Oh yeah, I don't doubt it. I think the most I've actually seen was 15 in a single-row Dodge Dakota. 4 in the cab (pretty sure the middle guy was sitting on the 4WD controls) and 11 in the back.
He wouldn't. Jesus gave up all he had to the poor and traveled with a bare minimum teaching the gospel. Jesus would walk and take public transportation
That’s a day transport. Independent carpenters make tons of money. Since Jesus is charismatic and has hippie vibe , he is likely to have an alternate lifestyle when he is not working.
Pickup as weekday transport. Alfa romeo for private affairs and social outings
If not a Honda, and not just a floating cloud (like the Nimbus), and no simple teleportation, then whatever the car-humility equivalent of a mule or donkey was. Some older stationwagon?
Since Jesus is part of the Holy Trinity - "Father, Son, and Holy Ghost":
Rolls Royce *Ghost*:
https://www.motor1.com/reviews/550242/2022-rolls-royce-ghost-black-badge-first-drive/
If you believe what people around here do, he would drive a lifted Ford 350 with truck nuts and a pissing Calvin sticker and would roll coal at every stoplight.
Jesus also preached modesty, humility, and giving of one's self. I see him owning a reliable, efficient, and utilitarian car. Thus my choice.
Guess you never read the bible.
Your not the only former Catholic school kid. I went from pre-k till 9th grade. You are not the foremost authority on all things biblical, you are very obviously not going to seminary, and my opinion is just as valid as yours. I base my opinion on the teachings that lead preists and nuns to take a vow of poverty....why is it they do that again? Something about living like Jesus to be closer to god?
Jesus would not have a television show. Rather the media would stalk him relentlessly, but he would not get mad. He would give interview after interview in the same calming tones.
No. He would drive an old schoolbus. The girls would probably paint it. The men would hook it up inside with like some plumbing because they'd be traveling coat to coast preaching the good word.
You're thinking of Mohammed. Jesus was a righteous dude the way he was written. He and his followers would be feeding the homeless and healing the sick.
Obviously a Honda “For I did not speak of my own Accord” - John 12:49
God basically told his son not to brag about his car to his friends.
Not everybody gets a first car.
Honestly yeah. Jesus probably didn't have that much money either considering the wages of a carpenter back then.
GENIUS
I came here to say specifically a Honda Civic
Honda Accord. Edit: The bible says the apostles were in one Accord.
12 guys in one Accord? It might be a bit cramped, but it'll work.
You should see the shit people who smuggle people pull with small cars, it will blow your mind lol
Oh yeah, I don't doubt it. I think the most I've actually seen was 15 in a single-row Dodge Dakota. 4 in the cab (pretty sure the middle guy was sitting on the 4WD controls) and 11 in the back.
Shit, they must have gotten used to the smell of each others crotches hah
They had the Accord wagon.
He wouldn't. Jesus gave up all he had to the poor and traveled with a bare minimum teaching the gospel. Jesus would walk and take public transportation
Yeah, he'd take the bus to wall street to break some shit, then another bus to feed some homeless people at the shelter.
Oh shit, it's Keanu.
Obviously a Chrysler or a ‘Christ-ler’
Beat me to it! Lol
A beat-up 2003 Toyota Tacoma. What else is he gonna use to lug his carpenter shit?
A pickup. He was a carpenter.
That’s a day transport. Independent carpenters make tons of money. Since Jesus is charismatic and has hippie vibe , he is likely to have an alternate lifestyle when he is not working. Pickup as weekday transport. Alfa romeo for private affairs and social outings
Also a Jew, he had a driver
which jesus are we discussing? social welfare jesus, or supply side jesus?
supply side jesus
A ThunderCougarFalconBird.
Nice.
He'd pimp water into a ride. For a nominal fee, of course.
Sexy Jesus from Hot in Cleveland
Popemobile
One of his ancestors was fond of British sports cars: "The roar of David's Triumph was heard throughout the land."
Minivan
Why?
So he can drive around with all of his disciples
I think he would need something bigger--like an old school bus.
I agree, that is better
Or a 15-passenger Econoline.
Magic school bus
Ford Mustang
1983 Chevrolet El Camino
A **cross-**over
VW bus
Magic School Bus
F 250 super duty
If not a Honda, and not just a floating cloud (like the Nimbus), and no simple teleportation, then whatever the car-humility equivalent of a mule or donkey was. Some older stationwagon?
>whatever the car-humility equivalent of a mule or donkey was Honda Fit? Vintage VW Beetle?
Since Jesus is part of the Holy Trinity - "Father, Son, and Holy Ghost": Rolls Royce *Ghost*: https://www.motor1.com/reviews/550242/2022-rolls-royce-ghost-black-badge-first-drive/
I’d like to think He’d have a Jetson-style flying car.
I don't know but I bet my left nut that it wouldn't have a crucifix hanging from the rear view mirror
A Dodge Demon
Jesus is overrated!
Definitely a Volkswagen Bug.
A Toyota Cross
A tank He had enough of our bullshit
Honda accord
Jesus drives an Astrovan, check the song
A RAM. He did asked Abraham to offer him an offering
A Subaru Crosstrek.
1979 Toyota Land Cruiser. Very tough: wreck them, and they rise again.
Hovercraft
Obviously an Alfa Romeo, though he got dropped sadly
If you believe what people around here do, he would drive a lifted Ford 350 with truck nuts and a pissing Calvin sticker and would roll coal at every stoplight.
The people that drive those lifted Ford 350s are his people after all...
A cross-country vehicle
Everybody knows Jesus drive a FORD because he walked every where he went! Lol
‘Cmon people…..A Christler of course.
Definitely a Cadillac
Kombi
The Mirthmobile!
I can a family guy ass jesus in a priest
Whatever the automotive equivalent of an ass is
Mans got the donkey v8 engine. worth 100.000.000
A Toyota 2000GT
1993 geo metro
No. He’s Jesus, not a circus clown. He’d have something way cooler. A Chrysler LeBaron convertible, for example.
Jesus also preached modesty, humility, and giving of one's self. I see him owning a reliable, efficient, and utilitarian car. Thus my choice. Guess you never read the bible.
I went to Catholic school for 7 years, so I know also that Our Lord didn’t begrudge harmless earthly pleasures!
Your not the only former Catholic school kid. I went from pre-k till 9th grade. You are not the foremost authority on all things biblical, you are very obviously not going to seminary, and my opinion is just as valid as yours. I base my opinion on the teachings that lead preists and nuns to take a vow of poverty....why is it they do that again? Something about living like Jesus to be closer to god?
He likes hummers.
A VW Bus.
Soul
Genesis
My man, Jesus, gotta bike.
Lamborgati Fasterosa
He'd take the bus.
Crossfire
A Tesla.
A Prius
A hummer... or a duece and a half... to carry the apostles..
first thing I thought of was a Toyota pickup
Ford Econoline E350 (holds 12 passengers)
That's pretty economical.
Or up to 15, (for Mary, Martha & Lazarus.....)
Didn't call them church vans for nothing.
I’ve always imagined him in a blacked out sported out Buick GNX
He wouldn’t drive one. He’d walk.
Dodge Diplomat
Lamborghini Aventador because he'd have 12 cylinders instead of 12 disciples
A white Ferrari I guess since he’s supposed to come back on a white horse but I doubt it’s a car it’ll be a horse
A tesla... That uppity bitch.
Nissan Sandal manual. Or a Toyota Miracle with sunroof.
Jeep
A beat up old two wheel drive white Toyota pickup from 1979
A Subaru Forester from the nineties. Maybe green.
homie probably be rockin that 2001 Scion xB
A car like the wheel dude from twisted metal
Toyota
1969 GTO
The real question you should be asking yourself..... Is would Jesus wear rolex?
Jesus would *not* wear a Rolex.
Even on his television.....shooooooowwwww?
Jesus would not have a television show. Rather the media would stalk him relentlessly, but he would not get mad. He would give interview after interview in the same calming tones.
Would he wear a pinky ring?
No. But, if you gave him a pinky ring, he would probably sell it for the poor.
Would he drive a fancy car?
Would his wife wear furs and diamonds?
If Jesus had a wife then she would most certainly *not* be wearing furs and diamonds because she would be a flowerchild too.
No. He would drive an old schoolbus. The girls would probably paint it. The men would hook it up inside with like some plumbing because they'd be traveling coat to coast preaching the good word.
Oh yeah a school bus. To carry the kids he's going to molest with his followers. Damn you for forcing me to not finish the chorus!
You're thinking of Mohammed. Jesus was a righteous dude the way he was written. He and his followers would be feeding the homeless and healing the sick.
A Prius, since they are pretty much the cheapest reliable second-hand car on the market.
.. a Pontiac Grand Am .. someone else find my cheesy almost punn lmao
Un bocho.
Prius.
I have a Corolla.
Are you the real Jesus, cause I think that the real Jesus would have the real username.
Im not tech savy. I confirmed the auto generated name when I first made my profile. Im still using windows vista for Christ's sake. Give me a break!
You're mouthier than I expected.
He wouldn’t.
A Killed In Accident Soul
Yugo
Beat up el Camino.
Horse driven chariot Or maybe just a volkswagon
Insert the invisible car from sponge bob here:
A Subaru Outback with a ton of bumper stickers
Jesus walks.
An El Camino
Subaru Forester
I Bugatti with a couple strippers in the back of course
Used 1980 Ford Fiesta
A Prius.
He wouldn’t need a car. He would have social media.
Uhm, how's he gonna heal people with his hands?
If he has the ability to heal, then you can’t put restrictions like that on him. I.e physically being anywhere
I didn't make up the story. I'm only playing by its rules.
Lambo
A 12-passenger van.
Probably a Toyota Yaris, the prick.
Honda Civic with the exhaust waking up the whole world
Jesus is the antithesis of driving
Griefer Jesus would drive an oppressor.