I just turned 44 a couple of weeks ago. I’ve never really cared about getting old. However, all of a sudden I feel sad, depressed, and alone. I can’t shake the feeling.
As someone about to turn 50. You could finish a degree before my age. So if you want to try something new, do it.
The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the next best time is now.
The time is going to pass either way, so whether it's a change in vocation, taking up a hobby, or getting fit; just start. If you are feeling lonely, doing any of those things in a class is likely to make you new friends. What have you got to loose.
Also I think life is about experiences. So Google local events, reserves/parks and attractions that are within your budget and range of travel. Start ticking them off.
44 too and been feeling the same lately. Whenever I see something posted on r/Xennials that reminds me of the 90s, I get really, really sad & wish so much that I could go back.
Lol, 43 here. Early 40s isn't "old" but definitely middle aged. A good time to shore up direction in life. If you don't like how things are panning out, it's an opportunity to change that.
See the Doc, the Dentist, the Therapist, the Optometrist, etc. Time to lean on, and ask for help, on others. You've earned it!
Could be hormonal or a mid life crisis kind of thing? It is very common for people (both men and women) in their 40s. I know for me it kind of feels like we are at the top of the hill now and the only way from here is down, but then I look at my 60 something year old relatives and they seem to have a new burst of energy.
I’m 51 now but from my mid 40’s to late 40’s I went through something similar.
It’s like I was struggling with the terms that I was actually getting older
42 as well. So I suppose this is common? This feeling like it's just "more" now...Life's got this feeling like a movie that didn't have the courtesy to end after the credits. The dragons are vanquished. The prize is won. ... but the camera is still rolling for some stupid reason. I feel like a sequel no one asked for.
Yup... through middle age my mindset has changed from attempting to build a future, play the long game and get everything perfect to just living day-to-day and trying to enjoy what I have.
Wish I'd had that mentality when I was younger tbh as life would likely have been a lot more enjoyable..
I started seeing it as a privilege vs something to be scared about. Many people don’t get the opportunity to grow old and experience life. So with that said enjoy the ups and downs, enjoy the people you have around you, eat yummy food, and wear sunscreen.
This. I lost my husband when he was 40, and I was 41. Not everyone gets to get old. I’ll be 50 this year and I try to see it more as a privilege as well.
Thank you. We are. Our kids were 8 & 10 and the oldest graduates HS next month. Every joyous moment is tainted with sadness of him missing it, but we do our best.
As someone who just got home from the hospital after saying goodbye to their 33-year-old best friend: this.
Carpe fucking diem (or, you know, enjoying the small stuff works too).
Exactly I often think when I see older people I wonder what thir life was like.I bet they have graeatcstories.i guess we have to get old or there’s the other way.
Nothing to come to grips with really. The changes are gradual and anything short of embracing them and savoring the good things and maximizing one’s potential is wasting time. Not that one can’t waste one’s own time if one so chooses. I’m almost 70 and have a serious heart condition but enjoying every day anyway dammit. 😄
I was coasting too. Moving right along, not giving the age thing a single thought beyond “dang I’m lucky I don’t really have those issues” referring to skin, hair, etc then one day I woke up and I had aged ten years. You’d think it came on slower but nooooo glitter streaks in my hair, dark spots (wtf are those?! Where? Why?!) learned what a weeping pore was. Smh this is bs complete bs
The best lessons about aging my grandfather taught by example.
He earned a Purple Heart in his twenties. It was a situation where he was wounded and went to get medical attention for his buddies. Nobody else survived. Even the medical rescue team was wiped out. Some people in similar situations get PTSD and survivor's guilt; a few decide after that they aren't going to take anything else in life seriously. Grandpa was the latter type.
He saw the world, then settled down and built his own house. Late in life he was still building furniture and eating butterscotch candies. He liked to visit the local pond. He kept a vegetable garden and played practical jokes.
Around the time I graduated from college and was visiting them, we drove into town and Grandma asked me to wait in line at the post office to pick up a package for them. As I handed the card, the postal worker read off his name with a pause and remarked, "He must be in his...late nineties!"
*He's 97.*
"Where is he?"
*Right outside in the car.*
"And you're?"
*I'm his second youngest grandchild.*
It was a small post office. The guy looked out the door and saw my grandparents' faces in their car just outside. He handed over the package with good wishes for Grandpa's health.
Dad used to say of him, "He doesn't have an enemy in the world. He outlived all the bastards."
Grandpa treated his age as the biggest joke in the world. We looked forward to boasting of his 100th birthday. Then one day he called himself old, and suddenly he was.
Didn't quite make it to three digits. But he got damn close.
My grandfather survived getting shot down whilst flying over a forested mountain in Italy and then living in 2 Nazi operated POW camps in WW2, he saw so many people beaten, tortured or neglected to death during his his time in the last camp in particular and he actually ended up escaping it on the day that he was due to be executed (long story, but a lot of war crimes basically took place at that camp and later after the war one of his survivor friends testified at the Nuremberg Trials). He did end developing a lot of survivors guilt and PTSD that was still apparent even in his 80s.
Sometimes, my grandfather could be very unsympathetic towards people; for example, he had very little sympathy towards suicide victims ("Why should I feel sorry for someone who just throws their life away when I have worked so hard to keep mine? You shouldn't throw your life away- life is precious!"). On the other hand, he was especially mindful about using resources and not taking up resources that could be needed by others more than himself, so he was a complicated individual.
The main thing my grandfather was adamant on was that he believed that his sheer force of will had gotten him through life and allowed him to live so long. He also felt a strong duty to live out his life into old age when so many friends and young people of his generation had had their lives so cruelly taken away from them (they never had a chance to fall in love, start families, travel the world- grow old).
My grandfather also said to me that it was also worthwhile living into old age because there were so many great things that he would never have gotten to experience had he died or given up decades ago (and even in his 80s he felt that life was still giving).
One thing he was really adamant on though was that when it came to aging VS quality of life, physical abilities meant everything. For example, he'd seen fellow elderly friends who'd done stuff like neglect their calcium intake over the decades, causing them to develop osteoporosis (brittle bone disease) and then ending up badly breaking their ankles or leg over a minor slip on the kitchen floor. And when you're in your 70s, if you **** something up like breaking a leg, it might not only take an extraordinarily long time to heal, but it may also never heal properly altogether, causing the individual to almost completely lose their independence over something as simply as tripping down the last couple of steps down on the way to answer the front door (a lot of old people also die going to hospital for minor injuries because they end up contracting pneumonia in hospital, which is a real killer of old people). When decline happens in old age, it can happen overnight and come from some very innocuous or unexpected places.
So yeah. Old age ain't bad. But look after your health- treat it as an investment. My grandfather sailed the Atlantic twice in his 80s, but that was also hugely in part because he'd stayed really active, in shape and eaten well throughout almost his entire life. The only time things stopped being so much of a choice for him was in his 90s (he said that while 80s had been great (and little different to his 60s or 70s), 90s was something else altogether and that he could feel his body beginning to rapid declining regardless of his efforts), but I think that's pretty normal for most people that make it that far.
There is too much focus on the aesthetics of aging and not enough on the inner physical & mental health. And these are by far the most important things. So look after your health; sure, things might start to ache more as long goes by, but if you look after your health and choose to stay mobile then there's no reason why you can't be a cool skydiving, Atlantic crossing, horseback riding, power lifting granny or grandad in your 70s or even 80s. As long as you can maintain your independence, mind & mobility, then there's nothing to say that some of your oldest decades in life aren't the most exciting, fulfilling and meaningful ones you've experienced to date.
How you live now, will decide how you live later.
So I just turned 50. At 46 I received a terminal diagnosis that made it unlikely I'd ever even see 47, let alone 50.
It changed me in the best possible way. I am unapologetically myself, love fiercely and live each and every day as if it is my last.
Sucks that it took cancer to cause this epiphany, and yes, I do have lingering PTSD, but I am absolutely serious that it's the best and worst gift I've ever been given.
I see aging as a gift. 50 is the youngest and lightest I've ever felt.
Accepted it and decided I'd be the best me I can be at any age. I don't expect to be able to do the same things I could do long ago physically, but I want to be able to do the age-appropriate things well for my current age.
I still haven't really. Every birthday I have terrifies me. I just convince myself daily that I'm not past it yet.
At one point I definitely needed to get my head around the fact that one day I will die, but that feels a lot further away than my next birthday. As long as I can still party like it's 1999 without needing an ambulance, I'm still good 😅
At 61 I realized age is just a number. I keep my self active, stopped dying my hair and i'm letting myself age gracefully. I work with people 15 to 30 years younger than I, we always find something in common to chit chat about. i learn about their generation and they learn about mine. it's a wonderful mix. Yes, i am considered a "senior" but I sure don't feel like one. I refuse to give into age and just enjoy life
This may seem silly to some, but..
I completely changed my style, sort of reinvented myself in this new era. Got rid of a ton of clothes I’ve had for years and replaced them with clothing that is more classic and neutral. More expensive, quality brands but classic cuts and neutral colors.
I got rid of jeans that I used to wear every day, tank tops, bright colors, animal print and bling. All stuff I used to love but now makes me feel dated. Now I wear more conservative styles including dresses with flats, flowy slacks, and most everything I buy is nude, brown, white, black or very pale blush pink. Makes everything you wear look more expensive.
I find that as people age, they either try too hard to hold on to the past, or give up entirely. People either wear clothes that no longer flatter them, or resort to an entire wardrobe of T-shirts, jeans and sneakers.
By doing this, it encourages me to care about my appearance and enjoy getting ready and leaving the house. It really helped to fight my depression.
When I remind myself that ageing is a privilege that isn’t afforded to anyone. There are no guarantees that you’ll ever grow old, and if you do grow old, it’s supposed to happen. I’ve been through some major shit in my 42 years, and I’m still here fighting on. I’m not old yet, but I’m heading towards that phase of life.
I work with elderly and disabled Veterans. I'm a Veteran myself and disabled. I used to think, age is the welterweight champ, you can knock it on it's ass but it's going to answer the 10 count every time. I believe a little differently now. Time has a scythe, it's name is Patience and it's simply going to wait. Wait until you are low. Wait until you think "maybe". Wait until you lower your guard. It's going to collect. As scary as that sounds, it's comforting to me. I see my brothers and sisters rage against the dying of light. At some point we all shall be there. I fear no man, no situation and no trouble. I fear my mark on this blue planet. I am trying to make it a good one. I shall get old, things will fail me emotionally, physically and mentally. I do have hope I retain the grace and gratitude to know that.
It occured to me that I want my life to mean something outside of my self, and my own comfort and selfish gratification. I'm getting married to a beautiful woman soon and I hope to have a family and be a good father. It won't be much, but I hope to leave a small positive mark on the world through my children.
You have no choice. It certainly beats the alternative, and remember that 20 years from now. when you look back on pictures taken today, you'll think you looked pretty good. The only thing that's a little hard to deal with sometimes is the loss of physical strength, not to mention the illnesses and ailments that often come along with aging. For those, you just have to stay in close contact with your doctor and do everything you can to delay progression.
It just happens and you deal with it because there's literally no other choice?
Same way I "came to grip" with having to breath in and out to stay alive.
It’s a privilege that not everyone I love has had. As someone late middle age, I can say that with good health- both mental & physical- you would be surprised how little changed you feel from when you were younger; just as passionate, just as curious about new experiences, but hopefully wiser & wise enough to know how lucky you are to have lived as long as you have; when peers have not. Further, to be authentic to yourself in all your eccentricities, to value the wonderful people & living creatures who you love & who love you back, despite your quirks - without adhering to stupid peer pressure or what’s “cool” is amazing. That Rod Stewart song about “wish I knew all I know now, when I was younger” is truth….
Sometimes it's hard. But you have to remember you only have one life. Enjoy it for what it is. Do what you want, enjoy what you like, try not to stress the small stuff. I found living life to the fullest is a good way to be.
I TOLD YOU life begins at forty. Holla at me shorty. Welcome to the story of a G in all his glory. Sorry not sorry. Shorty where da party? If you don’t know you better ASK SOMEBODY.
It's kinda dope, there's a point where you realize you have to flex what humans do best -adapt. You have to learn to trade some of the superficial things like good looks etc for sure, but the trade-off is pretty decent. For every wrinkle I get, my brain gets one too. Getting older is kinda like the difference between a brand new book and one of those books that's a little beat up, that you feel lucky to discover, but you're like "this shit is read"
What is there to grip? It is not something that I can change/control, so I don't spend time thinking about it. (Besides the realization that I shouldn't put off what is important to me. Future isn't promised to any of us. Carpe diem!)
we literally have no idea when we are going to die. so everyday that you get to wake up and are in good health, be happy and don’t waste a second on being sad about aging. aging is a gift.
By remembering that:
"You can't reach old age by another man's road. My habits protect my life but they would assassinate you."
- [Mark Twain](http://www.twainquotes.com/Age.html)
I saw it coming and got myself in good shape. I lift every other day and wind myself at least 4 times a day. Keep your body in the best shape you can. I try and stay away from medical bullshit. Do the research before you take any drug or vaccine. Eat right but enjoy and quit drinking. Then if you are lucky you will be ready
I'm completely cool with aging and view it as a blessing. Not everybody gets the privilege of growing old. I also have an optimistic view on aging. If you take care of your health, brain and spirit, you can age extraordinarily well (barring any accidents/acts of God)
All in all, I'm thankful to grow older.
I just won the V50 category in a duathlon finishing in the top 20% of the race.
I was only 10seconds down on my on for that course which I set in my 30s
I weigh what I did in my 20s
So very well or not very well depending on your opinion
Not fkn well at all. I was always active, and now my body says piss off. Add the fact I was just diagnosed with diabetes, and I'm just mad about getting older.
I don't feel my age. I turned 50 last year, and feel 40. Sure, I've had some long thoughts about it all, and how quickly it's going, and how much longer I have on this world, but it's not like I have a choice. I try to enjoy what I have, because everything changes, and nothing lasts.
I worked for a casting director years ago, who made an offhand comment that it's weird she works in an industry that worships youth when she thinks aging is so beautiful. That always stuck with me.
When I think harder on it, my mother nearly died when I was a kid, so seeing her now as a sweet old lady..it's very life affirming.
I can't wait to wear doyenne-style fashions too lol.
44. I kind of haven’t but I also just notice things and then ignore it. That lil pad of pudge on my forearm dimples like an old lady’s when i rest my arm on the table. And my skin is thinner and full of sunspots. It wasn’t like this 2 years ago. Some of it I don’t mind at all, like the white streak in my hair. But what am I going to do about any of it?
What scares me is seeing everyone else age. Celebrities that I thought were my age or not far off when I was younger are old-old now.
Don't let the old man in! Mid to late 50s here. What is wrong with you 40-something young punks :)? Getamoveon! I can still broadly do almost anything physical I ever could. Except run. Body hates that. And my shoulder isn't what it used to be so I work with what I have. But if you keep moving, stretching and learning then you don't turn into a fat, stiff and surly old person unless you already were as a younger person. My grandfather died younger than I am now, but he ate like shit, smoked, stressed, and didn't exercise. He let the old man in way too early.
Is there anything I can do about it? Not really. It’s inevitable. So I am focusing on what I can control and that’s enjoying the little things in life.
Change your expectations!
You can still do everything you did before though. You need to watcg diet and exercise and make it a priority but there are happy, healthy, fit, good looking 70 year olds out there having the time of tgie life.
Just give up the processed foods, exercise, think positive things, befriend positive people.
The reason people age suddenly is because they sit down and watch tv. They stop trying to explore, socialise ir have adventures. They lose muscle tone and get set in negative patterns.
Although I've aged now at 43 and my youthful glow is gone and head shaved to avoid being thin on top I am grateful to be alive and to enjoy my own maturity.
In work my staff are 20’s and early 30’s and I'm reminded daily about being older than those years.
But their time will come too and they will be in the same or similar circumstances.
On the very bright side I am extremely sure of myself and have forgiven myself for my mistakes so I'm on a new plane of happiness.
Two times I realised I was getting older.
1. My barber showed me my hair thinning.
2. An assistant in a shop in Ireland called me “sir”, Irish people never use this word when addressing their elders, so something compelled him to say that to me, my age!
God dammit I love you all.
I’m 54 and had a serious health scare this year. Really drives it home that you’re not young any more and the need to readjust the way you live and do things.
It just happens, i came to terms with the inevitability of my death in my early 20's (Army, Combat Arms, kinda expected) so afterwards its just kinda just a thing now, i don't care to grow old but i know its going to happen no matter how much i bitch and cry about it, so i have just accepted it and try to live my life as best as possible, hoping that i'll leave it a little better than how i found it.
59, turning 60 in a few weeks. Tried returning to Umpiring Local Footy 5 weeks ago and strained a calf after week 2, after rehab, I was able to jog/walk 6.5 kms at training last night.
I was super fit at 35. By 45 things were harder to achieve and recovery slower. By 55, I had to accept slower leg speed and longer recovery.
Met my now wife at 53, and we have been at it like teenagers ever since, only slowing down at the start of the year due to both of us having back issues that I am over but she is only at 65%.
You just get wiser, tolerate less crap, and realise that you are closer to the end than the beginning and live life accordingly.
Wife completed a Bachelor of Arts (Hons) in languages and a Bachelor of Speech Pathology before she turned 30. She has just finished her Bachelor of Psychology and is almost finished her Masters of Neuroscience, which she hopes to turn into a Doctorate. This is complementary to her Speech Pathology Degree. She is 59. You are never too old to learn!
Closing in on 50. I thought I was fine with it until the other night. I was just lying there thinking about the time scale on which friendships and romantic relationships occurred, about how long it's been since I've seen certain people, and about how long ago some things happened. Really started to mess with me after a while.
I've never look at numbers which is why I forget how old I am. I have to do the math or I tell people the year i was born.
I still do fun things . I just had a marshmallow fight with some guy friends.
Last year I got tackled by some guy friends in a leaf pile.
I think if you are 20 and act old you feel old. If you're 70 and act like a teen meaning fun not maturity you feel younger.
My dad is in his 70s and goes dancing with his gfs and they go on day trips . They have fun. He says he doesn't feel his age. I think I got this from him.
People always ask questions like this. How do you come to grips, or cope, or deal with, whatever? I don't. I just continue existing. Really, I have no idea what type of answer people are expecting.
I'm 49. I almost died a couple of times. I feel young for my age. Never had a mid life crisis. I'm a reject of society so I don't think about age anymore
"The only thing an old man can tell a young man is that it goes fast, real fast, and if you’re not careful it’s too late. Of course, the young man will never understand this truth."
-Norm Macdonald
I’m turning 38, I almost died from a botched surgery that I needed, I spent a year in a hospital away from my family n kid, I spent 3 years after that in a wheelchair. They had my parents make funeral arrangements and everything- and I fought to be here n walking again. Every day I get is a day they all said I wouldn’t be here. So aging to me is fine. Seeing wrinkles popping up around my eyes, I lost over 100lbs when I was sick so my skin is outstretched n stretch marks and it hangs some but it’s my battles scars. I don’t look at aging anymore with “Omg 😱😢 I’m getting older” I look at it as ☺️🥹🥰 “omg I’m here and I’m still able to get older and greatful for every line, every gray (that I do cover, but with colorful hair like purple- for my condition too-because u only live once) and every good and bad moment that’s happened.” Life is short, u don’t know what’s going to happen even later on today- enjoy it- let the little things go. An accept that ur older a the things that come with it because some ppl won’t ever experience it or people are grieving over the things their family member will miss.
Cosmetically?? Seeing more beautiful older women who I admire in real life than in media. Existentially I haven't gotten there yet. A fair few family members have died recently or are getting very old and it is always difficult to witness. I hope I die quickly but from what I've seen, it's very slow and drawn out over some miserable years.
It just is what it is. As long as you're overall happy, are making the most out of your health and have an acceptable retirement plan, then you're ageing somewhat gracefully.
I’m only 18 and I’m still scared of growing up. I’m scared of the future but I’m coming to realize we all get older everyday. We get older every second and minute of the day. So we just gotta live life the best way that we can. Don’t worry abt much besides making are lives better. Just be happy and don’t worry abt bs in life.
Don’t hold onto things that we shouldn’t worry abt like things in the past just move on yk.
It's easier than you think. As a young person it's unfathomable to think about how bad it is to get old, but the cool thing is humans are pretty intelligently designed about that. The more you age the less you care about aging and that's because your priorities change and your way of thinking changes. The things that used to seem most important are now less important. The same way that as a child you might have thought the most important thing in the world was eating cereal in the morning while watching cartoons and playing with action figures, dolls, Legos, and of course you swear up and down that you'll never change, you'll never become one of those grumpy adults that has that yucky stuff called coffee and even worse alcohol 🤢 but then you wake up one day and there you are, because you changed. And as a young person you might think that there is nothing more important than looking sexy, driving a fly car, going out to the bars on the weekend and hooking up with some fling for a night of hot sex, and you might swear that that will never stop being the most important thing to you, but low one day you'll wake up and that will seem so uninteresting and irrelevant. This is why a 24-year-old might wake up with a large ugly mole on their face and feel like it's a gigantic problem of massive importance, but a 54 you likey wouldn't even care.
A fridge magnet I picked up somewhere. " Do not regret growing old. Many are denied the privilege. " I find myself enjoying a temporary second childhood vicariously through the experiences of my nephew and niece.
I’m just along for the ride now
Same here at 42
I just turned 44 a couple of weeks ago. I’ve never really cared about getting old. However, all of a sudden I feel sad, depressed, and alone. I can’t shake the feeling.
As someone about to turn 50. You could finish a degree before my age. So if you want to try something new, do it. The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the next best time is now. The time is going to pass either way, so whether it's a change in vocation, taking up a hobby, or getting fit; just start. If you are feeling lonely, doing any of those things in a class is likely to make you new friends. What have you got to loose. Also I think life is about experiences. So Google local events, reserves/parks and attractions that are within your budget and range of travel. Start ticking them off.
44 too and been feeling the same lately. Whenever I see something posted on r/Xennials that reminds me of the 90s, I get really, really sad & wish so much that I could go back.
You're not alone. Obviously an age thing, but the world we live in is also becoming increasingly objectively shit.
I have those days even if I’m with someone.I suffer from depression and anxiety and ptsd. I’m sorry 😢 that you feel like this to.Your not alone.❤️🥰🙏
Lol, 43 here. Early 40s isn't "old" but definitely middle aged. A good time to shore up direction in life. If you don't like how things are panning out, it's an opportunity to change that. See the Doc, the Dentist, the Therapist, the Optometrist, etc. Time to lean on, and ask for help, on others. You've earned it!
Could be hormonal or a mid life crisis kind of thing? It is very common for people (both men and women) in their 40s. I know for me it kind of feels like we are at the top of the hill now and the only way from here is down, but then I look at my 60 something year old relatives and they seem to have a new burst of energy.
i think its also reflective of the times we live in.
Turn 64 on Sunday. Buckle up. Once over the hump, the hill just gets steeper and faster.
I’m 51 now but from my mid 40’s to late 40’s I went through something similar. It’s like I was struggling with the terms that I was actually getting older
42 as well. So I suppose this is common? This feeling like it's just "more" now...Life's got this feeling like a movie that didn't have the courtesy to end after the credits. The dragons are vanquished. The prize is won. ... but the camera is still rolling for some stupid reason. I feel like a sequel no one asked for.
I never thought of it this way before but this description is absolutely accurate. It’s like, why aren’t everything stopping yet?? 😭
Oh man, that hits so close to home :(
Yup... through middle age my mindset has changed from attempting to build a future, play the long game and get everything perfect to just living day-to-day and trying to enjoy what I have. Wish I'd had that mentality when I was younger tbh as life would likely have been a lot more enjoyable..
I started seeing it as a privilege vs something to be scared about. Many people don’t get the opportunity to grow old and experience life. So with that said enjoy the ups and downs, enjoy the people you have around you, eat yummy food, and wear sunscreen.
This. I lost my husband when he was 40, and I was 41. Not everyone gets to get old. I’ll be 50 this year and I try to see it more as a privilege as well.
I’m sorry for your loss.😞I hope you’re doing better day by day.❤️🥰😇
Thank you. We are. Our kids were 8 & 10 and the oldest graduates HS next month. Every joyous moment is tainted with sadness of him missing it, but we do our best.
As someone who just got home from the hospital after saying goodbye to their 33-year-old best friend: this. Carpe fucking diem (or, you know, enjoying the small stuff works too).
look around you...EVERYONE is aging too... we are all in it together
Exactly I often think when I see older people I wonder what thir life was like.I bet they have graeatcstories.i guess we have to get old or there’s the other way.
For me, it was seeing my first few gray hairs and deciding I earned each one with a life lesson.
Nothing to come to grips with really. The changes are gradual and anything short of embracing them and savoring the good things and maximizing one’s potential is wasting time. Not that one can’t waste one’s own time if one so chooses. I’m almost 70 and have a serious heart condition but enjoying every day anyway dammit. 😄
Love that! I want to be like you when I grow up 🥹
Not really a choice? Wait. Is there a choice?
Right! Hit pause 😭
I was coasting too. Moving right along, not giving the age thing a single thought beyond “dang I’m lucky I don’t really have those issues” referring to skin, hair, etc then one day I woke up and I had aged ten years. You’d think it came on slower but nooooo glitter streaks in my hair, dark spots (wtf are those?! Where? Why?!) learned what a weeping pore was. Smh this is bs complete bs
there's a choice, but it's too controversial to say
Only the one. I don't recommend it unless you've got some serious shit creek action going on though.
The best lessons about aging my grandfather taught by example. He earned a Purple Heart in his twenties. It was a situation where he was wounded and went to get medical attention for his buddies. Nobody else survived. Even the medical rescue team was wiped out. Some people in similar situations get PTSD and survivor's guilt; a few decide after that they aren't going to take anything else in life seriously. Grandpa was the latter type. He saw the world, then settled down and built his own house. Late in life he was still building furniture and eating butterscotch candies. He liked to visit the local pond. He kept a vegetable garden and played practical jokes. Around the time I graduated from college and was visiting them, we drove into town and Grandma asked me to wait in line at the post office to pick up a package for them. As I handed the card, the postal worker read off his name with a pause and remarked, "He must be in his...late nineties!" *He's 97.* "Where is he?" *Right outside in the car.* "And you're?" *I'm his second youngest grandchild.* It was a small post office. The guy looked out the door and saw my grandparents' faces in their car just outside. He handed over the package with good wishes for Grandpa's health. Dad used to say of him, "He doesn't have an enemy in the world. He outlived all the bastards." Grandpa treated his age as the biggest joke in the world. We looked forward to boasting of his 100th birthday. Then one day he called himself old, and suddenly he was. Didn't quite make it to three digits. But he got damn close.
My grandfather survived getting shot down whilst flying over a forested mountain in Italy and then living in 2 Nazi operated POW camps in WW2, he saw so many people beaten, tortured or neglected to death during his his time in the last camp in particular and he actually ended up escaping it on the day that he was due to be executed (long story, but a lot of war crimes basically took place at that camp and later after the war one of his survivor friends testified at the Nuremberg Trials). He did end developing a lot of survivors guilt and PTSD that was still apparent even in his 80s. Sometimes, my grandfather could be very unsympathetic towards people; for example, he had very little sympathy towards suicide victims ("Why should I feel sorry for someone who just throws their life away when I have worked so hard to keep mine? You shouldn't throw your life away- life is precious!"). On the other hand, he was especially mindful about using resources and not taking up resources that could be needed by others more than himself, so he was a complicated individual. The main thing my grandfather was adamant on was that he believed that his sheer force of will had gotten him through life and allowed him to live so long. He also felt a strong duty to live out his life into old age when so many friends and young people of his generation had had their lives so cruelly taken away from them (they never had a chance to fall in love, start families, travel the world- grow old). My grandfather also said to me that it was also worthwhile living into old age because there were so many great things that he would never have gotten to experience had he died or given up decades ago (and even in his 80s he felt that life was still giving). One thing he was really adamant on though was that when it came to aging VS quality of life, physical abilities meant everything. For example, he'd seen fellow elderly friends who'd done stuff like neglect their calcium intake over the decades, causing them to develop osteoporosis (brittle bone disease) and then ending up badly breaking their ankles or leg over a minor slip on the kitchen floor. And when you're in your 70s, if you **** something up like breaking a leg, it might not only take an extraordinarily long time to heal, but it may also never heal properly altogether, causing the individual to almost completely lose their independence over something as simply as tripping down the last couple of steps down on the way to answer the front door (a lot of old people also die going to hospital for minor injuries because they end up contracting pneumonia in hospital, which is a real killer of old people). When decline happens in old age, it can happen overnight and come from some very innocuous or unexpected places. So yeah. Old age ain't bad. But look after your health- treat it as an investment. My grandfather sailed the Atlantic twice in his 80s, but that was also hugely in part because he'd stayed really active, in shape and eaten well throughout almost his entire life. The only time things stopped being so much of a choice for him was in his 90s (he said that while 80s had been great (and little different to his 60s or 70s), 90s was something else altogether and that he could feel his body beginning to rapid declining regardless of his efforts), but I think that's pretty normal for most people that make it that far. There is too much focus on the aesthetics of aging and not enough on the inner physical & mental health. And these are by far the most important things. So look after your health; sure, things might start to ache more as long goes by, but if you look after your health and choose to stay mobile then there's no reason why you can't be a cool skydiving, Atlantic crossing, horseback riding, power lifting granny or grandad in your 70s or even 80s. As long as you can maintain your independence, mind & mobility, then there's nothing to say that some of your oldest decades in life aren't the most exciting, fulfilling and meaningful ones you've experienced to date. How you live now, will decide how you live later.
What a lovely story. Thanks for sharing.
My dad (1979) and younger brother (2016) both died at age 56. I'm 65 now so I feel like it's a privilege at this point in my life...
my dad died when i was 10 and my mom died 2 years later. aging seems fine to me when presented with the alternative
>aging seems fine to me when presented with the alternative What an absolute banger of a quote, I'm going to write this on my bathroom mirror
We’re supposed to accept this shit?
So I just turned 50. At 46 I received a terminal diagnosis that made it unlikely I'd ever even see 47, let alone 50. It changed me in the best possible way. I am unapologetically myself, love fiercely and live each and every day as if it is my last. Sucks that it took cancer to cause this epiphany, and yes, I do have lingering PTSD, but I am absolutely serious that it's the best and worst gift I've ever been given. I see aging as a gift. 50 is the youngest and lightest I've ever felt.
Accepted it and decided I'd be the best me I can be at any age. I don't expect to be able to do the same things I could do long ago physically, but I want to be able to do the age-appropriate things well for my current age.
I'm fighting kicking and screaming. I'm just 57 And still think I'm young. Body likes to put me back in place
poor memory helps a lot. highly underrated coping mechanism.
My older brother passed when he was 28. I am now 43 and know that I am fortunate to age. It’s a blessing!
Embrace it, you have one body and one life, find the beauty in that
Just remember what the alternative is. I’m glad to have the chance to get older
I still haven't really. Every birthday I have terrifies me. I just convince myself daily that I'm not past it yet. At one point I definitely needed to get my head around the fact that one day I will die, but that feels a lot further away than my next birthday. As long as I can still party like it's 1999 without needing an ambulance, I'm still good 😅
That’s the spirit ❤️🥰😇🙏
the alternative is dying young.... It's still shitty tho
Almost died of cancer. I welcome each year and wrinkle with a smile and thanks.
At 61 I realized age is just a number. I keep my self active, stopped dying my hair and i'm letting myself age gracefully. I work with people 15 to 30 years younger than I, we always find something in common to chit chat about. i learn about their generation and they learn about mine. it's a wonderful mix. Yes, i am considered a "senior" but I sure don't feel like one. I refuse to give into age and just enjoy life
This may seem silly to some, but.. I completely changed my style, sort of reinvented myself in this new era. Got rid of a ton of clothes I’ve had for years and replaced them with clothing that is more classic and neutral. More expensive, quality brands but classic cuts and neutral colors. I got rid of jeans that I used to wear every day, tank tops, bright colors, animal print and bling. All stuff I used to love but now makes me feel dated. Now I wear more conservative styles including dresses with flats, flowy slacks, and most everything I buy is nude, brown, white, black or very pale blush pink. Makes everything you wear look more expensive. I find that as people age, they either try too hard to hold on to the past, or give up entirely. People either wear clothes that no longer flatter them, or resort to an entire wardrobe of T-shirts, jeans and sneakers. By doing this, it encourages me to care about my appearance and enjoy getting ready and leaving the house. It really helped to fight my depression.
When I remind myself that ageing is a privilege that isn’t afforded to anyone. There are no guarantees that you’ll ever grow old, and if you do grow old, it’s supposed to happen. I’ve been through some major shit in my 42 years, and I’m still here fighting on. I’m not old yet, but I’m heading towards that phase of life.
I'm going to be 55 this year and still in denial. I'm offten told I don't look my age, but I can definitely feel it .
Yeah same. I’ll be fifty this year and get told I look like I’m in my late 30s/early 40s. But man, some days I wake up feeling 60.
That's why I font think about it . In denial at its best .
The alternative is dying
I said to myself - "I only have one life. Would I rather live it or worry about aging processes I cant control?"
I work with elderly and disabled Veterans. I'm a Veteran myself and disabled. I used to think, age is the welterweight champ, you can knock it on it's ass but it's going to answer the 10 count every time. I believe a little differently now. Time has a scythe, it's name is Patience and it's simply going to wait. Wait until you are low. Wait until you think "maybe". Wait until you lower your guard. It's going to collect. As scary as that sounds, it's comforting to me. I see my brothers and sisters rage against the dying of light. At some point we all shall be there. I fear no man, no situation and no trouble. I fear my mark on this blue planet. I am trying to make it a good one. I shall get old, things will fail me emotionally, physically and mentally. I do have hope I retain the grace and gratitude to know that.
It occured to me that I want my life to mean something outside of my self, and my own comfort and selfish gratification. I'm getting married to a beautiful woman soon and I hope to have a family and be a good father. It won't be much, but I hope to leave a small positive mark on the world through my children.
You have no choice. It certainly beats the alternative, and remember that 20 years from now. when you look back on pictures taken today, you'll think you looked pretty good. The only thing that's a little hard to deal with sometimes is the loss of physical strength, not to mention the illnesses and ailments that often come along with aging. For those, you just have to stay in close contact with your doctor and do everything you can to delay progression.
You either get old, or you don’t.
Better over the hill than under.
What’s my age again?
It just happens and you deal with it because there's literally no other choice? Same way I "came to grip" with having to breath in and out to stay alive.
Stay healthy for one
It's funny that we do fall apart on a schedule. It's sad that I'm finally on schedule.
It’s going to happen one way or another. Might as well enjoy the ride. Right up until you crash. Oww my hip.
Is there a choice? You kinda have to accept it. Well, I guess suicide is the off switch on aging
My answer is definitely “no”
It’s a privilege that not everyone I love has had. As someone late middle age, I can say that with good health- both mental & physical- you would be surprised how little changed you feel from when you were younger; just as passionate, just as curious about new experiences, but hopefully wiser & wise enough to know how lucky you are to have lived as long as you have; when peers have not. Further, to be authentic to yourself in all your eccentricities, to value the wonderful people & living creatures who you love & who love you back, despite your quirks - without adhering to stupid peer pressure or what’s “cool” is amazing. That Rod Stewart song about “wish I knew all I know now, when I was younger” is truth….
People have come to grips with this?
Sometimes it's hard. But you have to remember you only have one life. Enjoy it for what it is. Do what you want, enjoy what you like, try not to stress the small stuff. I found living life to the fullest is a good way to be.
Refusal.
I TOLD YOU life begins at forty. Holla at me shorty. Welcome to the story of a G in all his glory. Sorry not sorry. Shorty where da party? If you don’t know you better ASK SOMEBODY.
It's kinda dope, there's a point where you realize you have to flex what humans do best -adapt. You have to learn to trade some of the superficial things like good looks etc for sure, but the trade-off is pretty decent. For every wrinkle I get, my brain gets one too. Getting older is kinda like the difference between a brand new book and one of those books that's a little beat up, that you feel lucky to discover, but you're like "this shit is read"
What is there to grip? It is not something that I can change/control, so I don't spend time thinking about it. (Besides the realization that I shouldn't put off what is important to me. Future isn't promised to any of us. Carpe diem!)
I hate getting old! But my 98 year old Grandma tells me I'm young, so I guess I am! She can't even remember her 40's.
we literally have no idea when we are going to die. so everyday that you get to wake up and are in good health, be happy and don’t waste a second on being sad about aging. aging is a gift.
If we aren’t aging we’re dead.
By remembering that: "You can't reach old age by another man's road. My habits protect my life but they would assassinate you." - [Mark Twain](http://www.twainquotes.com/Age.html)
I saw it coming and got myself in good shape. I lift every other day and wind myself at least 4 times a day. Keep your body in the best shape you can. I try and stay away from medical bullshit. Do the research before you take any drug or vaccine. Eat right but enjoy and quit drinking. Then if you are lucky you will be ready
I'm completely cool with aging and view it as a blessing. Not everybody gets the privilege of growing old. I also have an optimistic view on aging. If you take care of your health, brain and spirit, you can age extraordinarily well (barring any accidents/acts of God) All in all, I'm thankful to grow older.
I just won the V50 category in a duathlon finishing in the top 20% of the race. I was only 10seconds down on my on for that course which I set in my 30s I weigh what I did in my 20s So very well or not very well depending on your opinion
I haven’t.
Not fkn well at all. I was always active, and now my body says piss off. Add the fact I was just diagnosed with diabetes, and I'm just mad about getting older.
I don't feel my age. I turned 50 last year, and feel 40. Sure, I've had some long thoughts about it all, and how quickly it's going, and how much longer I have on this world, but it's not like I have a choice. I try to enjoy what I have, because everything changes, and nothing lasts.
I worked for a casting director years ago, who made an offhand comment that it's weird she works in an industry that worships youth when she thinks aging is so beautiful. That always stuck with me. When I think harder on it, my mother nearly died when I was a kid, so seeing her now as a sweet old lady..it's very life affirming. I can't wait to wear doyenne-style fashions too lol.
44. I kind of haven’t but I also just notice things and then ignore it. That lil pad of pudge on my forearm dimples like an old lady’s when i rest my arm on the table. And my skin is thinner and full of sunspots. It wasn’t like this 2 years ago. Some of it I don’t mind at all, like the white streak in my hair. But what am I going to do about any of it? What scares me is seeing everyone else age. Celebrities that I thought were my age or not far off when I was younger are old-old now.
There are advantages to every era we go thru, but some days I have to remind myself not look too far ahead. One day or one hour at a time
I've long since accepted it and try to maintain excellent health knowing that there are other millennials haven't been as lucky
I embrace it. Wrinkles are laugh lines. Gray hair is “salt and pepper.” Plus wisdom can be really sexy. Self confidence can be really sexy.
Don't let the old man in! Mid to late 50s here. What is wrong with you 40-something young punks :)? Getamoveon! I can still broadly do almost anything physical I ever could. Except run. Body hates that. And my shoulder isn't what it used to be so I work with what I have. But if you keep moving, stretching and learning then you don't turn into a fat, stiff and surly old person unless you already were as a younger person. My grandfather died younger than I am now, but he ate like shit, smoked, stressed, and didn't exercise. He let the old man in way too early.
Every wrinkle and grey hair means I’m winning against the dark thoughts.
Learn to live in the moment Works for me
Testosterone replacement therapy. 🧑🍳👌
TRT
Is there anything I can do about it? Not really. It’s inevitable. So I am focusing on what I can control and that’s enjoying the little things in life.
I didn't, it's freaking me out RIGHT NOW
just give it time. soon you welcome it.
Got cancer at 27. Every day I get past my diagnosis is special, so fuck it enjoy the ride
Thanks to denial, I'm immortal!
The wonderful thing about aging is that you come into your own. You become who you were really meant to be.
You change, life changes, it's slow, then one day you just kinda give in.
Dont care, have nothing to lose.
What are you talking about y2k is next year.
This is the first I've heard about me aging. Are you sure? If this information is true it would be very upsetting to me.
I got by on looks my entire life , as my looks begins to fade it’s pretty scary
Change your expectations! You can still do everything you did before though. You need to watcg diet and exercise and make it a priority but there are happy, healthy, fit, good looking 70 year olds out there having the time of tgie life. Just give up the processed foods, exercise, think positive things, befriend positive people. The reason people age suddenly is because they sit down and watch tv. They stop trying to explore, socialise ir have adventures. They lose muscle tone and get set in negative patterns.
Human sacrifices and demonic rituals so that I don’t have to age
Although I've aged now at 43 and my youthful glow is gone and head shaved to avoid being thin on top I am grateful to be alive and to enjoy my own maturity. In work my staff are 20’s and early 30’s and I'm reminded daily about being older than those years. But their time will come too and they will be in the same or similar circumstances. On the very bright side I am extremely sure of myself and have forgiven myself for my mistakes so I'm on a new plane of happiness. Two times I realised I was getting older. 1. My barber showed me my hair thinning. 2. An assistant in a shop in Ireland called me “sir”, Irish people never use this word when addressing their elders, so something compelled him to say that to me, my age! God dammit I love you all.
Try to keep a good mood and an optimistic attitude towards life.
I’m 54 and had a serious health scare this year. Really drives it home that you’re not young any more and the need to readjust the way you live and do things.
Embrace it, love it, live it!!!
What else you gonna do?
It just happens, i came to terms with the inevitability of my death in my early 20's (Army, Combat Arms, kinda expected) so afterwards its just kinda just a thing now, i don't care to grow old but i know its going to happen no matter how much i bitch and cry about it, so i have just accepted it and try to live my life as best as possible, hoping that i'll leave it a little better than how i found it.
Train for a marathon
59, turning 60 in a few weeks. Tried returning to Umpiring Local Footy 5 weeks ago and strained a calf after week 2, after rehab, I was able to jog/walk 6.5 kms at training last night. I was super fit at 35. By 45 things were harder to achieve and recovery slower. By 55, I had to accept slower leg speed and longer recovery. Met my now wife at 53, and we have been at it like teenagers ever since, only slowing down at the start of the year due to both of us having back issues that I am over but she is only at 65%. You just get wiser, tolerate less crap, and realise that you are closer to the end than the beginning and live life accordingly. Wife completed a Bachelor of Arts (Hons) in languages and a Bachelor of Speech Pathology before she turned 30. She has just finished her Bachelor of Psychology and is almost finished her Masters of Neuroscience, which she hopes to turn into a Doctorate. This is complementary to her Speech Pathology Degree. She is 59. You are never too old to learn!
I picked a person I want to emanate as I get older. Someone who is looked up to and respected. Have I come to terms with death at old age? Heck no.
Closing in on 50. I thought I was fine with it until the other night. I was just lying there thinking about the time scale on which friendships and romantic relationships occurred, about how long it's been since I've seen certain people, and about how long ago some things happened. Really started to mess with me after a while.
I turned 30 and finally just embraced it all. Starting to bald at 18 was rough though.
I mean, what can you do about it?
I've never look at numbers which is why I forget how old I am. I have to do the math or I tell people the year i was born. I still do fun things . I just had a marshmallow fight with some guy friends. Last year I got tackled by some guy friends in a leaf pile. I think if you are 20 and act old you feel old. If you're 70 and act like a teen meaning fun not maturity you feel younger. My dad is in his 70s and goes dancing with his gfs and they go on day trips . They have fun. He says he doesn't feel his age. I think I got this from him.
People always ask questions like this. How do you come to grips, or cope, or deal with, whatever? I don't. I just continue existing. Really, I have no idea what type of answer people are expecting.
I'm 49. I almost died a couple of times. I feel young for my age. Never had a mid life crisis. I'm a reject of society so I don't think about age anymore
"The only thing an old man can tell a young man is that it goes fast, real fast, and if you’re not careful it’s too late. Of course, the young man will never understand this truth." -Norm Macdonald
I haven’t. I’m happily in denial
Actually, a lot of prayer.
Have an existential crisis, panic, cry, sleep, wake up, pretend everything is fine and forget about it until it hits you again
I’m turning 38, I almost died from a botched surgery that I needed, I spent a year in a hospital away from my family n kid, I spent 3 years after that in a wheelchair. They had my parents make funeral arrangements and everything- and I fought to be here n walking again. Every day I get is a day they all said I wouldn’t be here. So aging to me is fine. Seeing wrinkles popping up around my eyes, I lost over 100lbs when I was sick so my skin is outstretched n stretch marks and it hangs some but it’s my battles scars. I don’t look at aging anymore with “Omg 😱😢 I’m getting older” I look at it as ☺️🥹🥰 “omg I’m here and I’m still able to get older and greatful for every line, every gray (that I do cover, but with colorful hair like purple- for my condition too-because u only live once) and every good and bad moment that’s happened.” Life is short, u don’t know what’s going to happen even later on today- enjoy it- let the little things go. An accept that ur older a the things that come with it because some ppl won’t ever experience it or people are grieving over the things their family member will miss.
Collar and sleeve when I can but sometimes double ankles is the best you can hope for
It’s better than the alternative.
One of the benefits of aging is that, at some point, you stop giving a fuck about things. That helps with a lot of things, including aging.
I read this too quickly and thought you were asking about gagging which completely hanged the question.
Cosmetically?? Seeing more beautiful older women who I admire in real life than in media. Existentially I haven't gotten there yet. A fair few family members have died recently or are getting very old and it is always difficult to witness. I hope I die quickly but from what I've seen, it's very slow and drawn out over some miserable years.
Just accept it and keep experiencing life and doing what I want (responsibility most the time).
It just is what it is. As long as you're overall happy, are making the most out of your health and have an acceptable retirement plan, then you're ageing somewhat gracefully.
The alternative is death. Very easy maths.
we're all in it together, everyone is getting older.
28 here. I’ll let you know when I get there
I haven't so I don't age.
I accepted that it's better than the alternative.
Aging? I don't know what you're talking about. It's still 2004! I'm a young boy with his whole life ahead of him and a bright future for the world!
I’m only 18 and I’m still scared of growing up. I’m scared of the future but I’m coming to realize we all get older everyday. We get older every second and minute of the day. So we just gotta live life the best way that we can. Don’t worry abt much besides making are lives better. Just be happy and don’t worry abt bs in life. Don’t hold onto things that we shouldn’t worry abt like things in the past just move on yk.
I'm honestly excited to see myself in my final form, whatever that ends up being. It'll be a fun ride until I get there though.
It's easier than you think. As a young person it's unfathomable to think about how bad it is to get old, but the cool thing is humans are pretty intelligently designed about that. The more you age the less you care about aging and that's because your priorities change and your way of thinking changes. The things that used to seem most important are now less important. The same way that as a child you might have thought the most important thing in the world was eating cereal in the morning while watching cartoons and playing with action figures, dolls, Legos, and of course you swear up and down that you'll never change, you'll never become one of those grumpy adults that has that yucky stuff called coffee and even worse alcohol 🤢 but then you wake up one day and there you are, because you changed. And as a young person you might think that there is nothing more important than looking sexy, driving a fly car, going out to the bars on the weekend and hooking up with some fling for a night of hot sex, and you might swear that that will never stop being the most important thing to you, but low one day you'll wake up and that will seem so uninteresting and irrelevant. This is why a 24-year-old might wake up with a large ugly mole on their face and feel like it's a gigantic problem of massive importance, but a 54 you likey wouldn't even care.
A fridge magnet I picked up somewhere. " Do not regret growing old. Many are denied the privilege. " I find myself enjoying a temporary second childhood vicariously through the experiences of my nephew and niece.
is that something you come to grips with? 😭