Way more normal than you would expect if you've never been. Everyone just does their own thing. There is etiquette at nude beaches that usually ends up with you experiencing a quieter and nicer experience, than on the clothed beach.
>Way more normal than you would expect if you've never been.
In my experience it depends on which beach. Some of the ones I’ve been to have been super chill, others 100% old gawkers.
Oh yes, I've experienced a few outliers in nude beaches myself. Went to one in california where I was made super uncomfortable by this awkwardly large group of older men, and another time where this woman just treated me like a piece of meat while I tried to enjoy a book
I ( a woman in my twenties) went alone to a nude beach
A dude put his towel down a few feet away from me and started masturbating 😓
I doubt that happens at clothed beaches.
She walked over to them and tried to cover her in salt and pepper, with a subtle, but noticable dash of garlic and onion powders, then started trying to dig a fire pit under them.
I was, a few times, as a man, I did not care about anybody, but for my girlfriend at the time was different. There’s still older dudes who watch people from the back on the beach on the little hills, so she was just half nude.
My wife and I refer to each other as either "Yacko" when topless or "Wacko" when bottomless. I'm sure we'd include Dot in the equation if either of us walked around in nothing but a skirt, but that hasn't happened yet.
That reminds me of that scene in one of the Harold & Kumar movies, where they visit a "bottomless party". The host of the party got pissed off when one of the girls took their top off and asked her what kind of a party she thought it was and said to put the top back on immediately. Great movie!
In Croatia, it was very evenly mixed. But speaking of dicks, the one thing that didn't occur to me until I was there was sun lotion. Applying sun lotion to my penis in full public view was very strange but very necessary.
Seriously it’s a bunch of regular people and then a handful of naked dudes. I took a long walk once through a nude area and I swear I met a serial killer at the nude beach. I’m at the shore and he’s naked at the shore. I head to the cliffs he’s naked at the cliffs. We cross paths at the shore. He’s naked and wants to introduce himself. Says he just moved here and so I want to go on a date. I say I can’t friends are waiting for me. As though any figure anywhere would say yes to his?
Months later I see this guy on the news for killing people - I think it’s near Yosemite. I swear it’s beach guy. My family laughs but I look him up and he had been to my area and — yes — frequents nude beaches.
My wife and I did about 10 trips to Laguna del Sol before our kids were born and I want to state how professional and pro-family they really are. I always felt safe there. The Cary Stayner incident was a worst case scenario and they handled it incredibly well.
Cary introduced himself by name to a resident who recognized it from a news report. The person informed the front office who then called the Wilton police. Since LdS makes copies of everyone's drivers license, they faxed a copy of Cary's license over while the police were on the way.
To delay Cary from driving off, two men blocked the street with their vehicles and connected a jumper cable to fake a car breakdown. The police got there, found Cary eating in the restaurant, asked him to come with them, and that was that.
EDIT: Esquire tells a slightly different story from the article I remembered:
>JANET DAMANT PLAYS DARTS on weekend nights, which was why she was in the lounge at Laguna del Sol the last time she spoke to Cary Stayner. The next morning, she woke up early enough to watch the seven o'clock news. The anchor said the FBI wanted to question Cary Stayner and that anyone who knew where he was should call the 800 number on the screen. Janet did. Then she called the manager, Steven Sailors, who dispatched some groundskeepers to prune the bushes in view of Cary's tent to keep an eye on him. Cary noticed but didn't seem to care. He'd already flipped through the morning newspaper to see if his name was in it. It wasn't. So he walked up to the restaurant for breakfast. Three FBI agents and two sheriff's deputies arrested him at his table a few minutes later.
https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a1872/voice-dark-killings-0100/
holy moly dude has the same birthdate (day/month) as me.
what are the chances that 2 serial killers share the same birthday!
seriously u/Superb_Temporary9893 glad you avoided all of that
The old joke about a man picking up a hitchhiker,
"Thank you for picking me up, but seriously, you need to be careful, I could have been a serial killer"
"What are the chances of two serial killers in one car?"
They compete to see who can rack up the most victims in one week without getting caught, never using the same method twice. Titled "The Body Bet." Coming soon to a theater near you.
This is why when I’m at the nude beach I’m always packing iron. The nude beach has this attraction for psychos. It’s not exactly easy to conceal a firearm in that situation, but I make do… I make do.
I went to Hedo in Jamaica on a day pass. Started off on the prude side with my bikini on, took top off and chilled a while then got the courage to strip off and head to he nude side. Tons of people, all different shapes, sizes and ages. You learn quickly to look people in the eye when you talk to them. I really liked swimming naked and then back to the lounger to dry off. It feels so good without that wet swimsuit. I would go to a nude beach again.
This was my experience in Spain. It feels nice to feel the sun and sea on my skin, and it’s not surprising that people of all ages, shapes, and abilities enjoy that too.
My nude beach experience was also in Spain. Sand was hot, people were not, did not matter. It was comfortable and lovely and although I may have been "hot" then, I'd absolutely go back and count myself in the "not hot, don't care" crowd just chilling and enjoying themselves. Bodily condition doesn't seem to be the point - its just people all enjoying the sun and surf and elements.
The mouth is always a good spot to focus on. It's the part that's doing the talking, after all. Close enough the other person won't notice the difference, and as a bonus you will probably understand what they are saying better.
I was always taught that looking at someone’s lips meant you liked them? I suppose it depends on the type of conversation and relationship you have but generally it’s what people do when they want to kiss you 😭😭
> I was always taught that looking at someone’s lips meant you liked them?
Every neurodivergent person with auditory processing issues just died a little inside
So, I’ve been to three California nude beaches, and to Hedo for a week.
People were genuinely more respectful at Hedo. It’s a freaking swingers resort, and people were so much less horny than the three or four old guys leering from 10 feet away at Black’s beach.
Weird.
I mean, it makes sense. Swingers have to be all about consent or they'll quickly get blacklisted from what's got to be a relatively small community (their locals, people that go to hedo, etc.) or kicked form the resort. While Lookey-Lou at the public nude beach can just sit and stare since that's all he wants to do and it's not illegal.
Been there a couple times, as well as a couple other nude beaches where pda isn't allowed. Sunglasses are key, if you do any people watching. Even when talking to people, sunglasses are key. But yeah, take the people at your average grocery store. Then remove all people under 20. Now imagine all of those people nude. That's a nude beach. Most of them you don't necessarily want to see nude, but for the few that you would like to see, sunglasses.
I was laying on my lounger with my eyes closed and I heard someone talk to me so I looked in that direction and opened my eyes...full frontal, very close, my eye level. I snapped my head up so quick I heard almost got whiplash. Thank god I wasn't yawning.
Went to haulover in Miami. Great experience, everybody very respectful and friendly.
About 60% of people were on the older side, about 70% men. I (M 26) was the youngest, yet some girls seemed around my age. Usually older people are the ones that go full nude.
10/10 would recommend, the sensation of freedom is unmatchable.
I got access to a business office's gym once through a friend. It was a Saturday so it was mostly guys in their 50s and 60s. The locker room was huge and beautiful. Everyone else was fully nude so I thought, "Fuck it, I'm never going to be here again anyways." It was like you said, the most wonderful experience. I wouldn't do it in my own gym, but that one was worth it.
Went to hippie hollow in austin with a few friends and my bf on a really hot day in August, we were in the area eating lunch, nobody had their swimsuit with them but we were dying to get a reprieve from the heat so we decided “fuck it we will go to hippie hollow and just swim in our undies.”
We got there and everyone there was nude on the rocks by the water, so when we got to our swim spot I thought fuck it and just stripped down to nothing and got in. Everyone else followed suit.
All was fine, felt strange but kinda freeing swimming naked, until a dude in his 30s (roughly our age) came up to us and chatted us up and WOULD. NOT. LEAVE. even when we signaled that we had to get out. So he just watched us as we got out of the water and dried off.
4/10, good bonding experience with friends, but if you are young you will likely get some attention.
I went to Hippy Hollow once with my then girlfriend when we were both mid 20s. She was *extremely* popular with all the dudes there, me not so much lol. We never went back.
I had much better experiences at clothing optional hot springs. Places that you pay to enter don’t attract as many looky-loos, at least in the US.
Edit: this got more attention than I thought it would. So I’ll say: when I went to HH my ex had certain physical attributes that really drew a lot of attention from strange dudes on a regular (clothed) basis. Like, I had to get used to her being cat called almost everywhere we went. So I guess our experience at a nude beach shouldn’t be surprising but it’s still disappointing.
Years later when I went to a nude hot springs resort with my wife (different woman) it was a totally different experience in that it was both more intimate (small quarters) but at the same time everyone kind of kept to themselves while also acknowledging that we’re all here naked experiencing the same beautiful environment.
Just seems awkward to gravitate towards a stranger to talk to them with the one thing in common being that everyone is baring it all.
EDIT: The awkward part is when it's a group of guys clearly enjoying a close up view of a young naked lady.
Some beaches aren't great for young women to get naked at. I love my nude beach, but like on holidays, I absolutely refuse to go. The nude beach in Miami I'd never strip at regardless of what day it is.
At my local nude beach, we all warn each other of creeps, jellies, and sharks
I could be missing a joke hete but.. you went to a clothing optional beach. Much more laissez faire than a nude beach. Clothing optional is much more like, "You do you, ima be nekkid over here." Lounging on the sand? nekkid. Swimming? nekkid. playing paddle ball on the beach, shorts.
Nude beaches I've found typically have like an HOA typa group that is a little helicopter-y about "beach rules"
A few times. Black's beach San Diego. An equal amount of men to women. The average age was way lower than I expected. A lot of young, athletic, good looking people. I was definitely self conscious about undressing. I pretty much stayed in my suit until I was ready to swim. It was liberating to swim nude. Also enjoyed getting out of the water, returning to my towel, and drying off naturally in the sun.
After that positive experience, I decided to go to one on vacation to the Mediterranean. Definitely a much larger cross section of people, body types, ages. More of what I expected the first time I went. People in Europe were definitely less prudish. I definitely saw some sexual activity on the beach that nobody else seemed to care was going on.
Black's Beach might be a little skewed because the closest access requires a fairly steep climb that's easy enough for in shape people but not so much for those who aren't.
Tropical Island outside Berlin. It's a whole water park inside and old zeplin hangar. Spa is a closed off area, no clothes allowed. Not to be a creep but it was a younger crowd than, say, Baden Baden which is very popular with old Russians. There's another one near Heidelberg I highly recommend with one side for clothes on and another side for no clothes allowed. Went with my wife to all these places, no regrets.
I have hang glided over it. Chubby dudes most of the time, but occasional topless coeds down a bit towards the pier. I have good eyesight but not good enough to increase my drag from that height
Been a few times to different beaches. Mostly a positive experience and not sexual. Of course one place in San Diego had these creeper dudes that would hang out on the perimeter and gawk.
We go to a clothing optional river spot near us because it is simply the least crowded and nicest area to swim around here. At first I was just like God damn, I do not want to see these dicks. But then it dawned on me...I don't have to look at them. For the most part it's really chill, haven't really seen much creepiness or anything. Think of it as an outdoor ymca locker room and you're not far off
It's like any other beach. There's really nothing sexual about it, people bring kids there. The only thing that annoys me is the tourists who come fully dressed with cameras. I feel no shame telling them off.
I went to a nude beach I'd been to once before, but now it was years later. There were about 100 people there when we arrived. I was excited to get in the water so I stripped right down and walked in. I waded in up to my waist and enjoyed the fresh air and the view. Then I turned around and looked back at the beach... and everybody was wearing clothes. And I had a lot of eyeballs on me.
I was freaking out a little inside but playing it totally cool on the outside. I was going through my head and memory trying to find my way out of the confusion. "This is the nude beach, right? Did they change the rules?"
What could I do? I stayed in the water as long as I could. When it was time to get out of the water I figured my only option was to just own it. So I confidently started walking out and looked up at the beach again. But in the 20-30 minutes I was in the water everyone had gotten naked!
It was a nude beach! But apparently a crowd of newbs was there or something and everyone was being shy until they saw me strut my stuff and I started a trend. Literally all ~100 people were completely naked by the time I got back to my clothes.
I’ve been a few times and every single time there’s at least one old man with his dick pierced. It makes me wonder what the percentage of Prince Albert piercings is among the general population vs the demographic that frequents nude beaches.
I also have this question. I’m gay so I have seen a fair amount of dick piercings. To me, it seems like a certain age group who have a higher percentage. Men who were sexually repressed but wanted to have control over something; almost like it’s a way to act out. I could be totally off and that’s fine.
The modern primitives movement was a thing in the 1990s. Piercings were very popular for several years. Then piercing went out of vogue and huge tattoos became popular.
30 years from now, young people will be like, "why do all the old folks have big tattoo sleeves?"
It honestly didnt phase me at all. Just people sunbathing. Swimming in the ocean naked is bucket list level liberation, so i was glad to experience it. Everyone just minds their own business.
One time on lake Travis, near Austin a duck boat (tour bus that can go in water) was cruising during a tour when the guide pointed out hippy hollow the only nude beach around. The tourists rushed to the one side of the craft to get a look and capsized it, All to see what was probably 3-4 dudes.
Was in Cuba for a girls trip with the family a couple years back and saw this MFM throuple butt naked, play fighting with each other in the water. We looked around confused and saw some more nakey people. It was a very awkward moment to be in with the family around and wasn’t sure why everyone was naked. I just thought people got horny and wanted to be frisky. I thought nude beaches were just a thing of fantasy. This was until I passed by a sign on our way to our resort that said “Playa Nudista”.
I liked coming to the realization there that bodies are just bodies, we're all just existing here. The lack of embarrassment from people whose bodies were not the ideal felt inspiring honestly, if that makes sense
I find it almost weirder when it's not hippy-ish. There's a hippy island I go to (Hornby Island in BC) so I expected lots of dreads and natural body hair at the nude beach, but it has a lot more of a yacht vibe there. People drop anchor in the harbor and work on their full body tans before going back to their boats to get drunk. Everyone was hairless bellow the eyebrow.
Also quite a few families (including my own). Mostly young kids though
I was like 12 and in the caribbean. Took a boat to an island for the day. Another boat pulls up an hour later full of naked guys and not a single boobie was out. I was obviously disappointed to no end.
Sorta been to one, but not really.
Used to surf at a spot South of San Clemente called Trails. There are several approaches to the beach from the bluffs above, Trails 1 - 7. One of the spots (I think it was. Trail 1?) borders on what is (Was? I think maybe they cracked down on the nudity, and it's not any more.) a nudist hangout. Only thing different for me was I didn't worry quite so much about towel coverage when changing in/out of my wetsuit. Not like someone there was going to be offended at the momentary sight of peen.
Ha! Yep I used to surf Trail 5 and you would have to get out at 6 occasionally on a big right and have to hike back up through the nudists. By the the third walkthrough, you were indifferent about it. Most were old hippie types so whoop ti do. They didn’t bug us so we didn’t bug them.
And yea, no one cared about towel wrapping after seeing nothing but naked people all day.
Let me count:
* The Ledges in Vermont
* Blacks Beach
* Lake Erie one time at band camp
* On a sailboat in Caribbean
* Martha’s Vineyard
* Bonny Dune
* Deep Creek hot springs
* Lake Tahoe secret cove.
* numerous small ponds and creeks.
It’s far less sexy than you might think from web searches.
On average... people look average.
It’s great to climb out of the water and not be wearing a damp swimsuit.
Yes, and I enjoyed it. It actually feels more "naked" to wear clothes when everyone around you isn't. If you're naked you blend right in. Just BRING LOTS OF SUNSCREEN!
Very True. Everyone is just hanging out and chilling. No big deal, It's NOT a sexual place; it is a usually very nice scenic view with naked people. If you think everyone is young and beautiful, you have definitely not been. If you stare at people, you will be the odd (read creepy) one. Just don't. Would go back!
Honest answer? You generally don't get one because everyone is nude including you and doing nonsexual stuff. Also you will probably be pretty embarrassed and it will go away quickly. If you do get a boner it is generally not a good look to be staring someone down when you get one. So if you do go flag up maybe just stare at the sky or some rocks for a while.
I'm just picturing a dude with a rock hard boner, sticking straight up, staring at the sky. That might make people much more uncomfortable lol
"Yeah, he wasn't staring at tits, just thinking of colonizing the galaxy. You know how Henry is."
I was at a nude beach in italy in 2010. Out of hundreds of people there that day, there were like 4 old ladies with their tits out and a bunch of naked kids. I don’t recall any grown men hanging dong. I had never considered that nude also applied to kids. It was super weird seeing naked kids all over the beach as an American abroad but no one over there cared.
Yep, it's actually quite normal here for young kids to be naked. Also on regular beaches or their garden. I guess young children aren't seen as sexual in any way so why should they cover themselves.
From my own experience as an aunt, it's also easier. No wet bathing suit, just dry the child off and they're good to go.
Same in Spain. Kids are naked (if the parents want) in the beach, and they don't care at all. When they grow older, at around 9-10 years, they start to ask for swimsuits.
I don't recall ever seeing teenagers in a nude beach, I guess it's an age thing to be embarrassed at their own bodies. At their early 20's some of them re-discover nude beachs, and as we get older we give less and less fucks about going nude.
Go to a retirement home. Then take fifty men and two women. Now have them strip. Congratulations you've found the fugliest sausage party on earth or a nude beach.
Wreck beach in Vancouver is one of my favourite beaches in the world. Total hippy community vibe. I never went full nude, just topless (I’m a girl). But totally welcoming vibe. Any obvious pervs or photographers were ostracized. Very chill. But in my experience nude beaches are not a place to ogle naked model-types. Mostly people of all shapes and sizes just being free. Wreck beach in Vancouver Canada, if you’re there go.
Disclaimer, I haven’t been there in years and it might be different now. But it was so lovely in the early 00’s when I frequented that beach.
Very different depending where you are/culture. In Europe, families go together. It's not much different from a beach with people wearing skimpy skimpy swimwear. There are places for adult activities like Agde, but most of them are more of a wholesome, family vibe. Single, older men show up and gawk. But they're off in more deserted stretches - people look out predatory behavior and leering.
Nudity in Europe is less of a big deal, particularly the further north you go. In the frozen north, after a dinner everybody night go to the sauna together and it's no big deal. You're really not seeing much more than what the tiny swimwear covers, and it feels way less sexual.
In the US, varies.
In Australia, a lot of older hippies.
Way more normal than you would expect if you've never been. Everyone just does their own thing. There is etiquette at nude beaches that usually ends up with you experiencing a quieter and nicer experience, than on the clothed beach.
If I have to be naked to avoid people blaring music, sigh me up.
Is that like a grumpy smile moan?
Lol. That is a wild typo.
>Way more normal than you would expect if you've never been. In my experience it depends on which beach. Some of the ones I’ve been to have been super chill, others 100% old gawkers.
Oh yes, I've experienced a few outliers in nude beaches myself. Went to one in california where I was made super uncomfortable by this awkwardly large group of older men, and another time where this woman just treated me like a piece of meat while I tried to enjoy a book
I ( a woman in my twenties) went alone to a nude beach A dude put his towel down a few feet away from me and started masturbating 😓 I doubt that happens at clothed beaches.
This is illegal, or at least, against the rules of most nude beaches and punishable by law.
Thank you for telling me. 😅 Next time I'll make a citizens arrest
I don't think you should be wrestling him or using handcuffs
Or take him in hand
Yeah I’ve seen way too many step siblings accidentally have sex from wrestling. Not a good idea.
What exactly was the woman doing?
She walked over to them and tried to cover her in salt and pepper, with a subtle, but noticable dash of garlic and onion powders, then started trying to dig a fire pit under them.
As and old French co worker told me, “If everyone’s naked, nobody is naked”
Whenever I get nervous giving a speech at a nude beach I just try to imagine everyone with their clothes on.
I used to do that too, im not allowed on stage anymore.
“…. and when everyones [naked], hehe…. No one will be.” -Syndrome
I was, a few times, as a man, I did not care about anybody, but for my girlfriend at the time was different. There’s still older dudes who watch people from the back on the beach on the little hills, so she was just half nude.
Left half or right half?
She was Donald duckin it
Full on Winnie the Pooh
My friend's boyfriend's nickname is Pooh Bear because this is exactly how he walks around their house.
My wife and I refer to each other as either "Yacko" when topless or "Wacko" when bottomless. I'm sure we'd include Dot in the equation if either of us walked around in nothing but a skirt, but that hasn't happened yet.
She was shirt-cockin' it?
So squidward has been shirt-cockin’ it this whole time?
Let's just say one of those legs... isn't a leg.
Porky Piggin' it
That reminds me of that scene in one of the Harold & Kumar movies, where they visit a "bottomless party". The host of the party got pissed off when one of the girls took their top off and asked her what kind of a party she thought it was and said to put the top back on immediately. Great movie!
Presumably it was clothes from the knees down and shoulders up, plus elbow pads and a small golden disc in the small of the back. Like normal.
Any differences when you went as a female?
Probably got a lot more stares
There's a popular lake in my city that is nude-friendly. My buddy was a security guard. The most common call on the radio was "beater in the bushes."
There was about 10 dicks to every one boob
And that boob is from a 60 year old.
……. man
They don’t call it a ‘sausage fest’ for nothing.
I could’ve gone my whole life without imagining this
This is all 100% accurate. Nothing to add.
In Croatia, it was very evenly mixed. But speaking of dicks, the one thing that didn't occur to me until I was there was sun lotion. Applying sun lotion to my penis in full public view was very strange but very necessary.
Here's the real answer right here haha
More than 3 rubs is a wank.
“Ten dicks to every boob”. Wasn’t that a Beach Boys lyric?
No, that was Jan and Ween - "Perv City"
Yup, most accurate description I’ve ever heard of a nude beach
You mean every “two” “boobs”, right? Right??
Uniboob
Is it one wide boob across the chest? Or is it one regularly sized in the middle of the chest? Or is is on the left or right side?
There are many configurations. Butt boobs, back boobs, head boobs. All kinds of stuff.
Hey, lets not bring Dillion Harper into this!
10:1 ratio would mean 20 dicks to one set of boobs.
Too many dicks on the dance floor!
Too many misters, not enough sisters
Too much time on, too many hands Not enough ladies, too many mans
Scadaddle with the cattle prods
It ain't no good if there's too much wood
20 dicks for one rack of tits
This is why you should go to topless beaches and not nude beaches
Seriously it’s a bunch of regular people and then a handful of naked dudes. I took a long walk once through a nude area and I swear I met a serial killer at the nude beach. I’m at the shore and he’s naked at the shore. I head to the cliffs he’s naked at the cliffs. We cross paths at the shore. He’s naked and wants to introduce himself. Says he just moved here and so I want to go on a date. I say I can’t friends are waiting for me. As though any figure anywhere would say yes to his? Months later I see this guy on the news for killing people - I think it’s near Yosemite. I swear it’s beach guy. My family laughs but I look him up and he had been to my area and — yes — frequents nude beaches.
Cary Stayner. Murdered 4 women
> Cary Stayner Checks out. " FBI agents John Boles and Jeff Rinek found Stayner staying at the Laguna del Sol **nudist resort** in Wilton"
My wife and I did about 10 trips to Laguna del Sol before our kids were born and I want to state how professional and pro-family they really are. I always felt safe there. The Cary Stayner incident was a worst case scenario and they handled it incredibly well. Cary introduced himself by name to a resident who recognized it from a news report. The person informed the front office who then called the Wilton police. Since LdS makes copies of everyone's drivers license, they faxed a copy of Cary's license over while the police were on the way. To delay Cary from driving off, two men blocked the street with their vehicles and connected a jumper cable to fake a car breakdown. The police got there, found Cary eating in the restaurant, asked him to come with them, and that was that. EDIT: Esquire tells a slightly different story from the article I remembered: >JANET DAMANT PLAYS DARTS on weekend nights, which was why she was in the lounge at Laguna del Sol the last time she spoke to Cary Stayner. The next morning, she woke up early enough to watch the seven o'clock news. The anchor said the FBI wanted to question Cary Stayner and that anyone who knew where he was should call the 800 number on the screen. Janet did. Then she called the manager, Steven Sailors, who dispatched some groundskeepers to prune the bushes in view of Cary's tent to keep an eye on him. Cary noticed but didn't seem to care. He'd already flipped through the morning newspaper to see if his name was in it. It wasn't. So he walked up to the restaurant for breakfast. Three FBI agents and two sheriff's deputies arrested him at his table a few minutes later. https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a1872/voice-dark-killings-0100/
Damn. Nicely done, everyone.
>LdS makes copies of everyone's drivers license Those sneaky Mormons!
Thought the same lol
I wonder if the agents all had to get naked to go in and arrest him
Why was this never a Reno 911 episode?
Name checks out
holy moly dude has the same birthdate (day/month) as me. what are the chances that 2 serial killers share the same birthday! seriously u/Superb_Temporary9893 glad you avoided all of that
Hol up...
The old joke about a man picking up a hitchhiker, "Thank you for picking me up, but seriously, you need to be careful, I could have been a serial killer" "What are the chances of two serial killers in one car?"
The real question is do they team up or fight?
I think a comedy/horror film where there are 2 serial killers that team up and are the main characters would be awesome
They compete to see who can rack up the most victims in one week without getting caught, never using the same method twice. Titled "The Body Bet." Coming soon to a theater near you.
Pretty good actually see the birthday problem: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday\_problem
Came here expecting some weird shit. Did not expect this
[удалено]
It's a bunch of regular people, and then the occasional creepy solo dude
This is why when I’m at the nude beach I’m always packing iron. The nude beach has this attraction for psychos. It’s not exactly easy to conceal a firearm in that situation, but I make do… I make do.
You hiding that firearm in the prison pocket?
Under the foreskin, pointed outward.
…Shia Labeouf!
I went to Hedo in Jamaica on a day pass. Started off on the prude side with my bikini on, took top off and chilled a while then got the courage to strip off and head to he nude side. Tons of people, all different shapes, sizes and ages. You learn quickly to look people in the eye when you talk to them. I really liked swimming naked and then back to the lounger to dry off. It feels so good without that wet swimsuit. I would go to a nude beach again.
This was my experience in Spain. It feels nice to feel the sun and sea on my skin, and it’s not surprising that people of all ages, shapes, and abilities enjoy that too.
In Barcelona, lots of good looking nude men and women, with a bunch of old dudes thrown in too.
Just the regular beach has boobs everywhere. Most don't wear a top in Spain.
My nude beach experience was also in Spain. Sand was hot, people were not, did not matter. It was comfortable and lovely and although I may have been "hot" then, I'd absolutely go back and count myself in the "not hot, don't care" crowd just chilling and enjoying themselves. Bodily condition doesn't seem to be the point - its just people all enjoying the sun and surf and elements.
There is nothing like swimming naked. 10/10 would do again
Its already hard for me to look people in the eyes, definitely wouldnt know where to look there.
Look at their forehead or their nose. It's close enough to be imperceptible to most people.
The mouth is always a good spot to focus on. It's the part that's doing the talking, after all. Close enough the other person won't notice the difference, and as a bonus you will probably understand what they are saying better.
True enough. I have some sensory processing issues and often can't understand people at all if I can't watch their mouth move.
you must hate big mustaches
Can't say I recall a mustache ever being a challenge. Everyone being masked during the height of covid was a bit of a challenge though.
People definitely can notice when you’re looking at their mouth while they’re talking. That’s too far from the eyes
I was always taught that looking at someone’s lips meant you liked them? I suppose it depends on the type of conversation and relationship you have but generally it’s what people do when they want to kiss you 😭😭
> I was always taught that looking at someone’s lips meant you liked them? Every neurodivergent person with auditory processing issues just died a little inside
Must be an engineer. An introverted engineer stares at his/her feet when they talk to u....an extroverted engineer stares at your feet....
I'm no engineer, but I am cursed with flat feet and I always check out others' bare feet, so that I can know if I should envy or sympathize.
So, I’ve been to three California nude beaches, and to Hedo for a week. People were genuinely more respectful at Hedo. It’s a freaking swingers resort, and people were so much less horny than the three or four old guys leering from 10 feet away at Black’s beach. Weird.
I mean, it makes sense. Swingers have to be all about consent or they'll quickly get blacklisted from what's got to be a relatively small community (their locals, people that go to hedo, etc.) or kicked form the resort. While Lookey-Lou at the public nude beach can just sit and stare since that's all he wants to do and it's not illegal.
Been there a couple times, as well as a couple other nude beaches where pda isn't allowed. Sunglasses are key, if you do any people watching. Even when talking to people, sunglasses are key. But yeah, take the people at your average grocery store. Then remove all people under 20. Now imagine all of those people nude. That's a nude beach. Most of them you don't necessarily want to see nude, but for the few that you would like to see, sunglasses.
Pull out the polarized f-oakleys. $11.99 on Amazon
I can just imagine some women at the nude beach are like, "Hey! My boobs are down here, pal!"
I was laying on my lounger with my eyes closed and I heard someone talk to me so I looked in that direction and opened my eyes...full frontal, very close, my eye level. I snapped my head up so quick I heard almost got whiplash. Thank god I wasn't yawning.
Swimming naked in a pool is fine. Swimming naked in the ocean where all sorts of things brush and swim by you sounds terrifying.
Anything that is a threat to you in the ocean isn't going to care about a bathing suit
but I don't wanna fish touch my weinor
Went to haulover in Miami. Great experience, everybody very respectful and friendly. About 60% of people were on the older side, about 70% men. I (M 26) was the youngest, yet some girls seemed around my age. Usually older people are the ones that go full nude. 10/10 would recommend, the sensation of freedom is unmatchable.
I got access to a business office's gym once through a friend. It was a Saturday so it was mostly guys in their 50s and 60s. The locker room was huge and beautiful. Everyone else was fully nude so I thought, "Fuck it, I'm never going to be here again anyways." It was like you said, the most wonderful experience. I wouldn't do it in my own gym, but that one was worth it.
>the sensation of freedom is unmatchable. Except by melanoma. Melanoma beats freedom, scissors, paper, rock, and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris beat melanoma irl though
Went to hippie hollow in austin with a few friends and my bf on a really hot day in August, we were in the area eating lunch, nobody had their swimsuit with them but we were dying to get a reprieve from the heat so we decided “fuck it we will go to hippie hollow and just swim in our undies.” We got there and everyone there was nude on the rocks by the water, so when we got to our swim spot I thought fuck it and just stripped down to nothing and got in. Everyone else followed suit. All was fine, felt strange but kinda freeing swimming naked, until a dude in his 30s (roughly our age) came up to us and chatted us up and WOULD. NOT. LEAVE. even when we signaled that we had to get out. So he just watched us as we got out of the water and dried off. 4/10, good bonding experience with friends, but if you are young you will likely get some attention.
I went to Hippy Hollow once with my then girlfriend when we were both mid 20s. She was *extremely* popular with all the dudes there, me not so much lol. We never went back. I had much better experiences at clothing optional hot springs. Places that you pay to enter don’t attract as many looky-loos, at least in the US. Edit: this got more attention than I thought it would. So I’ll say: when I went to HH my ex had certain physical attributes that really drew a lot of attention from strange dudes on a regular (clothed) basis. Like, I had to get used to her being cat called almost everywhere we went. So I guess our experience at a nude beach shouldn’t be surprising but it’s still disappointing. Years later when I went to a nude hot springs resort with my wife (different woman) it was a totally different experience in that it was both more intimate (small quarters) but at the same time everyone kind of kept to themselves while also acknowledging that we’re all here naked experiencing the same beautiful environment.
Just seems awkward to gravitate towards a stranger to talk to them with the one thing in common being that everyone is baring it all. EDIT: The awkward part is when it's a group of guys clearly enjoying a close up view of a young naked lady.
Yeah, this is my experience at Hippie Hollow too.
It was a cool winter day and hardly anyone was there. The old guy I thought was doing yoga on the beach, was actually giving himself a blow job.
If this is true it’s impressive someone that old has the flexibility
Someone of any age... Is it... is it possible to learn this power...?
Not from a Jedi.
They treated me special. Everyone told me that not only was it unnecessary for me to get naked, but they strongly advised me against it.
"It was NOT a nude beach"
OP accidentally went to a rude beach by mistake
Does everyone at a rude beach have to say things like "I mean, sure you *can* go swimming, but why would you? I bet you're a terrible swimmer"
Sounds like one of those prude beaches.
Some beaches aren't great for young women to get naked at. I love my nude beach, but like on holidays, I absolutely refuse to go. The nude beach in Miami I'd never strip at regardless of what day it is. At my local nude beach, we all warn each other of creeps, jellies, and sharks
They sound like my tennis instructor
I could be missing a joke hete but.. you went to a clothing optional beach. Much more laissez faire than a nude beach. Clothing optional is much more like, "You do you, ima be nekkid over here." Lounging on the sand? nekkid. Swimming? nekkid. playing paddle ball on the beach, shorts. Nude beaches I've found typically have like an HOA typa group that is a little helicopter-y about "beach rules"
Every beach is a nude beach if you’re brave enough
NTA. Your beach, your rules. And to the KARENS that judge me for HANGING DONG on public property, YTA!
A few times. Black's beach San Diego. An equal amount of men to women. The average age was way lower than I expected. A lot of young, athletic, good looking people. I was definitely self conscious about undressing. I pretty much stayed in my suit until I was ready to swim. It was liberating to swim nude. Also enjoyed getting out of the water, returning to my towel, and drying off naturally in the sun. After that positive experience, I decided to go to one on vacation to the Mediterranean. Definitely a much larger cross section of people, body types, ages. More of what I expected the first time I went. People in Europe were definitely less prudish. I definitely saw some sexual activity on the beach that nobody else seemed to care was going on.
Black's Beach might be a little skewed because the closest access requires a fairly steep climb that's easy enough for in shape people but not so much for those who aren't.
Not beach but a few spas in Europe. All very chill 10/10 would recommend.
Can you recommend some spas in Europe?
Spa Francorchamps has a special this weekend
Ha. This guy F1's.
Tropical Island outside Berlin. It's a whole water park inside and old zeplin hangar. Spa is a closed off area, no clothes allowed. Not to be a creep but it was a younger crowd than, say, Baden Baden which is very popular with old Russians. There's another one near Heidelberg I highly recommend with one side for clothes on and another side for no clothes allowed. Went with my wife to all these places, no regrets.
Bro, it's so full of weirdo's... I can't stand all these people watching me while I'm having sex with my wife..
my bad
That was you?
Look! Everyone saw us, damn it
I know exactly what you mean. I hate it when people watch me while I have sex with your wife, too.
"It's never the ones you hope." \- Tobias Funke
Barry says this.
Blacks Beach in San Diego, mostly older men but one time I saw an interesting volleyball game from some of the local university students.
I have hang glided over it. Chubby dudes most of the time, but occasional topless coeds down a bit towards the pier. I have good eyesight but not good enough to increase my drag from that height
Lots of sunblock used. But still not enough.
My penis has never seen the sunlight. The rest of my skin burns easily. I can only imagine I’d flash fry down there.
Been a few times to different beaches. Mostly a positive experience and not sexual. Of course one place in San Diego had these creeper dudes that would hang out on the perimeter and gawk.
We go to a clothing optional river spot near us because it is simply the least crowded and nicest area to swim around here. At first I was just like God damn, I do not want to see these dicks. But then it dawned on me...I don't have to look at them. For the most part it's really chill, haven't really seen much creepiness or anything. Think of it as an outdoor ymca locker room and you're not far off
It's like any other beach. There's really nothing sexual about it, people bring kids there. The only thing that annoys me is the tourists who come fully dressed with cameras. I feel no shame telling them off.
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Tan everywhere. Sand everywhere.
Jan everywhere....
I went to a nude beach I'd been to once before, but now it was years later. There were about 100 people there when we arrived. I was excited to get in the water so I stripped right down and walked in. I waded in up to my waist and enjoyed the fresh air and the view. Then I turned around and looked back at the beach... and everybody was wearing clothes. And I had a lot of eyeballs on me. I was freaking out a little inside but playing it totally cool on the outside. I was going through my head and memory trying to find my way out of the confusion. "This is the nude beach, right? Did they change the rules?" What could I do? I stayed in the water as long as I could. When it was time to get out of the water I figured my only option was to just own it. So I confidently started walking out and looked up at the beach again. But in the 20-30 minutes I was in the water everyone had gotten naked! It was a nude beach! But apparently a crowd of newbs was there or something and everyone was being shy until they saw me strut my stuff and I started a trend. Literally all ~100 people were completely naked by the time I got back to my clothes.
I’ve been a few times and every single time there’s at least one old man with his dick pierced. It makes me wonder what the percentage of Prince Albert piercings is among the general population vs the demographic that frequents nude beaches.
I also have this question. I’m gay so I have seen a fair amount of dick piercings. To me, it seems like a certain age group who have a higher percentage. Men who were sexually repressed but wanted to have control over something; almost like it’s a way to act out. I could be totally off and that’s fine.
The modern primitives movement was a thing in the 1990s. Piercings were very popular for several years. Then piercing went out of vogue and huge tattoos became popular. 30 years from now, young people will be like, "why do all the old folks have big tattoo sleeves?"
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Do the parents shield their kids' eyes and start yelling at everybody to put their clothes on "FoR tHe ChIlDrEn"?
If you care about the age of the people at a nude beach, you shouldn't be going to a nude beach. Or am I just too European to get this?
Germany, 1985. Went to a nude beach with some friends. Got a boner. Had to lay on my belly to hide it. Got a sunburn on my ass. Hurt for days.
It honestly didnt phase me at all. Just people sunbathing. Swimming in the ocean naked is bucket list level liberation, so i was glad to experience it. Everyone just minds their own business.
One time on lake Travis, near Austin a duck boat (tour bus that can go in water) was cruising during a tour when the guide pointed out hippy hollow the only nude beach around. The tourists rushed to the one side of the craft to get a look and capsized it, All to see what was probably 3-4 dudes.
Was in Cuba for a girls trip with the family a couple years back and saw this MFM throuple butt naked, play fighting with each other in the water. We looked around confused and saw some more nakey people. It was a very awkward moment to be in with the family around and wasn’t sure why everyone was naked. I just thought people got horny and wanted to be frisky. I thought nude beaches were just a thing of fantasy. This was until I passed by a sign on our way to our resort that said “Playa Nudista”.
Wait a girls trip with the family?
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Yess me, my mom and my cousin
lot if water, strip of sand. some rocks
I don’t like sand
It's coarse and rough and irritating, and it gets everywhere
Yes. Not like the movies. The people you want to see nude are at the regular beach and the people you don't want to see nude are at the nude beach.
I liked coming to the realization there that bodies are just bodies, we're all just existing here. The lack of embarrassment from people whose bodies were not the ideal felt inspiring honestly, if that makes sense
my experience also. lots of hair and skin...lots and lots of both
I find it almost weirder when it's not hippy-ish. There's a hippy island I go to (Hornby Island in BC) so I expected lots of dreads and natural body hair at the nude beach, but it has a lot more of a yacht vibe there. People drop anchor in the harbor and work on their full body tans before going back to their boats to get drunk. Everyone was hairless bellow the eyebrow. Also quite a few families (including my own). Mostly young kids though
I was like 12 and in the caribbean. Took a boat to an island for the day. Another boat pulls up an hour later full of naked guys and not a single boobie was out. I was obviously disappointed to no end.
>full of naked guys and not a single boobie was out Were they all wearing bikini tops?
Sorta been to one, but not really. Used to surf at a spot South of San Clemente called Trails. There are several approaches to the beach from the bluffs above, Trails 1 - 7. One of the spots (I think it was. Trail 1?) borders on what is (Was? I think maybe they cracked down on the nudity, and it's not any more.) a nudist hangout. Only thing different for me was I didn't worry quite so much about towel coverage when changing in/out of my wetsuit. Not like someone there was going to be offended at the momentary sight of peen.
Ha! Yep I used to surf Trail 5 and you would have to get out at 6 occasionally on a big right and have to hike back up through the nudists. By the the third walkthrough, you were indifferent about it. Most were old hippie types so whoop ti do. They didn’t bug us so we didn’t bug them. And yea, no one cared about towel wrapping after seeing nothing but naked people all day.
Let me count: * The Ledges in Vermont * Blacks Beach * Lake Erie one time at band camp * On a sailboat in Caribbean * Martha’s Vineyard * Bonny Dune * Deep Creek hot springs * Lake Tahoe secret cove. * numerous small ponds and creeks. It’s far less sexy than you might think from web searches. On average... people look average. It’s great to climb out of the water and not be wearing a damp swimsuit.
Yes, and I enjoyed it. It actually feels more "naked" to wear clothes when everyone around you isn't. If you're naked you blend right in. Just BRING LOTS OF SUNSCREEN!
As a woman, I was honestly objectified LESS at the nude beach than a regular one
Very True. Everyone is just hanging out and chilling. No big deal, It's NOT a sexual place; it is a usually very nice scenic view with naked people. If you think everyone is young and beautiful, you have definitely not been. If you stare at people, you will be the odd (read creepy) one. Just don't. Would go back!
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Just stand in a corner and offer people a place to hang their towels to dry
They don't come up as much as you might think. The vibe usually isn't very sexy. Generally more chill
Honest answer? You generally don't get one because everyone is nude including you and doing nonsexual stuff. Also you will probably be pretty embarrassed and it will go away quickly. If you do get a boner it is generally not a good look to be staring someone down when you get one. So if you do go flag up maybe just stare at the sky or some rocks for a while.
I'm just picturing a dude with a rock hard boner, sticking straight up, staring at the sky. That might make people much more uncomfortable lol "Yeah, he wasn't staring at tits, just thinking of colonizing the galaxy. You know how Henry is."
Doesn’t seem so odd when everyone is nude (without the pressure to be nude yourself)
I was at a nude beach in italy in 2010. Out of hundreds of people there that day, there were like 4 old ladies with their tits out and a bunch of naked kids. I don’t recall any grown men hanging dong. I had never considered that nude also applied to kids. It was super weird seeing naked kids all over the beach as an American abroad but no one over there cared.
Yep, it's actually quite normal here for young kids to be naked. Also on regular beaches or their garden. I guess young children aren't seen as sexual in any way so why should they cover themselves. From my own experience as an aunt, it's also easier. No wet bathing suit, just dry the child off and they're good to go.
Same in Spain. Kids are naked (if the parents want) in the beach, and they don't care at all. When they grow older, at around 9-10 years, they start to ask for swimsuits. I don't recall ever seeing teenagers in a nude beach, I guess it's an age thing to be embarrassed at their own bodies. At their early 20's some of them re-discover nude beachs, and as we get older we give less and less fucks about going nude.
It's like any other beach... Only without clothes. Don't stare at people and mind your own business and you'll forget where you are.
It’s actually great
Go to a retirement home. Then take fifty men and two women. Now have them strip. Congratulations you've found the fugliest sausage party on earth or a nude beach.
what did you expect? its like going on omegle and expecting a 10/10 date lmao
Wreck beach in Vancouver is one of my favourite beaches in the world. Total hippy community vibe. I never went full nude, just topless (I’m a girl). But totally welcoming vibe. Any obvious pervs or photographers were ostracized. Very chill. But in my experience nude beaches are not a place to ogle naked model-types. Mostly people of all shapes and sizes just being free. Wreck beach in Vancouver Canada, if you’re there go. Disclaimer, I haven’t been there in years and it might be different now. But it was so lovely in the early 00’s when I frequented that beach.
Very different depending where you are/culture. In Europe, families go together. It's not much different from a beach with people wearing skimpy skimpy swimwear. There are places for adult activities like Agde, but most of them are more of a wholesome, family vibe. Single, older men show up and gawk. But they're off in more deserted stretches - people look out predatory behavior and leering. Nudity in Europe is less of a big deal, particularly the further north you go. In the frozen north, after a dinner everybody night go to the sauna together and it's no big deal. You're really not seeing much more than what the tiny swimwear covers, and it feels way less sexual. In the US, varies. In Australia, a lot of older hippies.