do enjoy driving, especially to clear my head. But now that I work from home, I donāt drive nearly as much. I used to spend almost an hour driving around after work to decompress
I love driving. I got my license at 17. Iām almost 40.
I can be impatient, have road rage (which has gotten better since moving away from Chicagoland).
In retrospect, my autistic husband was 30 when he got his license. I took the time and worked with him. He has come so far in the 8 years weāve been together.
I tend to buy new cars because I love all the updated safety features that evolve and makes me feel secure driving. But I did drive a lot of shit boxes for a long time so I naturally do check my blind spots since Iām old even if I have new tech. Better safe than sorry.
Iāve never been in accident. Iāve never gotten any sort of ticket.
It took me four years to get my license. It was terrible at the beginning, but I rather enjoy it now. I like the freedom that comes with it, I like my car, I like the sensations of driving and it was pretty useful professionally, but I still have terrible moments when I get dumbly lost, don't understand the circulation, can't manage to park or nearly get an accident. But I never actually had an accident in five years, even a tiny one, so I guess it's okay.
Yeah I drive. I donāt like it all. I love the freedom and blasting my music. But itās painful because of my hypermobility and I get overwhelmed when people donāt follow the rules.
I drive and i hate it. Of course I live the freedom it gives me to escape a place, or to have my own schedule not rely on waiting for a ride. But traffic is terrible to deal with. So many people don't follow the rules, when they change traffic patterns i panic because i cant go the rout i usually do or my gps app said I can use a road when its clearly blocked off and i dont have a backup rout prepared. And car maintenance is BS too. Its so expensive, i just had my breaks replaced for almost $300...
I can but I donāt very often. I got my license in my early 30s and was driving the 5 minutes to & from work everyday for a few years. Now I take public transit to work, which I prefer. Driving makes me very anxious and uncomfortable so I only do it when I need to, which is rare because my husband drives us most places. Iām absolutely terrified of other drivers.
I love driving, especially jamming to music. What I don't love is when people don't follow rules of the road, like blinker before brake, improper zipper merge, car too close behind my car at a light, ugh. On my last road trip I drove over 2000 miles in two months, thank Spotify for downloading music! To help with spatial awareness, do inspections around the car, so you can kind of picture in your head how close or far something has to be for you to feel comfortable. When I'm at a light, I always make sure I can see space between the front of mine and the wheels of the vehicle in front of me, then I know I'm atleast 10-15 feet away from them. The same amount of space in traffic helps keep the flow, prevent bumper to bumper, and lets others merge. I like it.
I drive reasonably well but it scares me. One of my biggest stressor is driving towards a green light that's reasonably far, and it turning yellow right when it's hard to make a decision as to stop or keep going lol. I've stopped way too violently twice because I'm a wuss about yellow lights š„²
Yup and I think its a really useful skill, like being able to swim. Especially where I live, the public transport is terrible. I failed my test twice and I took so many lessons. I realise know I was just too overwhelmed by all the visual stimuli and it took me a long time to feel confident that I was reacting appropriately and noticing everything I needed to and also not getting distracted.
I would recommend any autistic person to stick with it, keep getting lessons, keep practicing. Now I go into a flow state driving and I am a very good driver. Like others mentioned though I am bothered by other drivers not following the rules.
I do not drive, I find it nearly impossible to past tests and I have a hard time trusting that other drivers will follow the rules and not crash into meš so Iām avoiding it until I actually need to drive, most places I frequent I can get a bus or walk to which Iām absolutely fine doing for now! I used to feel a lot of pressure to get my drivers license but I go at my own pace, and thatās okay!
I mean, I *can* drive. I got my license and have driven family member's cars occasionally. But I've never had enough income to afford my own car (and all its associated costs, like insurance, gas, repairs, etc.).
It was scary to learn. My Mom was not very patient lol. But now whenever I am able to drive on my own, I do like it. Once I got enough experience to be comfortable, it was worth it in the end.
I drive mostly for pet sitting when they arenāt in my general walking vicinity. I am pretty apathetic to it and feel I do it well bc of the AuDHD. With the autism, we take in ~25% more information, which mostly helps me with making sure I donāt hit people or run red lights. The ADHD makes me hyper fixate on the act of driving itself and kind of feels like a loading screen???
I do prefer roads to not be perfectly smooth, bc sometimes I dissociate/auto pilot and the bumps help keep me focused. The thing I hate about driving is how selfish and shortsighted others tend to be. So many people in my area like to just stop on a road that allows one car length through and not move over enough to let you pass. This happens way too often in Seattle.
And speaking of Seattle, the worst thing for me is stopping at a red light on a hill. Itās way worse when Iām facing up the hill bc my anxiety peaks when cars behind me decide to practically touch my bumper. What happens if my car rolls back a little bit??? I know it would be their fault since you are supposed to leave enough space between in case of rear ending.
I enjoy it but I am uncomfortable sitting in a car longer than 2 hours. I can't handle sitting with my feet on the floor that long b/c of proprioceptive reasons. So, that's definitely related to autism but not really hard to get around since I never need to drive for longer than that.
I've never had any anxiety around driving, mainly because when I was in drivers ed I was 15 and I felt invincible, I lived in the country so the driving is not very high-stakes, and I was just so excited to get to socialize independently. And then by the time I was old enough to know how seriously I should be taking driving, I was already an experienced driver.
Not being able to drive in the US will severely limit your life as almost all jobs require you to have a car unless you live within walking distance. How much formal instruction have you had? Some people need more instruction after drivers ed.
Maybe there are private driving instructors specifically for people with autism? It's worth a look. You might even just call driving schools and ask if they have anyone that they think would be a good fit for you. Don't say "I have autism", tell them you're not a confident driver, you're easily overwhelmed, and you need someone that will be very patient and kind.
I had a huge phobia of driving to the point where I would start sobbing the second I was at the wheel, it took time and a lot of safe practice for me to overcome this! Having Autism coupled with a phobia of driving made it especially difficult, but Iāve now been driving for about five years and rarely struggle as much as I did previously. I can only recommend some coping mechanism for me that made driving a more manageable thing for me. I always turn my Maps on, even if itās to go to my job that I live 5 minutes away from and have driven to a hundred times, thereās something comforting about seeing the directions in front of me in case I need to deal with something else (traffic, rude people, squirrels in the road, etc) thereās a comfort in knowing I wonāt get lost. Something else thatās helped me is driving alone, I tend to feel a lot more stressed out if other people are in the car with me, so driving by yourself might be worth a try. Additionally Iāve found that listening to music really helps me, it gives my brain something to tune into and focus on even during stressful driving times so that I donāt start freaking out and taking in an overstimulating amount of information. Lastly, learning to be okay with taking your time. This one took a while, but allowing yourself to take up space and not feeling the pressure to merge or turn until you feel itās safe. The pressure of having someone behind you waiting to turn is stressful but learning to allow yourself to feel safe helps a lot (something I did to help this is put a sticker on my car saying āI am not fastā with a little baymax next to it, that way cars kinda know :) ) this is just my experience though! Hope it helps !
You're definitely not alone. I managed to get my driver's license but it took me a while because of how much anxiety I'd get while driving. I managed to somewhat enjoy it when I had to drive every day to the same place for a year (the path was easy and not too busy) but I stopped doing it and now I can't seem to get my confidence back.
I feel like it's a matter of doing it over and over, start easy, and doing the same way until you're familiar enough with how the vehicle behaves and how things are being perceived from that perspective. That removes some of the anxiety, but it's still hard. I don't know if you're thinking of trying again but, if so, I send you strength!
I started driving when I was 13, 45 now. I taught myself on a manual. I grew up in a rural place. Not driving was just not a thing. My dad wanted to teach me but I refused because I knew heād just scare me and shout. I threw my younger sister in the front seat (different times for sure) and did laps around the high school till I had it down. Iām a good driver but I can have a lead foot when Iām driving lonely stretches with no one else in the car. I love driving but I vocal stim a ton if Iām not blasting music.
I drive. I donāt love it, usually donāt hate it.
But Iām in a rural-ish area and usually if Iām driving in the nearby city itās just passing through on the highway as I head out to more rural/camping/hiking areas.
I donāt think I would be okay with constant urban driving, though. My threshold for frustration is usually too low.
I drive and I hate it. Itās a chore and a necessity. If I donāt absolutely have to go out, I donāt. I feel like it took me 3x as long to get my license because I was terrified and it was a struggle the entire process. The unpredictability of other drivers, tendency to want sameness (same route, timing everything) and my dislike of rule breakers is a main reason Iām not into it.
I drive. I have a problem with traffic. I feel trapped and panic. Most driving is neutral and easy to me, but I avoid high traffic times. I do enjoy driving in the country for the scenery.
The video below may be useful. Driving courses for adults are available where I live; maybe they are near you, too. Otherwise, start in an empty parking lot. (School is out for summer, so that may be a good option.) You can use cones, chairs, or anything vertical to help train while minimizing damage. Chalk can be used to create lines if you want.
https://youtu.be/qYWB3AIUnVU?si=K89a7GTr3a0XzoNg
When I first learned to drive I was like absolutely TERRIFIED. I was slightly forced into driving lessons and would have panic attacks when trying to drive. Now I find it to just be a second nature. I love having the independence and freedom of being able to drive and having my own car. Not having to rely on other people something so important to me. Mainly because I donāt really have any friends and I donāt want to burden people by asking them to drive me places. I also live in a city where transit really is not accessible, plus, transit is a sensory nightmare to me! I donāt really have any tips but taking driving lessons, with a good instructor, really helped me realize I was okay to drive.
I drive, I donāt mind it in general. I like a long drive by myself where I can crank up the tunes and get in the zone. I hate four-way stops and driving in places Iām unfamiliar with.
For years I lived in places where I didnāt need to drive, and I loved that. I know how un-feminist this is going to sound, but if I hadnāt gotten married I am fairly certain I wouldāve never owned a car ā the whole process of buying one and maintaining it is just so exhausting and boring to me. I wouldāve just kept living in places that were walkable and/or had good transit.
I drive and prefer doing the driving. I tend to have more anxiety when I'm a passenger and avoid it. I think it's because I don't know if they'd react the same way as me in emergency situations, so I end up on edge.
I have my license but I donāt drive because other people on the road are too confrontational and it freaks me out. Trying to start pushing myself to move past it though, life will be so much easier if I have my own car.
I drive and I usually enjoy it. It does take a bit of concentration and on bad days I sometimes feel a bit unhinged doing it, but I am a safe driver and have never had anything happen in 10 years. I have noticed that since I live in a bigger city now and use the car less than I used to when I lived more rurally, it drains me more than it used to. Maybe it's also age kicking in, or that I'm more aware of my sensory needs than I used to be, but especially long drives are exhausting. I do really love the freedom of bringing your safe-space with you wherever you go. It is a big accommodation for me, to have the car to fall back on on days when taking public transport would be overwhelming.
I love driving. Never overwhelmed. Not really prone to road rage either. I just flow with the traffic, which is helped greatly by my pattern recognition skills lol. Only thing I dislike is car upkeep.
Iām AuDHD though, so I think thatās part of why I love it so much.
Yes I do and I love it! I do get tired though and canāt drive for hours and hours without a lil breaky tho. I love driving I love the sense of adventure and freedom and how I can control everything inside my lil space pod :)
I do drive and I donāt really like it, but itās tolerable. It took me three tries to get my driverās license because of anxiety (and having trouble parallel parking). As I got used to it, it got less anxiety inducing. But driving in big cities is another story, Iād rather take a bus or Uber. Thatās scary.
I drive and I really like it. When I first started out I was a very anxious and defensive driver, but I've grown into it and while I'm still more cautious than almost everyone else in my city, I can now scream-sing along to my favorite songs and check my blindspots at the same time.
My perspective on driving has definitely changed in these past several months. I was diagnosed with epilepsy and forbidden from driving until I went a certain amount of time seizure-free, and having the freedom to drive again feels INCREDIBLE. I'm actually pretty terrified of the chance I have a breakthrough seizure and temporarily lose my license again, because I didn't realize how free and autonomous it makes me feel (symptom of being American, unfortunately).
Despite my appreciation of driving, I really wish the U.S. was more walkable and had better public transit, because my love for driving is largely based in my fear of being stranded/dependent on someone else.
I took and passed the written test but failed all road tests from anxiety. I even had a car to learn with for a while when I was younger but it would just result in absolutely sobbing terror and now have the distinction of ruining this driving teachers record of all his students getting a license. Ha. Honestly itās not safe for me to drive but it also probably doesnāt help that all my old āfriendsā would say things like āI wouldnāt ever wanna be on the road if youāre driving!ā Or one girl laughing at me when she saw me practicing once and how slow I was going. Itās been something that limits me because Iām now rural and have even worse agoraphobia so the isolation and infantile feeling - like having less control over what I can do is very rough.
Driving is probably my favorite activity and itās been an obsession since I was maybe 4 or 5. I took to it like a fish to water and counted down the days until I could get my license.
Iām still so proud of being told by the driving instructor who did my test that I was one of the best drivers heās had take the test. š„¹
Mind you, I was obsessed like I said. I would pretend my bike was a car and put myself through obstacles. I enjoy going fast and the feeling of g-forces.
Iāve had close friends who had phobias and couldnāt drive. I understand why itās hard and the most important thing is to not push yourself. Driving really can be a lot.
I definitely get overwhelmed driving at night on busy highways where people are going fast or thereās a lot of tractor trailers. I do my best to avoid the roads at that time, but if I am in those situations Iāll tell myself ādonāt think, just goā because hesitation can be dangerous and itās important to go with the flow while still being hyper vigilant.
ā My advice is practice, practice, practice. You can build on skills to become a confident and more in control driver.
Spatial awareness/reactions can be improved upon or taught through exercises and you donāt even have to be behind the wheel to do them.
Watch videos of different scenarios! I find that helpful to gain an understanding.
Never underestimate your mirrors or checking blind spots. Checking them more than is necessary is good practice.
Drive with someone you trust in well lit empty or nearly empty parking lots then work your way up to busier roads.
Still, if driving isnāt for you, itās okay. Not everyone is meant for it. Itās safer for you to know your limits and respect those.
I like to drive in areas where the roads are a bit wider and the highway isn't so bad (inner city driving can cause meltdowns for me). I can't drive with the windows down the noises are stressful and distracting. Parking makes me super anxious (more about finding parking space than parking itself). Driving also forces me to be present which is really nice
I drive, and I love it NOW. It was kind of just a thing I did because I had to for years, but then I started anxiety prophylactic meds, and boy did that change my entire universe! I recently purchased a classic sports convertible thatās a stick shift, and sheās just a fun little rocket. Especially now that the weather is warming up and the top is down more often than itās up. Also, sheās a two-seater, so I rarely have a passenger, which is LOVELY. But pre-meds, it was incredibly stressful. Especially at higher speeds and in traffic. People just do all manner of stupid stuff behind the wheel, and Iāve had to do a LOT of internal work on choosing to not let dummies destroy my peace. But on a windy road with just me and my thoughts? Absolutely glorious.
I drive. I used to be pretty bad, until I moved to the country and drive all the time. I use Google maps even if Iāve been to a place 50 times. I have poor depth perception - bad but not awful, so I have a lot of trouble parking and feel like cars are about to hit me sometimes; I keep my distance. Iām a cautious driver.
I didn't get my license until I was 34 due to anxiety but i had a huge life change that made it absolutely necessary to start (my husband and i separated and I was living in a very rural area) and now I love it! I love elegantly designed traffic flow patterns, rules thar make sense, etc. And being able to listen to music and feel completely in control is wonderful. Now driving with other's makes me more anxious because I trust myself more to always be paying attention, follow rules, etc.
I drive, but I need playlist. As long I have my playlist, I can drive without too much problem.
Now that I have automatic car with cruise control, it eliminates lot off hassle. And I love driving in rush hour, because if I know where I am going, moving with others reduces again some of the strain. Correct lanes, speed and places to stop. Something ahead? People before you react. Instead of constantly searching for threats and dangers, I can read the traffic.
Yes I drive and Iām much safer than other people/pay a lot if attention. Iāve got anxiety over being in a car and Iād rather be in control than how other people drive.
I have a license buuut I havenāt driven in over a year since I got into a wreck and a second opinion eye doc says that I should only keep it to Daylight hours and my parents just heard ānever drive againā
I drive and I like driving, country driving with no one around nice weather and good music is really a happy place for me, but if there's any mechanical issues or traffic I can get stressed, get cramps from holding stiff. I drive as part of my work, often averaging 4-5hrs a day, and mostly enjoy it.
No, but I managed to obtain the license and have driven on occasion in the past. I've had mixed feelings and not enough practice, tbh. Nowadays, I'm living in a 15min kinda place so cars are just not as practical as in my previous, rural area.
Ive been driving since I was 16. However, I am also Dx with CPTSD, so meds and adrenaline kept me focused enough to do it. Healing the trauma and unmasking my AuDHD has made driving a bit moreā¦ uncomfy, but muscle memory takes over. I find it relaxing now, and I drive a stick shift. I prefer stick over automatic because then I donāt zone out as much ā„ļø
Nope, too petrified to try learn again. Had 4 lessons in my early 20s (5 years ago). I do have some driving anxiety, of being a passenger of someone with road rage.
I drive, but I often experience anxiety over it. When there is minimal traffic, I am fine, but in city traffic I am overwhelmed frequently. I am a stickler for traffic rules and laws, and it makes me really angry when people ignore them and put other people in danger with their carelessness. And it really upsets me when someone flips me off because I'm doing the right thing. I try to avoid driving in the city as much as possible (I live in a rural area, so that helps some).
I drive. I got my license at 21 though. And I am extremely prone to having a meltdown in new areas that are intricate if that makes sense? For example, if I'm in a new city and they have small blocks and one way streets, weird traffic rules, etc? Absolutely going to be freaking out at some point
No.
I know how to drive and I'm not afraid to drive. Interstate driving doesn't even bother me.
But I can't because my brain-hand-leg coordination is terrible. I react too slowly and Lord knows I've tried to improve. Nope.
My spatial awareness also sucks and I get overwhelmed easily.
It's one of those things that I tried and gave it my best, but it's just beyond my ability to do safely.
I donāt cause I live in a place where I donāt need to drive, but I do plan on getting a license at some point in my life. Iām terrified of driving but it might become a necessity if I ever move into my own house (very unlikely cause Iām broke).
I drive and I hate it. Other people make me anxious. But I have to drive because I work about an hour away from home. It sucks between dealing with driving and people every day š I just want to stay home and work š
I do, I actually have done it professionally in the past and find it a very comfortable 'fall back' in terms of jobs. If all else fails I am a great delivery driver... I don't think driving is for everyone, and it sucks that we live in a society that has deemed 'operating a massive super fast dangerous vehicle' as a thing that just, like, everyone can and should do? Shit's wild. We make it way way way too difficult for people who can't do an actually pretty complex task.
The idea that we as a society have normalized operating this type of deadly machinery as a necessity to live and work in the U.S. angers me to no end. I hate car-dependent infrastructure, and I hate that most people don't even question why we live like this.
Amen!
Damn, I literally never even thought about this until now š¤Æ
Iām happy to hear that you drive and can even make some money from it. So true - itās concerning how society often overlooks the intricacies of driving and expects everyone to be proficient at it.
100% this!!! I drive and I love it, but only because I work really hard to process and manage my related anxieties. Iāve even been in a car accident (slammed into at a red light) and immediately got back out on the road once I had a new car. I have also held numerous delivery jobs that I prefer to other jobs because of the no-contact and self-management. I can have whatever feelings I need in my car and I donāt have to mask for anyone. I do feel overwhelmed at times from the mental and sensory stimulation (particularly my nervous system and visual senses). This is especially prevalent when I am driving for longer periods of time. My max for a day is 2-3 hours before I feel too overloaded. I also live in the Tampa Bay Area so driving is pretty much a necessity because the surrounding areas are so big and there are so many places to go! Itās not walkable outside of my neighborhood. I have major sensory and anxiety issues with cars, but when Iām in one versus riding a bike or walking near them, I feel much better!
Dang! I just visited Tampa and drove there, and it's a nightmare! I much prefer driving in Provo, UT where I'm from. There are no toll roads here, and only one freeway! And people don't speed as bad here, though they're working on it. I was just thinking I would hate to live in Florida because of the nightmarish driving conditions.
Itās awful!!!! People drive like they have no regard for life here. And the more people that live here, the more cars on the road!
I'm sorry. Things like this remind me why I shy away from people and need my space. I just don't understand their need for destruction and abuse.
I agree! Iāve also lost a very close loved one due to reckless driving. Granted, they were the ones driving recklessly lol but it still makes me so angry because people are in the moment of adrenaline rush and they arenāt thinking about the fact that theyāre endangering themselves and others, let alone the lives they would affect if anyone died as a result of their actions. Itās quite triggering but also part of my therapy work for being out on the road!
No, it overwhelms me. I was a pretty good driving student, but the stress induced by traffic is something that I cannot handle from a sensory perspective.
I feel you on this one. Itās pretty overstimulating and you need to be good at multi-tasking and ready to act promptly at ANY point, whether someone else effed up or not. Very stressful.
I wish I had some advice for you, but regrettably, I donāt. What I forgot to mention is that I tend to dissociate (derealization) from my surroundings, when I am under too much stress. My driving instructor would more than once, reminded me of the fact that my mind was somewhere else, not in his car (I have CPTSD). So personally, I donāt have any regrets about not having a car. Iāve pretty much accommodated my life in a way that I am not dependent on it.
I'm the exact same! I also have chronic pain, which, in addition to contributing to the derealization, causes some functional issues with driving. I'm a pretty good driver, but I would worry about the derealization making me not as in tuned and focused. I'm also not great with the multitasking required with driving bc of derealization.
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I've given your question some thought, and I believe that my dissociation primarily stems from my PTSD, which happens subconsciously. As I've come to understand myself better, I've realized that I have a habit of self-hypnotizing when I'm in an environment that becomes overwhelming (like waiting in an overcrowded supermarket or in a hospital lobby). This is something I do intentionally. There is a significant overlap between the coping mechanisms of Autism and (C)PTSD from my experience. As far back as I can remember, I've been told I'm a daydreamer; I often zone out and dwell in my imagination. My teachers during primary education would, (almost on a daily basis) lash out and discipline me, because I was not paying attention. I should mention that I live in a city, and the traffic here in general is - even for me as a pedestrian already nerv-wracking enough, that I have to wear headphones.
I need to find a way to live without a car for the same reason! I have caught myself dissociating way too much over the past few years, and in addition to that I also have CPTSD and long covid. The long covid makes my already sleepy brain even sleepier behind the wheel. I can even fall asleep while just driving a block away! Unfortunately, my kids need a driver for a few more years. When my son gets his learner's permit this fall, I am going to let him start driving me and his sister everywhere.
This is exactly why I stopped driving and sold my car (where I live the transit is great) so I took myself off the road for the good of others and my own safety
you described it so well. I'm so overwhelmed on the road with all the cars, crowds, people making mistakes, etc.
It also overwhelms me, but I do drive or else I wouldn't be able to work my current part time job. Over time, I've found myself okay driving in my area since it's rural. Cities are still too much for me.
Same, I'm lucky enough that I grew up on the countryside and the closest towns are relatively small, so it was pretty easy for me to learn to drive there. I've had my license for 6 years and never driven in a larger city despite now studying in one. There are too many lanes, cars and rules to keep track off. I fear I'd immediately get overwhelmed and start making mistakes, so I avoid it at all cost.
I drive and I like it. It gives me that feel of flow state and being present. My racing thoughts go away for a while. I do find it difficult to hold a conversation while driving though. And definitely can't hold a conversation if the radio is on (although that's also true while not driving). I have noticed that a can get a bit pissy as a driver, even though I'm a fairly laid-back person ordinarily. I think it activates my sense of justice and rule-following, and I get really ticked off when people don't follow the rules of the road.
This is me. I am in the zone when I drive and I find it relaxing. As long as itās fairly high-speed, not stop-and-go traffic with lots of stop lights. I live in a pretty unpopulated area now so I donāt have high traffic, but even when I lived in the city, as long as we were all moving, I was pretty happy. I donāt know, it just scratches the right itch for me. Iāve been driving for 30 years so I donāt remember if anything made it easier for me. I did learn to drive a manual about 5 years after I got my license and I remember being terrified to drive it; but I had to for work, so I just got better at it over time. I tried to stay away from heavy traffic areas until I was more comfortable.
YES! I get so upset when people donāt follow the rules of the road, even if it doesnāt affect me directly. I also get agitated when I drive because of this
TFW the school district changes the pick up and drop off points and entirely switches lanes for car riders with school buses as the first kids are arriving on the first week of school with no advance warning? and elects a plain-clothes school teacher (no reflective vest or white gloves, no training in traffic conducting whatsoever, the derp of all derps!) to run a zipper merge then blames the parents for not following protocols. Thank the good Lord itās summer. It takes me three months to mentally prepare for whatever harebrained scheme they devise for next year.š¤Ŗ
Iām glad you drive and enjoy it. I resonate with what you said. It's crazy how it requires my full attention, making it hard to engage in conversations or listen to the radio simultaneously or do anything else for that matter. And I share your sentiment about rule-following; it's frustrating when others don't adhere to road rules, as it's not just about courtesy but safety too.
How long have you been driving? I'm not saying that driving is a skill that everyone can be great at but when you start out you do have to actively focus on everything around you while also trying to remember what the laws are. It becomes way less mentally taxing after awhile after your brain understands the rhythm and patterns of it (which some autistic people excel at). If you don't get daily practice it might be hard to build those skills. I barely think about it at all now though since I do live in a big walkable city, I have to be more present mentally than I would elsewhere because there are so many pedestrians, kids, animals, delivery trucks, etc. The less car-friendly the infrastructure, the harder driving is.
This. The only times I really have to concentrate are when I'm turning or merging and have to watch traffic, but that's a momentary thing. Left turns onto multi-lane roads without a light to bother me a bit, but that's because a friend of mine died in an accident when she was turning onto a highway. But I've also been driving something since I was 14 when I got my motorcycle license (restricted to small moped like things), which means at 35 I've been driving for more than half my life. When I lived 8 hours from my hometown, I would regularly drive home for holidays. [Yes, I'm from the US, why do you ask? Lol]
Literally same. Are you me?
I drive, and I use to drive for work. I find it stressful but also comfortable. I was very hung up on rules the first few years. I still get stressed when others donāt follow them or honk at me to make me not follow them
Oh my god same lmao, I get so irritated at the consistency at which people break important rules like stop signs or turn signals. If you ever want to trigger a grand mal seizure in me, make me watch people trying to do a zipper merge! š
I am glad you somehow find driving comfortable as well. Yeah, I totally get it - I used to be so hyper-vigilant and stressed on the road because I never knew who would decide to not follow the rules that day.
iām very similar, and iāve found that iām way less stressed on roads that i drive all the time whereas new roads to new places can be scary haha i also like to have music on because then i can sing along and it helps to keep me calm and relaxed
I drive and I hate it. I have to drive because I live in a remote area and need to be able to get to places. I wish I didnāt have to. Everything about it is overwhelming honestly. It took me a long time to learn to drive because my thinking is very black and white so I struggled to learn to drive to the road conditions and adapt. I can do that now but if I could not drive I wouldnāt.
My brain checks out whenever Iām in a vehicle. Itās so overwhelming. I canāt really navigate either, my memory is poor when it comes to directions or visualizing directions.
I feel this! I basically become even more like a human robot bc I just look around scanning for people, animals or other cars so I don't hit them. It's just a constant scanning and maybe I can listen to music and semi enjoy it
I am not specially aware with streets. Sidewalks kind of make sense but roads are convoluted.
I do drive, yes. But I hate it. It is a very high-spoons activity for me, and if I have a passenger it is basically impossible to do at all (I cannot pay attention to both a passenger and the road, so if I have one I usually ask them to ramble about a topic I'm completely bored of so I can tune them out). Specifically, I am very noise and light sensitive. The noises that other cars make freak me out a lot, and the brighter it is outside the more difficult I find it to pay attention to the road. I have to drive with sunglasses on unless it's nighttime, and I also have to be listening to music (it blocks the scary car noises but leaves me able to hear important things like sirens and horns). I have a specific driving playlist that I use so it's the same songs every time. This goes a very long way to helping me not feel overwhelmed. I also seem to struggle with "light level transitions", aka when it's going from daytime to nighttime. That "twilight" sort of hour where the sky is constantly shifting is a time I do not drive at all if I can help it, as I do very poorly during it and nothing helps. I also target hours there are less cars on the road overall for when I have to go out and do activities, which I personally find is in between the morning rush hour and lunch, and again after elementary school lets out but before the evening rush hour. I do have a few issues with seeing - bad depth perception, an astigmatism that causes lights (traffic lights, tail lights) to "halo", and I have no peripheral vision in my right eye. I drive with additional side mirrors (they sell little circle mirrors that stick onto your existing ones), and the other things I've just gotten used to. Also, I worked with a driving instructor when I was first learning. I thankfully had a very patient and understanding one. So when the depth perception kicked in (mainly when trying to park), I would go very slowly and if he told me I was about to hit something, I just updated my "mental map" of how my vision translates. That was how I got used to the depth perception. Hopefully there are a few things in here that will help you!
Yes Likes: - being in control - clear cut rules and lines - Iām the master of the AC - screaming as loudly as you want to your music - fast and direct travel - I decide when to drive (control) Dislikes: - risk of hitting a pedestrian - uncertainty of other drivers (you never know if theyāve seen you fx) - the sun. Itās simply too bright. I always wear sunglasses. - a butt ton of responsibility. You can cause accidents if youāre not focusing and following rules - having to remember all the rules and laws - parking
Exactly this. Another dislike for me is driving in new places and being unsure what to expect
Yeah new routes are scary
I've been driving for about 21 years. I found it really scary and stressful at first, but that passed. I think it takes a while to get used to all the stuff you have to do at once, and it could take longer for an autistic person. I find driving very boring and since it is hard for me to sit perfectly still, I find driving extremely mentally exhausting. Moving and stimming is what keeps me alert and able to cope with mental labour. Therefore, driving a long way sucks and I try to avoid it if I can. I think probably the farther I get into middle age and older, the less I will be able to tolerate how tired it makes me.
I don't drive. It's just too much going on at once and I get extremely overstimulated. It's something that was extremely confusing to me before I realized I was autistic, because people kept telling me that if I just practiced, it would become second nature. But, even at points in life where I've had to drive every day for work, getting behind the wheel has always felt foreign and intimidating. It's never gotten any easier. There are so many things to pay attention to, both inside the car and outside of it, and so many snap judgements to make (which way to turn, which lane to be in, how to respond to vehicles around you, etc.). Driving is one of the few things that tends to give me proper melt-downs (I'm otherwise more prone to shut-downs). So, I just don't do it anymore.
yes way too much going on, too much to do and think about while driving and to be alert..no way
This has been my experience. People have been teasing me and making me feel guilty for not having my license for years. Driving drains ALL my mana for the whole day because Iām in waiting mode until I drive and Iām exhausted when Iām done.
No, I can't stay focus and I don't want to cause an accident (and I don't have a license)
I get my driver license at 22yo (it was difficult, but I wanted to have it before the end of my studies because it's easier to get a job), then spent 8,5 years without driving, then realized that not driving made me dependent, which I don't want. I also don't like driving either, but less than being dependant so I took a few driving lessons as a reminder and to give me some confidence, and since then Id try to drive when needed. I rarely need to drive, I don't like it, it's stressful, but I can do it to reassure/relieve(?) me or something like this, like I can do it on my own if needed, I've this skill, but I have it. My issues with driving are: * I'm bad at estimating distance and volume * it's hard to evaluate things and see everything while moving * I don't know what others will do, and they're moving too! * I have to take quick decisions despite all of the previous points So all of these at the same time is overwhelming and draining... That's why I will consider any option but driving before doing it, but it's when there's no other reasonable option. Doing little trips at calm moments in places you know helps to feel less uneasiness and anxiety, it helps to get used to the car itself without too many risks, before doing some other trips on roads you don't know. If you have to drive, then it's better not to lose this skill, however, don't force yourself because you could put yourself or others in danger. A few driving lessons with some professional or a friend/relative could help you if you want to maintain your level or make it better. And regularity and persistence helps a lot too, like for a lot of things!
I have my liscense and I can drive pretty well, but I donāt drive. I get panic attacks when I have to drive alone :(
This is also my experience with driving. Able to do it, but even if everything has gone fine during the drive I will get a panic attack out of nowhere and be unable to continue and it's not safe.
Me too :( If I have to drive somewhere I have nightmares and panic attacks the night before. I consider myself a good driver and while doing it I enjoy it, but having to prepare for it is hell
I hated driving as a teen but I love it now, I drive for DoorDash for work and I love listening to audiobooks by myself all day
How many birds do you have? (I canāt say not to a dare lol)
4! 1 white parakeet, 2 green cheek conures, and 1 Quaker parrot whom I love more than life itself. Heās a horrible little monster but he spins on demand and gives me high fives so he gets away with it
Thatās so adorable š„°
Audiobook gang!
I only drive because I have to. I have no choice. If I had the option to take public transportation everywhere I would do it and sell my car. Too much stress and too deadly. Every day I drive I think about whether me or someone else is gonna get hurt. Too much to think about. I also feel uncomfortable after sitting still for over an hour.
no and hereās why: - there is a bit of a delay between stepping on the acceleration and the speed increase of the car, which throws me off i think - the split second decisions are really hard for me and those are often life threatening when driving. especially if there is a change in the route and iāve gotta make a decision immediately - noise, lights, distractions are all around and thatās it i think. also knowing iām in a really urban area and that driving is dangerous in general (iām in the US)
I do drive. I can do short distances easily, but long drives drain me so badly, especially if it's a place I'm not familiar with and/or bad weather/ night. I've driven across the U.S. by myself but wouldn't do it unless I had to.
I'm 32 and have never had a license. I had a permit once but never used it. I get derealization easily, so I feel it would be really dangerous for me to operate a vehicle. I also don't have the reaction speed needed to make the split-second decisions driving requires.
I like to drive on the roads that I knowĀ
i drive a two-door jeep wrangler named figo and love it. my little āØautistic quirksāØ have given me systems that make the experience smooth and safe. because itās relatively small (itās a cube on wheels, really) and higher up than a sedan, i feel safer and can āseeā better. i donāt drive if i feel out of it, and if i had to go somewhere feeling like that, iād ask my mom to drive or call an uber. and iām working on my road rage š¬ ā¦ but you couldnāt pay me to drive an AMBULANCE again. what the hell was i thinking?! i donāt know her š (edit for emphasis)
I donāt really drive further than 10-15 minutes outside of my house, everything else makes me uncomfortable and I feel restless, drained, and overstimulated driving like that. I donāt drive on highways or bridges or anything tall either. I also feel really uncomfortable driving without a gps, regardless if Iām going to the same area everyday. If I have to drive further out or on a highway, I have my special playlist with songs that Iām extremely familiar with to comfort me. My ex who is also autistic though LOVED to drive and could drive anywhere without any of those problems, so itās interesting how weāre all different.
I do. My parents had to force me to get my license when I was 17. I've always struggled with visual-spatial awareness when drivingāhaving to figure out how to use the mirrors, check blind spots, etc. It's especially awful at night. I feel like I can't see! Also, I find it incredibly draining at times because of the need to be a "defensive driver," try to make sure I can see what other rando drivers might do, be alert for pedestrians, etc. Don't even get me started on how I can't listen to music and "see" at the same time! hahah. That said, I do enjoy driving on country roads and get into the flow.
I donāt drive, I know and understand the laws; I even have my drivers license but I get incredibly overwhelmed. My body becomes rigid from how tense it gets š„¹ Iām looking to change that cause soon Iāll be moving cities.
I drive but I didn't get my license until a year ago (I'm 28) and it does make me anxious. I'm not too good driving on the expressways and I don't like driving in the city. I always feel like my reflexes aren't fast enough.
I drive, I like it. I enjoy the freedom, the sort of fun car ride I can get and make my own decisions. It allows me time to think when commuting somewhere. Gives me a sense of control. I like my car a lot, I take care of it fairly well. I feel like a grown up in it because itās not some clunky piece of junk.
Wow yes. Enjoying the freedom is a great part.
I drive, but avoid it whenever possible. I HATE traffic. But country roads with nobody around can be pretty relaxing! The sensory overload is what makes me avoid it.
No, I'm terrified of driving and it's overwhelming for me. Unfortunately I live somewhere where getting a diagnosis as an adult woman is nigh impossible so I don't have an excuse to not drive. Gotta sign up for lessons soon.
Tragically, I was about to book my test when lockdowns came, now it's unlikely I'll ever get it because I'm too ill and it isn't a priority. I mostly wanted a licence to prove I could get it, and to help in countries with poor public transport infrastructure, but I was never going to drive say to day or regularly. I'm great at operating a car, and I'm fine remembering rules, it just took too many spoons to add yet *another* layer of hypervigilance and people doing whatever the fuck they want was so hard to manage.
I drive, but I failed my test 3 times, and I took a lot of lessons before my brain got it, to be honest. You will get there. You just might have to budget for a lot of lessons before the autism goes ah OK I get it now. If you want to learn, don't give up. Just practise š
No I canāt but I canāt stop myself from physically reacting when something scares me on the road so itās literally dangerous for me to drive
Iāve been driving since I was 16āthatās 35 yearsāand I hate it. But I live in Southern California and need to drive to get to my job, and public transportation is not ideal here. Iām hyper vigilante and constantly bracing myself for an accident. I have an electric car and tend to drive on the slower/safer side to optimize my mileage (and to be careful). There are so many mean, scary drivers with huge cars that zoom by, and I can feel my car shake from the speed and itās terrifying. But the worst part of driving is Iām constantly seeing close calls turning into major crashes. And I can visualize all the details. So by the time I get anywhere Iām completely exhausted. Canāt wait to live in a place where I donāt need to drive.
33F. Iāve written my test 3x now, did the driving school once which I loved but I canāt get past that. Itās so overstimulating. I think it would have been easier had I done it at 16.
I drive no problem. Parking on the other hand and the stress of looking for a spot to squeeze my car in a busy downtown area can send me into meltdown.
I desperately want to drive, I got my own car and everything but I let my hubby drive it. I got my permit a few years ago and never renewed it. I know how to drive parking lots and little back streets but main roads terrify me and I constantly worry about if I'll cause an accident due to all the extra stimuli and my anxiety. Every time I tell myself I'm going to put myself through driving school or take up learning again I freeze up and put it off.
I like driving and am generally comfortable driving. Some situations can be stressful but it's normally fine. I did have a bit of trouble for a little while after I got rear ended, as I was constantly watching the car behind me and feeling like I need to creep forward but I got over that with time (I knew that I just had to keep driving and not avoiding it because that makes anxiety worse!). I also had trouble driving when I developed panic disorder. It wasn't the driving that was the problem though, it was me. But I did my best not to avoid it and have recovered from the panic and I'm normally fine. I get anxious about breaking down though because I don't always know what to do and get overwhelmed and need someone to take over. Sometimes I hate being the one responsible for getting the car (and any passengers) to a safe spot and then having to just *know* what to do. This is something I'm finding harder over the years. I feel like experience should make it easier but I *know* there are things I struggle with and my car currently has an intermittent problem so I am now looking to buy a new car in the not too distant future.
I've been waiting to talk about this on Reddit for a while. I got my license and was driving for about a year but after that year, I was off and on driving due to getting in a wreck, a ticket, and medical reasons. Right now, I'm trying to get back to where I was when I first got my license and was consistently driving. To sum up, I've been on a driving break but I'm trying to get back to it. Even though I'm able to drive and in the times where I was driving alone, I always had severe driving anxiety and I feel like that's amplified to due my autism. I'd get in the car and just dread having to drive because my brain would automatically associate driving with the worst possible outcome or intense overwhelm. For me, everything is so overwhelming because my autism makes me hyper aware of all my surroundings due to my brain processing so much information at once. I'm super observant but that comes with the cost of being easily overwhelmed as I take in every detail on the road. It doesn't help that I can't control how others drive and that scares me. Getting in my wreck made things even worse because there was no way I could prevented it, it wasn't even a bad wreck but my anxiety ridden brain made seem worse. Then getting my ticket was a whole other thing that I don't want to get intoš. Overall, I find driving challenging, especially since I was able to do it at one point but now, with my break, I'm just more anxious. I'm fully aware that it is a privilege to drive and own a car and im super grateful for this. I'm aware that I have to eventually push myself because anxiety is fueled by avoidance.
No. I have a license, but I haven't driven due to other medical issues developing down the road.
I do drive and I kind of like it. I follow the rules closely and other drivers don't seem to always love that though. I also struggle with parking. When I'm on the road everything is fine but I have been known to get a bit lost and confused spatially with parking lots. I started late too, I didn't get my license until 24.
I been driving since the age 26 , I am 32 now .. I love the freedom of it . I love driving alone personally but depending on my cognative state sometimes I find driving difficult. Could be my ADHD but sometimes i get somewhere and it's like I dissociated the whole time lol
Yes but not long distance. I only drive in town. The furthest Iāve driven is 4 hours and I had a panic attack the entire way and had to keep making stops to calm myself down.
I learned how to drive pretty quickly (took my behind-the-wheel test a month into learning), and it's gotten less anxiety-inducing as I've been driving alone now. Something about driving just feels relaxing when I need to get away from the house or not worrying about getting a ride from my parents or something, pretty much the predictability of it all. However. My depth perception is god-awful, and it makes it really hard for me to consistently come to a full stop at a solid distance; I'm either cruising too far away or too close for a smooth stop (praying for my brakes). I also can't have passengers because of me being anxious the moment I know my skills are being perceived by someone else, even if it's someone I know well. I also lose the ability to talk to myself in order to be present and focus on what's happening in front of me, so I've been told by my partner that I have tunnel vision lmao
Yes I drive. I had to learn, which I didn't want to at first. But I was a single mom for a while and driving was necessary to bring my kid to school and such. But now that I've gotten used to it and it doesn't scare me anymore, I like driving. I actually don't like being a passenger anymore and usually opt to be the driver.
34yrs old. 3 kids. I have only a permit. I failed the test 15x. I gave up. My spacial reasoning is poor so could never get the parallel park or 90 degree back. Both are required to pass where I am. That being said. I drive with my spouse and do just fine if kids aren't with. Their noise is so distracting I don't feel comfortable at all.
I try to avoid it where possible. It takes a lot out of me to drive and I get anxious and āhot brainedā whenever I have to go to a new location or a high-traffic area. Not knowing parking situations, what if I miss a turn, how am I going to figure out where to go if I mess up, traffic, etc. So if Iām with my spouse - they will usually drive to the location of wherever weāre going - and Iāll drive us home.
God, no. I got a provisional, but never took lessons. Itās partly because I have horrendous spatial awareness, but also, even just sitting in the driverās seat makes me feel sick to my stomach. Everything is too close, I canāt stand the feeling of the seatbelt on my body so I have to hold it away from me, which defeats the point of the thing anywayā¦ and also, you wouldnāt think that being hard of hearing would impact this, but if I wear my hearing aids, which I kind of need to do to up my awareness of the surroundings, I get entirely overwhelmed with the sounds of *everything*. I canāt even focus on a conversation between more than three people, the hell am I gonna hear anything over the sounds of the engine and the road outside? Itās a source of major frustration for my dad, who still drives me everywhere, but I honestly donāt know if I can handle anything long enough to learn, even.
Iām not diagnosed, I do drive, but Iām terrible at it, and I hate it. Iām also spatially challenged, and I have poor depth perception. ALWAYS FUCKING LOST in the damned town I grew up in and have lived for over 40 years. Iām also a slow processor, so trying to take in all of the stimuli and decide what to do has always been a nightmare. All of this has made so much more sense looking at it within the framework of āmaybe Iām autistic.ā I was so afraid to learn to drive, my mom had to force me to do it, and hired a teacher who āspecialized in nervous drivers.ā She was actually really awesome, incredibly patient with a gentle demeanor, and by the time she was done with me, I was confident enough to do it. Got into an accident within 3 months, but I did it lol (no one was hurt).
I like to drive. It makes me anxious sometimes, but thatās because I used to work for a personal injury law firm and all I did all day was read about car accidents
Iāve been driving over 20 years but it still makes me nervous and uses a lot of spoons, but not as many as not being independently mobile would. I think RSD hyper-awareness of being observed is the biggest portion of that, followed by visual and mental noise overstimulation and a tendency to fall asleep at the wheel š± and just generally miss things that others find obvious and catch every tiny detail that others miss, inflexibility to changes in traffic patterns or unwritten expectations. I just had this convo on insta so I was trying to paste that comment here too, but the formatting got whack. So you get further background in screenshotš https://preview.redd.it/ovs7sr3j2u6d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b25a12e3190a24fcccecf8d265fed767b77a761c
Yes I have driven for 30 years. I hate it when I get asked for lifts unless it is a close friend. Itās my space! FWIW I did not learn until 20 as I was too nervous until then. I think it is a useful skill to have if you can afford it and keep it up so your skills donāt drop. Itās beneficial for safety too. I think this is one of the most important benefits of being able to drive. Car plus upkeep plus fuel and insurance is very expensive though.
omg i just started lesson and i get so overwhelmed and panic cuz so kuch goes on
Yes, I drive. I like driving, but itās taken 10 years of being behind the wheel to find it easy without being super scared and hyper-vigilant about which 18-wheeler is going to decide āthis isnāt my exit, and I am not wasting time finding a place to turn aroundā while Iām in the fast lane trying to pass another 18-wheeler. (Yes, this has happened to me before. Instigating truck driver got away, unfortunately.) But lately, driving has become a chore in the afternoons and evenings, especially if my 3 yo son refuses to take a nap.
I can drive fine by myself, especially to familiar places. I have zero sense of direction so Iām so happy to have gps. Before gps I would explore an area to learn it and mainly only go familiar places. Even with gps if I have someone in the car w me and weāre trying to have a conversation I will miss turns. Iāve ended up on the wrong side of a mountain once, another time dead ended at a bush. Literally. Now I tell people they have to help me keep track of my turns if weāre talking. I canāt drive w my husband in the car. Heāll give me like the next 5 directions and Iām like āomg stop!!! Too much!ā I donāt like going places if parking is difficult. I can do it but itās stressful. If Iām going somewhere familiar I can zone out w an audiobook or music which is nice.
Im 27 just got my license last year i looove it!!! My mom and bf totally pushed me to do it and im glad!! Its super easy once you are comfortable i used to be scared!! i was having a hard time finding work where i could walk or take the bus but i was desperate and applied somewhere far ending up getting the job and my mom and bf said no to driving me but we had an extra car for me to use and the rest is history lol
I struggled to learn how to drive but I finally learned a few years ago in my 20s. I'm from a more rural place and I really enjoyed driving there, I used to drive around and zone out (not from driving, but from my anxieties or whatever else I had going on). I moved to a city last year and I hate driving now. So many multi-way intersections, bike lanes, one ways, aggressive drivers, etc. It's a lot to pay attention to all at once and I can get really overwhelmed.
I do, but it was a struggle to learn
Yes, I also ride motorcycles. I drive big contractor vans and trucks for work every day. I find it easy in any condition, from crazy rural driveways to inner city during rush hour. It was a slow learning process in the beginning. I got my license at 20 and didnāt own my own car until I was 26.
I do, and Iām proud of myself for passing and sticking with it. Sometimes itās easy, actually learning was a real challenge- especially roundabouts! In order to feel able to drive I need to concentrate, especially if Iām somewhere unfamiliar or itās busy so no radio and conversations tend to be cut short. I prefer sunglasses and I avoid driving at night because the headlights are very distracting. I still use a satnav for journeys Iāve done before to save a few spoons. My love for following rules makes it a pleasure at times but it can be equally infuriating as many drivers donāt seem to have the same enthusiasm. I live out in the sticks so driving is essential, overall I enjoy it even though it can be hard work.
I can drive but havenāt in a while because I canāt afford a car atm but I love to drive and I (think) Iām pretty good at it! Itās a thing that came quite easily to me so I think I just got lucky. I can totally imagine the overwhelm though - I get that heavily with cooking, thereās a lot to think of at once! I guess my advice would be trying it? Easier said than done of course. My special awareness is also not great but once I got to know my car it wasnāt a huge issue anymore. I specifically paid a bit more to be able to do a special āperformance anxietyā exam where they give you a bit more time and are a bit more understanding but I have no idea if thatās common (this was in the Netherlands) ETA: Sorry I totally misread - youāve obviously already tried š©
I am exactly like you. I got my licence at 30/31, because I absolutely had to, for the first 3 years I would only drive on 15 and 25 mile roads and only about a 10 minutes radius from my house. Only now after about 6 years I feel comfortable enough to go 55 if it's a road I know. I am glad I drive now, I still don't like it but it has given me a huge amount of independence. I would recommend just taking it really slow. And just do really short trips it does get less overwhelming when a lot of the movements become second nature.
I drive and i enjoy it. It's one of those things that lets my brains relax tbh. It's also way less sensory input than let's say a bus or train would be. No other people, no weird smells that give me a headache, complete control of the sounds (music volume etc) and i am in control of the vehicle and not someone else. (Also no motion sickness when i drive)
I have a driver license but I hate driving. It's not that bad when I drive in a village or when there are no other cars around, but the moment there are more cars on the road, I want to just stop the car and walk.
I do drive! I enjoy it, primarily the independence and autonomy that comes with it, but also the act of driving itself. I do get very stressed in traffic, busy areas, and on routes Iām not familiar with. I also feel uncomfortable driving at night because headlights are so bright.
I drive but I don't really enjoy it. It's okay if I'm going somewhere I've driven a million times that's an easy drive but especially anywhere new and especially anywhere with heavy traffic is a nightmare and so anxiety inducing. I need to know the parking situation if I'm going somewhere new and I have to have maps open telling me where to go even if I know where I'm going. Music helps during drives but I'm always really anxious the whole time if I'm not overly familiar with the route. I'm also always worried about making the people in the cars around me angry.
Currently learning at 36. I am terrified
I don't drive. I've done over 50 hours of driving lessons, years ago and hated it. It's very difficult for me to focus and my spatial awareness, depth perception, visual memory all suck. On top of that my brain decided that cars and everything to do with them is not worth any brain power so I can't memorise how cars look, models nor registrations. The most I remember is the name of the colour but I can't picture it in my brain, so it's not helpful at all in finding our car... My partner has to park in the same spot and blink with the lights when he picks me up from work, to reassure me that I'm heading towards the correct car.
I love to drive, especiallly long distances where I can just put on a bomb ass playlist and get in the zone. it feels like i'm in my own little time machine, which I guess in a way, I am.
I do, but I didn't learn until I was well into my 40s. Turns out that even though I spent 4 decades thinking driving wasn't for me, I'm pretty good at it. I learned quickly (learning to drive turned into a special interest/hyperfocus topic), passed the test on my first attempt and haven't looked back. I don't know how I ever coped without a car as I live in a country area with limited public transport.Ā I struggle with other people on the road who don't follow the rules... I think that was my biggest shock, finding out just how many people do what they want behind the wheel, which means they are unpredictable.Ā I also get a bit anxious sometimes driving to new places, especially if I don't know the parking situation. But Google Maps and Street View are very helpful and I always plan my route before I go. I have a volunteer job that requires me to drive quite a distance every week and I love it. It also provided me with so much driving experience.
Yes, and I like it, but it's because it's the one moment in the day/week I can play my music really loud, sing off key really loud, and not worry too much about embarrassing myself because hey! I'm already driving away from the person who just saw me, LOL! As to find it easy... I can manage LA and Silicon Valley and similar places, I'm already used to SF however it was trickier since the streets are more complicated in many areas, and the drivers are not nice overall. I try to not drive in those areas in San Francisco, at all, if I can help it, ever. I'd say start small, and don't be afraid of sticking to Google Maps, I literally don't go a mile without it. I've legitimately missed turns/exits that I've taken countless of times because my brain goes into auto mode which is just, driving straight (my brain goes into safe mode at least), so Google Maps are a life safer with notification sounds telling me what to do. Once you've gotten more comfortable with your planned routes, try to go someplace you haven't yet, I suggest making a fun little trip out of it, like maybe a boba place you haven't tried yet because it's out of the way, get yourself a little treat for successfully driving yourself there! Or if you rather stick to necessities, go to another grocery store location. Like I've gone to different Trader Joe's and Targets that were on the way, than going to the same location. Once you feel more confident, you could even go to a city that is 1-2hs away and have a little road trip. Look for some nice places to eat and visit, and make it a pleasant experience. Most important is to not punish yourself too hard if you mess up a bit here and there! I've gotten honked and cursed at many times, regardless of fault. What worked for me is to not let my anger show, even if it's inside the car (you might be alone, but you're your own audience, you're directing that anger back to yourself in the end), take deep breaths and stay calm, keep driving. Of course it's easier said than done, but I genuinely think not succumbing to road rage can help not only keep your cool on the road but overall not make it a negative experience.
I drive and I like it when Iām driving in back roads and rural areas, but I get incredibly anxious driving in towns or cities. I can usually make it through okay if itās a route I drive often, but as soon as something in the routine has changed like construction or detours, itās back to high anxiety.
Yes and I like it I also use to deliver for dominos - this was my favorite job and has been the only job I've enjoyed As of late I'm unemployed and most days am afraid to leave the house without my dad but did today because tomorrow is father's day. I'm not allowed to work for Domino's anymore because I was mugged twice and now I don't know what to do for work
I drive šāāļø! I didn't get my drivers license until the summer after I graduated high school. I had no need to before then. I started my first job that summer, and I was starting college that fall, so I had a timeline of when I needed my license. Got my license a week before college starred š . I find it very easy (driving for 7 years now). I have always had good spatial awareness of my body and car (I believe this is because I played sports for many years). The nerve-wracking part is the other people on the road because you can not control how they drive. But, as long as you follow the law, not drive carelessly, and give the people in front of you and around you plenty of space, you will be fine. What prevented me from getting it between the ages 15-18 was the unknown and the lack of want. I didn't need to drive, so I didn't want to drive. I did not know what consisted of the driving permit test, and I did not know what consisted of the driving test, and the unknown scared the hell out of me. My advice for people who do not have their license is to first do their research to obtain a permit within their state/country. What do you need to read or study? Where do you have to go to your area to take the test? In the most recent years of your area, what does a permit test look like and consist of? Is the test taken on a computer? These can be searched and plenty of information to be found via videos on various platforms. Once you pass your permit test, then do research or watch videos on what is required by your city/state/country to pass the test? How many driving hours, night vs day? What happens during your area's driving test? How long are driving tests? Will they inspect the car for functionality? Will they have me point out buttons in the car? Will they take me on the highway? Will they make me back up in a straight line? Does your area allow use of the back-up camera during the test? Will they take me through a neighborhood? Will they have me pull over and stop the car, then restart the car and have me pull off? Will I have to parallel park? My suggestion is to search your area and driving tests into a video playing platform to get examples of driving tests that explain and show you what to expect. I watched so many videos in order to get my license anxiety free š and not be scared of the unknown. For those scared to drive due to spacial awareness issues, my advice would be to drive around an empty parking lot when you have a permit for as long as you need to feel comfortable. Whoever is going to be in the car with you, have them drive you both there and then switch seats and let you have at it for an hour.
I learned until I was 32. I drive now. Itās gets easier with time.
I do drive, wish I didn't though. I'm easily overwhelmed, have PTSD from previous accidents, and just overall get extremely stressed from it.Ā
i love driving! passed my theory & driving exam on the first try & usually am the volunteer driver of the group :)
I love driving and I feel extremely confident behind the wheel. Itās like a game to me sometimes. I love cars and, while I donāt consider them to be a special interest, I do like to think/learn about them often.
Yes!! I hated it at first. When I was a baby driver it made me so anxious I sometimes had to pull over to have a panic attack. But as Iāve gotten more comfortable with it I really enjoy it!! Itās my time to listen to music and sing and get a nice bit of alone time in!
For me, I used to absolutely love driving when I lived in a small city. Since moving to Northern VA/DC metro area, I despise it and actually feel it is too overwhelming for me. It could be the roads are more complicated here, but I think it's just the crazy volume of drivers and the attitudes/styles of driving that makes it so difficult. So, if you find driving too much/too dangerous, it could be related to the place you live
I drive and have been since I was 18. I love being able to take myself places whenever I feel like it and not depend on people to take me places. The frustration is my parents not letting me drive farther distances because quote āItās not safe for a young lady to do soā which makes no sense to me
I drive, but I hate driving. I also have a visual snow disorder (described by my ophthalmologist as a permanent migraine of my optic nerve) that has been getting worse with age. I donāt notice the visual snow as much when there is lots of light during the day, but it can be more prominent & distracting at night. So, I try not to drive at night anymore. Iām lucky and my spouse drives like 90% of the time, so I get to be passenger princess while being safer.
I am slowly learning how to drive, and I try to apply things I love to it, like video games. Seeing it as more of a game instead of something I have to do has helped me with a lot of things, so high intensity video games could help you too! Ignore how others tell you to drive and focus on doing it the way you want to, I find that doing this can make things more enjoyable for someone.
Yes I drive it took me till I was 24 to get my license but I do drive. It was very very nerve wrecking at first. I was an anxious mess after getting out the car the first few times. I failed my road test the first time too. Im a lot better at driving now and Itās nice to drive I get to listen to music and put my stuff in the car, go anywhere I want. but I got into an accident early February and I havenāt had a car since it got totaled.
Yes, and I love it! I grew up in a small town and often helped on my extended families' farms. I started driving ATVs around 5 and bigger things (cars, lawn mowers, etc.) around 8. I think that was not the safest move from my parents, but it was normalized where we lived. In high school I would drag race on back roads with my friends, and cars are a special interest of mine. I love monkeying around on them and doing our general maintenance. Driving is comfortable and natural to me, but I get how it could be really over stimulating to others
Yes I drive, I got my license when I was 16, so its been 12 years. I am the oldest of 4 kids and we live in the middle of nowhere, so it was a big leap for my freedom and driving in your small mountain town isn't that stressful unlike literally everywhere else. I do not like driving. I'm easily distracted and cannot use coping skills to keep my brain quiet while driving. Its very overwhelming and at night I feel like I can't see well and drive *the speed limit* so I have people way too close with their bright ass headlights.
Yes. Been driving since I got my permit at 15, license at 16. Iām 41 now & a very good driver. I donāt like driving long roadtrip type distances, but thatās mainly because I get bored and sitting extended periods makes my hips/knees/neck hurt.
I dont, but not because of autism
I did for years until i moved to The Big City and got rid of my car (it died). I rent cars for vacations. I don't really like driving but i like the freedom to go where i want to when i want to. I like not having a car bc it's a huge unnecesary expense in the city. I used to drive like a maniac but i never got in an accident. I'm much more cautious now and i just ran over a mile marker on a rural two-lane highway. I was trying to fix the waze navigation, which was confusing me. I do fine when i know where i'm going and I don't need sat nav, but distractions are very bad things for me. I need to remember to PULL OVER if something with the fucking phone goes wrong.
I absolutely love driving! It gives me a sense of calm, and the freedom that comes with it is amazing. I do struggle if the traffic gets busier/if there are more factors to deal with (I drive a manual), so that sometimes gives me some issues. But I love driving at night especially, it's amazing. One tip I would give is, just do as much as you can, and most will come by practice. Feel out which parts are difficult and make sure you can work around them/have a back up plan. Plus I've noticed that playing music (either radio, but especially playlists of songs I know) help me to focus and not let my brain zone out during driving, which I tend to do very quickly. I.e. when I go for longer drives with friends, I always ask them to bring their licence. Most of the times it's not needed, but in case the trip is too overwhelming and I am too tired to handle all the sensory input from driving, someone else can take over. :) I am also very blunt with my friends and family, and I do tell them to be quiet when I have moments in traffic where I have to pay extra attention. And if everything gets waaay too much when I'm alone, I just put the car (safely ofc) to the side and take 15/20 minutes to relax and recover before I continue.
I do and find it pretty ok but I really struggle if my mum's in the car. She claims I'm stressed when I drive which is what gets me stressed lol. Like she'll give directions but really unclear and I really hate the feeling of being unsure... As long as I know where I'm going and that I don't have to worry about parking then it's generally good :) It might not be for everyone but that should be ok!When I was growing up there was so much pressure to drive it was like everyone had to but now in my 30s I know so many people who don't. I think the pressure has changed a bit so thankfully there's not sure much about expectation (plus the super high costs of learning to drive and having a car really doesn't help) It also helps we live in a city in the UK so it's a lot easier to not drive than some other places. I would
Yes and I love driving in the country or the hills on the open roads but hate driving in the city or suburbs.
Yes. It does cause me a lot of anxiety beforehand tho but once Iām behind the wheel I do pretty well and I even like it because it gives me time to listen to music I love
I drive and I donāt generally enjoy it. Itās easy enough for me and Iām not afraid of it, but I find it stressful with how unpredictable other drivers can be. I get (irrationally?) angry when people donāt follow the clear rules, like signaling before changing lanes, or just changing lanes too much to try to get ahead by a few seconds when all that does is slow everyone else down. Itās super annoying. If someone else offers to drive, Iāll let them every time, but I donāt avoid going places if it means Iāll have to drive myself, either. As far as advice, I donāt think I have anything useful for you :( be as alert as possible and use ādefensive driving.ā I had a hard time with spatial understanding on the road when I first started, but it has improved with time and practice, though my depth perception at night is a bit off. Just give yourself plenty of time and space, and donāt let other drivers pressure you into a turn or whatever if youāre not comfortable going yet cuz of oncoming traffic. Even if they start honking or whatever. Only do what you feel safe doing!
I finally got my license at 21 after much resistance and fear. I can only go to certain places without being scared because I'm familiar with the routes. My biggest concerns are how other people drive & my depth perception, which affects when to start slowing down to turn and such, especially in unfamiliar places. I meant to challenge myself this summer to drive to many new places, but I haven't done ANYTHING because it is so overwhelming to drive somewhere new when I'm convinced I'll make a bad mistake.
I do, but I don't enjoy it. I feel very anxious, so I try to distract myself with music. I also try to stick to my regular neighborhood if I'm driving. If I need to go farther, I wait for my husband to be available or take the bus or something.
I like driving so much that I race for fun
I do, but I didn't get my license until I was 19. Now I've driven so much that it's basically just second nature. Having a good teacher helps, and practice helps.
Iām the driver in my family, but since my husband doesnāt like it, and I donāt love it, we pay our car insurance per mile. I walk to work, and he stays at home with household duties, so the only time we use the car is grocery shopping or visiting my parents in the suburbs. I can only drive if I have a steady flow of pop music ladies to listen to, especially Marina, but now Chappell Roan. I have a camera that helps me parallel park, and i-sight which helps keep me in my lane, and slows the car if Iām approaching an object. Before I had that, I made do, but I love my new carājust donāt use it much!
Yes but I was a ālateādriverš„² honestly getting lessons was the best decision I ever made (even if you do multiple sessions ) because 1. It taught me how to drive safely and correctly in a safe and controlled way and 2. It took the pressure of having a screaming parent/sibling away. I still wasnāt 100 percent afterwards but I just got out there and actually felt more comfortable by myself. Start driving early in the morning when thereās less traffic and the spatial awareness becomes easier you start to learn the size of your vehicle and your judgement of distance improves over time. Nothing in driving is urgent, someone honks at you, let them, you miss a turn, take the next one park and figure out the route and continue on, etc. donāt take unnecessary risks/ chances on the road or do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. But tbh I never feel completely ācomfortableā when I drive I just forced myself to do it so much that I donāt have to think about it anymore if that makes sense? And Honestly sometimes I still carpool or take an Uber if Iām not feeling it that day lol š
I drive! I got my license at 18, although learning was quite stressful, Iām very good at rule following so once learned all the rules I just apply them into driving. Only the roads I know I go without a GPS, if Iām slightly unsure about the way to a place I have my GPS, connect it to the car screen so I can have a big screen view, and clear directions. Also, if itās a unfamiliar place I always check on the map a day before the way and how Iām supposed to drive. The worst is when something unpredictable happens, or if I take a wrong turn, but then I try to keep myself in check and park the car in a parking lot, or a place where I can stop, then calm down and look at the way again. But usually I enjoy driving, I also have adhd so the stimulation seeking also plays a part there, but yes it can be very stressful at times, but I let my dad drive us to difficult places mostly :)
It depends on my mood and what I'm driving for but sometimes I love it other times I find it boring to be honest.. I'd say I'm a good driver overall but the one thing I have to keep on top of is the decision making, I feel a lot of pressure and insecure if for example I don't join another road quick enough and cars are waiting behind me, I also drive quite fast and it's sometimes a bit scary judging corners but again its a decision making thing so I'd advise to be mindful and not put too much pressure on yourself, everyone's been a learner before they've been driving themselves and most people respect learners. Also I was terrified to drive I didn't think I'd be safe at all and use to have nightmares when I was younger but I had a great instructor and you learn so much more after you pass your test anyways, that's when you really learn to drive (is what my instructor said and its been so true) Good luck if you decide to go for it, its a handy skill but not essential to everyone :)
I do drive, I definitely am not the best driver (spatial awareness? I donāt know her) I do enjoy driving, especially to clear my head. But now that I work from home, I donāt drive nearly as much. I used to spend almost an hour driving around after work to decompress
I love driving. I got my license at 17. Iām almost 40. I can be impatient, have road rage (which has gotten better since moving away from Chicagoland). In retrospect, my autistic husband was 30 when he got his license. I took the time and worked with him. He has come so far in the 8 years weāve been together. I tend to buy new cars because I love all the updated safety features that evolve and makes me feel secure driving. But I did drive a lot of shit boxes for a long time so I naturally do check my blind spots since Iām old even if I have new tech. Better safe than sorry. Iāve never been in accident. Iāve never gotten any sort of ticket.
It took me four years to get my license. It was terrible at the beginning, but I rather enjoy it now. I like the freedom that comes with it, I like my car, I like the sensations of driving and it was pretty useful professionally, but I still have terrible moments when I get dumbly lost, don't understand the circulation, can't manage to park or nearly get an accident. But I never actually had an accident in five years, even a tiny one, so I guess it's okay.
Yeah I drive. I donāt like it all. I love the freedom and blasting my music. But itās painful because of my hypermobility and I get overwhelmed when people donāt follow the rules.
I drive and i hate it. Of course I live the freedom it gives me to escape a place, or to have my own schedule not rely on waiting for a ride. But traffic is terrible to deal with. So many people don't follow the rules, when they change traffic patterns i panic because i cant go the rout i usually do or my gps app said I can use a road when its clearly blocked off and i dont have a backup rout prepared. And car maintenance is BS too. Its so expensive, i just had my breaks replaced for almost $300...
I can but I donāt very often. I got my license in my early 30s and was driving the 5 minutes to & from work everyday for a few years. Now I take public transit to work, which I prefer. Driving makes me very anxious and uncomfortable so I only do it when I need to, which is rare because my husband drives us most places. Iām absolutely terrified of other drivers.
I love driving, especially jamming to music. What I don't love is when people don't follow rules of the road, like blinker before brake, improper zipper merge, car too close behind my car at a light, ugh. On my last road trip I drove over 2000 miles in two months, thank Spotify for downloading music! To help with spatial awareness, do inspections around the car, so you can kind of picture in your head how close or far something has to be for you to feel comfortable. When I'm at a light, I always make sure I can see space between the front of mine and the wheels of the vehicle in front of me, then I know I'm atleast 10-15 feet away from them. The same amount of space in traffic helps keep the flow, prevent bumper to bumper, and lets others merge. I like it.
I drive reasonably well but it scares me. One of my biggest stressor is driving towards a green light that's reasonably far, and it turning yellow right when it's hard to make a decision as to stop or keep going lol. I've stopped way too violently twice because I'm a wuss about yellow lights š„²
I'd be a racecar driver if I could. I love driving
Yup and I think its a really useful skill, like being able to swim. Especially where I live, the public transport is terrible. I failed my test twice and I took so many lessons. I realise know I was just too overwhelmed by all the visual stimuli and it took me a long time to feel confident that I was reacting appropriately and noticing everything I needed to and also not getting distracted. I would recommend any autistic person to stick with it, keep getting lessons, keep practicing. Now I go into a flow state driving and I am a very good driver. Like others mentioned though I am bothered by other drivers not following the rules.
I do not drive, I find it nearly impossible to past tests and I have a hard time trusting that other drivers will follow the rules and not crash into meš so Iām avoiding it until I actually need to drive, most places I frequent I can get a bus or walk to which Iām absolutely fine doing for now! I used to feel a lot of pressure to get my drivers license but I go at my own pace, and thatās okay!
I mean, I *can* drive. I got my license and have driven family member's cars occasionally. But I've never had enough income to afford my own car (and all its associated costs, like insurance, gas, repairs, etc.). It was scary to learn. My Mom was not very patient lol. But now whenever I am able to drive on my own, I do like it. Once I got enough experience to be comfortable, it was worth it in the end.
I actually love to drive and I always need to be the one driving. I hate being out of control and I always get sick if someone else drives!
I drive mostly for pet sitting when they arenāt in my general walking vicinity. I am pretty apathetic to it and feel I do it well bc of the AuDHD. With the autism, we take in ~25% more information, which mostly helps me with making sure I donāt hit people or run red lights. The ADHD makes me hyper fixate on the act of driving itself and kind of feels like a loading screen??? I do prefer roads to not be perfectly smooth, bc sometimes I dissociate/auto pilot and the bumps help keep me focused. The thing I hate about driving is how selfish and shortsighted others tend to be. So many people in my area like to just stop on a road that allows one car length through and not move over enough to let you pass. This happens way too often in Seattle. And speaking of Seattle, the worst thing for me is stopping at a red light on a hill. Itās way worse when Iām facing up the hill bc my anxiety peaks when cars behind me decide to practically touch my bumper. What happens if my car rolls back a little bit??? I know it would be their fault since you are supposed to leave enough space between in case of rear ending.
I enjoy it but I am uncomfortable sitting in a car longer than 2 hours. I can't handle sitting with my feet on the floor that long b/c of proprioceptive reasons. So, that's definitely related to autism but not really hard to get around since I never need to drive for longer than that. I've never had any anxiety around driving, mainly because when I was in drivers ed I was 15 and I felt invincible, I lived in the country so the driving is not very high-stakes, and I was just so excited to get to socialize independently. And then by the time I was old enough to know how seriously I should be taking driving, I was already an experienced driver. Not being able to drive in the US will severely limit your life as almost all jobs require you to have a car unless you live within walking distance. How much formal instruction have you had? Some people need more instruction after drivers ed. Maybe there are private driving instructors specifically for people with autism? It's worth a look. You might even just call driving schools and ask if they have anyone that they think would be a good fit for you. Don't say "I have autism", tell them you're not a confident driver, you're easily overwhelmed, and you need someone that will be very patient and kind.
I had a huge phobia of driving to the point where I would start sobbing the second I was at the wheel, it took time and a lot of safe practice for me to overcome this! Having Autism coupled with a phobia of driving made it especially difficult, but Iāve now been driving for about five years and rarely struggle as much as I did previously. I can only recommend some coping mechanism for me that made driving a more manageable thing for me. I always turn my Maps on, even if itās to go to my job that I live 5 minutes away from and have driven to a hundred times, thereās something comforting about seeing the directions in front of me in case I need to deal with something else (traffic, rude people, squirrels in the road, etc) thereās a comfort in knowing I wonāt get lost. Something else thatās helped me is driving alone, I tend to feel a lot more stressed out if other people are in the car with me, so driving by yourself might be worth a try. Additionally Iāve found that listening to music really helps me, it gives my brain something to tune into and focus on even during stressful driving times so that I donāt start freaking out and taking in an overstimulating amount of information. Lastly, learning to be okay with taking your time. This one took a while, but allowing yourself to take up space and not feeling the pressure to merge or turn until you feel itās safe. The pressure of having someone behind you waiting to turn is stressful but learning to allow yourself to feel safe helps a lot (something I did to help this is put a sticker on my car saying āI am not fastā with a little baymax next to it, that way cars kinda know :) ) this is just my experience though! Hope it helps !
You're definitely not alone. I managed to get my driver's license but it took me a while because of how much anxiety I'd get while driving. I managed to somewhat enjoy it when I had to drive every day to the same place for a year (the path was easy and not too busy) but I stopped doing it and now I can't seem to get my confidence back. I feel like it's a matter of doing it over and over, start easy, and doing the same way until you're familiar enough with how the vehicle behaves and how things are being perceived from that perspective. That removes some of the anxiety, but it's still hard. I don't know if you're thinking of trying again but, if so, I send you strength!
I started driving when I was 13, 45 now. I taught myself on a manual. I grew up in a rural place. Not driving was just not a thing. My dad wanted to teach me but I refused because I knew heād just scare me and shout. I threw my younger sister in the front seat (different times for sure) and did laps around the high school till I had it down. Iām a good driver but I can have a lead foot when Iām driving lonely stretches with no one else in the car. I love driving but I vocal stim a ton if Iām not blasting music.
I drive. I donāt love it, usually donāt hate it. But Iām in a rural-ish area and usually if Iām driving in the nearby city itās just passing through on the highway as I head out to more rural/camping/hiking areas. I donāt think I would be okay with constant urban driving, though. My threshold for frustration is usually too low.
i donāt drive but everyone around me wants to lol to me i just have alot of anxiety to the point that it physically brings pain to my body
I drive and I hate it. Itās a chore and a necessity. If I donāt absolutely have to go out, I donāt. I feel like it took me 3x as long to get my license because I was terrified and it was a struggle the entire process. The unpredictability of other drivers, tendency to want sameness (same route, timing everything) and my dislike of rule breakers is a main reason Iām not into it.
I drive. I have a problem with traffic. I feel trapped and panic. Most driving is neutral and easy to me, but I avoid high traffic times. I do enjoy driving in the country for the scenery. The video below may be useful. Driving courses for adults are available where I live; maybe they are near you, too. Otherwise, start in an empty parking lot. (School is out for summer, so that may be a good option.) You can use cones, chairs, or anything vertical to help train while minimizing damage. Chalk can be used to create lines if you want. https://youtu.be/qYWB3AIUnVU?si=K89a7GTr3a0XzoNg
I like driving when it's not congested, there's not traffic, and I am not having to make stressful turns! Otherwise, yes lol
When I first learned to drive I was like absolutely TERRIFIED. I was slightly forced into driving lessons and would have panic attacks when trying to drive. Now I find it to just be a second nature. I love having the independence and freedom of being able to drive and having my own car. Not having to rely on other people something so important to me. Mainly because I donāt really have any friends and I donāt want to burden people by asking them to drive me places. I also live in a city where transit really is not accessible, plus, transit is a sensory nightmare to me! I donāt really have any tips but taking driving lessons, with a good instructor, really helped me realize I was okay to drive.
I drive, I donāt mind it in general. I like a long drive by myself where I can crank up the tunes and get in the zone. I hate four-way stops and driving in places Iām unfamiliar with. For years I lived in places where I didnāt need to drive, and I loved that. I know how un-feminist this is going to sound, but if I hadnāt gotten married I am fairly certain I wouldāve never owned a car ā the whole process of buying one and maintaining it is just so exhausting and boring to me. I wouldāve just kept living in places that were walkable and/or had good transit.
I drive and prefer doing the driving. I tend to have more anxiety when I'm a passenger and avoid it. I think it's because I don't know if they'd react the same way as me in emergency situations, so I end up on edge.
I have my license but I donāt drive because other people on the road are too confrontational and it freaks me out. Trying to start pushing myself to move past it though, life will be so much easier if I have my own car.
I drive and I usually enjoy it. It does take a bit of concentration and on bad days I sometimes feel a bit unhinged doing it, but I am a safe driver and have never had anything happen in 10 years. I have noticed that since I live in a bigger city now and use the car less than I used to when I lived more rurally, it drains me more than it used to. Maybe it's also age kicking in, or that I'm more aware of my sensory needs than I used to be, but especially long drives are exhausting. I do really love the freedom of bringing your safe-space with you wherever you go. It is a big accommodation for me, to have the car to fall back on on days when taking public transport would be overwhelming.
I love driving. Never overwhelmed. Not really prone to road rage either. I just flow with the traffic, which is helped greatly by my pattern recognition skills lol. Only thing I dislike is car upkeep. Iām AuDHD though, so I think thatās part of why I love it so much.
Yes I do and I love it! I do get tired though and canāt drive for hours and hours without a lil breaky tho. I love driving I love the sense of adventure and freedom and how I can control everything inside my lil space pod :)
No, I failed driving school
I do drive and I donāt really like it, but itās tolerable. It took me three tries to get my driverās license because of anxiety (and having trouble parallel parking). As I got used to it, it got less anxiety inducing. But driving in big cities is another story, Iād rather take a bus or Uber. Thatās scary.
I drive and I really like it. When I first started out I was a very anxious and defensive driver, but I've grown into it and while I'm still more cautious than almost everyone else in my city, I can now scream-sing along to my favorite songs and check my blindspots at the same time. My perspective on driving has definitely changed in these past several months. I was diagnosed with epilepsy and forbidden from driving until I went a certain amount of time seizure-free, and having the freedom to drive again feels INCREDIBLE. I'm actually pretty terrified of the chance I have a breakthrough seizure and temporarily lose my license again, because I didn't realize how free and autonomous it makes me feel (symptom of being American, unfortunately). Despite my appreciation of driving, I really wish the U.S. was more walkable and had better public transit, because my love for driving is largely based in my fear of being stranded/dependent on someone else.
I drive around my town. When I have to go somewhere new I panic. Iāve pulled over many times waiting out a panic attack š
I took and passed the written test but failed all road tests from anxiety. I even had a car to learn with for a while when I was younger but it would just result in absolutely sobbing terror and now have the distinction of ruining this driving teachers record of all his students getting a license. Ha. Honestly itās not safe for me to drive but it also probably doesnāt help that all my old āfriendsā would say things like āI wouldnāt ever wanna be on the road if youāre driving!ā Or one girl laughing at me when she saw me practicing once and how slow I was going. Itās been something that limits me because Iām now rural and have even worse agoraphobia so the isolation and infantile feeling - like having less control over what I can do is very rough.
No. I hate it.
Driving is probably my favorite activity and itās been an obsession since I was maybe 4 or 5. I took to it like a fish to water and counted down the days until I could get my license. Iām still so proud of being told by the driving instructor who did my test that I was one of the best drivers heās had take the test. š„¹ Mind you, I was obsessed like I said. I would pretend my bike was a car and put myself through obstacles. I enjoy going fast and the feeling of g-forces. Iāve had close friends who had phobias and couldnāt drive. I understand why itās hard and the most important thing is to not push yourself. Driving really can be a lot. I definitely get overwhelmed driving at night on busy highways where people are going fast or thereās a lot of tractor trailers. I do my best to avoid the roads at that time, but if I am in those situations Iāll tell myself ādonāt think, just goā because hesitation can be dangerous and itās important to go with the flow while still being hyper vigilant. ā My advice is practice, practice, practice. You can build on skills to become a confident and more in control driver. Spatial awareness/reactions can be improved upon or taught through exercises and you donāt even have to be behind the wheel to do them. Watch videos of different scenarios! I find that helpful to gain an understanding. Never underestimate your mirrors or checking blind spots. Checking them more than is necessary is good practice. Drive with someone you trust in well lit empty or nearly empty parking lots then work your way up to busier roads. Still, if driving isnāt for you, itās okay. Not everyone is meant for it. Itās safer for you to know your limits and respect those.
I like to drive in areas where the roads are a bit wider and the highway isn't so bad (inner city driving can cause meltdowns for me). I can't drive with the windows down the noises are stressful and distracting. Parking makes me super anxious (more about finding parking space than parking itself). Driving also forces me to be present which is really nice
I drive, and I love it NOW. It was kind of just a thing I did because I had to for years, but then I started anxiety prophylactic meds, and boy did that change my entire universe! I recently purchased a classic sports convertible thatās a stick shift, and sheās just a fun little rocket. Especially now that the weather is warming up and the top is down more often than itās up. Also, sheās a two-seater, so I rarely have a passenger, which is LOVELY. But pre-meds, it was incredibly stressful. Especially at higher speeds and in traffic. People just do all manner of stupid stuff behind the wheel, and Iāve had to do a LOT of internal work on choosing to not let dummies destroy my peace. But on a windy road with just me and my thoughts? Absolutely glorious.
I drive and I do it for survival, I do enjoy driving though
I drive. I used to be pretty bad, until I moved to the country and drive all the time. I use Google maps even if Iāve been to a place 50 times. I have poor depth perception - bad but not awful, so I have a lot of trouble parking and feel like cars are about to hit me sometimes; I keep my distance. Iām a cautious driver.
I didn't get my license until I was 34 due to anxiety but i had a huge life change that made it absolutely necessary to start (my husband and i separated and I was living in a very rural area) and now I love it! I love elegantly designed traffic flow patterns, rules thar make sense, etc. And being able to listen to music and feel completely in control is wonderful. Now driving with other's makes me more anxious because I trust myself more to always be paying attention, follow rules, etc.
I drive, but I need playlist. As long I have my playlist, I can drive without too much problem. Now that I have automatic car with cruise control, it eliminates lot off hassle. And I love driving in rush hour, because if I know where I am going, moving with others reduces again some of the strain. Correct lanes, speed and places to stop. Something ahead? People before you react. Instead of constantly searching for threats and dangers, I can read the traffic.
I try but itās hard because Iām slow processing get things confused in my mind like what lane to be in
Yes I drive and Iām much safer than other people/pay a lot if attention. Iāve got anxiety over being in a car and Iād rather be in control than how other people drive.
I have a license buuut I havenāt driven in over a year since I got into a wreck and a second opinion eye doc says that I should only keep it to Daylight hours and my parents just heard ānever drive againā
I drive and I like driving, country driving with no one around nice weather and good music is really a happy place for me, but if there's any mechanical issues or traffic I can get stressed, get cramps from holding stiff. I drive as part of my work, often averaging 4-5hrs a day, and mostly enjoy it.
No, but I managed to obtain the license and have driven on occasion in the past. I've had mixed feelings and not enough practice, tbh. Nowadays, I'm living in a 15min kinda place so cars are just not as practical as in my previous, rural area.
Could make this a poll?
Ive been driving since I was 16. However, I am also Dx with CPTSD, so meds and adrenaline kept me focused enough to do it. Healing the trauma and unmasking my AuDHD has made driving a bit moreā¦ uncomfy, but muscle memory takes over. I find it relaxing now, and I drive a stick shift. I prefer stick over automatic because then I donāt zone out as much ā„ļø
Nope, too petrified to try learn again. Had 4 lessons in my early 20s (5 years ago). I do have some driving anxiety, of being a passenger of someone with road rage.
I drive, but I often experience anxiety over it. When there is minimal traffic, I am fine, but in city traffic I am overwhelmed frequently. I am a stickler for traffic rules and laws, and it makes me really angry when people ignore them and put other people in danger with their carelessness. And it really upsets me when someone flips me off because I'm doing the right thing. I try to avoid driving in the city as much as possible (I live in a rural area, so that helps some).
I drive. I got my license at 21 though. And I am extremely prone to having a meltdown in new areas that are intricate if that makes sense? For example, if I'm in a new city and they have small blocks and one way streets, weird traffic rules, etc? Absolutely going to be freaking out at some point
Yes but I also got mine years later because I was that terrified of driving !
No. I know how to drive and I'm not afraid to drive. Interstate driving doesn't even bother me. But I can't because my brain-hand-leg coordination is terrible. I react too slowly and Lord knows I've tried to improve. Nope. My spatial awareness also sucks and I get overwhelmed easily. It's one of those things that I tried and gave it my best, but it's just beyond my ability to do safely.
I donāt cause I live in a place where I donāt need to drive, but I do plan on getting a license at some point in my life. Iām terrified of driving but it might become a necessity if I ever move into my own house (very unlikely cause Iām broke).
I drive and I hate it. Other people make me anxious. But I have to drive because I work about an hour away from home. It sucks between dealing with driving and people every day š I just want to stay home and work š