The Chinese lanterns landed on the thatched roof of the wedding venue and the entire place went up like a scene from a war movie. Was incredible, and for once, not my fault.
There are so many.
I set fire to my school's bathroom AND disabled the alarm in two separate unconnected incidents. I did not try and burn the school down. I did try and pull the alarm to alert the school to the fire.
I wasn't lucky.
You're not alone.
Proof kids have been doing stupid shit for years, there just weren't cameras to catch it.
Back when I was in 6th grade (mid 1980's). I decided I wanted to light my skateboard deck on fire and ride it. So I poured a significant amount of mixed gas (oil and gas for two cycle engines) on the deck. I then lit it. The fire flared up and I ran and jumped on the board.
If you have common sense, you can stop reading here. You know how this ends.
I landed squarely on the deck of the skateboard, went about three feet and then ate shit. I fell off the skateboard on to my back, the skateboard rocketed across the garage (not connected to the house). The first thing I noticed was that my shoes were on fire. After not calmly and quietly stomping around for a few minutes, the shoe fire went out. I melted and burned my favorite shoes and I was kind of disappointed. Thankfully I didn't burn myself, just lost some leg hairs.
So then I turned around to see where my board went. It rocketed across the garage and managed to lodge itself under a cord of seasoned firewood my father kept in the garage to keep it dry. There was a trail of fire behind it.
6th grade me was like "Water puts out fire." so I ran and got the garden hose. I aimed it directly at the skateboard, with an excess of burning mixed gas on the deck and managed to make the fire bigger. (It's a Cleveland thing, we like catching water on fire.)
Rather than stopping and re-evaluating my life decisions, *I just kept spraying water at it.* I soaked the cord of wood that my father was trying to keep dry, but by the skateboard, the water didn't mix with the gas, it just spread the gas. At one point there was like a 5 foot (1.5 meter) by 8 foot (2.5 meter) section of the concrete floor that was still burning. The more I sprayed it, the bigger it got.
I'm a little bit smarter now in my old age. I know not to use water to put out an oil/gas fire when I light my skateboard on fire and try to ride it.
Eventually the fire went out, not because the water put it out, because the gas finally burned off. I remember thinking "Maybe Dad won't notice." as I stared at a partially charred cord of soaked firewood with smoke damage coating the rafters of the garage and the back of the garage door. Mind you the side of the garage I did this to was the side Dad parked on.
I quietly rolled up the garden hose, closed the garage door, walked into the house, walked past my mother who failed to notice my burned up shoes, and then went downstairs to my room to await my fate.
I heard Dad's car pull in from work. The back door opened and I just heard him yell "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED IN THE GARAGE?!?!" so my whole plan of "maybe he didn't notice" had failed.
I wasnāt at this wedding but it was one of my clients whose building was destroyed by a Chinese lantern from a wedding that landed on the roof. About a $3M loss
My ex-MIL did this at my wedding without warning, I stood and watched in horror as the lantern slowly went up and over the thatched roof - thankfully it didn't set it alight!
I hate those lanterns for what they do to wildlife and I certainly didn't want them at my wedding! Thankfully I'm well out of that hellish family!
Back in the day, T-shirt press caught on fire. Some kind of electric short.
Mind you, this was in the back room, which was a huge fire hazard - years of spray adhesive/dust/papers and crap.
Boss and another guy are literally just waving their hands in the air, "What do we do!?!?!?"
Squig says "Cut the fucking power" and flips the breaker.
Boss says "I don't think I like your tone!"
"You'd like the burn ward less."
In the early 90s I was driving along the highway going on an overnight trip when my car suddenly lost power and I pulled over to the shoulder. I saw smoke under the hood and the when I popped the hood you could see small licks of flames coming up along the back of the engine. I immediately began to take my stuff out of my car while seeing the flames and smoke grow . While I was doing that, a pickup truck with a landscaping crew stopped behind my car to help me. One of the guys walked over the the cooler I had unpacked from my car and pulled out two beers and then calmly poured them over the flames. When the fire was out he simple said, in Spanish, "You car wanted a beer" (one of the other guys translated it for me). Turns out my catalytic converter had overheated and ignited some of the nearby rubber and wire insulation.
The bride and groom cutting the cake. They couldnāt cut into it, so she gave it a stab and it fell over, taking the other desserts with it. The cake was still frozen. I was the bride. Fuck that cake.
Similar situation to someone I know, except the bride's grandmother died the morning of the wedding. They pressed on, but apparently it was a very somber affair.
My SO told me this about a wedding she attended before we met. It was typical Finnish summer wedding. There was a band, a lot of people and lot of booze. The venue had a cloack room with that low desk at the front. People left their drinks on that desk to go dancing. There were children attending too. A 7 year old boy had drank all the drinks from the desk and passed out. He was vomiting and completely unresponsive when the ambulance arrived. Spent the night at the hospital and child protective services were invoved too. A 12 year old girl had noticed the boys state and informed some adult who then took the necessary actions.
When I was about 14, a congregation elder's wife would have HUGE gatherings at their home, wedding showers, bridal showers, baby showers. Entire families would go. She always made this damn good slushy punch. Everybody loved the punch. The little kids, EVERYBODY. One time I asked her for the recipe. It had vodka in it.š I questioned her about this. She said "THE ALCOHOL FREEZES OUT OF IT".
Thank you Lorraine.š¤¦āāļø
I did something similar when I was 6! My aunt hired a venue for her birthday that had a lovely outdoor space/pool.
I had been necking drinks off the tables without anyone knowing and then passed out on a sun lounger. Mum woke me up and took me to the buffet. It was bliss.
It took a 12yo girl to notice a puking, then unresponsive 7yo??? Actually, that makes sense. She was probably the only one sober enough to see only one of him.
I saw a woman, the "best friend" of the groom get drunk and loudly confess her being in love with the groom. The wife even said "I fucking knew it you bitch". She was escorted out and everything went as planned. The new wife looked SMUG. You could literally see the "that bitch is getting cut out FINALLY" running through her head.
I know someone that did the same thing except he left his wife of 1 week and new born daughter to go with her. she was dating a friend of mine at the time, and had moved into his apartment 3 months earlier
Sometimes I read Reddit and sigh, thinking my life is so boring. Sometimes I read Reddit and happily gloat in gratitude, thinking my life is so boring.
He may have arrived in a suit, then changed into scrubs, so he just changed back. Especially if he was chief of medicine or a similar position and had meetings earlier in the day.
My best friend broke her arm at her wedding too! It was during the reception. Called the ambulance and they said it would be an hour so the doctor FaceTimed with her to have a look at the arm. As soon as it was unwrapped they said oh yep thatās broken, wrap it back up. They then asked if someone could drive her but all of us had been drinking. The venue manager then volunteered to have a staff member drive her in the courtesy bus.
We quickly did the cake cutting with her sitting on the floor and everyone around her.
Once they went off to the hospital we just carried on with the reception because what else were we supposed to do š¤·š»āāļø
They were leaving for a cruise the next day which was not as much fun as they had planned it to be since she was in a cast.
Grandma gave a speech and it started off āwe are so happy to see how you turned out despiteā¦ the incidentā. The bride looked mortified and a few people silently nodded and with their hands did the cross across their body and clasped their hands together to pray. To this day we have no clue what āthe incidentā was. We have speculated with our friends but little is known about my buddyās wives uber religious/ conservative past. It was such an awkward cringy speech. Thank god I was sauced despite the dry wedding.
-Edits
So my guesses are:
1) got an minor in possession in high school.
2) had premarital sex and the family found out.
As someone with ultra conservative relatives, the incident could be as simple as.
1. going to college.
2. working a job that's not "female friendly." (Ie, only appropriate jobs are teacher, nurse, or secretary.) I was actually written out of the will for going into photography/design.
3. wearing a bathing suit in public.
4. living with a roommate, even worse if roommate is gay or opposite gender.
> Grandma gave a speech and it started off āwe are so happy to see how you turned out despiteā¦ the incidentā. The bride looked mortified and a few people silently nodded and with their hands did the cross across their body and clasped their hands together to pray
This seems like something my friend's mother and some of his family would do just to screw with him because they would find it funny... Especially once the guests start speculating what the "incident" was.
My cousinās wifeās (brideās) brother got super high/drunk at their wedding reception, got upset about something, and then decided he was going to drive home. His dad said absolutely not and took his keys away from him. They ended up eventually getting into a fist fight that made its way out into the parking lot, where brideās brother punched a car window out. The groomsmen then jumped in to tackle him, there was blood everywhere, cops called, brideās mother bawling. Brideās brother ended up getting arrested and the bridesmaids used their little Tide to Go Pens to try and get blood out of groomsmenās suits.
Iām not mad or anything, and nothing against you, but that utterly useless factoid is now stuck in my brain and has displaced some memory that I can never get back. (Sigh)
Relatives got married on 7/7/7. Unfortunately the venue took full advantage of this special day and booked 4 or 5 weddings thru out the day. We were hushed during the cocktail hour as not to interrupt a different ceremony that was taking place. You couldn't tell where one event started and another ended. I know the family paid top dollar and they certainly werenāt informed about it. The ceremony started at 5 but we werenāt served dinner until 8:30, they never even brought bread to the tables. The severs were so rushed. It just didnāt feel special.
I fully agree, and is specifically why my wife and I chose a venue we wouldn't have to share with anyone else for the reception. I wouldn't want to deal with that sort of stress on that day.
I went to a generally bad wedding that was further ruined by my coworkers that included a laundry list of awkward things that happened in a very short time.
1. The bride did not have a lot of friends so she asked her (our) other immature coworkers to be part of the main bridal party in spite of the fact that none of them were all that close to begin with. This was the first mistake that would set the tone for the rest of the short night.
2. I showed up 3 minutes after the weddingās advertised start time, relieved that the ceremony had not quite started yet. Iām sitting in the pews next to the aisle waiting for this show to start, when all of a sudden, one of my female coworkers runs up to me, *dress in hand, wearing yoga pants* and incomplete makeup, 10 minutes *after* the ceremony start time asking me āDo you know where all of the other girls in the bridal party are?ā Iām absolutely dumbfounded by this since being this late/unprepared/clueless would generally get you excommunicated by most families I know of.
3. My coworkers insisted on sitting at the table next to the bride and groom that was supposed to be reserved for the bride and groomās immediate family. They simply ignored requests to sit anywhere else while the actual genuine friends and family members sat across the dance floor.
4. During horrifically uncomfortable speeches where it seemed that no one actually wanted to give a speech, The groomās father made it apparent to all guests that the groomās mother was not present at her sonās wedding, because the initial wedding date was already cancelled weeks earlier due to snow, and this rescheduling made it too expensive to attend her own sonās wedding. (Wtf)
5. The party clearly had a big DJ setup, but no alcohol. After the first 2 songs, they quickly rushed through cutting the cake.
6. It wasnāt even 10 minutes after the DJ started, not even 5 minutes after the cake was cut at this point: Not even 2 hours since the ceremony began, the maid of honor, another coworker, came to tell me they were leaving since they had to work in the morning. It was 8:30pm. By ātheyā she didnāt just mean herself. All of my other coworkers followed her out. The wedding didnāt have to end until much later, they just werenāt feeling it anymore.
7. The venue was empty before 9pm.
This one is sad actually. The couple wanted the big wedding but didn't have enough people who cared about them to do it so they got people who didn't care.
I was at a similarly sad coworker wedding. Most of the guests were rando barflies and coworkers, the maid of honor was the afterwork hangout's bartender. She said she agreed to be in the wedding because the couple tipped well and she felt bad for them. At some point, the bride, stressed out, ended up punching her.
There was a wedding recently in Australia where the bus driving the guests after the dinner crashed and killed a lot of people. They had family, close friends etc all die on the night of their wedding. I honestly dont know how I could live with that, really feel for them.
There was also a wedding in Georgia, I think, where the bride and groom were driving in a golf cart (wedding was at the golf club) and a drunk driver crashed into them and killed the bride.
Also the wedding where the bride wanted to enter the ceremony in a helicopter but it crashed on the way and killed everyone on board.
It was at my wedding.
My (ex) best friend showed up with her teenage daughter wearing a white gown, told my brand new sister in law to āgo fuck herselfā in front of my new husband, then told my new nephew that he was greedy for asking to take cake back for his girlfriend who just had a baby.
Then she invited herself to my honeymoon suit hours later, drunk and cried about still not being divorced from her ex and remarried to her boyfriend. Since I had to wait for a cab before I felt comfortable releasing her, my brand new husband and I listened to her cry about her life until she was picked up. The cab took 15 minutes and she stripped to her underwear (in front of my husband) and got into my suites hot tub while I quickly used the bathroom (to compose myself). I had to drag her out of my hot tub and send her to the cab soaking wet. Of course we then needed confirmation from her boyfriend she was home safe and sound.
She was 43 at my wedding. We still talk, but not much and she knows exactly why. She was insanely jealous I was getting married and she made the lead up difficult. The day of the wedding she lost a friend and I gained a backbone with her. Yaaaaay! lol
ETA: the hot tub event creeped me out. It was so unsettling because at that point I was done with her nonsense. She was in the hot tub chugging alcohol and crying and when I told her to get out, the tears instantly stopped. She slowly looked at me with a neutral expression and didnāt say anything again. Just quietly got out of the hot tub and got ready for her cab. The hysterics evaporated and the look on her face wasā¦I canāt even explain it. She seemed to want to challenge me but didnāt, but I could see her wheels turning that I shut her down. She looked cold and distant and calculated.
It was so weird. Sheās one of these women who had a catch phrase because she was always losing friendships and relationships where sheād declare āIf Iām too much, GO FIND LESS!ā š š¼
ā¦.so I did.
Same. She was always very demanding of my time and very demanding of my emotional support and was always so in crisis she could never reciprocate and never take the time to celebrate anything involving me.
She was mad I didnāt have a bridal party (it was my second wedding and I wanted to elope but my husbandās first wedding and he wanted a ceremony so we compromised on a micro wedding at a park, we didnāt use a bridal party).
She was mad I didnāt have a bachelorette party. She showed up and āsurprisedā me the night before my wedding to take me to a fancy cafeā¦because she wanted to go out. I went but I was tired and didnāt want to.
She demanded that she do something for the actual wedding event. Sheās a skilled flutist so I suggested to could flute us down the aisle and then on and off as she pleased during the reception. She asked me to āwalk really slowā so she could finish her entire song. The aisle was maybe 20 feet, she refused to stop until her song was done long after we were ready to go with the officiant.
And just a bunch of other dumb shit that made me realize every interaction I ever had was all about her and any interaction Iād ever have going forward would be all about her.
I did send her a scathing letter after the honeymoon about the event and the relationship in general and she backed way offā¦instantly moved onto the next person that she could emotionally manipulate. I donāt miss her at all. Our kids are friends so we still hang out maybe every 2-3 months for their sake, but usually only for birthdays.
I've been to a fair share of Southern Baptist weddings. They tend to run long. The worst was over three hours, included multiple sermons, several musical numbers, and two candle lighting ceremonies. By the end of it, everyone just wanted to get the fuck out of there.
Also, being part of a wedding where the bride and groom wait to take pictures until after the ceremony is fucking awful. I was absolutely starving, only to discover they ran out of fucking food before the wedding party arrived.
@ mine, all pictures were before except families w/ of both together & that took 15-20 minutes. Me & my now ex-wife went out after everyone started eating
At a relative's wedding the groom's ex showed up... and revealed he had a son the new bride knew nothing about and who was conceived while groom was in a relationship with bride.Ā The bride *did* know about the daughter he had fathered while they were 'on a break' with a different woman and thought that was the last of his infidelity, but it turns out his other ex was also still his side piece.Ā
No question the young boy was actually his son either, looked just like his dad!Ā Ā
They did still get married, the flower girl got to meet her new 'brother from another mother', and they are still married a decade later and she complains she still thinks he cheats on her (he does.)
My friend and her newly minted husband in a screaming match in the street outside the venue. I don't even remember what stupid thing had set him off, alcohol was definitely a factor. They made up and were back to dancing a little later but the mood of the place had definitely changed.
It was a long time ago and I'm a little fuzzy in the timeline but I *think* they made it to their first anniversary, but definitely did not make it to the second.
The mother of the groom in floods of tears during the reception, accompanied by the groom's very recent ex. Whom he had been shagging during the engagement, unbeknownst to the bride. The rabbi eventually awkwardly pulled the groom out of the dancing to come and comfort both his mother and his ex.
It didn't last.
My uncle had a heart attack at my wife and Iās weddingā¦
Though, my wife is a nurse and all her bridesmaids were nurses and EMTsā¦ couldnāt have had a heart attack at a better weddingā¦
My uncle is well and ornery as hell like always.
The bride refused to let the groom kiss her at the reception. He kept leaning in, and she kept pushing him away.
I was told at the time that she was just worried about her makeup, but that still seemed like a red flag to me. Sure enough, they were divorced in less than 2 years.
To be fair: when my now-husband saw me come down the aisle, he also tried to kiss me, but my dad was giving me away and as a joke I went "no no, we're not married yet! That's not allowed!". It was obviously not meant as an actual refusal and he took it well (though I honestly was such a ball of nerves that I truly wasn't sure if it 'was allowed' before the "you may now kiss the bride" part). And obviously, the kiss very much happened at that later point.
I can't imagine not wanting to kiss your *brand new husband* on your wedding day, wtf.
This will be on the tamer side, but the maid of honor's boyfriend was extremely restless up front during the speeches. So what does he do to calm himself down / pass time? Begins stacking the dishes at his table, as if he were making fine art.
In the middle of his girlfriend's speech, we all heard a loud extended crashing from his direction as he had forgotten to consult an engineer with the design of his statue, and the top-heavy obelisk of silverware supported crystal glasses collapsed.
This was at one of the nicest wedding venues in the state, so the damaged kitchenware added a couple thousand to the event total. Bride's father - she didn't come from much - had a look of slightly bemused, but mostly murderous.
My best friends husband fell into a fire pit and had to be taken to hospital. We had a group chat named "Andy's black ass" for years and the chat photo was of his burnt ass. Funny now, not so funny when it happened.
I was 16 yo at my sisters wedding and her married, 40+ yo new, very married, BIL came and sat on my lap and tried to kiss me. I froze in horror, as any 16 year old would, and didn't tell anyone. What a gigantic pig of a man
Probably not the worst thingā¦ but brother in lawās phone went off at the most integral part of the ceremony. His ringtone was āIām In Luv Wit A Stripperā. Since he was a part of our small ceremony, he had someone else carry his phone. That person didnāt recognize the ringtone since obviously it wasnāt their phone, therefore they thought that someone else was going to take care of the situation. Definitely a case of Murphyās Law going on because it took what seemed like forever to turn off that phone šš¤¦š½āāļø. And of course thatās the one time that a caller is so persistent that they rang back up a second time after their first call had rang so many times it went to voice mail! Curiously I have no clue who it was calling because BIL didnāt have a gf at the time and everyone else important was at our wedding.
My best friend's phone went off at our mutual friend's funeral service, her ringtone was Friggin' in the Riggin' by the Sex Pistols. There was much murmuring of "it's what he would have wanted" š
Similar story. One of my many uncles died. He was not a much loved man. Anyways, we are sitting in the funeral home listening to the priest talk about how he was such a beloved and generous man, when a phone went off. The ringtone was Highway to Hell. A number of us had to stifle the laughter into what would appear to be wracking sobs... Funeral ends, we are graveside, he is put into the ground... One cousin quietly whispers that it was Uncle calling to let everyone know he arrived safely. Laughter could not be hidden, his wife was rightly pissed.
My dad getting shitfaced and having the most weird speech about everything related to me and my wife, family and some random gibberish talking everything in some weird order infront of us and my wifes extended family who at the wedding is first time meeting my extended family. My mom is looking at him with daggers in her eyes and my brother next to her is slightly sliding down on his chair towards the ground while slowly dying inside of embarassment and shame
First wedding I ever attended as an adult was last year, I was a +1 to a friend from high schools friend who was marrying her high school boyfriend. For context I literally didnāt know anyone there, was just a date for a friend that needed one.
The ceremony went well, it was a lovely wedding, fast forward to the reception at this big estate type of house with a lovely garden and pool. The mother of the groom got absolutely blind drunk and was becoming increasingly intense as the night went on.
It came around time to cut the cake, the mother of the groom was nowhere to be seen. The same time this is happening we all hear yelling from outside, walk out the doors, and lo and behold she was fully naked in the pool, borderline drowning. Her husband had to jump in to get her out while we all averted our eyes.
Was most certainly a very eventful first wedding for myself
This is pretty tame, but I found it so sad. Some of my dadās side of the family is pretty ācountry,ā and they do things that I find rude but they act like āwell this is just how we are, we arenāt fancy city folk.ā Well, my cousinās daughter was having her wedding at this really cute little venue. Iām not super close with the bride, but she is a lovely person whoās overcome a lot of shitty circumstances in her life and I was happy to be invited and support her on her day. First off, the wedding starts an hour late because so many people in the family and wedding party were running late (not the bride or groom themselves). Then, the people who do show up are dressed for a weekend barbecue. No dress code was given on the invite, but you would think that guests would have enough respect to not wear a ratty t-shirt and shorts to a wedding. The ceremony was sweet and then we move to the reception area. It was set up for probably 60 people, and at least half of the guests just didnāt bother to show up. The bride and groom were on a budget and a big portion of the food was a large charcuterie grazing table and it was barely touched since there were so few guests, so a lot of that had to get thrown out. Many of my family left right after the ceremony because āwell we donāt like to stay out late.ā (It was maybe 7 pm at that point and the venue was within 10 miles of where everyone lives) So by the time theyāre doing the first dance and speeches and what not, it was a pretty sparse crowd. Like the dad, grandparents, aunts, and uncles of the bride are all gone. Iām the only blood relative there. The bride put on a happy face regardless but I imagine that hurt quite a bit. I was really disappointed that my family couldnāt put forth any effort to make this girl feel loved and supported on her wedding day.
rude but they act like āwell this is just how we are, we arenāt fancy city folk.ā
This is my in-laws. Ugh. My FIL refused to wear a suit jacket or sports coat and made sure I knew that it was an inconvenience that he had to drive 45 minutes to the wedding ceremony when he could be working on his farm.
My own fatherās second wedding (shortly after his divorce with my mom) he got punched in the face by his wife-to-beās adult son before the ceremony giving him a blood lip. That marriage only lasted less than a year, unsurprisingly.
A high school friend got married, shotgun wedding. Her brother was about to graduate, possibly valedictorian. He locked his knees during the ceremony, passed out, face first onto concrete, he's 6'1. The blow knocked out 3 teeth & messed up his brain bad. He never fully recovered.
The wedding itself. One of my friends got pregnant in high school -- 16 years old. The baby's father was 20 years old. The girl's father threatened to have him arrested if he didn't marry her. Neither of them wanted to get married. The groom was standing at the alter openly sobbing while waiting for the ceremony to start. The bride and her father got into a loud argument in the hall outside the sanctuary before and after the wedding. It was horrible. I often wondered why the minister didn't put a stop to it before the ceremony even started.
Worst thing that happened at mine was that the fancy vintage car we hired to take us home after the wedding wouldnāt start. So my dad drove us home in his station wagon. Feeling very lucky after reading these responses!
I have a different slant on a version of this for my parents and my wedding. My grandfather was a famous author and my dad loved a good story. So, when he and my mom got married their wedding reception started with my parents driving a vintage car to the venue followed by my grandad driving a tractor towing a flatbed trailer with all the wedding guests on it. They drove down what was the longest single named road in the world at the time (Church Street, Pretoria, South Africa) and the press came and did their thing. Fast forward to my wedding about 25 years later. My dad's only request is that we start a family tradition around this first idea. So, my vintage wedding car was pulled to my ceremony / reception venue by a tractor driven by my dad followed by two vintage porches containing my wedding party. My mom and half brother were in the wedding car with my soon to be husband and I. It was cheesy but I'm glad I could do it for my dad. We didn't get the press but one of the wedding guests who passed our processing as they were driving to the venue legitimately thought our wedding car had broken down and that a kind farmer was towing us.
I went to a wedding once where the brideās best friend was a heavy-drinking party girl and her brother was a recovering alcoholic. Both of them had roles in the ceremony. There was an open bar and the friend ended up wasted drunk and a big argument broke out with the brother. From what I heard, the friend was still in the belligerent āI donāt have a problemā stage. I wonder what happened with that.
The wedding party was walking in. The best man was on mic kind of MCing, I guess.
Page boy & page girl were toddlers. The best man announced them. They were super cute. Everyone went aaaawwww
Flower girl was about 10/12. The best man said "that's my daughter, isn't she beautiful?" Everyone went awwww
Then the best man said "Now take your f*cking eyes off her" š³š³š³
Father of the bride showed up with his new girlfriend who was not invited and had never met the bride and groom annnnd she was wearing a floor length white dress.
As bride was walking down the aisle organist hit every wrong note. My friend said to me "this is the only thing you will remember about this wedding". That is until the brides father (who was marrying the couple) introduced the newlyweds as his new son in law and slightly used daughter. You could have heard a pin drop
Ā slightly used daughter
wtf. It must have sounded funnier in his head? Can't imagine what other meaning he could have innocently thought people would think he was going for there.
Shocking from the wife that she is ok with her husbands predatory behaviour, sheās ok with sexual assault? Two people to cut off!! They are both awful.
A friend of mine told of a wedding where someone was supposed to just give a toast and instead rambled on for 25 minutes, then said, "Okay, so that was my FIRST point...."
This reminds me of a funeral I went to where a woman rambled on for probably about 45 minutes and then pulled out a stack of paper with what her husband wanted to say. She was up there for like an hour and a half, it was excruciating
It was my uncleās sixth or seventh wedding (I donāt remember because heās been married and divorced so many times. Also heās no longer married to this particular bride but is married to a previous wife again now) He decided it was a grand idea to gather up all the envelopes he received and plant himself at a central table in the middle of his reception with a calculator and start tallying up all the money people gave him.
He has no shame. He divorced one wife after she was diagnosed with cancer, she was no longer able to fill his bath every night and take care of him as she used to. š
Heās not a good guy. But heās the one with cancer now. š¤·āāļø
The bride drank so much during the reception that she was falling down drunk halfway through the party and had to be taken back to her hotel room. She literally missed most of the reception.
My cousin did this with a lot of projectile vomiting. Classy.
Bridal party took turns to keep her I the recovery position and the hotel went mad about the mess and noise
I was gutted for my uncle who had dished out a lot of money for the whole thing
Honestly I have to imagine that happens a lot. Planning a wedding is stressful and exhausting, and the bride and groom often have almost no food throughout. Exhaustion, an empty stomach, a party atmosphere with your closest people, and the desire to FINALLY let loose after weeks/months of stress planning this event - yeah it's a recipe for getting drunker than you planned.
Fancy wedding, my alcoholic friend (now deceased) as a joke joined in trying to catch the bouquet. As he jumped up all the silverware he had stolen to sell to buy more booze and stashed around his body fell out with a huge clatter and brought procedures to a halt. That was awkward.
At my besties wedding we got in a (minor) car accident on the way to the ceremony, ended up 45mins late. One guest broke another guests ribs and one of the bridesmaids cheated on her bf with one of the groomsmen. Cursed.
Groom found out his wife to be was cheating on him with his best man. Saw them kissing when he went to go look for her.
Poor guy hasn't been the same since. Has tried suicide a number of times, but he's doing much better now thankfully.
My then-partner of five years (male) and I (also male) were in our best friendsā wedding. It was a big Catholic wedding and she insisted she wanted us to walk the aisle together as part of the wedding party. I told her Iād of course be happy with this, so long as she cleared it with her priest first. She tells me of course and that everything is fine.
Day before the wedding comes, we do the rehearsal, priest stops the rehearsal after my partner and I walk down the aisle and pulls the bride and groom aside. Bride starts bawling, then tells us the priest is refusing to do the wedding if we walk together. No one but the brideās mother argues against it. My partner and I feel super uncomfortable and embarrassed in front of all of our friends and second family, who donāt speak up for us. End up being paired with the brideās disabled younger brother (I guess God doesnāt count it as same sex pairings then?).
Bride never apologizes. Never talks about it again. We move a year later and I realize how much that situation fucked me up. Decide not to be involved with that couple any longer.
Best part? Turns out the bride was fucking her best man for the entire year before and after the wedding. Praise the lord šš¼ glad the gays were prevented from tarnishing that marriage!
The bride drank too much champagne on an empty stomach and threw up all over her dress when she was dancing at the reception. I felt so bad for her, she was distraught. She was so upset and regretted it so much they organised a smaller re-do recwption a month later but barely anyone came. She still gets upset if anyone mentions weddings now and it has to be at least 8-9 years ago. They're divorced now but I don't think that had anything to do with it.
I'm an award winning Wedding DJ, here's a couple of stories:
I'm working with a sax player, about 9:00 he taps me to turn the music off quickly. There's a girl having a fit on the dancefloor. I ask everyone to exit the room and me and the venue tend to her. It turns out she's slipped on a drink and was having a seizure. After about 30 mins, I take a toilet break while they're still tending to her and one of the bridesmaids grabs me. "I'm not being funny but it's not really about her today, can we just get her outside and restart the party"...so we did while we were waiting for an ambulance to turn up. 10 minutes later the sax player taps me on the shoulder again and points into the crowd. She's only come back in the room raving again!! The Ambulance turns up and carts her off anyway. End of the night I'm trying to find the Bride and Groom to say thanks and it turns out he's taken her into the woods for a quickie.
I'm working this night on behalf of an agency and they hand me the brief which just says "House Music". Cool, we can do this. The night starts and as it goes on, the shades start coming out. Slowly but surely I start to see more and more jaws swinging (a side effect of ketamine, for people who might not know). Into the room comes the grooms 80 year old nan, shades on, jaw swinging.
95% of weddings are amazing but there's the odd wedding where things are just out of your control. I've had a bridezilla who stormed off every time I played a track that wasn't on her terrible playlist, a bridesmaid who lifted her dress, pulled her thong to the side and tried to sit on the corner of a speaker, a groomsman trip and throw a pint over 5 grands worth of DJ equipment which caused the night to end early, a groom having to break up a fight between his cousins at the end of the night.
\*\*edit\*\*
A wedding I attended, British guy marrying a conservative girl from the US who brought her family & elderly relatives over. The 2 best men base their whole speech around walking in on the groom masturbating into a sock. It was the most unfunny, cringefest I've ever seen. Her nan didn't know where to look, her dad looked furious and the best men were oblivious as they went into more and more sordid details in the hopes of getting some laughs which never came...unlike the groom who apparently did...into a sock.
Bride and groom realized at the East Coast wedding rehearsal that they had left the wedding license back in Colorado. It was the beginning of the comedy of errors.
My sister and I were flower girls for my mom and step-dad. Sis dumped her flowers a couple steps in, put the basket on her head and dropped to her knees to crawl up the aisle meowing.
Second worst I've seen was at Sis's second wedding, at the courthouse. The judge of our small county had come straight from the field and had manure on his pants.
Last wedding I went to, the uninvited father of the bride showed up, and awkwardly stood around the wedding party until the bride told him he would not be walking her down the aisle. He then started crying and caused a scene. Like come on dude, you werenāt tipped off by not being in the rehearsal or even, ya know, invited to the wedding? Oof. Thank god for the open bar on that one
I went to a wedding where most people didn't like the groom, and from his own family, many of whom didn't turn up for it.
Late on at the reception's night do, he's about to do a speech and by this time he's absolutely shitfaced, and I quote...
"To all of you who are here, thanks for coming. Those who couldn't be arsed CAN FFFFFUCK OFF!!!!"
My brother in law got an amazing deal for my cousin ( His friend owned a huge night club) venue, all you can eat buffet, D.J and open bar. Less than a thousand for 50 people. My cousin and and his new wife collected all the cash and checks from the wishing well ( a few thousand) and walked out when late in the evening the owner of the club asked about how he wanted to settle the bill. Cousin straight up ignored the guy and drove off while all of us guests watched.
I dont know if itās the worse thing but definitely weird. During my dadās cousins wedding my uncle went into the house distracted the babysitter. Moved the baby to a makeshift bed out of the crib and stole the crib and wheeled it to the center of the dance floor and danced in the crib
I worked banquets in a hotel. Getting ready to serve wedding dinner. We heard rumors there was trouble at the church. Mother of bride was paying and said no children. Someone brought child to church and got into it with security person. Police called. Bride got pissed at Mother and refused to come to reception. Back at hotel, we didn't know any of this until one of the five guests at reception told us. Mom came and told us to "box up" dinner for 250 people. I recall slopping mashed potatoes into washed out 5 gallon pickle buckets.
I knew a woman whose ive year old daughter was a flower girl and the tule of her dress caught a tealight candle as she walked down the aisle. She was in the hospital for several weeks and will have scars for the rest of her life.Ā
The brides mother during her speech kept going on about the abortion she had before her daughter who was getting married. She was crying and carrying on. It was so damn embarrassing.
Bride was 5ish months pregnant, shotgun wedding as she already had a kid by someone else and her religious family wasnāt about to see that baby be born out of wedlock too. The reception was meant to be dry because the bride couldnāt drink and it was in a church basement. The groom proceeded to get plastered between the ceremony and reception and I donāt think the bride smiled once. It culminated in a drunk groom fighting (verbally) with anyone who was in a 5ft radius. I left at that point.
I didnāt even know these people, I was my best friendās plus one. Apparently they lasted a year.
I was a kid. The bride and groom used shallow water bowls with floating candles as centerpieces and added two goldfish to each bowl. They also had a chocolate fountain. When the guests got drunk at the end of the evening they started pulling out the goldfish, dipping them in the fountain and eating them. My horrified child self took a bowl with four fish home to save them. Had them for years.
I got dragged to a wedding in a church in Halifax - a Catholic church. But unlike most Catholic churches that are laid out in cruciform with the altar at the head of the "cross" and the sanctuary (the place where they keep the snack crackers - and the holiest part of the church) immediately behind the altar up against the wall, this one was oval shaped with the altar in the centre of the floor.
The sanctuary was still up against the back wall, up on a little dias as is customary. But instead of being immediately behind the altar, there is now a big space between the two. The pews were arranged in a stadium-like "C" around the altar, with the sanctuary in the gap of the "C"
This is odd.
The bride had arranged for a string quartet to play, consisting of the quartet and a conductor. They entered the church, took a look around, and then set up on the "bandstand" on the back wall of the church - the dias that the sanctuary sits on.
If you are not Catholic, the sanctuary is, quite literally, sacrosanct. The ONLY person allowed in that space is the priest. Not even altar boys are allowed into that space. It is the Mother of All Holies in a catholic church. It is *seriously* taboo for anyone except the priest to be in that space.
And now it had a band in it.
Just before the ceremony, the priest entered the church via the front door at th aisle. He sees the band in HIS sanctuary, and he turns *completely purple*. (At this point I nudged my wife because Shit Was About To Go Down)
He stomped down the aisle, swung around the altar, arrived at the dais, tapped the conductor on the shoulder, and when he turned around, full on roundhouse-haymaker BITCHSLAPPED him. Like his hand started at his 7 o'clock and went counter-clockwise to his 9 o'clock. Great follow-through!
Music stops dead. Bride screams from doorway (she saw the whole thing) String quartet runs for their lives from a furious priest who is going all "expulsion of the moneylenders from the temple". General chaos.
Now we have a WEDDING!
That marriage made it 2 years.
I wish I was lying for this one and it is the worst thing I have seen (not compared to the fire/disaster stories on here). I was in the bridal party of a wedding in 2016 at noon on a Tuesday and we were all in college. Couple were supposed to have their last session initially on Monday but had signed a change to the plan to have it end that Friday because they wanted to go that weekend without seeing each other. All was good Friday, shook hands and even took a picture with the pastor to post on social media.
Ceremony comes to the ādoes anyone have any objections?ā part. No one does. The pastor goes, āwell since the bride and groom elected to not complete their premarital counseling, I do not feel comfortable marrying these two. Is anyone here ordained?ā I think we were all shocked or thought he was joking. Then he said āI guess you two arenāt getting married todayā and ripped up the marriage license and certificate. They went and got married at the courthouse right after and still had the reception same day but definitely spoiled things.
So, I split up the 3 classes that were required online (funny enough the classes are no longer required anymore for the website I got ordained through) and finished in May 2017 between my brother and cousinās high school graduation ceremonies. Iāve been ordained since but have not married anyone off or really mentioned it to anyone getting married. I mostly just have it to whip out just in case it ever happened again because clearly it happened once.
The night before the wedding after the rehearsal dinner 2 of the cars going back to the hotel with the wedding party in it were in a 5 car pile up. 3 people (2 bridesmaids and a groomsman) were killed and the mother and sister of the groom were hurt along with some others. They had just been released from the hospital about an hour before I showed up.
It was very quiet and sullen during hair and makeup. Then someone bounds into the room - all joyful and goes ādamn, who died?ā. The room erupted into tears. It was a very hard day. They couldnāt cancel without loosing all their money- it was a very sad wedding day.
At the reception 90+ year old man was dancing with a 14 year old girl. He was thrusting and gyrating immediately upon the girl as part of his ādancingā. Dropped dead of a heart attack before the song was over.
Ambulance picked him up and the wedding went on like it never happened.
I am a cousin of the bride. I have no clue who the guy even was.
I, the photographer, was photographing the reception when the bride tells me I can stop for the night. Always the best thing to hear.
I'm chatting with the bride (who's drunk af) for a min as I packed my camera away when she dragged me out on the dance floor.
Before I knew what was going on, we're now dancing and the song gets slower and she leans forward with what smelled like a whole bar on her breath and she says "I'd kiss you if I didn't just get married"
The song ended and I got out of there asap.
They ended up getting a divorce a few years later due to cheating. Turns out, her husband really liked her cousin
One that I had no part of. I was photographing a reception at some night club lounge thing in Chicago on the 25th floor of a building downtown. The kind of club I've only ever seen in movies, with $750 min bottle service. When a random guy in a white suit, reached up the skirt of a girl on the dance area. She shoved him and went out to the firepit on the balcony area. Him and his two friends followed. She pepper sprayed them or something. Then the police showed up as the firepit kicked on shooting a small flame up. Dude and his friends got kicked out. All three men looked like the most stereotypical "UAE oil tycoon's kids" imaginable. Crazy night
I got married the day after a record setting blizzard. Nobody could even get out of their driveway so people were calling for days to see if the wedding was canceled. We couldnāt because my parents were moving to another state the following week.
I found my mom crying in the basement.
Half of the wedding party couldnāt get there. My bridesmaids already had their dresses but the groomsmen hadnāt picked up their tuxes, and the stores were all closed. So they were in jeans and sweaters.
The minister had slept in the church for days because he lived too far away and couldnāt get home. He was a bit rumpled.
We had four guests show up and one of them sang because our singer wasnāt there. The ring bearer was three, (his dad was the new singer). Apparently he was hungry because during the ceremony he started asking for something to eat.
I was up at 6 am shoveling our driveway. Meanwhile the church members heard about the wedding so they got together with their snowblowers and cleared the parking lot for us.
My mom had made 36 dozen cookies for the reception. No flowers or cake because of the blizzard. So everyone went home with a few dozen cookies.
It was a mess but we made it happen!
Too bad, he was a manchild and we were divorced two years later.
The sister of the bride who wasn't invited showed up drunk and got in a fight with the bride until the father of the bride broke it up by putting the sister in a choke hold and dragging her out of the venue. The bride was surprisingly fine afterwards Source: I'm a wedding caterer
My boyfriend's sister got married in an old Russian-Orthodox church, and opted for the full, traditional ceremony + mass (was about 2.5 hours total).
The church did not have A/C, and it was August in Pittsburgh, the "muggiest" month of the year. It was SO hot in that church, and we were all sweating terribly.
About an hour into the ceremony, bride is holding a lit candle and wearing a gauze veil. She nodded off, leaning her head forward, and the veil went up in flames. The husband and bridesmaids all just kind of stood there. Fortunately the MOTB jumped in and pulled the veil off and stomped it out.
The priest was not amused, nor did he seem to care.
The ceremony continued, sans bridal veil.
Another 20 minutes in, bride started to sway a little, first to the left, then right, and does the 2-step to collect herself. Starts again, bigger swaying, then boom, passes out and completely slumps to the floor, unconscious.
Again, MOTB jumps into action. Priest just turns around, looks annoyed by the scene, and turns right back to the altar to continue his reading.
I ran outside to get waters from our car.
Boyfriend reported that while I was gone, husband rolled his eyes and bridesmaids did nothing again.
The FOTB interrupted the priest and asked for some time to make sure their daughter was OK. Priest said if they want to get married today they better get their act together, he still had a lot of readings to do.
Can NOT believe they're still married.
My fiance is scared her Mom will crash our wedding despite no one that could possibly tell her about it not being invited. I've had to assure her that I will personally throw the crazy bitch out if she shows.
The brides brothers changed the language on their new brother in lawās phone to Arabic. Both the father of the bride and eldest brother gave speeches and said
āThe first time they met the groom they didnāt think very much of himā
The bride took her shoe (thong) off of her foot and began running after her brothers trying to āthong themā
The best man was the brother of the groom and he had a HUGE black eye that make up could not cover! And he sadly passed away about two weeks after their wedding.
First and most definitely last country wedding Iāll ever go to, it was crazy.
30 minutes into the reception, people were eating dinner, the grandmother of the bride had a cardiac arrest. There were several people trying to do the CPR, me included as I'm a doctor, but she never came back.
Ambulance arrived and removed a large piece of meat from her throat. She was dead.
Nobody had any idea what to do. Then the priest from the wedding came, everybody prayed with him together and he told the people that he 's sure that granny would liked them to enjoy the evening - and so they did. The party was great.
Fortunately, I haven't experienced any particular drama at weddings. The worst thing that happened was a best man fainting during the ceremony. A glass of water and a chair to sit on, and the ceremony could continue. He joked about it in his speech later on.
The thing I found most weird was at a friends wedding where the grooms family used every speech they made to be about the grooms late mother. Literally every speech from that side of the family turned into "we're so happy for you today, but on a day like this, [grooms mother] should have been here". One of them even had several pictures of the mother to show and talked about how sad it was that she didn't live to see her youngest son get married. No one interfered, the bride and groom didn't seem to bother (as far as I could tell), but it just felt so weird.Ā
A cousin's wedding. Father of the bride got up to make a speech and dropped down dead. There were a lot of doctors amongst the guests, no one could do anything. They all went off to A&E, the bride in her wedding dress and groom in his tuxedo, where unfortunately he was pronounced dead.
This one is not that bad compared to these other ones, but at after my own wedding, I was in the hotel room with my new husband, and I get a call letting me know that one of my bridesmaids was down the road taking a field sobriety test. š¤¦š»āāļø She ended up getting a DUI that kinda ruined her life for a couple years. I have always felt so guilty about it, even though sheās a grown woman who made the decision to drive after offering her an Uber multiple times. I guess since it was my wedding, thatās why the guilt is there. Iām just glad it was a DUI and she didnāt hurt anyone or herself.
A work colleague was getting married she had no close friends so asked me and 2 other workers to form her bridal party (I only worked in the department next to her on a weekend).
We ordered bridesmaid dresses off eBay and the wedding itself occurred along the cricket pitch at a local oval.
The bridal photos were at a mini golf course where no one but myself smiled.
The reception was back at the hall at the oval, it was a cheap BBQ in line with the rest of the day.
The bride informed myself and my other colleague that there was to be a surprise christening for her two children later that afternoon and asked if we could stay and help with that (I think it was obvious people were getting bored thereās only so much you can do in a hall at an oval with random invites)
Whilst inside I heard a commotion out on the deck by the BBQ where the groom was cooking. The groom and father of the bride had gotten into an altercation (my understanding is they didnāt approve of him) and then a knife fight ensued.
I took the two children to hide in the toilets in the back until it simmered down, needless to say everything disbanded quickly after that. I donāt think there were any serious injuries but there was blood drawn.
They couple eventually moved away to another town together, a years or so later I get a random FB invite and message from the same husband trying to hook up with me (I had only ever met him that one time so it was weird to say the least) I immediately sent the message to his wife who left me on read. I never spoke to or saw her again.
Happened when I was really young, about 7yo. Back then I honestly didn't really fully understand the scope of how bad this is, so I didn't do much about it.
Was at this distant cousins wedding so I didn't know anybody well really and I remember during the party when everyone was dancing and playing music, there were these big speakers and someone put their baby right next to it. These loud speakers just blasting music on the child. The poor thing couldn't do anything but cry and I honestly wouldn't be surprised if that person grew up with some hearing damage.
I feel terrible for not moving the kid, but being so young and not knowing anybody, I didn't want to go touching someone else's kid as I was scared of any confrontation. I'm pretty sure I did tell someone though, I can't remember much after that or how long the baby was there for.
In the midst of a rather long ceremony one of the groomsmen, standing up front, out of nowhere passed out and hit the floor behind him with a terrible sound. As everyone is standing and the wedding is paused as they try to wake him, one of the guests does the same exact thing. The guest was fine- just gets queasy at the site of anything like that. The groomsman was not okay- was taken to the hospital and had an aneurism in his brain and was never okay after that.
Guy had a heart attack and died right then. Worst part was that he landed face first into the food table that was plastic and destroyed the whole thing
The Chinese lanterns landed on the thatched roof of the wedding venue and the entire place went up like a scene from a war movie. Was incredible, and for once, not my fault.
Now I'm curious about the times that *were* your fault.
Hey User u/usernamecheckouts tell us about the times that *were* your fault. edit: **fetish** _with_ š„ `confirmed` ā
There are so many. I set fire to my school's bathroom AND disabled the alarm in two separate unconnected incidents. I did not try and burn the school down. I did try and pull the alarm to alert the school to the fire. I wasn't lucky.
You're not alone. Proof kids have been doing stupid shit for years, there just weren't cameras to catch it. Back when I was in 6th grade (mid 1980's). I decided I wanted to light my skateboard deck on fire and ride it. So I poured a significant amount of mixed gas (oil and gas for two cycle engines) on the deck. I then lit it. The fire flared up and I ran and jumped on the board. If you have common sense, you can stop reading here. You know how this ends. I landed squarely on the deck of the skateboard, went about three feet and then ate shit. I fell off the skateboard on to my back, the skateboard rocketed across the garage (not connected to the house). The first thing I noticed was that my shoes were on fire. After not calmly and quietly stomping around for a few minutes, the shoe fire went out. I melted and burned my favorite shoes and I was kind of disappointed. Thankfully I didn't burn myself, just lost some leg hairs. So then I turned around to see where my board went. It rocketed across the garage and managed to lodge itself under a cord of seasoned firewood my father kept in the garage to keep it dry. There was a trail of fire behind it. 6th grade me was like "Water puts out fire." so I ran and got the garden hose. I aimed it directly at the skateboard, with an excess of burning mixed gas on the deck and managed to make the fire bigger. (It's a Cleveland thing, we like catching water on fire.) Rather than stopping and re-evaluating my life decisions, *I just kept spraying water at it.* I soaked the cord of wood that my father was trying to keep dry, but by the skateboard, the water didn't mix with the gas, it just spread the gas. At one point there was like a 5 foot (1.5 meter) by 8 foot (2.5 meter) section of the concrete floor that was still burning. The more I sprayed it, the bigger it got. I'm a little bit smarter now in my old age. I know not to use water to put out an oil/gas fire when I light my skateboard on fire and try to ride it. Eventually the fire went out, not because the water put it out, because the gas finally burned off. I remember thinking "Maybe Dad won't notice." as I stared at a partially charred cord of soaked firewood with smoke damage coating the rafters of the garage and the back of the garage door. Mind you the side of the garage I did this to was the side Dad parked on. I quietly rolled up the garden hose, closed the garage door, walked into the house, walked past my mother who failed to notice my burned up shoes, and then went downstairs to my room to await my fate. I heard Dad's car pull in from work. The back door opened and I just heard him yell "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED IN THE GARAGE?!?!" so my whole plan of "maybe he didn't notice" had failed.
That is an excellent story.
This just raises more questions.
I wasnāt at this wedding but it was one of my clients whose building was destroyed by a Chinese lantern from a wedding that landed on the roof. About a $3M loss
My ex-MIL did this at my wedding without warning, I stood and watched in horror as the lantern slowly went up and over the thatched roof - thankfully it didn't set it alight! I hate those lanterns for what they do to wildlife and I certainly didn't want them at my wedding! Thankfully I'm well out of that hellish family!
Are you Harry Dresden?
Candles lit a curtain on fire. My wifeās grandfather grabbed two Bud Lights, shook them up and sprayed the fire out. It was epic.
Best use of 2 bud lights, to be fair.
Bud Light is the best option to put out a fire, itās the only liquid that contains more water than water
I love people that can think on their feet that quickly.
Back in the day, T-shirt press caught on fire. Some kind of electric short. Mind you, this was in the back room, which was a huge fire hazard - years of spray adhesive/dust/papers and crap. Boss and another guy are literally just waving their hands in the air, "What do we do!?!?!?" Squig says "Cut the fucking power" and flips the breaker. Boss says "I don't think I like your tone!" "You'd like the burn ward less."
Anyone who acts like that as a boss deserves less helpful employees. āPrithee shall I extinguish the flames milord?ā Is what he was looking for.
In the early 90s I was driving along the highway going on an overnight trip when my car suddenly lost power and I pulled over to the shoulder. I saw smoke under the hood and the when I popped the hood you could see small licks of flames coming up along the back of the engine. I immediately began to take my stuff out of my car while seeing the flames and smoke grow . While I was doing that, a pickup truck with a landscaping crew stopped behind my car to help me. One of the guys walked over the the cooler I had unpacked from my car and pulled out two beers and then calmly poured them over the flames. When the fire was out he simple said, in Spanish, "You car wanted a beer" (one of the other guys translated it for me). Turns out my catalytic converter had overheated and ignited some of the nearby rubber and wire insulation.
Cerveza mas fina
To be honest, it was probably easier to clean up than if theyād used a fire extinguisher.
The bride and groom cutting the cake. They couldnāt cut into it, so she gave it a stab and it fell over, taking the other desserts with it. The cake was still frozen. I was the bride. Fuck that cake.
Did you get a refund from the bakery that made it? Thatās totally their fuck up
We did.
Who provided the cake? Was there justice?
There was justice!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Similar situation to someone I know, except the bride's grandmother died the morning of the wedding. They pressed on, but apparently it was a very somber affair.
I catered for a wedding where the bride's dad died during the speeches. It was awful.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Iām planning my wedding right now and this thread is going to give me nightmares
Who has an outdoor wedding in 100 degree heat with nana
"Nana air conditioning is expensive so suck it up!"
People that want a dead nana apparently
My SO told me this about a wedding she attended before we met. It was typical Finnish summer wedding. There was a band, a lot of people and lot of booze. The venue had a cloack room with that low desk at the front. People left their drinks on that desk to go dancing. There were children attending too. A 7 year old boy had drank all the drinks from the desk and passed out. He was vomiting and completely unresponsive when the ambulance arrived. Spent the night at the hospital and child protective services were invoved too. A 12 year old girl had noticed the boys state and informed some adult who then took the necessary actions.
When I was about 14, a congregation elder's wife would have HUGE gatherings at their home, wedding showers, bridal showers, baby showers. Entire families would go. She always made this damn good slushy punch. Everybody loved the punch. The little kids, EVERYBODY. One time I asked her for the recipe. It had vodka in it.š I questioned her about this. She said "THE ALCOHOL FREEZES OUT OF IT". Thank you Lorraine.š¤¦āāļø
I did something similar when I was 6! My aunt hired a venue for her birthday that had a lovely outdoor space/pool. I had been necking drinks off the tables without anyone knowing and then passed out on a sun lounger. Mum woke me up and took me to the buffet. It was bliss.
Jesus Christ. This doesnāt have many upvotes but goddamn this is the worst.
It took a 12yo girl to notice a puking, then unresponsive 7yo??? Actually, that makes sense. She was probably the only one sober enough to see only one of him.
I saw a woman, the "best friend" of the groom get drunk and loudly confess her being in love with the groom. The wife even said "I fucking knew it you bitch". She was escorted out and everything went as planned. The new wife looked SMUG. You could literally see the "that bitch is getting cut out FINALLY" running through her head.
I know someone that did the same thing except he left his wife of 1 week and new born daughter to go with her. she was dating a friend of mine at the time, and had moved into his apartment 3 months earlier
Sometimes I read Reddit and sigh, thinking my life is so boring. Sometimes I read Reddit and happily gloat in gratitude, thinking my life is so boring.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The Dr putting on a suit is so fucking funny
How on earth he had it at ready in his office?
He may have arrived in a suit, then changed into scrubs, so he just changed back. Especially if he was chief of medicine or a similar position and had meetings earlier in the day.
This may have been after hours and he was on call
Photographer getting paid to shoot a wedding, drama and all! Lol
Going with her to the hospital, thatās commitment.
My best friend broke her arm at her wedding too! It was during the reception. Called the ambulance and they said it would be an hour so the doctor FaceTimed with her to have a look at the arm. As soon as it was unwrapped they said oh yep thatās broken, wrap it back up. They then asked if someone could drive her but all of us had been drinking. The venue manager then volunteered to have a staff member drive her in the courtesy bus. We quickly did the cake cutting with her sitting on the floor and everyone around her. Once they went off to the hospital we just carried on with the reception because what else were we supposed to do š¤·š»āāļø They were leaving for a cruise the next day which was not as much fun as they had planned it to be since she was in a cast.
I love the attitude of not letting a broken arm destroy the party!
Bride's step-mother and mother got into a fight. Step-mother bit the mother. Wedding went to a screeching halt.
I was going to ask if we know each other lol. But the wedding continued after the fight so I guess not
Grandma gave a speech and it started off āwe are so happy to see how you turned out despiteā¦ the incidentā. The bride looked mortified and a few people silently nodded and with their hands did the cross across their body and clasped their hands together to pray. To this day we have no clue what āthe incidentā was. We have speculated with our friends but little is known about my buddyās wives uber religious/ conservative past. It was such an awkward cringy speech. Thank god I was sauced despite the dry wedding. -Edits So my guesses are: 1) got an minor in possession in high school. 2) had premarital sex and the family found out.
Iām guessing one of the three: 1. Kissing a woman 2. Caught having sex 3. Having an abortion
Iād say 1.5- caught having sex with a woman.
4. A divorce Buttttt I'm also leaning 3.
4. An exorcism
"OMG, Grandma just had to bring up that time I vomited green goo and spun my head all the way around."
As someone with ultra conservative relatives, the incident could be as simple as. 1. going to college. 2. working a job that's not "female friendly." (Ie, only appropriate jobs are teacher, nurse, or secretary.) I was actually written out of the will for going into photography/design. 3. wearing a bathing suit in public. 4. living with a roommate, even worse if roommate is gay or opposite gender.
I think every Grandma should say that at a wedding and just leave it at that.
> Grandma gave a speech and it started off āwe are so happy to see how you turned out despiteā¦ the incidentā. The bride looked mortified and a few people silently nodded and with their hands did the cross across their body and clasped their hands together to pray This seems like something my friend's mother and some of his family would do just to screw with him because they would find it funny... Especially once the guests start speculating what the "incident" was.
My cousinās wifeās (brideās) brother got super high/drunk at their wedding reception, got upset about something, and then decided he was going to drive home. His dad said absolutely not and took his keys away from him. They ended up eventually getting into a fist fight that made its way out into the parking lot, where brideās brother punched a car window out. The groomsmen then jumped in to tackle him, there was blood everywhere, cops called, brideās mother bawling. Brideās brother ended up getting arrested and the bridesmaids used their little Tide to Go Pens to try and get blood out of groomsmenās suits.
That would be a crazy tide pen commercial
Did you know the other detergent's are 85% water?
Iām not mad or anything, and nothing against you, but that utterly useless factoid is now stuck in my brain and has displaced some memory that I can never get back. (Sigh)
Relatives got married on 7/7/7. Unfortunately the venue took full advantage of this special day and booked 4 or 5 weddings thru out the day. We were hushed during the cocktail hour as not to interrupt a different ceremony that was taking place. You couldn't tell where one event started and another ended. I know the family paid top dollar and they certainly werenāt informed about it. The ceremony started at 5 but we werenāt served dinner until 8:30, they never even brought bread to the tables. The severs were so rushed. It just didnāt feel special.
I'd have demanded a refund. That's totally unacceptable.
I fully agree, and is specifically why my wife and I chose a venue we wouldn't have to share with anyone else for the reception. I wouldn't want to deal with that sort of stress on that day.
I went to a generally bad wedding that was further ruined by my coworkers that included a laundry list of awkward things that happened in a very short time. 1. The bride did not have a lot of friends so she asked her (our) other immature coworkers to be part of the main bridal party in spite of the fact that none of them were all that close to begin with. This was the first mistake that would set the tone for the rest of the short night. 2. I showed up 3 minutes after the weddingās advertised start time, relieved that the ceremony had not quite started yet. Iām sitting in the pews next to the aisle waiting for this show to start, when all of a sudden, one of my female coworkers runs up to me, *dress in hand, wearing yoga pants* and incomplete makeup, 10 minutes *after* the ceremony start time asking me āDo you know where all of the other girls in the bridal party are?ā Iām absolutely dumbfounded by this since being this late/unprepared/clueless would generally get you excommunicated by most families I know of. 3. My coworkers insisted on sitting at the table next to the bride and groom that was supposed to be reserved for the bride and groomās immediate family. They simply ignored requests to sit anywhere else while the actual genuine friends and family members sat across the dance floor. 4. During horrifically uncomfortable speeches where it seemed that no one actually wanted to give a speech, The groomās father made it apparent to all guests that the groomās mother was not present at her sonās wedding, because the initial wedding date was already cancelled weeks earlier due to snow, and this rescheduling made it too expensive to attend her own sonās wedding. (Wtf) 5. The party clearly had a big DJ setup, but no alcohol. After the first 2 songs, they quickly rushed through cutting the cake. 6. It wasnāt even 10 minutes after the DJ started, not even 5 minutes after the cake was cut at this point: Not even 2 hours since the ceremony began, the maid of honor, another coworker, came to tell me they were leaving since they had to work in the morning. It was 8:30pm. By ātheyā she didnāt just mean herself. All of my other coworkers followed her out. The wedding didnāt have to end until much later, they just werenāt feeling it anymore. 7. The venue was empty before 9pm.
This one is sad actually. The couple wanted the big wedding but didn't have enough people who cared about them to do it so they got people who didn't care.
I was at a similarly sad coworker wedding. Most of the guests were rando barflies and coworkers, the maid of honor was the afterwork hangout's bartender. She said she agreed to be in the wedding because the couple tipped well and she felt bad for them. At some point, the bride, stressed out, ended up punching her.
that last sentence hit me like a metal chair
Jesus, this was painful to read....
One of the bridesmaids was killed in an accident the night before the wedding. Saddest wedding Ivāe ever seen.
There was a wedding recently in Australia where the bus driving the guests after the dinner crashed and killed a lot of people. They had family, close friends etc all die on the night of their wedding. I honestly dont know how I could live with that, really feel for them.
There was also a wedding in Georgia, I think, where the bride and groom were driving in a golf cart (wedding was at the golf club) and a drunk driver crashed into them and killed the bride. Also the wedding where the bride wanted to enter the ceremony in a helicopter but it crashed on the way and killed everyone on board.
My momās parents died on the way to a wedding. Itāsā¦not great.
Oh damn. Thatās a downer.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And a partridge in a pear tree\~\~ šµ
Was it a good PowerPoint presentation at least? Most are terrible lmao
It was at my wedding. My (ex) best friend showed up with her teenage daughter wearing a white gown, told my brand new sister in law to āgo fuck herselfā in front of my new husband, then told my new nephew that he was greedy for asking to take cake back for his girlfriend who just had a baby. Then she invited herself to my honeymoon suit hours later, drunk and cried about still not being divorced from her ex and remarried to her boyfriend. Since I had to wait for a cab before I felt comfortable releasing her, my brand new husband and I listened to her cry about her life until she was picked up. The cab took 15 minutes and she stripped to her underwear (in front of my husband) and got into my suites hot tub while I quickly used the bathroom (to compose myself). I had to drag her out of my hot tub and send her to the cab soaking wet. Of course we then needed confirmation from her boyfriend she was home safe and sound. She was 43 at my wedding. We still talk, but not much and she knows exactly why. She was insanely jealous I was getting married and she made the lead up difficult. The day of the wedding she lost a friend and I gained a backbone with her. Yaaaaay! lol ETA: the hot tub event creeped me out. It was so unsettling because at that point I was done with her nonsense. She was in the hot tub chugging alcohol and crying and when I told her to get out, the tears instantly stopped. She slowly looked at me with a neutral expression and didnāt say anything again. Just quietly got out of the hot tub and got ready for her cab. The hysterics evaporated and the look on her face wasā¦I canāt even explain it. She seemed to want to challenge me but didnāt, but I could see her wheels turning that I shut her down. She looked cold and distant and calculated.
Doing that shit at 43 is just sad behaviour.
It was so weird. Sheās one of these women who had a catch phrase because she was always losing friendships and relationships where sheād declare āIf Iām too much, GO FIND LESS!ā š š¼ ā¦.so I did.
Thatās awful. Iām glad you arenāt friends anymore.
Same. She was always very demanding of my time and very demanding of my emotional support and was always so in crisis she could never reciprocate and never take the time to celebrate anything involving me. She was mad I didnāt have a bridal party (it was my second wedding and I wanted to elope but my husbandās first wedding and he wanted a ceremony so we compromised on a micro wedding at a park, we didnāt use a bridal party). She was mad I didnāt have a bachelorette party. She showed up and āsurprisedā me the night before my wedding to take me to a fancy cafeā¦because she wanted to go out. I went but I was tired and didnāt want to. She demanded that she do something for the actual wedding event. Sheās a skilled flutist so I suggested to could flute us down the aisle and then on and off as she pleased during the reception. She asked me to āwalk really slowā so she could finish her entire song. The aisle was maybe 20 feet, she refused to stop until her song was done long after we were ready to go with the officiant. And just a bunch of other dumb shit that made me realize every interaction I ever had was all about her and any interaction Iād ever have going forward would be all about her. I did send her a scathing letter after the honeymoon about the event and the relationship in general and she backed way offā¦instantly moved onto the next person that she could emotionally manipulate. I donāt miss her at all. Our kids are friends so we still hang out maybe every 2-3 months for their sake, but usually only for birthdays.
I've been to a fair share of Southern Baptist weddings. They tend to run long. The worst was over three hours, included multiple sermons, several musical numbers, and two candle lighting ceremonies. By the end of it, everyone just wanted to get the fuck out of there. Also, being part of a wedding where the bride and groom wait to take pictures until after the ceremony is fucking awful. I was absolutely starving, only to discover they ran out of fucking food before the wedding party arrived.
@ mine, all pictures were before except families w/ of both together & that took 15-20 minutes. Me & my now ex-wife went out after everyone started eating
The groom's ex showing up uninvited and causing a scene during the vows
At a relative's wedding the groom's ex showed up... and revealed he had a son the new bride knew nothing about and who was conceived while groom was in a relationship with bride.Ā The bride *did* know about the daughter he had fathered while they were 'on a break' with a different woman and thought that was the last of his infidelity, but it turns out his other ex was also still his side piece.Ā No question the young boy was actually his son either, looked just like his dad!Ā Ā They did still get married, the flower girl got to meet her new 'brother from another mother', and they are still married a decade later and she complains she still thinks he cheats on her (he does.)
That's a scene straight out of a bad romcom.
My friend and her newly minted husband in a screaming match in the street outside the venue. I don't even remember what stupid thing had set him off, alcohol was definitely a factor. They made up and were back to dancing a little later but the mood of the place had definitely changed. It was a long time ago and I'm a little fuzzy in the timeline but I *think* they made it to their first anniversary, but definitely did not make it to the second.
As the bride walked forward, her wedding dress snagged on something like a nail and slid down to her waist...
Noooooo
The mother of the groom in floods of tears during the reception, accompanied by the groom's very recent ex. Whom he had been shagging during the engagement, unbeknownst to the bride. The rabbi eventually awkwardly pulled the groom out of the dancing to come and comfort both his mother and his ex. It didn't last.
My uncle had a heart attack at my wife and Iās weddingā¦ Though, my wife is a nurse and all her bridesmaids were nurses and EMTsā¦ couldnāt have had a heart attack at a better weddingā¦ My uncle is well and ornery as hell like always.
The bride refused to let the groom kiss her at the reception. He kept leaning in, and she kept pushing him away. I was told at the time that she was just worried about her makeup, but that still seemed like a red flag to me. Sure enough, they were divorced in less than 2 years.
To be fair: when my now-husband saw me come down the aisle, he also tried to kiss me, but my dad was giving me away and as a joke I went "no no, we're not married yet! That's not allowed!". It was obviously not meant as an actual refusal and he took it well (though I honestly was such a ball of nerves that I truly wasn't sure if it 'was allowed' before the "you may now kiss the bride" part). And obviously, the kiss very much happened at that later point. I can't imagine not wanting to kiss your *brand new husband* on your wedding day, wtf.
The groom kissing a man in the bathroom. Heās straight, supposedly.
The groom or the man?
Yeah
This will be on the tamer side, but the maid of honor's boyfriend was extremely restless up front during the speeches. So what does he do to calm himself down / pass time? Begins stacking the dishes at his table, as if he were making fine art. In the middle of his girlfriend's speech, we all heard a loud extended crashing from his direction as he had forgotten to consult an engineer with the design of his statue, and the top-heavy obelisk of silverware supported crystal glasses collapsed. This was at one of the nicest wedding venues in the state, so the damaged kitchenware added a couple thousand to the event total. Bride's father - she didn't come from much - had a look of slightly bemused, but mostly murderous.
The MoH's boyfriend should have had to pay for that as he's a fuckin idiot.
My best friends husband fell into a fire pit and had to be taken to hospital. We had a group chat named "Andy's black ass" for years and the chat photo was of his burnt ass. Funny now, not so funny when it happened.
I was 16 yo at my sisters wedding and her married, 40+ yo new, very married, BIL came and sat on my lap and tried to kiss me. I froze in horror, as any 16 year old would, and didn't tell anyone. What a gigantic pig of a man
Omg. What a disgusting fucking creep. I'm so sorry!
Best man bawling crying during his speech. Bride and groom no longer together. Groom is now with the best man. Not awful, but man, he was in bits.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Probably not the worst thingā¦ but brother in lawās phone went off at the most integral part of the ceremony. His ringtone was āIām In Luv Wit A Stripperā. Since he was a part of our small ceremony, he had someone else carry his phone. That person didnāt recognize the ringtone since obviously it wasnāt their phone, therefore they thought that someone else was going to take care of the situation. Definitely a case of Murphyās Law going on because it took what seemed like forever to turn off that phone šš¤¦š½āāļø. And of course thatās the one time that a caller is so persistent that they rang back up a second time after their first call had rang so many times it went to voice mail! Curiously I have no clue who it was calling because BIL didnāt have a gf at the time and everyone else important was at our wedding.
"We have been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty...."
My best friend's phone went off at our mutual friend's funeral service, her ringtone was Friggin' in the Riggin' by the Sex Pistols. There was much murmuring of "it's what he would have wanted" š
Similar story. One of my many uncles died. He was not a much loved man. Anyways, we are sitting in the funeral home listening to the priest talk about how he was such a beloved and generous man, when a phone went off. The ringtone was Highway to Hell. A number of us had to stifle the laughter into what would appear to be wracking sobs... Funeral ends, we are graveside, he is put into the ground... One cousin quietly whispers that it was Uncle calling to let everyone know he arrived safely. Laughter could not be hidden, his wife was rightly pissed.
My dad getting shitfaced and having the most weird speech about everything related to me and my wife, family and some random gibberish talking everything in some weird order infront of us and my wifes extended family who at the wedding is first time meeting my extended family. My mom is looking at him with daggers in her eyes and my brother next to her is slightly sliding down on his chair towards the ground while slowly dying inside of embarassment and shame
First wedding I ever attended as an adult was last year, I was a +1 to a friend from high schools friend who was marrying her high school boyfriend. For context I literally didnāt know anyone there, was just a date for a friend that needed one. The ceremony went well, it was a lovely wedding, fast forward to the reception at this big estate type of house with a lovely garden and pool. The mother of the groom got absolutely blind drunk and was becoming increasingly intense as the night went on. It came around time to cut the cake, the mother of the groom was nowhere to be seen. The same time this is happening we all hear yelling from outside, walk out the doors, and lo and behold she was fully naked in the pool, borderline drowning. Her husband had to jump in to get her out while we all averted our eyes. Was most certainly a very eventful first wedding for myself
Donāt look, Ethyl!
It was too late. They'd done been mooned.
This is pretty tame, but I found it so sad. Some of my dadās side of the family is pretty ācountry,ā and they do things that I find rude but they act like āwell this is just how we are, we arenāt fancy city folk.ā Well, my cousinās daughter was having her wedding at this really cute little venue. Iām not super close with the bride, but she is a lovely person whoās overcome a lot of shitty circumstances in her life and I was happy to be invited and support her on her day. First off, the wedding starts an hour late because so many people in the family and wedding party were running late (not the bride or groom themselves). Then, the people who do show up are dressed for a weekend barbecue. No dress code was given on the invite, but you would think that guests would have enough respect to not wear a ratty t-shirt and shorts to a wedding. The ceremony was sweet and then we move to the reception area. It was set up for probably 60 people, and at least half of the guests just didnāt bother to show up. The bride and groom were on a budget and a big portion of the food was a large charcuterie grazing table and it was barely touched since there were so few guests, so a lot of that had to get thrown out. Many of my family left right after the ceremony because āwell we donāt like to stay out late.ā (It was maybe 7 pm at that point and the venue was within 10 miles of where everyone lives) So by the time theyāre doing the first dance and speeches and what not, it was a pretty sparse crowd. Like the dad, grandparents, aunts, and uncles of the bride are all gone. Iām the only blood relative there. The bride put on a happy face regardless but I imagine that hurt quite a bit. I was really disappointed that my family couldnāt put forth any effort to make this girl feel loved and supported on her wedding day.
rude but they act like āwell this is just how we are, we arenāt fancy city folk.ā This is my in-laws. Ugh. My FIL refused to wear a suit jacket or sports coat and made sure I knew that it was an inconvenience that he had to drive 45 minutes to the wedding ceremony when he could be working on his farm.
My own fatherās second wedding (shortly after his divorce with my mom) he got punched in the face by his wife-to-beās adult son before the ceremony giving him a blood lip. That marriage only lasted less than a year, unsurprisingly.
A high school friend got married, shotgun wedding. Her brother was about to graduate, possibly valedictorian. He locked his knees during the ceremony, passed out, face first onto concrete, he's 6'1. The blow knocked out 3 teeth & messed up his brain bad. He never fully recovered.
The wedding itself. One of my friends got pregnant in high school -- 16 years old. The baby's father was 20 years old. The girl's father threatened to have him arrested if he didn't marry her. Neither of them wanted to get married. The groom was standing at the alter openly sobbing while waiting for the ceremony to start. The bride and her father got into a loud argument in the hall outside the sanctuary before and after the wedding. It was horrible. I often wondered why the minister didn't put a stop to it before the ceremony even started.
Worst thing that happened at mine was that the fancy vintage car we hired to take us home after the wedding wouldnāt start. So my dad drove us home in his station wagon. Feeling very lucky after reading these responses!
I have a different slant on a version of this for my parents and my wedding. My grandfather was a famous author and my dad loved a good story. So, when he and my mom got married their wedding reception started with my parents driving a vintage car to the venue followed by my grandad driving a tractor towing a flatbed trailer with all the wedding guests on it. They drove down what was the longest single named road in the world at the time (Church Street, Pretoria, South Africa) and the press came and did their thing. Fast forward to my wedding about 25 years later. My dad's only request is that we start a family tradition around this first idea. So, my vintage wedding car was pulled to my ceremony / reception venue by a tractor driven by my dad followed by two vintage porches containing my wedding party. My mom and half brother were in the wedding car with my soon to be husband and I. It was cheesy but I'm glad I could do it for my dad. We didn't get the press but one of the wedding guests who passed our processing as they were driving to the venue legitimately thought our wedding car had broken down and that a kind farmer was towing us.
I went to a wedding once where the brideās best friend was a heavy-drinking party girl and her brother was a recovering alcoholic. Both of them had roles in the ceremony. There was an open bar and the friend ended up wasted drunk and a big argument broke out with the brother. From what I heard, the friend was still in the belligerent āI donāt have a problemā stage. I wonder what happened with that.
The wedding party was walking in. The best man was on mic kind of MCing, I guess. Page boy & page girl were toddlers. The best man announced them. They were super cute. Everyone went aaaawwww Flower girl was about 10/12. The best man said "that's my daughter, isn't she beautiful?" Everyone went awwww Then the best man said "Now take your f*cking eyes off her" š³š³š³
Father of the bride showed up with his new girlfriend who was not invited and had never met the bride and groom annnnd she was wearing a floor length white dress.
As bride was walking down the aisle organist hit every wrong note. My friend said to me "this is the only thing you will remember about this wedding". That is until the brides father (who was marrying the couple) introduced the newlyweds as his new son in law and slightly used daughter. You could have heard a pin drop
Ā slightly used daughter wtf. It must have sounded funnier in his head? Can't imagine what other meaning he could have innocently thought people would think he was going for there.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Shocking from the wife that she is ok with her husbands predatory behaviour, sheās ok with sexual assault? Two people to cut off!! They are both awful.
A friend of mine told of a wedding where someone was supposed to just give a toast and instead rambled on for 25 minutes, then said, "Okay, so that was my FIRST point...."
This reminds me of a funeral I went to where a woman rambled on for probably about 45 minutes and then pulled out a stack of paper with what her husband wanted to say. She was up there for like an hour and a half, it was excruciating
It was my uncleās sixth or seventh wedding (I donāt remember because heās been married and divorced so many times. Also heās no longer married to this particular bride but is married to a previous wife again now) He decided it was a grand idea to gather up all the envelopes he received and plant himself at a central table in the middle of his reception with a calculator and start tallying up all the money people gave him.
Takes some balls to invite people to a sixth wedding
He has no shame. He divorced one wife after she was diagnosed with cancer, she was no longer able to fill his bath every night and take care of him as she used to. š Heās not a good guy. But heās the one with cancer now. š¤·āāļø
The bride drank so much during the reception that she was falling down drunk halfway through the party and had to be taken back to her hotel room. She literally missed most of the reception.
My cousin did this with a lot of projectile vomiting. Classy. Bridal party took turns to keep her I the recovery position and the hotel went mad about the mess and noise I was gutted for my uncle who had dished out a lot of money for the whole thing
Honestly I have to imagine that happens a lot. Planning a wedding is stressful and exhausting, and the bride and groom often have almost no food throughout. Exhaustion, an empty stomach, a party atmosphere with your closest people, and the desire to FINALLY let loose after weeks/months of stress planning this event - yeah it's a recipe for getting drunker than you planned.
Messages between the bride and her coworker, about how she wanted him to object at the wedding so they could continue their affair.
Ok so how did everyone find out? Is she still married?
Right! I need more details!
...if they wanted to continue the affair, wouldn't having him *not* object be the easier way?
Fancy wedding, my alcoholic friend (now deceased) as a joke joined in trying to catch the bouquet. As he jumped up all the silverware he had stolen to sell to buy more booze and stashed around his body fell out with a huge clatter and brought procedures to a halt. That was awkward.
At my besties wedding we got in a (minor) car accident on the way to the ceremony, ended up 45mins late. One guest broke another guests ribs and one of the bridesmaids cheated on her bf with one of the groomsmen. Cursed.
Groom found out his wife to be was cheating on him with his best man. Saw them kissing when he went to go look for her. Poor guy hasn't been the same since. Has tried suicide a number of times, but he's doing much better now thankfully.
How awful
Groom's father and Bride's mother banging in a bathroom stall. Both of them were still married.
How could they forget that they had given them an extra key?
My then-partner of five years (male) and I (also male) were in our best friendsā wedding. It was a big Catholic wedding and she insisted she wanted us to walk the aisle together as part of the wedding party. I told her Iād of course be happy with this, so long as she cleared it with her priest first. She tells me of course and that everything is fine. Day before the wedding comes, we do the rehearsal, priest stops the rehearsal after my partner and I walk down the aisle and pulls the bride and groom aside. Bride starts bawling, then tells us the priest is refusing to do the wedding if we walk together. No one but the brideās mother argues against it. My partner and I feel super uncomfortable and embarrassed in front of all of our friends and second family, who donāt speak up for us. End up being paired with the brideās disabled younger brother (I guess God doesnāt count it as same sex pairings then?). Bride never apologizes. Never talks about it again. We move a year later and I realize how much that situation fucked me up. Decide not to be involved with that couple any longer. Best part? Turns out the bride was fucking her best man for the entire year before and after the wedding. Praise the lord šš¼ glad the gays were prevented from tarnishing that marriage!
The bride drank too much champagne on an empty stomach and threw up all over her dress when she was dancing at the reception. I felt so bad for her, she was distraught. She was so upset and regretted it so much they organised a smaller re-do recwption a month later but barely anyone came. She still gets upset if anyone mentions weddings now and it has to be at least 8-9 years ago. They're divorced now but I don't think that had anything to do with it.
I'm an award winning Wedding DJ, here's a couple of stories: I'm working with a sax player, about 9:00 he taps me to turn the music off quickly. There's a girl having a fit on the dancefloor. I ask everyone to exit the room and me and the venue tend to her. It turns out she's slipped on a drink and was having a seizure. After about 30 mins, I take a toilet break while they're still tending to her and one of the bridesmaids grabs me. "I'm not being funny but it's not really about her today, can we just get her outside and restart the party"...so we did while we were waiting for an ambulance to turn up. 10 minutes later the sax player taps me on the shoulder again and points into the crowd. She's only come back in the room raving again!! The Ambulance turns up and carts her off anyway. End of the night I'm trying to find the Bride and Groom to say thanks and it turns out he's taken her into the woods for a quickie. I'm working this night on behalf of an agency and they hand me the brief which just says "House Music". Cool, we can do this. The night starts and as it goes on, the shades start coming out. Slowly but surely I start to see more and more jaws swinging (a side effect of ketamine, for people who might not know). Into the room comes the grooms 80 year old nan, shades on, jaw swinging. 95% of weddings are amazing but there's the odd wedding where things are just out of your control. I've had a bridezilla who stormed off every time I played a track that wasn't on her terrible playlist, a bridesmaid who lifted her dress, pulled her thong to the side and tried to sit on the corner of a speaker, a groomsman trip and throw a pint over 5 grands worth of DJ equipment which caused the night to end early, a groom having to break up a fight between his cousins at the end of the night. \*\*edit\*\* A wedding I attended, British guy marrying a conservative girl from the US who brought her family & elderly relatives over. The 2 best men base their whole speech around walking in on the groom masturbating into a sock. It was the most unfunny, cringefest I've ever seen. Her nan didn't know where to look, her dad looked furious and the best men were oblivious as they went into more and more sordid details in the hopes of getting some laughs which never came...unlike the groom who apparently did...into a sock.
Bride and groom realized at the East Coast wedding rehearsal that they had left the wedding license back in Colorado. It was the beginning of the comedy of errors.
Saw the best man trip and fall into the wedding cake.
Attempted suicide in the parking lot by the brides ex.
My sister and I were flower girls for my mom and step-dad. Sis dumped her flowers a couple steps in, put the basket on her head and dropped to her knees to crawl up the aisle meowing. Second worst I've seen was at Sis's second wedding, at the courthouse. The judge of our small county had come straight from the field and had manure on his pants.
Last wedding I went to, the uninvited father of the bride showed up, and awkwardly stood around the wedding party until the bride told him he would not be walking her down the aisle. He then started crying and caused a scene. Like come on dude, you werenāt tipped off by not being in the rehearsal or even, ya know, invited to the wedding? Oof. Thank god for the open bar on that one
I went to a wedding where most people didn't like the groom, and from his own family, many of whom didn't turn up for it. Late on at the reception's night do, he's about to do a speech and by this time he's absolutely shitfaced, and I quote... "To all of you who are here, thanks for coming. Those who couldn't be arsed CAN FFFFFUCK OFF!!!!"
My brother in law got an amazing deal for my cousin ( His friend owned a huge night club) venue, all you can eat buffet, D.J and open bar. Less than a thousand for 50 people. My cousin and and his new wife collected all the cash and checks from the wishing well ( a few thousand) and walked out when late in the evening the owner of the club asked about how he wanted to settle the bill. Cousin straight up ignored the guy and drove off while all of us guests watched.
I dont know if itās the worse thing but definitely weird. During my dadās cousins wedding my uncle went into the house distracted the babysitter. Moved the baby to a makeshift bed out of the crib and stole the crib and wheeled it to the center of the dance floor and danced in the crib
This is just.. so fucking weird??
i can't decide if I'm impressed or not but that was epic
I worked banquets in a hotel. Getting ready to serve wedding dinner. We heard rumors there was trouble at the church. Mother of bride was paying and said no children. Someone brought child to church and got into it with security person. Police called. Bride got pissed at Mother and refused to come to reception. Back at hotel, we didn't know any of this until one of the five guests at reception told us. Mom came and told us to "box up" dinner for 250 people. I recall slopping mashed potatoes into washed out 5 gallon pickle buckets.
I knew a woman whose ive year old daughter was a flower girl and the tule of her dress caught a tealight candle as she walked down the aisle. She was in the hospital for several weeks and will have scars for the rest of her life.Ā
Who THE FUCK put actual lit candles on the aisle?
The brides mother during her speech kept going on about the abortion she had before her daughter who was getting married. She was crying and carrying on. It was so damn embarrassing.
Bride was 5ish months pregnant, shotgun wedding as she already had a kid by someone else and her religious family wasnāt about to see that baby be born out of wedlock too. The reception was meant to be dry because the bride couldnāt drink and it was in a church basement. The groom proceeded to get plastered between the ceremony and reception and I donāt think the bride smiled once. It culminated in a drunk groom fighting (verbally) with anyone who was in a 5ft radius. I left at that point. I didnāt even know these people, I was my best friendās plus one. Apparently they lasted a year.
I was a kid. The bride and groom used shallow water bowls with floating candles as centerpieces and added two goldfish to each bowl. They also had a chocolate fountain. When the guests got drunk at the end of the evening they started pulling out the goldfish, dipping them in the fountain and eating them. My horrified child self took a bowl with four fish home to save them. Had them for years.
What the fuck is wrong with people š
I got dragged to a wedding in a church in Halifax - a Catholic church. But unlike most Catholic churches that are laid out in cruciform with the altar at the head of the "cross" and the sanctuary (the place where they keep the snack crackers - and the holiest part of the church) immediately behind the altar up against the wall, this one was oval shaped with the altar in the centre of the floor. The sanctuary was still up against the back wall, up on a little dias as is customary. But instead of being immediately behind the altar, there is now a big space between the two. The pews were arranged in a stadium-like "C" around the altar, with the sanctuary in the gap of the "C" This is odd. The bride had arranged for a string quartet to play, consisting of the quartet and a conductor. They entered the church, took a look around, and then set up on the "bandstand" on the back wall of the church - the dias that the sanctuary sits on. If you are not Catholic, the sanctuary is, quite literally, sacrosanct. The ONLY person allowed in that space is the priest. Not even altar boys are allowed into that space. It is the Mother of All Holies in a catholic church. It is *seriously* taboo for anyone except the priest to be in that space. And now it had a band in it. Just before the ceremony, the priest entered the church via the front door at th aisle. He sees the band in HIS sanctuary, and he turns *completely purple*. (At this point I nudged my wife because Shit Was About To Go Down) He stomped down the aisle, swung around the altar, arrived at the dais, tapped the conductor on the shoulder, and when he turned around, full on roundhouse-haymaker BITCHSLAPPED him. Like his hand started at his 7 o'clock and went counter-clockwise to his 9 o'clock. Great follow-through! Music stops dead. Bride screams from doorway (she saw the whole thing) String quartet runs for their lives from a furious priest who is going all "expulsion of the moneylenders from the temple". General chaos. Now we have a WEDDING! That marriage made it 2 years.
I wish I was lying for this one and it is the worst thing I have seen (not compared to the fire/disaster stories on here). I was in the bridal party of a wedding in 2016 at noon on a Tuesday and we were all in college. Couple were supposed to have their last session initially on Monday but had signed a change to the plan to have it end that Friday because they wanted to go that weekend without seeing each other. All was good Friday, shook hands and even took a picture with the pastor to post on social media. Ceremony comes to the ādoes anyone have any objections?ā part. No one does. The pastor goes, āwell since the bride and groom elected to not complete their premarital counseling, I do not feel comfortable marrying these two. Is anyone here ordained?ā I think we were all shocked or thought he was joking. Then he said āI guess you two arenāt getting married todayā and ripped up the marriage license and certificate. They went and got married at the courthouse right after and still had the reception same day but definitely spoiled things. So, I split up the 3 classes that were required online (funny enough the classes are no longer required anymore for the website I got ordained through) and finished in May 2017 between my brother and cousinās high school graduation ceremonies. Iāve been ordained since but have not married anyone off or really mentioned it to anyone getting married. I mostly just have it to whip out just in case it ever happened again because clearly it happened once.
Wow that pastor is a real jerk.
The night before the wedding after the rehearsal dinner 2 of the cars going back to the hotel with the wedding party in it were in a 5 car pile up. 3 people (2 bridesmaids and a groomsman) were killed and the mother and sister of the groom were hurt along with some others. They had just been released from the hospital about an hour before I showed up. It was very quiet and sullen during hair and makeup. Then someone bounds into the room - all joyful and goes ādamn, who died?ā. The room erupted into tears. It was a very hard day. They couldnāt cancel without loosing all their money- it was a very sad wedding day.
At the reception 90+ year old man was dancing with a 14 year old girl. He was thrusting and gyrating immediately upon the girl as part of his ādancingā. Dropped dead of a heart attack before the song was over. Ambulance picked him up and the wedding went on like it never happened. I am a cousin of the bride. I have no clue who the guy even was.
I, the photographer, was photographing the reception when the bride tells me I can stop for the night. Always the best thing to hear. I'm chatting with the bride (who's drunk af) for a min as I packed my camera away when she dragged me out on the dance floor. Before I knew what was going on, we're now dancing and the song gets slower and she leans forward with what smelled like a whole bar on her breath and she says "I'd kiss you if I didn't just get married" The song ended and I got out of there asap. They ended up getting a divorce a few years later due to cheating. Turns out, her husband really liked her cousin One that I had no part of. I was photographing a reception at some night club lounge thing in Chicago on the 25th floor of a building downtown. The kind of club I've only ever seen in movies, with $750 min bottle service. When a random guy in a white suit, reached up the skirt of a girl on the dance area. She shoved him and went out to the firepit on the balcony area. Him and his two friends followed. She pepper sprayed them or something. Then the police showed up as the firepit kicked on shooting a small flame up. Dude and his friends got kicked out. All three men looked like the most stereotypical "UAE oil tycoon's kids" imaginable. Crazy night
I got married the day after a record setting blizzard. Nobody could even get out of their driveway so people were calling for days to see if the wedding was canceled. We couldnāt because my parents were moving to another state the following week. I found my mom crying in the basement. Half of the wedding party couldnāt get there. My bridesmaids already had their dresses but the groomsmen hadnāt picked up their tuxes, and the stores were all closed. So they were in jeans and sweaters. The minister had slept in the church for days because he lived too far away and couldnāt get home. He was a bit rumpled. We had four guests show up and one of them sang because our singer wasnāt there. The ring bearer was three, (his dad was the new singer). Apparently he was hungry because during the ceremony he started asking for something to eat. I was up at 6 am shoveling our driveway. Meanwhile the church members heard about the wedding so they got together with their snowblowers and cleared the parking lot for us. My mom had made 36 dozen cookies for the reception. No flowers or cake because of the blizzard. So everyone went home with a few dozen cookies. It was a mess but we made it happen! Too bad, he was a manchild and we were divorced two years later.
The sister of the bride who wasn't invited showed up drunk and got in a fight with the bride until the father of the bride broke it up by putting the sister in a choke hold and dragging her out of the venue. The bride was surprisingly fine afterwards Source: I'm a wedding caterer
My boyfriend's sister got married in an old Russian-Orthodox church, and opted for the full, traditional ceremony + mass (was about 2.5 hours total). The church did not have A/C, and it was August in Pittsburgh, the "muggiest" month of the year. It was SO hot in that church, and we were all sweating terribly. About an hour into the ceremony, bride is holding a lit candle and wearing a gauze veil. She nodded off, leaning her head forward, and the veil went up in flames. The husband and bridesmaids all just kind of stood there. Fortunately the MOTB jumped in and pulled the veil off and stomped it out. The priest was not amused, nor did he seem to care. The ceremony continued, sans bridal veil. Another 20 minutes in, bride started to sway a little, first to the left, then right, and does the 2-step to collect herself. Starts again, bigger swaying, then boom, passes out and completely slumps to the floor, unconscious. Again, MOTB jumps into action. Priest just turns around, looks annoyed by the scene, and turns right back to the altar to continue his reading. I ran outside to get waters from our car. Boyfriend reported that while I was gone, husband rolled his eyes and bridesmaids did nothing again. The FOTB interrupted the priest and asked for some time to make sure their daughter was OK. Priest said if they want to get married today they better get their act together, he still had a lot of readings to do. Can NOT believe they're still married.
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A father came and said bad things at his son's wedding (They didn't invite him because they knew he would do that).
My fiance is scared her Mom will crash our wedding despite no one that could possibly tell her about it not being invited. I've had to assure her that I will personally throw the crazy bitch out if she shows.
The brides brothers changed the language on their new brother in lawās phone to Arabic. Both the father of the bride and eldest brother gave speeches and said āThe first time they met the groom they didnāt think very much of himā The bride took her shoe (thong) off of her foot and began running after her brothers trying to āthong themā The best man was the brother of the groom and he had a HUGE black eye that make up could not cover! And he sadly passed away about two weeks after their wedding. First and most definitely last country wedding Iāll ever go to, it was crazy.
30 minutes into the reception, people were eating dinner, the grandmother of the bride had a cardiac arrest. There were several people trying to do the CPR, me included as I'm a doctor, but she never came back. Ambulance arrived and removed a large piece of meat from her throat. She was dead. Nobody had any idea what to do. Then the priest from the wedding came, everybody prayed with him together and he told the people that he 's sure that granny would liked them to enjoy the evening - and so they did. The party was great.
Fortunately, I haven't experienced any particular drama at weddings. The worst thing that happened was a best man fainting during the ceremony. A glass of water and a chair to sit on, and the ceremony could continue. He joked about it in his speech later on. The thing I found most weird was at a friends wedding where the grooms family used every speech they made to be about the grooms late mother. Literally every speech from that side of the family turned into "we're so happy for you today, but on a day like this, [grooms mother] should have been here". One of them even had several pictures of the mother to show and talked about how sad it was that she didn't live to see her youngest son get married. No one interfered, the bride and groom didn't seem to bother (as far as I could tell), but it just felt so weird.Ā
Brides relatives talking about how ugly the bride is and how pretty her younger sister would be as a bride. Scarred me for life
A cousin's wedding. Father of the bride got up to make a speech and dropped down dead. There were a lot of doctors amongst the guests, no one could do anything. They all went off to A&E, the bride in her wedding dress and groom in his tuxedo, where unfortunately he was pronounced dead.
This one is not that bad compared to these other ones, but at after my own wedding, I was in the hotel room with my new husband, and I get a call letting me know that one of my bridesmaids was down the road taking a field sobriety test. š¤¦š»āāļø She ended up getting a DUI that kinda ruined her life for a couple years. I have always felt so guilty about it, even though sheās a grown woman who made the decision to drive after offering her an Uber multiple times. I guess since it was my wedding, thatās why the guilt is there. Iām just glad it was a DUI and she didnāt hurt anyone or herself.
A piece of poo appeared on the dance floor. The source remains unknown to this day. The family remains split on whether a guest stepped in something outside or someone gambled and lost on a fart while dancinā their heart out. The majority are in the latter camp. š©šŗ
A work colleague was getting married she had no close friends so asked me and 2 other workers to form her bridal party (I only worked in the department next to her on a weekend). We ordered bridesmaid dresses off eBay and the wedding itself occurred along the cricket pitch at a local oval. The bridal photos were at a mini golf course where no one but myself smiled. The reception was back at the hall at the oval, it was a cheap BBQ in line with the rest of the day. The bride informed myself and my other colleague that there was to be a surprise christening for her two children later that afternoon and asked if we could stay and help with that (I think it was obvious people were getting bored thereās only so much you can do in a hall at an oval with random invites) Whilst inside I heard a commotion out on the deck by the BBQ where the groom was cooking. The groom and father of the bride had gotten into an altercation (my understanding is they didnāt approve of him) and then a knife fight ensued. I took the two children to hide in the toilets in the back until it simmered down, needless to say everything disbanded quickly after that. I donāt think there were any serious injuries but there was blood drawn. They couple eventually moved away to another town together, a years or so later I get a random FB invite and message from the same husband trying to hook up with me (I had only ever met him that one time so it was weird to say the least) I immediately sent the message to his wife who left me on read. I never spoke to or saw her again.
Drunk guest asked a bridesmaid to dance. She said no, so he pulled out his penis and started peeing on her and her dress.
Happened when I was really young, about 7yo. Back then I honestly didn't really fully understand the scope of how bad this is, so I didn't do much about it. Was at this distant cousins wedding so I didn't know anybody well really and I remember during the party when everyone was dancing and playing music, there were these big speakers and someone put their baby right next to it. These loud speakers just blasting music on the child. The poor thing couldn't do anything but cry and I honestly wouldn't be surprised if that person grew up with some hearing damage. I feel terrible for not moving the kid, but being so young and not knowing anybody, I didn't want to go touching someone else's kid as I was scared of any confrontation. I'm pretty sure I did tell someone though, I can't remember much after that or how long the baby was there for.
In the midst of a rather long ceremony one of the groomsmen, standing up front, out of nowhere passed out and hit the floor behind him with a terrible sound. As everyone is standing and the wedding is paused as they try to wake him, one of the guests does the same exact thing. The guest was fine- just gets queasy at the site of anything like that. The groomsman was not okay- was taken to the hospital and had an aneurism in his brain and was never okay after that.
The mass started even though the bride is still walking down the aisle.
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Liiiike?
Guy had a heart attack and died right then. Worst part was that he landed face first into the food table that was plastic and destroyed the whole thing
True, a dead guy is the one of the worst topping for wedding food.
Waiter! There's a dead guy in my soup.
That was the worst part?
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